Each of mankind's succeeding generations has imposed severe penalities upon incestuous partners, and have established clearly defined rules and procedures for controlling the participation of sex between members of the same family.
Whereas the statutes and regulations are severe, the keenest control of all, comes from the society per se, so that universally, individuals themselves exert the greatest deterrent against this fear inspiring sexual act.
Each civilization, no matter how primitive and savage by our standards, has outlawed incest and further, has defined the degree of guilt to be attached to it, and the punishment to be metered out for committing it.
The term incest, is itself associated with sex and marriage from its earliest beginnings. The cestus or girdle was worn by women and loosened by her husband to bring conjugal and parental happiness. Its disuse was known as making marriage incestuous.
Until the eleventh century, marriage between Cousins was forbidden. Incest was taboo and thought was that it corrupted the youth in the family group while they were helpless and dependent on the older members of the family for protection and care. It was forbidden by both civil laws, as well as the ecclesiastical laws of the Roman church which decried it as forbidden relationships, in both the descending and ascending lines of kinship. And even Henry the VIII decreed that sex relations between a man and his wife's sister, and between a wife and her husband's brother was banned.
The basic reason for the disapproval of incest in any of its forms is the harmful effects it has on the family structure, to which it is a threat. The father image who is the head of the family and therefore represents the state is destroyed when he is involved with one of his family. The most sordid incest relationship is that of mother and son, for through all ages mother is exalted because of her unique role of child bearing and child raising. When her role in the family is debased, the basic structure of the family is destroyed, for she is the heart and the foundation of the emotional life of the children.
CHAPTER ONE
Incest is not anti-biological. That is, two related persons can have coitus and pregnancy can be caused. But incest is a violation of all established social regulations in just about all societies and cultures. Few even recognize the offspring of an incestuous union.
"However much sexual ethics may differ in various forms of culture there is one law that is universal--the law of incest. Nowhere in the world is it permissible for cohabitation to take place between father and daughter, mother and son, brother and sister." declares Kenneth Walker, M.D., in Physiology of Sex. 'This law of incest existed in the past as it does in the present. It is true that in the royal families of ancient Egypt and Peru the marriage of brother and sister was customary, but this was because their families being God-like, no ordinary mortals could unite with them. But for the rest of the nation, the law of incest held. Its object was clearly to prevent the disintegration of the family. Sexual interests would put a heavy strain on the emotional and social bonds upon which the cohesion of the family depends, and sexual interest was thrust sternly outside the family circle."
The word incest is taken from the Latin: in means "not" and castus means "pure." Thus, the exact Latin word is incestum-an impure act. Sexologically speaking, incest is an impure act between two individuals who are related by blood or marriage. (Marriage relations refer to stepbrother and stepsister as well as just about all other such relations except, of course, husband and wife who were not otherwise related.)
It has been seen that in the most primitive and savage societies, in nearly all parts of the world, incest is regarded with abomination. Dr. George P. Murdock, writing in Social Regulation of Sexual Behavior, explains, "The one social phenomenon with which sexual regulation is associated in every known society is kinship. Intrafamily incest taboos are absolutely universal. In none of the 250 sample societies, nor in any other that I have ever read about, is either sexual intercourse or marriage considered permissible between father and daughter, mother and son, or brother and sister.
"Sporadic individual cases of incest crop up everywhere, of course, and in some instances incestuous unions are permitted under highly exceptional circumstances. Thus among the Azande of central Africa, certain high nobles are allowed to wed their own daughters, and brother-sister marriages were actually preferred in the old Hawaiian aristocracy and in the Inca royal family.
"The natives of Bali in Indonesia permit twin brothers and sisters to marry on the ground that they have already been unduly intimate in their mother's womb, and among the Thonga of East Africa, an important hunter, preparatory to a great hunt, may have sex relations with his own daughter--a heinous act under any other circumstances. In no case, however, are such incestuous unions common, or permitted to the general run of the population."
Mental incest may exist solely in the phantasy realm and does not transpose into actual physical relations. One such situation is related by Krafft-Ebing in Psychopathia Sexualis:
"Z., age 51, superintendent, enamoured with his own daughter since her puberty. She had to leave home and reside with relatives abroad. He was a peculiar, nervous man, somewhat given to drink, without manifest taint. He denied being in love with his daughter, but the latter stated that he acted and behaved toward her like a lover.
"Z., was very jealous of every man who ever approached his daughter. He threatened to commit suicide if she ever married, and on one occasion proposed to her that they should die together. He knew how to arrange things so that he could always be alone with her, and overwhelmed her with presents and caresses. No signs of hypersexuality. Did not keep a mistress and was looked upon as a very decent man."
There are other cases reported in which incest takes a physical action, often with a sister acting as the aggressive partner. This seems unusual when we regard the male as being the forceful agent.
Benjamin Karpman, M.D., in Sexual Offender, states, "A case that came under my observation was that of a young white male who, at the age of ten, was seduced by his older sister. When he reached puberty, the sister frightened by possible consequences, abruptly ceased the relationship. The boy later developed into an absolute homosexual. He couldn't imagine himself developing an erection and have satisfactory relations with a woman. 'I think, though, to this day, that I could develop an erection with my sister without difficulty.'"
Dr. Karpman connects-the incest urge to the homosexual drive. "In some cases their excessive devotion to their mothers is by no means an unconscious matter, but is frankly and openly admitted, even to the extent of their becoming somewhat boastful about it. It is almost as if they were to say, T can speak of my excessive love for my mother, since there is nothing sexual about it.' Having originally solved the incest problem by rejecting their mothers and, additionally, all other women, they have come to associate sex exclusively with the thought of other men. Consequently their excessive mother-love remains sexless and carries with it no reproach."
Here is one example offered by Dr. Karpman: "A patient with an unconscious incestuous attachment to his mother and a conscious incestuous attachment to his sister, with whom at the age of ten he had mutual exhibitionistic episodes, and at the age of sixteen, episodes involving the imitation of intercourse, became completely unable to achieve a normal sexual adjustment and substituted exhibitionistic activity for normal sexual relations.
"Another patient as a child engaged in various sexual familiarities with his mother while she slept, and once saw his father exhibiting his penis to his mother. His own unconscious wish was to exhibit his penis before his mother, and in this case also exhibitionistic activity became a substitute for normal sexual relations.
Inasmuch as incest is so taboo, much contact escapes public or even medical notice. "Taboo against incest is so strong that only a few of those who have experienced intimacies with immediate relatives are willing to acknowledge them," says George W. Henry, M. D., in All the Sexes. "In half of the United States the marriage of first cousins is illegal and in one state the prohibition against consanguineous marriage is extended to include second cousins. Among many ancient peoples incest was a common practice, but since the beginning of modern religions it has been vigorously condemned.
"Incestuous relations continue in spite of deep-seated fear of the probably consequences. They are not uncommon in childhood. Few persons have escaped throughts of or desire for such intimacies; the close association of siblings and of parents and children contributes to such desires."
The custom is not new. We find examples of incest in primitive legends. Greek mythology claims that Heras was both the sister of Zeus as well as his wife. The egyptian deities, Osiris and Isis-children of the earth and sky-were brother and sister and also husband and wife. Roumanian mythology tells of the marriage between the sun and his sister, Sanziana. As punishment, she was cast into the ocean and transformed into the moon. An outraged voice declared that while the two could look at each other from a distance, they could never again meet.
The most famous myth of incest concerns that of Oedipus who was said to have married his own mother. When the truth came out, Oedipus was so upset, he blinded himself while his wife-mother killed herself by hanging.
The Athenian tragic-poet, Sophocles (495-406 B.C.) wrote a play called Oedipus which is the basis of several other Greek tragedies. This particular play is concerned with the incestuous relationship between young Oedipus, son of Liaus, king of Thebes, the ancient capital of Upper Egypt, and his mother Jocasta.
The legend relates that King Laous, third in descent from Cadmus, was married to a queen who was also his cousin, indicative of still more incest. During the early reign, King Laius paid a visit to the oracle at Delphi where the high priestess told him that a warning was in store for him; the warning came from Apollo, the Greek god of Truth. Apollo had issued a prophecy that Laius would be killed by his own son. Hearing this, the king became terrified and set out to change the prophecy.
When young Oedipus' was born, the king arranged for his heir to be kidnapped, taken to a lonely mountain, shackled and left to die by the elements. After this was done, King Laius returned to Thebes, relieved and confident that he would not be killed by his son. (Years later, the king is killed, never realizing that Apollo's prophecy was fulfilled and that the truths of the oracle cannot be denied or altered.)
Meanwhile, young Oedipus was saved, taken to Corinth, a fortress city in Argolis, Greece. Here, according to another oracle, he was said to be the son of the King, Polybus. Since he was the new prince, he was raised in the palace, living the life of royalty. Oedipus made frequent visits to the oracle and was told that he, too, would kill his father. Not wishing this to happen, Prince Oedipus decided to leave home and never again see King Polybus whom he thought to be his real father. He wandered about the country and eventually came to Thebes.
During this era, the entire nation was under siege by a frightful monster, the Sphinx. This abominable creature was shaped like a winged lion, but had the face and breasts of a female. It would waylay all those who came to the city, putting forth a riddle. If the person answered, he was set free. If he could not solve the riddle, he was slain. The seven great gates of Thebes remained closed since the Sphinx might otherwise enter. Famine was rampant.
In the midst of all this, young Oedipus was challenged by the Sphinx who put to him the riddle: "What creature goes on four feet in the morning, on two at noonday, on three in the evening?"
Oedipus thought quickly and replied, "Man.. In childhood he creeps on hands and feet; in manhood he walks erect. In old age he aids himself with a staff."
The answer was correct. The Sphinx immediately killed itself and Thebes was saved. Oedipus was celebrated as the new king. He then married the wife of the dead king, namely Queen Jocasta-unaware that she was his mother. In this manner, the two of them lived in an incestuous relationship, but not with their knowledge.
At this point, it appeared that Apollo's prophecy would be false.
The two had children. Many years later, Thebes became the victim of a plague. Disaster struck. People died. Flocks and herds as well as vegetation all were destroyed. If anyone was spared immunity from disease, death was imminent by starvation. King Oedipus was desperate. He loved his people and wanted to save them.
He sent Jocasta's brother, Creon, to Delphi to ask for the gods' help. Creon returned with good news. He had spoken to Apollo who said the plague would be ended but on one condition--whoever had murdered King Laius would have to be punished. This was good news to Oedipus. He decided to seek out the killer, even though many years had passed.
He called for Teiresias, the aged sightless prophet who was the most revered and respected of all Thebans. Could he name the killer? At first, the man refused to answer and only after pressure did he make the declaration, "You are yourself the murderer you seek."
This shocked Oedipus. He decided that the old man was mad, ordered him banished from his sight. Queen Jocasta was likewise infuriated at such an assertion. She then told Oedipus about the prophecy given to Laius that he would be killed by his own son. To avoid this, they both conspired to dispose of the son that was soon born to them. "As for Laius, he was killed by robbers at the intersection where three roads meet on the way to Delphi. Now you can see that the oracle is false."
Oedipus looked at her carefully. "When did this happen?"
"Just before you came to Thebes," explained the Queen. "Laius went out with four men--all of them were killed except one." This remaining survivor was sent for to tell the story.
Now the truth came out. Oedipus told his wife that he was not the son of Polybus--the same oracle had told him that he would kill his father, marry his mother, have children who would hate him. He related how, on his way from Delphi, at the juncture where three roads join, he came upon a man with four aides. The man tried to force Oedipus from the path, "hitting me with his stick. This angered me. I fell upon them, killing them--except one man. Could it be that Laius was their leader and I killed him?"
Jocasta refused to accept this. "The one man left alive told of a band of robbers. Laius was killed by robbers-not by his son who died in infancy on the mountains."
At this time, a messenger from Corinth appeared to inform Oedipus that King Polybus was dead. When Jocasta heard this, she smiled and said, "You see, Oedipus, the oracle was wrong. It prophesied that Polybus would be slain by his son. You are his son, but you did not kill him."
Hearing the conversation, the messenger intervened with: "Ah, King, you had nothing to fear in fleeing Corinth, thinking you would slay your father. Polybus is not your father; he brought you up as though you belonged to him. It was I who found you-brought to me by a wandering shepherd who was the servant of Laius."
This news was shocking to both Oedipus and Jocasta. In the midst of all this confusion, an aged man made his appearance, introduced himself as the wandering shepherd who was given the baby Oedipus by Jocasta who begged him not to slay the child but let him live.
Now the whole truth was out. The oracle at Delphi was fulfilled. On his road journey, Oedipus had killed the man who challenged him. That man was his father. He came into Thebes, saved the city from the Sphinx, married the dead king's wife who was also his own mother. The damage had been done. A terrible curse was upon all of them.
Jocasta fled from the throne room. Throughout the palace, Oedipus tried to find the wife that was also his mother. He eventually went to her chamber to make a discovery-she was hanging from a rope, dead by self-hanging. Seeing this, Oedipus blinded himself, wishing no more to see or live.
This tragedy ends with Sophocles stating, "The black world of blindness was a refuge; better to be there than to see with strange shamed eyes the old world that had been so bright."
This legend provides the name of Oedipus Complex, so phrased to describe an individual who has a sexual interest toward his mother. The interest may be active or passive.
Another incest myth concerns that of Electra. The tragic poet-author was Aeschylus, living in Greece (525-450 B.C.). His greatest creation is the Oresteia, a three play complation. One of the plays tells the story of Agamemnon, a Greek general, slain by his wife's lover, Aegisthus. The son, Orestes, was taunted by his sister, Electra, to avenge their father's death. Orestes succeeds in killing his mother as well as her lover. This legend has created the "electra complex" term which describes a girl who has a strong father-attachment and mother-hatred. Orestes' mother was named Clytemnestra.
Despite the Grecian addiction for so-called abnormal sex acts, they abhorred incest. From Isaeus, an Attic orator and rhetorician, reputed instructor of Demosthenes, who lived from 420-348 B.C., we discover that weddings between ascendants and descendants were taboo; marriage between brothers and sisters were also forbidden. In later decades, it could be tolerated provided that the two had different mothers.
Even though, marriage between related persons was regarded with horror. There are many instances where convention was done away with. One legend deals with Caunus who loved his sister, Byblis.
Euripides (480-406 B.C.) is credited with authorship of Aeolus. Portions were destroyed but we know of an incest story based upon the narrative of Sostratus. King Aeolus had six daughters and six sons, the eldest of whom, Macareus, was in love with his sister Canace who was forced to have sex with him.
The father heard of it, sent the daughter a sword with which she killed herself. Her brother-lover used the same sword to end his life. The drama contained one pungent line: "For nothing is dishonorable or common, if only it pleases us." Hearing this, the audience was in an uproar in the theatre. This was an outrageous toleration of incest. They forced Anthisthenes to change the verse to read: "Dishonorable remains dishonorable, whether it pleases or not."
Another Greek legend tells of Harpalyce who is raped by her father and is revenged upon. Aristophanes, in Wasps, tells of Cardopion who had an incestuous relationship with his mother. These may be myths but it it is reasonable to aver that many actual cases of incest did exist in Greek life and these tales were taken from true cases.
The indisputed incest among ancient Egyptains is well known. King Ptolemy II (285-247 B.C.) after marrying Arsinoe, his own sister, took the surname of Philadelphus. As a means of keeping the dowry in the family, the law maintained that the hereditary daughter-i.e., a girl to whom the property of her parents exclusively fell, was obliged to marry whatever next of kin was available and still unmarried.
This may have helped establish Egyptain women in a ruling power. Egyptain history is filled with powerful queens. The first queens were Neit-Hetep, wife of Menes, and Mert-Ncit, wife of Usaphais. They were princesses from the Delta and brought dowries of fertile land to their husbands. The land was more precious to rulers than anything else. Egypt is credited with having set the example of a political marriage.
Dr. Gilbert V. Hamilton, author of Incest and Homosexuality, learned that many female homosexuals (lesbians) displayed very strong emotional attachments to a brother or father. Many such girls said they had been raped by an older brother and this caused an escape from normal love into female homosexuality.
The same could apply to young men who found themselves involved with their sisters in an incestuous act and made a flight into homosexuality; thus, they rejected all women and rejected incest at the same time.
Incest is frequently to blame for prostitution. Dr. Harold Greenwald, noted author of The Call Girl, maintains that willful prostitution is an attempt to act out incest phantasies. He cites the case of Georgia. At the age of 12, she and her mother, accompanied by her stepfather (the 5th marriage for the mother) were taking a motor trip. The girl's mother was driving. Gloria was in the back seat, beside her father. After a while, the girl dozed off; whe awakened when she felt her stepfather fondling her. This was just one incident. He later sought to copulate with her. When Gloria's mother discovered this unnatural attitude, she hastily divorced the man.
"Here was a symbolic incest attempt," explains Dr. Greenwald. "While the man was not Georgia's biological father he was her mother's husband, and to a child of that age this would evoke the same feeling of incest. In her fantasies, she often saw herself in a harem where she was the newest addition; she wanted desperately to please the sultan so that he would prefer her to others. Another of Gloria's fantasies was to be taken sexually against her will."
It is interpreted that this fantasy represents a displaced wish-fulfillment. A harem's sultan can possess many females. "Thus, Georgia could share the father figure with her mother and not feel guilty. Similarly, if she were taken against her will, the guilt would not be hers. The problem was to find the relationship between the first incestual approach, the fantasy and her career as call girl."
When asked if she would feel odd about having intimacies with her father, the girl made a rather surprising answer, "No. I thinks he wants to, and his money is as good as anyone's."
Dr. Greenwald offers this comment, "Being a call girl, Georgia seemed to say, gave her permission to have incestuous relations with her father. This fantasy also explains one of the unconscious functions of the fee. By obtaining a fee, she seemed to feel that she had transformed the pleasurable relationship to a work relationship."
There is much incest in our current era. Walter Bromberg in Crim and the Mind explains, "More cases occur than are brought to court. Incest between father and daughter is most frequent; even more common are relations between father and step-daughter."
Dr. Manfred S. Guttmacher, in Sex Offenses, makes this observation. "Statutory rape and incest show a high correlation with the culture level of the social group. In lower socio-economic levels, incest is more common than is thought. Many cases do not come to the attention of the police. Brother-sister incest is most common. Mother-son relations are rare, father-daughter relations are more common."
The very act of incest requires it to be very discreet and under cover; if a situation is exposed, it is usually due to a certain problem arousing out of the relationship. For example, a daughter who is repelled about it, will confess about her father's attempts to violate her to the mother who then takes action. Or, a girl becomes pregnant and now the truth cannot be hidden-her own father is named as the man responsible for her "aborning" child. There are times when neighbors or relatives hear about incest and they promptly notify the authorities. There are situations when a doctor hears of it and his aid is enlisted.
Incest is an abnormal type of behavior that can be easily concealed and there are many cases that are never reported; even if the authorities are notified, the charge is disguised as "contributing to the deliquency of a minor" or "rape" which does not take into consideration the possibility that both partners were willing.
S. Kirson Weinberg, M.D. in Incest Behavior, tells of 203 cases of incest. The doctor found that these four combinations existed among the incest-practicing cases: 159 were father and daughter; 37 were brother and sister; 2 were mother and son; 5 were father and daughter as well as brother and sister.
Were these people of a depressed economic status? 5.9% were comfortable. 19.2% were middle-class. 55% were lower class.
The average father was 43.5 years. The average daughter was 15.3. Brothers were about 24 and the sisters with whom they had sex were about 19.3 years old, on an average.
As for intellectual status, the average father had 5 years of formal schooling. 14% had no education and were illiterate. 81.7% received between one and eight years of schooling. 4.3% had high school education. None of them went to college.
As for brothers who had incestuous affairs with their sisters, they were reported to have received more education than their fathers. The daughters concerned showed that 69.1% were in the 5th through 8th grade stage.
64.3% of the fathers were either dull or below normal intelligence. 26.5% had average intelligence. 9.2% were of above average intelligence.
These figures tell us that incest occurs in families of good education and background as well as less fortunate families.
Incest taboo laws are man-made; that is, they are not contrary to nature or instinct and this creates a problem. Dr. Ashley Montagu is Man: His First Million Years, declares, "The origin of the incest prohibition has puzzled anthropologists for many years, and there, have been many theories. The most widely accepted is that incest was an artificially created dislike designed to encourage marriages outside the group. It is assumed that the prohibition is very ancient, and that what it was designed to achieve was to place members of one's own group in that of a neighboring group to act, as it were, as ambassadors."
Speaking psychiatrically, the responsible factors center on the Oedipus complex theory. Formulated by Freud (General Introduction to Psycho-analysis), he said, "The first choice of object of mankind is regularly an incestuous one, directed to the mother and sister of men, and the most stringent prohibitions are required to prevent this sustained infantile tendency from being carried into effect."
Social workers report that incest, rather, the urge for incest, may rear itself in areas where poor living conditions and crowded housing dominates. This is understood when we note that in conditions of impoverishment, groups must sleep together-i.e., father and daughter, brothers and sisters are put together. A lack of privacy leads to exposure of sex organs and interest is stimulated.
In other situations, a father or brother drink too much; under the influence of alcohol, they violate daughters, sisters, as well as any other accessible relation. Freud found that the abnormal tensions and twisted urges of the psychotic and neurotic are to blame for incest.
When apprehended, confinement in prison is generally recommended. This is not necessarily a cure, but it appears to be a wise course of action when combined with competent psychiatric treatment. Whether it will be successful is something much too individualized to predict. It must be remembered that incest does not violate biological law--only man-made law. This is the root of the incest compulsion.
Drs. Eberhard and Phyllis Kronhausen, co-authors of Pornography and The Law, have these comments to make: "For the present, nobody is able to quote meaningful figures on the prevalence of incestuous sex activities in the American community. By methods of indirect proof, one can only arrive at the conclusion that it is not nearly as uncommon as is usually assumed. One of the few statistical datum which we do have on the matter does originate in the Kinsey studies. From this source we learn that approximately 16% of all sexual approaches by adult males toward pre-adolescent girls were made by relatives, among whom uncles were the most conspicuous single source of contact."
Dr. Weinberg points out that at one time, in Chicago, out of 72 cases of female delinquency brought to Juvenile Court 32% were charged with incestuous affairs with their own fathers.
Dr. Kronhausen emphasizes, "It also appears, from the clinical experience of psychoanalysts, working mostly with individuals from the highest socio-economic levels of society, that incest behavior of one kind or another (for example, fondling, 'sexy' kissing, manipulation of the genitals, petting, and in some instances, complete coitus) is frequently present in the histories of uper-class individuals."
Numerous authors have also talked about incest in themes of their writings. Thomas Mann's novel, The Holy Sinners and his short story, Blood of the Wolsungs, deal with this abnormal behavior. Shakespeare's drama also alude to incest. His famed Antony and Cleopatra is well-known for this theme. Schiller's Don Carlos is also based upon the incest theme.
Freud established the hypothesis that all children in infancy, display a strong Oedipus and Electra complex-strong attachment for mother and father. This complex diminishes and at about the age of six, it disappears. If it still remains, it is regarded as "fixed", tending to alter the normal development of the libido. Much of the sexual response remains in this so-called infantile pattern and is carried over into maturity in a predominant urge.
This understanding is offered by D. Mercer in They Walk in Shadow, "Sometimes, particularly when a father and daughter are involved, the act of incest may be accompanied by sadistic or masochistic manifestations. Sexual intercourse between brother and sister may range from simple animal lust induced by propinquity to the most tender and sentimental devotion.
"In one such case involving mother and son, the son was plainly a degenerate type. The mother's somewhat unwilling participation, accompanied by a strong feeling of guilt, was induced by the exaggerated fear of losing the son's interest and attention.
Mr. Mercer emphasizes, "Inter-family rape is a more or less commonplace happening which may there-after result in a completely mutual relationship prolonged, sometimes, over a term of years. The seduction of a daughter by the father is always apparently, 'statutory rape' when such a case appears in the courts; the participation of the daughter is seldom the result of forcible seizure."
One cited case concerns a father who had an illicit relationship with his 9-year old daughter. They continued sex until she was 17 with her complete approval. At this time, she fell in love with a young man and the truth about the incestuous relationship was revealed. The young boy friend sought out legal help. The offending father was charged in incest, sentenced to prison for ten to twenty years!
A contrasting case concerns a 16 year old daughter who functioned as mistress to her father. Somehow, the mother found out, sued for divorce. The daughter refused to appear as a witness against the father which meant that there could be no prosecution for incest.
The parents parted. The girl left for a distant state where she took up residence and established a home. In due time, her father joined her. Both took assumed names and new identities. To all outward appearances, they had met as strangers. They married and since then are living as husband and wife.
J. D. Mercer asks, "Is sexual contact between brothers, mutual masturbation or some alternate experimental technique being employed, to be considered as incestuouses relation? Is it necessarily evidence of any homosexual predisposition? The adopted classifications have little to say about this, or about any other adolescent or imitative procedure involving a groups of boys, not at all rare in the history of the sexual initiate."
Louis S. London, M. D., in his classic Sexual Deviations, tells of a young man who participated in sexual relationships with his own sister when little more than a young boy. During childhood, the two had sex play. In puberty, his sister (five years his senior) lured him into actual coitus.
The young man said, "When I was small, between ages of 3 and 6, I used to sleep in the same bed with my sister. After the age of 6, I had my own bedroom. At the age of 6, I indulged in sexual play with my sister. She was about 11. She asked me to fool with her. I fondled her between the legs with my finger. We played this way frequently.
"At the age of 15, I had my first sexual intercourse with my sister. She was 20. She was in her room, lying on her bed nude. There was no one else in the house. She called me into her room and told me to play with her breasts. She then induced me to get on top of her and put my penis into her vagina. I ejaculated, but withdrew in time. I had intercourse with her four different times and once I ejaculated into her vagina. The last time I had sexual intercourse with my sister was at the age of 20."
Under analysis, this young man displayed overt homosexual desires which found escape into incestuous relationships with his sister. During active homosexual participations, he preferred that of fellatio, adopting the aggressive role, by receiving the partner's erect phallus within his oral cavity and by means of friction, inducing the partner's orgasm. There were times when he sought to simulate the feminine role-that is, having his partner insert the erect appendage into his anus which became a vagina, to so speak.
Dr. London relates that this young man admitted having homosexual relations with a fellow office worker who then had coitus with his sister while he waited in the adjoining room. Dr. London's analysis: "Receiving orally the penis of a man who inserted the same penis into his sister's vagina, can be construed as a vicarious form of sexual relations with his sister at the fantasy level.
"This is in keeping with what actually took place with his sister in earlier years. Apparently he is masochistic by nature as his desire is to please his sexual partner rather than to be gratified himself."
Considering the existence of the mother and father complexes, caution must be exercised to prevent ignition of the incest urge. How many psychological attitudes in the home be improved? Dr. O. Spurgeon English suggested this plan in Sex and Human Love:
1. The child should have warmth from the mother. With the warmth, the mother should combine affection so that the male in particular has memories of pleasant experiences with women and will want to re-establish ties of intimacy with women later in life.
2. He should have a sexual enlightenment free of taboos or disgust in relation to heterosexual union.
3. He should have the interest of a man during his growth, so that he identifies himself with masculine attitudes particularly those pertaining to responsibility and home formation, including a satisfaction in parent-hood. The first and second rules apply for women. Third, she should have from early life the warm interest of a man so that she feels a kinship with the life of a man.
It is known that in numerous family situations, the father ignores the daughter or regards her as rof less interest than he would a boy. It is no surprise that some women cannot like men or get along with them. If a girl is raised in an environment lacking a balanced affection from both parents, her entire sexual outlook may become warped.
The value of this intelligent norm of behavior is increased by Dr. Manfred S. Guttmacher's comment in Sex Offenses:
"It should be added to Dr. English's admonitions that there is the danger from the parent, often getting too little emotional satisfaction from life, who puts too much, and often the wrong kind, of emotional investment in the child. As Freud put it, 'Excessive parental tenderness surely becomes harmful because it accelerates sexual maturity and also because it spoils the child and makes him unfit to renounce love temporarily or to be satisfied with a smaller amount of love."
"This factor of overprotection accounts in part for the great numbers of emotionally immature and dependent persons that we have in our society."
Dr. Guttmacher noticed that these individuals cannot acquire sexual maturity; he urges parents to avoid mentally seducing their offspring. "They create an Oedipal type of conflict that in most cases is never satisfactorily resolved and which results in permanent emotional and sexual crippling."
CHAPTER TWO
I remember I was almost twelve years old, one man recalled during an interview, when my Aunt Lena came to live with us. She was my mother's sister who'd been living back East, come out to Frisco for a visit. She was a few years older than my mother, in her mid-thirties I guess, not bad looking but obviously heading toward spinsterhood. I didn't think about it then, but now I had the feeling that she didn't date much and probably she never had a man-sexually, I mean.
As for me, I was getting pretty damned sexy. I had my pecker in my hand at least once a day, jerking off, like I'd been doing for at least six months. Most times I'd do it in the bathroom, where I could pull off into a piece of toilet paper and flush the evidence down the drain right away. If my parents suspected what I was doing in there so long, they didn't say anything. I think they thought I had a couple more years before puberty and wasn't interested in sex.
I never asked them any questions about sex. I got all my information from older boys. Some of them even had pictures which showed a girl with her titties bare and her legs open so I could see the hole up between her legs. The hole was called a "snatch" the older boys informed me with their advanced knowledge, and that's the place a guy shoved his pecker when it got stiff. I wanted to get some pictures like that for my own, but nobody seemed to know where to get them. I wanted to borrow them, too, but the boys that had them wouldn't let them out of their sight. Not that I blamed them. Every time I looked at them, my pecker got stiff and hard. So when I got into the bathroom, I'd close my eyes and concentrate to remember all the details of the pictures.
Except one time I forgot to lock the door, and Aunt Lena walked in. I was really going to town. My pecker was up good and hard and my fist was busy jerking it up and down, and at first I didn't realize the door had opened. Then I opened my eyes and saw the woman standing there, staring at me-not at me, exactly, but at part of me, the stiff pecker standing up in front of me, throbbing in my hand. Quickly, I put my other hand over in front of it to hide what I was doing, and that seemed to break her trance. She moved away with an apology and closed the door behind her.
A cold sweat broke out on my body. Suppose Aunt Lena told my parents what I was doing. I didn't mind being punished, really, but they might keep a close eye on me to see that I didn't keep doing it. And I sure as hell wanted to keep pulling my pecker, because I enjoyed it so much. I was completely out of the mood now, but I delayed going out of the bathroom, afraid of what I'd have to face out in the house. I knew I should keep jerking off, or else I'd have cramps, but the bathroom door was still unlocked and I half-expected my father to come barging in to give me hell.
Instead, I just got up, pulled up my underwear and my trousers and flushed the toilet. My pecker was still stiff under my clothes, and the bulge stood out. I washed my face and hands a couple of times until the stiffness went down. But when I went outside the bathroom, nobody said anything about what had happened, so I guessed Aunt Lena had been too embarrassed to mention what she'd seen. Then, my aunt was so calm and so friendly, I began to wonder if she'd seen anything at all-except me sitting on the toilet seat. Thinking that, I began to feel much better about it all.
It was after dinner, while we were all sitting in the living room watching television that I began wishing that Aunt Lena had actually seen my jerking off my pecker. There was something incredibly sexy about having a female watch you do it. I remember when I was younger, the boys and the girls used to show each other what they had, but while it seemed naughty, it wasn't really stimulating. Now that we were older and knew what it was all about, the girls wouldn't do it anymore. A couple of the boys had sisters, and they delighted in telling us how they'd peek in on their sisters while the girls were undressing or taking a bath. I envied them, and I wished I had a sister I could see naked. The thought of that made my pecker start up again, and I had to cross my legs to keep the bulge in my trousers from showing.
I tried to think of something else. The television program was dull, but my parents were sitting on the couch watching it. Across from me, my Aunt Lena was sitting in a chair, reading a magazine, Her skirt was pulled up above her knees, and it was the fist time I'd noticed that she legs at all, and very shapely legs at that. I tried to look away, but I couldn't. Her bare legs fascinated me, and I began wondering how it would feel to take out my pecker and inch it up along those legs, forcing them apart, and shoving myself up deeper along her thighs to the spot where her snatch was.
Well, you can imagine what effect those thoughts did to my pecker. Before I knew it, it had gotten stiff again, and it was pressing and throbbing against the cloth of my underwear and trousers, and I was afraid I was going to let go any second. I looked up guiltily, but Aunt Lena was engrossed in her magazine and paying me no attention. My parents were still watching the television program. When I looked back at Aunt Lena, I noticed a subtle change in her-her legs were spread, ever so slightly.
I caught my breath and stared. I wet my lips. I could feel my heart pound wildly. I could see right up between her legs, along the white thighs, straight into her crotch, where her white panties were snugged right into the crack of her cunt. I could even see wisps of pubic hair around the edges of the thin panties.
I started trembling, and I was afraid I was going to come right then and there in front of everybody. Then I got the shock of my life. Aunt Lena looked up from her magazine, smiled at me, and opened her legs even wider!
I could see everything she had. Sure, she was wearing panties, but they were pulled tight into her crotch, and when she spread her legs they pulled even tighter over the crack, outlining it in exquisite detail, and some wiry black pubic hairs sprang out along either side.
It was a lost cause trying to hold back then. I was already too far gone, and the sight of that crotch was too much for me. I groaned as my stiff pecker lurched up against my trousers and began throbbing and spurting away like crazy. My father hadn't noticed, but my mother asked me if I was okay, and I gave her a big smile and said yes. When I looked back at Aunt Lena, her legs had moved together and she was intent on her magazine. Funny. I could have sworn she'd opened her legs on purpose so I could see right up into her crotch. But I couldn't figure out why a nice woman like her, and a relative of mine as well, would do something like that. After awhile, I decided the exposure had been accidental.
Meanwhile, I had a soggy set of underwear to contend with. I waited until my pecker had gone down, then got up and walked hurriedly into the bathroom. The front of my trousers were starting to show the wetness, so after I'd mopped up the mess with some toilet paper, I went into my bedroom and changed.
Nothing much happened the rest of the evening, but when I was in bed that night, I started playing with myself and thinking about the glorious sight I'd seen. Needless to say, my pecker went up stiff and hard while I envisioned Aunt Lena sitting opposite me with her legs wide, showing me the insides of her legs and her pantied crotch, with her hair and cunt outlined like it was etched on the cloth....
My father worked during the daytime, which was when my mother liked to do her shopping. I made a third discovery the next day when I went home during the noon hour for the school lunch I'd forgotten to take with me that morning-Aunt Lena liked to sleep late. I let myself in the house and walked through, looking for signs of life. I found more than I was looking for in the den, where Aunt Lena was stretched out asleep on top of the rollaway bed, with her nightgown pulled up around her waist and her naked legs spread.
I stopped dead in the hallway and just stared. Her hair was splayed out over the pillow, and her eyes were closed. Her breasts rose and fell under the skimpy covering as she breathed. But it was down between her legs that held my attention. Underneath the black hair I could see on her what I'd seen on those pictures the boys had shown me-her cunt, which looked like a giant pair of lips between her legs. I remembered thinking how nice it would be to kiss those lips.
That thought shook me out of my trance, and I realized that my pecker was up good and hard. I held my breath and wondered if I dared jerk off in front of Aunt Lena while she was asleep. I knew I sure as hell wanted to. I also knew that another opportunity like this might not come again very soon, it at all.
Before I could talk myself out of it, I unzipped my fly and took out my pecker and began pulling on it. It got bigger and harder then I'd ever remembered, and I was really enjoying it. Hell, those other guys just had a picture to look at-I had me a real live woman! The fact that she was an aunt of mine didn't bother me. Like I said, she'd been living back East all this time, so it was as though she was a stranger.
So there I was in the doorway to the den, pounding away on my stiff pecker while I stared at Aunt Lena's wide-open cunt. Then I glanced up at her face to make sure she wasn't waking up-and suddenly her eyes were wide open, and she was smiling at me!
My pecker was stiff and throbbing so much it didn't register at first in my brain. Then, I stopped, embarrassed, and fumbled with my fly, wondering what in the devil I could say to explain what I was doing. But Aunt Lena only began laughing and motioning me to come into the room. She didn't even try to put her legs together or cover herself up.
Suddenly her voice penetrated my numb brain. She told me not to be embarrassed that she understood how I felt. She said I was getting to be quite a man and she was pleased that I found her so attractive.
"You do think I'm attractive, don't you?" she asked me.
I nodded, gulped, and found my voice. "Yes," I told her. I tried not to look at that spot between her legs, but my eyes kept being drawn to it.
She said, "Then come over here and get a better look at it."
Like someone in a hypnotic trance, I moved into the den toward the bed. It was funny. I still had my fly open, and my pecker was still standing up stiff and hard in front of me. Aunt Lena patted the mattress beside her and told me to sit down. I sat down. She asked me if I'd ever seen a woman like that before, and I told her no, only in pictures. She asked me if I'd like to see all of her, and I nodded. That's when she lifted her nightgown up over her head, took it off, and threw it aside.
Her breasts were small, like apples, and they juggled when she moved. I stared at them, and she asked me if I'd like to suck on them. Before I could answer, she took my head in her hands and guided me toward her breasts. My heart was pounding like crazy, and I couldn't think straight. My mouth opened and took in one of her nipples, which got hard and stiff, like a little pecker, inside my mouth. Aunt Lena kept moaning and stroking the back of my head and neck. After awhile she pushed me away and asked me if I thought she had nice breasts. I said yes. She smiled and asked me if I thought she had a nice cunt, and I hesitated but said yes. It surprised me that she'd use the word "cunt" like that, but that's just what she said.
Then she surprised me again by asking me if I'd like to kiss her pretty cunt. I guess I just stared at her for a minute, wondering if I'd heard correctly. Then she laughed and said that she had lips down there between her legs that were very nice for kissing. I'd noticed they looked something like lips, but I'd never thought of actually kissing them. The whole conversation was pretty embarrassing, and I stammered a lot, not knowing what to say to her.
"Is there something else you'd like to do to me?" she asked.
I nodded and said, "I'd like to stick my pecker up inside you." I was surprised how easy it was to say-just like that.
She grabbed me and hugged me. She said she'd like nothing better, but it wouldn't be right because she was my aunt and I was her nephew. Besides, she said, she might get pregnant, and she couldn't have that. Disappointment must've shown on my face, because she said she could do something even better to me.
She made me stretch out on the bed beside her, and she turned her body around so she was facing my stiff pecker. She took my pecker in one hand and caressed it, while the other hand gently massaged my balls. She said I was a real big boy, and someday I'd make a girl of my own scream her head off with pleasure.
Well, right then and there I wanted to scream my own head off with pleasure. I'd never had anybody take hold of my pecker and work it over, and I knew then I'd been missing plenty. It was standing up so straight and still and throbbing away like crazy I thought I'd raise right up off the bed.
As I watched, Aunt Lena's head got closer and closer to the tip of my pecker. She wet her lips, and I held my breath as her tongue almost touched the end of it. Then she edged closer and planted a wet kiss right on the top. A shudder ran up and down my body, and I wanted desperately for her to do it again. An instant later, she did it again, with the same results. Right on the tip of my pecker, a few drops of moisture had collected around the hole, and her tongue slid out from between her lips and touched the moisture, licking it up.
It was an experience I'll never forget. I still have wet dreams about it sometimes.
I thought even then that she was purposely trying to get me very excited. And she was succeeding, you can be sure of that. She started nibbling on the end of my pecker, using her sharp teeth to nip at me like a hungry animal. Then she opened up her mouth wide and took the end of it between her lips and began sucking on it. I began trembling all over, and I knew it wouldn't be long before I came. But I wanted it to last longer, so I tried my best to hold off.
She moved her body across mine, forcing me flat on my back, while her mouth opened up and swallowed all of my pecker, right down to the balls which she played with in her hand. Her head moved up and down, up and down on me, with her lips pressed tightly all around the shaft of my pecker. It was the sexiest thing that could ever happen to me, I thought. And I was sure of it when I noticed that with her legs straddling my face, her cunt was suspended just a few inches above my nose.
I stared at her cunt wonderingly for a moment. I'd never expected to see one up so close, and I was surprised to see that the quivering, moist folds of flesh still resembled a pair of lips. I recalled her asking me if I wanted to kiss them-and now, suddenly, I had the urge to do just that.
I reached up to grasp her buttocks and raised my head slightly to plant a wet kiss on those hairy lips. It tasted funny, sort of damp and salty-but very pleasant. And her body shuddered with the contact. Her lips left my pecker long enough for her to gasp, "That's it! Do it again. Kiss it! Lick it! Stick your tongue deep inside me!
She was giving me such a good time I couldn't refuse if I'd wanted to. And I didn't want to. I had the feeling that I was going through an experience denied most boys, something that might never happen again, and I wanted to make the most of the moment.
So I kissed her there between her legs. I licked her cunt. I stuck my tongue deep inside her. She began shuddering and rolling around on top of me so much I had to hold onto her to keep her steady. And I felt myself coming, big and strong, the way I usually felt it coming from way down deep inside me sometimes when I hadn't masturbated in a couple of days. She took her mouth off me just before I began spurting, but her lips worked all up and down the length of my pecker while it throbbed and shot streams of white stuff all over the bed.
When it was over, I just collapsed, tired but happy, on the bed, hoping none of the stuff had gotten on my trousers. Aunt Lena rolled off me and sat up on the bed. She smiled and patted my limp pecker and asked me if I'd enjoyed it. I said yes, but I was beginning to feel a little-well, strange, about what had happened. Way back in my mind I'd been thinking, wow, wouldn't it be swell to tell the other guys about it. Then I knew they wouldn't believe me. After all, how come it hadn't happened to them, since they had aunts and other relatives who lived with them?
I knew I couldn't tell them anyway, because Aunt Lena started warning me not to-not to tell anybody, not my best friends, and especially not my father or my mother. They wouldn't understand, as she said. I wasn't sure I did. I had a few feelings of guilt, but my excitement had overwhelmed them; not the feelings returned, and there was no passion to cloud the obvious fact that what Aunt Lena and I had done was very wrong.
Wrong or not, the man confided, "a stiff pecker, as the saying goes, hasn't any conscience. Needless to say, Aunt Lena and I did it again. There were many a lunch hour after that first session, where I ate something a hell of a lot more interesting than peanut butter and jelly sandwiches." He chuckled. "Besides being nonfattening, Aunt Lena didn't stick to the roof of my mouth!"
Despite his obvious attempt to make light of the situation, it seemed clear that the man was troubled by his behavior, both when he was a boy experiencing the mouth-genital contacts and when he was telling of it. He recounted in some detail his further adventures with his aunt, which were repetitions, for the most part, of his initial encounter. He was at age twelve unconsciously aware of the Judeo-Christian taboo, not only against oral sexuality but against sexual behavior between relatives. His growing shame and guilt feelings were further strengthened by his aunt's understandable insistence on secrecy.
Authorities in the field, among the Indiana University Institute for Sex Research, have noted that in the case of sex offenses involving minors, secrecy depends largely upon the ability of the minor to keep quiet about the sexual escapade, especially if the behavior is a one-time affair or if it is repeated infrequently. If the sexual behavior is repeated often, this of course increases chances of discovery by someone not participating in the act.
In the present case history, the subject, though racked by feelings of guilt and shame, managed to subdue these feelings before the onslaught of his passion. After all, he wasn't supposed to masturbate either, but he wasn't giving that up. However, he and his Aunt Lena performed their sexual feats once too often.
My mother was out shopping again, he recalled. As for my father, he never, never, NEVER came home during the daytime-except this one time. Aunt Lena was having her period, so I couldn't kiss her down there, but she was doing it to me. I was lying on her rollaway bed with my fly unzipped and my stiff pecker sticking up inside her mouth. She'd taken off her blouse and bra, and her breasts were hanging free, because once in a while she'd stop sucking on me and bend over to drag her nipples across my pecker, which made me even more excited.
I got a big kick out of watching her lick me all over and take my pecker in her mouth. Sometimes she'd have my pecker in her mouth and use her tongue to push it from one side of her mouth to the other, so her cheeks would alternately bulge on one side and then the other. Once I laughed and told her she looked like a squirrel I'd seen at the zoo. I remember she laughed back at me and said if I didn't behave myself she'd really act like a squirrel and eat up my nuts. I didn't understand that at first. Then I remembered some of the guys referred to their balls as nuts, and I laughed too.
I was about to tell her again that she looked like a squirrel, so I could hear the joke once more-when I looked up in the doorway and saw my father standing there, a look of complete astonishment and disbelief on his white face.
It was the end of the world. I knew that for sure. I panicked. I tried to push Aunt Lena's head away, but she thought I was playing and she held onto my thrashing hips and sucked harder on my pecker. I kept crying out, "No, no, no!" When her eyes glanced up at me, I pointed and managed to say in a hoarse voice, "My father!"
She got the-message. Fear veiled her eyes, her mouth left me, and she stood up, trying to cover her naked breasts as she turned. When she moved, so did my father. By the time she'd turned completely, he was in front of her, his face a mask of fury. His clenched fist leaped out and struck her full on the face. She uttered an outcry and staggered backwards, crashing into the wall, but before she could fall to the floor, my father was in front of her again, fists leaping out to hit her-in the face, on the breasts, in the stomach. Once, he raised his foot and kicked her between her legs.
And all the while he was calling her names-a filthy, rotten slut pervert, a monster doing something like that to an innocent child.
I watched, horrified, as Aunt Lena's face spurted blood, as her pretty little nose twisted, as her lips became bruised. I leaped up and tried to stop him, but he shoved me aside roughly. If my mother hadn't arrived a few seconds before the police, summoned by the neighbors, I think my father would have killed the poor woman.
The aunt's face was disfigured and several bones in her body were broken. The bones healed, but inadequate plastic surgery failed to cover the scars inflicted on her by the irate father. The woman also was indicted on charges of committing an illegal sexual act and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. The father was still angry, but the mother feared the publicity that would ensue, with the result that the charges were finally dropped, although the judge did suggest that perhaps Aunt Lena should consult a competent psychiatrist.
"I felt it was partly my fault," the man said during the interview, "so I refused to testify against her, even though my father threatened to beat me if I didn't. My mother was pretty shocked by what had happened, too-but after all, the woman was her own sister, so she persuaded my father that Aunt Lena had received enough punishment."
Whether or not the punishment was suitable to the crime is not for us to say here, even though a crime was obviously committed. Nevertheless, the man interviewed seemed little the worse for wear as a result of his early experience in oral sex with an older woman. Admittedly, it did influence his sexual preferences, for the main portion of his erotic behavior is and has been centered about oral-genital contacts, either as an end in itself or as a highly important preliminary to vaginal intercourse.
It is interesting to note that the father came from a low socio-economic family, while his wife was raised in a higher income group which in general is more sexually permissive, which explains in part their particular attitudes toward what happened. While some ambivalence is evident in their son, it is fortunate for him that he made a suitable psychological adjustment.
CHAPTER THREE
Case History-of Brother and Sister.
Philip and Rose were initiated into sexual play very early in life. Rose vividly remembered her first experience though it came at the tender age of three, and Philip five at the time.
She was sleeping in her crib when she was awakened by the sound of her fathers voice calling to her and her brother from his bedroom. He was asking them to come to him. Philip, who no longer slept in a crib, got out of his bed, lifted Rose out of her crib and took her hand as they walked to their father's room. Their parents slept in one large bed. They climbed into bed next to their father; their mother was sleeping on the other side, her back to them. After they had been in bed for a few minutes, their father reached over and tapped his wife on her shoulder.
"Come close to me," he whispered.
"You are disgusting. No, I will not come to you while the children are in the room."
He was infuriated at his wife's answer and he reached over and pulled her viciously to him. He pushed her legs apart and drove his penis into her as the two children cowered beneath the covers. She cried and moaned, and then he pulled his organ out of her vagina and shoved it into her mouth. Rose and Philip peered curiously out of the protection of the covers, trying to understand what was happening. They were strangely fascinated by the sight of that large, to them almost gigantic, piece of flesh entering their mother's mouth.
When Mr. L. saw that his children were taking an interest in the proceedings he removed his penis and called to his daughter:
"Rose, come here."
But she was afraid to go to him.
"Why are you afraid? Nothing will happen to you. Come here," he repeated.
Rose very slowly crawled out of the covers. Philip held her hand tightly for a moment to give her courage. She crawled over to her father and nestled close to his powerful naked body. At first his odor frightened her-it was so strong and rank-he smelled like a beast she had seen in a zoo. Her infantile mind had no knowledge of what was in store for her. All she knew was that even though he did not act or smell as he usually did, she was still happy to be with him.
"Come, my child, Move down here. Speak to your friend." He brought the child's face close to his penis.
"Yes, my child," he continued, "you must learn all the delights in the world so that when you grow to maturity you will be worthy of this earth. What do you see:
Rose did not answer her father. She took his penis in her little hands and held it as the flesh stiffened and the blood raced furiously through it.
"You have seen enough. Now you must taste it. You must taste this most priceless gift of all."
Rose was terrified at first. It looked so large and dangerous. He took her gently by the neck and pushed her toward his organ. Her childish mouth, so fresh and sweet, opened wide and his penis slowly entered it.
Mr. L. called out to his wife: "Look-she is doing it. The girl is an angel! We have much to be proud of this night."
Then the child's mouth began to excite him and he moved his member back and forth very gently, so as not to bruise her tender lips. When he had reached the height of excitement he moved the child away and let his semen fall upon the bed. He didn't want to give Rose a bad impression of fellatio by pouring an excess of seed into her mouth.
He spoke bitterly to his wife when it was over:
"You have missed the greatest joy a parent can experience. You have missed the equivalent of Paradise."
And then he fell back onto the bed, overcome by the extreme and ecstatic pleasure he had experienced.
Mrs. L. became jealous. A tidal wave of enraged jealousy engulfed her with such force that she was unable to fight it. She looked about for her son, Philip, but she could not see him. Then she spotted a crumpled form lying under the covers at the other side of the bed, and she called to him. He responded only by peering out and looking at her. She called him again and this time he reluctantly came to her, crawling slowly across the bed and making sure not to bump into his sister or his father.
When he reached almost to his mother he hesitated for a moment, and she pulled him to her. She removed his pajama bottoms swiftly, and felt his little penis. She played with it for a while and Philip giggled as her fingers tickled him.
Then she bent down over him and flicked his penis with her tongue. Philip became frightened and his whole body stiffened. She took his little penis in her mouth and fondled it with her tongue. She was stirred by deep currents of love and passion. Slowly, the boy's body began to relax under his mother's caresses. She felt, for the first time, a bit of activity in his member. Yes, she was sure of it, his penis was beginning to harden. She kissed the tip as it pointed up in the air.
Philip was smiling as his mother finally pushed him away and left his little stiffened organ to his own devices. She did not want to over do the situation.
Mrs. L. admitted to herself that her husband had been right, and the use of the children for certain activities was often justified. Philip in the meanwhile had crawled over to where his sister had fallen asleep and woke her to let her feel his penis. But Rose was too tired to play with it.
As the children grew older they were allowed many other ventures into their parents' bed. And, they discovered each other. As the years passed each one realized that no other person could excite them as much as each other. They would lock the door of their bedroom at night from the inside so that their father could not see them. But they could often hear him outside, panting and masturbating in the dark hallway. In the darkness of their own room they would wrap their arms around each other. Philip caught flies in little glass jars and saved them; he would put honey on his sister's nipples and then place the glass jar over her breast with the fly imprisoned within. Rose would sigh and moan in pleasure as the fly moved up and down her nipple and gently scraped her flesh with its silky feelers.
Rose would excite his still immature penis by placing it in her dainty little mouth. Then she would run to fetch a jar of jam which had hidden in the closet and she would spread the contents liberally on her brother's organ. Rose and her pet dog would then lick off the jam, and the touch of their tongues, especially the harsh, rasping tongue of the dog, made Philip very happy.
When Philip was twelve years old and Rose was ten, their mother decided to separate them, because she had come to think that their relationship was not a healthy one. So they were put into separate rooms. They were both miserable.
One night Philip could no longer stand being apart from his beloved sister. He slipped into Rose's room and they embraced as though they had been separated for years. Philip pushed her gently down on the bed and spread her legs. He knelt down and placed his tongue inside her vagina, and moved it from side to side. It was a fantastically successful reunion. Small moans and gasps of pleasure filled the room all evening. Philip's tongue was a gifted lover, even for a mere child, which he still was. When he tired of that, he brought the dog up on the bed and let it place its tongue into Roses' private parts. The dog's rear legs trembled as his tongue entered the human world.
As they grew older, the siblings' passion for each other continued and became more profound and exotic. The They spent all of their time thinking up various practices to excite each other. They lived for one another's bodies.
Mrs. L. finally decided that her children must be split apart, more or less permanently. She sent them to a series of private schools, going to great lengths to ensure their separation. She even sent them to schools which had vacations at different dates, so that neither would be at home while the other was.
The years passed, and soon the pain of not seeing each other moderated, and their pleas that they could not live without each other turned out to be exaggerations. Rose went to college, married, had a child, and was living in Cape Cod.
But Philip was another case. Since their enforced separation he had become, slowly, a disciplinary problem. In every school and organization, sooner or later there had been trouble. He was ultimately kicked out of a dozen schools and universities.
He drifted from job to job. He bet heavily at the racetrack and was soon in debt to a number of loansharks. In order to free himself of debt, he planned a daring stock swindle, involving stolen securities. The plan was thwarted by the police, however, and Philip was duly tried and found guilty. He was sentenced to three years in the federal penitentiary, and it was only because of numerous letters from influential citizens which his mother had obtained that he received such a short sentence.
When Rose heard of what had happened to her brother she went nearly mad with worry. She telephoned everyone she could think of in an effort to keep Philip from prison, but all her efforts were futile. One thing, however, did materialize from her activities, and that was the sudden realization that her husband no longer held her interest. The sudden concern for her brother had brought back all the delicious memories that had been hiding in the shallow pool of her unconscious mind.
During Philip's first week in jail, Rose did nothing but conjure up wild schemes to help him escape. But of course they all came to nothing. He started working in the laundry room, then went to the shoe factory, and finally they gave him an easy job in the prison library because of his literate background.
There was another young man working in the library named Saul and he was serving a ten year sentence for armed robbery. Saul was thin and pale, and he wore his blond hair as long as the prison authorities would allow him to. Philip and Saul often spoke together and found that they had a great deal in common. They began to make plans about what they would do after they were released. Saul had already decided to dedicate the rest of his life to crime. At first, Philip was shocked by such an outlook. But as the months passed he began to see Saul's point of view in a different light. In a letter to his sister, Philip wrote:
"I have met another inmate here, named Saul, and I wish you could have the opportunity of talking to him. Our conversations remind me of those happy days when you and I were in bed together, our arms around each other, and our tongues and hands exploring the secrets of the flesh."
The prison censorship took out a few lines in the letter, but still, when Rose received it she was furiously jealous. It sounded to her as though Philip were about to embark on a homosexual relationship. Since she and her brother had been practicing incest for many years, it was peculiar that a homosexual relation should have bothered her, but it did. She wrote a letter to Philip warning him against becoming embroiled with any inmate, since it would certainly have a damaging effect on him.
Rose's suspicious were correct; Philip was about to embark upon a passionate homosexual venture but at the time he had written his letter he was not aware of it. Only when his dreams began to be filled with erotic pictures of himself with Saul did he realize what was happening. At first he tried ruthlessly to tear the thoughts from his mind. But it was a futile attempt.
Finally he decided to fight it no longer, and to let the course of events go its own way, regardless of the consequences. One afternoon, both the young men were putting new books away on the shelves. Philip was on the ladder and Saul was passing the books up to him.
Philip was about to put a book on the shelf when he felt an arm on his leg. He did not move or say a word, for somehow he had been expecting it. Then he put the book on the shelf, and keeping his eyes focused straight ahead of him, he waited for the next move. It came swiftly. Saul dropped the pile of books he was holding and made one tentative step up the ladder. The first four rungs of the ladder were empty, since Philip was much higher up on it.
Saul moved Philip's trousers up along the leg until a portion of his self was bare. He pressed his lips to the bare flesh, and this first contact of his friend's bare calf, and Philip felt surges of desire flowing through his body. He did not wait. Still standing on the ladder, he loosened his pants and let them drop to his knees. His penis was erect and straining against his underwear. Saul reached up and gently pulled his member out into the open. Philip wished he would hurry. He thought of his penis as a doomed bird who would not live much longer, but before it died it wished to make the long migratory trip to a jewel--liked island in the South Pacific.
At first Saul only nibbled at the tip of his friend's penis, cooing to it as if it were, indeed, a bird. Philip had to keep a firm grip on the ladder, lest the unstable thing, which was swaying from side to side under the weight of the two men, fall over. Then Saul's tongue roved over his globes, which swung gently in their sack, and he sighed softly to express his delight. Finally Saul took his whole member into his mouth. Philip's body quivered with ecstatic feelings. The ladder swayed dangerously as Saul moved his mouth up and down along the sides of his friend's penis. For the first time since Philip had been imprisoned he began to feel free. As Saul's mouth continue to caress him, the burdens of imprisonment-seemed to glide over him. He thought of the rolling Connecticut hills he had known as a boy. He even thought of his father dead these many years, but the power of Philip's memory brought back the erotic nights spent in bed with his sister and father.
His penis grew and grew under Saul's delicate prodding. Then he whispered to his friend to watch out, for his seed was about to spill. Saul braced himself as best he could on the ladder and hardly moved as Philip's hot semen poured forth. His penis shuddered, and Saul stroked the delightful flesh as it finished its climax. His eyes were turned lovingly toward Philip, who had also been forced to brace himself extremely well.
Then it was over, and as if in a daze, they very slowly and methodically began to put the books on the shelves again. They did not speak to each other, so as not to defile the pure passion of the previous moments by any mundane words.
From that time onwards, almost every day was filled with fellatio and other erotic pasttimes. Philip looked forward eagerly to each day in the library, and the two young men grew closer and closer.
Their relationship eventually blossomed into a great love. One by one, the days flew by, and Philip did not even think of the forthcoming day of his release. All of his thoughts were devoted to Saul. As they were working in the closet together one afternoon, Saul closed the door of the closet abruptly. Philip smiled, realizing what would follow. But Saul did not reach for his penis-he turned his back to Philip. Philip walked over to him and kissed him softly behind the ear, as if to inquire what the matter was. His penis hungered for Saul's mouth. Saul looked back over his shoulder coyly, and he undid his pants, presenting his bare buttocks.
Philip understood exactly; he moved closer to Saul and the tip of his stiffened penis played with his friend's buttocks. Philip reached a hand around Saul's body and felt the softened member. He tried desperately to excite Saul's penis but he could not. Finally, slowly, he pushed his own penis between Saul's buttocks, and as it entered, Saul's organ began to harden. They stayed still for a moment just like that-penis between buttocks, hand on penis, lips searching for flesh, and the closet steamed with the odors of a violent passion.
Philip started to move his organ slowly, letting it glide in and out so as not to hurt his friend. But even so, little moans of pain and delirium came from Saul. Philip went faster and faster, until it seemed that the two bodies would melt together. Then Saul was almost thrown against the side of the closet and Philip climaxed. But before Saul could recover his balance, Philip spun him around and kneeling down, grasped Saul's hardened member in his mouth, gently, but firmly enough so that it would not jump out of his mouth in its excitement.
As Philip caressed Saul's penis with his lips, his thoughts returned to his sister, Rose, and he remembered that in spite of all these temporary loves, there was only one person whom he loved beyond time-and that was his sister.
It seemed like an eternity until Saul's organ reached that size and state of excitement that meant he would have his orgasm. But finally it came and Saul made sounds of joy as the sticky fluid poured out into Philip's mouth and onto the floor.
Saul was very good to Philip and he was able to obtain many benefits for his friend. He brought him many delicasies from the kitchen, where he had friends. Philip had an idea how Saul managed to procure these things, but he did not want to make any moral judgment on the method.
One morning as they both reported for work in the library, Philip spotted Saul carrying a small canvas bag. He was surprised that Saul could have carried that size bag about the kitchen, but when he reflected on his friend's wile, he realized that nothing was impossible. Saul said nothing about the package and Philip did not ask him anything. Finally, after lunch, Saul pulled him to one side.
"What do you think I have in here?"
"I don't know," admitted Philip.
Saul was positively gleeful at having out-foxed his friend and his laughter echoed through the prison library.
Saul opened the canvas bag. There was a live duck inside. A rope was tied around its beak to keep it quiet. Saul held it up in the air for his friend to admire.
"Where can we go for privacy?" he asked Philip in a conspiratorial voice.
Philip recommended the closet, but he didn't understand what his friend was up to.
"Of course, we can't cook it there," Philip mentioned, a bit perplexed.
"Cook?" repeated Saul, laughing uproariously as if his friend had made one of the funniest jokes of the century.
They went into the closet and squatted down on the floor. Saul had a sharpened file in his shoe and he removed it, twirling it around between his fingertips and letting the small shafts of light that penetrated the closet gleam on it.
"Are you still unaware of what I am about to do?" Saul asked his friend.
"Well," replied Philip, smiling, "I am sure you are not going to help the bird."
Saul laughed, and before the last traces of a smile had vanished from his lips he drew the file across the neck of the bird. For a moment there was nothing, not even a slight movement. Then the neck split open and a torrent of blood spilled out onto both of them.
Saul continued cutting until the head was severed from the body, and then the bird began to thrash about. Saul held the bird in front of him, the open neck facing toward Philip, and he began to gesture in a beckoning fashion.
Philip was confused:
"What do you want me to do? I don't understand."
"Come closer, much closer. And take your penis out of your pants."
Philip did as his friend suggested. He came closer to the bird and exposed his penis-it lay soft and pliant against his leg. Saul grabbed it and began to stroke it with one bloody hand as the other hand held the decapitated but still thrashing bird. Finally Philip's penis was aroused and the open, ragged hole of the duck's neck lay before him. Saul moved the bird's open neck over Philip's penis like a bloody glove. As his penis penetrated that raw and heated opening, Philip shook with anticipation. He had never felt anything like it. He had never felt such flesh engulfed him. Saul did not rush it. He pushed the bird forward a bit at a time, always sure to rotate the bird so as to give his friend the maximum amount of pleasure. The bird was still thrashing of its own accord, and Saul added to the movement by jerking it up and down on Philip's penis. The combination of the freshly butchered flesh and the veins and arteries of the gaping wound drove Philip wild with excitement.
"Faster, faster! Move it faster!" Philip's commands came breathlessly. His voice trailed off at the end, as if the words couldn't mirror his need for increased activity.
Saul pushed the bird up and down as fast as he could, and Philip reached an absolute frenzy of excitement. The thrust of his penis finally caused the bird's neck to split apart, and his semen poured through the gory remains as he climaxed.
A few weeks later, the inevitable came. Philip was to be released. His days in prison had been so Utopian since he had met Saul that he had given no thought to his release. In fact, he had forgotten all about it. Now, the news shocked him, and he went so far as to contemplate doing something which would force the prison authorities to have him remain there.
Saul cautioned him against such an action, telling Philip that if he did something which would be considered bad enough to prevent his release, the authorities would probably transfer him to another prison, so nothing would be accomplished. Philip realized the truth of his friend's advice. There was nothing he could do but resign himself to the coming date. In the meantime, however, they both resolved to intensify their lovemaking so that their last days together would be memorable ones.
On Philip's last day in the library Saul asked him to come into the closet for a goodbye gift. Once inside, Saul fell to knees, weeping and moaning over the impending departure of his friend. Saul maintained this irrational behavior for many minutes, and his cries began to grow so loud that Philip feared the noise would betray them. He tried every means to comfort his friend but they were futile.
Then he grabbed Saul by the shirt and asked him: "What is the goodbye gift you promised me?" For some reason, this question, combined with a vigorous shaking, made Saul come to his senses. "A gift?" he queried, perplexed.
"Yes, you told me you had a gift for me, to ease the strain of our parting."
Then Saul's eyes lit up and he thrust his hands in Philip's trousers and brought out his penis. Without any further ado he performed fellatio on Philip, putting his whole body and soul into the effort, and giving Philip a few moments of the most exquisite pleasures he had ever experienced. When he was through and Philip's organ lay exhausted between his thighs, Saul spoke very briefly of his great love for Philip and asked to be remembered.
Two days later Philip was released. They placed him on a bus to New York. Philip had written to his sister of the date and time of his arrival and she was at the bus terminal to greet him. Rose had taken a small apartment in Jersey City and she had purchased an extra cot for Philip to use when he came home.
"You look thin, but other than that, you look fine," Rose said to him as they were relaxing in the apartment only a few hours after he had arrived at the bus depot.
"I am fine," he replied, "but I hope things will begin to look even brighter."
He did not explain his strange remark to Rose, but she was frightened that he intended to go into some type of illegal activity again, only to end up back in the penitentiary.
He looked very tired, so she drew his bath and then made up the bed in order for him to take a nap. He bathed, lay down, and in an instant he was asleep. He slept for many hours, and when he began to stir and wake, Rose climbed into bed with him. Still drowsy, he stretched out his hand and felt the soft, warm flesh of her breasts. He was awake in an instant, trying to shake the fuzziness from the long sleep out of his brain.
Rose's breasts were soft and pliant under his demanding hands, and her nipples quickly stiffened, inviting him, calling for him with passion heightened by his long absence. She could see the bright gleam of his teeth, and she almost wanted that brightness to sink forever into her flesh. His teeth played gently with her nipples, like those of a young cat who has caught an especially succulent mouse. She moaned with pleasure. It had been so very long since she and her brother were together....too long! "Did you miss me?"
"Yes," Philip lied, "You were all that I thought about."
She cried out with pleasure at his words and moved her nipples deep into his mouth, her hands roving all over his body and caressing his long-missed flesh.
He released her nipples and began to kiss the soft skin of her belly. She shuddered, the most delightful sinking feeling came over her, and she ran her hands frantically through his disheveled hair. Then he kissed her navel, and spread her thighs wide. She closed her eyes, and as his tongue reached her vagina she sighed and wriggled her toes as if to show that all was right in the world again.
They made love for hours. His tongue made the walls of her vagina fairly sing with passion. His tongue went in and over every part of her body and she reciprocated by holding his penis between her lips and humming a tune so that the soft air would caress the tip of his member, and the pleasure of this drove Philip wild.
The next morning she asked him what he was planning to do. He replied that he was going to look for a job. In a few moments he was out of the house. He returned late the same evening. When she asked him whether he had been successful, he smiled, and threw a wad of money on the table. She picked it up and counted it. There was five hundred dollars in the bundle.
"Where in the world did you get this?" Rose demanded.
"I earned it," he replied, still smiling.
"Where? Where could you earn five hundred dollars in one day?"
He picked up the money and pushed it under her face:
"Either you want some or you don't but don't nag me. Keep your mouth shut!"
Night after night for many weeks, Philip brought home huge sums of money, until one day he came home with a bloodied face and a severe cut on the back of his neck. And he had no money to throw on the table. Then all the facts fell into place and Rose realized what her brother had been doing. He had been out mugging. She cursed herself that she had been so stupid as not to have guessed it immediately. She presented him with the evidence. The moment she finished speaking he sat down at the table, his head bent and all his arrogance vanished.
"You're right, sis, absolutely right. I guess if I can't talk with a woman who is both my sister and my lover, then I must be in pretty bad shape."
Rose's heart almost broke as she heard her brother speak like that. She wanted to help him. She need to help him. Philip continued:
"When I was in the penitentiary I had a long and passionate homosexual love affair. I even thought of hitting a guard so that they wouldn't let me leave, but at the last minute I was dissuaded from doing so. The day I left the penitentiary and came here, I felt funny. I felt as if I would never again be able to become excited by sex. For me, sex seemed dead. Then we made love, and while it was enjoyable, it wasn't the way it was when we were young. The fact was clear: I could no longer be satisfied merely by sex. So the next day I found violence. Now it is violence that I crave. It's violence that arouses my organs and sets my blood pounding. It's violence I am thinking of when we are together at night. The money I get from this violence, these muggings, is only incidental."
Rose could not speak for many minutes. She tried to sort out everything her brother had said. Then she said to him:
"You realize, of course, that your craving for violence will end in disaster for you?"
"I do. But as you remember, years ago, no threat would have frightened me enough to keep me away from your bed."
When he said that Rose burst into tears. She couldn't bear the idea of him returning to the penitentiary, or worse, bleeding to death in some dark alleyway, shot by a policeman's bullet. What could she do?
"Philip," she pleaded, "I am asking you to give me a week, and during that time you must refrain from these violent activities. Just give me the change to help you-I beg you.
She fell down on the floor and grasped his legs. Her whole body shook from fright and her dreadful feelings of helplessness to help him.
"All right," he conceded, reluctantly, "you have a week, but there is really nothing you can do." With that remark he went to sleep.
Rose soon realized what had to be done. She had to bring back the misplaced sexuality which had led her brother to experience orgasms when committing violent acts. But how could that be done? Her body by itself was no longer able to entrance him. Then, in a flash, she remembered the bundle of books her father had left to them when he died. She always carried a small group of these, wrapped in cloth and placed at the bottom of her suitcase. They had never been opened. She rushed to the closet where her suitcase was and dragged it out and opened it. The bundle, yellow and frayed, was still intact. She undid the string, and her fingers trembling, she leafed through the manuscripts.
She realized immediately that they were priceless. Each book was a rare edition of some valuable erotic classic. The mysteries of the most sublime sexualities were hidden in their pages. But normal sexuality, no matter what the variation, could not wean Philip from his violence. She knew this instinctively.
She searched for ancient and tried procedures pertaining to oral sex. This, she knew, was the only form of sex powerful enough and sublime enough to remove Philip's attachment to violence. The days wore on and her week was almost up. Then she found it. At least, she found something which might just do the trick. It was a method, described as a holy ritual, which keepers of the flame (in this case, young girls) would perform on priests. It had originated somewhere in Hong Kong. All day she sat at her desk, poring over the scanty details, wishing there had been a fuller explanation. But she would have to make do with the information she had.
Rose was bursting with anticipation at the thought of a passionate reunion with her brother. Her body began to quiver gently as she imagined his body, and she had a vision of Philip's erect penis, calling to her, or so it seemed.
He was silent and morose that evening, as he usually was. Then, without a word of good-night, he abruptly went off to bed. The moment after he left, Rose went into the kitchen to prepare the material. It took her only about fifteen minutes, and she carried a small jar out of the kitchen with her as she went to her brother's bed. He was already sleeping when she crept into bed with him. Gently, she opened the fly of his trousers and exposed his sexual organs. They were so beautiful she was tempted to kiss them, but she restrained herself since she did not want him to wake yet. Taking some of the jelly-like substance out of the small jar, she began to apply a thin film of it onto his globes. When it was all over them she took some more of the jelly in her hands and began to rub them together. The heat from the friction of her hands acted on the jelly, changing its chemical makeup and making it into a new and more powerful substance. This substance she placed, very sparingly, on her tongue, lips, and the inside of her mouth. Then she sat back and waited, holding his coated globes gingerly, as if expecting them to explode.
Philip began to stir. The experiment was beginning to work. He was neither awake nor completely asleep, but Rose could feel the heat flowing through his body. She peered closely at his globes. The jelly seemed to be penetrating them, creasing them, but otherwise there was no damage or change.
In his semi-conscious state, Philip felt the most delicious feeling in his globes. They seemed to be expanding and contracting slowly, moving inward and outward in accordance with the movements of the heavens and the contractions of the galaxies. Then he felt as though his globes had been transferred to his heart and his heart to where his globes had been, and he felt that a glorious young girl was performing fellatio on his heart.
One after the other the most sublime visions came to him, all of them using his globes as the central theme. He saw a whole group of young boys, each of them beautifully made and each of them looking like his friend Saul, licking his globes with their splendid tongues.
When he seemed to be growing frantic because he could not stand these degrees of ecstasy for too long, Rose woke him. He sat straight up, a shocked look on his face, not knowing where he was or who he was. She comforted him and told him what she had done. He fell back, exhausted, unable to speak or to pass judgment. He told her, briefly, with his hands, that he had gone through one of the most extraordinary experiences of his life.
She smiled when he said that, for she had not used the second part of her method.
He closed his eyes, as if to fall asleep again. Rose knew that this was the time. She touched the tip of his penis with her tongue, which, along with the lips and mouth, had been coated with the heated jelly. Then she moved her mouth onto the whole penis, and it stood upright. Her tongue flicked back and forth against the tip, the heated jelly entering the flesh and beginning to make the penis dance and quiver in the most unusual manner. The moisture from her mouth calmed it down somewhat but then her lips drove his organ into another frenzy. It is impossible to describe the feelings that Philip experienced. Rose became as frantic as him, having been deprived of that piece of delightful flesh for so long, and her internal heat further activated the miraculous powers of the jelly.
His organ moaned and whistled, it assumed a life of its own, it assumed a life that he could not fathom. All the passion of a thousand years, all the ecstasy of the far eastern cults, coalesced in his stiffened organ.
Finally, he could stand it no longer, and he grabbed his penis in both hands in order to stop the ecstasy, for he feared he would go insane. The moment he pulled his own organ out of his sister's mouth, the organ began to act up, like a bucking horse that was trying to fight its rider.
"Do not fight me, my darling," she said, and took the penis once again, and with a short burst of activity brought it to its bursting point, and the torrent of seed poured out, innundating the jelly and the bed.
He embraced her, unable to verbalize his joy, unable to thank his sister for her activities. Then he pushed her back down, and spread her thighs and his tongue entered her vagina, giving her all of his thanks in the form of a frantic stimulation.
As he thrust his powerful tongue in her, she glowed with pride and success. Their father's legacy had been true and powerful. She knew her brother had found something that violence could never equal. She knew that all would be well now, and thet there was no fear of his returning to the penitentiary. It didn't matter what job he took, or how little money they both made, or what the world thought of them, for every night, they would be initiated into the most ecstatic of all rituals.
Rose was right. Her brother stopped his morbid craving for violence and took a job in a large department store. We cannot say that they lived happily ever after, for our files do not have the complete record.
But one thing is certain. A passionate and avant-garde approach to Oral Sex kept a man from turning into a pathological killer, whose only thrills would be the attack on the victim. No one, of course, has a right to make a judgment on their incestuous behavior unless we carefully examine our own lives.
CHAPTER FOUR
By definition, incest is any form of sexual intercourse, or deviation, taking place within the structure of the same family.
The above definition makes no distinction between the degrees of relationship, i.e., in-laws, or blood relationships. For today, the thinking in the Western world is that any form of sexual participation by members of the same family, even if only through marriage, is incest.
It has not always been so. In the early times, a sharp distinction was made as to what comprised incest. The emphasis was placed on the consanguinity, the blood relationships, rather than the more distant ones of marriage. For the purpose of clarification, our study will consider the subject in the following order: (a) Incest between siblings, (b) father and daughter and (c) mother and son, inasmuch as this is the order in which they occur most often in society.
Freud has taught us that in order to understand any committed offense, we must first look for the motivation of that act. We ask ourselves then, why does one commit incest? Since it takes place in some families and not others, what are the reasons for its existence? Under what conditions does incest exist?
To get the answers to these questions we must look carefully at the family structure in which incest occurs. We must look at the problem of incest as a whole. The strength or weakness of the family might give us a clue.
Studies made, supply us with certain information about the type of family which might harbor the possibility of incest. We discover immediately that incest is found in all levels of life and in all economic brackets.
If we exempt what we will refer to as "political incest," i.e., that taking place among the heads of state, or in royal families, we are left with social incest and we find that there are certain common factors present in incestuous families, and note also, the common characteristics in the personalities of the participants of incest. We must assume then, that there are factors tending towards the committing of incest in those families where it does not occur.
As Herbert Blumer of the University of California notes in his introduction of INCEST BEHAVIOR by S. Kirson Weinberg, "For one thing, we note in the case of incest a failure to maintain the strength of the incest taboo in the family-a failure which in most of the cases is due to the weak position or incapacity of the mother. The presence in the family of a strong agent of society's condemnation of incest would seem definitely to bar the occurence of incest....the dependence of incest on a state of family disorganization or prior disorganization or prior disintegration. It is made very clear that not only the aggressor in incest is odd or abnormal; instead, the relations in the family are markedly abnormal and disorganized. Promiscuity in sex behavior on the part of parents or siblings, absence of family discipline, sadistic patterns of behavior, marked retreat of the family from outside relations, and the unusual helplessness of certain members of the family are some of the different forms of disintegration to be noted in families in which incest occurs."
We find also that the aggressor in incest, whether it be father, daughter, brother, sister, mother or son, has a career of prior personal disorganization, not including incest, but which encourages it.
Thus, "the incestuous act emerges from a background of the undermining and stultification of the individual's sense of his self, which dulls him to the group prohibition. And in this connection, we need to note the chain of purely incidental factors such as crowded quarters, common beds, and absence of privacy, which facilitate incest in a crowded family.
"And that the children have little opportunity to learn that society disapproves and condemns incest."
We note then, the common factors required for the non-occurrence of incest: (1) a strong mother image, (2) well organized family, (3) moral sex bahavior pattern, (4) strong ego on the part of the main members of the family, (5) and lastly, normal physical living environment.
It goes without saying, that the absence of the above make for a breeding-ground of incestuous behavior. We will immediately note, that physical overcrowding and the lack of privacy do not in themselves bring about incest.
They only make it easier for incest to occur. There must be a predisposition to incest in the first place. The home facilitates the consummation of the incest when there is already a desire for such a relationship, just as the lack of privacy affects the attitudes of the family members towards a weakened moral pattern.
"Overcrowded homes by disrupting personal privacy may break down the sexual barrier ... by bringing children prematurely into contact with the gross facts of sex," the Scotland Report finds.
But the important single factor emanating from an incestuous family is that the incestuous individual lacked the moral and emotional attitudes necessary for preventing incest, so that they fell prey easily to the existing factors conductive to committing incest.
The "incestuous family" then is different to a normal one in various ways. We might draw a picture of it thusly: it is made up of one or both parents, one or both of whom may be employed; there are usually more than two siblings; there is much overcrowding and a consequent lack of privacy.
The mother is permissive, lax or negligent. Often the mother is indifferent to the welfare of the children and the home, while having a good time and avoiding her household duties.
She sided with the father instead of the children in times of stress. There is an absence of closeness between her and the children, leaving the children "to raise themselves," or on the other hand, she is too weak to resist the tyranny of the father and withdraws from family crises.
The father on the other hand is overly authoritarian. He is dominant in the family because he intimidates the family members. He is often unemployed and is supported by other members of the family.
Often the father is violent, abusive, cruel, self-assertive, threatening and contentious. Often also, the father exploits the family, shifting responsibility to others in the family, but always maintains the authority for himself.
Fathers who work might squander their money on drink and in other ways, or, change jobs frequently and yet manage to dominate the family through fear.
The children in such homes obeyed the father through being browbeaten, but not through love or respect. There is rarely admiration for either the father or the mother. Resentment is generally undercurrent.
Often the father is secretly hated, with the dismissal that "he did nothing for me"; the mother held in disrespect because "she didn't stick up for me."
The children of the families find it difficult to cultivate friendships with others outside the family, or with members of the opposite sex. They usually do poorly in school, and belong to no community groups such as the Boy or Girl Scouts.
They receive no information on sex from their parents except from the exposure of living in too-closely confined quarters, thus supplying them with sexual freedom, and much opportunity for exploration and experiment. They are often more familiar with sex at an early age, than children from less crowded homes, even while being ignorant about the responsibilities of sex.
Children from such homes rarely go to church or receive moral teachings in any way. They lack supervision or control and obtain no sex restraints from the parents, or little affection from them.
There is little demonstration of love in the home. Promiscuity is accepted as natural when it occurs. Gambling, drinking and philandering are accepted as natural. Profane, abusive language is customary.
In addition, the relationship between husband and wife is either not close, with the mother going her way and the father his, or there is only one parent in the home, usually a mother, in which case the family would be recipient of public welfare.
The children, unable to build stable friendships outside of the family, usually become dependent on each other, thus developing into an in-grown family. Often, there are children of different fathers.
We see then, that there are common factors in a family setting which predispose its members towards the committing of incest. Which form of incest the members finally perform is determined by the factors present.
TYPES OF INCEST
Statistics and studies made, tell us that incest follows three basic forms, i.e., brother-sister; father-daughter; and mother-son. Social workers know also that there is a high incidence of incest in the lower degrees of family kinship, i.e., in-law and step-relationship and through marriage.
The type of incest is determined by characteristics and factors found in the family situation itself, and the attitudes of the parties involved.
We will discuss each of the major type of incest separately and describe the general conditions nourishing each.
BROTHER-SISTER INCEST
By far and large, this is reported as the most common type of incest. It is my opinion as a social worker, doing pediatric and family casework in New York City that a far greater number--never get reported. Most reported cases are brought to light only when the girl involved becomes pregnant.
Many families have multiple brother-sister incest activity, In this type of incest, there is always the danger of prolonged continuation because of the care of the participants, in keeping it secret.
Often the brother-sister incest continues throughout the lifetime of the individuals and throughout the marriage of both parties. After all, few people will think badly of a brother or sister who shows devotion to each other. One dismisses such a situation with a casual observation as, "They are very close."
In addition, incest is usually a subject, that is avoided. Even to think about it, is considered too horrible for most people. So it is made easier for the brother and sister to enjoy the forbidden love without fear of censure from the public.
Should any other member of the family suspect incest between two siblings, they would be enjoined from speaking about it, and would be brought into the conspiracy of silence surrounding the couple involved. It is important to note that incest occurs in families of all sections of the population and in all racial groups.
Studies have shown, however, that recent immigrants from the "peasant" countries of Europe, as well as the poor and illiterate, tend to have a higher incidence of incest than other groups.
Sometimes in cases of incest between brother and sister, it is the sister who reports the brother's incestuous behavior. The sisters usually act, out of fear of the brother.
More incest occurs in rural areas, than in cities. When it is detected in cities, the neighbors are usually not so stirred up over the disclosure and accept the incident with less intensity than would be the case in rural areas.
Most brothers and fathers involved in incest are found in the unskilled, manual occupations. A large number of them are unemployed, at the time of the incest, or are unstable in their work pattern.
The intelligence of this type of individual participating in incest was usually found to be below normal, although this is truer of the father-daughter type than the brother-sister. The brother is more inclined to be evenly disturbed in intelligence than the fathers. It would be wrong to say, however, that intelligence determines incest.
But studies show that intelligence indirectly influences social maladjustment, which in turn influences the personality of the incestuous male member and thus, the organization of the family unit.
The contrary, of course is true of the female member if she is a sister, or a daughter. The lower the intelligence of the female, the longer the incestuous affair is likely to endure.
Thus the feebleminded female member is more dependent on the male member than the more intelligent female, who is more likely to protest and resist the incest, and often is responsible for reporting it.
The personality of the male member of an incestuous relationship usually can be described as egocentric, inadequate, emotionally unstable, and is either a psychopathic personality or a sexual psychopath.
These males are also likely to be alcoholic, paranoid, suspicious, quarrelsome with friends and employers (thus making it impossible to hold a job) and other members of the family.
The family size is usually large, averaging about five and six children, often having more than one father--in or out of legal status.
In the brother-sister incestuous relationship, the brother is usually the older, and the aggressor. The fathers of the relationship exhibited a greater knowledge of birth control than did the brothers. This resulted in a greater rise in pregnancies and childbirths among the sisters than among the daughters.
The sisters, however, were older and more promiscuous than the daughters. The females were generally guilty of sexual laxity and this resulted in ready cooperation in the incestuous affair. Most participated willingly when this promiscuity was present, with the sisters more willing than the daughters.
The promiscuous sisters had the greater tendency to invite the relationship than the non-promiscuous group. Often there was a history of prostitution present.
Often the fathers dominated the daughters through violence and abuse, thereby projecting a false authority over the children. This, together with the low-level intelligence of the daughter and a latent promiscuity made her an easy prey to his advances.
Often the fathers would commit the incestuous act through sharing a bed with his daughter; and also, while the mother was away from the home. Once initiated, he would continue to keep control through fear, threats and domination.
This was true, even while the father was unemployed and was being supported by his wife. He would not give up his control, even though he lacked the financial dominance needed to maintain a real position as head of the family.
In most instances, the members had a desire for such a relationship, or there was no unwillingness for its occurrence. This was due to a lack of organization in the family, or the low level of inteligence.
In the mother-son incest cases, the mother was usually of a weak personality and the father was usually out of the home. When the father was present, he was the retiring, weak member and the mother the dominant one.
The social relations between the mother and son were either based on the son being the aggressor, or the mother being the aggressor. When the mother was the aggressor, the relationship between them was ambivalent, intimate yet hostile; and when the son was the aggressor, the relationship was either distant or close.
The mother was either widowed or separated from her husband generally, and when the father was present in the family, he was weak and ineffective.
The incestuous mother was usually sexually and socially aggressive, and incapable of sustaining enduring relationships with a man on a normal level.
Her attitude towards the children were selfish, and exploitative. Often she felt that they were burdens and she thus neglected them, and sought her own social life away from the home.
She was frequently alcoholic and promiscuous, often a prostitute. The sons were unloved and dependent on the mother for emotional sustenance and for guidance. She was indifferent to the daughters and irresponsible in general, so that the children raised themselves.
The studies we have available indicate that the backgrounds of the incestuous fathers have similar items. Often they were deprived of a normal family life by the death or separation of the parents, some were reared in disorganized homes with loose cultural patterns of sex, or were raised in public institutions, or were reared in extremely ingrown families.
They might be classifed loosely in the following categories:
(a) endogmatic, or intrafamily oriented
(b) extreme promiscuity
(c) pedophilia, or a love for children for sex purposes. The endogmic incest member uses his family members because he lacks the ability to cultivate females outside the family for social or sexual purposes. In this light, Jung states that a husband lacking basic relationship with his wife will consciously or unconsciously seek a love substitute in his daughter.
If this is not possible, his libido regresses to the memory of his mother in unconscious incest. Often the advances of the father to his daughter is explained by the Oedipus complex. In this case, the daughter is a substitute for her mother, and is made to assume the role her mother is expected to play.
The three types of incestors (males) possess different attitudes towards sex. The endogamic type is usually not promiscuous. The pedophilia type confined his lust to physically immature girls and the last type was indiscriminately promiscuous.
THE ENDogamic lived a family-oriented life, since he was incapable of building social relationships on a normal, competitive basis outside the home.
The pedophile was incapable of sustaining or building relationships with adult women and is incapable of obtaining satisfaction sexually in a normal sex relationship. He is insecure and weak in his impulses and feels anxious about his sexual abilities.
His desire for children arose basically from psychosexual immaturity and/or retardation. This lust for young girls was often accompanied by desire for perversions.
The promiscuous male was promiscuous before and after marriage and viewed women purely as sexual objects and avenues for satisfying his lust.
His sexual interest in women was usually a result of hostility rather than tenderness, which he lacked. He was fundamentally interested in seduction, and when he was not appeased, he vented his hostility on them by abusing, beating and in other ways, hostile to them.
Since his interest was essentially sexual, he pursued loose women and prostitutes, and thus reinforced his low opinion of women generally, by categorizing all women as being the same.
He was undisciplined when sustained attention was required and squandered all his money on loose women and drink. He frequented prostitutes and was always on the lookout for women he could seduce. He was interested in variety and not in the building of a sustained relationship with anyone.
Though he might marry, he scored marital obligations and family ties, and openly boasted about his outside interests. Often he would discuss them with his wife, of if this were not possible, he would find some way to let her know what he was doing.
As age diminished his prowess and attraction to women, he would become increasingly frustrated sexually and his hostility intensifies. Finding no outlet, but becoming more and more frustrated because of his sexual discontent, especially if he is denied sexual relations with his wife, he would seek sex outlets with a member of the family.
Social relations between the male incestor and his wife is usually conflicting and sexual relations is usually strained. Their incompatibility results from inadequate income since he is not a good provider, an adulterer, and general abuser.
The spouse's disapproval of his irresponsible ways easily upset him. And the marriage worsens with the years. He appears unable to cultivate a tender attachment with his wife.
He is unable also to tolerate the customary frustrations of daily living, and is suspicious, hostile and brutal. As a result, he is always on the search for the ideal woman and subordinates marital and family considerations to he-donic pleasures and transient gratification.
It is necessary to note that their wives had complementary personalities and needs, which these husbands satisfy. Some wives, passively masochistic accept their husbands' abuse. Others, morally rigid, despite their protestations agains their husbands' behavior, had hidden desires for them. Still others were emotionally immature and socially irresponsible and finally, others were deceived by the husbands' manner during their courtship days and taken in before really getting to know them.
Most wives react negatively to sexual relations with their incestuous husbands, especially if they are the promiscuous type. They are averse to the demands made upon them because the sex act is mechanically physical and devoid of affection and tenderness.
According to Weinberg, "the indiscriminately promiscuous types, who seemed incapable of affection, were especially hostile to their wives. These wives complained that though they were sexually excited they were 'love starved.'"
THE NATURE OF THE INCEST ATTACHMENT
The incest attachment is an emotional attraction, which one incest participant has for the other. It can result from genuine affection, or from possessive lust. In it, the active participant becomes concerned about the other participant's activities. Some scientists refer to this attachment as "incestuous love."
Others refer to it as erotic bond in which one party is intensely in love with the other. It resulted in a sense of guilt and shame, because it could not be brought to full expression.
Widowed fathers and widowed mothers who succumb because of the "recognition motive," and with their adult daughter and son respectively, become "loving couples."
In incest love, however, a reciprocal attraction exists between the participants. Both are voluntary partners and they comply with each other's wishes. The intensity of the incest attachment varies and depends on the character of the participants' previous relationships and from their prospects for association with other women or men.
The endogamic participant usually concentrates his social relationships upon the partner because he usually does not seek attention elsewhere. He tends to sustain the incest relationship and to create permanency.
The promiscuous type who is bold in his relations with other women will disregard the incest relationship, when other women are available. He may consider his incest partner as an accessible sex object to be turned to when he needs her.
She is a source of sexual satisfaction, rather than of love. Such men will induce their partners into prostitution, so that the girls will fill a double purpose of supplying their basic double needs.
In the brother-sister incest relationships where the attachment is interpersonal, the siblings often outgrow the incest need and their desires for each other are deflect quite casually.
In such cases, because of the casual nature of the incest relationship, it often goes unreported for neither party would refer to it anymore.
Some of the girls having known incest, become promiscuous after the termination of the relationship. They may become prostitutes. All tend to become sexually loose, even if they were not so before.
Most were shy and even hostile to men. There is also the tendency to marry one unlike the members of the family, which Marcuse calls, the "neurotic exogamy."
Many married, but were unable to achieve any stability in their marriage, and left their husbands to become adulterous. This is especially true of the sisters, and daughter-sisters. The daughters, as a group made the best adjustment in marriage.
EFFECTS UPON THE MALE PARTICIPANT
Many male participants react to incest by intense guilt and fear of detection, though some fear only detection. Some blame the other participant for leading him on. Most denied committing the incestuous act when arrested and tried.
Even in prison, the ones most reluctant to admit and confess their guilt were the incest offenders. The expressions of shame must not be construed as guilt feelings, rather they are reactions to intense social disapproval, as these offenders are aware of the social disapproval attached to the offense.
Also, the promiscuous offender, among whom would be psychopaths, is unable to feel guilt but does respond to shame. His silence is to protect himself. When it is admitted, it is minimized.
THE EFFECT OF INCEST ON THE FAMILY
The position of the father as head and authority is lost, as the daughter participant loses her affection and respect for him as a parent.
The role of the daughter involved is changed. She may be given an inferior sibling role if she resists, or associates with other boys. She may become the favorite when she submits.
The other siblings, especially the brothers, are usually unsuccessful in protecting their sister from their father. Or she might become the defender of her younger sisters in resisting her father's advances, or may consider the sister replacing her as a rival for her father's attentions.
The most important effect upon the family is the tension between the daughter, or between the siblings and the father.
In the brother-sister relationship, the normal sibling relationship is broken down, as the sister begins to consider her brother as a boy friend and not a brother. If the incest continues after one marries, the unmarried sibling then competes with the spouse for the married sibling's affection.
In the mother-son incestuous relationship, the son replaces the father in the husband role. If the husband is absent, the son assumes the paternal role. The mother may then have designs to prevent his marriage.
It is because of these effects that incest is so frowned upon by the church. It is the strongest threat to the strength of the family as a social institution. In the following pages we will observe more closely how this is so.
The other reason why incest is so avidly fought is biological. Scientists fear that inbreeding will prolong and perpetuate any defects present in the family blood lines, without an opportunity to be weaked by interfamily breeding.
CHAPTER FIVE
Meryl P., a seventeen-year-old "call girl" relates how she found herself in "business." Her particular case may be unique-as may be the characters involved in her case history-but there are many young people who are similar to Meryl, among our friends and neighbors, or even ourselves.
Meryl was the third child of parents for whom life was a never-ending struggle. When she was seven, her mother gave birth to a child who died after six days. Her father, who was a house-painter, dramatized the tragedy. His "grief" was assuaged at the neighborhood bar and even after his mind was so benumbed by alcohol that he could hardly remember his own name, he would chisel drinks from the other customers.
His wife had long ago accepted his inadequacy to earn their livelihood and she took on various housework jobs.
Earlier she had fought with her lazy husband, but by the time Meryl came along, she had accepted the pattern of her life and had begun to talk and think like her husband. She talked of "the rich get richer and the poor get poorer" and "them that has, gets," and all the other cliches of the under-privileged. She got into the habit of taking things from the homes in which she worked and condoning her actions with platitudes about the "extra time" she never charged for and "they expect us to pad out our pay this way."
"When I was a kid, I got so I didn't know which one of them was on the speaker's platform," Meryl related. "Both made the same sounds, the same lies, the same excuses. Except for the tone of voice, it was hard to tell which one was doing the griping."
By the time Meryl was ten, the city welfare workers had realized the hopelessness of spurring the father into any consistent work habit and had privately resigned themselves to furnishing support for the family. It was with this stigma of permanent welfare and charity hand-outs that Meryl entered junior high school. Although the school numbered far more poverty-stricken students than rich ones, Meryl found herself at the bottom even of the deprived groups.
There was one subtle difference, however. Most of the other youngsters had fairly well accepted their status in life. Meryl did not. She watched the richer young people and wondered about ways in which she might be like them. She did not delude herself that either her father or mother would ever provide the key. She knew even then that it was up to her if she were to break free from the filthy neighborhood where she lived.
Meryl was a pretty and well-built girl at sixteen. She watched the way the better girls in school dressed and tried to come as close to their styling as her poverty would permit. She baby-sat at every opportunity and when she earned a little money she would invest it in clothing purchased at "economy" stores. She also patterned her manner of speech upon the upper-bracket group, and without appearing too ambitious, she began to form friendships with those girls. She knew that once the girls accepted her, acceptance by the boys would follow.
"One rainy afternoon, I came home from school," Meryl told. My mother-was out ironing for the Johnson family which meant she wouldn't be back till six. My dad was 'checking' for jobs with the local union. That meant he was really at the bar lapping up all the free drinks he could cadger. My older brother, Mac, had stayed late at school for basketball practice.
"I thought I was alone in the house. I got the idea of looking through Dad's room. He sometimes had sexy things hidden away and I never knew what I'd find. I started searching for reefers which I suspected he might have. I found two of them between the mattress cover and the mattress. They were carefully wrapped in waxed paper to keep them safe.
"I thought I'd try one. I got a match from the kitchen and lit up. I took a deep drag like I'd seen them do in the movies. Nothing much happened. I took another couple of puffs and made sure I inhaled all the way. After a little while, I got a nice feeling. It was as if time were standing still. Everything seemed much nicer. The colors in the room didn't look drab any more. They glowed and shimmered. I felt relaxed. I stretched out on the bed and took another nice puff. Then I saw it. Up in the dusty old glass lamp shade that hung from the cracked ceiling, I saw something inside. I knew right away, my dear dad had put it up there. It had to be something he was doubly anxious to keep away from prying eyes. I got a chair and by putting a foot-stool on top of that I could reach into the lamp shade for what was hidden there.
"It was a small photo album. Pictures of Dad and his crowd. They had evidently gotten hold of a Polaroid camera and taken all these pictures. The pictures were not very good from a photographer's standpoint. Some were too dark, some too light. But they made up for it in other ways. They were action shots of a gang-fuck. And old Dad was right among the leaders.
"In one shot, he was stripped nude, like all the rest, and had this big hard-on. A girl who was about twenty-five was on her knees in front of him. She was a dark-haired chick and I remembered seeing her with the crowd once or twice at the taco stand. I think her old man was a Puerto Rican and her mother German. She looked pure Latin. She weighed about one sixty and most of it was in her tits and ass. She had her mouth wrapped tight around the end of Dad's dick and she was smiling up at him. He had this 'cat-eating-pussy' look on his face as his hand rested on her dark hair.
"Another shot showed Dad holding her in his lap. He was holding the end of her great big tit in his mouth and she had her arms around his head to keep him close. From the way she was squatted on his lap, I knew his dick was up in her.
"There were other shots of other things. One guy was ramming his dick up the ass of a slim girl who was gnawing on the dick of another guy laying on his back. One shot that got to me was two young girls who couldn't have been any older than me. They were sixty-nining it. I found my butt twitching a little as I saw this. It looked like something I'd enjoy. I'd never been banged up to that point in my life.
"Suddenly the door opened and there was Dad. I hadn't heard him. He had been down in the basement and from the look on his face, I think he was having himself a little 'pot' session. He looked sort of glazed and bleary-eyed. But he snapped out of it when he saw me laying on his bed with one of his reefers in my hand, looking at his collection of pictures.
"What the hell are you doing in here?" He moved up fast and grabbed the pictures out of my hand. He was sore as hell. He glared down at the reefer in my hand and knocked it out of my fingers. It fell on the bare floor and he stamped it out fast. Then, he picked up the crushed butt and shoved it in his pants pocket.
"I was in a bind and I knew it. He had caught me with my pants down. Smoking a reefer and spying on his fuck-book! He came toward me and he was really mad. I held my breath, scared he was going to slug me. I had to save my hide. 'You hit me and I'll tell Mom about you in those pictures!' I stared back at him, but I was tight inside.
"You little bitch," he gritted the words out. 'Get out of my room and stay out! The next time I catch you in here, I'll strangle you, so help me!' He meant it, too. I didn't dare move. I just lay there, staring up at him. He waited.
"I knew I had to make a move sooner or later. I decided to pay it cool. More of less ease my way out. Stalling for time, I said, 'Those pictures-when did you take them?' He glowered at me, and finally answered: 'None of your damn business!' I asked another question. 'Are you in love with that dark girl?'
"In love?" He looked disgustedly down at me. 'Yeah, I'm in love! I'm in love with her big, hairy snatch!' He shook his head at me. 'That's all you broads are good for! A fast fuck!'
"I picked this up. I told him not to use such dirty talk around me. I figured it was best to get him on the defense to ease out of the jam. After all, he had caught me smoking a reefer and I was looking at his sex pictures.
"Don't hand me that crap!" he sneered at me. 'You're playing the part of some kind of fancy dame and all the time you're smoking one of my reefers and creaming your pants over pictures of some hard action! Who do you think you're kidding?'
"He suddenly reached down and grabbed my hand and yanked hard to get me out of his bed. I didn't want him shoving me around so I tried to pull free. He yanked harder and I found myself falling toward the floor. I grabbed onto him to keep from falling. I was up close to his waist. My tits were pressed tight to his body. I hung on grimly. He tried to work my arms loose. He was really sore. But I was pretty strong for a kid and it wasn't easy to get clear of my locked arms. 'Let go, you little bitch!' He lifted his fist to smack me. I buried my face against his chest to protect myself. Then, it happened. He didn't slug me. I could sense a change coming over him. I could feel his dick inside his pants. It was getting hard. Really big and hard. We just hung on like that for a few seconds. The dick kept growing. He was hung like a bull. I felt like it was going to shove right through to me. I began wiggling a little. I figured if I got him hot enough, he'd forget his plan to slug me. He forgot that, but he was getting more interested in something else. Me.
"I could feel his hands moving down to my sweater. He yanked it up and over my shoulders. It couldn't go up further because I still had my arms tightly locked around his middle. Now, he reached down and yanked my short skirt up over my hips. I had on cotton panties and he ripped those off like they were paper. He shoved me back onto the bed. He worked his dick out of his pants and jammed it up between my thighs. I was scared, but I liked the feeling, I kept my thighs together but I let them slip just a bit as the big head of his dick kept working up against me. He got the head partly up and then he rammed it in all the way. He wasn't copping any cherry, if that's what he was hoping for. I'd taken care of that when I was just starting to grow fuzz. I'd used bananas, candles, weenies and anything that looked like a dick. But none of them were as big or felt as hard as the dick my dad jammed up my snatch. It hurt. It hurt like hell. But he didn't care. He pounded it up and up into me. I felt like it might come out of my mouth from the way he kept shoving. Then, he shot his wad inside of me. He finished all the way and got up off of me. He shook his fist under my nose and warned me if I told anybody what he'd done, he'd kill me.
"A few weeks later, he caught me alone again and he humped me good. I acted like I wasn't anxious but I liked the feeling, This time it was better because I could relax more. He used a rubber on me and I didn't have to worry about getting knocked up. That second time we did it twice before we called it quits.
"Another rainy day, he came back home and caught me up in my room doing homework. We had the place to ourselves. He was pretty sure of himself. He walked in and stood behind me. He let his hands drop down and he cupped my tits in them. He ran his hands round and round, centering on the nipples. They started to stiffen up on me, but I kept right on doing my homework.
"He pulled away and I didn't even look around. I could tell he was undressing from the sounds. Then, he walked around in front of me. He was naked. His dick was sticking out like a flagpole. I had to admit he was all man down there. He held it in his hand and waved it at me.
"I don't have any rubbers on me today," he smiled smugly. 'But there's more than one way to fuck! I'm going to let you blow me!'
"That's what you think," I said. I didn't look at him, but from the corner of my eye I could see him standing there with that big dick in his hand, not quite sure what to do with it.
"Come on," he muttered, 'quit playing that good-girl bit on me. You want it as much as I do!' "Get lost," I told him.
"That really frosted him. He started calling me dirty names, like prick-teaser. He couldn't think of enough things to tack onto me. I just played it cool. Then he changed his tone. He moved up close to me. He asked me if I remembered the new square-toed slippers with the brass buckles that I had been trying to save up enough money to buy. He asked me how much more cash I had to have to get the slippers. I told him. He walked over to where his jeans were and pulled out his wallet. He took out four wrinkled dollar bills and brought them to me. He shoved the money under my nose. He said it was mine if I came across with what he wanted.
"Those slippers meant a lot to me. I grabbed the money fast and put it in a safe place in the bureau where I had a little secret hiding place in the bottom drawer. I was thrilled about the fact that now I could have the slippers. I smiled invitingly at Dad. 'Because you're such a good guy, I'm going to let you strip me,' I invited. He was hot. He grabbed my blouse and had it off my back so fast, it made my head swim. He almost ripped my bra off in his hurry, but he managed to get it down without ruining things. Then, he unzipped my short skirt and had my panties down around my ankles as he pulled the skirt off. He wasn't wasting any time. Then he got his first jolt.
"Christ!" He snarled like an animal. 'Why the hell didn't you tell me you were flying the flag!' He shook his head as he stared at me.
"I've got other ways to make you happy," I said. I leaned down and let my lips flick across his dick. I straightened up and led him to my bed. I gently pushed him back and he let me do it. Then, I lay across his waist and I dropped my mouth down to home-plate. I hadn't sucked anybody off in my life, but I had read enough about it to know what to do. I found that I liked the taste. I began running my tongue around the head and letting it work into the little hole at the very end of his dick. I tried some other little tricks. I let my tongue lick the bottom of his dick all the way to the balls. Then, I'd take one ball right into my mouth and suck. I alternated between the two balls and then I'd work back along the length of his hot rod and start sucking the big head. He started shivering and shaking. I was pretty proud of the way I could steam him up. I wanted to give him his full four dollars worth, and so every time he was about to come, I'd pull away and let him simmer down enough for me to start all over again. I stole some looks at his face while I was blowing him and he was in seventh heaven. His mouth was wide open and he was gasping for air. He had his eyes closed and he rolled his head from side to side. I worked him over till he was wet clear around to his ass. Just for the fun of it. I licked and sucked on the cheeks of his ass to stir him up more. I had him almost to the full explosion. Then, I fastened my mouth onto his dick and sucked like a vacuum cleaner. In a great, big surge, he shot it all. I was going to spit it out but all of a sudden, I decided to swallow the whole works. And I did. I liked the taste. Something like tapioca pudding. I licked and sucked at his dick till it hung limp like a piece of string.
"Was that worth four bucks?" I whispered to him.
"It must have been. The next week, he got me to one side and said he only had two bucks on him but he'd pay me the rest later. I took him on again and this time I even supplied the rubber. I had borrowed a pack of them from a girl who was in my gym class who was humping guys all the time and made no secret about it.
"But Dad was a real chiseler. He tried to act like he had forgotten his promise to pay me more later. He tried to take me on again but for only three bucks. I told him he was going to pay the going rate or no dice.
"You're nothing but a little whore!" He looked mad enough to kill me. I started to walk away from him, but he grabbed my arm. 'Okay, okay, I'll pay!' he said. And he did, lots of times after that.
"I decided to branch out. No use putting my eggs all in one basket, I figured. I told him if any of his pals wanted a piece, they could have it, too. But the price was five bucks for them. He wasn't too keen on pimping for me, but I made him a tempting offer. I told him for each new customer, I'd blow him for free!
"That really started me in business. I had an average of three customers a week. At five bucks a throw, I was earning fifteen bucks for business and pleasure combined. I could get those guys to come in about ten minutes. If they wanted more, it was another five bucks.
"Slowly, I began getting a little smarter. I was a good-looking young chick and I was giving it to these cheap punks for five bucks. I decided to get into the big time. I asked questions and I heard about a guy who handled girls. I looked him up and told him I was interested in making a little pocket money. He sized me up and he liked what he saw.
"Look, kid," he said, as his eyes ran over my tits and down to my ass. 'I represent some important people. They don't just settle for any young piece of San Quentin quiff that comes along. Just because a gal's got nice legs and a good-looking pair of boobs doesn't mean she can cut the mustard with 'em'. He added slowly: 'How do I know you're capable?'
"Fucking's believing," I said with a little smile. 'I'll give you a preview.' I dropped my hand down to his fly and unzipped him. I pulled out his dick and it began to get hard in my hand. I was on my knees and had it between my lips. I put on a great show. I ran my tongue up and down into the opening of his dick just like I had with my dad. I worked my tongue all the way back to his balls and got my mouth into his pants to suck on them. I worked on him a long time. I thought he'd never cream, but at last he did. To show him what a good trick I really was, I swallowed his load. It tasted a little different from my dad's. But it wasn't bad. This time I thought more of rice pudding than tapioca. When I finished, he was good and limp. 'Well?' I looked him in the eye.
"Kid," he nodded approval, 'you and me are gonna make us some money!'
"He wasn't just woofin', either. He told me to call him later at a number he gave me. I did and he answered. He acted on guard until he remembered me. 'Okay, kid,' he said. 'I got your first job for you.' He gave me the name and address. 'Get there at eight sharp.' He paused. 'He'll pay you in cash. It's fifty bucks!' I gasped. That was so much more than I had made for humping my dad. 'Now, you get half and I get half,' he added. That cut the margin of profit down, but it was still good.
"I arrived at the house right on time. It was a really nice set-up. Two car garage, big front lawn, two story home. The guy had money, that was for sure. I went up to the door and rang the bell. The door opened and a fat guy who had to be about forty was there in a flashy dressing gown. I told him who I was and he let me in. He studied me under the light. 'Not bad, not bad,' he nodded. 'How old are you?' I didn't know what to say. If I told him I was only sixteen, he'd get scared, maybe. I swallowed hard and he saved me. 'Never mind. Our contract told me you were sixteen and I can see that's about right.' He led me back into the den. It was fancy, with guns and stuffed animal heads on the walls. And lots of pictures of him and other guys in hunting outfits.
"He got me a drink. It was some sort of strong brandy and I almost choked on it. But I got it down and I began to relax. He sat staring at me. I was wearing my shortest skirt and I knew it did nice things for my legs and thighs. He told me to take off my clothes and I did. I played it nice to build him up. I minced around real elegant so he could see my cute ass and tits. He started stripping. He was even fatter than I thought. He had tits almost as big as mine. He was soft and white from the neck down. Pretty soon, he got a whip. I had heard of these boys who got their jollies by whipping girls. I didn't like the idea at all: But the whip turned out to be a phony. It was made of soft, black cotton. He handed it to me. He also handed me one of those big hunting hats, like the Australians wear. He liked the way it looked on me. He pulled me to a full length mirror in the bathroom and I looked at myself. I really shaped up pretty sharp that way. The big broad-brimmed hat was tipped at an angle and my face and body were set off great. The whip gave me a certain special look too. I began to like the idea better.
"He led me back out and got a dog collar that he put around his neck. He explained to me: 'You're the hunting master. I'm your faithful hunting dog.' He got down on his hands and knees and started acting like a dog. He bounced around, growling, snapping and all the rest. He told me to snap the whip over him. I did and of course, it didn't hurt, being so soft. He ordered me to pretend to whip him hard. I did and he acted like a dog would. He whimpered and cowered. Then, he crept up to me and started licking my feet. He licked up to my ankles and then up to my knees', up to my thighs and then he was licking my snatch. He went at it just like an animal would. He growled and whined as he sucked me. He ran his tongue way up inside of my cunt. I started having an orgasm. He never stopped. I counted my orgasms and had seven before he quit for air. Then he said we would trade parts. He was the big hunter and I was the dog. I gave him the whip and hat and I took the collar. I had to do the whole bit on him. I crawled on the floor but I skipped the part about licking his feets and legs. I started on the knees and worked up quickly. I was anxious to get my money and go home. I didn't want to be out too late. I had told my mom I was going to the library and it closed at nine. So I worked his dong over fast but good. He had a very small one. Less than half the size of my dad's. But I got him going and he shot his load. Not really a load. He shot very little compared to what I used to catch from Dad. I began to think that maybe I should've paid Dad instead of him paying me!
"Once he had had his kicks, it was over fast. He got dressed and I put my clothes back on. He handed me five ten dollar bills and thanked me very politely. Just like that! It had to be the easiest and pleasantest fifty I had ever earned. Well, not really fifty. I still had to pay my agent half. It seemed unfair all of a sudden. I did all the work and my pimp picked up just as much. I knew than that I'd be going into business for myself soon. But I wasn't ready yet. I had to build up a list of customers first.
"The next night I had another assignment. This was a dark Italian-looking guy who was about thirty. He was husky and hard. He was tough, too. He lived in a not-so-good neighborhood about ten blocks from my house so I walked over. I went up to the second floor where his room was, and buzzed. The door opened two inches and this cold eye looked out. I told him my name and he let me in.
"As fancy as the other place had been, this one was dumpy. There was one room and a bathroom and a small kitchenette. The rent couldn't have been more than sixty a month. I even wondered if I would get paid. He must have read my mind, because he took out a wallet and handed me a fifty dollar bill. 'I pay as I go, doll.' He didn't stall around. He stepped close to me and I felt my sweater coming off over my head. In less than I minute I was stripped naked. He walked around me, sizing me up. He kept making little grunts. I couldn't tell if he liked me or not, but I stood nice and straight with my tits up proudly. He began taking off his clothes.
"I was glad I had brought rubbers along. This guy looked like he could knock up a harem. He had muscles like a weightlifter. And hairy! He must've been part gorilla. But it wasn't till I saw his dick that I realized my dad was still a beginner. This guy's dick hung down a good seven inches from his balls. And as it started stiffening, it kept growing. It didn't stop stretching till it stood out straight and thick. A good ten inches!
"I got jittery when he started toward me and I told him he better put on a rubber. 'Why?' He eyed me with this narrow look. 'You think you get kids out your ass?' He didn't bother with build-up. He grabbed me with his big hands and spun me around. He shoved me to my hands and knees. Then, I felt it. His massive dick was trying to get into my asshole!
"He worked it around and around. It wouldn't go in. He started muttering curses under his breath. He got off me and went into the bathroom and came out with a big jar of vaseline in his hand. He scooped up a generous glob with the other hand and started smearing it up my ass. I was afraid it wasn't going to work. He was too big and thick for little old me. But I didn't want to get him sore, either. He looked like the kind of guy who could be trouble.
"He finished lubrucating my hole and then he got into position to let me have it again. And to my surprise, he worked it up inside! The vaseline had done the trick. I won't say it didn't hurt. I wasn't too used to that kind of stuff. But he was. He knew how to angle his dick so it could get in. He started working it back and forth into me. And slowly, my muscles began to take it better. I even started wiggling my ass a little to give him a kick. He had to stop now and then, because he was getting close to coming. I could feel the heat coming from his hard, hairy frame. He was over me like a blanket. Then, he finally blew. It felt like a firehose going off inside me. He really pounded and fucked then. I could hardly keep in position with all that weight bearing down.
"Finally, it was over. He started pulling his dick out of my ass and I swear he must've pulled out yards before he finally 'splooshed' out. That's the noise, exactly, 'Sploosh!' He motioned for me to get dressed. I was done for the night. He hadn't touched my tits once. He hadn't gotten any closer to my snatch than my butt. But he was satisfied. 'Don't you want to play with my tits....or something else?' I wanted to give him his money's worth. He shook his head to indicate he wasn't interested. 'I'm a Greek, kid,' he said. 'I was born in Athens and came over here when I was eight. But I was there long enough to learn the Greek way. There's no pussy in the world that can come close to a nice tight ass!' He thought to himself a second. 'I guess I'm what you'd call a queer Greek, because I don't go for boys. I like girls!' He winked at me and then I finished dressing and left.
"In all my time as a call girl, I didn't think I ever once met a guy who wanted to do it like it was supposed to be done. Every one had some little hang-up. Some had bigger hang-ups than others. Like, one Sunday afternoon I had a customer who set up a meeting with me at three o'clock in his apartment. Now, that had to be the classiest place of all. It was a penthouse apartment. No neighbors up there. They were all below! The place looked like the kind of apartment you see in the decorating magazines. First, you had to go through an entry hall that was as big as our whole house. There were big, expensive paintings on the wall. I saw names on those paintings that I had seen in the Modern Art section of our museum. And these weren't copies. They were the real thing. After I went through the hall I found myself in a living room to end them all. It was at least fifty feet long and nearly as wide.
"The guy who lived there looked exactly like you think he would. He was about forty and really good-looking. He had thick, wavy blond hair and a smooth, tanned skin. When he smiled, his teeth practically glistened. He was wearing what they call a smoking jacket, but he wasn't smoking.
"He treated me like I was a guest rather than just a fuck. He led me to a seat on the big divan near the fireplace and asked what I would like to drink. I couldn't make up my mind. Actually, all I really wanted was a cold soft drink or something like that, but I didn't dare ask for that in such plush surroundings. While I was wondering what to ask for, he suggested I try a certain wine that he had just gotten that week. 'One of the better years,' he said. He brought out a bottle and some glasses, and made a lot of fuss opening the bottle. He poured a tiny bit into his glass and then tasted it before he poured my glass full. We sipped and I have to admit it was something else. It was fragrant....you could almost smell the fresh grapes. It made me feel warm inside as I drank it. We each had another glass and then he offered me a cigarette. I wasn't much for smoking, but I wanted to seem sophisticated so I took one.
"I was there at least forty-five minutes before he suggested we undress. I slipped out of my things and he walked around to admire me. 'A lovely body, my dear. Exciting.' He admired me for another couples of minutes and then he started to take off his clothes. But not all of them. He kept his shorts on. I wondered why. But I had learned not to ask questions. He disappeared for a moment or two and then he came back. He started strapping a great big rubber dick on over his shorts. He did it very calmly and I just stood there staring at the strange sight. When the rubber cock was in place he came over to me. He lifted my face up so that he could look into my eyes. He began gently patting my cheek and smiling at me. All of a sudden, he pulled back his hand and slapped me hard across the face. I gasped in pain and surprise. He slapped me hard again. 'Now, you filthy slut,' he said, 'get down on your knees and eat my cock!' He forced me down and waved the big rubber cock in front of my face. I didn't know what to do so he did it for me. He grabbed me by the hair and forced my head back and as I opened my mouth to cry out, he rammed the big rubber device all the way down my throat so I almost choked. Then he kept working it in and out of my mouth as he kept muttering for me to 'Eat it, you bitch! Eat it! Suck on it, hear? Suck with all your might!' I had to do what he wanted, so I went through the motions.
"After a few minutes of this, he made me get on my back and then he rammed the rubber dick up into me. He shoved it up as far as it would go and then he started humping. All the time he was humping, he kept murmuring into my ear. 'How do you like a real king-sized cock in your dirty hole, huh? How do you like it?' He acted like a real nut now. He kept banging that big rubber dick up into my cunt. I had to take it. I was afraid to give him any trouble. He had this crazy look in his eyes and I was wishing I had never kept this date.
"But the big switch was later. After we were finished to his satisfaction, he got dressed and so did I. He was the perfect gentleman again. He insisted I have more wine and he paid me in a subtle way. He handed me a sealed envelope and he said it was a little token for 'the pleasure of your visit, my dear."
"When I got safely outside and downstairs, I opened the envelope to check if he had really put in my fifty bucks. He hadn't. There was no fifty dollar bill inside. Instead, there was a brand new crisp one hundred dollar bill! As I started for home, all of a sudden I felt sorry for him. Really sorry.
"When I was about seventeen I went into business for myself. I was sick of paying half of all I earned to that cheap pimp who lined up my customers. I had enough steady work to keep me busy. I was even saving a little. I used to give my mom a twenty or even a fifty dollar bill now and then. I told her I was working as a model and could afford it. She wanted to know where my pictures would be but I said my work was mostly for the wholesale dress trade and that the dresses and things I modeled were only used to help sell customers who were too far away to come in for personal showings. She believed me. My father didn't.
"He got me aside once when I had given my mom a fifty dollar bill. 'Hey, big lady,' he said with this wise look on his face. 'How about helping your poor underprivileged dad out, too?' I played it cool. 'How much do you need?' I asked him. 'It isn't money I want,' he said. 'I'd like a piece of ass. You've been peddling it all over town, how about letting me in on a little bit of it? After all, I was the one who gave you your first break!'
"I told him I sure remembered the first break he gave me. And because I did, my fee was fifty buck to him, just like to any other customer. T get it,' he said. 'You're setting up the fifty buck angle because you know I haven't got it.' He studied me. 'It proves what I always knew. Nobody can satisfy you like I can! Nobody!' I gave him a look that would curl the hair on a brass monkey. 'Bull!' I said. 'B-U-L-L!' I spelled it out for him. 'And I'm too much of a lady to finish the rest of the word!'
"He kept needling me. He said I was in love with him and that all my hustling was just to help me forget him. He claimed I pretended like it was the money I wanted, but I really wanted to put him out of my mind. He was obviously sold on this idea. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I had to laugh and I did, right in his face. That made him sore. He said he'd prove to me that I really was in love with him. I told him to start proving. He held up his hand and swore that he would. All of a sudden, I got this funny feeling that maybe he was right. Maybe I really was in love with my father-the first man who ever fucked me!
"I found out two weeks later. One night, I had just taken a hot bath and was relaxing in my own little apartment. I was earning good money, but I didn't believe in blowing it on too many unnecessary things. Most of my business was done at the place of the customer. I only had three or four regulars who came to see me. They were married and they didn't want their wives to know how they were cheating on the side. Anyway, when the doorbell rang, I figured it was my landlady. She used to stop by now and then to leave some message for me. She never let on that she knew what I was doing for my living, but I knew she was too smart to be taken in. She never made waves and we had this little unspoken agreement; I minded my fucking business, and she minded hers.
"I went to the door in my bathrobe. I opened it and who was there but my dear dad. 'May I come in, your royal majesty?' He could really be sarcastic when he wanted to. I didn't have much choice but to let him in. He had seen my place once or twice before. But I had gotten him out fast. This time, he walked around slowly, looking at things. I wondered what he had on that mind of his. He didn't keep it a secret long. 'You still peddling your puss for fifty bucks a throw?' he asked. I told him that I was thinking of hiking the ante, but that I hadn't made up my mind yet. He nodded approvingly.
"I couldn't keep myself from looking at him with a new perspective. Was I really-whether I knew it or not--in love with my own father? It was a wild idea, strangely exciting.
"He took out his wallet and picked out five ten dollar bills and handed them to me. I stared at him. At first, I thought he was repaying me for the money I'd been dishing out to the family. That was really a bad guess. 'Okay, doll,' he said. 'Strip down. I'm buying your pretty pussy for the night!' How about that for a kick? A call girl selling herself to her own dad. All of a sudden, I didn't want it that way. I shoved the money back at him. 'Keep it,' I said. 'I'm not interested."
"He grabbed my robe and ripped it loose. I was naked now. He took the money and rammed it savagely between my thighs. 'You take it, hear?' He grabbed me to him and started kissing me. He caught my lips and began shoving his long tongue in and out of my mouth. I tried to hold him off, but it was no use. He dropped his lips down to my tits. Here, he caught the nipples and began sucking on each of them in turn. He was so worked up, his wildness began to get me. Suddenly, I found myself liking it. He worked his face down. He was on his knees and now, he had his twisting, darting tongue going in and out of my pussy like a fiery sword. I began opening wider for him. He forced me down on the floor where he could get at me better. I was now on my back. His head was between my thighs. He was running his tongue an incredible length up into me. He must have had lots of practice at eating pussy. My thighs were encircling his head and I began to tighten my hold on him. That drove him on to greater excitement. He was sucking and drawing on my cunt and it was driving me crazy. I couldn't help myself. 'Take off your clothes,' I begged him. 'Take everything off!' I finally got him away from my pussy and ripped his clothes off. When he was naked, that set me off even wilder.
"He sat on the floor and began kissing my pussy from behind while I leaned forward and looked toward his feet. I could see his big dick standing up stiff and straight. I knew I had to eat it. I eased forward so that I was on my hands and knees. He never lost touch with my old pussy and as a matter-of-fact, he sped up his tongue going into me as I was lowering myself.
"I was just about to move my lips down to his dick when I got a good idea. I had used it on a couple of my customers and it sent them to the moon. I let my tits dangle down. Then I worked the nipples lightly across the head of his dick. I just barely let each nipple flick across. I swayed back and forth so that it created a steady and pendulum-like motion. One of my gal-pals who hustled for her living told me this was technically called 'butterflying it.' It felt great to me and I could see it was boiling Dad up but good. When I felt sure he was steamed, I let my mouth down and I ran my tongue onto his dick and wrapped it up tightly. I was a pretty good cocksucker by then and I knew what to do. I worked my tongue along the full length both top and bottom. Every so often, I would pull in my tongue and nibble with my teeth gently on his rock-hard dick. He didn't ease up on his end, though, I'll say that.
"He not only worked his tongue in and out of my pussy, but he'd pull all the way out every once in a while, and then run it all the way up the old dirt road. The Greek guy had done a great job of opening me up down there and I could take a tongue like it was a match stick.
"I got to hand it to my dad. He knew what to do too. Just as I was about to cream, he'd pull his tongue out and work my butt all over again. I was getting ready to beg him for his dick but I hated to let him know how strongly he affected me. I covered up my emotion by sucking and working his dick as I had never sucked any other. I clung like a leech to his dick. I had learned how to develop even more sucking power by breath control. Most beginning girls are too short-winded to do the job right. Not me. I even took deep-breathing exercises with just this in mind.
"To my relief, he worked loose of me and now he pulled back as he shoved me forward a couple of feet. He was still on his back looking up and I was face downward but he had a good angle on my pussy with his dick. He held my hips tightly as he inched his dick into me.
"He had another little trick here that was good. He'd lift his knees up, which hoisted me up by the belly so that my butt was lower than my chest. From this angle, he could shove way up and get to where it counted. He worked away in a nice, smooth rhythm. He must have practiced this plenty with other babes. I wondered if that heavy Puerto Rican broad had enjoyed him like this. It made me a little jealous. I determined to show him that I was better than that big, fat slob.
"I had learned another good grabber in my trade. I could tighten my pussy and then relax it. I had practiced it with bananas and I found I could mash a banana like it was rolled under a bread board. The old cunt muscles respond to training, I don't care what kind. And I had lots of strength down there. I clamped my pussy down as hard as I could on Dad's big dick. And I could feel how I had him locked in. Then I'd slowly ease up and it would let him free. But only for a second. Then I'd repeat. Each time I did it, I tried to squeeze a little harder. I squeezed as hard as I possibly could and Dad whimpered! He whimpered like a puppy. 'Give up?' I demanded. 'Give up?'
"It was like a kid game, but believe it or not we were both in dead earnest. This was a test between us. I turned my powerful pussy muscles on even tighter. I knew I could clamp like a vise. He didn't want to admit that I was better. He groaned, but he wouldn't give me the satisfaction of telling me how good I was. He resisted with that big dick and try as I would I couldn't come up with that extra little bit of pressure that would have won. I finally weakened. Then he became the aggressor. He hammered his huge dick up inside of me like a trip-hammer. He was sore and he was hot. The combination was hard to beat.
"I tried not to let go, but I had to. I climaxed. He wouldn't ease up, though. He hammered with even more ferocity. He drove it up and in and I found myself creaming all over. He had me on the ropes but good and he knew it. It gave him the control to keep from coming himself. He had me go through nine full orgasms, until he, himself, couldn't stand it any longer. He shot a load into me that would have filled a teacup!
"Only then did he relax. I was all warm and mellow inside. I was thinking differently about Dad. All the time before this I had thought of him as a no-good guy. He had been mean and all for himself. Now, he and I were lying naked together. We had our arms around each other and we were both feeling good and fucked-out. 'You were so great, darling,' I whispered, 'that I'm going to let you keep half of your fifty bucks.' The money was still lying on the floor where it had fallen after he had tried to shove it up my pussy.
"No soap, baby." he whispered. 'You're the greatest. You keep the fifty. You deserve it. You deserve ten times that much. If I had that much, I'd give it to you. I mean that."
"I realized that he really did, too. My money-hungry dad! I never thought I'd live to see the day! T don't get it,' I whispered into his ear. I kissed his ear lobes and I could feel the blood rushing to them. 'What's come over you?'
"A very simple thing." He paused. He turned my face to his and he kissed me gently. No tongue down the throat. Just a really nice kiss. T know now that I've always been in love with you. You were always the most exciting piece of ass to me. Even when I was humping other babes, I always thought about you. I pretended like it was you I was screwing. But I know now it's more than just a piece of ass."
"I was a little jolted. So Dad felt that way too! Our screwing each other didn't seem too way out, but when honest-to-God love was hooked up with it, that meant something else! He asked me how I felt about him. My real feelings. I started to explain that I thought he was just about the greatest cockman I'd ever met but that was all. Then I realized, no....that wasn't all! I, too, was in love. Real love! We were both in one hell of a hang-up. T got to level with you,' I whispered. 'That's the way it is with me, too. I'd rather have you than any other man in the world! And I don't mean just for part-time fucking. I wish we were married.' We just lay there trying to understand what had come over both of us.
"We can't get spliced, baby," he said gently, 'you know that. Even if Mom and me got divorced."
"We talked it out pretty good. And we were both smart enough to realize it couldn't be. Even if we ran away. The law was quick to catch onto stuff like that. And if we ever got tripped up, it could mean a bad time for us both from then on. People like to talk about stuff like that. So we agreed we'd work in our own love-making whenever we wanted it. And he'd get it free. He wasn't a customer any more, but my lover!
"I kissed him a tender good-night after we went through another banging. Now that we knew how we felt about each other, we did it so naturally it seemed a shame not to just keep on forever. But even a stiff cock wears down and finally we both decided to call it a night.
"In the meantime, a girl has to eat so I continued my schedule of cash-and-carry fucking with other men.
"I found myself so much in demand, it was getting to be a drag. I knew I had to be more selective. So I picked the customers I knew had money. My price went up from fifty bucks a hump. I doubled it. I now asked, and got, a hundred bucks for any call. I cut down my sessions to four nights a week. That was four bills and it was more than enough to pay for my place, all the good clothes I wanted, and eating in the best restaurants. I also gave the family a hundred or so every few weeks to ease things for Mom. Funny thing, Dad never again asked me for money. I think if his life depended on a fast loan from me, he'd have died first. I mean it!
"As life went merrily on, I found that raising the ante didn't mean the customers would necessarily be any more normal. As a matter of act, the higher-priced ones seemed to be kookier than the others.
"It was about that time that I first met up with my deep-sea diver. That had to be the wackiest experience of all. I went up to a really plush layout. It was a deluxe apartment. Even the bathroom. And that's where all the action took place, believe it or not.
"The bathroom was as large as most living rooms. The floor was French tile with hand-painted scenes of court life in old France. At first glance, the pictures appeared to be the usual old-world art bits, until you began to analyze the paintings from different angles. Every single one had some unusual aspect to it. All you had to do was put your finger over certain parts of the picture and then the whole picture was different. They all came out with some sex symbolism. The guy holding his hand to his sword; shut off the lower part and the sword became a great big dick in his hand. The elegant lady with the fan to her lips; again, by blocking off the upper part of the fan, the bottom became a nice, long dick she was kissing! It was a real game. He showed me different tricks in the pictures and I almost forgot what I was there for. But he didn't.
"He led me to the big bathtub. That was something again. It was triangular in shape. A good ten feet each way. And deeper than most. It was sunk a foot below the floor level. He ran the water. It spurted out of the elegantly embossed faucets with great force. He also added a fragrant liquid to the water that transformed it into a pale green-blue shade. The water didn't foam or bubble. But it gave a slick, smooth look to the water. Not greasy or anything like that. Just slick. That's the best word. Slick.
"As the tub filled to a depth of three feet, we stripped down. He insisted on helping me undress. When the tub was full he led me to it and he held my hand as I daintily stepped into the water. He waited till I was comfortably seated. The water came up to my neck but it was very soothing. He got in and we faced one another. Then he had me stand up with him. Our bodies were lightly coated with the smooth liquid. As we rubbed together, it really felt sexy! Our lubricated bodies slid against each other like a couple of hot eels and the whole thing gave me a sensation like I'd never had before. The sounds were the greatest. Really slurpy.
"He had me kneel with my thighs spread wide apart. Then he tood a deep breath and went under. I could feel his mouth sucking tightly to my pussy and he began running his tongue in and out. I wondered how long he could stay down. He surprised me. He was there a full two minutes before he surfaced. But after another great gulp of air, he dove down and began eating me again. He made at least forty dives before he exhausted that part of the scene. Next, he knelt with his dick under the water and I had to dive down and below and suck it for him. I wasn't too keen on it because it would mess up my hair-do, but he said he would give me another twenty-five for having it re-done. At that price, I'd have dived into a tub of crap!
"He wouldn't let me build him up to a full cream job, though. He wanted to save that part of it for my ass. With his well-oiled dick, he went up my old dirt road like he was coming home for Christmas! Only by this time, with all the ass-fucking I'd been getting, my ass was more like a four-lane freeway than an old dirt road. We fooled around in the water till it cooled down to the point where we started shivering.
"We got out and rubbed each other down good with the biggest damn towels I ever saw in my life. After that we spread some kind of soothing lotion onto each other. We were the two cleanest fuckers in town! Funny thing, once we were out of the water, he seemed to lose all interest in me. We just sat around in our bathrobes and sipped hot coffee laced with brandy, and chatted. By the time he paid me off, with extra for my hair-do--it was really late. But I had to admit it was worth all the time and effort. He turned out to be a good, steady customer. At least once a month I'd be called in for a bit of deep-sea diving. And I learned to prepare myself. I bought a water-proof bathing cap to protect my hair, but to show you what a good sport he was, he still paid the extra twenty-five each time.
".All my customers weren't that clean. There was the other end of the stick, that I'll tell you about. I only went through it once, though. From that time on, I turned anybody down who wanted that kind of action. Like somebody once said about marriage: 'A little bit of it does you for a long time.' So does the 'outhouse bunch.' That's my own name for these guys. I should've suspected something funny with this particular guy right from the start, even though he was a good-looking guy and didn't look freakish. Still, there was something off-beat about him that should've told me this wasn't going to be a straight dull fuck.
"Right after I arrived, he took me into his dining room. I had already had my supper, but he insisted I have another meal. I argued that I was full up to my neck, but he kept tempting me by pointing out all the rich, tasty delicacies that were set out on the table. I finally got tired of arguing. If earning my hundred bucks meant filling up my old bread-basket to the bursting point, I'd do it.
"He kept loading me with food. I did my best, but finally I just had to give up. I signed and relaxed on the big divan. He brought out some exotic after-dinner liqueurs, and we both had a couple. Then we got down to the business I came for. We both stripped. For an older guy, he was built pretty good. I guess he didn't always eat like he'd made me eat, because his waist was hard and flat. He kept rubbing my full belly and kissing it. He paid more attention to that than he did to my tits or twat. That should have been a tip-off.
"It must have been around eleven o'clock when I first felt the old urge. 'Excuse me,' I said politely, 'but may I use your powder rom?'
"Why?" He suddenly got excited. 'What do you want to do?' I told him as nicely as I could, even though I was kind of annoyed, that I had to take a crap. I wondered what the hell business it was of his, and I soon found out. He got a candy store look in his eyes, and said, T want you to save it for me!' I was a little shocked. I tried to find out if he meant I wasn't to flush the old John or what. 'No, no,' He shook his head. 'I want you to do it on me!'
"I didn't like the idea of it. I'm not a prude, but this was too much. I'd heard about these clowns. Some of the other gals called them 'The diaper nuts.' I told him I didn't think I'd go for it. But he suddenly turned mean on me. He grabbed me by the arm and said if I didn't do what he wanted, he'd call the cops and turn me in as having hustled him. I could tell that he meant it, so there was nothing I could do. I said I'd go along with what he had in mind.
"That made him feel better right away. He got down on his back and had me squat right over his face. He held me by the hips and he was really steamed up. His dick was stiff and throbbing.
"Come on," he panted, 'do it! Do it on my face!'
"I tightened up like a drum. I was so nervous that I couldn't do what he wanted. But he wasn't about to let me off the hook. He held onto me so that I couldn't move from my squatting position over his face. He kept telling me to relax and let my load out. I was beginning to get cramps in the thighs and legs from the position I was in, but I knew I was going to be there till hell froze over if I didn't do what he wanted.
"I strained and at last it happened. It was a weird, dirty feeling, for me, but I did it. I crapped right on his face. That's when he went crazy. He tightened his grip on my hips till I thought he'd claw the skin off. And his cock was throbbing and swelling as he shot off. The whole thing made me a little sick and I couldn't wait to get away from him and hurry to the bathroom. I made up my mind then and there, that I wouldn't take any more of these real freakish customers, no matter how much dough was in it for me.
"You ask me if I'm happy hustling my body. I don't know-what to say to that. I'm still a teen-ager. I don't know one single teen-ager who's completely happy. Come to think of it, I don't know one single adult that's happy, either! So what's the answer. Does anybody have the answer?
"One thing's for sure. If I'm not completely happy, at least I'm being unhappy in comfort. I have my own apartment-I have nice clothes. So I'm not happy.
CHAPTER SIX
Incest goes back to our primitive beginnings, and society has been quick to find methods of suppressing or controlling its practice, using survival of the species as the main argument. Inbreeding is said by geneticists to retain the undesirable recessive inherited characteristics, that is, when two non-related people produce offspring, their defects neutralize each other. But if brother and sister, father and daughter, mother and son, reproduce, the children tend to have mental and physical defects that have been carried as recessive genes by the parents.
Society also recognizes another problem with incest. Such interpersonal relationships between members of a family unit destroy the image of the traditional head of the household, the father (in the case of father-daughter incest), causing the breakdown of the basic familial setup in society. A father who is sexually familiar with his daughter obviously cannot maintain the respect of his family nor his position as head of the household. According to many psychiatrists and psychologists, there is always a subconscious rivalry between father and son, the so-called Oedipus complex, and between mother and daughter, the Electra complex. Regardless of the validity of these Freudian concepts, incest brings such factors into sometimes violent relief within the family and creates confusion and jealousy among family members.
Incest by its very nature, is difficult to control or legislate against for various reasons. The physical proximity, the basic level of mutual affection that exists within a family unit make it a breeding ground for potential sexual attraction and resultant acts of incest. The laws do exist, however, and for the most part they seem to be unrealistic. They are unique laws, too, unlike most of those modern men have drafted, since the statutes dealing with incest are based on Biblical precepts and are not, as is customary, mindful of the separation between church and state.
The dread of incest is one of the most puzzling phenomena in psychology. Ralph Linton sums it up as well as anyone (Linton, 1936, pp. 125-126) when he states: "The causes which underline such limitations on marriage, technically known as incest regulations, are very imperfectly understood. Since these regulations are of universal occurrence, it seems safe to assume that their causes are everywhere present, but biological factors can be ruled out at once. Close inbreeding is not necessarily injurious....Neither are purely social explanations of incest regulations altogether satisfactory, since the forms which these regulations assume are extremely varied. ... It seems probably that there are certain psychological factors involved, but these can hardly be strong enough or constant enough to account for the institutionalization of incest regulations ... they have probably originated from a combination of all these factors...."
So far, then, we know that somewhere in history the roots of anti-incest regulations exist, but no one has yet found out where or why or how they came into existence. No one has satisfactorily explained the great force of the taboo connected with incest, and until a solution is reached, we remain in the dark ages as far as this aspect of sex is concerned. In this book I have attempted to set forth the facts about incest, reportorially in some cases, and when possible, the effects on the persons involved. I can only delve, report, and theorize, however; I cannot solve nor change.
A note here about this book: While there are innumerable cases of incest among uncles and nieces, between cousins, and so forth, they are not covered here, being superfluous in the light of our richer exploration into the material available among persons more closely related. Our study in this book concerns brother and sister, father and daughter, and mother and son. These are the most common (in that order, it is most widely thought), and form the basis for a closer examination of the phenomenon of incest. Various cases are on record of homosexual incest, too, both male and female, but they are not treated here, as this would broaden the scope of the book so much that our purpose would be defeated by unnecessary diffusion.
A final word, before examining the subject at length, and one to keep in mind while reading this book: the cost of incest is extremely high. Society pays a dear price for its unique taboo (and the even stranger habit of clinging to it), and the individuals who step over the invisible line pay a high price indeed. It would seem that we nuture this dark taboo at all costs, with not very many good reasons why. It is a tragic indictment against our "enlightened" natures that the taboo of incest lingers so unreasonably in its present form.
Let us hope that this further light, then, may help to scrub away some of the shadows. Case History:
"My dad was the designer of most of the churches in our city. I didn't find this out until I was in college. I knew he was a busy man and an architect, but didn't know just how respected he was. He sold and bought real estate, too, and acquired wealth, though he was always fair and not greedy in business dealings. Dad was the top man in his profession and in anything else he tried. He founded some related businesses that are still prospering. He was always looking for new things, new inventions, and when they came out, he investigated them. If they were good, he saw to it that they were introduced to our town first.
"He helped establish a credit bureau; he started a wall-washing machine business, an automatic reducing salon chain, drive-in hamburger places, car-washes, and things like that. He was ahead of a lot of the rest of the country. He had his hands in a great many things and they took up a lot of his time. Dad was also a friend to people in dire circumstances. He never refused a loan, and a lot of times he saved jobs for men and women who had had their wages garnished. He helped people with their budgets, and eventually he founded a service that took charge of such chores for people who couldn't manage their money very well. He did all of these things out of a genuine desire to help people. He helped the individuals close to him first, then reached out to help as many people as he could on a larger scale. He was successful, and he was also revered by just about everyone in our town.
"Dad was affable. He met and made friends easily. He never drank too much, he was never out of line. He was a born leader, and he saw to it that people didn't forget who he was. Theodore F., my father, was a man you couldn't keep in the background. This is why he later got into politics. He may have wanted to, anyway, but at any rate he was asked. He ran for mayor and won easily. Influential people foresaw the governorship for Dad if he wanted it, and the White House even. He was backed by the churches too, and was a deacon in high standing in our own church. His fellow church members all believed him to be an exceptionally religious man.
"To everyone he appears to be the devoted father, the community and business leader, the man who can do no wrong, who is topmost in their hearts. He is an exemplary human being in the eyes of our community. There were four of us children, two boys and two girls, and I am the oldest. None of us ever heard a sour word about our father, and we were all very proud to be his children. He was the Boy Scout Code all wrapped up in one sterling package-and I guess I'm the only one who knows the part I'm about to tell.
"I can remember my father's first sexual interest in me. I was about ten or possibly eleven years old. He was trying to teach me how to shoot a bow and arrow. He stood very close to me, and I felt his sex organ touching me. He made it a point to put his arms around me and hold me close as I held up the bow with my own arms. He stood behind me, a little to the side. I felt his penis get erect and touch my buttocks, I didn't think this was right, in fact I was severely embarrassed, so I tried to pull away. But he made me hold still so he could teach me the proper way to launch the arrow. I thought maybe he didn't know that he aroused organ was touching me, and I made myself believe that, though now when I think about it, I'm not sure I was convinced, even then. I think I didn't want to feel any guilt and didn't want to think my dad was doing anything he shouldn't be doing. But it didn't stop with the archery lessons....
"He tried to teach me how to dance too, and I felt him pressing against me then. At first I thought he must be awful dumb, because I kept moving my body away from his, and he'd pull me in close so I could feel him again. The boys I danced with weren't that way, and I thought Dad was just clumsy and probably a square, too.
"Once, when we were swimming and he was horsing around with me in the pool, I noticed he got an erection and I tried to stay away from him. There were other people around and I was afraid they'd find out, and we'd be embarrassed. Dad had to stay in the pool until he cooled off. I would have laughed if I hadn't been so flustered about it. I got the feeling after several of these incidents, that Dad got that way whenever he was around me. It was a strange feeling, but I didn't try to define it or isolate it at the time. I didn't know enough then.
"Around the house, Dad usually wore only his shorts in summer, and he'd scratch himself in the crotch all the time. They were thin shorts and you could see right through them. I never actually saw him with an erection though. I'm sure Mother would have gotten very angry at him if that had happened. It was odd, I thought, that he should get an erection with his clothes on, and not when he was practically naked. But I was too young to understand what made his penis hard in the first place.
"I do remember that when Dad scratched himself in the crotch, he seemed also to be clutching his organ as though to hide it. In hiding it, though, he was just calling attention to it. It fascinated me, I guess because I wanted to see what it looked like. I had felt it underneath his clothes against my body, but never seen it. I began to have fantasies about men with exposed penises. I even stood up to urinate like men do, sometimes, just to see if I was so much different. I kept trying to forget about these things, but it didn't work. I wanted desperately to see what a penis looked like--I was dying to see Dad's.
"All of these events set me up for what was to come. I had fantasied seeing Dad's penis so often, and touching it with my hand, that when the time came, I was not shocked at all. I had, in fact, a deep sense of relief. This didn't come about for some time, though. I think I was about fourteen when I first had a sex experience with my father.
"It was summertime, and I had flunked algebra in my freshman year at high school. So I had to go to summer school to make up the credit. The rest of the kids were free, and it was my mother's custom to take us all to the beach for two weeks. That summer I couldn't go, so she left with Jimmy, Clare and Dean, and I stayed home with Dad. She cautioned my father to watch me so that I didn't stay out late and goof off while she was away. She was reassured by Dad, who promised to lay down the rules and keep me in line.
"Dad's attitude changed after Mom and my brothers and sister drove off. He seemed happy and gay. It was about an hour later that he asked me to come into the living room for a 'talk'. He started asking me all kinds of personal questions. Did I like boys? Did I ever 'fool' with them' Did I know that boys could get me into trouble? He wanted to know if any boy had ever asked me to 'do things' with him. I got very huffy about that, but he said they probably would, and then he started to talk about sex.
"By this time I knew what sex was. I had talked to a lot of girls and with some who were 'experienced.' But I really hadn't had any experiences of my own. So it was with some real interest that I listened to Dad's lecture. He said that this country was backward about sex, that in other countries they saw to it that young people learned ail about it and that girls knew how to 'protect' themselves. He mentioned Sweden and France and Italy. He told me that sexual intercourse before marriage was all right in some countries, was part of the 'getting acquainted' period of courtship. He asked me if I knew what a condom was.
"He said that was the thing to use so that I wouldn't become pregnant. But he said there were bad boys who wouldn't use them and would deliberately try to make me have a baby. Some of them, he said, even broke these rubbers so that the girl would become pregnant. He said if I was ever raped by a boy or a man, that I should make him put on a rubber first. This sounds silly to me now, but Dad was quite serious and I took it seriously at the time. From his talk, I gathered that all boys and men were out to rape me and that this was a part of life I had to accept as a girl. I wondered why my mother had never told me these things, if they were true, since she was a woman and must have gone through them herself. I also had never heard anything like this from the other girls my own age. Anyway, Dad kept talking about rubbers, describing them, and giving me a full lecture on their use.
"He told me how to test the ends of the rubbers to be sure they were intact, and mentioned that some air should be in them so that they wouldn't break inside me. It was a pretty clinical lecture for a girl of my age, and I was fascinated beyond words. From this discussion of the condoms, he turned to a full description of the penis itself. As I said, I had been fascinated by this aspect of men for some time, so I listened eagerly to what Dad had to say. When he started describing the penis I expressed some disbelief, and the conversation lagged while he groped for words to describe it. He was telling me that the blood made it hard or something like that. This was his chance to show me firsthand what he was describing, and he used the opportunity. He unzipped his trousers and brought out the subject of our conversation.
"I had been feeling strange, hot around the ears, flushed I'm sure with guilt feelings and pleasurable curiosity. I didn't want Dad to stop this fascinating discourse, but at the same time I had mixed emotions. I could tell that Dad was enjoying his role very much, too, and so we were both sharing a large secret. His voice kept getting huskier as he tried to describe his sex organ while it was lying there in full view of both of us. I knew he was getting intense pleasure out of this scene, and it made his conversation sound pretty phony. I knew we were doing wrong, but I had no desire to stop listening to him nor looking at his penis. I still recall those moments and have thought of them often over the years. I used to think of them in my masturbation fantasies, and have relied on them emotionally when having sex with my husbands and with other men.
"Anyway, Dad began describing what happened during sex to his penis. He showed me the foreskin and the head and told how the former rubbed over the latter to cause pleasurable sensations. He described how, after a lot of this pleasure, ejaculation occurred, and told me this was what planted the seed, causing girls and women to have children. While he was talking and describing these things, his penis slowly became erect. He explained this was designed by nature so that penetration inside of a woman could occur. He then demonstrated manually what he had just told me about the foreskin.
"His voice kept getting lower, but he valiantly raised it when it threatened to become a whisper.
"While he was showing me this, he suddenly reached for my hand and put it on his penis. He told me to squeeze hard. I did. Then he moved my hand up and down. He was getting very excited, I could tell, and he kept moving my hand, faster and faster. This was something I had not dreamed of even in my wildest fantasties, and I was experiencing extreme pleasure then, myself. He kept telling me to squeeze harder, and I was afraid I'd hurt him. Somehow his penis looked both formidable and delicate at the same time.
"Just before I thought he was going to ejaculate, he pulled my hand off and leaned back away from me. I felt terribly cheated. He put his penis back inside his pants and shuddered. He mumbled something about that being 'far enough for now.' It was as though he didn't want me to see the rest of it, the best part. He made me feel like a child, and though I was, I remember it made me very angry. Dad didn't say anything for several moments after he had zipped up his pants.
"Then he talked about the weather, the family, hoping they would have a good time, and various other unrelated subjects. I just sat there fuming. I wanted to see what had happened to his penis. Then the conversation dragged again and Dad looked at me a long moment. He grabbed my hand suddenly and put it on his lap. He had lost his erection, I could feel. He pushed my hand hard so that it squeezed his soft penis. While my hand was there, I felt it grow and become erect again. I was disappointed that I couldn't watch this process, but it seemed a miraculous thing to me at the time. It gave me a sense of power. All I had to do, it seemed, was to touch it and it would be ready, would rise up to the hardness I had witnessed with my own eyes moments before. But I still wanted to see more. It was the old attraction of the mysterious, the forbidden.
"When it was fully erect again, Dad took it out of his pants. He made me do the masturbation on him once more, but this time, he reached inside my panties and played with my privates. He told me to spread my legs wider so that he could touch me better. I was feeling kind of dopey by this time. Maybe there was too much for me to concentrate on at once. Anyway, I didn't think as much about his fondling me as I did about masturbating him. I did better this time, and I could see that he was glad I had learned so quickly and so well. After a few moments, he made me pull up my dress so he could see underneath. Then he pulled my panties down past my knees.
"With his hand, he stroked my vagina, matching his rhythm with my own. During this, though I didn't rationalize this way at the time, the things we were doing were mutual and had nothing to do with my education or anything else except pure pleasure. There was no turning back now. We liked each other and we both drew tremendous ecstasy from this mutual masturbation. Dad made me pull my pan tied down further and spread my legs wider apart, as he stroked my privates with his finger and hand, and I rubbed his penis with mine, He started moving his body with my hand, though, and I thought he was going to have an ejaculation. Again, however, he stopped before climax and looked away from me. He quickly put his organ back inside his pants. I really felt bothered then. He was keeping something from me. I didn't want to stop playing with him and I didn't want him to stop touching me, either.
"When he had touched my clitoris I felt good all over, and that feeling of pleasure has stayed with me all these years. When I masturbate I have to touch the clitoris or it doesn't work for me. I concealed my pleasure from my dad, as though I was punishimng him for cheating me of his orgasm. But out of this came another experience which was completely without mixed emotions on my part. That is, I felt no guilt about anything Dad and I did from then on. Dad said he had to leave then, but would see me that night, and I should stay home the rest of the afternoon. I took this as an invitation to more of the same play, and looked forward to more pleasures with my father that night.
"A feeling of warm anticipation began to build up in me toward evening. When Dad came home he didn't mention the late morning's happenings, nor did he talk about sex any more during supper. Not until it was bedtime did I really know that what I wanted to happen was finally going to happen. We both undressed for bed, he in his and Mother's bedroom, and I in mine. I was just getting ready to pull down my covers and get into my bed, when Dad appeared in the doorway.
"He told me to come into his and Mother's bedroom. He took my hand in his and I followed him. I had no bad feelings, no guilt whatsoever. I was surging with excitement inside, yet it all seemed so easy and natural. I would have been disappointed if he hadn't have come for me in this way. I guess I wanted to take my mother's place with Dad, and expected it with a passion at this point.
"I didn't force anything that happened, though. I was completely docile and willing to do all that he told me to do. He pulled down the covers and had me get on Mother's side of the bed. I hopped in fast, in case he was thinking of changing his mind. He lay down next to me, but kept his distance. Then he reached over and put his hand inside my pajamas. I felt a thrill surge through me as he repeated his motions of the morning. I reached over, without his asking me, grabbed his penis and began stroking it. He moved closer to me and began picking up the conversation of before. He wanted to 'teach' me what really happened when a boy and girl or a man and a woman made love, although he called it 'intercourse."
"He told me about the positions of the man and woman during sexual relations. Then he proceeded to show me. He made me spread my legs wide. All this time, he had been instructing me as to what I should do and I had been minding him as though I was a small girl being told how to clean house. But there was a change in me when he got on top of me, because I began to hold back my true feelings of desire and pleasure. I held back at this point, even though I had withheld little when we mutually masturbated.
"Dad was still 'instructing' me. He moved his penis over the lips of my vagina, and he made an up-and-down motion as well, without penetrating me. He said he didn't want to enter me because he didn't want to 'spoil' me for my husband. He said a marriage could be ruined if anyone had previously entered me beyond a certain point. His desire grew in him, though, and he proceeded into the next steps of his instruction.
"He said he would show me a condom and explain how it was used. He went to the bathroom and brought back two rubbers. Then he turned on the light and showed them to me. He took the band off of one of them and sat down on the bed next to me. Then he rolled the condom over his erect penis, leaving air in the tip, so that it looked like a piece of collapsed bubble-gum. He told me this was important so that the rubber wouldn't break and cause me to become pregnant. I was thrilled about this, because I felt that finally he was going to enter me and that I would find out what an ejaculation was like.
"He turned off the light, but he didn't take the condom off. I knew then that he was going to do it to me, and I smiled to myself in the dark. I felt my hopes rise that he would have an ejaculation and that I would feel it. He got right on top of me again, then. I just lay still with my legs straight, though I knew what he wanted me to do. He had to ask me to spread my legs apart again. I spread them only a little at first, so he would have to ask me to spread them wider. I was pushing some of my guilt onto Dad and acting the innocent little girl who was being seduced. Secretly I was wild with desire, and the hot feelings of pleasure inside me threatened to break through. I was so consumed with passion then, that I grabbed his penis and put it against my vagina.
"It seemed as though my whole body was shaking when he started doing it again. I was probably holding myself rigid, though, still holding back from Dad my expressions of pleasure. He started his back-and-forth motion, but was faster this time. Then he told me something I've heard countless times since then from boys in school, and I understand it's classed as one of the biggest and most common lies in the world. He said he was just 'putting the head in'. He asked me if it hurt. It didn't, but he told me to tell him if it hurt the least little bit and he would stop. I think now that that's the second biggest He. I never new a man who could stop once he got past that point with a woman. But anyway, Dad felt underneath me several times to see if there was any bleeding. After each check he would mutter something that showed me he was relieved. Then he would continue his slow and cautions endeavors.
"He kept asking me if it felt good, if I enjoyed it. He was almost begging. I still played the innocent. I was blazing with lust and going out of my mind with pure ecstasy, but I told him I felt nothing at all. I didn't move my hips or anything. I just lay still and let him perform and plead with me for assurance that he was exciting me. He thought there must be something wrong. He was still holding back. He seemed pretty nervous as well as worried about his prowess as a male. He said most women would be begging him to go all the way in by now. He shook his head and seemed puzzled. I didn't like his talking about other women and I knew he meant Mother too, so I took perverse joy in denying him any satisfaction from comparisons. And all the time I was eliminating my own guilt by letting him do everything.
"Dad's desire kept mounting and finally his strokes got closer together and he had an ejaculation, I could feel his body shudder and he gave a great sigh, and said, 'oh, oh, darling!' This was my first such experience with a man's climax, and I had no doubt that's what Dad was having. His excitement built up, then ebbed like a tide. He tensed up after a few moments and rolled away. I just lay there stiffly, my thoughts racing. I was glad I had made him go all the way, and felt I had learned more of the mystery that he had withheld from me before.
"Afterwards, he took me into the bathroom and looked for blood on me. He checked the sheets very carefully. He was visibly relieved when he saw that there was no sign of bleeding. He took the condom off and showed me the fluid in the head of it. He explained that this was the seed that could make me pregnant. He seemed quite proud of his role as lecturer again, as teacher. He washed out the condom with warm water while I watched him. So that's what all the mystery was about, I thought. Then we both went back to bed and he fell asleep right away. I could hear him snoring real low, next to me. I couldn't sleep for a long time, and then my dreams were full of what had happened that day, and they were extremely pleasant.
"I slept with Dad the whole time Mother was gone, right up until the night before she came home. During that time, Dad was very careful not to break my hymen. I believe this would have made his own guilt unbearable and more real to him. Perhaps he thought that if someone was to find out, Mother, for instance, I would be taken to a doctor and examined. If the hymen was intact, his denials of sexual intercourse would stand up. So, he took great care not to break my maidenhead, and this left me frustrated, nervous and angry. Because, while he was protecting himself and perhaps both of us,, his panic at not going inside me any deeper prevented me from experiencing the supreme pleasure, a complete orgasm.
"As a consequence, I was disappointed with sex. I felt that Dad didn't trust me enough to keep our secret. I thought he was afraid I'd tell Mother, and later my husband, who would ask how I'd lost my virginity. Dad's fear also communicated itself to me and built up my own feelings of guilt. It was a very unsatisfactory relationship and of course has colored all my subsequent relations with other men. That I derived pleasure from these relations with my father, I cannot deny, but the pleasure wasn't complete.
"I was making him pay for my frustration by holding back on him, but this injured me too. Now that I'm older, I feel that had I responded as he wanted me to, and as I could have very easily, Dad would have thrown caution to the winds and broken my hymen. At least I would have experienced an orgasm.
"I don't know how the relationship would have gone on, however, had that occurred. When Mother got back, Dad was distant to me-except when Mother was far enough away so that he didn't feel he would be betrayed by any undue demonstration of affection. Then he would 'cop a feel' and sometimes he'd ask me to touch his penis inside his pants. When I did this, he would get an erection. As soon as he did, he got very nervous and left me with a weak smile on his face. One day I told Dad to stop it, and he never came to me again with any of his requests. I regretted it, but thought he should be punished for teasing me.
"This early sex experience had a harmful effect on my own initiative with men. Because I had played such a passive role with my father, I thought this was the way to do with all men. So, while I would be sexually aroused with certain men, I just waited for them to do what Dad had done. I'm sure a lot of them thought I was a stupid cluck. I never discussed sex with these men nor gave them any encouragement. When a man would start his preliminary sex-play I wouldn't stop him. Then he'd go a little further, and it always ended up the same. I let him insert his organ-but only up that point that my father had allowed his own penis to penetrate."
Nancy F.'s case history doesn't end here, although her account of the incest with her father does. She married at sixteen and that marriage was, as could be expected, a dire failure. She had many relations with men, but until analysis aided her in her understanding, they were almost all of them repeats of her first acts with her father. She made her partners perform as her father had, and needless to say, most of her partners refused to put up with her behavior for long.
Nancy's case is notable as being similar to many other cases of father-daughter incest where the daughter is more active in the seduction than the public would like to believe. Nancy feels no animosity towards her father at this time, but she is regretful that he was so weak in their relationship. Her present husband is an opposite type, but she seems to harbor no fears that incest will develop within her own family should she have daughters as a result of this marriage.
It is of importance to note the prominence that ejaculation plays in Nancy's sex relations. She long felt that whatever it took to cause ejaculation in a man was of prime importance, and a singular need within her. Once she herself, as she believed, had caused her male partner to have an orgasm, then she was completely satisfied. She has now gained considerable insight into these dynamics and is more emotional toward her marriage partner, whereas before she had merely taken the role of manipulator.
The case of Terry S. comes up again here, because this neurotic and criminally inclined individual who had incest with his sister (see Part One) as a rebellious act against society, later married and had incest with his stepdaughter. Legally, this is the same as though the daughter were a blood relation, and in Terry's mind was every bit as forbidden. A look at his case history provides a continuing study of incest coupled with general anti-social behavior, that while extreme, probably is not isolated or rare.
To escape his family environment, Terry enlisted in the Army. He served in the Pacific during World War Two and continued his pathological behavior in the service. However, an incident occurred which caused a severe eruption of his neurosis and resulted in his being medically discharged with a code designation of psychoneurotic.
After days and weeks of heavy fighting in the jungles of Guadalcanal, Iwo Jima and Tarawa, Terry was emotionally overwrought. He describes himself as "ready to fly apart, to kill everyone in sight, not only the enemy." While returning to camp one day from a patrol, the incident which caused him to lose his restraint occurred. A fight broke out in the G.I. prisoners' compound. This was a temporary stockade for cowards, disciplinary cases (insubordination, etc.) and men who had committed one crime or another while at the front. But as Terry walked by, the M.P.'s began firing inside the stockade, most of them with Thompson submachineguns. The screams of the dying men and the sound of gunfire so close were too much for Terry. He went beserk and was very nearly killed, himself. He was forcibly restrained and had to be given strong sedatives by the Army medics.
His violence became so uncontrollable after that, that he was shipped back to the States and given a medical discharge but no pension. This caused Terry to feel quite bitter about the Army in particular and added to his hatred of authority. According to his own testimony, Terry felt physically fine after his discharge and was only haunted by nightmares of the incident which had set him off. Shortly afterwards, he went to a town where his family had migrated, and married a local girl, Deborah, who was a divorcee with two daughters.
Terry's sister Helen had married in the meantime, and this was probably one of the reasons why Terry rushed into marriage with Deborah. Deborah was older than Terry and, unknown to him at the time, was what used to be known as a "loose woman". Deborah's oldest daughter was named Dorothy. She was about sixteen when Terry first had sexual relations with her. He describes this act and his feelings at the time of the incest in an interview:
"I had been drinking in a lot of bars after I got out of the Army. I met Deborah in one of them and found that she was a drinker too. I laid her a few times following these bar sessions, and because I was lonely and wanted to get a family of my own, I asked her to marry me. I liked her kids, her two daughters, and said I'd make a good father to them. Deborah said okay and we got married right away. He still drank a lot and went out to the bars whenever he had money, which was usually on paydays only.
"Naturally, sometimes we'd both get drunk and Deborah got very argumentative after a snootful. We'd have a fight and I'd walk away from it. I'd had a bellyfull of that stuff. I'd go home and she'd come staggering in at some ungodly hour. I was usually passed out and didn't know if she came home with a man or alone in a cab. I had my suspicions though I never brought them up. That would have led to more quarreling and I didn't want any.
"I liked Deborah's oldest girl a lot. She was a sweet thing, Dorothy, about sixteen. Her sister Jennie was about seven and quiet, well-behaved. But Dorothy was like her mother, brazen, sure of her womanness, and obviously had hot pants like her old lady. Something happened when we first looked at each other. We both knew something was going to happen. I wanted to be a father to Dorothy, but from the first, she didn't treat me at all like she should have. She'd give me a wink, slide up to me. It was more than a man could stand.
"But I held out for a long time. I think if Deborah and I had gotten along better I wouldn't have done anything with her daughter. But the fights and the drinking kept getting worse, and one night I just said the hell with it and went ahead full steam. We went out as usual to hit the bars and get plastered, only this time I didn't guzzle the beer down as usual. I paced myself and watched Deborah get drunker and drunker. That alone was a revelation to me. I saw her flirt with the other guys, and they were a hard-drinking crew. She let her skirt ride up over her knees, and there were few who missed her open flirtations. I caught myself looking at her panties underneath her dress, and knew every stiff in the joint was trying to get a better look, too. Well, the usual crap began. The argument. I went along with it and pretended to be stoned and mad. But I was anxious to get away. Yet I didn't want to arouse her suspicions. I wanted to get home and make it with Dorothy. And when I got my chance, that's just what I did.
"I grabbed some bottles of beer at the liquor store on my way home, and some potato chips and dip. I wanted to have a party with Dorothy. I think Dorothy must have known I'd be back early because she had put her sister to bed early and had the radio on. She seemed to be in a party mood. She acted surprised to see me, but glad too. She asked me first what I was doing home so early and where her Mother was. Then I asked her if she wanted to have a party with me, and she giggled and nodded.
"Well, we had a few beers and laughed and talked, and when I saw that she was relaxed enough I said we'd better take a drive. She seemed to understand what I meant and it was as though .she was an adult, not a sixteen-year-old girl at all. I didn't want to stay there in the house, her sis might wake up, Deborah could come home early, or anything. So we took some beer with us and headed out to a lonely road I knew outside of town.
"When we stopped, she giggled some more and we had some more beer. Then I put my arm around her. It was like lightning struck her. She moved over next to me and kissed me. Then I french-kissed her, sticking my tongue deep into her mouth. She came right back with hers. I got an erection and pulled her hand over so she could feel it. I thought she might flinch and pull her hand away, but she didn't. She squeezed me and I kept kissing her. I thought of Deborah back in the bar boozing, and I thought of all the drunken times, the fights, the flirting, and my mind pictured her screwing those other guys, and suddenly I knew I had to take Dorothy and pay Deborah back. I was hot, sure, but I was also thinking of getting even with Dorothy's mother.
"I put my hand on Dorothy's leg and then lifted her skirt and put my hand underneath. Her panties were moist and I knew she wanted me. I just about flipped when she started to pull the zipper down on my fly. Then her hand was inside my pants and around my penis. I almost had an orgasm right then. I squeezed her breasts then, and laid her back on the seat. I pulled my pants down. She was panting and sighing and calling me by name, saying how much she wanted me.
"I pulled her panties down and climbed on top. I didn't care about getting her pregnant or anything else just then. I wanted to take her and get it done with, so that I could sit back and gloat. I wanted to look at Deborah's face every time she gave me some of her crap and think to myself: 'I've been sleeping with your daughter, you bitch!'
"It was quick. And we did it a couple more times before I said we'd better get home. Dorothy was nervous afterwards, but she caressed my penis on the way home. She hadn't been a virgin, and I was grateful for that, though it took some of the steam out of my revenge on Deborah. I had a moment of dread when we drove up to the house. I was afraid Deborah had somehow found out and was waiting for us with a pistol or something. But she wasn't home. I kissed Dorothy good-night, told her I loved her, which I did, and we went to bed. But I couldn't sleep. When Deborah finally staggered in about three that morning I just laughed to myself. She piled into bed and I felt nothing but a sense of revulsion toward her. All I could think of was Dorothy's young and tender body. I've never gotten over that first time, though we made love frequently after that."
The incident of Terry's rebellion involving his step-daughter has eloquently served its purpose here. There are few further points worth mentioning, however, before we leave Terry S. with his shattered life. His wife Deborah never found out about her daughter's sex relations with her husband, or if she did, she never mentioned it to Terry. One day she just walked out, and by this time they had had two daughters and a son of their own. They had been married for eight years. Deborah became a prostitute. She gave Terry no explanation for leaving, although he thinks it was because of his long periods of depresssion, which began shortly after he first indulged in incest with Dorothy.
Terry turned to crime and was involved in a bogus-check-cashing ring. Apparently he never graduated to the more violent manifestations of psychopathy such as armed robbery, muggings or the like. His nature was such that he was incapable of direct action against society, preferring to take out his hostility in more subtle ways. His hatred for his fellow-man of course was also hatred for himself, and accounts for the many periods of depression that Terry had and still has.
He was always involved in sneak attacks on society, rather than open, violent, direct aggression. Psychiatrists recognize this type of criminal as a separate and distinct psychopathic category, but penologists have been slow to catch up with this thinking. At any rate, Terry was convicted and sentenced to prison, but escaped long-term incarceration by manifesting psychotic tendencies. He tried to take his life and was remanded, because of his medical discharge, to psychiatric care through the facilities of the Veteran's Administration. His sullen moodiness and another attempt at suicide caused him to be returned to the custody of state authorities, however, and he was eventually taken to a harsher institution.
That was the general pattern of Terry's behavior, but it was still another incident that caused him to go over the line again. This was an affair with his brother's wife, a thing not usually classed as incestuous. He all but ruined what had been a happy marriage up to that time by this slash at authority and society. His children, by Deborah, were made wards of the court, and have histories of anti-social behavior like their father. At this writing, Terry S. has not solved any of his problems, and now follows a pattern of working sporadically at odd jobs. He works until he is fired for drinking and/or absenteeism, or until he quits. He goes through long periods of isolation, with heavy alcoholism, followed by equally long periods of gloomy depression.
Drinking is one of the symptoms of Terry's illness, but his manifestations of neurosis (if not psychosis at times-always involve sex). He is thought by his analysts to be a repressed homosexual, but he has never faced this directly in analysis. He used his brother's wife, it is felt, as a medium for his homosexual desires for his brother. He knew his wife was a prostitute and yet enjoyed sexual relations with her. These are recognized by many psychiatrists as proxy situations for homosexual outlets.
Terry's is not an easy neurosis to unravel or to cure. As Terry is into middle age now, it is un-likely that he will stay with psychotherapy long enough to understand the dynamics of his illness. He moves around a great deal, changing towns, but not necessarily his type of environment-which is one step above skid road, and sometimes directly on skid road. He considers his life a failure, but prefers to think of himself as a victim of circumstances, and does not feel he had had any direct hand in provoking the ill fortune that has befallen him.
Alcohol seems to have played a role in father-daughter incest for a long time. In the Old Testament, Lot unwittingly lay with his daughters after they had gotten him drunk. I quote the part of Genesis, Chapter 19, that tells this story:
And Lot went up out of Zoar, and dwelt in the mountain, and his two
daughters with him; for he feared to dwell in Zoar: and he dwelt in
a Cave., he and his two daughters.
And the firstborn said unto the younger, Our father is old, and
there is not a man in the earth to come in unto us after the manner
of all the earth:
Come, let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him,
that we may preserve the seed of our father.
And they made their father drink wine that night: and the firstborn
went in, and lay with her father: and he perceived not when she lay
down, nor when she arose.
And it came to pass on the morrow, that the firstborn said unto the
younger, Behold, I lay yesternight with my fathers let us make him
drink wine this night also; and go thou in, and lie with him, that
we may preserve the seed of our father.
And they made their father drink wine that night also: and the
younger arose, and lay with him; and he perceived not when she lay
down, nor when she arose.
Thus were both the daughters of Lot with child by their father.
SUMMARY:
In summing up the foregoing cases of father-daughter incest, we may draw some conclusions. The common denominator among fathers who institute an incestuous relationship with their daughters (or daughters-in-law) seems to be that they all are sexually weak. The evidence points to a psychopathological "endogamic" type of paternal incest offender. He is a weakling in his own family, and hasn't the character strength to find his sexual gratification outside of the family confines.
The mental health of these paternal offenders may or may not be an issue. We know so little about the taboo of incest that we don't know whether the offender is made neurotic by the force of the taboo or whether he was neurotic in the first place. It might make a significant difference if we knew more about the taboo of incest than we now do.
Terry S., we must conclude, is an exceptional case, though we can't vouch for the rarity of such cases. The cultural level of the fathers in these cases seems to be high, while most of the general public's knowledge of incest is gleaned from the cases of those offenders who happen to be arrested. These latter usually are closely questioned by police, social workers and psychiatrists. A pattern of environment emerges from these cases that is quite misleading. All fathers who have incest with their daughters are not necessarily sub-normal human beings, intelligence-wise.
We would hesitate very strongly then, to conclude that all paternal incest offenders come from crowded homes, poor living situations, etc., or even that a majority do. It is much more reasonable to assume that many more cases of incest occur than ever appear in court.
However, the only way society will ever learn about itself, is to question itself, and as of now, incest still involves such a powerful taboo that our records are pathetically inadequate. We have been content to present a wide variety of common types of incest in our present-day literature, without critically examining our present laws regarding it. As it stands now, not many families in our society really have any protection or insurance against incest occurring within their own numbers, this is one of the largest unrecognized paradoxes facing us in our society today.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Christina B. currently makes a living by posing for pornographic pictures. In addition to this she has acted in stag films and given performances at parties. Aware of the evils of her profession she has sought the aid of one of the best known psychiatrists in Europe, a Stuttgart based doctor, aging now, who was a student of Freud's in Vienna. Since he possesses a remarkably retentive memory this doctor did not need to consult his records. He could quote freely, offering names, incidents and details, without once referring to his records.
Pursuit of the orgasm is not unusual, he told us. Many of his female patients undergo analysis just to cure this problem. Christina B., for instance, enlists the aid of inanimate objects, animals, men, women and fantasies to bring on a climax. This relieves the pressures of her existence and is akin to taking drugs.
At my request a meeting was arranged with Christina B. We found her to be young, twenty-seven, pretty, fairly intelligent, and quite talkative. She held nothing back. However, prior to face-to-face introduction we were forced to employ some subterfuge and thus met Christina at 'work'. This was the scene:
Posing as buyers of blue films we were admitted to a shuttered nightclub. The atmosphere was one of silence and darkness. Fat men of the prosperous business type sat smoking cigars. In one corner a cameraman looking bored leafed through a magazine while his assistant set up lights. We noticed that three young people, a man and two girls lounged against a white-washed wall. Then two husky workmen set up a bed near them. The lights were adjusted and the young trio came to life and shucked their clothes. The cameraman took a reading, his assistant measured distance with a tape and everything was in readiness. There was no run-through, no shouts of 'lights, action, camera'. The palyers simply performed realistically.
One girl was blonde and slender. When she undressed stripping off flesh colored bra and panties we saw that her breasts were quite large, the nipples huge. Her waist was tiny, her hips fully curved, her buttocks a good round handful. She walked beautifully, like a trained model and the buyers watching murmured their approval.
The other woman was of average height but largely proportioned. We expected to see as she removed her clothing a Brunhildian torso, buxom bottom, melon-like breasts and full hips. Instead she moved lazily, almost slouchy as she peeled off her skirt and sweater and tossed them carelessly on the floor. Her underwear followed and when she straightened, tiny apples bounced on her rather broad chest. Her waistline was non-existent, she had a rolling belly, fattish thighs and ungainly legs. When she presented her backside to the audience it looked strange for the cheeks belonged to a skinny girl, being slightly larger than halfed grapefruit although she was a hippy girl. This was Christina B.
We discussed her appearance among ourselves and in that second that we looked away, the show had started. The two women were on the bed, threshing about as if locked in deadly combat. The act was distinctly lesbian and we described it here in detail.
The blonde tensed as Christina slid a hefty leg between the shapely thighs. A hand cupped one of the fruit-like breasts and a tremor tossed the slender girl's body about the bed. She rose up as the heavier woman began to plaster smacking kisses on her thighs and groin.
Now Christina's mouth fastened on her partner's. Her big hands fondled the heaving bosom and stimulated the soft skin of the squirming thighs. In the silence that followed we heard a groan then a whispered voice and realized it was Christina's. She spoke as she passed her tongue between the huge, swelling mounds, seeking the depth of the valley, lickingup every trace of moisture that was there.
Her hand worked down into a lower area. The blonde encouraged its roaming and opened her thighs. Christina's finger insinuated itself between tangled hairs into the vagina and began some rapid motions that had the blonde twisting lasciviously.
"Ah, ah, ah!" The blonde's slim arms tightened about the other girl's broad back. She worked the lower part of her torso and pushed Christina's head down. She arched up, fusing her loins to the open mouth and daring tongue. Her cry was choking, almost agonized and she became more mobile, more animated. She held fast to the tiny buttocks of Ursula and responded in a way that was raw and uncivilized.
Christina used her mouth and hands to madden the blonde. She feated on the yellow tufted love mound, working to bring on an orgasm. It happened and when the two women parted Christina twisted about on the bed and clapped her hands between her legs. Obviously, she was undergoing orgasms, also.
The blonde rose, gathered her garments and left. Now the young man came forward. He revealed an athelete's body as he stripped. He spoke to the camerman, receiving his instructions then approached the bed. The audience was allowed a profile view of this young man and his masculinity was amazing. He seemed to extend a good dozen inches beyond his body in the full erected state. One buyer rose and shouted something in German. Others repeated this cry and we interpreted this as a close-up. Obviously people who viewed this sort of illicit film wished close looks at the participant. Obediently, the cameraman wheeled in to the bed.
Christina came to life and kneeling on the bed gripped the boy's penis. She ran her fingers up and down it, followed with her tongue, took a portion in the mouth and moved her body in such a manner that the viewers realized thrills were shooting through her. The moment the boy freed himself she doubled up groaning, experiencing another orgasm.
She quaked as her body was arranged, her legs spread and bent. Tension held us all as we watched the boy move between her thighs. We saw him use both hands to steady and guide himself. He went in and Christina yelped like a kicked cur. She arched as she took all of him, every fraction of that weapon into her body. When he was completely submerged she started a series of rapid hip movements. He moved also, drilling into her, creating sensation after sensation. Suddenly she gasped and shouted. And shouted again. The boy increased the pace, bringing her to the peak of ecstasy several times before he reached a climax.
Fellatio and cunnilingus followed and then the actors were given a break. Both wiped themselves down with towels while the cameraman changed film. Christina, picking us out of the audience came over. We noticed again, her bent-knee walk.
"Hello," she said in slightly accented English. "I guess you see what Doctor-told you is a fact."
"Yes, we understand that you derive pleasure as well as money from this."
"It's my job. And it's fun, too. No?"
Her hair was a stringy brown mess and she was gap-toothed. However, she had pretty hazel eyes, a tilted nose and a firm mouth. Our eyes were drawn to her breasts which sagged and were the size of an undeveloped teen-ager's. If she noticed, she didn't mind our looking. We agreed to meet later and then she returned to work.
As the camera moved in the man slapped Christina viciously across the face. She reeled, straightened, dropped to her knees and groped for his penis. She forced his limp prick into her mouth. The boy leaned back trembling and we knew that he was instantly erected. That portion of him that was visible grew. He pulled out, smacked her on the chin and neck with his organ and then took Christina in an abusive way. She was forced to run her tongue up his legs and his buttocks, masturbate him, put the tip of his prick in her ear and allow herself to be buggered.
Analism we understand was quite common in some parts of Europe and Christina and her partner seemed experienced. They both knew what they were doing. He turned her upside down and rammed her from the rear. Again, Christina threshed about in a fit or orgasm.
The final part of the act involved a show with a dog. The animal, a St. Bernard was led in on a leash. A piece of meat was rubbed between Christina's legs and fed to the beast. He devoured it hungrily but when he was persuaded to sniff Christina's crotch the dog showed some reluctance. At last, after much coaxing he slaked his thirst at the core of Christina's being while she wrapped both legs about the canine's neck. Climax was swift in coming and she groaned so wildly that the St. Bernard was frightened off.
The show was ended.
* * *
We were shocked by the state of her small apartment and surprised that she showed not the least embarrassment. Clothes were every where, on the floor, on tables, chairs, the television and hanging from doorknobs. The rug had not been swept in months and evidence of this was there in the form of rusted apple cores, orange peels, old newspapers and long dead flowers.
She explained that she was a lazy girl. This was proven by the sight of the bathroom. It was apparently filthy with several rings around the tub, used tissues and panties on the dirt-streaked floor and a mound of cigarette butts in the toilet bowl. A yank of the chain could have flushed the bowl clean but it was not our job to advise Christina of this. She was quite obviously a disturbed creature.
As she settled herself in a chair we took note of her appearance. Clothed, she was a mess, the sweater cheap, worn and dirty, the skirt wrinkled and thread-bare, the high heeled shoes that were long out of vogue, cracked and in need of repair.
At one point during our conversation she put a Flanco disc on the turn table. Noise blasted out of a speaker and someone from the apartment next door hammered on the wall. Christina ignored this. "They can go to hell. I live as I choose."
"Do you feel satisfied now after the show you put on:
"I received pleasure from it, yes."
"You climaxed often. Doesn't this seem abnormal to you:
"I've seen physicians about it; I've a high sex drive, that's all."
We suggested that it was not the sex drive as much as the lift that orgasm sometimes brings a woman. She could apparently deceive the world about her into thinking she was a happy individual when indeed she was not. Orgasm might be the force sustaining her through the day.
"Are you sure you're journalists and not psychiatrists? Perhaps you've been dealing with too many women like me. You're right, you know. The act buoyed up my spirits. I feel great."
"You dealt with a woman, with a man, and with a dog. Which gave you the most pleasure."
Christina shrugged. "I climaxed with all three but natually, I was happiest with the man." Her eyes lit up. "That man was big, wasn't he? Mein Gott, he has something. You should see some of the boys chosen, out of bars, sometimes university students who need money and so many of them seem to be underdeveloped."
We wondered if it couldn't be the fact that over a period of time she had become so enlargened that only a man of abnormal size could satisfy her.
Again she shrugged. "Perhaps, because after all, I've had all sorts of things shoved up me."
Silence followed for a time and Christina asked if we wished refreshments. We asked for coffee, and still talking, followed her into the kitchen. Like the rest of the flat it was in wretched condition. There might have been twenty-five dirty glasses on the table, cupboard, window sill and in the kitchen sink. The door of the refrigerator was open, an uncapped bottle of milk resting on the floor and scraps of food molding in unwashed plates. We declined the coffee but she didn't take offense.
She laughed. "What's the matter, frightened by all the dirt? Most people who came here are. About once a month I give the place a thorough cleaning." She blew dust out of a glass, fetched a bottle of Steinhager and returned with us to the room. "When I get married I'll have servants, that's the only way."
For a time she poured the colorless drink into the glass. But after a while, perhaps because it took too much effort she began to drink straight from the bottle. This Teutonic drink was similar to Vodka in appearance and taste and we watched it take effect on the unfortunate girl.
"I was a virgin until I was eighteen, you know. My father who was killed on the Russian front had left some money for me. He wanted me to study, and become a doctor. I spent my teens engrossed in school work. My mother had married again, to a man younger than herself, and it was he who financed my education when my inheritance ran out.
"I had a boy friend, Ludwig, who was always pestering me to sleep with him. I finally did and, well it was nothing, and it continued to be nothing. But, it was agreed that we would eventually be married.
"One day, I came home from school and was greeted by my stepfather, Henri. We always kissed each other on the cheeks but this time he pressed his mouth to mine and shoved his tongue inside. I was shocked at first, then frightened. I ran to my room. His feelings for me had changed.
"Later, I told Ludwig about it but he was not interested. Well, the days passed, and one day when I was heading for his house I saw my mother. What is she doing in this district, I wondered. Out of curiosity I followed her and she went straight to Ludwig's house. I was surprised, feeling they were going to talk about me.
"I waited a while then entered the building. I had a key to Ludwig's small apartment and let myself in quietly. There was just one room, and a hall and that's where I stood, listening. There were sounds, like an animal makes and I noticed my mother's garments strewn about the hall. I tip-toed in and saw them, my boy friend and my mother locked together, making love.
"I was too stunned to speak. She was kind of fat, a sort of a slow-moving woman but with Ludwig in her she was as spirited as a child. Her buttocks were moving like a machine and her legs were working up and down his back and around his waist. She came maybe three times while I stood there.
"I screamed at them, and they broke apart. Then I ran out of the house. I ran straight home and told my stepfather. Henri wasn't at all surprised. He said it had been going on for some time. 'Let's pay them back in their own coin', he said. I told him that it would be incest. He corrected me, saying it wouldn't since we were not blood relatives. I was not his real daughter.
"All right, I figured what's good for the mother is better for the daughter. I took off my clothes and let him take me right there in the front room. He was in his late thirties and his body wasn't as good as Ludwig's but he was better accomplished.
"He prepared me by kissing me all over and licking my crotch. He fingered me for several minutes until I was quaking all over and wet, then, he went into me. The second he did I knew this was going to be different, this would be the real thing. I ached all over and when he rose up, in the withdrawing position, I scramed because there was a stinging sensation.
"I was having my first climax, feeling fire burn my breasts and start up from my legs and both flames meeting in my loins. The blaze was terrific and I began to cry because it was so wonderful. And, it went on and on. I reached the point where my mind drifted and my body did all the work.
"Henri came inside of me. I knew because it was quite hot and he slid around a bit inside me but then I had so many orgasms that I closed right around him. He rested a while without withdrawing and then I felt him getting hard again, growing bigger until he filled up my vagina. That set off another blaze and soon I was jerking about and spending.
"My mother came home to prepare dinner and caught us. We fought with her and it turned into the sort of a screaming match that the neighbors heard. When Ludwig came to visit later the fight was still going on. It became worse, the four of us yelling at each other. He said I wasn't a woman, that I was frigid. Henri defended me. He said it took a man to handle a girl like me.
"There was only one thing to do. We all broke up. My stepfather left the house. I severed relations with Ludwig and my mother right then and there, packed, and left, too. I suggested to Henri that we live together but he was worried about reputations. He had a profession and many clients and while a divorce would be bad enough, living openly with a stepdaughter would be disasterous. I said goodbye to him and took to the road. I felt quite grown up.
"We lived in the American zone of Western Germany and I got work on an Army base. I dated soldiers, all kinds, white and colored and went to bed with them. I liked the Negroes best in bed. They were built larger and seemed to live for sex.
"I remember one boy, Wilson P. from Atlanta, Georgia. What he had reminded me of was a fat, black snake. He had a furlough and a little money and a Volkswagon and he took me to Paris. The trip was fatiguing but the moment we registered in a hotel he wanted to make love.
"Wilson said he was to tired to undress so he sat on a chair and told me to mount him. I straddled him, felt him invading me and slid down slowly. I remember looking down and seeing the fur on my sex blend with his coarse hairs. He was so powerful that I had to bite down hard on my lower lip. Then I rotated my hips. I soon started to come and my buttocks trembled as I went up and down.
"It was a wild climax and I wanted to stop I was so weak. I fell backwards to the floor and Wilson cursed and thrust himslef into the wet cleft of my sex. He beat at me like a hammer so that he was sweating. I was whimpering but coming all the time.
"Later, that same night he made me go down on him. I didn't want to at first but he promised to eat me. All right, I told you, you first. He did and I creamed like an insane person. Afterwards, I had to pay him back. I didn't resist when he gripped my head and forced it against his thighs. Naturally, I was unable to take all of him into my mouth but I did the best I could. He received pleasure and while he was going off I climaxed, too.
"Wilson had to return to the Army camp in Germany but I loved Paris so that I parted from him. My first day alone I picked up a student on the Left Bank and went with him to his room. This boy was only twenty and small, I think I was a little taller. His name was Alain S. and he claimed to know everything, having spent time in North Africa. He would teach me what he knew.
"Alain liked to have me lie sideways, facing him. We'd kiss and then he would turn sinuously and make contact, have his sex in mine and be shoving in deeper as I rolled over and he lay atop me. For a small boy he had overpowering strength, the equivalent of Wilson's and every part of me opened as my passion rose to the heights. He also knew control and I would gush like a river while he kept on and on. Our bodies would be slippery and still he would ride me.
"Well, we were lovers for a long time but we starved. He had a few francs and I had nothing. He suggested that we do an act for blue films. He knew people making them and said we could earn eating money.
"The first time I made love with Alain before the camera I tightened up. I just couldn't get on with it. I lay like a log even though he tried everything. Finally, the producer of the film became angry and called in a North African from a run-down cafe next door. This man, an Arab took me on dog fashion. With my face away from the camera I climaxed.
"I soon became a star of blue films. I slept with everybody. While the men, and some of the other girls behaved in a business-like way I derived pleasure from it. Soon, when I had enough money put by I went off on a trip with one of the girls from the act. This girl, Marie-Claire was a stunning brunette. Her body was beautiful. Naturally, we became lovers.
"Whenever we ran short of money we'd pick up men and go to bed with them. Sometimes we slept four in a bed, switching partners and sleeping with each other, too. I enjoyed it tremendously. However, a lot of time had passed and I was tired of wandering. I thought it was time to return to Germany.
"I hitch-hiked my way back, sleeping with men almost every kilometre of the way. Some were sadists, they beat me. One man applied heat to my body, then ice, proving that he could make me come. Strangely enough I did. Another was a candle-stick salesman, and he shoved fat candles up me.
"Anyway, when I reached Germany I found myself friendless and alone. No one wanted any part of me. My stepfather had remarried, my boyfriend had left the city and my mother was living like a recluse. She allowed me to stay with her for a short time but we never spoke. I became nervous and to relieve my anxiety I used to lock myself in the bathroom and masturbate. Sometimes I used my fingers, but most of the time I aided my climax with a banana.
"One day someone called out my name on the street. I found myself facing the producer of the blue films from Paris. We chatted and he told about the world market for these pictures. He saw that I was down and out and said he would employ me.
"I went over big because I was a professional performer. The makers of these films find it difficult to get people to remain long. Mostly they find boys and girls who are in the red and will perform just a few times. I talked with these people and they couldn't understand how I could stick at it so long.
"I developed pangs of conscience and went to see a psychiatrist. His diagnosis was that I was insatiable, climax happy. He didn't condemn me but he said we had to try and effect a cure. I couldn't afford to keep up the treatments but he offered to handle me free. That was good but what about food, my rent, things like that. I needed money.
"Here in Germany the only men who can afford to keep a girl are middle-aged men. They are the ones with money, those fat bastards you see with expensive cigars and Mercedes Benz automobiles. It wasn't difficult for me to get one but they are worthless in bed. At least worthless for me. They want sex only once a night.
"I had to go back to making blue films. At least they enabled me to secure many orgasms. I need that."
"What about getting yourself a young lover?"
"They haven't any money. And they're human. How many young boys can go six or seven times a day. Perhaps the first week and then they're dead."
"Will you return for treatments?"
"There's no sense."
* * *
We pitied Christina B. The girl was doomed, she knew it and we knew it. There was no out for an insatiable creature like that. Eventually, she would turn to prostitution. When her looks and youth vanished she would face a dead end. A breakdown was inevitable, and then, an asylum.