Father-daughter incest is a form of highly tabooed sexual behavior which, according to experts, come from basically stable pattern. Researchers have discovered that environments where the father is a strong figure, and the home situation of an unstable nature, adds to the odds that sexual intimacies between father and daughter will occur.
The moral taboos against this act, so strongly activated in civilized societies, lead the researchers to the conclusion that the man who does commit the act with his daughter possesses a definite weakness of the mind. Normally, this weakness may be the result of excessive drinking. But in some cases, it is, according to the experts, the result of brain damage or mind-affecting diseases.
The onus of blame and guilt is always placed upon the father in cases of incest. It is up to him, being mature and having been exposed to the taboos against incest, to restrain himself, when this moral armor disappears, it is only him who remains to be blamed for the act.
But in many primitive tribes, there are no such taboos against father-daughter incest. When the girls reach the age of puberty, these cultures practice massive orgies in which the fathers openly perform in sexual intimacies with their daughters. The taboos within these cultures do not exist because their actions are relegated on the assumptions and premises of physical capabilities rather than moral, esthetic considerations.
The warnings lodged by moralists and social thinkers against father-daughter incest revolve mainly around the potential of psychic harm to the daugher. They maintain that because of invasion by her father, she will be traumatized in her future relationships with members of the opposite sex. Psychiatrists do believe the trauma to be a serious one, and do support this sexual taboo.
In this study of father-daughter incest, I have tried to compile case histories which have occurred recently in our society. In most of these examples, the old formulas were consistent and did affect the actions of the people involved. Loss of self-respect, liquor and the presence of the girl in an environment with her father did add to the fact that incest did occur. But also, we must add to these basic patterns the conditions which exist today and did not when the initial observations were made.
Society today is lowering the age of sexual maturation. The young of today are more healthy, more aware and more determined to experience life at an earlier age than any generation that has ever grown up in the United States. This element, combined with the older patterns of incest, does appear as a new pattern emerging in these cases.
It is hoped that a reading of these case histories will provide the reader with a more thorough understanding of father-daughter incest as it exists in the seventh decade of the twentieth century.
CHAPTER ONE
Sheri L. is a tall, sultry girl in her early twenties. Bright and exciting, she epitomizes the free-thinking and free-wheeling woman of the '70's.
Born and raised in Los Angeles, Sheri has led a life that would have most likely driven lesser personalities into an institution. But her strength lies in her ability to understand, and accept, human nature.
During our interview, which lasted for twenty-four hours, Sheri expressed herself openly and with animation. Using her finely sculptured body, with flaring breasts and long, sensuous legs, she became a total entity within herself. Every word and thought was accompanied by movement and mime, adding almost a dramatic reconstruction of the events of her life.
Sheri's experiences with her own father, and how that situation came to pass, are revealed by her in this interview. She has left nothing out, and sometimes the verve with which she describes her experiences even startled me.
As a leadoff case in our study of incest between fathers and daughters, I think Sheri's case to be of exceptional value because of her personality and because of the honesty and insight with which she describes her own sexual experiences.
L.A. has always been my home. I have never lived anywhere else, and really don't plan to. I guess it's somewhat typical that what happened to me happened in Los Angeles. I don't mean that this city promotes this kind of behavior, but that in L.A. there seems to be a greater chance of these kinds of things happening.
Look at it this way. We, my mother and father and myself, lived in a ranch style home out in the valley. There was a swimming pool out in the backyard and plenty of grass and trees. The setting was natural and open. It was natural that when I reached a certain age, like fifteen, I would start experiencing my own body. This is exactly what happened and it is what led eventually to my relationship with my father.
My parents traveled a lot. Both of them were in businesses which took them out of town. When I became fifteen, they finally decided that I was old enough to be left alone. That was during the summer when they decided that, and it was during that same summer that I really began finding out what sex was all about.
The first day after they had left, I took off all my clothes and began running around in the backyard in the nude. My breasts were pretty good, and my body was strong and kind of lean. I really enjoyed the feeling of the air against my nipples and the warmth that developed between my thighs. I felt sensual and alive, and daring enough to be standing naked out in the broad daylight.
Until that time, I hadn't really played with myself very much. My body was just kind of there, and it didn't matter too much to me what I did with it. But that summer changed all that and I began to notice how I worked sexually.
I dove into the pool and let the water run all over me, up between my legs and everything. I threw my hand between my thighs and brought it up to my fur. The lips there felt strange, soft and even and with the warmth of the water. I put my finger between them and pushed it up inside my vagina. The feeling was so overwhelming that I thought I would faint.
Then, I pulled myself over to the edge of the pool where the coping ran. I threw my leg up onto the side and began rubbing my cunt along the hard cement. I guess at the time I was stimulating my clit, and chills and spasms shot through my body like crazy. It was all really too much, laying there on the side of the pool masturbating like that. I felt myself to be pretty fucking daring, and that added to the excitement.
After I was finished, I lay down on the grass, still naked, and just let the warm sun drift lazily over my skin. I spread my legs and felt that warmth creep up between them, warming the fine little hairs of cunt and making them prickle.
At that time, I had noticed that next door to us there was a boy about my age. He was tall, blonde and very good-looking. He never spoke to me, and seemed to be withdrawn into himself so I never got to know him.
It wasn't until much later that I realized that he has actually been watching me cavort in the nude, himself jacking off during the whole show!
Actually, I was the first one to get caught at our strange little game of voyeurism. One day, when I was naked and going through my little ritual out in the yard, I caught a look through the fence of somebody on the other side.
There was a little gap in the wood where I could look through and see into the other yard. I positioned myself up against the fence and peered through, my heart beating faster and faster at what I saw.
Laying on the grass, stark naked and with a huge hard-on, was David, the blonde guy. His legs were pointing towards me and were spread widely. I could see his balls hanging down between with the huge, pink rod rising like the Washington Monument towards the sky. I felt my cunt begin to moisten at the sight, and pushed my pelvis firmly up against the wall.
David began playing with himself. He took his prick into his hand and began jerking himself off, slowly at first but increasing his speed with each passing second. The harder he pushed, the warmer my cunt got.
Finally, I threw my legs apart and pushed my fingers up inside me. I tried to match my own movements with his, shoving my fingers up inside each time he threw his own pelvis skyward. v
When his white juices shot into the air, I felt myself begin to throb and pulsate. I kept after it until he had finished.
That's when he saw me. For some reason, he sat up and looked towards the fence. His eyes widened, he jumped to his feet and ran towards me, his prick bouncing up and down and waving in the wind.
I was frozen behind the wall, unable to run but fearful of staying. My hand was still up inside my cunt, and my thighs were clenched so tightly around it that it was aching from the pressure.
"You enjoy the show?" he asked, peering through the slit in the fence.
I couldn't speak, but tried to smile to show him that I was really in control.
"I do it everyday about this time. So, tomorrow, you can tune in again and get your rocks off, okay?"
Then, he did something which began the momentum of our relationship. He took his cock, still hardened, and shoved it through the hole in the fence. I tried to back away as I saw the pink, hot tip coming closer, but couldn't.
"You should be tired of watching, Sheri." He said, as the heated skin touched my belly, just above the line where my cunt hair ended.
"Yyyess..." I muttered, feeling a shot of electricity through my body as his skin touched mine.
We stood like that for a few seconds, then
I began moving my belly up and down against his prick. I looked closely at the throbbing head, and bulbous tip, then reached down and touched it.
"That's better, now you'll get some of the real thing!"
His skin was like hot rubber, and each time I moved my shaking fingers around the head, it seemed to shake a little.
"Put your mouth to it, Sheri, and blow me.
I was insulted at his words, but the thought really appealed to me. I leaned down and faced the prick head on. I blew warm air onto it, then stabbed at the hole with my tongue.
"That's it, baby, now you're getting to it!"
I ran my tongue around the head, and then put my lips to it. It tasted salty and kind of fleshy, but it wasn't a bad kind of taste. Finally, I encircled it all and took the whole tip into my mouth. Up and down I ran along the shaft, working my tongue feverishly against the skin as I went.
David couldn't move because he would have gotten splinters on his dick. He just had to stand there while I sucked him off. When he finally came, I backed off, not wanting to take his come into my mouth.
The prick just shuddered and spurted through the fence, his seed spilling onto the grass in the backyard which I had helped my father plant three years ago.
After it was over, David pulled himself from the fence and looked through the hole. He examined my naked body, his eyes moving sporadically around behind the fence.
"Spread your legs and let me see you there!"
I moved in closer, then spread my legs and pulled my lips apart. He had a clear shot of my warm, pink skin and the juices which seemed to flow from there with remarkable consistency.
"Very nice. You want to fuck?"
Suddenly, I didn't want him anymore. There was something inside me which drove me away from meeting him anywhere except through this fence. I guess maybe it was his abruptness, but whatever the reason, I didn't want him.
"No, David," I replied, closing my thighs and pulling away from the fence, "I don't want to fuck you!"
"Cunt!! ! " He screamed, loud enough for the neighbors to hear.
But I left him, not wanting to cause a scene or let him talk me into something I didn't want. The whole thing was too impersonal for my blood. The desire to have a man's penis between my legs was certainly there, but there was also the need for something more. For some reason, the fact that he had been masturbating out there, just like myself, turned me off to him and made me think of him in a bad way. I mean, if he couldn't do anything better as a man than just lay out there in the sunshine, then he wasn't much of a man!
Whatever the reasons, I decided not to go out into the backyard any more, but stay inside the house and do something constructive with myself.
The next day my father returned from his business trip. He looked tan and well, and told me that everything had gone quite well. I asked him about Mom, but he kind of shrugged his shoulders and dropped the conversation. It was then that the thought occurred to me that she was having an affair of some kind and because of that, Dad was very hurt.
I tried to take over the household and make things as pleasant as possible. I cooked the meals, provided him with small talk and tried looking my best. He didn't really pay attention to me like I wanted him to, but I kept at it. I realize now that I was trying desperately to take the place of my mother ... become her and play the role she used to play with him. That sounds kind of sick now, but then it made a lot of sense.
The sexual thing with him really did not begin to bloom until after he had been home for about a week. After the scene in the backyard with David, I had grown really interested in men. I mean, everywhere I went, I would size up the men I saw and try to imagine what hung between their legs. I had heard of women in middle-age going prick crazy, and I guess that was happening to me. I dreamed of penises, in all shapes and sizes, and desperately wanted the feel of one between my legs ... I guess something to bring me down to Earth with that same feeling I had had with David.
Then one night, I gathered enough nerve to begin something. I heard him taking a bath upstairs and decided to go inside the bathroom. I crept up the stairs, shaking with anticipation and worrying like crazy about what he would do when he saw me. But there was something inside me pushing me on, something which drove all the fears and doubts from inside me and made me want to seek him out.
I opened the bathroom door carefully, trying not to make a sound. The room was filled with steam, and I could see his hulky outline behind the shower curtain. Dad was a big man, tall and heavy, who had gone kind of soft with middle-age. But there was still something of the animal in him. The way he walked, with his shoulders hunched over and his head jutting forward gave me the feeling that he was stalking his next victim. He excited me in a strange way, also, knowing that he had been with many women. In my strangest moments I felt what better way to begin my sex life with a man who I knew loved me and also had all that experience.
I stood in the center of the bathroom for what seemed like hours-unable to reveal my presence yet unable to run away. Finally, I called out to him.
"Would you like your back washed?"
"Sheri!! ! " he yelled, peering around the edge of the shower curtain. "What in hell are you doing here?"
I tried to recover myself, but was too hurt to do anything. "Goddamn you" I shouted, "Go to hell!! ! "
And I turned and ran from the room, crying and upset because he had rejected me. I threw myself down upon my bed and tried to go to sleep, or at least get away from everything as much as possible.
In the blackness of the room, I smelled the moist odor of his body next to me. I could feel the warmth of his bath pouring out all over me, then his hand was on the back of my neck, rubbing that place gently.
"I'm sorry I yelled, it was just kind of shocking, that's all."
I rolled over and looked up at him. He was naked except for the towel, and I could see the bulge beneath the cloth where his penis was.
"It's all right, Dad, I just wanted to make you feel better. I know how Mom must have hurt you."
"That's all over now. It's just you and me from now on and we've got to make it the best way we can ... O.K.? "
I smiled and began playing with the small hairs near his navel, right where the top of his towel rested. I wanted so badly to see his sex, to hold his stiff prick that had once driven hard and hot inside my mother and dumped the white semen that had eventually produced me. But if my action was too abrupt, then I'm sure I would have driven him away. After all, he was my father, even though both my parents were gone so much of the time that neither one of them felt much like even a relative.
"Now you go to sleep. Tomorrow, I'll take you to the beach."
He left the room, holding that dumb towel around his waist and never letting go. But at least the next day we would spend at the beach together and that was enough for right then.
The day was hot and windy. Dad and I drove down through Malibu and found a nice secluded beach at the foot of a small cliff. We were in a happy mood, and the day seemed right for everything that might happen.
I was wearing my bikini and felt really sexy in it. My body was slim and firm, and it felt good to feel my tits bouncing around beneath the thin strap of the bra. I noticed more than once my father's eyes planted on my chest, looking at me as though I were a real woman instead of a little girl. That really made me happy, and added much to my daring mood that day.
The beach was empty, and we took a spot near the end where a huge rock jutted out into the ocean. Dad lay down on the blanket and stretched himself towards the sun. I looked at him for a while, and began to see him more and more as just a man instead of my father. This kind of weird viewpoint had become a normal thing with me, and after a while, I got used to the idea. At first, the thought of him as a man, singular and unattached, revolted and scared me, but as time went on, I grew to like the idea. There was something exciting and daring about it, something in it that released me from a plaguing feeling I had always had. I guess you could call it growing up or something. Whatever it was, though, I really enjoyed it.
"Would you put some lotion on me?"
My father smiled and looked pleased that I had asked him to do this.
I rolled over on my stomach and reached up behind me and unsnapped my bra. I felt a chill shoot through me as my breasts fell free from the garment, and I tried lifting myself just a little on my elbows so that maybe he would be able to see my nipples.
He began rubbing my back, pulling his strong hands along my spine and working the cream down into my pores. He reached the top of my ass and kind of played with the skin there, kneading and warming it under the powerful force of his hands.
"You're going to be something else, baby, a real looker!"
"You're not bad yourself ... for an old man."
That broke him up. He slapped me on the ass, but left his hand there a second too long, kind of pushing down into the soft flesh of my cheek. I felt like I would burst apart, but then he took his hand away and worked some more on my back.
I knew as he worked his way up and down my back that he was getting turned on. I think the fact that we were at the beach and everything took away the definition he had of me as his daughter. He was looking at me as though I were a woman, and that made me feel good.
"You've got nice hands, daddy, like you really know what you're doing."
He chuckled a little and told me that he had 'been around.'
Then I decided to do something real daring. I rolled over on my back, exposing my tits to his eyes and smiling up at him.
"You like me?" I asked, arching my back just a little so that the breasts would seem larger than they actually were.
"I've always liked you, Sheri, you know that."
I didn't know how to take that answer. Was he putting me on? Or was he serious but still talking as my father. The fact that I was showing him my breasts, out there on that beach though, made everything he said take on a different light.
"You're very nice, there, sweetie, very nice."
"Touch them ... please..."
I took his hand, still creamy and white, and placed it on my nipple. He took the bud, watching it grow as he kneaded it between his forefinger and thumb.
"You're becoming a real woman, yes sir, a real woman."
I pulled his head down onto me. Just before his lips reached my nipple, he threw a strange look. It was like he was asking me if this was really what I wanted. I nodded my head and pulled him closer. We were no longer looking at each other through the masks of a family, but as a man looks at a woman. Everything that had come before this was being washed away, thrown back into time where it didn't belong to either of us. The only thing that belonged now was this moment.
And the moment was becoming better and better. He drove with his tongue around the edge of the nipple, then stabbed at the tip. I felt electric charges through every nerve ending, and wanted desperately for him to bite me there. I ached terribly, and pulled his head forcefully even tighter against my tit.
"Suck me, daddy, suck me hard!"
He was really working on me when he started slowly moving his hand downwards. He crossed my stomach, then reached the elastic tops of my bikini panties.
"Oh God," I moaned, waiting on the edge of the abyss, "please go down there ... please, daddy!"
His hand went underneath the panties. I could feel the warmth of his fingers as he played with the top edge of my fur. His fingers were gentle, and well-practiced. He knew exactly where he was going, and seemed in no rush to get there.
"Finger me ... put your finger inside me!" I threw my legs apart, pushing my knee into his groin. I could feel his strength there, hard and pulsating beneath his swimming trunks. It felt good, and I knew he was strong. There was something really secure in the fact that he had what he had there, and I kneaded his balls and prick with my knee.
Underneath my panties, he traced the line of my crack down through the jungle of my cunt. He was an explorer on a continent he knew well from the outside. Now, after fifteen years of raising and caring for me, he was finally allowed into the secrets of my darkness. It made me feel good to think that he had actually wanted this all his life, and that if it hadn't been for my boldness, he would have never achieved it.
My juices were really flowing as he placed his finger on the outer edge of my vagina. Then he found my clit and began toying with it. It was driving me crazy, and I was pumping up and down into the air of the beach. Then his finger went deep inside me. I was beginning to feel full down there but knew I would never feel all the way until finally his huge, throbbing prick was inside me. That was where I finally wanted him, plunging deep inside and with all the force he had within himself.
"Oh God" I moaned, now losing control of where I was and any sense of modesty, "take off my panties ... please, take them off!! ! "
I raised my hips and he slid the small panties down my legs and threw them onto the sand. I was naked, writhing and aroused beneath the warm flesh of my own father. There was almost too much happening at one time to really take everything in, but the thoughts bit at my mind, developing then fading quickly only to return again and haunt me.
His mouth began traveling downwards. I threw my legs even wider apart, and arched my pelvis up towards him. He looked down between my thighs, and spread my lips there.
"Beautiful ... you're gorgeous there, honey."
"Eat it, daddy, suck me ... there ... hurry..
He leaned down between my legs and blew a hot stream of air into my crack. I took in his gift and rolled with it, feeling my lips teasing with the air around them and throbbing like crazy.
As he drew closer and closer, I could feel the warmth of his lips. Finally, he kissed my clit, then my vagina where he drove his tongue inside me and began playing his tune.
"Ooooh ... your prick, give me your prick!! ! " I was going crazy. Naked and writhing, I was screaming into the warm daylight, unaware of everything but his mouth at my cunt and the looming presence of his meat.
He threw his butt around and his groin was now facing me. I tore at his trunks and finally managed to pull them halfway down. His prick popped out of its confinement and faced me.
It was a beautiful prick, long, thick and shiny. All the years of use and it still looked like it could have been on a boy half my father's age. I took the length of it into the palm of my hand and began pulling at it. His pelvis began moving just slightly with each tug, and I wondered just how long he would be able to last.
My mouth opened like in a dream as I took him inside. He was huge, and there wasn't much I could with all of him. I just had to take whatever I could between my lips and blow him that way.
Meanwhile, he was working like crazy on my clit, and virtually driving me up a wall. I felt like I was on the verge, and ready to come.
"Fuckme ... hurry, daddy, fuck me!! ! "
He withdrew his mouth and pulled his cock from between my lips. As I waited for him to turn around, I realized I was on the threshold of having that huge, vibrant piece of meat between my legs. The thought made me cream even more and I, tore at his shoulders, hoping to make him move faster.
Finally, he loomed above me. He smiled down, showing his even, white teeth. I kissed him gently on the lips and pushed my tongue into his mouth. We held there while he slowly pushed his cock into my throbbing cunt.
"Ahhhh ... God, it feels good..."
Inch by inch, he pushed his way inside. I began to feel totally filled by him, on the verge of complete satiation. It was the most incredible feeling I had ever had, like that he was taking all of me and pulling it into himself. Our bodies were meshing, playing with each other, and leaving he and myself behind to gaze at one another and to experience it all.
He began slowly, moving rhythmically and with ease up and down the length of my vagina. I held tightly onto his large shoulders, almost afraid to move myself because he was so large. Also, I could feel the trouble he was having keeping himself under control. I felt good that I had turned him on so much that he couldn't control it.
"Daddy," I cried, thrusting my hips upwards for another inch of him, "come. Come if you want to. It's all right ... there will be other times ... "
"Thank you, sweetie..." And he came. Shot like a fire hose that has just had all the pressure released he came into my, his daughter's, cunt. I held him tightly, now feeling for the first time his own weakness and his vulnerability. This man, my father, was just a man. Strong and weak, he was now sinking everything he had into me. I could see why he had been popular with women. He gave everything he had when he fucked, and really made you feel wanted. He was a good man, and at that moment, I never wanted to leave him.
After that day at the beach, my father and
I made our own little household. I became, virtually, the wife of the home and maintained my duties. It was a wonderful two months. During that time, he taught me everything he knew about sex and I gave him everything I had. We got along well, and there seemed to be nothing that would ever take us apart.
But we were living in a dream world where none of the reality of our existence ever entered. There was no one or nothing that could remind us of what we were doing. To us, it was a new world, a world which didn't have the sexual taboos of incest. As far as we were concerned, whenever we made love and had sex, the laws which applied to other people simply didn't exist.
Then mother came home. Father had told me that she was living with another man up North, and he felt sure that she would never return. I was happy about this, feeling like he was my man now, and anybody who desired to take him away from me would have to fight for him. I was at once jealous and worried when we heard that she was returning.
We were laying around in bed on a Sunday morning. Naked and sleepy, we had had some coffee, watched a little football on the television, and were feeling very good. Then, the phone had rung. It had been Mom. She told my father that she was only two hours from home and would be there that morning.
"Are you going to let her come back?" I asked, feeling as though my entire world was crashing around me.
"I don't know, sweetie," he replied, looking away from me outside the window.
"Well, maybe this will help you make up your mind."
I took his penis into my hand and began rubbing it. But nothing happened. He was still looking absently out the window. I drew myself down between his legs and licked the inside of his thighs. As I worked up between them, licking his balls and the space between them, I realized that this was the end. When I took his cock into my mouth, stabbing at the hole with my tongue but still getting no response, I was sure that everything we had had together was ending just like that. One phone call, one word from a woman who had cheated on him and hurt his pride, and reality stormed back into our little world.
"It's over isn't it?" I asked, pulling my lips away from his soft penis, feeling like running away before he could answer me. But his lack of response, that faraway look in his eye was all I needed. I got up from the bed, looked down upon the naked body of my father, and walked from the room.
As I left the house, I saw my mother driving up in her car. She looked eager, and kind of kept. There was an air about her which told of plans and schemes. I knew she would scheme with him, and that he would take that scheming because she was the woman he loved. I never returned to that house again. I knew that there could never be any kind of normal family relationship between us. I was the one who had to leave, the one who had to sacrifice my home because of that.
As it turned out, I'm not bitter about it. I know that naturally, the situation could not have come to any more than it did. I don't resent what I did, but sometimes the confusion over it is remarkable. I guess that's how these things work on you.
SUMMARY
Sheri L. found herself in what be classified as a 'normal' emotional situation where cases of incest have been recorded. The situation, with the fact the mother was absent and the girl was there, led to the involvement between Sheri and her father. It was a need fulfilled by both of them, and that need disappeared when the mother finally returned.
In Sheri's perspective, her father represented a strong and manly figure. Her complaint against David, the fact that he just lay around all day sunning himself, indicates that she had strong feelings about the roles which men should play. Her father, with his success in business and his worldly ways, provided her with this image. Her troubles in the future may rest in the fact that not all men are built like her father. What Sheri needs to do now is to drop the image from her mind, reflect only upon the experience and go from there with a clean bill of slate. It has often been said by experts that incestual relationships harm the child because of this very fact that they become so attached to the incestual parent that they can never achieve a satisfactory relationship outside the family. In Sheri's case, the potential for this situation to haunt her is quite high.
The father in this case was a man who allowed himself to replace the image of his wife by that of his daughter. It is quite possible that at first he was enamoured by the nudity and sexual nature of his 'little girl,' But as time went on, it became clear that she represented to him only a replacement for the missing wife. This theory is confirmed by the fact that when the wife did call, the father was unable to achieve any sexual response to his daughter's moves.
Father-daughter incest is a very strong emotional occurrence. As evidenced by this case, it can have long-lasting effects on both parties and create trauma in later life. Hopefully, both Sheri and her father will be able to work out the relationship they had and find new ways in which to respond to others in the future.
CHAPTER TWO
Harry A. is a middle-aged working man who has spent the better part of his life raising his daughter and supporting his wife. Basically, he is not the kind of man who would be called colorful or radical. He has abided by the laws of the land, contributed his fair share in taxes and lived mainly as a decent citizen.
But all this came to a halt with Harry when his wife left him and he lost his job to automation. Living in a small factory town near the Mojave desert, Harry began to stay at home because there was no place for him to look for work. As a participant in his own community, Harry suddenly found himself unable to contribute anything.
I interviewed Harry using a tape recorder and plenty of time. His manner was easy and cordial, though at times he seemed vague and unsure of himself. Nevertheless, he revealed to me, and now to you, his story in great detail and some amount of relish. It is a story that experts would explain to be 'typical' in cases of incest. But for Harry, the events which lead to our interview were anything but that, and the changes in his life were revolutionary for him.
First it was June who left me. I remember it was a cold windy night-the kind you can get only on the deserts. The house was rattling and shaking and I thought to myself that I was a lucky man to have a wife and daughter to keep me warm. I always used to think this way whenever the weather got too bad, kind of explaining to myself I guess for the lousy job I had at the factory.
Anyway, I was driving through the neighborhood when I turned the corner and saw our other car gone from the garage. I didn't know what to think, especially since I knew Carol, our daughter, and her friends were going to have one of those slumber parties that night and June would never leave a bunch of fourteen year old girls alone, under any conditions.
But then I found her letter. It said that she had found another man and was going to Los Angeles. She claimed that life out on the desert had been turning her into a rat and everything and that she couldn't stand it any more. I sat down real quick like on the chair in the kitchen, trying to adjust to what was happening. But that was difficult.
Then Carol and her three friends came inside. They were all blonde little girls, but for some reason, I guess because my own wife wasn't there, they kind of appealed to me. They all had bodies, and one of them had boobs that were bigger than June's. Being the only man in the house on this strange night gave me some really weird ideas. I guess the way I looked at those chicks, even my daughters, gave them the same feelings. There was kind of a strange silence all around when Carol introduced me to her friends.
"Where's mom?"
I told Carol that her mother had to go see her grandmother. She accepted that pretty easily and went giggling back into the living room and then into her own bedroom where they were going to sleep.
This one girl, I think her name was Sally, really stayed with me as I began to hit that old whiskey. She was tall, stacked like crazy and with a body that belonged on a woman twice her age. Her eyes were what did it, though, because while Carol had been making those introductions, this little chick kept flashing these sultry brown eyes at me-like she knew everything in the world about fucking, or at least desired an education along those lines. Anyway, with each new taste of the alcohol her face seemed to loom up in front of me. I felt daring and kind of really rotten, not caring what I thought or eventually even what I did.
I listened while sitting there at the kitchen table to the winds die down, and then to girls after they finally stopped joking around and fell asleep. I was trying to figure out what to do with my life, where to go and if I should try and find my wife. But the whiskey was working its spell on me, and my thoughts weren't too clear. Then, out of nowhere, appeared this girl Sally.
"Up kind of late aren't you?"
She nodded. But she didn't look sleepy at all. She was wearing this nightgown which was almost transparent. I could see the lift of her breasts, and the pink darkness of her nipples peering through. Down below, the small triangle of black hair was also visible. I felt myself beginning to rise from the dead underneath the table.
"I can never sleep," she said, resting her hand on her hips and kind of throwing out her little cunt towards me, "because I have this problem."
I tried to sound nasty because I wanted her out. I mean, she was really getting to me and the whiskey and everything didn't help.
"What kind of problem is it?" I asked, watching her large and young tits move strongly beneath her gown.
She smiled and ran her tongue along her lips, making them shiny and inviting. "I don't know, it feels like a fever I always get ... like something inside me needs to be filled."
I didn't know what to think. I mean, was it possible that this little fourteen year old was making a play or something? The idea was definitely appealing, but still immoral as hell.
"Would you like a cup of hot chocolate?" I asked, trying to sound like the old man I was.
"That's not quite what I had in mind. I thought maybe a little human comfort might help."
She walked around the table, her breasts bobbing beneath her gown, and swung her ass onto my lap. Immediately I was as hard as a rock beneath her. The bulge in my pants fit nicely between the smooth, strong cheeks of her tight little ass.
"You seem to be having troubles, too."
She said, wriggling herself so that the obvious hulk which was throbbing beneath her could get better situated in her ass.
I muttered and stuttered, but couldn't say anything that might have sounded reasonable. Her breasts were hanging right there in front of my eyes, and through the material I could see that they were strong and large. Then she turned to face me, and with that motion her breasts swung around and were right there at my mouth.
"You're a nice man, Harry, I mean, I've always liked you."
This little chick was really getting it on, and I debated with myself whether or not to let it go any further. But she was so pretty and inviting sitting there I really never had a choice.
"Wouldn't you like to touch me?"
Instead of waiting for my answer, she pushed herself up against my face, burying her tit into my mouth. Through the material of her nightie, I sucked on her nipples, making it grow tight and hard.
"Ahhhh . ... " she moaned, throwing her head backwards, "you do it so well. You must have really been around..."
Then she lifted herself off my lap, and drew her nightie over her head. Naked and shining like a newborn child beneath the kitchen light, Sally posed for me. Her body was incredible. Her legs were lean and strong, and her hair at her cunt was fine and thin so that I could see the crack that rode up between her legs. She spread them a little to give me a better look and smiled.
"You like me there?" she asked, spreading herself now with her hands.
I looked deeply into the pink, juicy folds and could not deny that it was probably the finest little cunt I had ever seen. I mean, it was clean and open, tight and juicy and she was beautiful everywhere else, too. I decided that she was the best looking piece of ass I had ever seen. Suddenly, I didn't miss my wife anymore, and, if someone had asked me who she was, I wouldn't have been able to remember her name.
"Let me see you, Harry, I want to see what a real man looks like."
I felt kind of embarrassed when I stood up and began undoing my trousers. But her eyes were really eager, and she was almost absent-mindedly rubbing her little fir pie and it turned me on so much that by the time I had my underwear over my cock, I was as hard as I had ever been.
"It's beautiful! I mean, it's the best looking one I've ever seen!" She was really happy, and walked over to me. Her hand was shaking slightly as she took my meat and held it up so she could examine it.
Then she knelt down onto the floor and put her mouth to it. Her lips were sweet and young, and as she drew in all of me, I could feel her tongue working without sureness around the length. Then she really began sucking me off, moving back and forth like crazy, drawing me in tight then moving back again without ever taking a breath. I held her head firmly against me and rode with her mouth.
"I want it inside me ... please, Harry, put it inside!"
She threw herself backwards onto the cold kitchen floor. Her legs were spread and I leaned down between them and took a taste of her sweet cunt. It was soft and warm, and the skin around her hole was strong and well-formed. There wasn't the droop like you find on older women, but a perfectly formed little cunt surrounded by incredibly perfect skin.
"Oh God," she cried, wrapping her thighs around my head, "please, your cock, put your cock inside!"
I pulled back and drew myself between her legs. She opened them as widely as possible and watched me with eyes that reminded me of a small deer.
"I'm not a virgin, baby, but go easy anyway." She breathed a slight smile across her face.
As the tip of my prick entered her, I thought how this chick was going to be a real winner. I mean, she really had the taste for fucking. I could imagine her in five more years, knowing everything there was to know about fucking and really making some dude happy. Ah, I thought to myself, this generation was really a bunch of lucky bastards!
But she was tight, even though she wanted to make believe that she was a continual goer. My cock would make it in about a half inch, then I would have to pull back again and go through the same process. She was warm, and the skin of her vagina clenched around me like a vice. After June's used and wide hole, where you felt like you were diving into hell itself, this warm, tight little snatch was the greatest.
"Easy, baby, easy," she moaned, pulling me from my ass into herself. Finally, I opened her up enough and began pumping very easily and directly into her. No imagine stuff, just a straight and driving jackhammer. I always found that that was what the chicks liked best that simple, powerful thrust forward with all of you behind it.
We plunged into each other, trying to make it last but the excitement was so great that that was difficult. Finally, I came. As I shot my stuff into her, it felt like my whole inside, then my entire body, was being sucked out of me. She let out little yelps and cries-like a wounded animal, but held on to take everything I had. Finally, I collapsed on top of her.
"Did you have any protection?" I asked, suddenly seeing the possibilities.
"Of course" she smiled, pulling her thighs together tightly around my prick.
It was at that moment that I thought I saw the pink color of my daughter's nightgown disappear around the doorway and into the hallway. I wondered then if she had seen it all.
For the next few weeks, Carol acted very strangely towards me. There was no indication on her part that she had seen Sally and myself fucking that night; but, on the other hand, there was this strange way in which she always looked at me. It was like she was trying to size me up-figure out if I was something to be reckoned with or not. Obviously, I felt, she and Sally had never discussed that evening between themselves because that would have been hitting too close to home.
I started changing after that evening with Carol's friend. I began to notice my own daughter in light of a possible lay, regarding her small, pointed tits and her lean, long legs that still didn't quite fit with the rest of her. After all, she was the only woman in the house now that my wife had left, and the sexual needs within me just didn't walk out with my wife. As a matter-of-fact, I was getting hornier and hornier as time went on, feeling the urge to get next to some warm flesh and sink myself deeply into some warm and juicy cunt. But there was no one around who could supply me with that valuable commodity except for Carol-and, she was my only daughter. I began to grow very torn between things, realizing the situation was one which not only involved morals but also physical needs. I decided to try a whore.
I told Carol that I had to go to San Francisco on business. I left her with a friend and drove up towards Las Vegas. The cold desert air and wearisome drive relieved me somewhat and I began to feel much better. I stopped in the gambling town and won twenty dollars at the '21' table, then headed out north from town to a place called 'Lisa's'.
The house was a large ranch style place surrounded with twinkling lights suspended in air like a used car lot. I drove the small gravel road to the front door and went inside. As far as I could see, there was no one else around. I seemed to be the only customer.
The living room was large and there were brown, leather chairs scattered all about. On one end there was a bar with a juke box playing an old Frank Sinatra record. At the other end, a fire raged in the fireplace, giving off some much needed warmth. A fat woman, looking the worse for her years greeted me.
"Would you like a girl?" She asked, trying to smile wickedly and trying to look like the madames of yesteryear.
I told her that I did. She sat me down on one of the stuffed chairs and asked me to wait. I smoked a cigarette and listened as two or three girls came giggling from behind the partition. One was tall, dark-haired and skinny. The other was plump, with flaming red-hair. The girl I chose immediately was blonde, like Carol, but with large tits revealed nicely through a thin tee shirt. She looked tired and bored, but I figured it was better than nothing.
She took me to a small bedroom at the end of the hallway. Her walls were lined with posters of famous rock stars, a guitar and pretty flowers. It was certainly a change from the places I visited during the war.
"What would you like to do?" She asked, sitting cross-legged on the bed so I could see the dark outline of her cunt beneath her panties.
"A little of everything ... if you know what I mean?"
"Okay," she replied, standing and lifting her teeshirt above her large, red nipples, "it'll cost thirty dollars."
I gave her thirty dollars and tried to joke with her. But she was all business and didn't want any part of it. She pulled down her panties and stepped out of them, then told me to undress. When I was naked, she took me into the bathroom where she washed off my pecker.
"You've got a nice cock, mister, real nice." She handled me easily with the years of experience behind her. I got hard as a rock while she washed me off, and she began jerking me off while the soap was still on.
She led me to the bed and pushed me back onto my back. She spread my legs and took the tip of my prick into her mouth. Her tongue worked the hole open and she concentrated herself there, stabbing and driving herself into that small opening. Then, after a few minutes of that, she lifted herself and stood at the edge of the bed. She threw one leg up onto the mattress, opening her little blonde cunt wide.
"Okay ... want to eat me out?" She asked, pulling apart her lips and looking away.
I put my mouth there and began licking her cunt. But nothing was really happening. She wasn't wet, and I could see her eyes wandering around the room, then out the window and sometimes even down at me. She made all the right noises, but it wasn't there. I couldn't blame her, either, because after having had so many men, there must come a point when it just doesn't matter anymore. My little whore had obviously reached that a long time ago. When she finally rolled over, spread her legs and invited me inside, I threw my prick up into her and came quickly. I wanted out of there because I was being plagued with only one thought-and that was of Carol walking naked in front of me. It was an image which had been coming now quite frequently and no matter what I did, it remained to haunt me.
I left 'Lisa's' place in a hurry, driving the desert wastes back home to see the one woman in the world I cared for-my daughter.
When I got back home, I picked up Carol and drove her back to the house. She seemed very eager to know what I had done while I was away. Of course, I couldn't tell her so I lied about meeting business associates. But with each new question, I saw in her what I had been seeking. She looked so young and fresh, so eager and unsure of herself. She was driving me crazy.
Then, finally, when we were only five minutes from our house, she asked me.
"Daddy, what do you do for sex?"
I asked her what made her ask a question like that. She told me that the girls thought something was wrong because I didn't have a girl-friend or anything, and that there was no way for me to have sex. I laughed, but Carol was serious about the whole thing and really wanted to know.
"You're always alone, daddy,' she purred, inching closer to me, "and that isn't right. I mean, don't you get nervous and everything?"
I couldn't believe it. The younger generation was certainly growing up faster than we had. I tried to avoid the question but found myself digging deeper and deeper into a pit from which I couldn't escape. Finally, Carol put her slim, white hand on my thigh and looked up at me with sultry, clouded eyes-the kind older women have when the bedroom lurks just at the end of the hallway.
"Could I help you? I mean, I'm a woman, too, and mommy really let you have it, didn't she?"
My hands were sweating like crazy. Carol slid her hand further up my thigh until her fingers rested just at the edge of my aching balls.
"No honey," I replied, now trying to sound like a father, "you shouldn't involve yourself in my problems. After all, you've got your own life to lead."
"But I love you. And right now, we're all we've got to each other. I mean, there's no one else for either of us, is there?"
Her fingers now had hold of my sacs and she was searching out the balls, kneading them and playing with them.
"They're big, aren't they?" she asked, her breathing becoming heavy and woman-like. She had the zipper of my pants in her hands and was riding it down across the bulge which had developed there. Finally, after struggling, she managed to get it over my prick and down.
"I don't know anything, daddy, you've got to teach me."
Obviously, I thought, she has spoken with Sally. The little bitch has told her about that night when I fucked her probably the best she had ever been fucked. But then again, Carol had seen everything, and everything she was doing now was part of her own desire. She hadn't spoken with anyone, but had reached this decision on her own.
"Carol," I said, shaking as her fingers dug inside my pants, "do you realize what you are doing?"
"Oh yes, daddy, I really do. I don't see anything wrong with it, do you?"
I couldn't answer her. Her warm fingers, so slim and tender, were now wrapped around my cock. She worked and struggled until finally bringing my stick out into the open air. She held it in her hand, staring at it with her mouth hanging open and her eyes a very wide-open blue.
"God, it's huge! I remember the times I used to spy on you and mommy in the shower. But it always just kind of drooped, and really didn't look that big."
But now, she held me in full bloom. Her hands moved lightly up and down the length, stopping at the tip and exploring that then moving on down the shaft. She found the ridge underneath and drove her fingernail down that, almost an expert at age fifteen!
"Daddy?"
"Yes, Carol..." I replied, shaking like a leaf and trying to keep the car on the road.
"Daddy, do you mind if I give you a blow job?"
Her lips were wide open, ready to take me inside as she knelt down across my lap. I focused on the road ahead, watching the people walking, going through their everyday routines, secretly knowing that if they knew what was happening in this car they would banish me from the community forever.
Carol sucked hard on my rod, pulling as much of it inside her mouth as possible. She played at that for a while then drove her tongue down along the ridge. Her mouth was warm and smooth, her teeth-straight and even. She rode up and down, her head bobbing up against the steering wheel.
"I'm coming, sweetie ... "
I thought she'd pull off, but instead, she kept at it. Her hands were at my hips, and with them she pulled my pelvis up into her mouth. I shot the stuff off and she choked a little as she tried to swallow it all. I looked down and could see the white, heavy liquid pouring from the corners of her soft, ruby lips. When I was finished, and she had swallowed everything, she looked up towards me with her light, blue eyes and smiled.
"There," she said, still holding my twitching cock in her small hands, "feel better?"
She was like a vision. I had never noticed just how pretty she really was. With the white stuff hardening at the corners of her mouth, she looked like a real woman. She was my daughter, I had raised her, but at this moment, she looked like nothing that was related to me. She was a beautiful, desirable woman who had just given me the greatest blow job I had ever had.
When we got home, we were both a little uncomfortable. Neither of us really knew where to go from here, and we kind of shuffled around the house like two strangers. Finally, Carol walked up to me, I was sitting on the couch, and stood quite proudly in front.
"Undress me ... please ... I want to show you what I look like."
I reached up and took the buttons of her blouse and undid them one by one. When the shirt hung open, the tops of her white tits were visible pouring over the white lace of her bra. I ran my hands across the smooth skin, so firm and taut, and she cried out.
"No one's ever touched me before. You're the first."
The blouse slid down easily across her shoulders. I wanted to go slowly, savoring each new inch of virgin skin revealed to me.
Her stomach was hard and flat, and her little belly button intercepted the crease that ran from between her breasts and would eventually become her untouched crack.
I ran my tongue down along that crease, and she held onto my head, pushing me down further and further. With my free hands, I reached up behind her and unfastened the bra. The material fell away from her breasts, the small, pointed sacs bouncing just slightly with their new freedom. Then, Carol took a step backwards, threw out her chest towards me to make herself seem larger, and waited for my opinion.
"Do you like them?" She asked, unsure of herself.
"They're the most beautiful breasts I've ever seen!"
She smiled broadly, then moved back towards me so that the nipples, which were now hard and pointed, were at my mouth. I took the succulent little bud into my mouth and bit it gently.
"Ooooh ... dadeeee ... please . ... " She cried, letting her long blonde hair fall across the nape of my neck. I sucked and tweaked her nipples, playing with the bounce and firmness of her tits until she was writhing in pleasure.
"Please," she cried, swinging her head back and forth, "the rest of me ... do the rest of me!"
I reached down between us and unzipped her jeans. She stepped back and I pulled the garment down over her hips and down the length of her legs. Clumsily, she stepped out of them and we both laughed. Now, she stood naked except for the tiny ribbon of material that was her panties. I could see beneath the sheer material the dark tuft of her blonde hair. Her eyes were upon me, weighing every nuance to determine just how I would accept her young, firm body.
Then, as though in a striptease, she wriggled the panties ever so slowly down across the golden tuft of her cunt. With each inch, her little, tight crack became more and more revealed until finally I could see where it ran up between her legs. When she was naked, she once again took a step backwards and waited for my opinion.
"You are the most gorgeous creature I have ever seen!"
"Oh, daddy, you're so very nice!"
I grabbed her from behind, feeling the strength and tightness of her small ass, and pulled her towards me. I buried my face in her soft, sweet little pie and began searching with my tongue for the magical cleft between her legs.
Carol drew her legs apart, wrapping her slim thighs around my head, and opened herself to my tongue. I rode her smooth crack up and down its length, then found her pearl and began licking and stabbing at it.
"Oh, God," she cried, pushing her vagina up against my hungry tongue, "I never knew it could feel so good!"
I drove and plunged with my tongue as far into her as I could, feeling the tight smoothness of her vagina. That cunt that had never been touched or invaded was a new land for me, a world to which men had previously been denied. Now, with my tongue as an extension of the pulsating meat between my legs, I was exploring this sacred territory.
Carol was pushing up against me with a ferocity of one who had engaged in sex for years. She wanted to get there, and at least knew there was someplace to go. Her hands were pulling me inside her, trying to get the entirety of my head buried between her long, lean legs. Finally, she pushed me away.
"Fuck me, daddy, please fuck me!! ! "
She grabbed at my pants as I stood up before her. She was eager as hell, and finally managed to pull down my slacks across my prong. I stood in front of her with my stick standing straight out like a pole. She took it between her hands and rubbed it very gently.
"It's beautiful," she moaned, "put it between my legs. Put it all the way inside me . . .hurry!! ! "
She fell backwards onto the carget and spread her legs. Her pink crack was swollen and moist. She brought her legs up then let them fall aside, revealing as much of her cunt to me as she could. There was a look of almost terrified suspension on her face, a look which told of her anticipation for the act that was to come.
I knelt down over her and put my mouth to hers. She drew me in, then opened widely and explored my mouth with her tongue. It was a quick, little tongue, unsure of the terrain but going forth anyway with a tremendous amount of guts. She was quite a little tiger, this daughter of mine, and I wanted her for the rest of my life. I knew deep down inisde me that no one would ever be able to satisfy me after her, that she would be the only one who could ever make this way. It was a fearful thought, and one that almost made me go soft.
But our bodies were entangling like the gnarled branches of a tree. Her legs were opened widely, and even outside her cunt I could feel the warmth that was flooding from her like a volcano.
"Inside ... hurry, put it inside!! ! "
With both hands, she reached underneath me and held the shaft that was soon to invade the cunt of my virgin daughter. Slowly, with her strong hips arched upwards she moved the tip of my prick to the entrance of her sweet valley.
I held on hard, trying to contain my excitement, as I felt myself slipping inside her. The smooth, wet walls of her vagina parted as my cock entrenched itself inside. We both stopped breathing with each new inch that was invaded, holding onto to our own sensibilities so that we could get the most pleasure out of it. Finally, I was all the way inside.
"It feels like I'm totally there..." Carol moaned, whispering in my ear and flicking her little tongue around inside.
Then I began pumping: Slowly at first and with each stroke a cry of passion coming from her. She held on, never tightening up but allowing herself to ride with my plunges. Then she, too, began pumping back. Answering with jagged, uneven strokes, she kept up with me and began to groove entirely with the motion. Deeper and deeper I plunged, almost afraid that I would devastate her womb. But she glided pretty well, and seemed to catch on quickly as to the needed movements.
Then I could no longer hold it back. The stuff shot from me, draining me of every ounce of energy and lifting me right out of the scene.
"Ooooh ... come, daddy, come ... come all the way inside me, please come!! ! "
Her nails were digging frantically into my back as I jerked and spasmed. The stuff seemed to just keep pouring out, like it had been there for years waiting only for this moment when I really let it all go. Carol kept the ride alive, throwing herself up against me, then letting down easily, then pushing herself once again into me. Finally, I was spent and collapsed on top of her. Her musty breathing was heavy and clouded. The fifteen year old body, contained the soul of a woman. We were quiet for a long time until finally Carol spoke.-
"I'll never want another man, daddy, do you know that?"
"Yes," I replied, knowing exactly what she meant.
Life from then on became one paradise. Carol and I never spent a moment without each other. We were two, new people who had only by chance been living together as father and daughter. Everything about our lives became new and fresh, but beneath it all there was a certain sense of something happening that made it seem only temporary.
We were both aware of how society felt about what we were doing and this knowledge began to eat at both of us. Carol became uncertain about a lot of things and less and less certain about us. While her girl friends were engaged in seeking out boyfriends and dates, Carol was involved in an affair that would always separate her from her peers. Then, one night when she was sixteen, she spoke the truth-a fact that I had not wanted to face.
We were laying in bed together. Carol had just finished sucking me off. Now, she held my limp prick in her hand and was playing with it like it was some kind of toy.
"Daddy?"
"Yes," I answered, knowing that something was coming which I didn't want to hear.
"I'm leaving home tonight. There's a boy ... we're going to live together."
That was the end of everything. She did leave and for the next five months all I could do with myself was mope. It was as though everything inside me had been drained out, there was nothing left. The scene with her had been the best one I could ever have, and I knew it. There was no doubt in my mind that I reached the complete fulfillment of my own sexual adventures with my own daughter.
Since that time, I have read many books on the subject of incest. I know the effect she had on me will never wear off. I only hope that I can forget enough so that I can make it with another woman someday. Also, I hope that Carol has worked out those things inside herself that made her do what she did. After having read her letters, I am sure that she has accomplished much in that direction and will be able to find a happy life for herself.
SUMMARY
Sigmund Freud astounded the world when he spoke of the incestual drive as one of the strongest sexual wishes in man. His premise contended that fathers wish to sleep with their daughters and mothers with their sons. Freud went on to say that much of mankind's drives and ambitions were only the result of this drive.
In Harry's case, this wish was profoundly fulfilled. There were a number of facts involved in his case which allowed the situation to occur, and these are very important in a discussion of this phenomena.
Alfred Kinsey, in his report written in 1948, made the observation that incest occurs in lower income families where the father is at home and finds his own self-image destroyed because of lack of profession, etc. But in our case, we are dealing with people who live twenty years after the Kinsey report and things have changed.
Carol was the prime mover in this case because of her precociousness and education. It is a well known fact that today's teenagers are much better educated and much more sophisticated than were the youngsters a generation ago. Because of this fact, Carol was able to instigate the relationship between her father and herself. She might also have been aware enough to realize that indeed, she did desire to have a sexual relationship with her own father. Being of broad mind and awareness, she then promoted the relationship and engaged enthusiastically in it.
Harry, on the other hand, was the victim of a number of circumstances. Being left with his daughter by his wife, he was thrown into a situation where the sexual stimulus of the girl's young body was present, but the age-old taboo prevented him from acting upon his desires. Sally, being the forerunner of his daughter, provided Harry with breakthrough in his own morality. She, too, was precocious and aware, and acted upon her knowledge. She provided Harry with what possibly might have been the necessary catalyst which, in the future, would allow him to have relations with his own daughter.
The environment also produced in Harry the essential motivations and thoughts that would lead him to sex with Carol. His visit to the prostitute left him empty and unsatisfied, both sexually and emotionally. Upon returning, his own daughter seemed to sense this crisis within him. At this point, she offered herself to him and he accepted. Thus, the relationship between them as father and daughter was lifted and instead, they became man and woman to each other.
In this case, we see that basically both Harry and Carol became aware of their own psychological needs as defined by Freud. In so doing, they were able to handle the situation and to make the necessary adjustments when the affair was over. Harry's own process of self-education will prevent him from desperation and sorrow and will, instead, most likely lead him into a happier life.
CHAPTER THREE
Jennie L. is a twenty-year old now attending school in California and working as a waitress. She is extremely beautiful, with a finely built body and long, blonde hair enhancing the blue shimmer of her eyes. But this look of innocence is quickly broken upon speaking with her.
Jennie was born and raised in a small town in Kansas. Her mother left her father when she was three, and being the only child up to that point, she was raised by him. Her father was a man of emotion and passion, working in the oil fields and living the rough, rugged life of a pseudo-pioneer.
As the years passed, Jennie and her father grew very close because they gave to each other what only they could-love. The young girl grew up quickly, taking on the responsibilities of the home and attending school at the same time. It was during this period, when she was sixteen, that her story begins.
As she related the details of those years to me, I found within her a worldliness otherwise undetectable in the beautiful young girl. Obviously, as a result of the conditions of her life, she had grown up in every way possible.
I never really knew my mother. The only memories I really had of her was through the old pictures Jack, my father, kept in the dresser. She was a beautiful woman, tall and stately, and I could see why Jack had loved her so much. But I suppose that after she left him, there was no one in the world who could ever get that kind of love from him. Just the way he acted, and the amount he drank, I knew he was suffering horribly-but there was nothing anyone could do.
I was sixteen that summer and had just begun to develop an interest in sex. My body was good, and I used to like to stand in front of the big mirror we had in the hallway and pose for myself. I would wear only my bra and panties, but then begin dancing and slowly, like a stripper, remove them. When I was naked, I would throw my hips out, staring down at my blonde hair between my legs, and think of myself as a model for one of those big magazines. I guess every girl went through that kind of scene.
One afternoon, when it was really hot, I stripped and went to my mirror. There was a gloss to my skin, and my body was shining in the darkness of that hallway. My hair was damp and hung in little ringlets across my shoulders, the ends just barely touching the tips of my nipples.
I suppose that is what began to turn me on-the feeling of my hair there on my nipples. I mean, they really began to ache and then began pointing outwards and throbbing. I touched them lightly with my fingers, feeling the electricity flowing through. me, riding upwards from my tits and into my shoulders. As I stood there, my eyes began to unfocus and soften, and the more I touched myself, the less I was able to see the reflection of my own naked body.
My breasts, even then, were pretty large. I lifted up one of them and bent my head down. I wanted so much to suck myself that I got a cramp in my neck from leaning down so hard to touch the pink nipples. Finally, I was able to just graze the edge with my tongue. At that time, I thought that it had been the greatest thrill a girl could ever have. But I hadn't as of that time really noticed that I had a vagina.
After licking myself, and driving myself crazy, I began to feel the moisture kind of dripping down between my thighs. I was standing with my legs spread wide apart, and the breezes were kind of drifting between them making my prickly hair tingle and shift.
I stood erect and let my hands wander down across the front of my body. I was pleased with the hardness of my stomach, and with the way my skin seemed to round softly into the triangle of blonde hair. I was good looking then, and I knew it. The thought that a man, with a penis that was hard and huge would desire me and would want to plant his weapon between my legs sent shivers up my spine. Until then, I had only seen one penis, and that was my father's. Some nights, when .he was really drunk, he would walk around the house in the nude. That pink thing would just dangle and bounce, with his balls weaving back and forth as he walked. I used to enjoy seeing him that way, but never dreamed that his sex would someday be between my legs.
My fingers were pulling apart the soft, white petals and going inside. I found my clit and began toying with it, shooting spasm after spasm of electricity throughout my body. It was an incredible feeling, and I felt like I could stand there naked forever and play with myself. Then, I pushed my fingers up my vagina and felt the warm, moist skin there throb and pulsate with my touch. I came then, for the first time in my life. It was that day when I began to worry about the possibly that I might have been a nymphomaniac because for the next few weeks the only thoughts I had were of huge, hard cocks. Every boy I looked at was nothing more to me than that piece of meat dangling between his legs, that piece that I wanted inside myself so much.
My fever was burning me up, and there seemed nothing to do with it but play with myself. I even got to the point where I would run around the backyard for hours in the nude, rubbing myself up against anything that was hard. I began to feel like a burning bush, and my cunt needed somebody to put out the fire.
Then one afternoon it came, and I came and he came. His name was Bill, and he was a salesman. I think he was selling books or magazines or something like that. Anyway, I had been sitting in my bedroom, naked of course, when the doorbell rang. I was getting so bored and uptight about everything that I had the idea of answering the door stark naked-you know, just to see the reaction of whoever was there when they saw me. But then again, I decided that it could have been someone we knew and that would have been really embarrassing. So, I threw on an old tee shirt that just covered my cunt, and went to the door.
Bill was big and handsome, wearing a smile which he probably used for everyone he tried to pawn his stupid books off on. His eyes traveled up and down my body, and I could feel my nipples pushing out strongly from inside the shirt.
"I'm selling books, dear, and wondered if you might be interested?" His voice was shaky, it was obvious that he liked me.
I invited him inside, ready to play with him a little and decrease the boredom of my day. He took a seat next to the fireplace and began taking out magazines from his briefcase. I sat opposite him on the couch, and drew my legs up underneath me. I spread my thighs just a little, and knew by the way he looked between my legs that he could see just a touch of my pubic hair. I was thrilled.
"Now," He said, his eyes still wandering around between my legs, "I've got all sorts of interesting books which you might want to cunt ... I mean, consider for yourself ... "
His voice just trailed off. I remained smiling, then shifted my body a little and threw my feet back onto the floor. With my legs properly held together, I suddenly let the thighs fall apart. Now, he had a great look at not only my cunt hair, but also at my vagina. I felt myself begin to moisten.
"I think," I said, feeling like a woman of the world, "that you like what I have better than I like what you've got."
"I should say so!" He replied.
"It's not fair, though..." I said, standing and lifting the bottom of my teeshirt to my waist, "I should be able to see something of you!"
He leaned back in his chair, let out a deep breath, and laughed. Obviously, he had not expected something like me when he had knocked at our door.
"I'll do the best I can, little lady, yes indeed, I'll do the best I can!"
I went over to him and he took me in his arms. We kissed long and hard and I opened my mouth wide so that our tongues met and lashed at one another. I let my hand fall around his waist, then moved it down front and stroked his bulge. He was already hard and seemed to throb beneath my touch.
He reached behind me and drew my tee shirt over my ass and began rubbing my cheeks together. Then he ran his fingers down my crack and came up from underneath to grab my mount. I shuddered as he fingered my pearl, stroking it gently and with much care.
"Let me have your prick ... hurry, I want it inside me!! ! "
I was lost and didn't know anymore what I was saying. It was like a dream, I mean, all those afternoons masturbating in front of the mirror and now the real thing was happening. I was kind of flying, and did not even know where I was anymore.
I pulled at his zipper, then, and drew out his dick, he was long and thick, and the skin shone from the juices. It was like holding an electric charge in my hands, I didn't know when it would go off.
"I want to suck it?" I didn't have to ask. I kneeled down in front of him and blew hot air onto the pink, throbbing head. He held the back of my head and began pushing me towards him. I opened my mouth and took the length of his prick in between my lips. The feeling of having that thing stuffed down my throat was weird, and I was hoping that he wouldn't shoot his load until after I got my mouth away. I thought I would choke if his stuff poured out into me. But he didn't.
Now, it was my turn. He stripped off my teeshirt and pushed me back onto the floor. He knelt above me for a second, looking over my body and smiling.
"You're beautiful, baby, beautiful!"
He began kissing me all over. First on the mouth, then on the neck and then to my tits. The nipples were hard and aching, and I was swooning as he took my buds between his teeth and gently rolled them around.
"Ooooh ... God ... careful ... please!" I moaned, pushing his head against my breasts, wanting him to come inside my skin.
Then he began licking me. He rode his tongue all the way down the center of my stomach, until he reached the top of my cunt. He played around with the little hairs there, and then plunged downwards into my valley.
Then, he turned and shifted himself. He took my legs and spread them apart as wide as possible, then threw his prick up against my face. I handled his balls, rubbing them together and stroking his cock.
"Put it in your mouth!" He mumbled. I took his prick and stuffed it between my lips. Then he moved his mouth to the opening of my vagina and began licking around in there. I thought I would explode as he drove his tongue deep inside me, playing with my pearl and licking the juices that were flowing there.
When I felt him begin to come, I tried to pull my mouth away but it was too late. The white, hot liquid spurted from him with a lot of force and shot down into my throat. At that moment, I too, began to come and felt my vagina rippling and pulsating beneath his ravaging tongue.
Finally, we were both still, laying naked at each others' sex on the floor of my house. We hadn't even introduced each other and didn't know each others' names. It was a weird feeling and I felt strangely displaced ... kind of unable to see or make out anything familiar in my surrounding. But then I realized the reason for this was because it was late, much too late, and Jack was due home from work at any moment.
That was quite a scene when Jack came home to find me and some stranger naked on the living room floor. Not only were we nude, but I had Billy's cock in my mouth and was blowing him again to get him hard so he could fuck me.
Well, Jack took this guy, lifted him three feet off the ground, and threw him out the front door. I had to laugh when I saw Billy running naked down the street, trying to step into his pants and tripping and falling all over the sidewalk.
Jack then turned to me. I began shaking, trying to cover my body because I could tell that he was half angry with me and half looking at my naked skin. It made me excited in a really strange way, and I think today that we both knew we were turning each other on.
"You go to your room, and stay there!! ! " He screamed, watching my ass as I moved out of the living room.
I didn't bother to get dressed. There was something in the air that I couldn't describe, something that made me feel daring and open. I lay back on my bed, spread my legs as though daring someone to look up my twat, and watched the darkness fall across the ceiling. I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew Jack was standing above the bed. I didn't bother to close my legs or cover myself ... I think now I wanted him to see that I was a woman-all woman.
"Only tramps do what you did today ... you're a little whore!"
I smiled at him because he was trying to get angry yet the sight of my naked body was turning him on. He kind of just stood there, saying the words and not meaning them, even as he spoke.
"I forbid you ever to leave this house, at least for a month you'll stay in here and try and act like a lady!"
"Do you think I'm pretty?" I asked, arching my pelvis up towards him. My crack felt as wide open as the Grand Canyon, and his eyes were riveted on my hole.
"That's got nothing to do with it!" But his voice was weakening and he began stammering. Then, he let his hand fall onto my thigh. I moaned softly and smiled.
"I want you, daddy, I want you so bad I hurt!! ! "
Even to this day I don't know what really made me do the things I did that day. It seemed like once I made the move with Billy, everything came tumbling down and it didn't matter anymore. Nothing existed that would make any difference whether or not I fucked him, my father or some cat off the streets. I just suddenly had this urge between my legs and the need to have it filled.
Jack stood above me, aware that he was touching his daughter and aware that there was something wrong with that. But he continued stroking my skin, moving his hand easily up and down my leg. Then he got higher on my thigh and went underneath. He held the skin there for a second, then moved higher yet. His knuckles were touching my lips, which were by then burning with heat and running juices like crazy from deep within my vagina.
"Ooo-oh ... touch me there ... please, touch me!" I cried.
He obeyed and moved his hand right up against my cunt. Then he slid his finger up inside my vagina and let it rest there. I was creaming like crazy, and going dizzy with excitement.
"This isn't right, baby, it just won't work."
"Why not? I mean, we love each other, right? And we don't have anyone else and we want to be with each other. What difference does your being my father make?"
He smiled down towards me with that big, toothy grin of his and chuckled. "It'll make a lot of difference to everyone else, that's who!"
"But they don't matter, do they?" I was afraid that I'd seen something of fear in him, something which doesn't look attractive in any man.
He answered me, though, by pulling his finger out of my hole and throwing his head between my legs. His tongue began working expertly on my clit, twirling that bud with smoothness and surety of motion. I lay back against the already damp sheets and found myself floating towards heights which I never even dreamed of.
His mouth and lips felt warm against my throbbing skin, But when he dove inside me with his tongue, spreading the walls there I felt like I would split apart.
I finally got him to turn around, like Billy and I had done earlier in the day, and I struggled with his fly until I found his snake ready to uncoil. His prick seemed to grow in my hand, reaching towards me and becoming heavier and bigger with each throb. Finally, the thing looked to be fully grown and I put my lips to it.
Daddy thrust his hips towards me as I sucked his prong deep inside my mouth. He moved like he was fucking me, thrusting in and out of my mouth. I thought if he pushed any harder, he would jam that huge thing of his right out the back of my neck.
Then, I pulled the thing away from my mouth and began breathing again.
"Fuck me, put it inside...! ! ! " I begged, as he lifted his wet-mouth from between my legs. His eyes were all shiny, and he seemed real determined. There was no doubt that he was really enjoying fucking with me.
As he lifted himself above me, I reached under and held his balls. After giving each one a gentle squeeze, I took his prick and guided it from the base to the hole which waited for it.
"Easy ... please, be careful ... " I pouted. The tip was against my clit and I rubbed it there for a second then let it fall to the opening. Carefully, slowly, I glided his staff through the pearly gates and into my darkness. With each new inch that entered me, I felt more and more I would explode. It was like every bit of blood that I had was being drained down to that one spot, that hot, wet and exploding skin between my legs.
Finally, he was all the way inside. We waited for a second, I trying to catch my breath and he trying to hold himself back a little. I suppose he wanted to come right then and there because we had been going at it for such a long time already. But he just kind of tightened up, and I clamped my legs around his stick and held him inside me.
"I love the feel of it there ... it's so big, there's nothing of me left!"
"Oh, there's plenty of you left, little daughter, plenty!"
Then he began pumping. Slowly at first, he began building until his balls were slapping like crazy against my ass. I rode with his every plunge, feeling myself skyrocket each time that piece of meat dove heavier inside.
Then I reached up behind him and stuck my finger into his ass-hole. I just left it there until I felt him begin to throb like an out of control machine inside. With each great spurt of his come, I pulled my finger out just a little more until finally-bang! I just snapped the entire ass-hole closed. Boy, did he go for that! After he had finished, and while he was still inside me, he laughed and told me that that had been the greatest fuck of his entire lifetime. It made me feel good to know that I had been better than Mom ... and I was determined to get even better.
I felt different when I started school that year because of what had happened to me that summer. The boys seemed young and immature, and the girls seemed like little girls instead of women. I had been balling my own father all summer, and my vagina was sore most of the time because of his prick. But that soreness between my legs, that feeling of really having been entered gave me something over the other girls at school. I really didn't belong there and knew it, but I also knew I must finish.
I began to play with the whole idea of sex a little. There was this dance one night and this guy named Kurt asked me outside where the couples went to neck. I decided to really lay one on him that he would never forget. He took me into his arms like everyone and began kissing me hard. Our mouths were open and his tongue dove deeply into my mouth, scraping my teeth and kind of exploring.
"You don't really want this, do you?" I asked, drawing away from him. His face was confused and then shocked, as I slid my hand up between his legs and cupped his balls.
"A good strong prick shouldn't go to waste, now should it?"
He was speechless as I moved my head down to his groin. I unzipped his pants and drew his cock out into the night air. He was twitching and nervous as I held the stem in my hand, blowing hot air onto the tip.
"Yes," I moaned, "you've got a real nice pecker here!"
Then I put my lips around the tip, just holding it slightly at the end, and opened his hole with my tongue. He began shivering from the excitement, and as I pulled the entire length of him into my mouth, he came immediately. I swallowed his come, feeling some spilling into the corners of my mouth, and dried him up. As I licked the space between his balls I heard him telling me how much he loved me and how he wanted to marry me. I felt like telling him that that was impossible because I was balling my own father, but decided against it.
Instead, I kissed him lightly on the cheek and made my way back inside to join the rest of the kids. I was a woman amongst them and there was no way I would ever fit in again. So I made up my mind that at least I would blow a few minds and have some fun.
After a few weeks in school, I met Cindy. She was a tall, good-looking brunette who seemed to always be trying to make eye contact with me. One day, after exchanging looks with each other, we finally spoke. I found out that she had come from New York City and was strangely amused by the way in which the kids acted. We began talking about sex, and soon it was revealed that we both had balled before.
"You like it?" She asked, as we wandered out into the park just outside of school.
I told her that I did, but refused to tell her that I was fucking my own father. Then she made a curious remark about women knowing so much more about how to please a woman that only women could provide satisfaction.
"You can't mean that," I replied, suddenly feeling there was a hell of a lot about sex I didn't know, "Oh," she replied, stroking my hair as we sat on the grass, "I know it's true. I've tried it, and it's really something."
For some reason I got really jealous. I mean, here I was walking around school like the queen of sex and suddenly there was somebody who knew more than I did. I let her stroke my hair, and then I let her kiss me on the mouth.
"Did you like that?" Cindy asked, pulling herself away and searching my eyes.
I couldn't help telling her how much I enjoyed her touch. She was very gentle and kind, and the way in which she stroked me made me feel like a real woman. I knew what was coming, and I knew if I let go any further what would happen, but there was something nice about her that I didn't want to turn down.
"I liked it very much, Cindy," I replied, then I began stroking her hair, and pulled her close to me. I kissed her on the mouth, slashing my tongue inside her mouth and feeling her up there around her warm in-sides.
"Ooooh, baby," she moaned when I pulled away, "you know how to do it!"
I put my hand on her breast and began stroking her there. She was well built, and I could feel her nipples begin to harden beneath her sweater.
Then we fell to the ground in a tumble.
Immediately, our legs were locked together and we were pushing our cunts up against each other.
"Oh, God, finger me ... finger me!! ! "
I lifted up her short dress and rubbed her thighs. She was thrashing her legs, spreading them back and forth and finally allowing me to go up between them. I found the edge of her silk panties and touched her there. She was soft and wet, and she groaned loudly when my fingers began pushing in against the soft silk.
Cindy reached up behind herself and pulled down her panties. She was naked underneath her skirt, now, and I dove with my fingers inside. Her cunt was warm and good to the touch.
"You feel silken ... warm and smooth." I said, as I played inside her. She was laying back on the grass, with her legs spread wide apart. It was still daylight, and I was praying that no one would walk by us, because if they did they could have seen everything.
"Eat me, baby, eat me!" She moaned. I pulled her legs apart and peered into her pink, moist cunt wondering at the same moment what exactly I was doing. I mean, this was the act of a lesbian, and now, because I was putting my mouth to her cunt, I, too, was a lesbian.
At least at the moment that's what I thought. Then I began to realize as I really got into licking her crack that it was only pleasure, and it really didn't make any difference where that pleasure came from. It was kind of funny, but I worked out this entire theory while I was eating her out.
"Ooooh ... it feels wonderful. Turn around and let me have at you!"
I swung my hips around so that my crotch was facing her head. She ripped at my panties and pulled them down across my knees. Then, she lifted my dress up and I threw my leg over her head. She blew warm air onto me, driving her breath up into my vagina by spreading my lips there with her fingers.
Then she put her mouth to me. I had been eaten out by Jack before, but it was never as good as this. Cindy seemed to know every little place, every little move that would really turn me on. I had heard that theory before that says that women are the only ones really capable of giving another woman pleasure-and I was becoming a believer rather quickly.
I came with more force than I had ever come before. A second later, Cindy came and we rocked and moaned with each other's cunt firmly implanted on each other's mouth. When we finally rolled over, pulled down our dresses, we began wondering if anyone had actually seen us. I mean, we were practically naked out there and it was pretty obvious to anyone passing by just exactly what we were doing to each other. But as we talked and discussed the possibility, it occurred to both of us that it really didn't matter. I guess the more things I did with my body, the more I wandered out of that state of mind where you really care what anyone thinks about you. I mean, they all get their kicks, so why shouldn't I? It was fast becoming the kind of world where the old rules and laws didn't make sense anymore. The only thing that really seemed to have any bearing-on me personally was my own pleasure-and I was beginning to know that I would risk anything for that pleasure.
The sex with Cindy changed my relationship with my father a lot. At first, I tried to act as though nothing strange or out of the ordinary had happened, but each time he tried to fuck me or make me give him a blow job, I could feel the change inside me. It was like there was someone else calling out from my own skin, someone I had never met but who would linger in the background all the time. I knew I had to see Cindy again, and it was at Jack's expense that I began seeing her regularly.
Then one night she stayed over at my house. Playing the role of two innocent teenagers, we said goodnight to Jack and crept into bed. I don't really know if he had any suspicions because we had been balling, but I am sure he must have thought something.
Once in bed, we threw off out nightgowns and nakedly clutched at each other as though we had been long lost lovers who had been reunited after years away from each other.
"I love you, Jennie..." She whispered as her hand rode up my thigh and rested on my cunt. I took her fingers and kissed them, then placed each one inside me. She began moving in there, then kissed my breasts, then roamed down towards my crack where she applied her tongue with all the skill she had.
I didn't notice the door to the bedroom open, it took me a few minutes of quickly growing shock to know that Jack was standing above us. When I had finally made that realization, I threw Cindy off of me.
"Daddy!! ! "
"So this is a typical teenage slumber party! They were never like this when I was a kid!" He was laughing. I guess sometimes I think adults just haven't been around, but usually they've lived twice as long and have experienced twice as much.
"Won't you join us?" It was Cindy, sitting naked with her legs crossed at the foot of the bed inviting my father into the sack with us. I suppose she thought that she was doing something real daring, I had never told her about Jack and me.
He was naked and hard in a matter of three seconds. Cindy seemed to take to his prick quickly, and before I knew it, she had him inside her mouth.
"Roll over sweetie..." He said as he lay down on the bed, his cock still being stroked by Cindy's smooth lips.
I rolled over, spread my legs and pulled his head towards me. He dived in quickly, circling my clit with his tongue then driving it as deeply as he could inside my vagina. Then Cindy swung her hips around and I had her cunt at my mouth. We were a three-way team, father-daughter-and best friend. It was pretty strange, and there was a certain amount of something unfamiliar in the air which I couldn't explain to myself.
As we all came together, I knew that it would be the last time. I knew that to look at Cindy and my father as they made love to each other, and to me, was to give me a strange perspective on myself that I couldn't fathom. The next morning, I left that house, with Cindy and my father asleep naked in each other's arms.
SUMMARY
The environment which produced Jennie's experience with incest was typical of those reported by Kinsey of such behavior. The close proximity of father and daughter allowed the situation to progress to the point where the actual case of incest was committed.
The first act of incest which occurred after the salesman represents a distinct example of the unconscious at work. In Jennie's case, the initial experience of that afternoon, with the traumatic shock of her 'first boy' and the strangeness with which that experience occurred actually served to unleash her subconscious. She began functioning in a dream-like state, one in which her normal inhibitions and desires were superceded by the strong and powerful thrust of her libido. Satisfaction and sensual delights became her chief goals, and she did not care how she arrived at those goals, as long as she did.
The father, Jack, also was working under a release of unconscious elements. In the first place, his routine job which he endured after his wife had left him somehow worked to abolish his sense of identity. This is a very common phenomenon amongst men who have been thrust from normal emotional patterns which they developed in marriage. Secondly, the factor of finding his daughter with the strange man might have triggered something inside him which was nothing more than replay of the break-up of his own marriage. Thus, we see both the father and the daughter being thrust into a state where the 'normal' rules and laws of society simply do not exist.
This abandonment of society's edicts regarding human sexual behavior affected Jennie quite highly as evidenced by her actions with Cindy. The pattern of experimentation, along with her desire to replace the lost love of her mother, led the young girl into a lesbian relationship.
The culmination of the somnambulist-like series of events was on the night when all three finally engaged in sexual intimacies. It was here that Jennie knew she didn't know. In other words, the fine line of thought or reason which had been holding her to both Jack and Cindy was broken by the stark reality of their actions. Jennie could no longer participate in the dream state of her life without having some concrete answers. It is this author's opinion that Jennie will, indeed, find those answers.
CHAPTER FOUR
Bill S. is forty-nine years old. He lives alone in a small bachelor apartment in San Francisco. At one time, he was a happily married man with a beautiful wife and a lovely daughter. But all that has changed, now, and it is the events which led up to this change that we shall concern ourselves with here.
Tall, lanky and with a very open personality, Bill was candid about his life. He seemed at once to desire strict condemnation of his activities while at the same time to relive them again. This duality was a central psychological problem at the time of this interview and since that time, he has supposedly resolved much of his anguish.
Using a tape recorder, I spent twelve hours in Bill's apartment taping our conversation. At no time did I have to prompt him, it was obvious from the outset that he had thought his situation through without the outside promotion of an interviewer. So, basically there was not much for me to do but to sit and listen while this man revealed the most intimate details of his remarkable 'change.'
June and I had been happily married for seventeen years. I was a successful businessman and we had all the comforts of the good life-two cars, a nice suburban home, and a great daughter. We had everything anyone could expect from life. But as our seventeenth wedding anniversary approached, June and I both realized that we were bored.
My wife was a beautiful woman. She was tall, blonde and stacked. I remember the pride I used to feel whenever we went someplace and she wore a revealing dress. Her tits were about the finest I had ever seen--strong, uplifting topped with perfect nipples that always seemed to grow so hard and pointed whenever I touched them. And her legs! They were long and lean, but her thighs at the same time were right and full. And the way the skin just kind of let go so that her tuft of blonde cunt hair could flourish out ... she was incredibly perfect.
But we had been with each other now for seventeen years, neither of us had ever had an affair, we were always satisfied with each other. She always used to say that I had the best cock in the world, and whenever she had the chance, she would fondle me, make me hard, and either blow me or jack me off. She was always kind of a devil that way, but I really dug every minute of it.
With all of that, though, we got bored. I mean, our daughter, Ellen, was starting to go out with boys and we were left alone on Saturday nights watching television. Even the sexual excitement between us began to fade. That was when I decided to try and do something about our situation, you know, instigate some kind of feeling between us again.
One Saturday night, while June was watching TV I brought in our film projector. I wound the reels, and she thought we were going to watch home movies. She turned off the television, still bored with the idea of watching again our trip to New York, and sat down.
When that movie started, I thought she would faint! Right there on the screen was a big, tall guy undressing a small girl. The girl was small but really she must have been over twenty, she only looked small because of her tiny breasts and the small tuft of pubic hair. When the chick was finally undressed, she moved to the guy, took out his dick, and began blowing him. June was watching intently, and I realized that at that moment the fires of our life were going to be rekindled.
"This is wild, Bill, where did you get them?"
"Doesn't matter, June, just relax and enjoy it."
But it was getting her horny and I was getting even worse. My balls were aching and my cock was stuck somewhere up inside my pants, just aching to leap out and dive into June's sweet and soft pussy.
I moved across the room and took my seat next to my wife. Immediately, she placed her hand on my groin and began moving my prick around. She was acting strangely, almost nonchalant, and that turned me on even more. Then she pulled down my zipper, reached into my pants and pulled out the hard rod. She just sat there, watching the movie and rubbing my prick.
Then I took her sweater and pulled it up over her head. Ever since the movement, she had taken to wearing nothing under her clothes, and with the kind of body she had, it always made her look twice as sexy.
When she was naked from the waist up, I began playing with her tits. They were hard as ever, those fine nipples of hers arching towards the ceiling and kind of pulsating every time I touched them!
On the screen, the guy and girl were doing a '69' job, and doing it very well. The chick was really fine looking, and it seemed kicky at the time to be looking at such a young, innocent body like that. It was a good film and it certainly was getting June and myself where we wanted to go.
After the film had ended, and the guy had come all over the chick's face, June and I were both naked. I had her on the couch with her legs spread. Kneeling on the floor between them, I was eating her out. She held onto my head, pushing me into her and crying for more. But I felt kind of wild that night and wanted to drive her crazy before I plugged her with my cock.
"Please ... Bill, put it inside! Hurry, Bill, prick me ... fuck me!! ! " She was better than she had been in months. We were really getting it on, and I wanted to prolong the moment for as long as I could.
Finally, I took my tongue away from her warm, throbbing cunt and spread her out on the couch. She was writhing, rubbing her thighs together and licking her lips with anticipation. I hovered over her for a few seconds, just kind of watching. this beautiful body beneath me-so much in heat and so much in demand of my prick. Then, with a sudden plunge, I dove into the depths of her.
June screamed as I pushed my prick deep inside her. She was warm and moist, and I could feel the walls of her vagina clutch at the bulk of my prick. I began working her on, riding her high and getting her clit. This was the way we had always made love until I had bought her that vibrator. After that, she would tell me that she could get better orgasms from that blasted fucking thing than from me! But tonight, after all of that, I was riding high again and there was no doubt in either of our minds that good, strong sex was still the best and only way to go!
I could feel the vibrations ripple through her cunt. They were like gentle fingers stroking my prick, like those girls who really know how to jack you off when they kind of touch real light and feathery, making the same feeling as those when you're inside and she comes.
I rode her orgasm, then shot my load. I hadn't even noticed that she had stuck her finger up my ass until I came. Then, at the moment of my strongest shot, she yanked her finger out. It was that good ol' time religion all over again. June and I had found ourselves kind of being reborn, and the next few weeks would find us experimenting with all kinds of gadgets, cameras and accessories until we decided to do the real experiment-the one that involved other people.
Our first venture into this new kind of sex thing was through an ad we found in the underground newspapers. The couple said they were young, well-endowed and wanted the friendship and companionship of a middle-aged couple at their mountain home. I called the guy, his name was Kurt, and we made arrangements to meet that weekend at his place.
June and I were kind of nervous as we drove up the tricky road to his place. It was a huge, log cabin-type place but with every modern convenience. There was an indoor-outdoor swimming pool and a patio with a view of half the nation. The kid must have been born rich because he didn't look a day over thirty. His wife, who, if things went according to plan I would be fucking, was a real little beauty.
We sat around the living room for an hour and talked. June had worn a see-through blouse and hip-hugger pants. Her body, especially her breasts, was completely ascertainable to anyone who wanted a good look. She looked sexy as hell.
But Kurt's wife, whose name was Mary, also looked pretty good. She was wearing one of those knit bikinis, and I could see the faint pinkness of her nipple and the shaded area of her cunt beneath. Her body was kind of small and delicate, but she certainly had all the right parts in all the right places.
"The meaning of what we do here," explained Kurt, never taking his eyes away from June's tits, "is to exchange roles. I mean, you people are mid-aged and were born the generation before us. We are young, and basically shouldn't even be communicating with you. So, to break down those rules and open the lines of communication, Mary and I kind of like to get into these kinds of things."
We all thought that was a pretty good idea, but for some reason, no one knew how to go about getting the thing started. Finally, Kurt suggested we take some photographs.
He brought out a small polaroid camera and began shooting pictures of June, who was sitting alone on the couch. June was posing very demurely, and looked completely sexy. I think Mary got a little jealous, so she took off her bikini top and walked in front of June to pose.
I asked Kurt for the camera so that I could snap some of all three of them. Kurt walked between Mary and June, pulled his wife down next to him on the couch, and rested his hand naturally on my wife's tit.
"How's this?" he asked with a huge grin.
"Just fine ... " June replied by resting her hand on his lap and showing a look of genuine astonishment at what lay buried underneath. Meanwhile, Mary had stripped her panties off and was stark naked, and quite sexy in her own delicate way. I snapped the picture, waited the minute and showed everyone. We laughed.
Then I took another picture. This time, June had her hand on Kurt's prick. He was hard and huge, and she seemed to dig him. Then both girls put their hands on his cock, like a baseball bat and smiled into the camera. I snapped again and again until we finally ran out of film.
The last picture showed June with Kurt's dick snugly in her mouth. She was looking sideways into the camera, and there was a strange look there that I had never seen before. It was the kind of expression that dared anyone to make something out of what she was doing ... kind of like a little girl who steals cookies then sits down in front of her mother and eats them to show her she's not afraid of authority. That was the strange, vague feeling I had when I gazed at the snapshot. Meanwhile, Kurt Mary and June had stripped naked and were each doing funny dives into the swimming pool.
The water was warm and pleasant, almost more like a bath than a swimming pool. Kurt and June were entangled in each other's arms when I felt something crawling up my legs.
Mary was under the water, pulling herself up towards my prick. When she finally reached it, she took it into her mouth and began sucking on me. Her tongue played like crazy into the hole, and she really knew her business.
I pulled her up to me and wrapped my arms around her. She threw up both her legs and hoisted herself up so that her wide-open cunt would be just at the place where my cock stood. Then, as we kissed each other, probing out mouths with our tongues, she dropped herself onto my prick.
It was a strange feeling because she was not yet really turned on, and she felt kind of slithery and scaly inside because of the water in the pool. It wasn't unpleasant, but then again, it wasn't like the warm, juicy cunt of my wife. I wondered if June's cunt was still warm and juicy, or if it felt like Mary's.
We played around in the pool for another couple of hours and then June and I left. On the way home, we talked about the event, and we both agreed that the next time we went there would have to be more people. Neither of us wanted, at that time, to fall in love or get involved with anyone else and we both agreed that with more people around it would be easier to keep this from happening.
It didn't take long for Kurt and Mary to answer our plea. The next week they called and invited us to their annual 'ball'. I asked him how many people would be attending, and he told me there would be between one and two hundred people. This sounded good enough for us, so we made plans to attend. The one stipulation, though, was that we come in costume. That made it even better than ever for both of us and our fears were all but eliminated.
The night of the party arrived, and I went as a Roman, wearing a sheet around me with nothing on underneath. June dressed as a belly dancer, but underneath those long, sheer veils she was naked. You could see just enough to really stimulate the imagination and tell that she was naked.
When we arrived on the mountaintop again, there were cars parked all over the place. Inside, music was blaring and people were laughing. It was going to be some party.
Kurt and Mary both greeted us at the front door. He wore a mask with a Lone Ranger hat and a gun hanging loosely over his prick. When he walked, you could see his dong swinging from side to side beneath that gun. Mary was wearing underwear. It was not the normal kind though, but the kind with holes in all the wrong, or actually right, places. Her nipples were exposed from the bra and her cunt was plainly visible in the hole in her crotch. It was exciting looking at her because of the emphasis on her parts, she looked even more inviting than the first time I had seen her.
Inside the house, there were at least a hundred people milling around in various stages of undress. Everyone had a mask on, and I suppose the only way you could have recognized anyone at all was if you had some kind of sex with them at some former time. There were more cocks, breasts, balls, cunts, asses and bellies than I had ever seen in one place at the same time.
As I wandered throughout the crowd, without June because she had been dragged off into the 'pit,' or the place where mattresses had been put down for those wishing to get something on, I was patted and molested by everyone. One girl, no more than seventeen, came up to me wearing nothing at all but a Victorian broach around her neck. It was really a very funny costume because she had her hair done as though she were some English schoolmaster's wife. But beneath her neck, there was not one stitch of clothing. She was completely naked and quite sexy.
"What's underneath the toga?" she asked, demurely placing her hand on her pink nipple and smiling.
"I'd be glad to show you."
"It probably is the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire, right?" She laughed at her own joke, then peeled apart the folds of my sheet. She examined my cock, then held it in her hands and watched as it grew into one of the largest hard-ons I had ever had.
"This is definitely the rise!" Then she threw her arms around me, looking into my eyes with her green eyes and asked me if I wanted to dance. We started moving around the floor, holding each other close and grinding our pelvises against one another.
The tip of my cock rode against her belly. She was warm and light, almost like a drifting perfume that once one catches its scent one is totally captivated.
As I danced with her, holding her delicate naked body in my arm, she reached down between us and held my prick. Then, she slid it up between her legs, throwing one of them around behind my back. I was kind of shook, and looked around to see if anyone else was watching, but they were all too busy doing their own bit of waltzing to pay any attention to us.
"You feel very nice ... very nice ... " She was quiet, matter-of-fact and surely highly experienced. There was something about the way in which she performed that indicated that she had, indeed, been around.
And there we stood, in the center of one hundred people, fucking away. It was a slow, almost painful fuck because we had to keep our balance. Our movements were just minute, but that seemed to make them even the more powerful. I was pretty far up inside her, and she had this way of making her vagina get smaller then larger, as though she were beating off on my prick. Finally, her pretty green eyes clouded over and she began to swoon. I held her up as she came and I spurted into her sweet, almost unreal cunt.
When her cunt had finally stopped pulsating and vibrating, she came back to Earth and smiled.
"That was very good, you're a highly trained fucker!"
I told her that I had a beautiful wife who liked to screw and she told me that that was wonderful. Then, as though I helped her pick up a dropped grocery bag, she thanked me and said 'goodbye.' As her naked little ass shimmied away into the mass of people, I realized how easy I could get hung up on her if I saw her again. But I also realized how impossible the whole thing would be ... she was a professional 'banger,' a chick who made a scientific, professional study of sex but never got involved with those she made it with. I shrugged my shoulders, straightened my toga, and walked back into the party to wait for the midnight hour when everyone took off their masks, and what little remained of their clothing.
By the time twelve rolled around,-everybody was pretty well smashed. Chicks were jacking off guys in the middle of the room, blowing them and having themselves eaten out by anyone who happened to pass by. It was a full-fledged orgy, and I was glad I was there. I hadn't seen June since our arrival, however, and that worried me ... but not enough to take anything away from the good time I was having.
At fifteen minutes to midnight, Kurt stood up on the piano and told everyone to take a partner for the unveiling. Standing next to me was this very pretty little chick who could have not been more than eighteen. Her hair was blonde like June's, but her body instead of being voluptuous was thin and very sexy. She was wearing a full-face mask, but on her body she had only patches of a clear, plastic wrap which had obviously been torn away by some pretty hungry cats.
"Be my partner?" she asked with a voice that was barely audible above the noise and confusion.
"I would be delighted!" I replied, taking her neat little body into my arms. She pressed tightly up against me as we began dancing. Her breasts were fuller than they first appeared, and the softness between her thighs indicated the presence of a woman and not a little girl. She was grinding hard, and I was soon erect with another huge erection.
"You're very big, aren't you?" Her voice sounded timid, as though she was afraid that later on I would split her apart.
"Oh no, honey, just a regular guy..." I was trying to be modest, but my cock had made its way out between the folds of my toga. The tip was rubbing against her warm belly and she responded to this by pushing , even harder against me.
There was something very strange and exciting about this girl, and I wondered if I could bear to wait until twelve to take her. Her body was warm, and what was the best thing about her was the fact that seemed to really want to fuck. I mean, desire was flowing out of her every pore, spilling from her eyes and reflected in her touch. I was throbbing and aching, wanting so desperately to dump my stinging rod deep into her smooth, young cunt.
"All right everybody, take off everything!! ! "
The room exploded as people tore at their clothes, tore at their masks and tore at each other. Bodies began spilling to the floor, and I caught a glimpse of June going down beneath some big, fat man with a soft pecker. That made me feel good ... at least she wasn't getting anything better than I could give her from some super-stud.
Then I turned to my little cunt and undid the mask from behind. I dropped the black material across her breasts, following it down with my mouth, kissing her nipples and then kissing her crack. When I stood up, she had taken my mask off and we both faced each other.
There are times when one feels as though the entire world is falling from beneath ones' feet. This was the most intense experience of this phenomenon I had ever had. Standing there in the nude, her blue eyes downcast trying to avoid my throbbing cock, was Eileen, my daughter.
"Daddy..." she whispered, suddenly trying to cover her pubic hair.
"What are you doing here?" It was a stupid reaction to start yelling at her as though she had just returned with her clothing ripped from a 'heavy' date. She turned up towards me, looked me in the eye with that same kind of look that her mother had had during the photo session and grinned.
"What am I doing here? You might ask yourself the same damned question!! ! " Her voice was a little loud, and I put my hand over her mouth to make her be quiet.
I realized that she had an excellent point, though, and there was no denying that both of us had been caught with 'our pants down'.
"Well," I asked, trying to joke but still feeling turned on by her nakedness and also by the new development, "what'll we do now?'-'
Eileen looked around, the people were fucking, sucking and blowing everything and everyone in sight. One older woman was even beating herself off on a lamp, sliding her wickedly wet cunt up and down the base. Finally, my daughter turned back towards me, smiled that funny smile again, and reached down to hold my prick.
"Like I said before, daddy, you are big ... "
Her head was bobbing up and down at my groin before I could do anything else. Her thin, warm mouth was around my flesh, sucking and pulling on the skin and really trying to pull me off. The little girl was certainly a wild one.
I pulled her up from my cock and we kissed. It was a warm, smooth kiss, with our tongues exploring deliciously each other's mouth. She was quite a doll, and really reminded me of her mother when her mother was younger.
We found an open space in the corner of the room. Eileen lay down on her back and spread her legs. The tuft of golden hair between them opened and I could see her finely tuned, pink lips throbbing and waiting to spread for my entrance. She was practically new, and didn't have the sag that June did on her cunt. I was more excited than I had ever been before, and more aware of every little touch and sensation that shot through my body.
"Daddy," she moaned, now pulling her moist lips apart so I could see even better, "come fuck your little girl ... "
I hovered over her for a second, watching her close her eyes and bite the tip of her tongue which kind of darted out between her lips. She was waiting, waiting in the edge to be invaded from the most heinous of all sources-her own father.
Yet, with everything that had happened, and with the way the party was, I was glad it was me who was fucking Eileen. It would have been awful I guess, to watch someone else dive into that sweet little cunt of hers. A strange thought upon entering your own daughter, but now that I think about it, it seems kind of honest.
When I finally slid my cock into her vagina, Eileen turned into a total fucking machine. She clawed at my back as we began riding the roller coaster together, thrashing and pulling at one another, trying to melt our bodies together in one massive pattern of energy. My balls were slapping loudly against her ass, and she had her legs wrapped high on my back. We threw against each other with more force than I had ever experienced in my entire life-like this was the fuck we had both been waiting for all of our lives and after it was over there would be nothing.
Eileen and I came together in better harmony than I had ever come with any other woman, including June. It was every click, every spasm, every pulsation that worked together to build and build. Each new feeling of our orgasm added onto another until we were riding a crescendo of utter ecstasy. It wasn't until the cries and moans coming from both of us died down that we realized that there was a huge crowd watching us, chanting with us and experiencing our orgasm with us.
"The best fuck of the night!"
"Incredible ... fantastic ... excellent!"
"They were made for each other!! ! "
The crowd, naked and sweaty, encircled us as we lay in each others' arms on the floor. I never wanted to annihilate anyone before then. If there could have been some way of making them all disappear, leaving just my little girl and myself, I would have given anything . ...
Then I saw June. She was standing next to the same fat man who had thrown her to the floor earlier. The expression on her face was incredible. It was one of complete and absolute understanding and comprehension. She understood at that moment something which I did not. She knew that her daughter had succeeded in pleasing her man better than she herself had ever been capable of doing. It was the end, at that moment, of June's sexual confidence-at least when she was with me.
I left my family after that night. I knew that Eileen and I could never have what we had had that night. And, even if it were possible to achieve again, I wasn't sure if I could do it. The moral stigma of what I had done began engulfing me in a dream of social ostracism and condemnation. I began to see myself as a complete and absolute pervert.
The two years I spent before seeing the psychiatrist were years of hell. But once I began talking with the Doctor, I began to understand what had happened. I had actually reverted back to my youth on that night, and my little girl had actually replaced June as the love object during that time.
I have told my wife of this, and she is beginning to understand, and even to realize just how much she meant to me. I think because of that, things will work out.
SUMMARY
Bill S., in fact, was the victim of a number of rather uncommon circumstances. Within the framework of these, his innermost drives and desires were released, creating because of the coincidence, the situation into which he fell.
Society has long been the victim of much sexual repression. Because of this state of affairs, whenever efforts are made to break from within the bonds of this repression, many people tend to lose their bearings. In June and Bill's case we see a prime example of this phenomenon.
The point which should be considered in this case is whether the actual happening of the sexual intimacy between Bill and his daughter was better, or worse, for both of them. In other words, if the entire thing had never happened, would Bill have worn his desire for his daughter underneath his own personality, creating a bad situation for everyone?
Many men, upon reaching middle-age, leave their wives and seek the companionship of girls half their age. A number of theories attempt to explain this behavior in that the man is actually seeking the love of his daughter and that her love will make his own self-image one of youth. Thus, in Bill's case, it is interesting that even though those drives were there, he had in reality accomplished what so many men only subconsciously dream of.
Whether or not the reality of what happened will actually benefit anyone only remains to be seen. One point, however, which could have harmed Bill in a very bad way, was the circumstances under which this fate befell him.
In sexual matters, degrees in age sometimes mean very little. At the party, and at other functions of that kind, Bill and June found themselves relating, having sexual intercourse with, and enjoying the company of people half their age. The strange and highly unlikely appearance of their own daughter at this function cannot condemn the function, or Bill and June's participation in the function.
It is with this perspective that self-blame and self-hatred will cease to exist within Bill and be replaced by understanding and insight into his, and humanities' nature.
CHAPTER FIVE
Lisa M. is twenty-six years old. Lovely and feminine, she has just relieved herself of intense emotional feelings regarding her childhood.
As a child, Lisa's father had continually practiced sex with her. The first time was when she was six, and he continued to "go after her" until she left home when she was fifteen. Her life, through those years, consisted of hardships, arguments and poverty. The family, two brothers and herself, were locked together in a very small apartment. The father was a tyrant and tried to control every move. He soon came to realize that the brothers were threatening his hold on his daughter and sent them off to work. It was this time that Lisa herself had to leave.
Now married and happy, Lisa was able to describe those years and how they affected her sexual behavior later on. She was at first reluctant to discuss what had happened and why, but as the interview progressed, she began to realize the important cathartic effect it would have on her.
Our home life was very bad. There was always a lack of money and much bitterness because of that. Dad would blame Mom and Mom would blame Dad. Constantly, there was fighting and arguing over whose fault it was.
My brothers and I grew pretty close because of that, I suppose. They were both older than myself and kind of took care of me during those years. I suppose that it was really them who raised me as a child, and not my parents.
The first sexual experience I had was when I was six years old. Dad had just been laid off his job and was very bitter about everything. He drank a lot then, and would spend the days drinking and just kind of wandering around the house with a strange look in his eyes. Then one day I was sick and it all began.
I was laying in bed and Dad and I were the only ones in the house. I was wearing this short nightie and reading when he walked into the room. He stood at the doorway for a long time, not speaking but just staring at me. Then he asked me if there was anything I wanted. I told him that I wanted a glass of water. But he unzipped his pants and pulled out his organ.
"Don't you want this?" He asked, holding his penis in his hand and making it grow hard.
I was very frightened and asked him to please leave. Instead of doing that, he pulled his pants down over his buttocks and walked across the room towards the bed. He stood above me, with his balls and prick right over my head and laughed.
"It's big, isn't it? It'll tear you apart, little girl, literally tear you apart!"
I began to cry but that didn't stop him. He pulled the covers back and lifted up my nightdress over my head. I was naked underneath. He put his mouth to my parts and began licking my vagina.
"Someday" He said, laying himself down on the bed next to me, "when you're big, you'll have hair there and plenty of room for pricks."
He moved next to me and began rubbing his prick against .my belly. I was shaking I was so scared but there was nothing I could do. Then he brought my hand down and made me put it on his penis. I remember how hard and warm and sticky it was. It disgusted me, the way it lay there being so snake-like.
"That's it, just rub it a little, get the feel of it 'cause you're going to know it much better!" He laughed as he forced my hand up between his legs and made me grab his balls.
I tried to pull away but he forced me to stay. Soon, I found myself stroking the length of his prick until finally he came with a shudder. The white stuff squirted out all over my belly, and I felt sick. But he just laughed and then got real angry and stood above me with his belt off.
"You ;say anything about this to your mother and I'll beat the shit out of you!"
He meant it, too, and I was scared out of my mind. There was nothing I could do, and that threat on his part ruined any plans I would ever have of telling anybody what he had done. Then, just as he was leaving, he stopped, turned around and smiled.
"Lesson number two will be tomorrow, baby, I'll teach you everything you need to know to make me happy..."
And then he walked out of the room.
From that day on I would never stay home if I was sick or something. I would make every excuse to stay out of the house until either my brothers or my mother was home. My-dad and I were playing a kind of cat and mouse game, and he knew I was trying to avoid him. It scared me to think what he would do to me the next time because of all the lengths I gone to avoid him.
About three months after that episode, I found myself alone in the house with him again. This time, there was no one around to stop him. It was like for all that time he was saving himself for the chance to get to me once we were alone again. It was a horrible feeling and I knew there would be trouble.
I tried to run from the house, but he stopped me at the front door.
"Don't you want to play with daddy's prick, baby?"
He was leering and drunk. I backed away, but he came after me, undoing his pants and pulling out his penis. When he was hard, he pulled me up against him and made me touch him again. But this time, he had something else in mind.
"Put your sweet little mouth on it ... it won't bite!"
He forced my head down there and opened my mouth. Then , he put his prick inside and began moving back and forth like he was fucking a woman's vagina. He stuffed his huge thing far down my throat and I thought I would choke, but each time he would slide it back out again and let me breath. I tried to get out somehow, even thought of biting him on his prick, but knew if I tried anything like that I would be dead. So, I just held on while he pumped his ugly prick inside my mouth.
"I'm coming darlin', goin' to shoot a wad of stuff inside your virgin mouth ... yes-sir!! ! "
And then he came. The stuff seemed to flood from nowhere in a torrent. I tried spitting it out because I was getting pretty nauseous and about ready to throw up on myself. But there was nothing I could do, the stuff was coming so fast. Finally, when he had dumped all his shit into my mouth, he pulled his cock out and stuffed it back inside his pants. He was grinning and leering like some kind of a madman. At that point, I think I really began to hate him. That hatred has never stopped and I'm sure it never will.
Things went along like that for six years. I mean, he never made me do more than jack him off or take his prick into my mouth. Meanwhile, he sent my older brothers off to work and kept Mom working two jobs to support us. He got drunker and older and didn't do a fucking thing throughout all those years except get his rocks off with me.
When I was finally thirteen, I began to realize that I was becoming a woman. I mean, at that time my breasts were already pretty well-developed and there was hair on my cunt. I wasn't bad looking, but took no pains to make myself pretty because the last thing I wanted was sex with anyone. Good 'ol dad had pretty well ruined that for me already.
At that time I used to go to the beach a lot to be alone. It was the only time I could get off by myself and I used to go there anytime I could. On this day it was cloudy and cold, and the beach appeared to be deserted except for me. Then, way far down the sand, I noticed the figure of a man coming towards me.
His name was Sam. He was in his thirties, hunched over and kind of pathetic. But he was nice to me, gave me a few sea-shells and lent me his huge overcoat to wear in the cold. We got to talking about this and that, and finally wound up discussing sex.
"Do you ever masturbate?" His question was simple and clear, but it really shocked me. I had heard some of the girls at school talking about it, but I really didn't know what it was.
"I'll teach you how, if you want to ... " He smiled at me. I didn't know what he wanted and figured that probably he wanted to fuck me. But the idea that eventually my own father would get around to fucking me was insistent at that time and I figured that if this guy did before my own father then I could tell my father that and make him angry. It was a kind of insane way of reasoning about things like, but at that time, it was the only way for me.
Sam told me to get undressed so I would have easier access to my own 'private parts'. I was kind of embarrassed when I was finally naked, but he was still very friendly and very appreciative of my body.
"You're very beautiful ... quite lovely..." He kept repeating that while he looked me over. Finally, he told me to lay down on the sand and spread my legs. I threw myself backwards and spread my legs. He came up between them and took one of my hands.
"Now" He said, holding my hand, "you take your hand like this and put it here and start rubbing easily back and forth until you feel yourself getting there. Then, when you do, you put a few fingers inside yourself and come that way. You see, when you find yourself a boyfriend in years from now, he'll be able to make you come much easier."
I did what I was told. He watched me while I rubbed my clit. I tried to keep from getting turned on because I was still embarrassed about the whole thing. But there were some pretty wild things happening inside, and the more and the harder I rubbed myself there, the greater was the pleasure.
When I was finally breathing very hard, Sam told me to stick my fingers inside my vagina. I spread myself open and inserted my fingers up inside. They felt good there, and I was surprised just how wet I was. I liked the feeling of having something inside, but kept reverting back to images of my fathers' huge, swollen prick as the thing inside me. That was very disappointing and by the time I was finished, that image seemed to stay in my mind. I think now that was why when I had finished I told Sam that I thought the whole thing was really disgusting. I threw his overcoat in his face, told him to 'go to hell', and ran off down the beach crying.
I realized now that there was something a little wrong with Sam. But at that time, with me either being forced to jack my father off or blow him, Sam seemed like the most nearly normal person I had met in my whole life. And what he had taught me was something which became more and more valuable because it was something I could do myself. But I hated my father even more because of Sam, because the image of his prick had ruined that day on the beach when Sam was teaching me how to satisfy myself.
Then it finally happened. I knew it would come eventually because my father had been looking at me in strange ways for some time. He knew I was turning into a woman, and even though I tried to make myself look ugly, to ward him off in that way, he still knew there were breasts and a woman's vagina beneath my clothing.
It was a dark afternoon during the winter. I was in the shower and thought he was gone. That night, I was going to a sports night at my school and was looking forward to spending the night out of the house.
I heard the bathroom door open and saw the image of him walking towards the tub through the shower curtain.
"Well, well, who's naked in the shower?"
He was stoned out of his mind, really drunk like I had never seen him. His voice was cracking like there was some kind of terrible tension in it that he couldn't control. I backed up against the wall of the shower, and pulled a towel across as much of my body as I could.
He ripped open the curtain and leered inside at me.
"Ah, the naked little cunt! You've blown me, beat me off and watched me come ... now, it's your turn, little bitch!"
He grabbed the towel away from me and threw it to the ground. For the first time, I noticed that he was naked and erect. His penis looked bigger and harder than I had ever seen it. I begged him to go away, to leave me alone for once in his life, but he just laughed.
"You're my little piece of ass in residence, don't you know that?" And he laughed again as he stepped into the shower with me. He grabbed me and made me rub up against him. His prick felt slimy and huge against my stomach, and I wanted to hit him.
He brought his hand up between my legs and rested it at the entrance to my vagina.
"Ah, feels moist and soft ... all ready for daddy, is it?"
Then he peeled apart my lips and rammed his finger up inside. Even though I had been doing that to myself for some time, it hurt like hell. I started to scream but he covered my mouth with his hand and gagged me into silence.
He kept fingering me with one hand and holding the other over my mouth. I almost fainted because I couldn't breathe correctly, but that didn't seem to concern him at all.
Then he withdrew his hand from my cunt and went around my back. He spread the cheeks of my ass and placed his finger in my hole. The pain was terrific, but he still had me gagged and there was no way I could scream for help. Anyway, there was no help around ... no one.
"All right, enough of this shit ... it's time for the real thing!"
He pulled me from the shower and dragged me into the bedroom. He hit me once and knocked me down onto the bed. He stood above me, holding his prick in his hand and kind of waving it at me like it was some kind of flag or something.
"I'm going to ram you with this. Every girl needs it once, and your time has finally come. Finally come."
I was dizzy as I watched him lower himself down on top. He threw my legs apart and guided his prick between them. I felt the hot, burning skin of his cock as it spread the lips and he began pushing it inside. Each time he lunged a little further, I felt as though I had split more. It was like my entire insides were being torn apart by his burning steel.
"Ah, sweet cunt ... never ... been ... touched ... before...! ! ! "
He was pumping into me. I just lay there, not moving or responding at all. It was as though for the first time I was willing myself dead around my vagina. I seemed to have cut off all feeling there, letting him do what he wanted but making sure I did not feel his huge, throbbing presence.
I felt him come. He was all wet when he pulled himself out. I ran into the bathroom and washed myself off, then I threw up and washed again. I must have spent two hours in that bathroom trying to get clean, trying to wash the dirt off of me that he had put there. But there was no way that could have been accomplished with water. I didn't know it then, but it would take much, much more to ever get me wholly clean.
I decided that even though I had been raped I would go the sports night at school. There was no way I could stay around the house with him there, and the activity at school was a perfect reason for leaving. He couldn't stop me because that would draw suspicion towards him-and that was the last thing that old fucker wanted.
The school was filled with happy kids, all of them about my age. As I walked through the gym, looking at the pretty, clean faces and smiling people, I became furious. They were not like me. I would never be like them and I knew it. I wanted to tear down everything around there and destroy the whole thing. I had to do something because I felt myself to be inferior to everyone.
As the night wore on, there was a boy who kept after me to dance. Finally, I said I would.
He led me out onto the floor and we began dancing. He wanted to dance close at first, but I pushed him away. Then, a strange thing happened. I realized suddenly that I was a woman, and a woman who had fucked and fucked again. No one else here in that place could have made such a statement. I was different, so I figured I could at least play the part.
I pulled this guy real close to me. Then I put my hand on his ass and played with his cheeks. I could feel him growing hard between us, so I thrust my stomach up against his groin and ground it in.
"Hey" he groaned, getting really hot, "you really get it on, don't you?"
"I'm just a red-hot mamma, sonny, a fucker!" I guess the word kind of shocked him because he pulled away. But then I pulled him back again.
During the dance, I let my hand slide once or twice down between our bodies so that it grazed his hard cock as it went by. Each time I did this, I could feel him lurch and shudder a little.
"You're getting pretty hot down there ... "
"You notice a lot" he replied, almost afraid of me.
"Well" I replied, bringing my hand up between his legs and cupping his balls, "who could help but to notice with the huge meat you've got!"
He was getting pretty uptight. I mean, he really didn't know what to make of me. He had always thought of me as some innocent little girl and here I was feeling him up and beating him off right there on the dance floor! I was really living up to my image of myself that night.
"Let's go outside, David, I want to see you."
He led me through the doors, I noticed a few of the guys were watching us like hawks. They had caught what was happening out there on the floor, and they were making notes on me so maybe they could get in on some of the action later. I was also making notes, figuring out in which order I would take them. All of them.
We walked across the field and went underneath the bleachers. I didn't even let him kiss me, but went to work unhooking his belt and dropping his pants. He kind of stood there in total amazement, not able to say a word.
I pulled his prick out from his shorts and began giving him one hell of a blow job. First, I just blew warm air around the head. Then, I reached underneath and took his balls and rubbed them together. I followed the line between them up his cock and touched his head. Then I drove my tongue into his hole and worked that open. After listening to him almost choke on his own excitement, I took his entire length into my mouth and began sucking him out.
He held onto the back of my head. I sucked and licked at his prick until finally he shot his load into my mouth. It was a heavy one, the guy was obviously pretty horny. I swallowed everything he had and then licked his cock and balls dry.
"God" he said, trying to hold me as though I were his girlfriend or something, "that was fantastic!"
"You're nicely built ... I liked sucking your dick."
"Take off your clothes, Lisa, please?"
I thought about it for a minute. Then I decided that I was beginning to enjoy my new role, my new self-image. I knew I would have to string it out a little if it was going to last.
"Maybe some other time, David, 'cause you know I'd really like to feel that big piece of meat you have there inside my warm cunt."
"Then why not now, for Christsakes!! ? ? "
"Oh, just because..." And I turned away and left him standing there underneath those dark bleachers wondering about me. But I knew I had him along with every other guy at that school if I so desired. As I walked back into the gym, I even began wondering about the teachers ... I thought that maybe that would be kind of fun.
When David came back into the gym, I knew I had everybody there. It was a good feeling, like a kind of purge because they all knew I was evil and dirty and would treat me that way. I guess now that seems kind of childish, but thats the way I was thinking about it then.
After the function was over, I started walking home. This guy who I had seen there walked up along side of me and fell into step. It was already beginning, and I was happy because at least I didn't have to go home.
"Want to go to a great party?"
"I'm not sure ... I mean, I don't even know you ... do I?"
He looked at me, smiling and really digging on what he knew I would give him.
"We could get better acquainted, couldn't we?"
I told him that I didn't know about that. I was playing coy with him and wanted to get as much out of him as I could. As we walked on, he kept after me about going to the party, and really started to beg. Those guys in my school were really horny, and they would have done practically anything to get a piece of ass. Ic made me feel powerful knowing that I controlled the immediate happiness of him, and probably of all the others who thought they would be getting something from me.
"Why don't we get to know each other better before we go, then I'll go to the party with you."
I stopped on the sidewalk, took his head and kissed him hard on the mouth. I opened my lips and threw my tongue inside his mouth and explored him there. It was like with each guy I was teaching them the tricks, teaching them things I had been doing since I was six years old.
We kissed there long and hard. It was apparent that this was the farthest he had ever gone with a girl. He really didn't know what to do after the kiss, although I'm sure he had a pretty good idea.
"Aren't you going to feel me?" I asked, lifting my sweater above my bra and unsnapping the back strap. He stood there and stared at my nude breasts. The evening breeze was making the nipples hard and they were beginning to ache.
"Here, just put your hand on them..." I took his hand and lifted it to my tit. He was shaking and there was sweat pouring from every gland. He stroked my nipples, and than began to pinch and caress it.
"Ahhh..." I moaned, "that feels so nice. Put your mouth there."
He put his lips on me and began sucking hard on my tit. I pulled him tightly against my chest, letting him work and bite at those aching buds of mine. Then, I reached underneath him and grabbed his nuts. His dick was hard as a rock and pretty large. I found the stem and began stroking him underneath his jeans. Then, I slid my hand down the front of his pants and found his hot, throbbing shaft all curled up inside like it was a trapped snake ready to leap out at the world.
"Oh, God," I cried, jacking him off inside his pants, "you're so big and hot ... so big!! ! "
He was getting into the whole thing with much more enthusiasm now. His hand was roaming around my ass underneath my panties. He would follow the crack up and down, then try to squeeze his way underneath to my cunt. But my tight pants made that play almost impossible.
All of this time we were standing outside on the sidewalk. I suddenly realized this and pulled away from him.
"Let's go into the bushes ... hurry!"
We found a spot underneath a large bush. He tried to kiss me again, but I backed away.
"Just relax and let me show you something..."
I lifted my sweater over my head, then ripped off my bra. It was becoming like a dream, there was a certain kind of exultation I felt at tearing at my clothing. Somehow, and in some way, I was freeing myself from those bonds which my father had put around me. I was becoming a free person again, someone who had a life of their own.
When I was naked from the waist up, he tried to come at me again. I held him off while I tore at my pants, then actually ripped my panties away from my skin. I was naked, rubbing my fur and smiling at him.
"Do you like me?"
"Yes ... yes!! ! "
"Let me see what you've got there inside your pants."
He ripped at his clothes and within seconds was naked. His erect prick stood out hard and proud against the moonlight. I thought about what a shame it was that I had grown up the way I had. I thought about how I would have enjoyed having a real boyfriend and discovering all those things together, for the first time. But that was never to be, and the bitterness once again swept over me. I wanted out, somehow, and I wanted it fast.
"Fuck me, baby, fuck me with everything you've got!! ! "
I threw myself back on the grass and spread myself. He came down on me and drove his prick inside. He came almost immediately, and didn't even give me a chance to develop a sweat.
"I'm sorry." He muttered.
"That's okay ... first time?"
"Uh huh."
I looked at him, thought once again how nice it would have been had I been able to have a boyfriend, and then asked him about the party. He was shocked that I wanted to go but I demanded that we did.
There were about fifteen kids at the party. Ten boys and five girls. The house was large and the people were well-to-do. Underneath the house was a basement that was used as a recreation room. I went down there alone and took off my clothes. I sat by myself on the pool table, waiting for someone to come in.
This guy walked in about five minutes later. He saw me sitting there naked and almost ran back out of the room.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Sitting naked on the pool table ... " Then I rolled on my back, planted my legs on the edges, and let my knees fall apart. He was looking directly into my vagina, that seething churning pot full of rich juices for anyone that wanted them.
"Want to fuck?"
He looked frightened and then finally ran from the room. I lay where I was, waiting as I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Suddenly, every guy in the party was standing above me, looking and staring up my cunt.
"Anybody want in?" I asked, searching their faces.
The first guy to lower his pants was a huge football player. He was actually fat but had a good-size dick. He jumped onto the table with the cheers of the others and began pumping away. The rest watched as he came quickly inside me.
Then another guy jumped on and did it.
Then another and another. Finally, everyone there had had his turn. I calmly got up, feeling a little sore and not much else, and dressed.
"Well", I said, about ready to walk out the back door, "it's been a lot of fun!"
And then I turned and walked out the door. I was never to see any of them ever again. When I got home, my father had somehow found out what I had been doing. I think that one of the girls at the party had run to my house and told my parents. They all thought I was going crazy or something.
Anyway, the next day I was sent to a reform school where I spent two years. Those years were nothing, and I was happy that at least I was away from my father. During that time, I actually made friends and began to know what it was like to really like someone. They were the best years of my life up until that time.
When I was finally sent home, as though it were some kind of a reward, I felt sick inside. I had made a lot of progress within myself and was beginning to feel kind of like a real human being and now, after all that, I had to go back into the same pit again. That was the day I ran away.
I took off and decided to never come back again. I knew I could find a cure for myself, a way of straightening out my head. So far, I guess I've been pretty lucky and have come a long way. That night, and all those sessions with my father, were things of the past. I hope they will soon be thrown back there forever.
SUMMARY
This case represents the statistical norm as far as cases where incest between the father and the daughter have been recorded. The father was a tyrannical head of the family who, because of his employment and emotional situation, was suffering from feelings of impotence and inferiority.
This psychological makeup of Lisa's father led him to use her as a receptacle for his own fears and doubts over his sexuality. By showing and exposing himself to his six-year old daughter, he was testing his own manhood with someone who could not afford to put him down. With those normal attributes of manhood gone from his life-his work, his self-esteem, etc., he had to resort to this juvenile method of proving himself.
As time went on, and Lisa's father refused to improve himself and drowned himself in drink, his sexual advances became more and more intimate and strong. This led naturally to the final incident of rape on the day of her school sports night.
Lisa herself found her only method of sexual release to be masturbation. The strange incident with the man on the beach illustrates propensity on her part to entrust anyone outside of her family and to disregard the consequences of her own actions. Masturbation for her became a retreat, a place where she could go by herself as long as the image of her father's penis was not present. It's reoccurring presence, however, destroyed that retreat for her and led her to acts of desperation.
The night of her sexual promiscuity was the example of her need to throw aside the feelings of guilt and shame which she held for herself. Her image, etc., was an attempt to go the route of self-depreciation and come out with something new. Her sudden dismissal to the reform school, however, halted any advances that kind of self-therapy would have held. It is highly unlikely that with that kind of behavior, Lisa would have helped herself at all.
After leaving her home, and going through intensive therapy with a psychiatrist, Lisa has improved vastly. Her self-image is no longer one of shame and guilt and self-hatred. She is learning to understand what happened to her, not only physically, but mentally. She will integrate that knowledge into her own behavior patterns and fully begin to understand herself as a human being.
Society condemns incest with possibly more vehemence than any other sexual act. Lisa, and people like her, must learn to reject the temptation to include themselves in this condemnation. They must remember that they are the victims, not the instigators, and that their suffering and troubles can only be cured through the intelligent, unbiased study of their individual situations.
CHAPTER SIX
Throughout the history of civilization, there have been numerous reports of strange sexual practices revolving around what might be called 'repressed incestual desires'. The 'Lolita' syndrome, or the attraction of an older man to a young girl, is a common association in the annals of the incestuous character. In attempting to discover a link between the incestuous relationship of a father and his daughter, I discovered a case history of a man who was able to realize those subconscious desires within himself through a very strange process.
Jim C. is forty-five years old. Divorced, he lives alone in a nice apartment in Los Angeles. His one child, Britt, attends a private school in the North where she is in her final year.
Jim's remarks were gathered with the use of a tape recorder and Jim's own willingness to reveal the strange processes in which he indulged himself.
My problem began when my wife left me after Britt's eleventh birthday. We had been happily married, and up till that time, had led a perfectly normal life. But I guess I did not see through the changes that were taking place inside my wife, and when she left I was terribly shocked. At the time, there seemed to be no reason or motive--just the fact that she wanted her independence.
We decided to put Britt into a private school North of San Francisco instead of one of us attempting to raise her. So, after my daughter and my wife were gone, I fell into some rather strange patterns because of living by myself.
I rented a nice apartment and stayed with my job. At first, there was the usual amount of horniness, and that was satisfied by occasional visits to massage parlors. For twenty bucks, the chick would jack me off and then let me feel her up. I admit it wasn't the greatest, but it did help. At that time, I was having difficulty meeting women, and all of my time was spent by myself. So, the massage parlors gave me at least some contact with the opposite sex.
But the boredom of the nights began closing in on me. The apartment house in which I lived faced another, entire row of buildings inhabited mainly by young people-and this fact began to show promise of helping me with my situation.
One night, just as I was preparing for bed, I happened to glance out the window. Across from me, there was a young lady with extremely long black hair. She was very pretty and very well-built. As I stood there watching, she began undressing. She seemed totally unaware that her window was open, and actually was facing directly into my apartment as she stripped.
When she was naked, she stood facing the window and touching herself. She took her nipples and squeezed them, then lowered her hands to her cunt. I couldn't see her down there because of the window sill, but I could tell what she was doing. Her face was rapt with pleasure as she rocked back and forth then pushed herself up against the window.
That night I had been naked when I first saw her. Within a second my prick was hard as a rock and I was beating myself off right along with her. When I saw that she was coming, she threw her head back and bared her teeth, I shot my load into the wall. After it was over, and she had pulled down her window shade, I knew that I was headed for a strange and unusual sex life.
But I never saw her again. I walked through the apartment trying to find which one was hers. But as I looked and searched there was no sign of her at all. I was very disappointed and began seeking other ways to satisfy my cravings, which seemed to be growing stronger every day.
I decided to try the nudist route. I signed up with a very respectable club in the mountains and paid my fees. The first day I went to the camp, I was eager with anticipation and also with the fear that I would walk in there with my dick sticking out to the sky.
The girl at the reception desk was naked. The shock of seeing her sitting there as though she were working in an office on Wilshire really turned me around. Her tits were even resting on the table top, and when she looked up at me and smiled, I noticed her shifting her legs underneath the desk. I could see her crack and vagina as plain as day, but that did not seem to bother her.
I registered and walked into the dressing room. When I was naked, I went out into the main yard where the nudists took their pleasure. It was a very strange feeling. There were old people, young people, pretty and ugly people all romping and playing in the nude. Suddenly, even though I spotted a beautiful blonde basking in the sun with her legs nicely spread, the visions of orgies in the sunshine left me. I grew very depressed and took a long walk down towards the river which ran through the camp.
As I approached the water, I heard the sound of small girls laughing and giggling. I sat down on the bank, and surprisingly enough, my prick began to rise. It was kind of an uncontrollable thing and there was nothing I could do about it.
When I finally spotted the girls, I was hard. My cock was sticking up from my stomach like a rod, gleaming in the sunlight.
There were two of them. They were about fourteen years old and they were naked. Their bodies were almost fully developed except for the breasts which were kind of small. I watched them play and giggle, then they saw me. Instead of running away, though, they walked over to where I was sitting.
"Hello," said the blonde one, staring at my prick, "you're new here?"
I muttered that I was. They were both very pretty, and they were both interested in my prick. Their eyes never left it.
"My name's Karen and this is Kim."
I nodded at both of them. They sat down next to me on the grass. As they crossed their legs and positioned themselves into the Indian sitting position, I got a clear view of their tender little pussies.
"Why are you hard like that?" Karen was indeed precocious.
"I guess I'm not used to naked bodies."
"That's cool ... could I touch you?"
This was amazing. The girl was only fourteen but smart as hell, and probably more forward about sexual matters than I was.
"If you'd like to-go ahead."
While her friend watched, Karen squatted down in front of me. Her little pussy, with its blonde hair smooth as silk, stretched out before my eyes. I suddenly realized just how attractive little girls were, and especially ones that had just arrived at puberty.
She reached out and put her finger on the tip of my prick. She seemed to be testing the strength of the skin or something because she bounced her finger up and down.
"It's really hard, isn't it?"
"It's supposed to be when it's like that."
"You mean so it can go in here easier?" She pulled apart her lips and showed me her hole. She was looking into herself and measuring the size of my prick at the same time. I wondered...
"I guess it would fit, wouldn't it?"
"It will eventually, I'm sure."
But it was obvious that she did not want to try it now. Instead, she held onto my cock and then gegan sliding her hand up and down. I leaned back and told her that it felt good and that I would come if she didn't stop. But she continued to do it.
"Men like it, don't they?"
"Yes, we do..."
She was moving gently up and down, just squatting there with her cunt wide open and her young, shiny body intent on watching my prick and how it reacted to her touch. Then, I came.
She backed away as I began spurting and shooting my white liquid up into the sky. I was coming so hard I thought I could shoot across the river. Karen watched in fascination, really interested to see what it looked like. But her little friend had run back to the main camp. I knew that I was in trouble.
"I'd better go, Karen, people don't like this ... "
As I began making my way back to the camp, I saw a few of the adults walking very quickly towards the spot where Karen, a fourteen year old nudist, had jerked me off. It was all so innocent and up until then, was the best sexual experience I had ever had. I began to see where my sexual instincts were taking me. I was to become obsessed with little girls.
On the drive home I tried to assess my own situation. I felt nothing of the remorse or guilt which I thought I should have. Instead, the memory of Karen's golden naked body and her small, tan hands riding up and down my prick warmed me and sent chills throughout my body. I realized that I was hooked and there would be nothing I could do about it.
But then I thought once again about the people coming after me. It was obvious that they would never allow me inside their camp again, and I would most likely be blacklisted from all nudist camps in the future. Then, there was the consideration of how to go about securing the kind of experience I had had with Karen with other girls. I mean, where does a guy go who wants to make it with teenage girls.?
These were my thoughts as I drove home. By the time I had arrived at my apartment, one thing had become very clear. I was about to embark on a new life-style that would be centered around this new found delight. I promised myself that every free hour I had would be devoted to the pursuit of this practice.
That night, I went to a bookstore that specialized in sex items. I found a magazine which featured only young girls. They were all naked, and posed especially for people with my interests. They lay with their legs spread, coyly smiling into the lens of the camera and showing the world their young, untouched cunts. It really turned me on to look at them and I decided to buy the booklet. On the way out, the owner asked me if I might not be interested in a special doll he had.
I bought the doll and took it home, almost coming in my car on the way with the excitement. The doll was made out of a plastic material and when inflated, was the life-size replica of a fourteen year old girl. The breasts were small and strong, and each one had a realistic nipple. The vagina was blonde and smooth, with some fine hair just kind of sparsely put there. Inside the vagina, the cavity was true to life, and felt just like a real one.
I set the doll up in my bedroom and undressed. I was erect as I took the doll into my arms and began stroking and fondling it. Then, I lay it on its back and spread the legs. I then took the booklet with the pictures of the little girls and opened it to a series that showed four different girls examining each others' cunts. Then I lay on top of the doll and inserted my penis into her soft, slippery cunt.
Emulating intercourse, I stared at the pictures and came inside the dolls cunt. It was a wild night, I made it five times and fell asleep with my cock aching like the Devil.
For a few weeks after this purchase, I did nothing but play with that doll in the manner described. I got to the point where every night I would have to jack off inside it or else I could not get to sleep. But as the weeks passed, my interest in the thing began to dwindle. I realized that what I had wanted all the time was the real thing, and that the doll had worked as a substitute. I guess there are some people who could have been satisfied with just the doll and never gone after the real thing. But that wasn't for me, and that's probably why I was considered to have a 'problem'.
I began going to the beaches on Saturday afternoons when the young people were there. I would take a book along and dark glasses and just lay there watching all the young golden bodies in their tiny bikinis walk by. I would roll over onto my stomach sometimes and rub my prick against the sand and come inside my bathing suit. This usually happened about twice every afternoon.
One afternoon, I saw two women who were in their twenties wearing nothing but their suit bottoms. They were walking around with their tits bouncing up and down and not concerned in the least whether anyone saw them or not. I knew where my desire lay, though, because at the moment when they were walking in front of me, a young thirteen year old girl was coming the other way. Her limbs were long and her figure almost boyish, but my eyes could hold no longer on the exposed tits and nipples of the older women. They obediently chased the little figure of the girl. I rolled over on my stomach and beat off into the sand.
My Daughter Britt had been attending school in the North during all of this and I very rarely thought of her. I hadn't seen her since she was eleven, and now she was fourteen. When I received her letter asking me to come up and visit her for the holidays, I just felt that this was another part of my life I had tried to forget. Britt had blamed me for the divorce and had refused to see or speak to me for the three years after. I did not care to argue with her at that time and maintained my distance. But it seems that she had found out that her mother was sleeping with another man, and this fact altered her opinion of the situation. Obviously, she was ready to forgive.
The school was located in the woods North of San Francisco. It was beautiful and had formerly been a monastic retreat where the monks had run a winery. The spot was secluded, aesthetic and very ethereal. When I drove the circle drive up to the main entrance, I began to feel dirty about myself. Somehow, the activities in which I had been indulging flooded back into my consciousness with a vengeance. I decided to reform, return to the normal life, and stop screwing around with my obsession.
I was lead through a small foyer into the waiting room by an elderly matron and told to wait. I sat down and waited until a vision of absolute beauty came bounding down the stairs like a little girl. Britt was turning into the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. With each step, she became intensely beautiful.
"Hello, daddy ... "
She leaped into my arms. I could feel the strength and lift of her small breasts as she pushed herself against me. I took her long, shiny blonde hair into my hands and then let it drop again down her slim, straight back. She was pressing hard against me, and I could feel her slim, strong thighs exerting pressure on my legs; and her small, flat belly pushing against my prick. Right there, in the foyer, I was getting hard.
I took her out of the building quickly and led her down the road to my car. She was wearing a short skirt and a white blouse. Her legs were strong and long, and her little ass wiggled beautifully beneath her dress.
When she got into the car, her dress rode high on her thighs, and I could see the beginning of her panties. The crotch was visible, and there were little blonde hairs peering out from that most desirable spot between her legs.
We talked about everything as I drove down the coast to the motel which I had booked us into for the weekend. She was a bright child, and very animated and fearless. I suppose the fact that she had been abandoned early in life forced her to develop a sense of strong individualism. She seemed adult and child-like at the same time. I began to sense that there was something totally immature about her, but that at the same time she was well aware of her own body and her own sensuality. The way she laughed, and the way she kind of cried and purred about things, like the ice cream cone, made me realize that she was developing her own way of handling men. She would break plenty of hearts before she was through, and she was already getting to mine in more ways than one.
We checked into the motel and went to our rooms. I had taken adjoining rooms with a door leading into each room from the hallway. The windows overlooked the ocean, and it was a relief as I listened to Britt unpacking, to contemplate the serenity of the sea. My heart and prick had been jumping wildly since early that day.
"Okay, daddy, let's go swimming!"
She stood in the doorway wearing a very tiny bikini. She had one leg thrown demurely in front of the other as though if she were to drop it back into position I would be able to see her crotch. She was smiling, and I detected a certain pleasure from her in the fact that she was showing me her body.
"You've certainly grown, Britt!"
"Haven't we all!" And then I noticed an almost undetectable flicker of her eyes towards my groin as she spoke. She laughed again and ran out of the room, waiting for me to chase her. I felt my prick pushing hard against the thin material of my bathing suit.
I sat on the sand and watched Britt play in the water. Her body was lithe and strong, but there was every element of the woman about her. She was at home in the water, and once again I noticed just how unafraid she was of the elements-both human and natural.
"C'mon in---it's great!"
I leaped to my feet and ran towards her. But at that moment a wave crashed down on her and threw her into the foam. She reached out for me and held me tightly around the thigh and the force of the ocean tried to draw her out. At the same moment, her hand slipped up between my legs and she touched my cock. It was like a feather passing over one's skin, but I was sure she had done it purposefully. "Wow!" she screamed, laughing and spitting out the salt water, "that was close!! ! "
Then, out of some kind of pure exuberance, she leaped on me, throwing her legs around my back and pushing her belly into mine.
"You feel nice!" she said, searching my face seriously with her sharp, green eyes.
"Do you like to feel?"
"It's all I have ... it's everything, no matter what!"
Then she released herself and ran back onto the beach. I fell beside her on the blanket. She began sunbathing and grew very quiet. She stretched herself towards the warm rays and spread her legs; She was the most desirable thing I had ever seen. I was hard again.
"Oh God, this feels so good. It's good to feel the sun going in everywhere ... it's like being full."
And then she flicked her eyes at me again. I knew she was saying it to me, but I couldn't take the chance and expose it. Not yet, anyway.
Back in the room, we separated so that we could take our showers and dress for dinner. I filled the tub and climbed inside. I purposefully left the water somewhat below normal in heat because I was already so hopped up that I'm sure the warm water would have made me come.
As I lay in the tub, I heard the door between our bedrooms open. Then I listened as her feet made squeaky noises as she crossed 'he carpeting.
"Mind if I talk?" She was standing in the doorway of the bathroom. She had a large terry cloth towel wrapped around her that all but made her disappear. It was a very appealing sight because her hair was still wet and she looked like a shiny, little doll dwarfed under that huge towel.
"Of course not, come in."
She plopped herself down on the toilet seat and avoided looking at my nakedness beneath the water. The towel slipped a little and her entire leg, way above her hip, was revealed. The sight of that stretch of white, untanned flesh sent my prick on a rampage, and I tried everything I knew to try and hold it down.
"It was really fun today, wasn't it?"
"Yes, I'm sorry we never got together before."
Her eyes flicked down at my groin, held on my bobbing meat, and wandered very slowly again to meet mine.
"Do you mind if I kiss you?"
"Certainly not!"
She leaned over, and the towel dropped from around her shoulders. One breast, white and pointed, flared out like it was the only thing in the room.
Her lips grazed mine, not like a child would when kissing her parents, but like a woman would when she is propositioning a man with a kiss.
Then, she let the towel fall down to her waist and reached behind my neck and pulled me towards her. She kissed me hard on the mouth, and drove her tongue deeply inside. I could feel her warm, little tits grazing my shoulder as she began twisting and turning into my mouth, swallowing me with her tongue and teeth. Then, she pulled back and drew the towel around her nudity. "Is it wrong."
"What?"
"To do that ... I mean, is there something wrong with that?"
I told her that I didn't think there was. But she was in a lousy mood anyway and got up from her seat and walked into the bedroom.
I was stiff as a board as I dried myself, realizing that all of the innuendos I had suspected earlier were exactly that-innuendos. The anticipation of events to come was almost overwhelming.
I threw a towel around me and walked into the bedroom. Britt was laying on my bed, staring up at the ceiling and dwarfed again in that ridiculous towel.
"Hey, don't be so sad, Britt, we're here to have fun!"
She held out her arms and silently asked me to lay on the bed next to her. I could feel the warmth of her body coming through her towel as I lowered myself onto the bed.
I realized at that moment that there was nothing more that I could say to her. I either would have to act now or forget the whole thing. I made my choice.
I rolled over and kissed her on the mouth. She threw her arms around me and pulled me tight against her body. She rolled onto her side and began pushing her stomach against mine. Then, her towel fell open and her naked body was wrapping around mine.
"Get naked, daddy..."
I threw my towel off and took her little naked body into my arms. She was incredible, stretching and sinking into my shape and form like we had been making love for years. Her belly was against my prick, and she was moving it up and down.
"Could I touch it?"
"Yes."
She reached down and gently took my prick into her hand. She moved it from side to side testing its agility, then began stroking it. She seemed fascinated by it, but was at the same time growing terribly excited.
"Let me blow you, first ... "
She didn't wait for an answer but turned herself around and lowered her sweet, virgin lips onto my prick. She stabbed at the head, then circled it with her tongue and finally took it into her mouth. She sucked and drew on it, knowing from somewhere just how to make it all work.
I watched her beautiful head bobbing up and down on my cock, then grabbed at her ass and pulled her towards me. She spread her legs immediately and opened her sweet cunt to my mouth. She was so fresh there, and the smooth blonde hair smelled of soap and perfume. I licked at her pink, moist lips and then found her clit. When I poked at it with my tongue, she squirmed.
I waited for a moment to see if I hadn't gone too fast. She understood and kept sucking on me. So, I drove into her vagina and began licking her inside. She was hot and ready, and the juices were pouring from her as though a dam had been broken.
Finally, she rolled off my cock and turned herself around. She was smiling and seemed very pleased with herself.
"Why don't you put it inside, now?"
"Okay."
"Good."
And that was that. She lay on her back, raised her knees and then let them fall apart. I rolled onto her small body and directed my prick towards her pearly gates.
It took some time before I was able to get inside her vagina. She was very small and a virgin. But we were both enjoying ourselves so much that each new bit of skin entered made it all worthwhile. Finally, though, I was able to go inside. We rested.
"Does that feel good?"
"Ummmmm . ... very..."
"Your first?"
"Of course!! ! " And she looked at me with feigned shock at such a question. Yes, my little girl was certainly learning the ropes.
"Do you like me?"
"Very much," she answered, squeezing her thighs together and capturing my cock inside her warm, smooth vagina.
"Will you want to do it again?"
"I'll want to do it every day, daddy, everyday! ! ! "
And then we began our first fuck for real. I began stroking her softly, easily while all the while going in deeper and harder. She was really getting behind it, thrashing and moaning beneath me like a woman of twice her age and experience. She loved it! And she kept calling for more, and more and more.
"Please . ... give me more ... come inside all the way! It's okay, it doesn't hurt!"
And then I came. She didn't that first time, but as the days passed and we learned how to love each other, she began to come almost every time.
Britt came to live with me and my life became a series of joys and pleasures of which I had never dreamed. She would always be playing jokes on me, putting down the taboos which frowned upon us and our activities. She knew and was always aware of what we were doing together, and she knew how to play with it.
After a year, however, she left. I found the note on the dresser in the bedroom. She addressed it to 'my dirty old man' and then proceeded to tell me that she was going to Europe for a while to 'work things out.'
Since then, I have seen many doctors. They help me to understand my problems and my tendencies. Yet, after all the words are spoken and after all the theories are handed down, I can only think of those years with Britt as being the happiest that I have ever had.
SUMMARY
This case represents what many experts today call the 'Lolita' syndrome. The desire to possess the nymphet is a very common one amongst men. Whether it becomes exposed or surfaces depends upon the individu-las background and environment.
In Jim's case, the environment played a very important part in the surfacing of his desire to possess young girls. Although we see that eventually it led to incest, it is quite possible that incest could have been only a secondary symptom.
Having been left high and dry by his wife, Jim found himself trying to satisfy his sexual cravings. His initial experiences seemed to indicate an attempt to develop relationships with women his own age. But because of the environment of the apartment complex, etc., he found it increasingly difficult to meet any prospects. Thus, his turning to voyeurism represents an initial step, of which he was aware, towards an unusual sex life. His 'dropping out' of the normal moral code allowed him to begin experiences with nymphs that otherwise he would have avoided.
Britt finds her own motivations based upon a duality which was running through her. First, she desperately wanted the love of a parent, and probably had she been younger she would have acted in other, less adult ways to get the attentions she so craved. But the fact that she had been sent away to school, and had obviously learned something about the sexual life of human beings, gave her the ability to use the power of womanhood and sexuality as bait for the love she could not otherwise receive from her father.
Both Britt and her father were the victims of a very unfortunate emotional situation. The fact that such drastic action as incest was taken on both their behalves illuminates the strength of their emotional needs. Neither was willing to forego what they needed emotionally because something was 'wrong.' Instead, they both went ahead and answered their own needs without regard to society's thinking on the matter.
It is conceivable that Jim and Britts' intelligence, plus their willingness to experiment and search, will lead them both into happier lives in the future. As is uncommon with most cases of incest, neither of them emerged from the relationship with at least, any visible scars.
CHAPTER SEVEN
The case of Kim S. is somewhat different than the 'normal' cases we have discussed involving incest. In this story, received from the young lady herself via a tape recorder, we find that the initial moves and advances came from her instead of her father.
Kim was born and raised in a typical suburb of Southern California. Her childhood up until age seven was normal. At that time, her mother left her father for another man. Her father, a normally 'devout' man, then began what proved to be a series of emotional and professional failures. Throughout this period of time, when Kim was seven until she reached the age of thirteen, she attached herself to her father with a strange kind of devotion that led to incest.
Now seventeen years old and extremely beautiful, with straight black hair and shining green eyes, the luscious young woman is somewhat confused about her behavior during those years with her father. She sees herself at once as a 'savior' and then again as a moral outcast. It will take an extensive amount of care and intelligent help for the girl to realize that the truth is very rarely a black and white matter, but that her actions were the result of abnormal stress plus an extreme amount of sensitivity on her part.
It seems as though my childhood actually began that year when my mother left us. I don't remember too much about her, and the last real image I have of her was that night when she walked out of the house crying. She was screaming at my father, telling him that he just didn't 'understand' her feelings about this other man. After she left, my father broke down and began to cry. I remember that at that point I began to develop all my love for him and kind of let the love I had had for my mother sink away into nothingness.
After that day, it was just my father and myself. We lived a pretty good life and got along well with each other. We actually became great friends, and my father would always tell me that I was the 'last love left in his life.' I felt that way about him, too, and I guess the attitudes we held for each other made it easier.
It took about a year after mothers' leaving before things started getting strange. I guess a lot of it had to do with the discovery of my own sexuality or something, because I began to have strange feelings about living with my father.
At that time, I had two playmates, a brother and sister, who used to come over all the time. We would build tents out in the back yard and sit in them all day, just telling jokes and screwing around. Jimmy was about ten and his sister, my age. I remember them both well because it was with them that I began exploring those secret places where kids weren't supposed to go.
One afternoon, when it was very cold and dark, we crawled inside our tent. Then Jimmy asked if he could 'see me.' I didn't know what he meant at the time, but when he pointed up between my legs and giggled I had a pretty good idea. I was very willing to show him my vagina, so I lifted my dress and pulled down my panties.
Both of them peered up between my legs at my little crack. They stared at me in silence for five minutes. I had a strange feeling, kind of like a tingling inside my cunt which I couldn't explain. I asked Jimmy what that meant and he laughed. Then he asked me if I didn't want to see him. I was pretty interested, and still am to this day, in the male penis.
He pulled down his pants and there was his little cock all nice and pink. He had a small erection and he held it out for me to see. Then he told me to touch it and I did. Then he touched me and tried to push his finger up my vagina, but it hurt too much so he stopped. All this time Beth was there watching.
Soon, though, all three of us were naked. We spent the entire afternoon searching and playing with each others' sex organs. I was terribly thrilled about the whole thing, and got what I believed to be really excited. I mean, sexually excited. There was this vague feeling in my stomach and in my cunt that sort of called for release. It was like an explosion underground that was muffled by everything above it, but was still there anyway. I became very wary of everything after that day because nothing seemed to be the same anymore.
Not much happened until a year after that. My father lost his job and went on unemployment. He would spend the mornings looking for work and then take the afternoons and be with me. We saw a lot of each other then, and I thought the whole thing was a big party. But there was something wrong, and the longer he was around, the clearer it became that something bad was happening to him.
He would scream at me about little things, then kind of try and apologize but then, minutes later, yell at me again about something new. He was changing and I began to feel like it was my fault, that I was doing something really harmful to him. I was beginning to think desperately of some way I could please him, make him happy like he had been before.
One night I accidentally walked into the bathroom while he was taking a leak. I became instantly fascinated with the size and breadth of his cock. It hung out there like a hose, so big and powerful, shooting out his piss like a fire hose. He told me to leave, but I told him I wanted to watch. He finished peeing and started to put his prick back inside his pants, but left it hanging out instead. I know now that he was drunk that night.
"So you dig my prick, eh?"
"Yes," I replied, feeling that strange clutch in my stomach again, "I like it very much. It's much bigger than Jimmy's..."
"Of course it is, Kim, it's supposed to be..." And he took it into his hands and held it out for me to see. But it started growing and became very hard and huge. I stared at it, realizing that I had turned him on in some way. The feeling inside grew even more intense and I began shaking.
"You want to watch?"
I nodded that I did, not realizing what he was going to do. He started beating himself off, stroking his prick easily and smoothly. He came quickly, shooting off into the toilet and dripping some down onto the floor. I was amazed watching all this and shaking like a leaf. I felt my vagina begin to tingle and my arms and legs felt like they didn't belong to me anymore. When he was finished and his cock was soft again, he tucked it back into his pants. Then he stared at me with a very strange look in his eyes. I still don't know today whether that look was one of fear or desire, or a combination of both.
Life from that moment on seemed to revolve around sex. I know that sounds silly because I was only ten years old. But there was something which made me different, a constant ache between my legs which would not go away. For a time, I thought seriously about running away and becoming a nun or something. But I knew at the time that my father needed me badly, and I couldn't let him down. I decided finally to stay with him and please him as much as I could. I knew he was going down and that nothing was working for him. It became my job, I thought, to give him everything that he didn't have. I guess, I became like a little wife to him. But above all this, there was something I wanted from him, too, and I was determined to get it.
That night when I had watched him stroke his prick, I dreamed and thought about that huge throbbing rod almost constantly. It became my reason for living, and just the idea of it spurting out like that would send shivers down my back.
Now, the doctors tell me that I am sexually precocious. At that time, I didn't know what the word meant ... and didn't care.
I began to really get forward with my father after that night. Anytime I could, I would get a glimpse of his penis. In the shower, when he was dressing or when he was going to the bathroom I would make some excuse for interrupting him. Then, I would just stand there and look at his meat hanging there between his legs. Then, it occurred to me that maybe he was interested in seeing my body. And, I was more than willing to show it to him.
I began this practice one night after he had gone to bed. I took a shower, then wrapped a towel around me and went into his bedroom. I stood in the doorway and talked about my day. Just as I turned to go, I let the towel drop. I had no breasts or hair on my cunt, but I knew that I was quickly shaping into a good looking girl. When I turned around to pick up the towel, I lingered for just a second so that he could see my vagina.
His eyes were riveted on me and I knew I had turned him on. As I walked back to the bedroom, I didn't bother to put the towel back on.
My daring inspired him because after that night, he began walking around the house naked. It was like a dream come true whenever he would walk into a room, his dick hanging long and big between his legs, his balls swinging around when he walked. Soon, both of us were parading around naked and getting pretty turned on.
The first real encounter I had with my father was the result of my actions. I was becoming more and more daring, and was beginning to stop at nothing to turn myself, and him, on. The feeling came over me to do this thing one night when he was sitting, dressed only in his underwear, in the big chair in the living room.
I walked into the room stark naked. His eyes traveled up and down my body, and I let him take me in. Then, I walked over to him and plopped myself down on his lap. He was kind of shocked and I could feel his cock and balls moving underneath my ass as he tried to adjust himself.
"Uh, Kim," he said, his voice becoming very strained, "I don't know..."
"Don't know what, daddy?" I was playing coy. I thought of myself as very sexy and desirable, even though I really didn't know what it was to be a woman.
"About this, I mean, it isn't right..." But he was getting hard. His prick was rising up straight and true beneath me and penetrating through the crack in my ass. Once again, that feeling in my stomach returned. I became very excited at the thought that on this night we were going to go farther than we had ever gone before. I think now that we both knew that.
"Daddy, you're getting big..."
I jumped off his lap. His prick was standing like a tent pole beneath his shorts. He was blushing but there was nothing he could do to cover his state.
I reached towards him and began to pull down his shorts. I wanted him naked like I was, and I wanted to touch and stroke his cock.
"Kim, what are you doing."
"Just let me, daddy, I know what's happening."
He raised his hips. I pulled his shorts over his prong, letting the big, hard organ snap back into place. It was sticking straight up and glistening with moisture.
"It's beautiful ... just beautiful!"
I held him, running my fingers over his hot skin and feeling him up along the length. He was hard as a rock, and his prick seemed to me the strongest, most powerful thing I had ever seen. I followed the length down to the base, then squeezed him gently and grabbed one of his balls. I played with the sac, then ran my finger back up between them and to the top again. It was like exploring a new land, and with every inch of him I found a new thrill.
"Don't you want to touch me?" I asked.
He smiled, and seemed kind of happy for the first time in a long time. I threw myself onto the floor in front of him and spread my legs. He stared into my vagina, penetrating every inch of that dark valley with his intense eyes.
"Think I'm beautiful."
"Gorgeous ... absolutely gorgeous!" He kneeled down between my legs. Carefully, gently, he began stroking my legs. His hands were rough and smooth at the same time. I had never known a touch to feel so wonderful as his did that night. Then he moved his hands to inside of my thighs. I could feel his fingers trembling slightly as he approached my crack.
"Don't worry, it's okay..."
He moved his fingers to my opening and just stroked my lips. The waves of excitement that were shooting through are indescribable. I thought I would burst out of my skin and disappear into the night ... it seemed as though everything was about to explode.
"Put your finger inside me..."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, very sure ... "
His movements were careful, he was afraid of hurting me. As his finger spread my lips and entered me, I rose to a new level of feeling. I felt truly invaded for the first time in my life, and the sensation was great. I wanted more of him inside me, enough so that I would be completely filled by him.
He began massaging me, stroking the inside of my vagina with a finger fuck. I began moving my hips up and down, and our rhythm soon became matched into perfect balance.
I took his cock into both of my hands and began pulling on it. I wanted it closer to me, and knew that someday I would have it inside my cunt. For now, though, I was contented just to stroke him while he stroked me.
When he came, the hot stuff poured all over my stomach. I felt like a woman, taking his seed onto my flesh. It was a good, warm feeling and was enhanced when he fell on top of me afterwards. I spread my legs and wrapped them around his back, and his cock touched the opening to my vagina. I would have taken him inside me at that moment if I hadn't been afraid of tearing myself wide open. As it was, I was already on the verge of hysterics because of the excitement.
We rested for a while and then moved into the bedroom. We got into the same bed that he and my mother had once fucked in. I thought about that while I snuggled up against his warm body, and realized that maybe he was replacing her with me. That made me feel horrible.
"Did you love mother more than me?"
"No ... you are more beautiful and more satisfying than she ever was, Kim."
It was all right again. I fondled his prick and felt the strength of him as he grew in my hand. He was hard again, and I was sure that I was pleasing him.
I kissed him on the mouth. Opening my lips, I took his tongue into my mouth and met it with mine. Then I pulled away and kissed his neck, traveling down to his groin. I licked the head of his prick, then ran my tongue down the ridge underneath and between his balls. I took each ball into my mouth and sucked on it, then rode the ridge back to the tip again. I opened my mouth as wide as I could and blew hot air onto his before taking his cock into my mouth.
He moaned loudly as my lips encircled him. His pelvis moved towards me and I allowed him to shove as much of his hot, sticky meat into me as he could. As I rode him back and forth, he began fingering me.
"Let me, Kim ... move over and I'll show you something."
He pulled my mouth away from his prick and rolled me over on my back. He began by kissing each of my toes, then my ankles and on up to my thighs. When he reached those, he jumped across my belly and kissed my neck. Then he sucked each one of my nipples, making them erect to the point where they began to ache. Then he tongued me down the center of my stomach to my belly. As he got closer, he slowed down, driving me into agony.
"Hurry! Lick me, daddy, lick me!! ! "
His tongue followed the crack down between my legs. He reached my vagina and stuck his tongue inside. It was warm and soft, and he kept moving it in and out as though it were a cock working into the darkness of my cunt.
I closed my thighs around his head, trying to pull him even closer, trying to get more of his tongue into my vagina. It was a wild feeling having him bobbing and weaving there, tonguing me and driving me into ecstasy.
But after all that, I still had not been fucked. I realized that everything we did to each other was only a prelude to the big one ... but I also knew that he would not allow his prick to enter me until I had at least grown some hair and developed some tits. This I did at age twelve, and after a few months of watching the dark shadows crossing my cunt and feeling the strain of my breasts on my training bra, I knew .that it would not be long before we really got into some fucking.
I would never occur to me that my father felt guilt or remorse over what had taken place between us. I had accepted the whole thing as natural, a way of satisfying feelings and urges inside myself and inside him. Just because we were father and daughter did not change the fact that those feeling existed. As a matter-of-fact, I felt that it was better that we were doing with each other rather than having me parade around the streets fucking with every guy I met. But, father did have misgivings about it. And one night these fears came out.
I had been away on a vacation with a friend and her family for six weeks during the summer. With my tan, and the white skin around my breasts and pussy, I felt like a real woman. I mean, those parts had developed and I did have a good body. When I returned home, I was creaming inside my panties with anticipation. I knew that this would be the big one, the real fuck ... finally!
But my father was vague towards me after my return. He was modest and seemed ashamed to look me in the eye. A change had come over him, and there were definite signs that what we had done together had caused him a great deal of shame and guilt. I was beside myself, and could not determine how to approach him.
It was evident, through it all, that he was still excited by me. Those glances were still there and once in awhile the old smile would return for just a second, then disappear again. I knew I still could please him, and it would be a matter of time until I could draw him out and into my cunt.
I walked through the house during those days as though I were trying to make some total stranger. I mean, I wore a skimpy bathing suit, wrapped towels around me so that my breasts were just barely visible, and did about everything else I could think of to attract him to me. Finally, one morning as I walked through the house in my panties and bra, it happened.
He was standing in the hallway, watching me walk toward the kitchen. I could feel his eyes on me, and the tension began growing between my legs. I was already wet by the time I reached the kitchen.
"Kim!" I turned around and ran back into his arms. We held each other strongly, tearing at our clothes until we were naked in each others' arms.
"Fuck me, daddy, I've waited so long ... ! ! ! "
He carried me into the bedroom and put me down onto the bed. He smiled as he lowered himself between my legs. My cunt was throbbing wildly as I watched his cock come closer to its final destination.
I reached between our bodies and guided his prick to the opening of my vagina.
Slowly, so slowly, he began pushing inside. My lips were being spread farther than they had ever been, and the tearing sensation shook me completely.
"Go easy ... slowly ... slowly..."
He did. His movements were excited but controlled. I could feel his tension and his determination to control himself as though it were my own. Every inch inside my cunt was like an electric shock passing through both of our bodies at the same time.
"All the way, daddy, come in all the way!"
He reached the end and we rested. I held him tightly inside me, feeling the mass of his meat throbbing and pulsating between the wet walls of my cunt. We began tearing into each other with the rhythms we had been using for two years. At that moment, as we plunged our bellies into each other, it became clear that everything we had been doing was only to prepare ourselves for this night. It was the ultimate fuck, one that took two whole years of anticipation and practice to achieve.
I orgasmed for the first time in my life. The floods of pleasure seemed to keep coming, one after the other, until I felt as though there was nothing left of me. We melted into each other, and knew ourselves for those momerits as one. We had achieved the ultimate in communication, a state which I would never achieve again. I held onto the moment as long as I could, knowing that one such as this would never be mine again.
SUMMARY
Sexual precociousness is not too rare amongst children growing up in our society today. Because of better foods, better knowledge and earlier maturation, more and more young people are becoming sexually active at earlier ages than ever before. If we examine tribes and cultures around the world, however, we soon discover that early sexual activity is not uncommon.
Basically, Kim was driven to her seductive ways by a number of motivations. She wanted desperately to please her father, make up for the sadness left inside him by her mother. She also, within the same psychological structure, desired to replace her missing mother as her fathers' object of sexual lust. Had her sexual appetites and sexual desires been less highly pitched and less demanding, Kim would have adopted other, less controversial methods of achieving these ends.
Differentiating this case from the norm of father-daughter incest is the fact that the father was actually seduced openly by his daughter. His situation in life, typical of the fathers who fornicate with their own daughters, only allowed him to be seduced and did not drive him to instigate the act. Thus, he became an ironic sort of victim who, in statistical analysis, would have born the weight of the guilt for committing such an act.
In later years, Kim left her father and sought a normal life. The realization that she will never have what she had with her father plagues her, but not to the point of distraction. She has learned and experienced enough in her short life to realize that to condemn herself for what happened between her father and herself would only be foolish. She knows and has been made aware of those basic motivations which led her into the relationship, and through this knowledge, she will almost certainly achieve growth as a . normal and well-adjusted human being.
SUMMARY
In the previous seven case histories, certain patterns of behavior have emerged which reflect some very important changes within the overall sexual patterns of today's world.
In this day and age, we find that the young girls involved in the previous cases were more prone to sexual intimacies than were their counterparts a decade ago. Their knowledge and openness about sex reflects the society in which we live. It is a society which is slowly teaching the young about their sexual nature. Instead of waiting for six years after puberty, the young are knowing and learning at the moment of puberty and before. Thus, their knowledge is coinciding with the development of their bodies.
It is also evident within these case histories that patterns which have existed throughout the ages are still present. The basic attraction of an older man to a young girl, or the nymph syndorme, is still present today. It is a natural propensity instilled within the character structure of those individuals who have not reached the full flowering of maturity. In the cases presented here, we see how various traumas and strongly emotional events do effect the maturity of the men, and of their daughters.
Father-daughter incest is regarded by all as highly moral sin. There is no way in which the act can be condoned, and none will go that far. But there are ramifications, emotional and physical, which are slowly being unearthed that will, at least, lend a better understanding of its presence.
What can be done about this moral outrage is to try to inderstand, through the study of the individuals concerned, just what their motivations and needs were. In this way, the act itself would be less condemned and those energies then devoted to helping those who are affected to a more rewarding existence. Open discussion and the acceptance of human nature are the ways in which these ends may be achieved. It is hoped that the channels for discussion will continue to open so that all people will have a chance at achieving a more satisfying sexual existence and, thus, a more satisfying life.
