CONTENTS Introduction CHAPTER ONE The Opera Ball CHAPTER TWO Two for One ... Is Good Odds CHAPTER THREE Honor Thy Father and Mother CHAPTER FOUR My Mother ... the Lesbian CHAPTER FIVE A Tale of Two Fathers Conclusion Bibliography
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INTRODUCTION
"Millie lay close to me. The voluptuous curve of her warm buttocks pressed close against my pelvis. The touch of her hot flesh against my prick caused it to get hard immediately. My lips were pressed against the back of her neck. It was sweaty and the saltiness of the drippings stung my tongue and aroused me to even greater heights of sexual ecstasy.
"My hard rod was moving into the crevice of her ass. As the head of it brushed against her rectum, I felt it tighten in a defensive reflex action. I shivered with delight. The head of my probing penis had reached the entrance to her moist little cunt. Her pubic hairs were like small wires, almost like tiny electrical filaments that transferred minute shocks to my eager and anxious prick.
"Millie spread her legs instinctively, though she was still asleep. My prick entered her vagina, slowly at first and, as the warm walls surrounded it, plunged fiercely into the remaining cavity. She gave a start as my tool banged against the tip of her womb. Her hand slipped down and patted my ass reassuringly. I knew, once again, that I was very, very welcome. She then pressed her buttocks tightly against me and began to gyrate her hips. I reached my arms up under her armpits and clung to her shoulders. I felt the blood surging into my penis and the sperm struggling to rise from its mysterious reservoir.
"She was becoming fully aroused and the rapidity with which she manipulated her glory hole was tremendously exciting. It was all I could do to keep from ejaculating right then and there. But I knew that Millie would be terribly disappointed if I left her hung up. She did, for a fact, get extremely ugly the last time I went off a bit prematurely.
"I could feel her breasts pressing against the insides of my forearms as her breathing accelerated. I buried my face into her hair and gently bit the back of her' neck. She began to writhe frantically with pleasure. Both our bodies were covered with sweat and it was insufferably hot under the blanket. I managed to kick the blankets off and, in doing so, uncovered Monica who was sleeping to the other side of me. She muttered something about it being cold and drifted back to sleep.
"I was plunging wildly into Millie's luscious cunt. I could feel the head of my cock swelling. Oh God, how I wanted to come! I couldn't hold it back any longer and with a moan, I released the hot stuff into Millie's hungry, pink pit. Millie went rigid for a brief second and seized my hands in hers. I knew that she had reached complete and satisfactory orgasm at that instant. I had an immediate sense of well-being.
"My hot tool was spurting like a runaway fire hose. Millie pushed her butt tight up against me with one final spasm of ecstasy. I felt a slight burning sensation as I shot the final drop of semen into her. She contracted her vaginal muscles which sent shock waves through my body from my quickly softening prick. With each contraction I jumped a bit, which disturbed the sleeping Monica. 'Oh, Dad,' she muttered with a discomforting tone to her voice, 'lie still. I can't sleep with you jumping about like that.' Monica is Millie's identical twin. They look so very much alike that I can never really tell them apart, which sometimes causes me a problem.
"My prick slid out of Millie's crack. It was still semi-hard, but I was in no shape whatsoever to continue. I rolled over onto my other side and reached over Monica to the nightstand and grabbed my cigarettes and lighter. I lit a cigarette and took a deep drag. Millie was snuggled close to me, her head buried in my armpit. Monica was lying close to me, also. Monica looked like she was asleep, but, I somehow thought different. The moonlight was bright and I could see her features outlined very distinctly in the dimness. Her eyelashes occasionally fluttered. My suspicions were fully justified; she was completely awake and only feigning slumber. She probably was a silent witness to her sister's recent sexual activity.
"I turned my head until I was facing her. She looked so very beautiful, the silver moonlight reflected on her face. In many ways, she was much more beautiful than her sister Millie. Their personalities were quite the opposite, also. Millie was a bit of a hoyden, while Monica was very sophisticated and outwardly more sensuous. Indulging in a mischievous impulse, I sucked in a mouthful of smoke and blew it into her face. The reaction was instant! Monica bolted to an upright position, coughing and sputtering. Then we both laughed.
" 'You imp,' I said, 'you were awake all the time.'
"She giggled. 'I got so horny lying there, listening to you two fucking away so happily, I was hoping you'd be able to save some for me. But, from the way you groaned, I imagine that you are completely spent?'
"I replied, 'Almost,' and chuckled.
"Monica said, 'I bet I can get you hard again.'
"I was intrigued and took up her challenge. Throwing back the bedclothes, I exposed my nude body to her lecherous eyes. She lifted herself on one elbow and pressed her head close to my chest and let her moist tongue dart in and out as she moved stealthily over every ticklish spot on my torso. I felt a tremor of response from my genital area but I knew damned well that she would have to do a lot more to get me aroused enough to shoot off another load.
"Her nose was brushing against my pubic hair and the feeling that I sensed from her warm breath against my still wet cock was exhilarating. She took my tired tool between her long, slim fingers and, stretching it out, gently allowed her lips to encompass it. I was beginning to respond. The warmth of her wet lips around it made me tingle all over. God, I thought to myself, how lucky can a guy get?
"By then, I was quite hard and any second I would be ejaculating my last reserve of hot sperm into that lovely little mouth of hers. I could feel myself coming already. I stiffened my body as I thrust my hips upward so that all my cock would be in her mouth as I shot my load. As I raised up off of the bed, Monica's hands grabbed me by the buttocks and held me in position as the hot, creamy goo shot into her oral orifice. I moaned with pleasure as she made those delicious gulping sounds. Monica liked sucking cocks more than anything and I would have been the last one in the world to object.
"I was sure that she had reached orgasm during this act, as she was breathing very hard at my climax. She lowered my buttocks back to the bedsheet and collapsed with her lips still around my shrinking cock. She had swallowed every last drop of sperm.
"I could see that Monica was exhausted and would soon be in a deep satisfied slumber like her sister Millie. I was also pretty pooped after this double-header and longed for the quiet solitude of my own bed. I quietly arose and, tiptoeing out of the bedroom and down the hall, entered my own bedroom and, sliding very quietly between the sheets, settled down for a satisfied night's sleep. In doing this, I was very careful not to wake the wife.
"Marge stirred her gross and repugnant body as I so quietly settled down next to her. Oh, how I wished we had had twin beds, but that would have lost me the whole kettle of fish. I just hoped with all that I had in me that she wouldn't get sexy as she sometimes did late at night. I had not stuck my prick in her for almost three weeks. It was getting more difficult to have sexual relations with her, especially since I'd been fooling around with those two Venuses down the hall. Besides, Marge was fat and ugly and her breath perpetually smelled of gin.
"I turned my back to her and quickly dropped off to sleep with visions of voluptuous sex dancing through my head. I was beat but I surely felt magnificent.
"The next morning, I hummed with happy satisfaction as I took the 8:40 to the city. I was still humming up to the moment that my secretary informed me that J. M. wanted to see me in his office. J. M. was Marge's father, the president of the agency and my boss! He was a nice guy and a smart businessman; so smart, in fact, that he had conned me into marrying his fat, widowed daughter in return for a vice-presidency in the firm, a home in Westchester and $45,000 a year. In the beginning, I had thought that I had made the coup of the century. Now I would be willing to trade the whole mess for an office boy's salary-except for a couple of things-Millie and Monica, my two over-sexed step children who were the saving grace.
"What J. M. had to tell me came as a shock. I was being transferred to Los Angeles to try to save a failing situation with the agency's branch there. I couldn't very well refuse and the thought of getting away from Marge was certainly a pleasant one, but I couldn't bear the idea of leaving the girls. It certainly was an anguishing situation. I downed quite a few martinis in the club car on the way home that evening. Then I had a marvelous idea-why not take the girls with me? I was sure they'd enjoy a trip to the coast. Then I nixed it; Marge would want to come, too. 'Well,' I said gulping down the last martini as the train slowed to a stop at my station, 'I will certainly think of something.'
"Monica thought of it for me. She had always been interested in the theater and, to her, Los Angeles meant H*0*L*L*Y*W*0*0*D! and she saw that this was the perfect way to get launched as a movie starlet. She suggested coming out to the coast with me and said that she would be of so much use to me-hostessing formal dinners, maintaining the apartment and other things that, of course, we could not mention to Marge. Monica's enthusiasm broke down her mother's reluctance and, a week later, United Flight No. 344 carried a very happy couple to the City of the Angels.
"The agency had leased a lovely two-bedroom apartment on Wilshire Boulevard for us. When Kearns, the manager, showed us through the unit he expressed great pride in the layout. Monica expressed great delight in what was to be her room, but inwardly we felt very smug in the inner knowledge that we both carried-there would be very little sleeping done in it, unless we desired a change of scene.
"So we quickly settled into our nice, new environment and it was just delightful. It was such a great relief not to have to return to my wife's unhappy bed every morning. Monica enjoyed it, too. She mentioned, and I hadn't noticed until then, that she resented having to share me with Millie; so we had a beautiful sexual ball.
"One late afternoon when we had returned from a delightful day at the beach, I was feeling quite horny after watching Monica running around the beach in a mini-bikini, followed her into the shower. She looked magnificent. The suds were running down over her well-tanned body. Little rivulets of the soapy stuff was coursing down the cleavage of her gorgeous breasts and collecting in the bush of pubic hair that covered her sweet little cunt.
"Quickly stripping off my trunks, I jumped in the shower with her and, grabbing a washcloth, began washing her back. She responded by pushing her buttocks into my groin. That gesture made my cock begin to stiffen immediately. Suddenly, she turned around and, dropping down on her knees, seized the washcloth from my trembling hand and began to wash my cock and balls. The sensation was really something! After getting it thoroughly soapy, she moved back and allowed the shower spray to rinse it completely. Then, taking it gently in one delicate hand, she began to suck on it slowly at first, but gradually increasing tempo until I thought T would blow right there.
"If you could imagine the thrill of the whole act being done in that steamy shower-Monica's golden body glistening with streams of silvery water cascading down and her head bobbing rhythmically as she hungrily devoured my throbbing cock. Her nipples were distended and pressed against the front of my thighs which caused me even more excitement. I was unable to hold back ejaculation any longer and I let the hot sperm burn its way out of its prison and shoot with great passion into that gentle mouth. Monica tensed for just an instant as the hot stuff surged into her mouth, almost gagging her. My darling didn't even miss a stroke, though, and she sucked out every drop. My knees became very weak after this and I had to hold onto the shower faucet handles in order not to collapse.
"Monica spit out the gobs and gobs of sperm and we both watched the spray force them, like tiny white snakes, through the holes in the metal drain in the stall floor. We stepped out of the shower and dried each other briskly. We both felt very happy. As soon as we were dry, I picked her up and carried her to the bed, where I carefully laid her down on the crisp lavender sheets. She looked so beautiful, lying there with her legs spread apart, the golden fluffy hairs of her cunt glistening in the light of the setting sun. I felt my tongue and lips quiver with excitement as I contemplated cunnilingus with that heavenly genital.
"I lay down at the foot of the bed and inched my way up towards her until my face was just above her crotch. She reached down and placed both hands on the back of my head and gently, but firmly, pushed my face into her golden bush. It smelled so clean and fresh.
"It tasted even better. As I slid my eager tongue in between those delicious cunt lips, she writhed with pleasure. I felt her back raise from the sheets as she drew close to orgasm. My cock had been sucked dry, just a few moments before, but it stirred once again in response to the erotic stimulation I was receiving. I darted my tongue back and forth with fierce motions and she reached climax within seconds. Her fingers gripped my hair and I thought she would tear it out by the roots. I wanted to yelp, but in order to do so I would have had to stop sucking that magnificent vagina. So, bravely I persevered and continued the stimulation that was driving Monica wild with ecstasy.
"That's just about the way my sex life with Monica went during the first few months out in sunny California. Monica wasn't the only chick that I balled, but, in the home stretch, she certainly was the best of them all. You see, the girls of Hollywood are in a class by themselves. Very few of them have the outward sophistication of their New York sisters.
"Monica had met Valerie in one of the casting offices. like Monica, she was an aspiring actress. I had heard a lot about her from Monica, but didn't realize from her description that Valerie was the magnificent redhead that stood at our door early on a particular Saturday morning. Monica had gone shopping and I was lounging around in pajama bottoms with my first martini of the day, when the doorbell rang. I opened it and this absolute vision of loveliness was standing before my eyes."
Narrations like this are certainly not rare in the volumes of psychiatric case histories. Cases of incest between fathers and daughters are far more prevalent than the average person realizes. Cultural standards vary in all societies and man's moralities are based on existing mores of the society in which he lives. In some cases, these social mores prevent a parent from becoming involved in incestuous situations because social or religious restrictions decree that such activity is "wicked" or against "divine law."
Most authorities have conflicting theories regarding incest, but they agree that free indulgence in this aberration is incompatible with family or social order, and if tolerated, no meaningful, fully developed culture could evolve.
As to the "natural" or "unnatural" qualities of incestual behavior, many authorities differ as to classifying incest impulses either as one or the other. Westermarck claims that there is a natural aversion to incest while, on the other hand, Sigmund Freud expounds the theory that the incestual impulse is there even in infancy and is therefore a natural inclination. Malinowski argues that neither Freud nor Westermarck is correct, and that the incest "urge" is a product of cultural environment.
In Psychology of Sex, Havelock Ellis expounds a synthesis of these divergent views. He bases this on the assumption that there is usually a sexual attraction between persons who are continually in close contact, and that this also includes people who are often closely related. He suggests that this "incestuous" attraction is rather mild and is quickly displaced when a fascinating new object of desire from outside the object's own circle appears. He insists that there is no anti-incestuous instinct, no natural aversion, and that the deep stirring of sexual excitement is stimulated by an unfamiliar object, and not by one of close familiarity.
Ellis claims that though incestuous desires are weak under normal circumstances, there are always exceptions, as there are in every other theory of study of human behavior. Whether or not Monica's or Millie's relationship with their father will have been of either a constructive or damaging nature remains to be seen. In most cases of incest between father and daughter, the outcome has usually been anything but happy. In the cases of the daughters, many "hang-ups" have been the norm, and only therapy has been capable of correcting the damaging traumatic effects of this type of sexual union.
It is the child who is usually the innocent victim, but the reader will find, as he studies these cases, that sometimes it is the adult who has become the unwilling partner of this aberrational activity.
A child sometimes will cooperate with a lustful parent out of fear, or out of a desire to please, or, in many cases, out of an ignorance of the morality of the act itself.
Freud opened the door to many speculative theories, since he brought analytical study of man's sex life out of the Victorian closet and into fashion, in fact, to such a degree of prominence that nearly everyone is an armchair sexologist. To the layman, many abstract theories have made confusion the norm, and only qualified psychologists and psychiatrists should really be quoted and questioned. It is a proven scientific fact, though, that inbreeding produces an inferior offspring in a majority of cases, and on that basis alone incest should be avoided. As Ellis has stated, man's basic sex-drive is stimulated by a new face rather than an old one, so it is somewhat natural for a person to seek sexual gratification completely outside the family group.
Interesting aspects are naturally provided by exceptions to the rule, of course. These may be correctly described as extreme cases although they do enable us to define, with some accuracy, the subject of incest, as a whole. Erich Fromm has stated that physiologically, man belongs to the animal kingdom, but that man's life is inescapable from the alternatives of regression and progression. In other words, to regress to an animal-like existence or to arrive at the utmost peak of human evolution is man's destiny alone.
As far as the subject of incest is concerned, man can and has behaved like an animal. But, being uniquely human, human emotion supplants the "animal urges." The term "Love" therefore enters into the biological system and elevates man from that of animal sexuality, thus bringing a simple biological function to a spiritual plane. And doctors agree that a great number of their patients admit to an incestual urge upon certain occasions, but have suppressed them. The cases reported in this book are those which were totally unsuppressed, either because of an overwhelming attraction between the people involved, or by mere physical impulses that they were unable to control.
The work of such researchers as Kinsey and Masters and Johnson have given us great insight into man's sexual functions and the problems these functions sometimes create. These researchers and their brethren have been praised but also scourged, by certain segments of society. Some groups deride them for bringing sex down to the "technological plane," while others feel that they have "raised" it. But only when the physiological aspects become fully understood will man be able to understand the finer attributes of sex. One must start with the basics. And sex, basically, is physiological. Man's sensitivity alone has made it more pleasurable and, in some cases, virtually artistic. Art, after all, is a human improvement on nature.
So, in order to understand the problems of incest better, we have to return to the basics, for that alone can give us an understanding of these human beings who find their sexual desires moving into an aberrational maze. In order to grasp the intent, the following case histories reported here are, in content, exactly as they had been related to the author. Every detail has been included to assure the reader full comprehension of the situation.
To give the reader a complete solution to the causes of incest would be almost impossible. Medical science has, in reality, only begun to scratch the surface. like the five blind men and the elephant, each only grasped what he could understand. The author has, in all sincerity, attempted to introduce to the layman an easily understood volume of documented case histories that will be of sufficient information to instruct the concerned and interested individual.
Since the beginning of recorded history incest has been with us. In ancient Egypt it was practiced by high and low classes. In Rome, it helped lead to the downfall of empires. It has produced geniuses and it has produced matimen. It has inspired novelists, historians, and scientists to probe its intricacies. From that privileged citizen of Sodom and Gomorrah, Lot and his daughters, to the caves and communes of Hippiedom, it has been, is, and will be forever with us. Only understanding and treatment can erase this blemish from the countenance of man.
To gain proper insight into the history and causes of incest which had its origins in primitive societies, let us view something of its historical background. Lord Raglan reports in Jocasta's Crime:
Perhaps no other sin was regarded with greater horror among the Ashanti. Both parties in the offense were killed. Had such an act been allowed to pass unpunished, then hunters would have to cease killing animals in the forest, the crops would have refused to bear fruit, children would have ceased to be born, the spirits of the dead ancestors would have been infuriated and the gods angered, clans would cease to exist and all would have been chaos in the world.
Weinberg, in Incest Behavior, tells us: "The family system of the Hebrew, Greeks, Romans and Chinese were patriarchal and father-dominated. The Hebrews, originally nomadic, settled and listed incest among their Mosaic law." Weinberg further states: "The varied penalties for incest were ostracism, ritualistic curse witnessed by the people, and death. Banishment was specified in brother-sister relationships. The development of incest-taboo is reflected in the record of its infraction. Lot committed incest with his daughters at their instigation because they wanted children, (and) Moses was the son of an aunt and nephew. Ezekial protested the laxity of the incest laws during the Babylonian exile. But, during the later stay of the Hebrews in Palestine the incest taboo became more effective."
The Greeks, according to Weinberg, forbade marriage and sex relations between parents and children, full brothers and sisters and between siblings of the same mother and not the same father. Uncle-niece and nephew-aUnt marriages were allowed. Cousin marriages were common and actually preferred to extra-kin marriages. Despite this leniency, they vigorously forbade sex relations between members of the same family. This taboo was most stringent between mothers and sons. Incest marriage between the gods were described in mythology. Oceanus and Hyperion, Kronos and Rhea, Zeus and Herawho were full siblings-had married. However, this god-like prerogative was all the more forbidden for mortals.
The ancient Romans were even more strict. They forbade marriage with aliens, between patricians and plebeians, and between freemen and slaves. Later on, marriages between the emperors and close blood relatives occurred, but after all, they were thought of, by their own command, as gods themselves.
Concurrent with the ancient Hebrew, Roman and Greek societies, there existed the contiguous Egyptian society. Marriage between brother-sister and father-daughter were exclusively practiced. Ramses II not only married two of his sisters, but also wed two of his daughters.
During the Middle Ages in which the ascendancy of the Catholic Church burst like a mortalizing comet upon Western European civilization it became necessary to coordinate the marriage and sex laws. Ecclesiastical laws extended to incest as well as other phenomena dealing with sex and marriage. The Catholic Church prohibited marriage between blood relatives, between those related by marriage, between god-relatives or between relatives of illicit sex partners.
It is interesting to note that these broad restrictions against marriage, especially prior to the thirteenth century, were not reflections of the people's attitudes. The purposes were, and implemented as such, for the church to obtain revenue from the sale of dispensations and to secure and retain the goodwill of the royal families of Catholic Europe who were prone to marry relatives.
In the early nineteenth century, the rationale against incest was ethical and social as in the previous periods, but physiological reasons also arose, became especially prominent in the third quarter of the nineteenth century and still remain at the present time.
In the United States, incest laws may vary from state to state. B.J. Oliver, Jr., in Sexual Deviation in American Society, writes:
It is interesting to note that the Mormons practiced incest in this country until 1892, when both the incest and polygamy practices were outlawed by the Utah legislature. The relationship in and penalty for incest vary in the U.S. In twenty-one states it is illegal for first cousins to marry. In California an offender may be penalized for incest by a sentence up to fifty years in prison.
In Nebraska a male parent if guilty of incest by a sentence of not less than twenty years, while in Virginia the offender is fined five hundred dollars or is sentenced to only six months imprisonment.
Definition of the nature of incest varies from state to state, but in no state is the marriage between parents and children, between siblings, grandparents and grandchildren, uncles and nieces, and aunts and nephews permitted.
In Freud's view, in every family, despite forces of cohesion, there are also inherent seething forces of disruption. Should there be imbalance among any family members, incestuous behavior could possibly occur and bring the family unit to the stage of complete chaos.
Ever since Sigmund Freud's passion of mind dared to sweep away the cobwebs that obscured man's sexuality, educated and intellectual mankind has striven to better understand itself. With this theme in mind, the author has attempted, with this work, to shed a little more light on one of the great complexities of human existence. With faith that man's greater understanding of man will lead eventually to a better world and a more peaceful planet this study is humbly contributed.
CHAPTER ONE
The Opera Ball
"I don't know what made me do it, perhaps I'd had too many schnapps, but I took my daughter, Simone in my arms and kissed her passionately on the lips. To my later horror, Simone responded. Pressing her body close to mine, I felt her ripe breasts-Sheila's breasts against me. In my drunken state Simone was Sheila. Sheila has come back to me, I thought as I ripped off the buttons that held the front of Simone's dress together. She did not offer the slightest bit of even token resistance; she just stood there, smiling, as I took those two gorgeous globes into my trembling hands and smothered them with kisses.
"The next thing I was conscious of was that we were lying on the bear rug in front of the flaming fireplace and Simone was tearing at my fly with great fury. The more the old passion was aroused for Sheila, the more Simone became Sheila. I struggled out of my pants as Simone-Sheila lay on her back, delicately removing her silken panties and spreading her legs wide, at the same time reaching towards me with welcoming arms. I mounted her, my aching penis ready to burst. As I entered, I cried out in sheer ecstasy; I could feel the exquisite contractions of her cunt massage my throbbing penis.
" 'Sheila! Sheila!' I shouted as I plunged my sex rod deeper and deeper into that golden crevice.
"She cried out in return, 'Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!' as I shot load after load of pent-up sperm into her.
" 'What, Simone?' I cried as it suddenly and cruelly occurred to me that this was Simone, my very own, lovely daughter, I was so violently fucking. She was crying out 'Daddy' not in fear or repulsion but in absolute ecstasy. She wanted me, my own daughter was happily having an orgasm with her own father.
"I suddenly felt nauseated and pulled out and returned to the sofa, where I sat down and poured a stiff belt of schnapps, which I quickly downed.
"I looked at Simone, lying there on the bear rug, glassy-eyed, with a look of triumph and extreme satisfaction on her face. Her legs were still apart and her cunt hairs shone golden in the firelight. I saw the residue of my semen dripping out of her cunt and onto the fur of the rug. She was breathing very hard and obviously still was in an orgasmic state. I was sick with self-disgust. Simone smiled at me, rose from the rug and came and sat down beside me on the sofa. She put her arm around my shoulder and kissed me gently on the temple. I shivered and drew away from her, but she held to me even more tightly. 'Oh, Daddy,' she said in velvet tones, 'I've wanted you for so long.'
"I was in no mood to be consoled. I, to my own sense of shame and as an offense to my own standards of morality, had committed the most horrible of all sexual offenses-incest! How could I, as drunk as I was, have been insane enough to imagine, even for an instant, that my seventeen-year-old daughter was my long dead wife, Sheila. I must have been mad-a fiend, the kind of monster one reads about in the tabloid newspapers. I just couldn't believe that I had been capable of such an awful thing. Simone was sitting there, telling me that everything would be all right, and that she had always wanted to have sexual relations with me, ever since she first became aware of her own sex-hunger. In my drunken state, I thought that since she didn't feel the least bit guilty about it, why should I? I staggered off to my bed. My sleep that night was haunted by the most erotic of dreams.
"I awoke the next morning with a tremendous hard on. I wanted Sheila-oh, God! how I wanted Sheila. I suddenly realized that I wanted Simone! I ran to her room. Throwing open the door, I beheld my lovely daughter, lying spread-eagled on her bed, reading the morning Tagblatt. I saw that golden-tressed vagina smiling at me, and beyond that the two gorgeous mounds of her breasts, surmounted by those cherry-like nipples. Simone put the newspaper aside and said, in that velvet tone of hers, 'Come-lie down beside me.'
"Numbly, guiltily, I did as she bid me. I still had this big erection, and it didn't take her long to work on it. As she gently tickled my balls with her delicate white hand, she placed her tongue against my throbbing shaft. It quivered with absolute delight. Conscience be damned, I thought. This is gteat, and I'm keeping it in the family.
"Just as I was about to ejaculate, Simone abruptly ceased her tonguing titillation and swung herself up and over me, sitting down on my surging cock. I had no intention whatsoever of pulling out this time, that was for damn sure. Her vagina closed tightly around it and held it in almost a vise-like grip as she bounced up and down just as if she were riding a trotting horse.
"I was in absolute ecstasy. I gazed up at her through half-closed eyes. Her beautiful tits were bouncing in contrasting rhythm to the movement of her torso. If I could've, I would have raised myself up until I could have sunk my teeth into those ripe nipples that bounced so enticingly before me. I felt surely, in my passion, my cock would burst or break off inside that beautiful hollow of pleasure.
"Simone kept bouncing up and down with increasing abandon and her eyes-the pupils, that is-were rolling up beneath her eyelids. The area on her bosom between and just above her breasts was turning pinkish, one of the few genuine signs that prove without a doubt that a woman is experiencing orgasm. She was giving out short sighs, each one a bit higher in pitch than its predecessor. I was wild with the urge to come. When I could hold back no longer and finally released my surging juice, Simone gave out a groan of immense and total satisfaction. She collapsed atop me, burying her face in my neck and shoulders. She began to sob-not tears of heartache, but tears of happiness. She said that she was gloriously happy-the happiest that she had ever been in her life. I was happy, too, in that moment. I had never been able to recreate Sheila, and now here was Sheila in the flesh, Sheila's own flesh. I was, quite understandably, deliriously happy.
"Simone was not yet satiated. After recovering from her tearful outburst of joy, she started to kiss me on the lips first and then commenced to work down the length of my body. I don't think there was a spot that she missed, not even the cracks between my toes. As spent as I was, I still felt the fires of passion stir within me. I felt a slight pain, like a sprained muscle in my balls and then I felt the first inkling that I might be able to maintain a second erection. My gaze fell upon Simone. She smiled and, scrunching down on the bed, she placed her face over my no longer dormant cock.
"She was smiling as she took my cock into her mouth. The head of it scraped against her exposed teeth. It hurt kind of nice. As she started sucking upon it, I felt a twinge of pain. Her tongue felt like sandpaper, so sensitive was my cock's surface, but I didn't dare ask her to stop. I really was getting very, very hard again. Suddenly Simone threw her leg over my head and lowered her fragrant pussy onto my face. It was warm and drippy from our mutual ejaculation and emission. I began to use my tongue to agitate the lips of her vulva. It trembled in voluptuous response. Then I gently, with the tip of my tongue, massaged her tiny clitoris. She began to squirm with pleasure. I then wrapped my arms about her hips and pulled her down to me as close as I could. I began blowing into and then sucking back my own breath from her pussy. She wriggled and sucked even harder on my cock. Myself, I was sucking her so hard it was a wonder that her pussy didn't turn inside out.
"She was going up and down on my cock so intensely that I thought any moment it would either catch on fire from the friction or be totally uprooted. It was so swollen and gorged with blood I was sure my veins and arteries would soon burst. Simone's perfect white teeth were delightfully tickling. Finally, unable to restrain myself, I came. It was a great gob of the hot stuff, not as much as my first salvo, but enough to cause poor Simone to gag a little. But she managed to contain it and herself. I heard her gulp and then eagerly swallow the essence of me. I could tell that she savored every sticky, sweet drop of it.
"It was obvious that we had reached mutual orgasms. Once again she collapsed on top of me, but she managed to keep my cock in her mouth. I ejected the last few drops of sperm that it contained and as it began to go soft and shrink she still sucked it and rolled it around her mouth with her tongue.
"We continued to play our erotic games until exhaustion overcame the both of us and we drifted off into a deep sleep that lasted until late that afternoon. I really began to feel that
Sheila was once again back with me. When Simone and I were locked together and our secret passions blended until they were one, she became Sheila. She looked like Sheila, talked like Sheila and, by God, she even fucked like Sheila!
"For the rest of the holiday season, Simone and I stayed holed up in the lodge. Christmas became an orgy for two.
"I never worried much about Simone and other men. I was a very protective father, but I realized that my protectiveness had been just a mask for my incestuous jealousy. To put it into blunt words, I had always wanted Simone, since it first dawned on me that she was the image of her late mother. Only now did I become aware of my subconscious lust for my own daughter. It didn't take me long to reconcile myself to it, with considerable pleasure, as a matter-of-fact. We became inseparable from this time on.
"One time in Vienna our delicious secret was discovered. In the Prater amusement park there is this gigantic ferris wheel. The people who take this thrilling ride enter individual little cars that somewhat resemble minute railway carriages. Simone and I were snuggled together in one of them on a cold November's Sunday. As we were reaching the apex of the ride Simone laughingly suggested that wouldn't it be even more thrilling if we could have some sex high above the rooftops of Vienna. I replied like the good sport I always considered myself, 'Sure-I'm game for anything!' Simone then got down on her knees between my legs and, drawing the heavy woolen blanket over her head, proceeded to unzip my fly. Her hands were a trifle cold and I jumped a bit as she pulled my cock out from its warm hiding place. She kissed the tip of it several times to entice it to a proper hardness. Once this was accomplished, she opened her mouth and let her lips surround its head and then descend down the length of its shaft. Then slowly she began sucking on it with a loving technique that she had so ably mastered. I felt it get bigger and bigger as she so industriously concentrated on her pleasure. I let my head rest against the back of the seat and succumbed to the thrilling experience. In fact, I was so engrossed in my erotic ecstasy that I was not aware that the big ferris wheel had stopped.
"I was just in the process of coming into Simone's expectant mouth when the attendant opened the doors to the car. In alarm, I jumped up and so did Simone. The blanket dropped from her head and shoulders, and poor Simone looked directly into the faces of two octogenarian ladies who were waiting to board the car. Precisely at that instant I shot my load, catching Simone squarely in the face. Hastily returning my still erect cock to its proper place and still zipping up my fly, we dashed to a waiting cab that luckily was waiting nearby. Once safely in the cab and some distance from the Prater, we both started to laugh.
"I said, 'Now I know what a person with egg on his face feels like.'
" 'It isn't egg, darling,' Simone replied with an impish grin and reached for my lapel pocket handkerchief.
"Life was beautiful for us. In the course of my operatic career, I sang guest performances in just about every opera house in German-speaking Europe. Simone was always by my side and in my bed.
"I loved her body. Milk white and slim, she was the exact incarnation of Sheila. When I was with her it was like she was no longer Simone; she was Sheila. Her lovely breasts, so pure, so delicate, were delicious. And that glorious snatch, every inch of its sensuous lining, it was the cathedral of my heart. When I plunged my eager cock deep inside it, an angel sang and I was in heaven. One night when we were in Salzburg for the Mozart Festival, she came into my room. I was lying in bed, reading. She looked lovely. Clad in an almost transparent negligee, she approached me. I put my book aside and she lay down next to me. Her body was soft and trembling. I knew the passion that was raging inside her as she kissed me on the side of my neck just below my right ear and her hand slid down and through the fly of my pajamas.
"The book dropped quickly to the floor as my cock responded to her touch. It got hard immediately. She ran her fingers up and down its length as its instantaneous growth forced it through the opening. Simone slipped off her negligee and sat there doubled over on the edge of the bed teasing my eager tool. I ran my trembling hand up and down her smooth back, my fingertips feeling the excitement rise in her body.
"She shifted position in such a way that her pussy was right alongside my face. She then raised herself onto one elbow and, darting her head down with a swift motion, began sucking on my cock. She went down only an inch or so the first time. Taking her mouth from it, she looked up at me and smiled. She knew that I wanted it and wanted it badly, but she was in a mood to tease me. She went down again, this time a little farther and it was driving me crazy.
"After a few minutes, I couldn't take the 'teasing' anymore and I speeded things up by grabbing her golden tresses and pushing her head down to my belly. She took the whole scene in stride. Her lips descended right down into my bush of pubic hair. My cock was so far down her throat that it started to bend-at least it felt like it was bending. She didn't choke or gag. She wriggled her head and the sensation was so great that it was all I could do to keep from coming right then.
"As I fought back the urge to ejaculate I noticed her legs start to part. Her beautiful snatch was about a half-inch from my nose. Simone did not have a great amount of pubic hair so the pinkness of her vulva showed through-enticing me. Those precious lips were moist with love dew and looked delectable. I kissed those lovely lips and let my tongue slide in between them. As I agitated her clit with my probing tongue, she shivered with excitement and sucked harder on my cock. We rocked back and forth in this sixty-nine position with such strenuous movements that it was a miracle we didn't roll off the bed.
"I could feel my cock swelling to its greatest capacity. The head of it was so big and gorged with blood that Simone could hardly keep it in her mouth. Every so often her teeth would scrape it and the pain was like being stung with a thousand bee-stingers. But, it was so exhilarating that I could only moan into her wet pussy. I felt her vagina contract around my tongue, caressing it like it were a small erect penis. She was having trouble catching her breath so I knew at any moment she was going to achieve orgasm. Simone, in orgasm, was something absolutely fantastic. Her whole being responded to nature's most gratifying gift.
"First her body went rigid and she would throw her head back, eyes tightly screwed shut. Her mouth would be wide open, forming a perfect oval. Her cheeks would be flushed and her fingers would dig deep into whatever part of my anatomy she was clinging to. Her chest would heave as she sucked in tremendous amounts of air and she would start to wail-softly at first and then expand slowly to a full crescendo. It was a chilling experience to hear this almost inhuman sound emit from her throat.
"I knew that this was about to happen once again so I pulled my face from underneath her and attempted to change position so that I could mount her in the proper way. I wanted to share in this jubilation. She let go of my cock with a loud popping noise and rolled over on her back, crossways on the bed, spreading her legs apart quickly. I thrust my cock home as soon as I was in the proper position to do so. It felt so good to slide it between those lovely moist lips. I managed to shove it back and forth a few times before she began her climax.
"I was pumping and she was humping in perfect harmony as she started her long 'arpeggio.' I shot my load and it seemed that a ton of scalding hot semen forged its way out of my aching cock and balls. She pushed up tightly against me, her back arching away from the sheets as I pressed hard against her pelvis. It seemed as if she was sucking me dry. Her vagina, contracting tightly around my cock, finished the last massive thrust.
"She stopped moaning and her whole body relaxed as I started to pull out and climb off. 'Daddy! Don't!' she sobbed. 'Leave it in just for a while.'
"I let my tired cock remain where it was and we shifted onto our sides where we could be more comfortable. This also enabled me to take my tremendous weight off of her. I weigh in excess of 200 pounds and Simone is only five feet two and probably doesn't weigh more than one hundred and five, at the most.
"We lay there, quietly locked in one another's arms for about twenty minutes. My cock had grown very soft and shriveled by this time, but Simone's vaginal area was still warm and moist. Every so often she would press up against me and I would get a slight tingle as her vaginal lips touched my sensitive head. 'Daddy?' Simone was looking into my eyes as she asked me this question: 'Would you put your cock into my rectum?'
"I was shocked at this query. I replied with dismay that I was surprised that she would utter or even contemplate such an unnatural request. But, in thinking about it-it did seem like an exciting thing to do-it was the one place I had not been. Seemingly able to read my thoughts, Simone freed herself from my embrace and leaped out of bed and ran into the bathroom. Within seconds she had returned with a jar of petroleum jelly. Hurriedly twisting off the lid, she dug her slender fingers into the jar, scooping up a large gob of the lubricant. Her hand was so hot that the jelly was quite warm by the time she applied it to my cock, which was beginning to get erect again.
"Once the jelly was liberally spread over the head and shaft of my stiff cock, Simone lay down alongside me and backed her butt up to my hip. I turned on my side and gently guided my cock between the cheeks of her ass with trembling fingers.
"At the entrance to her bunghole, my first exploratory thrust was brought to an abrupt halt. It felt like my cock had rammed into a brick wall. 'I'm sorry, Daddy,' Simone said in a regretful tone of voice. 'I guess I am a little tense.' I tried it once more and this time her rectum opened up enough to allow some of the head in. It was tremendously thrilling. With her help, and a little time, I finally had my cock wedged deep in her shit shaft, at least as deep as her fat little buttocks would allow.
"God, was she tight! No vagina in the world could be as tight as my daughter's ass-hole. I could tell by the way she was reacting that she was thoroughly enjoying this excursion into new sexual joys. I began to shove it in and out. Carefully, so as not to dislodge my precarious position I increased the thrusting movement. The petroleum jelly was a great help since the vaginal lubricants were missing in this area.
"I reached my arm slowly around her tiny waist and, groping downwards, I found the entrance to her pussy. I agitated the lips of her vulva and the tiny clitoris that popped up in response to my probing. Simone was sighing with delirious pleasure. She said it felt like she were being fucked 'twice at the same time!'
"We were both getting excited. It was all I could do to keep from coming prematurely. Simone was reveling in complete ecstasy and I was feeling pretty wonderful myself. Her rectal tube was completely relaxed ind my prick was sliding in and out with complete freedom.
"Simone started to get rigid once again. I knew she was building up to a tremendous orgasm. My hand was agitation-plus in her sloppy-wet pussy and I thrust into her backside with all my force. Simone started to moan-it was almost a scream this time.
"My sperm surged forth with force I would have thought myself incapable of. It roared into her ass-hole like a gushing flood. Perhaps the roar I was hearing was just my imagination, for I felt that a massive tidal wave was sweeping over me. I could barely catch my breath.
"I took my hand out of Simone's cunt, for it was all I could do to hang on. She was wriggling in sheer ecstasy. I had hold of her tightly about the waist. She was backing her butt up to me with all her strength and I was pushing my surging dick into her with all the power I could amass. I was dizzy with the thrill of it all. She kept contracting her sphincter muscle with all her might. The muscular control there in the anal area was vastly superior to the vaginal counterpart.
"By the time our mutual orgasm had subsided, we were covered with sweat. But we both felt deliciously wonderful. I started to go soft and Simone released me from my happy prison.
My cock slid out with a slurping sound and lay sticky and dead-like against the inner part of my thigh. I looked down at it; my poor old cock was very red and very sore.
"I rolled over on my back and Simone cuddled next to me, resting her head on my shoulder. Everything was still fuzzy around me and I did not want to break the beautiful silence with some banality. I felt too damn good. Simone remained silent also. She lay there, with her eyes closed and ran her finger around my left nipple. It tickled but failed to arouse me at all.
"I lay there, one arm behind my neck, the other around Simone, who was sleeping like an innocent child. I contemplated my sore cock; it had been where no other cock had been before. I was delighted with my smug feeling of lustful triumph. I felt like I owned a part of Simone-and would own it-forever. It was a good feeling and I was enjoying every second of it. I wondered if Simone's anus hurt as much as my cock did.
"She looked beautiful lying there, cradled in my protective grasp. The sweat on her body was drying now in the cool night air and tiny goose-bumps appeared on her flesh. I felt I should get up and close the window or at least pull the blankets up over us, but I didn't dare move as I dreaded being distracted from the wonderful feeling that I had. I looked at her lovely breasts. The nipples were still somewhat distended. They looked like the proverbial pink, ripe and succulent strawberries. I removed my arm from behind my head and reached down and caressed one of them. Simone stirred gently, a slight smile on her face as she turned and snuggled closer to me and, at the same time, extended a hand down to my cock. The coolness of her palm and fingers coming in contact with it was very soothing. I soon found myself drifting off into a restful and trouble-free sleep.
"I awoke from a wildly erotic dream to find Simone jacking me off. I was fully erect and ready for action as she moved into a suitable position for fellatio. I was all for this. I went rigid with excitement as her warm moist lips surrounded my eager organ and with each descent my excitement increased. Her head was bobbing up and down at a fantastic rate, her golden curls flouncing around her head like a vibrating halo.
"Simone's hair was hanging down in front of her eyes and I couldn't see her face. I reached down and, with stroking motions, brushed the hair back from her face. The sight was delightful to behold. Her lips, so pink and natural without lipstick, formed a perfect oval around my cock. The small globs of saliva glistened in the morning sunlight as they dripped from the corners of her mouth. Eyes shut, she was almost frowning with her abject concentration. She was working on me like a piston within a cylinder. I wanted to blow my nuts in the worst possible way, but I decided to hold back for a little while longer in order to properly relish this delightful and most gratifying experience.
"She tried something new this time. At the very second that I felt I could no longer restrain myself, she would instinctively slow down and I would relax a bit and let the 'ejaculation urge' subside within me somewhat. We kept repeating this technique until I developed such a case of the 'stone aches' that I didn't dare hold back any longer. I shot my load with great force and relief. The hot sperm erupted into her mouth with such momentum that she almost gagged. But she kept on sucking until the last vestige was vacuumed from my cock. It felt like it would collapse inwardly. She greedily swallowed all of my ejection and rested her head on my heaving belly. 'Good morning, Daddy,' she said to me very sweetly, 'did you enjoy that?' I replied that I had, but not quite as much as I had enjoyed the experience on the evening before. 'We must try it more often,' she said. I answered that I would have some very special memories of Salzburg. She laughed and said, 'Yes, let us refer to this exciting analistic activity as "The Salzburg Variations." ' I joined her and we arose and got dressed for breakfast."
Before his suicide at the age of forty-eight, Hanns S-made a tape recording of his experiences which he submitted to a famous Viennese physician who was a close friend of his. The case history presented in this book is an excerpt from that tape recording and is presented verbatim from the pertinent segments. In the recording, Hanns tells his entire adult life's story, beginning with his marriage to Sheila.
At the age of twenty-three, Hanns, who was just beginning his promising operatic career, was presented with a baby daughter, Simone. He and his wife, Sheila, had been very happily married-so Hanns believed-and he was thrilled with the prospect of being a father to such a beautiful child. His ambitious striving for stardom in the opera world was doubled by the responsibility of this new member of the family.
Completely unaware of any lack of love between himself and the wife he adored, Hanns was stunned and incredulous when Sheila suddenly ran off with a Rumanian orchestra conductor, deserting him and taking their child with her. At this time, the child, Simone, was barely three years old, but it was obvious that, although she felt no love left for her husband, Sheila still cared for the child.
Shortly after Sheila, her baby and her lover reached Bucharest, they were involved in an automobile accident which proved fatal to both Sheila and her lover. The little girl, who had been in the back seat, suffered only minor injuries. Hanns, reading of the accident in the local newspaper, contacted the Rumanian authorities, and rushed to recover his beloved daughter, the only remaining vestige of his broken marriage.
Hanns, still very much in love with his wife's memory, tried to block out the fact that she had run off with another man. He grieved deeply and became extremely emotionally upset by her death. To him, her absence had been caused by death; there had never been a secret lover who had stolen her away from him. This short, but agonizing piece of his life, he pushed deep into his subconscious, acknowledging only Sheila's death. To Hanns, Sheila died his wife, the woman he worshiped and who loved him in return.
As Simone blossomed into lovely young womanhood, Hanns could not help but notice that she bore more than a little-likeness to his Sheila. In fact, as young Simone grew, the resemblance became more and more noticeable, until Hanns began believing that Simone was almost a reincarnation of his dead wife. As this striking-likeness became more and more evident, Hanns became increasingly jealous of his daughter, and his attitudes towards her turned to extreme overprotection.
Oddly enough, Simone found the fact that she was not permitted male companionship outside the home not in the least disagreeable with her. She had become completely devoted to her "poor widowed father" who remained a martyr in her eyes. She felt it was her duty to replace the woman who had meant the most in his life, and so she tried to become his wife in every way.
Although the incestuous relationship between Hanns and his daughter Simone may shock and revolt many of those members of the civilized society who read about it, incest has been with us for centuries as an unacceptable form of sexual behavior. As the sexual barriers of today's permissive society are continually giving way to forces of the new breed, it is possible to forecast a more general awareness and, tragically even, a tolerance of such sexual practices.
Although the act of incest is a crime in all fifty of the United States, the penalties for being convicted of this crime vary from state to state. So wide a variance is there in penalties for this crime, that in some of the fifty states the crime is on the books as merely a misdemeanor, while in other states it is classified as a felony with a penalty as great as twenty years to life.
Often stepparents, having had sexual relations with members of their spouse's family, have been indicted and/or convicted of incest even though they are not related to the incestuous partner by blood. The extent and import of the crime, as has already been stated, varies from state to state. In some states, to marry a cousin is illegal, while in other states the relationship is limited to immediate family only. There are a couple of states in which the laws against incest are so stringent that any blood tie at all is enough to constitute incest.
Children are usually the unwitting, though often willing, partners in most instances of incest. A child, feeling no sex guilt at an early age, may willingly participate in coitus or oral sex in an effort to please his parent, or possibly from fear of reprisals if he rebukes his parent's advances. Sigmund Freud's concept of "infantile sexualism" indicates that sexuality exists in the child and, therefore, it is indeed possible to develop this latent sex urge into overt action at just about any age or stage of sexual development.
Alfred C. Kinsey, in the same vein, states the following:
In most human cultures outside of our own, sex play starts, just as it does among the lower mammals, as soon as there is sufficient muscular coordination and any sort of social integration. Children as young as two or three may engage in some sort of play, and by five or six they may regularly engage in play which at least imitates coitus.
Much of the play may amount to nothing more than inter-femoral or inter-labial intercourse (placing the penis between the thighs or the genital lips of the female) but vaginal penetration can be effected by some boys. Sometimes this play receives encouragement from adults.
This is precisely what we have found among younger children of the more uninhibited segments of our own society. In some cultures pre-adolescent sex play continues without a break into adolescent and teen-age relationships. In other cultures there are social restrictions on the continuation of such play as adolescence approaches. In many primitive groups, and in some Asiatic and European groups including, for instance, some Mediterranean and Latin American groups, complete nudity and at least some open sex play may be allowed among younger pre-adolescent girls until they are five or six years of age.
There are curiously mixed attitudes in our own country concerning coitus. Religious and legal codes, the psychological and social sciences, psychiatric and other clinical theory, and public attitudes in general, agree in extolling heterosexual coitus as the most desirable, the most mature, and the socially most acceptable type of sexual activity. Simultaneously, however, the religious and legal codes and much clinical theory condemn such activity when it occurs outside of marriage and thereby to a greater extent than most persons ordinarily comprehend, negate all of these claims concerning the desirability of coitus. Such conflicting appraisals of similar if not identical acts often constitute a source of considerable disturbances in the psychosexual development of youth. These disturbances may have a far-reaching effect upon subsequent adjustments in marriage.
Let us now discuss a psychological problem which most psychoanalysts-and above all, Sigmund Freud, who first called the world's attention to it-have in the past, and still do to some extent, attach great importance to: the so-called Oedipus complex. This Oedipus complex is defined as a subconscious desire to "marry" the parent of the opposite sex, as well as an unrelenting jealousy of the parent of the same sex.
In the case of Simone, the Electra complex (the female equivalent to the Oedipus complex) seems to be in full play since her desires toward her father are quite evident. Simone may also have experienced a hatred toward her late mother for having deserted her father, who she felt deserved the love and fidelity of his wife. She might also have suffered a deep rejection and thus assumed a need for revenge against the woman who had left her alone to assume the responsibility of caring for her idolized male parent.
When Freud first put forth his theory, based on the ancient Greek play "Oedipus Rex," he drew an analogy between a son falling in love with and marrying his own mother, and all sons and mothers. Freud felt that there existed an unconscious desire within all people to hate the parent of the same sex and desire to possess" the parent of the opposite sex. This theory, first introduced to the world well over ninety years ago, was greeted with horror and disbelief by most of his contemporaries. Nevertheless, Freud further produced a more emphatic assertion of his doctrine. It was his belief that this Oedipus complex lay at the root of all primitive morality, and stated this in his Totem and Taboo. His theory was that guilt was the basis for religion and morality, and that this Oedipus complex is based on the concept that there is a strong and natural human tendency, appearing at a very early age, which causes individuals to have a sexual love for their own blood relations.
It was Freud's contention that this natural desire for incestuous relations can only be overcome by strict rules and regulations-and through oppression by society. In other words, by severe repression whether self-induced or otherwise. Most experts agree that the free exercise of incestuous impulses would be disastrous for any kind of family order. These learned experts have been battling about this for years. It is Westermarck's theory that there is a definite natural instinct averse to incest; Freud holds that there is from infancy a strong natural instinct toward incest. Malinowski doesn't accept the "aversion" to incest as natural, but claims that it is introduced by culture, "a complex scheme of cultural reactions."
Havelock Ellis surmises: "There is a sexual attraction towards persons with whom there is a close contact, such persons often being relations, and the attraction being therefore termed 'incestuous.'" This can be a comparatively weak attraction under normal conditions (exceptions noted) and, therefore, quickly overcome when a fascinating new object of desire from outside the family circle strikes the young beholder. In the case of Simone and her father Hanns, the exclusiveness of the opera world and the couple's mutual closeness, coupled with a complete lack of outside interests, created an atmosphere for incestual involvement.
There is no natural aversion to incest present in this case since Hanns and Simone felt sexual urgings which were inverted. In Hanns' narrative, we will explore in concise detail the history and repercussions of incest in an unusual family of the artistic class.
"I always held a great fear that someone who knew us might find out about the relationship that I was maintaining with my daughter. It was fear, not guilt, that prompted me to find a husband for Simone. No one knew anything for a fact-but there were backstage whisperings going on and I dreaded any scandal that would jeopardize my career-or hurt Simone. I was in a blissful state of existence. Simone and I were fucking just about every time we could arrange it. I did my level best to submerge my anxieties and accept life as it presented itself.
"The life that unfolded for us was a series of beautiful sex experiences, travel, excitement and companionship. Then we settled down for a long stay in Weisbaden where I was fortunate to obtain a contract for the whole opera season.
"I even started to teach. I had a pupil, a handsome and wealthy young American baritone who had come to Weisbaden to study. He seemed to be infatuated with Simone and I decided to cultivate this relationship, as he would present an ideal 'cover' and this would put an end to all these filthy rumors and gossip. Things went a little better than I had anticipated and Simone began to find him too interesting. But, I must say, when they came to me, together, and informed me that they wanted to marry-well, it was quite a shock. I managed to mask my emotions and give them my blessings, although I was just about dying inside. I consoled myself with the thought that this would fix those dirty minds around the opera house.
"And it worked, for all intents and purposes. The beautiful wedding was well covered by the European and American press. I looked like the happiest father-of-the-bride in the world. The way I felt on the inside was a totally different story.
"After the wedding reception, the couple stole away to their new apartment in order to leave for their honeymoon. By this time I was well oiled with champagne. Suddenly, I realized my horrible mistake! I grabbed the phone and called Simone, telling her I was desperately ill and needed her at once. She promised to come to me immediately.
"Within minutes, she was at my door, still dressed in her white wedding gown; she looked like an angel. I was burning with passion and jealousy. I wanted her. My groin was on fire and my cock wanted to burn its way through my pants. I knew that I had to have her, at least one more time before that young pup violated her on their wedding night.
"I seized her with all my brute strength and began to tear the wedding gown from her white shoulders. Her lovely breasts heaved into view, those gorgeous globes I had caressed on so many occasions, those delicious strawberry like nipples I had sucked and nibbled upon so many times with raw passion and lust. I smothered them with hot kisses like I had done hundreds and hundreds of times before. She started to protest and cried, 'No, Daddy! No!' But her voice sounded like someone far away. I paid her no heed as I bent her down to the floor without even realizing that she was scratching my face. I pushed the voluminous skirt up over her beautiful thighs and ripped the satin panties from her body. Her cunt, nestled in all that golden pubic hair I loved so much, lay there before me. It took less than an instant to inject my hot, eager penis into her reluctant slit.
"I wanted to come immediately but decided to hold off forever if need be. Simone was trying to free herself from my grasp, but to no avail. I held her tightly and continued to push my swollen cock further and further into her glorious cunt. In spite of her protests, I could feel her respond to my passionate fucking. I felt the muscles in her thighs relax for a millisecond and then tighten once again as she locked them around my heaving buttocks. Her breath quickened and the sobs were less frequent. I chuckled inwardly, fully aware now that she was enjoying this as much as I was.
"I shoved my aching cock in and out of that gorgeous golden-fringed vagina of hers. She was gyrating her hips in counter-rhythm to my own thrusting and heaving motions. I felt so good. I felt the sperm in my cock surge forward and struggle to free itself from its fleshy prison. I didn't know how long I could hold back, but I was trying with all my might to restrain myself. I was enjoying this more than I ever had before. Simone was now approaching orgasm-I could just 'feel' it. It would happen any second. As I gave a final gigantic lunge and began to shoot my load, Simone stiffened and arched her back, and began a slow moan which gradually crescendoed to a loud wail. Her mouth formed a perfect oval. I wished for a moment that I had two cocks, one for her mouth which looked so damned inviting.
"My sperm shot forth with a throbbing, burning sensation that accompanied it. I felt it burst from the tip of my cock and smash into her eager, sucking cunt. It filled her crevice as she let out a sigh of satisfaction and slumped in my arms. I thought for a moment that she had fainted, but the small smile on her lips showed me she was just enjoying the aftereffects.
"My cock was beginning to soften, so I pushed deeper inside. She pushed her pelvis hard against me in an effort to absorb every inch of my now relaxing penis. It felt wonderful. Her arms were wrapped tightly around my shoulders. We lay there on the floor in blissful silence. I thought to myself, Sheila! She is so much like Sheila! How can I let her go?
"A gentle knock on the door brought us out of our reverie. I got up off the floor and quickly dressed. Simone made a dash for the bathroom. The caller knocked again, this time a little louder and I heard her husband's voice. 'Just a minute,' I answered and, making sure I was acceptable in appearance, I proceeded to answer the door.
"As he entered the hallway, Simone came out of the bathroom. She looked radiant and very happy. She ran forward and threw her arms around her husband and planted a juicy kiss on his lips. I felt a twinge of jealousy course through my body. It isn't fair, I thought to myself, that I will have to share her with this, this baritone! But I smiled bravely and sent them on their way. Simone threw a conspiratorial wink over her shoulder as they entered the elevator.
"I watched the indicator of the elevator descend to G and then dashed back into my apartment. I looked quickly out the window and caught a glimpse of them entering the rear door of a big, black Mercedes-Benz. In a few short hours they would be in Venice and he would be enjoying the delight of that golden cunt. I felt sick inside. He had no right ... Sheila was my wife and Sheila had come back to me through Simone.
"The two weeks she was gone on her honeymoon was a period of acute agony for me. I went around with a perpetual hard on. I tried balling one of the girls from the chorus, but did a lousy job of it. It just wasn't the same. I wanted Simone. I knew she wanted me also and that made the separation all the harder to bear. I began to resent the guy she had married.
"The thought of her return was the only thing that sustained me during this period. I knew she would not desert her dear old father and that we would be together on many occasions. Nightly I have had delicious dreams of her glorious naked body standing there before me, beckoning me with arms outstretched. I would slide my aching and lonely prick between her throbbing, anxious thighs. My sheets were a mess, morning after morning, but I didn't care. Soon she would return-return in all her sensual splendor to me-her real love!
"They were due back on this certain day so I telephoned their apartment. The maid answered the phone and told me that they had not returned yet. That struck me odd as Simone was a creature of absolute punctuality. I tried every day for the next week but received the same answer, "They haven't returned yet-no, I have not been informed of any details concerning their return.' I was mystified.
"Then on a particular Sunday afternoon, I spotted them coming out of a restaurant in the Gartner Platz. I got held up by the crowd of people on the sidewalk and they hopped into a cab and sped away before I could call to them. It suddenly dawned on me that they had been back and had purposely been avoiding me. I was hurt and concerned.
"The following morning I called their residence and, refusing to be put off by the maid, demanded to speak to Simone. After a waiting period that seemed like hours, she came to the phone. Her voice sounded warm and friendly yet strangely different. I told her how much I had missed her and that I was at a total loss as to why she hadn't informed me of their return from Venice. I asked if I could come over and see her. She said that her husband had gone to Stuttgart for a guest appearance with the opera there and wouldn't return till late that night. She was a bit hesitant in replying to my request but finally asked me to join her for a late supper. The tone of her voice was strange and unnatural, and I was perplexed.
"Riding over to her place in the taxi, my mind was filled with erotic daydreams. How I longed for her sacred white body and that lovely cunt that was nestled amongst those hairs of spun gold. My prick ached with longing for the moist insides of that miraculous organ. In fact, by the time the taxi arrived at her door I had achieved an enormous erection that forced me to almost bend double to avoid displaying it through my pants to the group of dowagers lounging about the lobby of Simone's building.
"The elevator ride up to her floor was the longest elevator ride of my life. I was in rapture anticipating our reunion. I knew she was longing for me, too. The fact that my son-in-law was out of town just suited me fine. I knocked at the door and Simone answered it promptly. She was wearing a lovely pink dress. Her breasts looked marvelous and the cleavage excited me immensely. She said, 'Hi, Daddy,' and I threw my arms tightly about her and drew her firmly against me. She felt the hardness of my prick as I held her tightly to me. For an instant, I thought I felt her stiffen and slightly recoil from my passionate embrace. I was sure that I was wrong. I was positive that she was longing for my familiar prick inside her as much as I was wanting it there. She gently freed herself from my intense grip and we walked into the dining room. A delightful little supper complete with champagne was laid out before us. As we ate I found it difficult to respond to the delightful tales she was telling me about her honeymoon. I could've cared less what happened between them. AH I thought about was burying my face between those marvelous breasts and shoving my aching prick up her wonderful slit.
"We finished off dinner with a strawberry par-fait and I got sexually excited just watching the gobs of whipped cream seductively entering her mouth via the tiny silver dessert spoon. I wished that it were gobs of my own semen.
"After we left the table, Simone retreated to her boudoir to freshen up. I followed her. She was standing in front of her dressing table applying fresh lipstick as I walked up behind her and reached my arms about her, seizing a voluptuous breast firmly in each hand. She relaxed for a brief second and started to half sigh and then suddenly pulled away from me a bit.
"I asked, 'What's the matter, darling?'
"She said, 'Nothing, Daddy, I'm really not in the mood.'
"This was a strange thing for her to say to me, as Simone was always ready for me at the drop of a zipper. By this time I was in a sexual frenzy. I wanted her so badly that my erect penis was already dripping drops of hot sperm. She turned around to replace the lipstick on the dresser and I placed my arm around her waist, picked her up bodily and tossed her onto the bed. Before she could recover, I had slipped out of my trousers and undershorts and had dived on top of her. like I had done a hundred or more times before, I pushed her skirt up above her unyielding thighs and clumsily removed her panties. She was sobbing and crying out, 'Daddy, please don't! Please, oh, please, don't do it!' I smothered out her cry of protest with my shoulder, putting all my weight down upon her as I maneuvered my hips between her legs.
My prick was surging with hot desire as I violently shoved it into her tight vagina. She let out a cry of pain as I plunged it brutally, with tremendous force. It felt so good. Simone sank her teeth deep into my shoulder muscle, but in my mad pleasure I did not even let it bother me. I was so happy, being once again in that well of delight and happiness-Simone's cunt.
"As soon as I started to agitate my hard prick within her vaginal walls, Simone stopped struggling and I felt her coyly push her pelvis upwards to meet each passionate thrust of my joystick. She was beginning to enjoy it. It was at this moment that a particular thought disturbed me. Why was she so reluctant to engage in intercourse with me now? The only thing that had changed was that she had this oaf of a husband. We both had considered the purpose of this 'arranged' marriage, and had agreed that for all intents and purposes it was to stop the ugly rumors that were spreading from opera house to opera house about our relationship. As far as the outsiders knew they were just rumors, and we always managed to be quite discreet. Something must have happened on her honeymoon. I couldn't imagine what it was, but, whatever caused this change of feeling in Simone, I didn't like and I was worried.
"All these thoughts flashed through my mind while I was fucking Simone like the very devil. I felt so warm and comfortable inside of her. It was like Sheila. Oh! How much she was like Sheila!
"Simone was really beginning to writhe with pleasure. Her mouth was half open in that sweet-satisfied smile that always appeared prior to a delightfully anticipated orgasm. I was so happy that I was the one who was providing the rapturous experience. I was pumping madly, and the feeling that I was getting literally tickled my ass-hole. The sides of my prick were hot with the continuing friction and I could feel the head of it swelling to immensity.
"God, that girl knew how to fuck! She was pushing into me with determination as every thrust hit home. I knew I was going to explode gobs and gobs of white, creamy, hot sperm in the very next minute. I held off as long as I could since the sensation was so wonderful-and it had been so very, very long since last I had indulged in this most sublime experience, "She arched her back in one large and final convulsion that almost lifted me into the air. I shot my fiery load into her with a mighty thrust that made my head swim. We were both a mass of sweat as we clung tightly to one another, almost swooning with delightful pleasure and release. This is the way it should be, I thought.
"She had recovered her breath and was kissing my neck ever so lovingly and occasionally taking a playful nip at my ear. "That was nice,' she purred. 'Can I have some more later?'
"I knew it would take some time before I could muster up enough strength to accomplish a satisfactory repeat performance, so I suggested that we open another bottle of champagne. God! It was like old times. I was deliriously happy as I walked into the kitchen to remove another bottle from the refrigerator.
"A few seconds later, I had returned to the bedroom with a glass of the icy bubbly in each hand. I sat down on the edge of the bed and handed one of the glasses to Simone. She raised up on one elbow and took the glass to her lips. She looked absolutely beautiful. Her lovely breasts with the cantaloupe-colored nipples hung down just a bit. At that angle they were in quarter profile and I could see that the tips of the nipples were still distended. I licked my lips as I felt the desire to kiss them once again come over me.
"I bent down and let my lips encompass them, whirling my tongue slowly around the circumference. I felt Simone stiffen just a bit. She was still in a state of sexual arousal. I felt her body start to recline on the bed and heard the sound of her glass clink against the marble top of the bed stand. I switched to the other nipple. Simone was humming with pleasure. She spread her legs wide and started rubbing her vaginal area with her hand. She was getting very sexy and I knew that she wanted it again. But, I wasn't up to it as yet. I pushed her hand away with my own and allowed my fingers to enter her slit. It was warm, moist and sticky with our combined juices. It felt good and that was all that mattered. I continued sucking and tickling her nipples and she was moaning with sheer pleasure. This was the way it used to be, and there was no reason why it shouldn't continue.
"I was in for a bit of a shock, though. I ache inside even now when I think of those few words that shattered my happy world completely.
" 'I hope you are really enjoying this, Daddy, for this will be the last time we will ever be together like this.' I was thunderstruck, the words I was hearing shot through me with the stab of an icicle.
"I asked her to clarify the words I had just heard. My almost erect cock had withered away again. She carefully explained, in words that I would refuse to understand, that we would no longer be lovers and that we would never meet again, except socially.
" 'Is it because of your husband? Does he suspect?' I thundered these questions at her.
" 'No,' she replied. 'It's just that things are not the same anymore. I allowed you to enter me for old times sake, and-because I love you. But, I only love you as my father now. I feel very guilty about our relationship. I have done a lot of thinking, and now that I have a husband-'
" 'Enough!' I cried in rage. Before I had realized it, I was on top of her, straddling her with my naked legs, my cock and balls laid out across her heaving breasts. I was striking at her face with my fists. I had to stop those words from pouring out of her mouth. Not my Sheila! I would not let her leave me for someone else-no! Not again. I heard her voice sob out between my rain of blows.
" 'I'm not Sheila, I'm not Sheila, I'm Simone-I'm not MOTHER!'
"I stopped my flailing fists in mid-air and then felt something strike against the side of my head. I lost consciousness.
"When I came to a few minutes later I was still on the bed, my head resting against a blood-soaked pillow. I looked around for Simone; she was still in the room, standing at the foot of the bed, standing by her husband, crying softly into his shoulder. He had one arm wrapped around her, and though he gripped her tightly, it was trembling. In the other he held a slightly bloodied brass candlestick.
"Suddenly, it dawned on me! She loved him! My beloved loved him! No more would we know such moments of erotic bliss. No more would I know the experience of warm, loving lips pressed against mine. No more would I enjoy plunging my flaming prick into that beautiful slit. That slit that was the answer to all my dreams of loneliness since Sheila went away. She would never come to me again. I was alone again-so goddamn alone. I hadn't lost her-I had given her away. I watched them slowly and sadly walk out of the bedroom and out of my life."
Hanns' confusion and inability to differentiate between Sheila and Simone posed a peculiar problem. In the beginning, owing to his intense loneliness, he was able to fantasize his daughter as Sheila. As Simone grew into young womanhood and developed into almost a reincarnation of her late mother, her father developed a strong sexual desire for her. When his senses were numbed by drink, this strong subconscious urge resolved itself into action. The fact that Simone was responsive and quite willing to engage in and even encourage this incest makes us a bit curious about her underlying motivations. Being the daughter of a fairly famous personage, she was exposed to women of all types who were willing to throw themselves at her father's feet, much less his bedroom door. Naturally, she probably felt the bitter pangs of jealousy.
None of the young men she knew or grew up with could match her father for charm or virility or fame. Many a pre-adolescent daughter has said, "When I grow up, I'm going to marry Daddy!" But this feeling usually stops at the age of eight or nine years. Simone carried it throughout adolescence, and it got out of control. When Simone matured enough to look around for a sex partner of an unrelated type, close to her own age, she no longer desired her paternal image.
Little more is known about Simone. Unfortunately, her marriage did not work out and, within three years after her father's death, she divorced her husbnd and drifted into obscurity.
CHAPTER TWO
Two For One ... Is Good Odds
"Millie lay close to me. The voluptuous curve or her warm buttocks pressed close against my pelvis. The touch of her hot flesh against my prick caused it to get hard immediately. My lips were pressed against the back of her neck. It was sweaty and the saltiness of the drippings stung my tongue and aroused me to even greater heights of sexual ecstasy.
"My hard rod was moving into the crevice of her ass. As the head of it brushed against her rectum, I felt it tighten in a defensive reflex action. I shivered with delight. The head of my probing penis had reached the entrance to her moist little cunt. Her pubic hairs were like small wires, almost like tiny electrical filaments that transferred minute shocks to my eager and anxious prick.
"Millie spread her legs instinctively, though she was still asleep. My prick entered her vagina, slowly at first and, as the warm walls surrounded it, plunged fiercely into the remaining cavity. She gave a start as my tool banged against the tip of her womb. Her hand slipped down and patted my ass reassuringly. I knew, once again, that I was very, very welcome. She then pressed her buttocks tightly against me and began to gyrate her hips. I reached my arms up under her armpits and clung to her shoulders. I felt the blood surging into my penis and the sperm struggling to rise from its mysterious reservoir.
"She was becoming fully aroused and the rapidity with which she manipulated her glory hole was tremendously exciting. It was all I could do to keep from ejaculating right then and there. But I knew that Millie would be terribly disappointed if I left her hung up. She did, for a fact, get extremely ugly the last time I went off a bit prematurely.
"I could feel her breasts pressing against the insides of my forearms as her breathing accelerated. I buried my face into her hair and gently bit the back of her neck. She began to writhe frantically with pleasure. Both our bodies were covered with sweat and it was insufferably hot under the blanket. I managed to kick the blankets off and, in doing so, uncovered Monica who was sleeping to the other side of me. She muttered something about it being cold and drifted back to sleep.
"I was plunging wildly into Millie's luscious cunt. I could feel the head of my cock swelling. Oh God, how I wanted to come! I couldn't hold it back any longer and with a moan, I released the hot stuff into Millie's hungry, pink pit. Millie went rigid for a brief second and seized my hands in hers. I knew that she had reached complete and satisfactory orgasm at that instant. I had an immediate sense of well-being.
"My hot tool was spurting like a runaway fire hose. Millie pushed her butt tight up against me with one final spasm of ecstasy. I felt a slight burning sensation as I shot the final drop of semen into her. She contracted her vaginal muscles which sent shock waves through my body from my quickly softening prick. With each contraction I jumped a bit, which disturbed the sleeping Monica. 'Oh, Dad,' she muttered with a discomforting tone to her voice, lie still. I can't sleep with you jumping about like that.' Monica is Millie's identical twin. They look so very much alike that I can never really tell them apart, which sometimes causes me a problem.
"My prick slid out of Millie's crack. It was still semi-hard, but I was in no shape whatsoever to continue. I rolled over onto my other side and reached over Monica to the nightstand and grabbed my cigarettes and lighter. I lit the cigarette and took a deep drag. Millie was snuggled close to me, her head buried in my armpit. Monica was lying close to me, also. Monica looked like she was asleep, but, I somehow thought different. The moonlight was bright and I could see her features outlined very distinctly in the dimness. Her eyelashes occasionally fluttered. My suspicions were fully justified; she was completely awake and only feigning slumber. She probably was a silent witness to her sister's recent sexual activity.
"I turned my head until I was facing her. She looked so very beautiful, the silver moonlight reflected on her face. In many ways, she was much more beautiful than her sister Millie. Their personalities were quite the opposite, also. Millie was a bit of a 'hoyden', while Monica was very sophisticated and outwardly more sensuous. Indulging in a mischievous impulse, I sucked in a mouthful of smoke and blew it into her face. The reaction was instant! Monica bolted to an upright position, coughing and sputtering. Then we both laughed.
" 'You imp,' I said, 'you were awake all the time.'
"She giggled. 'I got so horny lying there, listening to you two fucking away so happily, I was hoping you'd be able to save some for me. But, from the way you groaned, Timagine that you are completely spent?'
"I replied, 'Almost,' and chuckled.
"Monica said, T bet I can get you hard again.'
"I was intrigued and took up her challenge. Throwing back the bedclothes, I exposed my nude body to her lecherous eyes. She lifted herself on one elbow and pressed her head close to my chest and let her moist tongue dart in and out as she moved stealthily over every ticklish spot on my torso. I felt a tremor of response from my genital area but I knew damned well that she would have to do a lot more to get me aroused enough to shoot off another load.
"Her nose was brushing against my pubic hair and the feeling that I sensed from her warm breath against my still wet cock was exhilarating. She took my tired tool between her long, slim fingers and, stretching it out, gently allowed her lips to encompass it. I was beginning to respond. The warmth of her wet lips around it made me tingle all over. God, I thought to myself, how lucky can a guy get?
"By then, I was quite hard and any second I would be ejaculating my last reserve of hot sperm into that lovely little mouth of hers. I could feel myself coming already. I stiffened my body as I thrust my hips upward so that all my cock would be in her mouth as I shot my load. As I raised up off of the bed, Monica's hands grabbed me by the buttocks and held me in position as the hot, creamy goo shot into her oral orifice. I moaned with pleasure as she made those delicious gulping sounds. Monica liked sucking cocks more than anything and I would have been the last one in the world to object.
"I was sure that she had reached orgasm during this act, as she was breathing very hard at my climax. She lowered my buttocks back to the bedsheet and collapsed with her lips still around my shrinking cock. She had swallowed every last drop of sperm.
"I could see that Monica was exhausted and would soon be in a deep satisfied slumber like her sister Millie. I was also pretty pooped after this double-header and longed for the quiet solitude of my own bed. I quietly arose and, tiptoeing out of the bedroom and down the hall, entered my own bedroom and, sliding very quietly between the sheets, settled down for a satisfied night's sleep. In doing this, I was very careful not to wake the wife.
"Marge stirred her gross and repugnant body as I so quietly settled down next to her. Oh, how I wished we had had twin beds, but that would have lost me the whole kettle of fish. I just hoped with all that I had in me that she wouldn't get sexy as she sometimes did late at night. I had not stuck my prick in her for almost three weeks. It was getting more difficult to have sexual relations with her, especially since I'd been fooling around with those two Venuses down the hall. Besides, Marge was fat and ugly and her breath perpetually smelled of gin.
"I turned my back to her and quickly dropped off to sleep with visions of voluptuous sex dancing through my head. I was beat but I surely felt magnificent.
"The next morning, I hummed with happy satisfaction as I took the 8:40 to the city. I was still humming up to the moment that my secretary informed me that J. M. wanted to see me in his office. J. M. was Marge's father, the president of the agency and my boss! He was a nice guy and a smart businessman; so smart, in fact, that he had conned me into marrying his fat, widowed daughter in return for a vice-presidency in the firm, a home in Westchester and $45,000 a year. In the beginning, I had thought that I had made the coup of the century. Now I would be willing to trade the whole mess for an office boy's salary-except for a couple of things-Millie and Monica, my two over-sexed stepchildren who were the saving grace.
"What J. M. had to tell me came as a shock. I was being transferred to Los Angeles to try to save a failing situation with the agency's branch there. I couldn't very well refuse and the thought of getting away from Marge was certainly a pleasant one, but I couldn't bear the idea of leaving the girls. It certainly was an anguishing situation. I downed quite a few martinis in the club car on the way home that evening. Then I had a marvelous idea-why not take the girls with me? I was sure they'd enjoy a trip to the coast. Then I nixed it; Marge would want to come, too. 'Well,' I said gulping down the last martini as the train slowed to a stop at my station, 'I will certainly think of something.'
"Monica thought of it for me. She had always been interested in the theater and, to her, Los Angeles meant H*0*L*L*Y*W*0*0*D! and she saw that this was the perfect way to get launched as a movie starlet. She suggested coming out to the coast with me and said that she would be of so much use to me-hostessing formal dinners, maintaining the apartment and other things that, of course, we could not mention to Marge. Monica's enthusiasm broke down her mother's reluctance and, a week later, United Flight No. 344 carried a very happy couple to the City of the Angels.
"The agency had leased a lovely two-bedroom apartment on Wilshire Boulevard for us. When Kearns, the manager, showed us through the unit he expressed great pride in the layout. Monica expressed great delight in what was to be her room, but inwardly we felt very smug in the inner knowledge that we both carried-there would be very little sleeping done in it, unless we desired a change of scene.
"So we quickly settled into our nice, new environment and it was just delightful. It was such a great relief not to have to return to my wife's unhappy bed every morning. Monica enjoyed it, too. She mentioned, and I hadn't noticed until then, that she resented having to share me with Millie; so we had a beautiful sexual ball.
"One late afternoon when we had returned from a delightful day at the beach, I was feeling quite horny after watching Monica running around the beach in a mini-bikini, followed her into the shower. She looked magnificent. The suds were running down over her well-tanned body. Little rivulets of the soapy stuff was coursing down the cleavage of her gorgeous breasts and collecting in the bush of pubic hair that covered her sweet little cunt.
"Quickly stripping off my trunks, I jumped in the shower with her and, grabbing a washcloth, began washing her back. She responded by pushing her buttocks into my groin. That gesture made my cock begin to stiffen immediately. Suddenly, she turned around and, dropping down on her knees, seized the washcloth from my trembling hand and began to wash my cock and balls. The sensation was really something! After getting it thoroughly soapy, she moved back and allowed the shower spray to rinse it completely. Then, taking it gently in one delicate hand, she began to suck on it slowly at first, but gradually increasing tempo until I thought I would blow right there.
"If you could imagine the thrill of the whole act being done in that steamy shower-Monica's golden body glistening with streams of silvery water cascading down and her head bobbing rhythmically as she hungrily devoured my throbbing cock. Her nipples were distended and pressed against the front of my thighs which caused me even more excitement. I was unable to hold back ejaculation any longer and I let the hot sperm burn its way out of its prison and shoot with great passion into that gentle mouth. Monica tensed for just an instant as the hot stuff surged into her mouth, almost gagging her. My darling didn't even miss a stroke, though, and she sucked out every drop. My knees became very weak after this and I had to hold onto the shower faucet handles in order not to collapse.
"Monica spit out the gobs and gobs of sperm and we both watched the spray force them, like tiny white snakes, through the holes in the metal drain in the stall floor. We stepped out of the shower and dried each other briskly. We both felt very happy. As soon as we were dry, I picked her up and carried her to the bed, where I carefully laid her down on the crisp lavender sheets. She looked so beautiful, lying there with her legs spread apart, the golden fluffy hairs of her cunt glistening in the light of the setting sun. I felt my tongue and lips quiver with excitement as I contemplated cunnilingus with that heavenly genital.
"I lay down at the foot of the bed and inched my way up towards her until my face was just above her crotch. She reached down and placed both hands on the back of my head and gently, but firmly, pushed my face into her golden bush. It smelled so clean and fresh.
"It tasted even better. As I slid my eager tongue in between those delicious cunt lips, she writhed with pleasure. I felt her back raise from the sheets as she drew close to orgasm. My cock had been sucked dry, just a few moments before, but it stirred once again in response to the erotic stimulation I was receiving. I darted my tongue back and forth with fierce motions and she reached climax within seconds. Her fingers gripped my hair and I thought she would tear it out by the roots. I wanted to yelp, but in order to do so I would have had to stop sucking that magnificent vagina. So, bravely I persevered and continued the stimulation that was driving Monica wild with ecstasy.
"That's just about the way my sex life with Monica went during the first few months out in sunny California. Monica wasn't the only chick that I balled, but, in the homestretch, she certainly was the best of them all. You see, the girls of Hollywood are in a class by themselves. Very few of them have the outward sophistication of their New York sisters.
"Monica had met Valerie in one of the casting offices. like Monica, she was an aspiring actress. I had heard a lot about her from Monica, but didn't realize from her description that Valerie was the magnificent redhead that stood at our door early on a particular Saturday morning. Monica had gone shopping and I was lounging around in pajama bottoms with my first martini of the day, when the doorbell rang. I opened it and this absolute vision of loveliness was standing before my eyes.
"Quite naturally, I invited her in and asked her to sit down. I then hurried into the bedroom and slipped on a robe. Returning to the living room, I asked her if I could help her. She said that she had driven into town that day-she lived out in Simi Valley-and dropped by to see if my Monica would like to have lunch and see the fashion show at Bullock's. I told her that Monica was out but would return shortly and invited her to wait. I sat across from her, holding my martini in my hand and noticed that she was eyeing it hungrily. I asked her if she cared for one and she accepted. I went over to the bar and fixed her a very dry double. As I handed her the drink, I noticed that she was staring intently at my midsection. Glancing down, I embarrassedly noticed that my robe had come open and my fly was open also-and my big cock was hanging out in plain view. I covered up quickly but couldn't help but notice an amused grin flash across Valerie's beautiful face.
"When those delightful lips of Valerie's parted in that impish grin, my cock reacted just as if those lips had flown down and kissed it right upon its swelling head. I instantly became aroused. I hadn't had a strange piece of ass in months. I had a strange feeling that my guest was easily seducible. I could have been wrong, but it certainly was worth a try. I sat down alongside her on the sofa and 'accidentally' let my robe once again come open. My cock was now quite erect, and she obviously noticed it, but pretended to ignore it.
"I moved in as close as I could get to her, placing my arm behind her shoulders. She didn't move away from me or offer any resistance to my obvious move, so I bent my head over and gently kissed her behind the ear-she smelled of delightful perfume. She immediately hurled her head backwards so that I could allow my kisses to explore their way down the length of her neck and into the hollow of her shoulder. While doing this I could feel and hear the quickening of her breath; she responded quite quickly. With one movement she placed her empty glass on the table and then grasped my hard cock in her soft white hand. The effect of her touch on my burning sex organ caused me to bite hard into her shoulder. She didn't flinch or scream at the severity of my bite. In fact, she sort of sighed-excitedly.
"Before I could catch my breath, she had bent down to where her lips could encompass the swollen head of my aching cock. The coolness of her lips and tongue gave me quite a start. I quickly leaned forward and undid the belt of my robe. A quick shrug of my shoulders left me completely naked. It made quite a scene-me in complete nudity and Valerie-well dressed and dripping with expensive jewelry.
"I leaned back in complete ecstasy as she allowed her mouth to descend on my tool. Her hands, now free, rubbed my body with passionate pressure. She was enjoying performing the blow job as much as I was enjoying being blown. She increased the suction and agitation to such an extent that my feet were pounding the floor with the rhythm of a bongo player. I reached forward and placed my hands into the top of her dress. Valerie was not wearing a bra, much to my delight. In an instant my hands had cupped two deliciously firm breasts. I could feel the erect nipples pushing their way into the palms of my hands. Her breasts were already dripping with sweat. I knew that I must plunge my horny cock into that vagina, that must be full of erotic anticipation, very quickly. If I did not do it directly, I would waste a massive dose of come in her mouth. I wanted desperately to kiss those sucking lips as my hard cock shot the hot juice into the crevice that God in his infinite wisdom had ordained as the natural receptacle.
"I, in spite of my exultation accompanying ejaculation, was a bit disappointed at having shot my load into that lovely mouth. Just seconds before I was contemplating exploring the depths of that unknown orifice known as Valerie's vagina with my sensitive prod, and then, like some eager teenager, had wasted a lot of stored up sperm that certainly could have been preferably used elsewhere.
"I lay there, breathing hotly and feeling the sweat run off my face and down my neck. I wondered what to do next. Valerie solved that problem for me quickly. She raised up from my shrinking cock and kissed me with wide open mouth squarely on the lips, spitting my still warm sperm directly into my own mouth. I gagged and then retched, freeing myself from her tight grasp and fled to the bathroom.
"The tinkling sound of amused laughter followed me in my flight. That mischievous imp, I thought to myself. I could strangle her with my bare hands! By the time I had gargled and calmed down, all thoughts of violence had left me. While I was in the bathroom, Valerie had taken the opportunity to disrobe, and the vision of sheer naked loveliness that greeted me upon my return wiped away any feeling of animosity I may have previously entertained. She was extremely beautiful. Titian-haired and with skin like the finest ivory, she stood before me, holding out a fresh martini. 'I'm really sorry,' she cooed, 'I couldn't resist doing that. You looked so smugly satisfied.' I took the drink from her hand, all the time fixedly staring at a pair of the most magnificent breasts that I had ever beheld in all my forty years.
"Her waist couldn't have been any more than twenty-two inches in circumference. She looked exactly like a Gibson Girl sans corset. I almost gasped with delight. I would venture to guess that her bust and hip measurements were 38 and 36 inches, respectively; and she was a natural redhead for sure, as her curly pubic hairs matched exactly that which grew so abundantly above.
"Needless to say, by the time I downed my drink, I was raring to have a go at that delicious body. Valerie didn't need any coaxing, either. We flopped together in a mad tangle on the still unmade bed and, within seconds, my rigid cock was searching the moist, pink lining of her tight little cunt. It felt wonderful. My cock was still sensitive from the tremendous sucking that it had received shortly before and it responded to each tiny convulsion that occurred in the depths of Valerie's well of pleasure.
"Valerie was a moaner. Loud groans of delight poured from her sensuous lips during the progress of our frenzied copulation in such volume and excited pitch that I was sure the neighbors would think a grisly murder was occurring there. But I found out that the wealthy occupants of our building were a swinging and extremely cool group of people.
"I lunged deeper and deeper into her glory hole and I felt each vaginal convulsion increase as I built up the rhythm. She was quickly approaching orgasm. The moans decreased and finally became mute pantings. Her mouth was open. As she achieved climax, she dug her long fingernails into the flesh of my shoulders and arched her back. I gave a final great push forward and shot my load. Valerie sighed and held herself rigid as my hot cream surged into her. It felt wonderful.
"We lay there in each other's arms, enjoying the musky, sweaty closeness of our bodies until it suddenly dawned on me that Monica might be returning momentarily. I suggested that Valerie might want to take a quick shower or freshen up a bit. After several searching kisses, we parted and she disappeared into the bathroom as I hurriedly dressed and went into the kitchen to warm up the coffee.
"When Monica returned a few minutes later, with armfuls of groceries, she found two well-dressed individuals seated in the living room, making polite small talk and sipping coffee. As Monica sauntered into the kitchen to unload the groceries, she tossed a comment over her shoulder. 'You two getting to know each other by now?' I almost spewed my coffee. Valerie stuck her tongue out at me. After a few minutes Valerie left and Monica started lunch. As we sat at the table, I played with my food. I really wasn't very hungry. Monica looked at me with a worried expression. 'You look so awfully tired, darling. I think you should spend more time in bed on Saturday mornings.'
"Monica was spending more and more evenings away from home. This gave me more time to be with Valerie. She took to coming over two or three times a week. I am sure that Monica knew what was going on. Just how sure, I didn't find out until sometime later. Sex with Valerie was great fun, except a little bit of sadism lurked in her otherwise gentle nature. She was always trying out something new, like performing a bizarre version of analingus on my ass-hole. The sensation was terrific. And more than once I shot my load between those two gorgeous tits of hers."
The case of the twins, Millie and Monica, is an unusual one since the male parent is a stepfather, and more than one daughter is involved. It is also interesting to note that the stepfather rationalizes his extramarital incestuous sexual situation to suit his own standards of morality. Since there was an obvious sexual incompatibility with his wife whom he found sexually repulsive, the stepfather's thoughts turned to the charms of his two teen-aged stepdaughters.
We must also consider the morality of Millie and Monica in connection with this menage a trois. Both girls are quite lovely, young, and extremely responsive to their sexual yearnings. Their natural father died when they were about to enter adolescence, and a true father-daughter relationship was thwarted before it had strengthened in the teen years. The girls, accepting their relatively young-forty-and charming stepfather, grew jealous of their mother's possession of him. Out of feelings of envy, as well as from sexual drive, the girls entertained ideas of the seduction of their handsome stepfather.
Although it had not been mentioned in the text of the stepfather's narrative, Jerry M-, the subject, is very nearly an alcoholic, finding himself more and more dependent upon that one martini. The frequency of his martinis became quite alarming, but did not seem to encroach on his sexual abilities.
In Psychopathia Sexualis, Richard von Krafft-Ebing reports several cases of incest between fathers and daughters. In all but one, alcoholism was listed as a contributing factor. This is present in the Millie-Monica case. Whether alcohol or alcoholism is symptomatic of a deeper underlying pathology remains to be proven, and would be a fertile area for further scientific investigation.
In investigating the background of Jerry M-we find that he is the only child of a widowed mother. The mother, a devout church-goer, impressed on her son that sex was animalistic and dirty and that to be a "true image" of God, he should always dwell on purer subjects than those of a carnal nature. Following the natural resultant pattern, young Jerry devoured every sex encyclopedia, comic book, trashy novel and any other example within reach of his youthful fingers. The outcome was first an obsession about sex and, as he reached maturity, an obsession with sex. In fighting the guilt sense instilled in him from childhood, he created a mental block which allowed him to assume a guiltless attitude with regards to any sexual activity.
Monica, more so than Millie, presents evidence that she was afflicted with a mild nymphomania. Monica's desire to displace her mother in her new father's life is a common enough occurrence in cases where the seduction of the father is instigated by the daughter.
Krafft-Ebing cites several cases where a nymphomaniacal person initiated sexual relations with a blood kin:
Thoinot reports a case of a nymphomaniac (age 44) who made an attempt at suicide on account of unrequited love to her own son, 23 years old. She pestered him with kisses and caresses, tried one night to force him to coitus, which he refused. Other similar attempts followed with periodic spells of insanity. When all efforts failed she made an attempt on her own life....
Another case, reported by Tardieu, is still more horrible. A chronic nymphomaniac mother, apparently homosexual, often masturbated her little daughter, 12 years of age, for hours in the middle of the night, in the vagina and the anus. During that time she was highly excited.
It may, therefore, be assumed that the aggressor in most cases such as this is the nymphomaniacal partner, who is generally the instigator of these acts. It would be interesting to determine whether or not either Millie or Monica actually seduced the stepfather while he was in a drunken state. Until we delve further into the background of Jerry M-, this question may remain unanswered. What may be assumed is that the case, although it presents several classic aspects of incestuous behavior, is atypical in that nymphomania and alcoholism are representative syndromes underlying pathologies.
"Life went on quite pleasantly for a while, until my wife phoned long-distance from New
York and said that she missed me tremendously and was hopping a plane out to L.A. the following Friday. She also said that she was bringing Millie with her. This was a nice surprise, but I had to do some quick thinking about what to do with Valerie. The sexy redhead had been spending more nights with me than she had been spending in her own home.
"Monica had finally found out to just what extent Valerie and I had been carrying on and it didn't trouble her in the least. In fact, one evening when I had thought she was safely on her way up to Big Bear, she walked into my room and caught me fast in the saddle with Valerie. She giggled, immediately stripped for action and hopped in bed with us. I was so stimulated by this troisieme, that I fucked one then the other with fierce repetition for the rest of the night. Where I got the endurance, I don't know, but if a sperm transfusion were available, I would've paid any price for it. I balled till my cock was red and sore. When I didn't have it in one of their cunts, it was in one of their mouths. My tongue and lips were rather fatigued also by the end of the wonderful ordeal.
"I told Valerie that we'd have to play it cool while my wife was in town, which, of course, was all right with her. She even suggested that if things got too crowded, I could hide out at her place. Even though I was rather cold to the idea of Marge barging in unexpectedly, the delicious thought of having Millie around made my whole body tingle with anticipation.
"Even though Millie was Monica's physical duplicate, underneath they were no more alike than Laurel and Hardy. Monica was sensuous, serious, and very dramatic in erotic things, while Millie was sheer fun and delightful companionship before, during and after orgasm. That was why I was so delighted with the arrangement. It was like having an affair with one beautiful woman who had two distinct natures. That is why I was so seldom bored. A little on the side, like Valerie, just made me appreciate what I had all the more.
"Marge and Millie arrived late Friday night. Monica and I were at the airport to meet them. What a shock I received when they got off the plane. Marge looked wonderful! She had lost about forty pounds and was wearing a miniskirt that made her look fifteen years younger. Her hair was no longer graying, but had been returned to the soft brown I had seen in many old photographs.
"This wasn't fair, I thought, almost out loud. My wife looked so good that I almost wanted to fuck her!
"Marge ran up to me, threw her arms about my neck and kissed me fiercely and passionately.
"We quickly settled them into the apartment. Millie and Monica together and Marge in with me, of course. I couldn't get over the change in Marge. She told me that shortly after I had left she had discovered this new medical diet which literally melted the pounds off her. The diet was strict and included daily injections from her doctor. She said that the injections were a serum extracted from the urine of pregnant women. Well, whatever it was, it sure worked out fine. I was beginning to see the old gal differently.
"Millie wanted to go out and see Hollywood and the Sunset Strip at night and Marge encouraged Monica to take her. I tossed Monica the keys to my Jaguar Roadster, as I thought they would enjoy everything better from behind the wheel of an expensive sports car than in her little Ford Maverick.
"'Well!' I said, 'it's a delightful surprise to have you out here. And, honestly, Marge, I can't get over how wonderful you look! I didn't think anything could pry you away from your beloved Manhattan.'
"Marge smiled and pecked me on the cheek. I suddenly remembered that she did love me. She really looked good and I slowly felt that old repugnance fade away. It is funny how a person's physical appearance can affect you. I had felt that Marge had let herself go once she had 'hooked' me and had me signed, sealed, delivered-and paid for. But, this was a much younger, more voluptuous Marge than I had ever known. With me sitting next to her smelling the exotic perfume she had adorned herself with and looking into those beautiful made-up eyes, I felt a twinge of desire stir within me. I had not wanted the slightest physical contact with and looking into those beautiful made-up was getting aroused quite excitedly.
"Marge went on to tell me that she had lots of time to think while I had been gone and she came to the conclusion that if she didn't do something about herself, she would lose the love of her husband. Thus, the crash diet and the beauty treatments. I responded to this statement by embracing her and kissing her lovingly. As I did so, her hand dropped to my lap and brushed against my stiffened cock. She caught her breath quickly and then plunged her tongue deep into my mouth. The sensation caused the roof of my mouth to tickle something fierce and I rotated my lips on hers, which increased the mutual excitement. For the first time in months, I wanted to fuck the hell out of my own wife!
"Needless to say, we quickly stripped off our clothing and I picked her up and carried her into the bedroom. Her body looked so great, not an ounce of fat existed anymore. Her pubic hair, nesting in that slim groin looked almost like a strange pussy to me. As my cock entered it, I felt a thrill I hadn't known for years. I plunged in with fierce abandon.
"Marge took every inch of me into her with hungry delight. I felt her hips writhe underneath me and well understood how she needed this. I locked my hand on her shoulders from underneath her back and pulled her down towards me, all the while shoving with all the power I could summon from my lower extremities. My knees were smarting from the friction of the sheets against them.
"She was moaning with delight. 'Fuck me, fuck me! Oh, dear God in Heaven, fuck me! Fuck me!' She was squirming with great glee and passion as I gave one mighty lunge and shot my hot load deep into her well. She reached orgasm at exactly the same moment and, with a harmonic sigh, we collapsed on the bed, locked tightly in one another's sweaty arms.
"You'd think that I had it made, wouldn't you? Balling a wife who had had a complete overhaul, two gorgeous stepdaughters who couldn't get enough of me, plus an exotic redheaded movie actress who was the epitome of sexual adventurism. There is an old saying, 'You can't get too much of a good thing.' Well, let me tell you! I believed that and, for all intents and purposes, there was no reason on earth for me to doubt that, as long as I ate my Wheat-ies. But, my little world of sex shortly began to collapse around me in a most unusual fashion.
"Marge and Millie stayed for two weeks. I managed to get into Millie on several occasions, but finding the time and opportunity was difficult, since it was damn near impossible to get Marge out of bed, much less the house. She was so turned on that she even tried to play with my cock under the table at mealtimes, when we were driving somewhere or even at the theatre. I began to wonder if she was becoming a nymphomaniac.
"Monica was beginning to feel neglected also and took to staying out till the early morning hours. And I hadn't heard from Valerie for several days. Curious, I stopped by her apartment one evening.
"She answered the door after I had banged on it for several minutes. She displayed an expression of annoyance when she opened the door, finally. It faded quickly when she saw it was me. I stepped in and was just about to embrace her when I saw that we were not alone in the room. On the sofa sat a white-haired man in his early fifties. 'Jerry, I'd like you meet my agent, Howard R--. ' Displaying one of those smiles that could sell an electric vacuum cleaner to an igloo-dwelling Eskimo, Howie R--extended his hand. I was a little embarrassed; I realized that it would have been more tactful, if I had telephoned first. When Valerie introduced me by name, Howie looked thoughtful for an instant and asked me if I were any relation to Monica M--. I told him that she was my stepdaughter, and he smiled that salesman smile and said that he had great things planned for 'our Monica.'
" 'Just what do you mean-great things?' I asked, suspiciously.
" 'Oh, I secured her the lead in a movie that starts shooting in about two weeks!'
"I was surprised and pleased to hear this. Monica had been trying very hard to get started as an actress.
"What better way, I thought to myself, than to get the lead in the first picture you did. 'What's the name of the film?' I asked.
"Howie hesitated for a brief second and said, 'We haven't decided on the eventual title, yet.'
"Valerie interrupted, 'Don't worry, Jerry, she'll be getting $250.00 per day. They could call it "Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm" as far as I would be concerned for that kind of dough.' I had to agree, that was pretty good money for a beginner.
"Suddenly, our conversation was interrupted by a crashing sound from somewhere in the back of the apartment. Howie ran down the hall and I started automatically to follow, but Valerie blocked my way. I do not know what instinct made me do it, but I pushed her aside and followed Howie down the hallway. There was a tremendous light coming from the bedroom. I reached the door and looked in. There were several spotlights and some screens made out of what looked like aluminum foil that reflected the light from the spots. There were several people in the room. One of the men was operating a 16-mm camera. It was pointed at Valerie's king-sized bed.
"On the bed lay a couple, fucking away like mad. The man was about twenty-five, naked, and grunting with pleasure. The girl, lying underneath him with his large cock shoved into her cunt, was giving out with the most exaggerated moans of pleasure. The girl was beautiful and was also in the throes of an orgasm. The girl was Monica!
"Valerie had rushed up behind me. Howie was looking at me with a terrified expression. He surely thought I was going to tear the place apart. I didn't. I burst out laughing. It was funny, so damn funny that the tears began flowing from my eyes. Monica, my Monica from that oh-so-proper Westchester County family, was starring in stag films! What was even funnier was that the apartment-the apartment that I had been paying rent on for Valerie-was being used as a 'studio,' for this type of production. Throughout all this confusion, the camera and the actor just kept grinding away. Monica was looking at me wide-eyed.
"Everyone was looking at me like I was some kind of a nut. I calmly took out a cigarette, lit it, blew out the smoke slowly and turned to the chap I assumed was the director of this erotic epic and asked him if he minded terribly if I watched. I think they were a bit shook up, but one of the men holding a reflector pointed to a chair, so I quietly sat down and watched my stepdaughter get fucked, sucked, and corn-holed for the rest of the afternoon. Valerie had a part in the flick also. Had it not been for J.M. and the company, I would've made my debut as a motion picture actor also.
"During the filming, my cock got hard several times. During the sixty-nine scene between Monica and Valerie, I almost whipped my cock out and jacked off in front of everyone. I made up my mind right then and there that after Marge went to sleep, I would get the twins to recreate this bizarre and entirely stimulating scene, just for me. It was a new and terribly thrilling experience to see my daughter going down on my mistress and vice versa. I could hardly wait till I could enjoy the observance of Monica and Millie doing the same thing.
"After they were through shooting for the day, Monica and I went straight home. Marge was there when we got there and had a surprise supper all prepared. Somehow the subject of dirty movies came up during the repast, and when my unaware Marge cautioned Monica about attending the X-rated flicks, and Monica and Millie both answered in one voice that they hated that type of thing, I nearly choked on a Brussels sprout.
"After supper and a dull evening of TV, we all decided to turn in before midnight. Marge was horny almost before we got into bed but, looking forward to slipping into the girls' room as soon as Marge was sound asleep, I tried diplomatic ways of postponing any sexual encounter. In the run-down condition I was getting into, either I had to cut out the fucking for a while, or at least taper off. This is not easy to do in a house full of hot-pantied females.
"Finally, Marge dropped off to sleep after playing with my cock for a long time. I fought hard to keep from getting an erection, and I won, thank God!
"About a quarter to two, I silently got out of bed and tiptoed into the girls' room. Millie had dozed off, but Monica was reading. As I entered, Monica shook Millie gently and they made a place for me between them. I dropped my shorts to the floor just before I climbed into the bed. Millie was awake now and was lovingly stroking my eager cock. It started to get hard right away.
"Considering all the exercise that Monica had indulged in earlier, you would think that she hadn't had any sex for weeks on end. I asked them if they would mind putting on an exhibition of mutual cunnilingus for me, and they said that they'd love to. They moved to the foot of the bed and I moved up as close to the head board as I could. It was a sight to behold. Both girls assumed the sixty-nine position and, as I watched their pink little tongues begin to dart in and out of their matching vaginas, my hand went to my cock and began rubbing it with abandon. With my free hand, I reached in between their sweating bodies and with palm upward, began playing with Millie's tits. Then after a few minutes of this, I twisted my hand around palm down and, sliding along Monica's torso, I reached her tits and began fiddling with them. They increased their tonguing of each other and I was doing all I could to keep from coming with excitement when the door flew open and there stood Marge with a look of astonishment on her face.
"I thought Marge would tear the place apart, but I was wrong. She let her nightgown drop to the floor and with a cry of 'Everybody in the pool!' she made the bed in one jump and descended on my erect cock with her mouth. It became a race between the three females to see who could cop my load. It was times like these that make a guy feel really popular.
"To see these women fighting over my cock like it was a scrap of meat and they were starving, was quite an experience. As soon as the girls saw what their mother was trying to do, they stopped sixty-nining each other and both of them made a concerted dive at me. Millie and Monica were being just playful, of course, but when they tried to pull their mother off me, Marge clamped down on my cock with her teeth and wouldn't let go. It hurt like hell, and I screamed something awful. The girls just pulled harder at Marge's shoulders. Finally, they pulled her free, only because my cock had started to go soft and Marge couldn't hang onto it any longer. She did leave some deep teeth marks in it; in fact, it was bleeding. I realized that I was out of commission for a while.
"I looked at them severely and said very sternly, 'See what you greedy girls have brought on yourselves? Daddy's cock is broke, and now nobody gets any.' They applied some soothing medication to my injured member and we spent several hours indulging in various kinds of oral sex. I suffered a bit with my cock, as it tried to get hard on several occasions. For the most part, I don't get terribly excited performing cunnilingus. I love watching it. Maybe
I am turning into a voyeur in my middle age.
"I was amazed at the way Marge accepted the fact that I had been engaging in sex with Monica and Millie. Marge mentioned, during the course of the evening, that she had been aware what had been going on the past few years, and had decided that she would have to get herself rejuvenated if she was ever going to regain sexual companionship with me. She was right.
"And now I was in a bind. In my own household, I had three women to satisfy. And I wasn't sure that I liked it. Since Valerie had come on the scene, I found myself less and less interested in Millie and Monica. It was not that I didn't desire them; I found myself less desirous of the overwhelming passion that I had until recently. Valerie was the first sexual experience I had had outside the family, and I think it aroused the urge to seek 'greener pastures.' Marge's change over to near-nymphomania also had its effect, too. Probably, if Marge had been a sex object in the early days of our marriage, I wouldn't have turned to the girls.
"What had started out to be a beautiful 'triangle' for me was ending up with me as a sex slave to three insatiable women. And I didn't dare complain. One word to Marge in the wrong tone, and she'd be off to Reno or Tijuana in a minute. The threat of J. M.'s wrath hung over me. All in all, things got pretty chaotic."
No matter how you cut it, incest is incest. To deal honestly and objectively with a subject that is a universal taboo requires both boldness and thoroughness. And though stepfather-stepdaughter sexuality is perhaps considered less heinous or reprehensible than overt "blood relation" incest, it is still incest (both legally and morally). The fact that it is the most widely practiced form of incest makes it, we feel, worthy of the most scrupulous and detailed examination. That is why we felt it important to relate the case of Jerry M-and his twin stepdaughters. We make no judgment of the case or. the persons involved, but have only attempted to show a certain type of sexual behavior existing in the tumultuous society of America today.
CHAPTER THREE
Honor Thy Father and Mother
"There's not much left in life for me. I don't mean that I am going to kill myself or something stupid. I just know that I have experienced the kind of happiness that few girls are allowed, and once expressed and experienced, can never be relived or recaptured.
"I've loved and been loved. I've given birth to my lover's baby and I have experienced the surging, fulfilling delight of sexual completion on a level most women twice my age know nothing about.
"But there is agony, too. It is all just memory now. The child is happy, I hope, in what the State of California calls a proper home. I'll never see my baby again and it tears at my heart just to think about it. Love, itself, is gone and my lover is dead.
"It was doomed from the outset. I can see that now. Beauty, rapture and satisfaction, tainted from the start. It was incest of the worst kind, a father and his daughter. What made it even more horrible was the fact that I was the aggressor! I was the one who wanted the experience. I wanted to feel the rigid penis of my own father penetrate my vagina and plunge itself deep inside me, disgorging its hot, steaming juice into my aching womb.
"It's all gone now-but over and finished, it is not. It can never be again; yet it is still with me, morning, night and noon. At night I still cry for the child I shall never see again. I still have my little talks' with Daddy, and I ache-God,how I ache!
"Even when I am with some other man, on my back with my legs spread wide, awaiting his entry, I cannot avoid comparing his organ to the beautiful penis, a tool of love if there ever was one, that I loved and knew so very, very well. Even with a stranger inside me, I am unable to 'let go' and enjoy the efforts of pleasure he is attempting to bring to me. It is not the same. It never can be the same again.
"They say a girl never forgets her first love. I, for a fact know that it is true. I am unable to forget my father and the beautiful expression in his eyes. I cannot forget the wonderful, slightly salty taste of his magnificent penis; the variety of ways he knew and utilized in order to please me. No, these thoughts will remain with me always, and no other man in the world will ever replace my adored, perfect lover-my father!
"Maybe it is wrong to continually live with the past. Some people insist that what is done is done and should be forgotten. Others might say that such thoughts might prove over-stimulating, or that they would damage me in terms of my mental state. But, I could care less for the opinions of others. Other people have done too much damage to me already. They have ruined my supreme happiness, forced me to give up my child and, yes, they even killed my daddy.
"So, when it is too much to bear, particularly when I lie in bed at night, I relive the past happiness by putting my pillow-the same pillow that Daddy used-between my legs and rubbing my vaginal lips against it, and I think how it was, that very first time.
"I feel again the soft touch of his delicate fingers on my budding breasts and the warmth of his palms as they pressed against them, almost as if it were his hands that had caused them to grow. I feel again, his warm, naked body, pressed tightly against mine in the big bed that we shared for so long. I can imagine the silken iron of his penis growing strong in my hand and almost hear my vaginal lips scream out loud for its entry.
"Oh sure, I've had other men, but they're not the same, even though I have played my games with them. They are complete zeros when compared to my daddy. They can't thrill me like he did! They just stick their cock into me like I were a piece of liver and move around just enough to shoot their load and then its 'quits-ville.' If I use enough imagination, for a few short seconds, I can make them seem to be Daddy. Ernie was like that, and it was glorious for a moment or two, until reality returned.
"Ernie and I had been balling. I was lying on my back after it was over. I was sweating in the agony of unfulfillment. He had been in me for some time and he had thrust and caressed and kissed my eager breasts so beautifully. But it was a bummer and I couldn't come even though I was oh so close to it.
"And he couldn't hold. I felt the hot iron of his penis give one final thrust into me and then, with a tremendous throb, let go the hot, scalding sperm.
"Oh, he tried to love me properly. He tried to thrill me, but it wasn't like Daddy and after it was over I lay there in sadness and frustration for a while. What could I do? I kept asking myself that question as Ernie and I shared a cigarette. Smoke filled the tiny bedroom as clouds of indecision filled my mind, and then, as if a big broom had swept the cobwebs from my mind, suddenly I was able to imagine Ernie as Daddy!
"I reached over and snuffed out the cigarette in an ashtray by the bed. Then with eyes closed in order to maintain the mental image I had conjured up, I rolled over and placed my head and lips against the firm stomach of my partner. With one hand I toyed with his soft penis as the other hand reached under and tickled the sensitive area around his ass-hole. I moved my lips down over his flat stomach and over his hips, caressed the muscles of his thighs with them and then slowly worked my way back up.
"All this time I could feel his penis growing in my hand although it was not yet hard enough. While it was still flaccid, and with my eyes still shut, I took the head of it in my mouth-just the head-so I could roll my tongue over the foreskin and pucker my lips around the turgid bulb at the head of the shaft.
"This was almost real. It was as if none of the horrid past had ever happened. As I slid my lips tight around the loose skin and pulled it towards me over its head. Letting it slide back, it was almost as if I were with Daddy once again.
"I couldn't destroy my dream, for I could feel my own wet eagerness bubbling from within coating my vaginal lips with a thin syrup of love that demanded entry. But I dared not open my eyes. I wanted to gaze at the large testicles that I knew lay there, quivering before my face, I wanted to glance upwards and see the expression of gratifying passion on his face. But, I was all too aware that it would not be Daddy's handsome face that appeared before me and, therefore, the illusion would be horribly shattered.
"As I tasted the rigid length of hard penis with my lips, I fondled scrotum and testes with searching fingers and only with my mind's eye conjured a picture of the man I really wanted to be doing these things with.
"I lay there for several minutes licking and sucking, and feeling and tasting until I could no longer endure the ecstatic pleasure of my own act. I, too, had to have something in the crying recesses of my vagina. I twisted my body around so that my firm breasts and hard nipples pressed against his hips and lowered my clitoris over his eager and expectant mouth. I almost reached climax the very second his tongue teasingly entered my moist chamber of passion and I had to hold myself back in order to savor all the delicious pleasure that I might obtain from such a union. Then suddenly I could hold back no longer. My whole being became one vast, enormous vagina and, shudderingly, I came!
"When I spasmed into that orgasm, I let my head fall so that I almost choked on the length of his sex organ in my first moment of relaxation. But, even though it was big and full and wonderful, my orgasm wasn't enough. With the spasmed contractions of its power still ticking within me, I rose so that I straddled him, facing towards his feet. like a tigress in heat, I leaped on the hot iron rod of his manhood and sank down, impaling myself on that great spear of love.
"Now, for the first time, I opened my eyes and I could do it without shattering the image I had so carefully built up. There was a mirror over the dresser at the foot of the bed and I could see everything that was good in it while those things that would've destroyed my fantasy were obscured. I could not see his body or face, but I could see my soft pubic hair and gaping vagina rising and sinking over his gleaming wet penis. I could see and feel his hands as they reached up and gently stroked the distended nipples of my sensitive breasts. I could see every movement of the act of love and the wild half-agonized, half-mad expression on my own face as my hair flew in a wild cloud over my face and body. I could hear the increased rhythm of our breathing and could feel the delicate nuance of tingling pleasure as I controlled the pressure of his penis against my clitoris and the hot, seeping walls of my happy vagina.
"And then-and then-I knew my insides, my soul were going to reach that massive, beautiful, satisfying climax again. This time there was a warning as if a great tidal wave, thundering ashore was going to engulf me. I savored this approach of orgasm; I knew that it would be huge, that it would just about reduce me to a shambles of myself. It grew and grew and rolled against the tumult of my insides for an agony of time, and then ... it hit me, all over and at once.
"I rolled! I churned, and was devoured by such a sense of total ecstasy, so intense and consuming that I cannot find words to describe it. As I felt the consuming release of my own spasm, I felt the tip of the penis and the scalding pleasure of his massive ejaculation.
"I cannot explain the mysteries of the human body, all I know is that I climaxed again. I wept tears of sheer pleasure, and they dripped and flowed from my eyes and ran down till they were cascading over my sweating breasts. When I finally eased back to even a partial sense of reality, I heard myself crying out, 'Daddy ... Daddy ... Daddy...! '
"The last time we had sex together, I really was able to let my vivid imagination run wild. I lay on my back as his head sank between my legs and his tongue played a symphony on my hot hole. Such marvelous improvisations were composed that night! I opened my eyes and looked down at him. His hair was almost the color of Daddy's, and I couldn't see his face, buried as it was in my pubic hair. I put my hands on his head and pushed him to me. This way it increased the pressure of his tongue, lips and jaw against my hungry, gaping vagina. 'Oh, Daddy ... Daddy,' I murmured. 'Just like that, Daddy. Eat me, eat me. Ah, that's it, just like that.' And then when the dream was complete, I orgasmed.
"That last time with Ernie I orgasmed three times. Once when he ate me, once when his penis entered me and, finally, when he came. But that was the end of it. That was the nearest I had come to the joy that I once knew so well. Ernie's gone now. There are other men, of course. Sometimes I can command my imagination to work in conjunction with them, but it is a rare occasion when it succeeds. It really isn't the same, you know.
"It can't be the same, ever, because there was too much in my involvement with Daddy. But, perhaps I had better start at the beginning.
"Mom left us when I was ten years old. Daddy wasn't the same after she left. He started drinking heavily and went around with tears in his eyes most of his waking moments. He started drifting from job to job in the small town back East where we lived. Then, suddenly, he snapped back to his old self, packed up our belongings and we moved to Los Angeles, where he got a job in the aero-space industry. We had a nice little two-bedroom house in the Valley and life became pleasantly routine.
"I'd seen Daddy naked before, just as I had seen Mom, and I was never aware that anything was wrong in that. Our family was never one for Victorian pruderies. But, one hot summer's day, I got the first inkling that I wasn't a little girl anymore, and it was Daddy who inadvertently turned me on!
"As I had said before, it was a hot, sticky day, and Daddy suggested that we both take a shower in order to cool off a bit. We stripped and went into the bathroom. Daddy had taken three fresh towels from the dresser drawer. Two, he hung on the towel rack, and the third he placed in front of the shower stall as a mat.
"As Daddy adjusted the flow and temperature of the water, I quickly stepped into the shower. He followed me. Until this precise moment, I had never really looked at Daddy closely. For some reason I was virtually compelled by some force to look at him, as if I were seeing him for the very first time.
"He was a tall man, in his middle thirties. I can't really describe his facial features, for worry sometimes made him look terribly old and yet when he was untroubled he had the countenance of a teenager. His hair was light, almost like a Swedish blonde. He was thin, but in a way that people would call wiry. Actually, he had a beautiful build. He never bothered with muscle building, so it was natural; he liked to participate in all kinds of strenuous sports.
"This afternoon, as I stood in the shower with him, soaping myself down, I was utterly fascinated with his sexual parts. They caused me to have goose bumps all over. I was amazed as his nakedness had never affected me like this before. His penis fascinated me! That long, pale tube extended from a nest of blonde pubic hair like a magic wand of some kind-a magic wand that later, would transport me to heaven! Something made me want to reach out and touch it! I could not resist. I think Daddy was aware of what was going on in my mind. At least, he saw my hand move towards his penis. Without any abrupt movement, or anger, or any embarrassment, he simply turned around and asked me to wash his back. That brought me back to reality, although I still thought about the sight of his penis and the thrilling effect it had on me. I did wash his back and I washed-or actually, rubbed with the wash rag-my own genital area at the same time.
"That night when I went to sleep I couldn't get the erotic thoughts about Daddy's penis out of my mind. It was new and thrilling and I was enchanted by these new-found feelings. When I awoke the following morning I found that I was in his bed, with nothing on but my panties. Daddy had slept on the couch in the living room. I knew something else, too, when I woke up. I knew that I must have dreamed strange and forbidden thoughts. His pillow was pressed tightly between my legs and against my vagina and I succumbed to my first strange and compelling urge that morning! I found myself waking from sleep with my own hand moving tenderly down my bare tummy and under the elastic band of my panties. I reached lower, unable to stop my movement and slipped my forefinger into my sexual parts, to find them, to my amazement, very warm and pleasantly wet.
"At first, I was alarmed and frightened by this feeling of hot wetness and I raised my head and shoulders so that I could examine myself. I had been menstruating for the past year or so and was regular all the time, and I knew that I wasn't due for at least another week. Nothing seemed to be wrong so I lay there and continued running my finger in and out of my vagina. It was getting warmer and wetter all the time.
Suddenly, I had a vision of Daddy's penis, as I had seen it in the shower yesterday afternoon. I imagined that I was leaning over and kissing it.
"My sex fantasies about dear Daddy continued on for months. I was beginning to biologically mature. My breasts were quite large and surmounted with sweet, coral-colored nipples. I never let an opportunity pass where I could flaunt my nakedness in front of Daddy. One day he walked into my room as I stood in front of the dressing table mirror, naked and cupping a breast in each hand. He blushed at seeing me thusly. I felt a smirk of triumph show itself in my smile. Good! I thought. He's thinking of me as a woman!
"Daddy didn't have many girl friends over the years, but he did occasionally date. Whether or not he had a mistress, I don't know. If he did, I wasn't aware of it. There was one lady, though, who he saw a lot of-a Mrs. W--. I don't know whether she was married, widowed or divorced; I never saw her husband. She came over one Saturday afternoon as I was swimming in our new pool. From poolside I could see her and Daddy through the screen door, as they sat in the breakfast nook sipping iced tea. I was drying off under the hot sun when I dozed off. I must have slept for about twenty minutes, for when I awoke the sun was going down and Daddy and his female friend were no longer in the kitchen. I got up off of the chaise and went into the house to look for them. I heard noises coming from Daddy's room, I stopped as if I had run into a brick wall. If I had wanted to scream, I couldn't have, for my throat constricted so tightly that I almost choked.
"Daddy was lying on his back in the bed without a shred of clothes on, and Mrs. W-, also naked, was kneeling over him. Her vagina was almost at Daddy's mouth and her own mouth was gliding up and down the length of his penis, which was standing straight up in the air!
"I stood there, seemingly for hours-though it could only have been for a few seconds-horrified. Daddy was moaning like he was in terrible pain and Mrs. W was making little grunting noises in her mouth as she moved her whole head up and down Daddy's penis. How can I describe my feelings about blundering in on these strange activities? Though I was repelled, I was curiously also attracted to these strange goings on.
"Finally, I could stand no more of what was going on. It looked horrible and I was sure Mrs.
W-somehow was hurting Daddy. I gasped and, slamming the bedroom door shut-with a crash, I fled to the sanctity of my own room. I felt terribly alone and left out.
"How long I remained sobbing on my bed, I don't know, but finally I felt a gentle hand touch my shoulder. I knew it was Daddy, there to comfort me as always. I turned a tear-stained face towards him. He looked so embarrassed, like a little kid who had been caught stealing from the cookie jar. 'Go 'way,' I cried. T don't ever want to see you again!' He didn't leave. He sat down on the edge of the bed and, with one hand still resting on my shoulder, asked me in a very calm voice, why I was so upset.
"I was infuriated even more by his patronizing attitude. 'Why am I so upset?' I exploded. T saw what she was doing to you!' He didn't say anything for what seemed to be an eternity. Then I felt his hand leave my shoulder. I felt suddenly cold and alone. I thought he had left me. I hated him for a brief moment. I rolled over and sat up, rubbing my wet eyes. I saw him still there. He was seated in the chair, across from the foot of the bed, dressed in a bathrobe. My relief in finding that he had not left me dissipated any anger that I had felt.
" 'I suppose that she's still in there,' I snarled.
" 'No,' he told me. 'She's gone.'
"Then I seemed to break down again, though my tears were all gone. I think I was still in a state of shock. 'Oh, Daddy.' I sobbed. 'How could you do such a dirty, nasty thing?'
" 'Nasty?' he said. "Trixie, there was nothing nasty about what you saw. You weren't supposed to see it, I know that, but we thought you were asleep outside by the pool.'
" 'But she had your ... your. ... Well, it was in her mouth! I saw it there. Tell me it isn't a filthy thing to do and I'll call you a liar!'
"Then it seemed that he was the one who became angry, not in the same way that I was. His voice took on an edge to it that I had never heard before, but he spoke slowly and clearly, so that I would not misunderstand. "Trixie,' he said, 'I'm a grown man and lonely for female companionship since your mother left us. Above all-I do not have to account to you for the things I do. You've seen something that I wished you hadn't, and because of that I feel you are entitled to an explanation. You haven't seen anything nasty, dirty, or necessarily wrong. Constance W-and I like each other, we like each other very much. When two adults like each other, they can show it in a multitude of ways.'
"Suddenly, something I couldn't control took hold of me. I never for an instant considered the implication that could be made of the torrent of words I blurted out-I never realized what they would ultimately mean. 'But, you let her do it to you! You wouldn't let me ... I mean ... you don't even let me see you ... you know ... naked ... anymore. You're supposed to like me better than anyone else. Then, when you think I'm gone ... or asleep ... you let her ... do that to you. How could you love me and let someone else ... a stranger, do that to you?'
"I must have said a lot more than that in my outburst, but I don't remember enough to properly quote. I only remember that I had said too much-too much to stop. I had been acting like a jealous woman rather than a daughter and now I had let my father know my deepest, most secret, innermost feelings. My mouth must have dropped open with shock at my own words just as his did, but there I still sat on the bed silent now, he stared at me with an expression of uncomprehending disbelief.
" 'You don't know what you are saying, Trixie,' he muttered.
" 'Yes I do,' I barked back. 'I want you to love me ... not some old bag like Mrs. W--! '
"I suppose that was the beginning even though it wasn't the beginning. Daddy seemed very upset and at a complete loss for words. He got up and left the room, allowing me to remain and ponder my own thoughts. The cat was out of the bag. It was up to him to see what he was going to do about it.
"The change that took place in the relationship between Daddy and me began then. It was a slow and gradual thing, that no one, except perhaps a trained psychologist, would have foreseen. Before, we had been a deserted husband and his adolescent daughter living a normal and respectable life. Now, because of my wild fantasies and childish dreams of romance-and most of all my big, fat mouth-everything was to change.
"Daddy didn't see Mrs. W-ever again. I heard she had moved away from the area. I also found out, to my dismay, that they had considered marriage. So, I was doubly pleased that she had gone. Now I had Daddy all to myself. I don't honestly think that Daddy minded. I do not think to this day, that he had any deep love for that woman and I am also sure that he was through entertaining any ideas about getting married again.
"One evening we were sitting close together listening to Beethoven's First Symphony. It was a new Von Karajan recording and we were completely engrossed in the music. I was 'waning back and Daddy had his arm across the top of the sofa, above my head. So enraptured was I with the strains of music pouring forth from the stereo, I hardly noticed his fingers slip down to my shoulder. I felt warm and comfortable at his touch and snuggled closer to him. His hand dropped further down until it almost cupped my right breast. He suddenly moved his hand away and reached over to the coffee table for a cigarette. 'Don't go away,' I said. "That felt so good.' He cleared his throat and lit the cigarette.
"Please, Daddy,' I said. "Touch me there again.
" "Trixi-' he began.
" 'What's the matter, Daddy?' I think for the first time in my life I saw that he was embarrassed.
" 'Nothing,' he said. 'It's only that-' " 'What?'
"He took a long, slow drag on his cigarette, held in the smoke for a long time, then turned to me with a very strange half-lost look on his face. 'You know,' he said at long last, 'you look almost exactly like your mother. I guess that I-' Again I waited for him to finish, but this time without uttering a single word. When he did speak again, his voice was tense and low, almost as if he had to force enough volume into it for me to hear him. 'Remember, Trixie, a long time ago when you asked me about boys and menses?'
"A strange and unexplained thrill seemed to tingle though me for a fraction of a second, then disappeared as quickly as it had occurred. I nodded my head.
" 'Well, now that you've grown into such a beautiful young woman, I guess I didn't stop to think.'
" 'About what, Daddy?'
" 'About touching you ... there....'
" 'I like it, Daddy,' I said. 'Please touch me there again.'
"He didn't say anything after that, but I . could see that he was fighting something within himself. I also knew when he had lost the fight. He again leaned back against the back of the couch and, still holding the cigarette in his left hand, slipped his arm over my shoulders and gently, but much more firmly this time, cupped my right breast. I, in turn, snuggled close to him and first let my head rest on his chest, then relaxed so that it was in his lap. And then I knew what I had only sensed before, because under my right ear I could feel the surge of excitement pushing directly on my brain as his penis grew and throbbed against my cheek.
" 'Daddy?' I murmured.
" 'What, Trixie?'
" 'Let me sleep in your bed tonight?' " 'What?'
" 'Hold me like this,' I said. 'Let me sleep in the same bed with you.'
"He didn't answer for a minute or so. I thought for a second that he hadn't heard me. He was breathing hard, but finally the answer came, 'Okay, Trixie, okay.' "
Gebhard, Gagnon, Pomeroy and Christenson found, in Sex Offenders, that incestuous fathers " ... came from large families, were liberally endowed with sisters and got along well with both parents . ... All in all, these men may be described as conservative, moralistic, restrained, religiously devout, traditional and uneducated." Weinberg's findings, in Incest Behavior, were similiar. He found, " ... the average father was between forty and forty-five years of age, had spent his childhood in a rural community in Europe or America and had come from a dependent or marginal socio-economic group." Gebhard found these men ". . .to have been impulsive and given to rather disorganized lives that were complicated by drinking."
Weinberg, again, in his sampling of over a hundred father incest transgressors, commented, "The father usually did not commit property offenses but had been arrested for personal offenses such as wife-beating, disorderly conduct, public nuisance, and sex charges. These offenses arose from personality disturbances rather than criminal inclinations." These men almost always had suffered from unhappy marriages. Often their wives found their husbands sexually unstimulating, laughed at them or rebuked their advances.
In the case of Trixie's father, whom we shall call Ted for the purpose of this narrative, the abandonment of his daughter and himself by his wife, left him bitter and lonely. Because of this desertion, the bond between the two victims became unnaturally strong. As Trixie matured and took over the responsibilities of running the home, she became more wife than daughter to her father.
As Trixie entered adolescence, she turned her budding sexuality inwards, toward her ideal, her father. After the episode involving the unfortunate Mrs. W-triggered her latent incestual urgings to overt demonstration, the actual incestuous behavior became a dominant factor in the lives of both the father and the daughter.
According to reputable researchers, the daughter participants seem to be young, on the average around fifteen or sixteen years of age. They seem to be of two distinctive types: Passive, passive-resistive or promiscuous. The passive type is better adjusted and more apt to report the offense. Once relieved of the affair, she will seek outside sexual contacts.
Gebhard, et al, found " ... in nearly half of the offenses the fathers claimed either their daughters encouraged them or were passive, while the official record is that they resisted. In one third of the cases both sources of information agree that the daughters were encouraging or passive."
It is fairly obvious that Trixie belongs to the latter category, the promiscuous. Even though she had not experienced coitus prior to her seduction of her father, mentally she was a past master of sexual intercourse, due to the years of sexual fantasizing. There is a good chance that had Trixie belonged to a larger family group, she may have initiated sexual relations with brothers, cousins or uncles.
"As we lay there, snuggled comfortably together, Daddy began explaining what he called "The Facts of Life.' He explained that sex between humans was different than it was between animals. Besides being just a biological need, it was also based on strong, intra-personal emotions and needed the skill and understanding of both partners. A girl had to know how to please a man, he said, before she could be pleased by him. First, he was going to show me about men.
"The light at the head of the bed was still on and, lying on my side, I could see the whole length of Daddy's slim and muscular body as he lay on his back with the arched shape of his penis pointing up from its soft nest of pubic hair.
"Very slowly he began to explain how the penis worked and what was most exciting and stimulating to a man. He showed me the foreskin and head of his penis and then, with just the finger and thumb, showed me how to move the skin back and forth to cause a pleasant sensation. I longed to try it out for myself, but he abruptly changed the subject to that of women.
"He explained the sexual function of the vagina, clearly and concisely. He said that the greatest sensation lay around the clitoris but that stimulation was also achieved by other inside areas. He reached over and demonstrated. He slipped his middle finger into my slit. I already was terribly excited and my vaginal lips were extremely moist. He expressed surprise at this. He agitated my clitoris gently and I had to struggle to keep from squirming right out of the bed.
"I lay there with my legs spread wide, letting the sensations of Daddy's fingers shoot through me like wonderful waves of electric shocks. I can't express in proper words just how good it felt. I watched him while he leaned on his side and explained to me what he was doing. I was so ecstatic that I closed my eyes and drifted into pink pools of sheer delight.
"I kind of forgot everything he was saying, as in my mind his voice sounded very faint. I do remember him saying that a girl had a hymen and that it should remain intact until she found a husband. He said that there were many other ways that a girl could satisfy a man. Often women liked it when men used their mouths on them. These words jarred me to a turbulent consciousness and filled my mind with the image of Mrs. W-using her mouth on Daddy. I had a wild desire to touch his penis, to fondle it, to kiss it, and to take it into my mouth and suck on it, just as I had seen Mrs. W-do it. I also felt that I could do it better, even if it took some amount of practice!
"As he continued playing with me and talking, I reached out shyly and touched his penis. Then, when I knew that he was not going to stop me, I clasped my hand around it, just as he had taught me, and moved the foreskin back and forth. He smiled and shut his eyes, lay back, and became completely relaxed.
"I became bolder now, perhaps because I knew that he was enjoying it so much. I rolled over and, moving my head down, gently kissed the tip of his organ. He gave out a quick sigh and allowed his fingers to slip out of my hot vagina. The slippery fluid from my slit was streaked across my inner thigh as his hand trailed across it. I kissed his penis again, this time allowing my mouth to open just a bit. I felt the pressure of his organ against my teeth. I continued my exploration bit by bit until I had the whole head of his penis in my mouth.
"Daddy let out a massive groan. I knew he was not in any kind of pain. He was just reacting out of delighted excitement. Just the thought of him being so excited caused wave upon wave of excitement to course through me. He cried out as his organ began to throb and twitch. I thought his penis was going to explode, and it started to gag me. I pulled away just as he started to ejaculate. Hot sperm shot into the air and splattered into my face and hair. I was so surprised that I didn't even move. Then I started to laugh. Daddy looked at me strangely for a second, then his face broke into an embarrassed grin. Then he started laughing and, reaching up with his muscular arms, he drew me to him in a tight hug.
Some of his own come smeared the side of his face as he hugged me so very tightly, but neither of us cared, because we felt so good and so happy.
"As we lay there, locked tightly in each other's arms, I suddenly realized that I was still very much excited. I told Daddy that I wished he could make it hard again, as I wanted to suck on it some more. He said, "Trixie, as much as I would like to, I can't. At least not for a while.' He went on to explain that men need time to recoup from an ejaculation. But if I wished it, he would do something nice for me. I said I would love it, whatever it was that he wanted to do to me.
"He flipped out the light, and the room was bathed in silver moonlight. His head became a silhoutte as it bent down towards my eager crotch. I was a little nervous at first, but my apprehension was quickly dissipated at the first touch of his rough, wet, and warm tongue. I spread my legs even wider as it penetrated me between my pubic hairs. I gripped the edge of the mattress with my trembling hands.
"An ecstasy of sound, feel, and color shot through me, tingling every fiber of my being as his tongue parted my dripping lips and titillated my erect clitoris. It felt wonderful. I felt his ears grow hot as they touched my trembling thighs.
"An instant-an eternity-I shall never know! Nor shall I ever know the exact sensations that coursed through me like machine-gun bullets, burning me here, freezing me there, electrifying my body and my soul, and causing it to soar out to some vast and craggy seacoast where it finally crashed into the gigantic roaring breakers that surged forth to engulf it forever ! I knew I had reached what they called an 'orgasm,' and what a delicious experience it was. It seemed to rock the entire world. I felt like I was an atom bomb that had just been detonated.
"I did not cry out. After it was over, and just a trace of the sensation was left to lull me into total relaxation, I sighed, 'Daddy ... Daddy ... Daddy!' A cry that I would repeat again and again for the rest of my life.
"Daddy was breathing hard as he crawled up next to me. That night he became 'Daddy' to me in name only. For written on my heart and brain in indelible ink was the word Lover, to remain there forever. I lay there, trying to collect my thoughts and emotions, but without successthey remained muddled, but I was so happy, thrilled, and satisfied. Finally I put my arms around dear, beloved Daddy, and held him close to me. We didn't speak, for our actions were all the speech neccessary.
"I was totally unaware of the conflict in Daddy's mind. I didn't know that the supreme act of love would cause him so much pain. And what he didn't know was that he had opened a door that had better have remained closed, for I was turned on and would remain so for the rest of my life.
"I found I dug oral sex. I knew that there was a lot more to it than that, but this first experience had a traumatic effect. I always wanted to go down first, before I would let him go in.
"After that, we slept together every night. I never slept in my own room again. Those who say that Daddy taught me to be a nymphomaniac or that he was some sort of depraved sexual monster are all wrong. I was fifteen and my body was as completely developed as any grown woman's should be. Daddy was in his early forties, but was in such great physical shape, due to his constant exercise, that he looked ten years younger. My sexuality had not reached its peak, and his was on the decline, so we were perfectly suited to each other.
"I have no idea of the regularity of our sexual acts. I really didn't keep score. I do know that we did it when and where we felt like it, and there was enough activity so that neither of us felt deprived.
"I shall never forget the night he took my hymen. It was to be my 'night of nights,' and I was so bitterly disappointed. It happened this way.
"We were lying in bed. It was a hot night and we had thrown the sheets back so what breeze there was could waft its way across our perspiring naked bodies. I guess Daddy's mind was on the subject for some time, as oral sex was becoming tedious, and I longed for his big penis to shove its way into my vagina. He said, Trix, I want to show you what most people consider "normal" intercourse. I don't want you to become frightened, because it may cause you a little pain. You know that I love you and wouldn't hurt you for anything in the world.' He then asked me to spread my legs wide apart and, kneeling between them, touched the opening of my vagina, first with his finger and then with the head of his penis, which was just as stiff as his finger by now.
"It felt so good when he put the head of it into my tiny slit. It was a very tight fit, but it didn't hurt like I figured it would. Of course, it wasn't in very far; just the head was in. He jiggled it about a bit, and I felt a tremendous excitement from the sensation. Then, all of a sudden, he pulled out quickly, jumped out of bed, and ran into the bathroom. He closed the door as he switched on the light, so I couldn't see what he was doing. After a few minutes he returned to bed. His penis was soft and as he climbed over me a teardrop of sperm dropped onto my leg. It was cold and I jumped a bit.
" 'What happened?' I asked.
" 'Nothing, I just "shot" my load,' he replied.
"I was mad. 'Shouldn't you have done that inside me?' I asked. I was so terribly disappointed.
" 'I didn't want to hurt you, Trixie,' he told me. 'I can't get you pregnant. We don't want that, do we?'
"Whatever my reaction was to his statement, it included pique and hurt and a desire to get even with him for denying me the pleasure and satisfaction I thought should be rightfully mine. I don't know what I planned, or even if I planned anything at all. Even if I had, I couldn't have done anything about it because I had my period the very next day, and I would have four more before Daddy would gratify me even orally again.
"Then one evening the ultimate change in our association occurred and life was forever different for us. We had just taken our usual shower together, and after tenderly washing Daddy's penis, I got the urge for some sex. Remember, it had been quite some time since our last union.
"I was pretty hot and raring to go and, unless he had been cheating on me somewhere, Daddy should have been well primed for action. We got into bed and covered up. I wasted no time, reaching down and starting to play industriously with his penis. It sprang to life immediately. He responded with equal fervor, and began kissing me behind the ear and down along the neck. I got even more excited. We lay there for a while; he, running his fingers around the entrance to my vagina, and I, manipulating the loose foreskin that surrounded his iron-like shaft.
"I was so wild with desire that I almost forgot the plan I had worked out in my mind the day before. I had decided to find a way to force him to bust my hymen. I was sure it would work, but I was so delighted with this precoitus love play, that I had almost instant orgasm. Daddy leaned over and began to lick the lips of my vagina as he usually did. I enjoyed it immensely. I could feel his penis swelling and I knew that he was just about ready to come, right there in the open air. I gently pushed him away until he rolled over on his back, with that adorable penis sticking up in the air like a flagpole. I said, 'Daddy, let me do you,' and he said, 'Sure, go ahead,' and lay back with his eyes screwed tightly shut as he usually did.
"Quick as a flash, I was up and poised in a straddle position over his thighs. Before he could recover from the surprise of my strange movements, I had sat down on him, jamming that penis of his all the way into me. I felt a sudden spasm of pain as his hard penis tore away what had been my most cherished possession-my hymen. The full hardness and length of his penis, for the first time fully inside me, filled me with the kind of love that I had wanted for, oh, so long a time. He cried out, 'No, Trix ... no ... no! Oh no!' but it was too late now.
"He was fully inside me and we were both slaves to our passion and to our intertwined emotions. I moved up and down on him, pressing his organ against the tenderness of mine. I knew that he was moving in order to get me underneath. He heaved with a surge of strength, and flipped me over, with his penis still inside me, until I was beneath him. His hands quickly went under my buttocks and my legs twined around his back so that the heels of my feet played a tattoo on his spinal column. His lips found mine and the huge, wonderful pressure of him inside me tore and thrilled me at the same time, so that I was sure that I was going absolutely insane with the excitement of it.
"I must have screamed in my intense pleasure! I felt one hand move from under me and gently cup inself over my mouth as the piston-like movement seemed to increase to a point where I knew I could no longer stand it. I remember biting his hand until he withdrew it, and shouting, 'Come in me! Come off in me!' And then it happened. My entire body and soul seemed to explode at the same time and shatter throughout the whole universe, and all time itself seemed to stop. I was there-and I was not there. I was floating in space, and at the next instant rolling in a boiling hot surf, and all the time I was writhing in order to get more of his penis deep inside me.
"He shuddered, too, and his legs moved just as if he were trying to swim inside me. And I wanted him to do just that. Oh, God! If he could just crawl up inside me, I would be in heaven. We both had come together, and it seemed like we plunged and wiggled and clung desperately to one another for hours and hours. We continued until we were totally drained of any emotion that we could have ever contained in our bodies or in our souls.
"His penis slipped out of me and I reached down and touched it. Not with lust, but with tenderness. I wanted to feel once more the thing that had, just seconds ago, brought me such sublime happiness.
"We lay exhausted, both staring at the dim ceiling above us, without speaking, for words were no longer necessary. I was still stroking his soft, damp penis. He leaned over and kissed me gently on the forehead. "Trixie, I love you more than anything else in the world,' he said. The words thrilled me and I snuggled down close to him. The smell of his sweat had a musky, sexy odor and I felt so sexy and so well loved. I really felt like I was in heaven! All that I had wanted, had anticipated, had been given me, in a greater magnitude than I ever expected. My vagina was a little sore, but I didn't even mind that. At last, I thought, Daddy is mine, all mine, forever and ever and ever.
"Six months later, I found out I was pregnant. I was not shocked or frightened-I was ecstatically happy. I wanted Daddy's child. I had deceived him, for he thought that I had been making regular use of the pill, but I had deliberately wanted to become inseminated by my paternal lover. I felt that since I was his 'wife' in just about every way possible except legally, a child would just about complete everything and find us together forever. I was so young and ignorant. My rash act brought our whole idyllic world crashing down around us.
"As I have stated, Daddy thought I was still using the pill. We made love almost every night. One night we were locked in a tight embrace and he was thrilling me with each and every thrust. like a shaft of sheer power and energy, it slid back and forth in my welcoming vagina, the faithful and happy servant of a monstrous passion.
"After what seemed like hours of agonized pleasure, during which I savored every second of our love, I felt the first throbs of his involuntary muscles pulsating him into orgasm. The hot jet of his love literally bored into me. I tried to rise to the ceiling as he tried to drive me into the floor.
"My orgasm was total, full, from the freedom of knowing that I was in no danger of getting pregnant-I already was! Within seven months I would bring into the world a true 'love-child.' Yes, a child born of great love and passion. So involved was I in my love and my expectations that I did not bother to look out of the bedroom window. Had I, I doubt if I would have assigned any importance to the occasional flick of moonlight that was reflected in the window of the apartment directly across from our own. If I had only known, I would have begged Daddy to move as quick as possible. All of this information became known to me later and came out at Daddy's trial. In looking back the whole thing seemed to have happened this way:
"The light I failed to recognize in the apartment opposite ours was a reflection in the lens of a pair of binoculars, held by a boy I didn't know. He was thirteen years old and a practiced 'peeping torn.' For weeks he had been watching Daddy and me making love! I am sure if that knowledge had been confined to Steve (that was the young observer's name) it would have gone no further. He was not a tease and, if anything, was a shy, inoffensive type, happy in his voyeurism. I am sure he would have been content to silently watch, but as luck would have it, he was caught in his harmless avocation by his rather straitlaced grandmother, who was with him that unfortunate night. It was during this period that I became aware of my expectancy. I told Daddy, as soon as I was sure, and he took me to a doctor for verification. We drummed up a 'rape-by-teen-age-thugs story.' The doctor went for the fiction, hook, line, and sinker. I, of course, did not know that Daddy's reason for this course of action was so that he and the doctor could arrange for a legal abortion! If I had known, I would have fought tooth and nail to have our child.
"So things appeared to run smoothly. Daddy and I had thought of everything, and I settled down to wait for an event which I knew was going to be the happiest of my young life. The only thing that I hadn't planned on was Steve. I had no idea that, in addition to watching Daddy and me make love each night, he kept a completely detailed diary in which he described acts, positions, and even facial expressions-and filed them under time and date.
"At the last check-up at the doctors, we found that I was too far gone to risk an abortion, and I was delirious, though Daddy was extremely upset. He feared that the baby might be born, in some way, defective, due to the close blood-relationship. I pooh-poohed his fears and scoffed them off as old wives' tales; he finally accepted the idea, and was soon as happily expectant as I.
"For three more months I was free of all frustrations. Daddy and I proved our love every night and sometimes in the afternoon. I became even more uninhibited. But, the sands in our glass of pleasure were soon to run out.
"We'd had a lovely day. A small supper with wine put us in a romantic mood. We'd gone to bed early, and even though my belly was rather large by this time, Daddy was aroused. Daddy was, oh, so gentle. Our movements were slow and deliberate-almost those of two gourmets savoring a delicious meal, yet not knowing it was to be our last. I think we both wanted to prolong our ultimate responses as long as we could. I pulled Daddy as close as I could get him towards me, wrapping my legs around him. I knew he was due to come, and I knew we could come together. I was ready, and he was ready, and just as we were to orgasm, I whispered into his ear: 'Oh! ... oh! Daddy, Daddy, Daddy....'
"Suddenly there was a crash! The door flew open with a splintering sound and the apartment-house manager and another man stood there staring at us with eyes wide open with astonishment and their jaws firm with determination.
"It had finally happened-the thing that I had subconsciously feared-the discovery of our tabooed love affair. I knew in that terrible instant that I had 'known' my father for the last time ever. The manager quickly moved forward, pulled Daddy off my steaming body, and nearly flung him against the wall. He turned to me and curtly ordered that I put something on. I was too shocked to do anything for a minute. I just stood there, stunned, with Daddy's sperm dripping down the insides of my legs. Daddy had regained some composure and had donned a shirt and a pair of slacks. He handed me a shift that was hanging on a peg in my closet, and I quietly slipped into it.
"We went into the living room, and the other man, whom the manager had presumably brought along as a witness, called the police. Daddy and I sat there, looking sadly into each other's eyes. When he left between two burly policemen, handcuffs cutting into wrists clasped behind his back, it was the last time I ever saw Daddy. As he struggled to get in the back seat of the patrol car, he turned for a brief instant; a slight smile of encouragement appeared on his face, and he winked confidently. It was all a sham, for Daddy was finished. Three days after his trial and conviction for criminal incest, he hung himself in his cell at the county jail. Six months later I had a baby boy, healthy and normal in all respects. Because I was a juvenile, they placed him in a foster home. I never did find out where it was.
"With all my faults, and in spite of all I lack in happiness and the kind of fulfillment that so few women ever get, I still have my passionate memories. No matter what society or the shrinks say, these are memories of joy and beauty for me, and I shall always love my wonderful Daddy!"
The resolution of the preceding case history-tragic and full of pathos as it is-is such that any commentary on it would be superfluous. The question of the validity-or of the inhumanity-of the incest taboo, of course, arises in cases such as that of Trixie and her father. The girl claims that the child was "healthy and normal in all respects." It is not impossible that he was; it is not improbable even that the same child will grow up to be a healthy and normal man, in all respects. The trauma that his mother, young Trixie, had undergone, and the aftereffects from which she will probably never escape, however, in a way negate the incestuous offspring's normalcy.
CHAPTER FOUR
My Mother ... the Lesbian
"I don't know why you people are trying to make some kind of federal case out of all this. So my father and I have been fucking each other for five years. So what? I didn't invent sex, or this incest game; anyways, what's so bad about it? If you dig it and it's your bag, to hell with what anybody else says! Pop wasn't getting anything from Mom, so I figure I was doing him a favor. He's a nice enough guy, and he don't deserve the bad scene my old lady has been giving him all these years. I came home from school early one fine May afternoon and I find good old Pop giving it to Tillie (she's my aunt). He was really throwing the meat to her and she was loving every single bit of it.
"I grab the old Polaroid and start snapping away. I got some great shots. Pop is hung like a mule and he sure knows what to do with his tongue. I got really itchy in the crotch and wanted some of what Tillie was diggin' so much. But I had a feelin' that Pop would be kinda squeamish at the idea of ballin' his own daughter. I figured if I took enough good pictures, I might convince him of the necessity of swinging my way.
"Like, he got all tore out of his skull, Poppa did, when he glommed the full-color shots for the first time. He begged me to give him the pictures, but I told him that I intended to keep them. He asked me what I intended to do with them, and when I told him, he damned near passed out.
" 'Look, Pop, I want you to do for me what you just did for Aunt Tillie.'
"He said, 'What do you mean?'
"And I replied, 'I want you to go down on me.'
"He turned green. He tried to sound stern as he said, 'Now, Doris, dear, what would your mother say if she heard you talking like that?'
"Now this really pissed me off. He hated her as much as I did. He hadn't been getting any from her for years. I knew I was a better lay than she ever was, and I was determined to prove it.
"Pop flopped down on the sofa in the front room. I knew the coast was clear, 'cause my old lady wouldn't be home for several hours. Standing in front of him, I slipped out of my skirt and blouse. I stood before my old man in nothing but a sheer pair of panties. I don't wear a bra anymore if I can help it. I enjoy the stares and the feeling that I am 'turning on' the whole male population. I also saw that I was turning on' Pop. His eyes darted towards the triangle formed by my tummy and legs meeting, that glorious sweat-hole called cunt. I was proud of mine. It had been doing me real good service in the last couple of years. Ask the football team and a certain botany professor.
"I slowly and deliberately slid my panties down over my legs and watched Pop lick his lips with wild anticipation. They say that 'a hard on has no conscience,' and that was certainly true in the case of dear old Pop, for I could see he was getting aroused. His big rod was swelling and bulging against the restraint of his trouser leg. As my furry cunt sashayed in front of him his eyes became saucers and his Adam's apple jitterbugged the length of his neck.
" 'Why are you doing this, Doris?' he gasped.
" 'Because,' I answered, 'I know you've been "fixed" and I hate taking the pill. Besides, what's wrong about keepin' it in the family? I have a lot more to offer than ol' Auntie!' And it was true. Aunt Tillie was Mom's oldest sister, about forty-eight, and a drunk. She'd come over with a bottle of gin at least once a week, when Mom was out, of course, and she and Pop would kill it. Yesterday was the first time I had caught them screwin', but I had suspected as much for a long time.
" 'One other thing, Pop,' I added. 'You won't tell. Mom would murder you if she saw these pictures. And then-you are my daddy, and I love you, Daddy. Daddies love their daughters and they spank them when they are "bad." I'm bad, Pop. Won't you give me a good lickin'! ' He shook his head no, but I saw the rod he was packin' and as far as I am concerned it says yes.
"So I reached down, real quick like, undid his fly, and took it out. He kind of squeaked, like a scared rabbit, and then I knelt down and began to give him a hand job. He closed his eyes up tight, like what he can't see won't hurt him. His rod was as big as a cucumber and he was breathin' so hard that I thought in five more jerks he would pop off his whole load. I stopped. He opened his eyes, and it was damn plain that he was sorely disappointed.
"Even in spite of his obvious disappointment, he said, 'Doris, please stop this. You are making both of us commit a mortal sin; we'll both burn in the hellfires of eternal damnation.'
"I laughed and told him that I was already burning down below, in the cavern of my cunt, and that I needed his six-inch fire extinguisher to put those 'fires of hell' out.
"I jumped up,'turned around, and sat down squarely on his jabbing rod. It slipped into my aching cunt and filled it from wall to wall. I heard him sigh with pleasure. 'Why, Pop, that's no way for a father to act. Ain't you ashamed of yourself?'
"I rode him for a while, sliding up and down his great rod, holding his balls in one hand like the reins of a horse. Then I could tell again that he was about to lose his juice, so I eased up off his rod and stood up. Then he started to give me that 'candy-away-from-a-baby' look again, and a big tear started to run down his cheek. He said, 'No more, Doris. Stop now, and we will get down on our knees and pray together and ask the Lord for forgiveness. What we are doing is an abomination!'
"I told him to get up, and he did, like a meek little child. Then I sat down where he was sitting, only I was sort of lying on my back with my legs spread wide and my steaming, dripping cunt wide open. 'Now, dearest Pop, I want you to get down on your knees. If there's any praying to be done, it better be you praying that I come fast.'
"Pop just stood there, lookin' kinda stupid. He was shaking his head and muttering no in a sickly, squeaky whisper, but I could see in his eyes that he was fighting the devil for all he was worth. 'Dear Pop, if you don't, Mom's going to see a swell bunch of pictures....' Down he came like someone knocked his legs out from under him. Straight for the old groove, he headed. He sort of half-kissed it at first, you know, with the very tip of his tongue. Jeezus, did he look ridiculous! But after a good taste he got courageous and energetic real fast, and within a couple of minutes he was lapping me up like a hungry kitten after warm milk. I must have had three orgasms. He was very good at it. In fact, he was a real expert. I regretted that I hadn't made use of his talents sooner.
"When I got my jollies the fourth time his lips drew on it and turned me on even more. His tongue whipped my cream into a froth. That was the best eatin' I ever had-made that botany prof a rank beginner. I stopped him just as he was breathin' hard and told him to stand up and remove his belt. This really confused the stupid jerk. 'Okay, dum-dum,' I said. 'You are going to give baby a damned good whipping for being so nasty and so very perverted. Fathers should punish their daughters when they have been so very, very wicked. The Bible says, "Spare the rod and spoil the child." '
"He really surprised the hell out of me. I cannot remember, before this time, when he had ever so much as laid a finger on me. I was sure that he would balk at the whipping bit. But no. He yanked his belt off with such force that he bust two loops from his trousers. And I shall never forget the look in his eyes-pure hate. I rolled over so that my ass and back were facing him, and he lashed out with that belt like a madman. Don't ask me why I enjoy being beaten on the ass, but, I love the pain-in fact, I orgasm during it continually. Pop wasn't aware of how much I loved it. He just slashed away at my buttocks with the belt, confident that he was properly punishing his wayward daughter for her sins. And the way he was doing it, I am sure that he was expiating a few of his own at the same time. All the time he was whipping me his jaw was grinding, and, considering what a 'pussycat' he really is, he looked terribly fierce. He injected comments like, "This will do you good, Doris. You need discipline. I see now that your mother and I have been too lenient with you. You need an iron hand, and by the Lord Jehovah, you are going to get it from now on, you wicked, wicked strumpet.' To this he added a multitude of biblical and mid-Victorian epithets.
"He really thought he was hurting me, and, physically, he was; but it was such mental pleasure! His belt stung, but as the repetition increased the throbs of pleasure were sweeter than a hot-fudge sundae. I began to groan like I was suffering something awful, but, in truth-I was orgasming, again and again. My cunt throbbed like there was a heart beating in it, and my legs felt numb and weak, I wanted to scream, 'Harder, hit me harder!! ' but I knew if I did, he would stop. I bit my tongue and he kept hitting me harder until he collapsed on the floor out of sheer exhaustion. My ass was bloody, but unbowed. I lay there on the couch, savoring every delicious spasm of pain. I felt wonderful.
"The next day I was too sore to go to school. I lay in bed most of the day-on my belly of course!-sort of daydreaming the time away with erotic thoughts of what had occurred the day before. I wondered why I hadn't thought of seducing my old man before. It was really something, seeing that weak-knead son-of-a-bitch quaking and quivering on his knees before me, shoving his tongue in and out of my cunt, giving me pleasure, and all because he was scared that I would show the pictures of him and Aunt Tessie to Mom. I had him where I wanted him, and little did I know that I would have him there for the next five years.
"About a week after this first encounter with Pop, I came home from school one warm, sunny, spring afternoon and Pop was in the kitchen. A half gallon of wine was on the table, and seated on a chair in front of it, with his head resting in his arms, was Pop. The bottle was almost three-quarters empty. I had never known Pop to be anything more than an occasional drinker, you know, parties, Christmas, etc. But it was obvious that this time he was pretty drunk.
"He raised his head at the sound of the screen door slamming shut, and his rheumy eyes scanned me with distaste from top to bottom. I smiled and said gaily, 'Hi, Pop!' He frowned. I walked past him quickly, but he reached out and took me by the arm.
" 'Witch,' he said. 'Spawn of the Devil. What have ye done to me that should cause me such torment?' He was speaking to me like someone out of another age.
"I said, 'Pop, you are drunk, let go of me.'
"He replied, 'What have you done to me that would cause me, thy father, to lust, like drunken Lot, for the body of my own flesh?'
"Then I understood. As aware as he was of the 'sin' he had committed, he lusted for me. The poor simple bastard liked it. I reached down, grabbed his flaccid rod, and gave it a vicious squeeze. With his free hand he belted me a hard one, right in the chops. I spun with the blow and fell backwards, hitting my head quite hard against the refrigerator. He jumped to his feet and caught me before I sagged to the floor. Picking me up, he carried me into my room and gently placed me on the bed. I heard him praying out loud. 'Dear God, forgive me, if I have killed her, my little daughter.' He went into the bathroom and I could hear him turn on the tap water. In a second or so, he returned, carrying in his hand a dripping, cold washrag. This he applied to my forehead.
"He was slowly and tenderly applying the cold cloth to my head when I was seized with the desire to make the bastard suffer, so I 'played dead' until I started to giggle at his anguish. Through my half-opened eyes I could see his look of grave concern turn to one of astonishment, and my giggles burst forth with such animation that the whole bed rocked. I threw my arms around his neck and pulled him down to me, planting a juicy kiss on his surprised mouth. At the same time, before he could attempt to pull himself back from me, I shoved my hand down his pants and seized his rod firmly. He responded immediately, and it began to harden. One thing about Pop: if he brushed his rod even against a tree stump he would get a hard on.
"He started to cry out, 'For God's sake, Doris, don't!' but the liquor and his deep-seated lust for me made him my sex slave once again. I knew that in spite of his conscience and all his hypocritical religious scruples he really enjoyed doing my bidding. His rod was quite hard now, and I skinned it back and forth with vigor. He was biting my neck in his passion and trying to pull down my panties at the same time. Quickly he got them down below my knees and his hand went straight for my cunt. I blocked his efforts with my hand. I wouldn't let him get in, just yet. He groaned in absolute frustration. Pop was really gonna sweat this one out if I had my way. But, I didn't expect him to get mean about it. We struggled for a few minutes and I was enjoying his frantic efforts to get a finger or two into my slot. Finally, with a great exertion of strength he grabbed me by both wrists and forced my arms back over my head. But he had a problem. He still had his pants on, and I could feel the rigid iron of his rod pressing against my cunt. I pushed my pelvis up against him, and it drove him wild. I was still holding out against him, and getting a real kick out of it, when he suddenly let go of one of my arms and slapped me hard on the cheek. It stung like blazes, but at the same time a tingle of delight went through my body and I experienced, for the first time, a sensation that could only be described as a 'miniorgasm.' As I recoiled in pain and pleasure, he quickly rose and doffed his pants and undershorts. His rod stuck out like a torpedo. I suddenly had the urge to suck it, and suck it violently. I got up to my knees on the bed and, grabbing Pop by the ass, pulled him to me once again. Then I lowered my lips over the swollen head of his rod. He sighed as I started pulling on it like a newborn calf on a cow's teat. I let my teeth scrape its tender surface, and he let out a little scream. I bit a little harder, and he responded by bashing me on the side of my head with a closed fist. I saw stars for a few seconds and got a flash of excitement. I sucked harder and chewed his rod a little bit more. I felt his legs and stomach stiffen, and he belted me again. My ears were ringing, but I felt all the more excited. I felt the head of his rod swell to gigantic proportions and knew he was just about ready to come. I slowed down on my oral manipulations and felt the throbbing in his rod subside.
"I withdrew my lips and he sighed. 'Doris, Doris, please don't stop! God, forgive me, but I don't want you to stop.'
"I was breathing hard and felt like I was going to great out any second. I took the opportunity to pull my panties off and pull my dress over my head. As the fabric caressed my breasts, I knew my nipples were erect, like tiny hard ons. The whole area of my groin was damp with passion juice. I threw the dress and panties to one side and, lying down on my back, drew Pop to me once again, only this time I directed his head towards my groin. His tongue was rough, hot, and eager as it entered my slot. Pop was sure excited. He blew into my crack and caused my insides to inflate like a balloon. It felt great. I grabbed his hair and pulled him against me tightly, so as to allow no air to escape. He started to lap at my cunt, and the excitement sent thrills to my head, all the way from the tip of my toes.
"The more he dug his tongue into me the more frantic I got, for it was like a great tidal wave was engulfing me and carrying me far out into a sea of psychedelic rainbows. I started to beat Pop on the head with my fists, but that only made him slow down and I wanted him to go much faster. I had a feeling like I was running after a train that was just leaving the station and the harder I ran the faster it moved away from me, and though I tried my best, I knew deep down inside that it was going to leave me behind. I didn't want that to happen now. I was working up to the biggest orgasm of my life, and I didn't want to goof it.
"I grabbed hold of Pop's ears and lifted him out of my groin. 'You're going to beat me, do you understand? Hurt me, dear Poppa, punish your dirty, sick little girl!' I was pleading with him, but he just looked at me, shaking his head no, and trying to force his head back down to my cunt. The sonuvabitch liked it. I was almost in tears, not knowing what to do. Then the idea of baiting him flashed through my mind. 'You dirty cunt-lapper, hit me!' He still didn't move.
'You filthy, cocksucking, mother-fucker.' Still no response. 'You'd fuck God, if he bent over, you faggot bastard!' That did it!
"He straightened up and with a cry of rage seized me by the throat and started to strangle me. I kicked him hard, right in the balls, and as he writhed in pain, I started to scratch his face. He released me with his hands and started to flail at me with his fists. I collapsed on the bed, cowering under the raining blows, and suddenly I felt numb. I didn't feel the smashing of his fists anymore. I felt like I had been forgiven for being me. I reached total orgasm. I felt hot, then icy cold, then warm, then cool. I felt like I was falling into an endless tunnel, then like I was a shooting star! I felt so clean, so pure, so lovely. Then I seemed to sink into a deep, dreamless sleep, although I could hear Pop's voice calling to me. He sounded a thousand miles away. I had the awareness to realize that he had stopped hitting me.
"It took me a little longer to recover from this beating. I think Pop was beginning to enjoy this aspect. He certainly did me up royally. I was sore for a week. We both explained to Mom that I had been beaten up during a student riot at school. She believed us and was ready to sue the city, the tactical police force, and the school administration. We calmed her down and she accepted the reasons for my two black eyes and my swollen jaw. Pop didn't speak to me for some time afterwards. He spent a lot of time praying and begging the Lord for forgiveness, but anytime I got horny, he was there, Johnny-on-the-spot. I think he was being torn a bit apart by the whole relationship. But I could care less. I, a sixteen-year-old girl, had more balls than he had in his forty-odd years. If he wasn't such a whimpering chickenshit I might have respected him a little, but the way he groveled in front of me made me feel only disgust and contempt.
"Several times I found my room searched, and knew that he was looking for the incriminating pictures I had taken of him and Tessie. I decided that I was tired of finding my room a mess, so I did a brazen thing the following night at the supper table. Mom was dishing out the mashed potatoes and gravy when I reached into, my jeans pocket and handed Pop an envelope across the table. 'I think you've been looking for these,' I cooed, innocently, and the look on Pop's face was hysterically funny as he removed the photo prints from the envelope. At the first glance, he shoved them back in the envelope so fast that he cut his fingers on the edge of the paper. He turned white, then scarlet, and sputtered incoherent words. With shaking hands he placed them into his coat pocket. Mom looked up from what she was serving and said, 'What is it, dear? An important letter or something?' Pop mustered up a squeaking reply about it being some church news and stared at his roast beef, mashed potatoes, and gravy. I thought he was going to throw up.
"Pop thought that I had let him off of the hook, but I just tried a new tack. The thing that had bound him to me as a sex slave was my possession of the incriminating photographs. But I was bored. I wanted some strange stuff for a while, and I also knew that I would drive him batty if I cut him off, even though he thought that he was giving in to me against his will.
"I decided that I would tease him by letting him know that I was fucking some of the best studs in the neighborhood. When I would go out on dates I would always manage to return slightly disheveled, and on more than one occasion I turned up with a few bruises, accommodatingly supplied by my date of the evening. I was right in my assumption. I would find him looking at me longingly, with that same stupid, lustful stare. I would stare right back at him and he would drop his eyes. He just couldn't figure out why I had seemingly lost all desire for him. This, of course, affected whatever ego he had. This obvious rejection troubled him, Christian ethics and morality be damned. The sonuvabitch was hotter than hell for me, and that was all there was to it. I let him suffer for quite some time, before I gave in to his silent wish. The time I did, the poor bastard thought that he had raped me. I'm sure his conscience bugged him after that.
"This is how it had happened. I had come in from a date with Charlie R--. Charlie was a switch-hitter. What I mean by that is that he dug boys as well as girls. He was effeminate to the point of being almost revolting, and I knew Pop hated him with a fervor. Charlie was twenty-six and looked sixteen. A hairdresser by profession and a watercolorist by avocation. He was a typical 'intellectual-fairy' type. He was blonde and thin and had a slender waist and rather large lips. I think if he had taken a few male hormone shots, it might have helped him. He looked like he was living on a diet of strictly female hormones. Pop winced every time
Charlie called.
"But for my purposes, Charlie was 'all man,' or at least man enough for me. If the most dedicated homosexual in the world can 'get it up' for me when I place my full red lips around it, he's got enough going for him to please me. Charlie loved to be blown. He used some kind of male perfume that really turned me on.
"The one instance that really shook Pop up happened after Charlie had brought me home, quite late one evening. We had been to a drive-in and the second feature was a real dud. Our boredom caused us to think of other things; before long we were in the back seat of Charlie's Dodge and he was licking the hell out of my cunt. In fact, we were going at it with such passion that the windows of the car steamed up to where we couldn't have seen the movie screen if we had wanted to. Anyway, as I was saying, Charlie brought me home and I invited him in for a coke. Mom was already in bed, but the light shining under the door from Pop's room showed me that he was still up, and probably doin' his Bible reading.
"While I was going to the icebox to get the cokes, Charlie excused himself to go to the toilet. He left the door open and I could see his pants piled around the lower parts of his legs, and his shiny, pink knees. I opened the bottles and decided to take his coke to him. I went into the bathroom and handed him his coke. I stood there a moment, just talking small talk and gazing every so often at his magnificent rod that hung down so far that it almost reached the water level of the toilet bowl. I impishly reached down between his legs and touched it.
Charlie gave a start, then smiled and said, 'Do it again.' I did, and before I knew it, I was on my knees, between his legs, and had the whole sweet shaft of his in my mouth. He got so excited as I pulled on it that his arm flailed out and knocked over a bottle of mouthwash that was on the top of the tank. I heard the loud crash, but I was getting my jollies chewing on his rod, and didn't think to close the bathroom door. Well, the noise brought Pop out of his room, and when he saw us in this rather compromising position, all hell broke loose. He picked Charlie up, right off the toilet seat, dragged him through the house, with his pants all tangled around his ankles, and threw him out of the house and into the driveway. Charlie got up and, trying to pull up his trousers, jumped into his car, backed out of the driveway, and peeled rubber for half a block getting out of there. I noticed as he got into the car that his rod was still fully extended and hard as ever. For a semifag, he was quite a man. He never came back to the house again, and I can't say that I blame him very much.
"Pop was furious. When he returned to the house, he dragged me to my room by the hair. As soon as we were in the room, he started to slap me around something awful. I was in tears. He really lit into me, but I noticed that he was breathing hard, and not from the physical exertion of batting me about. I looked at his pajama pants. Sure enough, his rod was as hard as Charlie's and was pokin' out through the fly. The sonuvabitch must have gotten turned on, watching me blow Charlie.
"I started to laugh, and Pop stopped hitting me. He saw me looking down at his big hard on and his face tinged crimson. With one hand holding my mashed and bleeding lip, and the other reaching out for his rod, Pop had had it! The same old longing flashed across his face. The longing manifested by memories, too recent. I had him once again where I wanted him. This time he was not being held prisoner by blackmailing photos, but by the self-commitment of his own lust.
" 'Spank me, Pop, for I've been a bad little slut.'
"He quietly pulled his belt from the loops, and I lay down on the floor and pulled my panties down below my knees. My whole body tingled with delicious expectation.
"I wasn't disappointed-he let me have it but good! My ass grew redder with each swat of the leather belt. I was excited, sexually, almost instantaneously. The belt left deep welts in the whiteness of my bottom, and I looked like the lower half of a U.S. flag in that area. I came at least a dozen times before his arms gave out with the strain. I was almost delirious from the delightful pain. He fell down on me and, placing one arm across the small of my back and the other across the back of my thighs, he began kissing the bloody welts on my butt. I whimpered with passion, and he started moving up my back with his lips until he was warmly kissing the back of my neck. At the same time he was taking off his pants and shorts. I felt the soft smooth touch of his rod slightly penetrate the crack of my ass. I figured that he wanted me dog-fashion and was about to mention to him that he was aiming too high, when it suddenly dawned on me that my cunt wasn't the target that he had in mind. The sonuvabitch wanted to bugger me in the ass-hole.
"I'd never had it that way before, and though I was a little tense at the beginning, I finally relaxed and let him shove it in. It was a thrilling sensation, and it hurt a lot. Of course, my butt got in the way, so he couldn't shove it in all the way, which I was sure he would've loved to do. It was a different kind of pain, but the sensation was terrific. I had an intense longing to have another rod in my cunt at the same time, but Pop was only human. I guided his hand to my crotch and he stuck his middle finger in deeply until it reached the tip of my womb. When he would pull back with his rod he would push with his finger, and the effect was absolutely groovy. I don't know what book he had read, or how he got the idea, but I sure was not in a mood for complaining. This double fucking was great. I had a massive orgasm and screwed my ass-hole tight, until he yelped. He sure couldn't stand any pain whatsoever. Finally, he came, deep inside my ass. I pushed his hand close to my cunt and yelled, 'Finger-fuck me faster!' Which he did.
"All during this act, he was crying, 'Doris, I love you, I love you! I know this is sinful, but, God knows I love you and will forgive us. We shall go away, where no one will ever know. Your mother will never find us.'
"But Mom did find us, and unfortunately it was right after that stupid sonuvabitch had made his little speech. She had come home unexpectedly, and hearing the noises coming from the bedroom, decided to snoop. At first she was too shocked to do anything but stand there and hold her breath. Then her eyes fell upon the recently discarded belt. She seized it and began to beat the living shit out of Pop. He screamed like a frightened broad and pulled out of me immediately. As he rolled off me, I thought Mom was going to let me have it, too. But she kept on slashing away at Pop with the belt.
"Mom's screaming epithets were for him alone. Then it dawned on me . ... She thought he was raping me. I was delighted with the mis-judgment on her part and immediately began sobbing, like the poor abused, teenaged victim of paternal lust-which I most certainly wasn't. Pop was yelling that 'Doris made me do it . ... Doris is the daughter of the Devil-and he made me do it!' The chickenshit bastard was making all kinds of excuses and Mom didn't believe a single one of them. I played innocent and when my mom called the cops and had Pop jailed for rape and incest, I testified at the trial. Pop's lawyer tried to establish the fact that I had seduced him, but the jury, who seemed disgusted with him in the first place, wouldn't buy it. Pop got twenty years for it. He went a little buggy, and now he is in a state hospital for the criminally insane. Serves the stupid bastard right."
Doris C-possesses just about every one of the sadomasochistic traits known to medical science. The fact that she was able to achieve orgasm through being severely beaten (masochism) does not mitigate in the least her sadistic predilections. The sadist and the masochist are intrinsically one and the same. She was eighteen years of age at the time she dictated the preceding account. Doris was a plain and unduly unattractive girl with harsh features and a rather broad, thick build, and she seemed determined to lend a bad impression of herself. If she had any redeeming qualities whatever, she was very careful to conceal them.
Surprisingly enough, her I.Q. was well above average, which her attitude and hostility towards the interviewer belied. Pugnacious in nature, she was given to using masculine metaphors in general conversation (rod, cunt, fuck, etc.), and admitted to being envious of males (indicative of "penis envy"). In reference to this she stated: "Yeah, I've often wished that I had been born a guy. Men have it made. They can stick their dick into anything and get away with it. No babies. No messy monthly pads. More money and a lot more fun. A guy's a big fuckin' hero if he's balled twenty or thirty girls; they call a chick"that does the same a slut, or worse. That's not very fair, a broad's screwed from the time that she is born."
Doris wanted to be a male, she envied the masculine freedom and independence. Therefore, she chose to dominate, and her weak-willed father provided the perfect outlet. In her ability to browbeat, humiliate, and negate him and his manliness, she, in turn, became partly male in the process.
In denigrating and demeaning her own father, the full symbol of paternal and masculine authority, by mental, physical, and verbal means (such as referring to him as "dum-dum."
"shit-head" and "sonuvabitch") she increased her lust for domination. In coercing him, first by blackmail, and then by utilizing his own weakness, she made him feel physically inferior. The more she emasculated him, the more she "masculated" herself. She certainly displayed no remorse or shame for her actions.
To label her "psychotic" in this sense would be perfectly correct, but one could almost be assured that latent lesbianism was also coming to the forefront; though, probably due to a lack of lesbian experience at the time, she was unaware of the subconscious desire to "become a man" in the full sense.
In order to understand the situation a little more clearly, let us interject now the narrative of Clarence C-, the father of our subject.
"Doris was as fine a daughter as a man could want until she was about fifteen or so. Then she seemed to grow hard, to become very old for her age, to become disrespectful of her elders, and-I suppose one might call it that-over-sophisticated. She began to think it was clever and cute to inject four-letter words into her telephone conversations with her girl friends and some of the boys she knew. I frequently reprimanded her about this unlady-like quality, and her reply, usually when my wife Betsy was well out of earshot, was, 'Fuck you, Pop!' She had, for the most part of her life called me 'Daddy,' but now she called me 'Pop' in the first person, and 'my ol' man' in the third. I couldn't understand why she had changed so, but I said little, in order to keep things peaceful. I guess that was my first mistake. Betsy was going through menopause and was extremely difficult to get along with. She cared nothing about sex, and when we did indulge, it was ever so grim.
"Betsy was terribly afraid of pregnancy. Because of ovarian cysts, she was afraid to use the pill. I disliked rubbers, and pulling out in time always frustrated both of us. I submitted to a vasectomy, for her sake, but her sexual desire faded as the years went on until she reached a state of absolute frigidity. Life was hell for me then. I am a very sexual person. I feel that the enjoyment of copulation is a gift of God, and I treasure any gift and make use of it.
"About this time-it had been almost a year since I had had any kind of sex relations with my wife-her youngest sister, Tess, had lost her husband in Vietnam. We sort of took to each other, and soon took to meeting-very discreetly, of course-and indulging in sex acts, which comforted us both, and, of course, solved our mutual problem. And then, one afternoon we made the tragic mistake of rendezvousing in our home. Doris came home from school early and found us locked in sexual embrace. Neither her aunt nor myself heard or saw her enter. She procured her Polaroid camera and took several shots of us, locked in erotic positions. The little bitch! The unscrupulous little vixen! After Tess had left, Doris approached me with one of the damaging photographs. I grabbed it from her and tore it up, but sneeringly she informed me that she had many more. She threatened to show them to Betsy, her mother, if I did not give in to her whims. The thought of the reaction of my sweet, ill Betsy to these filthy pictures drove me almost to distraction. I was taken aback, for I knew full well that Doris never bluffed. If she said that she was going to do a certain thing, hell nor high water could prevent her from doing so. I was petrified. I thought of killing her, so desperate was I, but was murder any better than incest or adultery? I figured that it wasn't, and underneath it all, I am a God-fearing man!
"So I gave in to her; I surrendered my pride and dignity, my mind and body, as sacrifices on the altar of her sexual madness. She then forced me from that afternoon on to defile myself with acts so vile and depraved that they defy imagination. She made me beat her, and she was, like the 'whore of Babylon,' so depraved and debauched that she was able to receive the ultimate in sexual gratification from the very rain of blows from my belt.
"I would be lying if I said I was not aroused physically by this contact. This vile creature made me often forget that she was of my flesh and blood. She had ways of arousing lust from a corpse, I do believe. But, even as my sterile sperm would gush into her, I would invoke heaven for forgiveness and release from my bondage. I truly deplored the spasmodic stabbings of my ejaculations.
"Her foulest bent, though, for me, was to press my mouth to her genital lips and slide my tongue over and around her clitoral prominence. She would achieve countless orgasms in this fashion, and my mouth and face would be inundated with her nauseous genital juices. This went on for several years, and then, suddenly, my wife died. I went to her sister Tess and told her the whole filthy story. She suggested that I obtain treatment for Doris. I didn't get off that easy. I, too, carry emotional scars.
Though I want to marry Tess, and for once be happy, I do not dare, for this experience has left me completely impotent!"
Clarence C-was needlessly tortured and victimized. That his daughter had a diabolically powerful advantage over him with the photographic proof of his adultery, cannot be denied. But a normally strict, aggressive, and self-contained male would have demanded the rest of the photos when she first threatened him with them. For a sixteen-year-old juvenile to gain and maintain such malevolent control over a mature male, some personality imbalance must be present in the adult's own character. We suspect that his avowed "reprimand" was more intended than carried out; or, if he did discipline or correct her, that it was done so weakly or effeminately that it aroused contempt rather than respect. It is more than possible that had Clarence C-been a strong and authoritative paternal agent, Doris might have passed through the critical metamorphosis stage (from adolescence to young womanhood, a period when a tendency towards neurosis is quite common) without regressing and then fixating into the unchangeable mold of the psychopath.
There is also the obvious possibility that Doris possessed strong, but extremely latent, lesbian tendencies, tendencies that she never actualized outwardly, but did so only inwardly through her sadomasochistic treatment of her amenable but morally and spiritually weak father.
Her psychosis is patently infantile; she dominates as a child dominates-out of a petulant need to be continually supplied with what she wants.
A child often not only expects punishment for wrongdoing but wants to be duly punished; the wrong is thereby assuaged and the child's conscience soothed. Doris, true to the masochists' creed, wanted to be severely punished for her flagrant and wanton actions-and the pain of this wanted punishment was so satisfying and appreciated that she was able to have orgasm and get release as its climactic effect.
With proper treatment, perhaps Clarence C can be cured of his "impotency," if it is, as we suspect, triggered by his traumatic experience with his depraved and wanton offspring. To find out how this tragic thing happened to Clarence C-, let us continue with Doris C-'s intriguing and bizarre narrative.
"Don't get the idea that I was 'queer' for Pop. As a sex symbol, he was punk, but the sonuvabitch sure knew how to lap my pussy. I don't know if I hated him really; it was just that I had no damn respect for such a willy-nilly, cowardly, spineless individual. When I had shown him the photos, he should have beat the hell out of me and made me turn the stuff over to him right then and there. But, he wouldn't. If he had demanded them with any conviction, I would have given all of them to him, but when I watched him cringe, turn white in the face, and almost faint, I had to dig into him. I knew that he hadn't laid Mom for quite some time, and that he had been balling Aunt Tessie within days after Uncle Clyde got his in Indo-China. It pissed me off that he would screw right in
Mom's bed. That was just too much.
"At first the idea of making him go down on me seemed rather repulsive. After all, I was raised to be a good Christian girl-unfortunately, I wasn't though!-and though it may seem unbelievable, I do have a conscience.
"All I knew was that I wanted to humiliate him. When I did, I found out that it was a groovy feeling. I knew what I was doing was wrong, and I longed to be punished for it, and a lot more things that no one, for the most part, knew about. I finally had to beg him to beat me. When he finally lost his temper and lit into me so violently, I really creamed my jeans. I felt, in addition to the thrill that I somehow got through the inflicted pain, that Pop was acting like a father should when his child is naughty.
"I had seen him take so much shit from Mom, just because she was having a rough time with her change of life. The poor bastard even had himself tied off, and still she wouldn't have anything to do with him sexually. She'd just bitch, bitch, bitch, and he would cringe and silently submit to all her irrational whims. I began to wonder if he had had a castration by mistake, instead of a simple vasectomy.
"I wasn't a virgin when I got myself fucked by Pop. I think that I mentioned the botany teacher, and, of course, Charlie, the fag switch-hitter, but there were many others. I really feel that I have had my share. I also found out that, on occasion, I like girls, too. It's funny how I discovered that quirk in my nature.
"It started with Sheila. She was a school chum of mine. About five feet three inches in height, with amber hair cut very short, and a pair of boobs that would drive you nuts. I found myself strangely attracted to her, and we hit it off great from the first introduction. Queer Charlie introduced us one hot afternoon at the beach. Sheila was a familiar figure around school, but she was rather standoffish and, indeed, she had few friends. I never saw her date anyone of the crowd. But I felt drawn to her, like she was my long lost sister or something. I supposed that she was a strange and lonely girl.
"One day, I went over to her house in the late afternoon. We had arranged to do our homework together. I knocked at the door and Sheila called from somewhere within the house to come in. I entered and walked down the hallway to her room. My eyes popped open when I stepped into her room. She was lying on the bed, stark-naked, and was running a black rubber thing in and out of her cunt. I later learned that this was called a 'dildo' and we would use it on each other many, many times in the future. At first I was shocked, but then I burst out laughing! 'Don't knock it till you've tried it!' came the reply between gasps of breath. I guessed she was just about ready to come any second.
"I replied, 'Don't mind if I do.' Sheila pulled the thing out of her cunt and tossed it to me. It was hot with friction, and slippery. I tossed the thing back to her and started stripping off my clothes. Once nude, I crawled in alongside her. Her body was cool with sweat, and as our flesh touched I felt a tingle go through me.
"I rolled on my back and spread my legs, and Sheila slowly thrust the thing into me. I was tense with the sense of being entered by something very strange. If it had a body attached to it on the other end, it would have felt more familiar, but this thing, hard as it was, was lifeless. It is strange to look up through half-closed eyes, feeling a hard rod inside of you, and see absolutely nothing. It's like being fucked by a phantom dick.
"Sheila began moving the thing back and forth within me, and my lubricating juices started flowing. Then she straddled me and sat down on my legs; this increased the agitation somewhat. But it looked even stranger than no one at all-to see a gorgeous hunk of female sitting on top of you, shoving an eight-inch rod into you. I found myself rolling my hips to increase the rhythm of the dildo. Sheila leaned over and started sucking on my eager nipples. I was thrilled. I never realized that a girl could thrill me as much as a man.
"I grew expectant for orgasm and arched my back in anticipation, but, just as I was about to spasm, Sheila quickly withdrew the dildo, scooted down to my groin, and stuck her tongue in between my cunt lips. God, it felt good! I felt like I was being engulfed by a tidal wave. I was totally submerged in exotic passion. That first experience with a lesbian would never be repeated.
"We continued these erotic activities until suppertime. Sheila's mother returned, and I was invited to join them for supper. I accepted, and all through the delicious dinner, right on down to the dessert, my mind was full of thoughts of me fucking Sheila with the dildo, of Sheila fucking me with the dildo, of Sheila sucking on my cunt, of me sucking on hers, of sucking each other's, simultaneously. Rubbing, caressing, kissing, and the sublime experience of mutual orgasm. This, plus the tenderness that only two women can achieve together, made my heart beat faster. I looked across the table to Sheila and smiled. She knew what was going on in my mind and winked back at me.
"My relationship with Sheila lasted for several months. Nothing tragic broke us up. Sheila's father was offered a better position in another city and they moved there. Feeling that relations with another woman would never equal the thing that Sheila and I had going for us, I resumed sexual activities with males I knew, and, of course, with dear ol' Pop.
"After Sheila had been gone for some time I told Pop, after one of our typical sexual flings, about Sheila and myself. I thought that he would vomit. We had reached the stage now where he went through the whole sex-beating routine without a whit of self-reproach. I was getting bored. If I didn't make him sweat, it wasn't much fun. Besides, his attitude was beginning to become one of 'I don't think she really deserves punishment this severe.' Of course, that put a damper on the whole thing. I had to come up with new ways of humiliating this jellyfish, who supposedly was my father.
"One night I was having him lap my pussy. Trying to inject a little novelty into it, I had him lying on his back on my bedroom floor. I was squatting down, well positioned over his head, when I had the fierce urge to urinate. I was just about to stand up and go to the bathroom to accomplish this, when I was seized by a wild idea.
"His dick was hard, there before my eyes, and he was jacking himself off at the same time he was eating me. I saw the head swell and turn crimson as he was preparing to ejaculate. I waited till the precise moment he started to shoot, and then I let loose. I pissed right down on his face. The poor sonuvabitch nearly drowned in it. He choked, retched, and sputtered. His dick went immediately soft, right in the midst of his ejaculation. The sticky sperm spread over his lower abdomen, and then, as his rod whipped back in retraction, it smeared a gob on his hairy leg. I laughed so hard that I fell to the floor. Wiping the urine from his eyes, he glared at me, and his whole body shook with rage. 'Doris, goddamn you-that wasn't the least bit funny!' He rose and padded into the bathroom, and a second later I heard him start to shower.
"Five minutes later he reappeared, somewhat calmed down and dressed in his dressing gown. I waited for him to belt me one, for this was abject humiliation that I had subjected him to. But nothing happened. He stood before my mirror and began combing his hair.
" 'Ain't you going to hit me for that one, Pop?' I taunted him.
"He didn't move. 'No, Doris, I am not.'
"I was stunned. He quietly walked out of my room and down the hall. I was furious-and frustrated.
"For several weeks after that, Pop avoided me like the very plague. Mom wasn't feeling very well and was home most every night. She had been very active until recently with her bridge club, church work, and coffee klatches. She didn't look good at all. She had lost a lot of weight and had big black circles under both eyes. Pop was beside himself with anguish. She refused to see our doctor and took to spending more and more time secluded in her room. One day she asked Pop to send for Aunt Tessie. He did. She arrived four days later and started looking after Mom. This was the first time she had returned to the house since my photographic foray into their little affair, Pop's and hers.
"Pop made it a point to never be alone in the house with me. I couldn't let him get away with it. I knew that, somewhere, he and Tessie were fucking up a storm. They conceivably could be using the storeroom that was part of the garage out back. My suspicions were correct, for late one night I saw a light shining in the garage. I stole from my bed and sneaked out across the backyard. Creeping up to the garage door on all fours, I peeked through a large crack in the wall. It was Pop and Aunt Tessie. Pop was sitting on the floor with his hands out behind him for support. Tessie was there in her frilly pink nightgown. Pop had only his pajama top on. The bottoms were carefully laid out over the fender of the car. I noticed that an old mattress was beneath them. Tessie was on her knees, bending over Pop's lower extremities. Her nightgown hung down away from her and I could see her gorgeous breasts hanging down free. The coral nipples were erect with excitement, and no wonder about the cause for that. She was sucking on Pop's stiff rod with great delight. Pop's head was thrown back and a grin of pleasure was stretched from ear to ear. Almost without realizing it, my hand stole down to my cunt. It was moist already. I started fingering it, and got quite a thrill by masturbating in rhythm with the erotic scene before my eyes.
"Tessie's head began to bob up and down faster and faster. Pop's hands dug into the sides of the old mattress until I thought the veins in his arms and neck would start to pop! Pop shot his load into Aunt Tessie's mouth with such force that she was unable to contain it. It splurted out and dripped down the shaft of his rod and ran into his pubic hair. He straightened up and, seizing her head between his hands, forced her mouth down to the base of his rod. Tessie couldn't breathe and she struggled to free herself before she suffocated. While all this was going on, I was finger-fucking to beat the band. Suddenly a twig snapped behind me and I turned to see Mom standing behind me. How long she had been there, I didn't know, but I am sure it was long enough to see everything I was doing to myself. Just then, Pop, the stupid bastard, let out a long satisfied moan. This sound directed Mom's attention from me to the garage door. I took the opportunity to stand up and lean against it, to try to keep my mother from entering. As luck would have it, the door opened inwards, and I fell through it, landing smack on my back.
"Tessie was licking up Pop's sperm. They both looked startled as they saw the grim vision of my enraged mother standing in the doorway. None of us was able to utter a sound. Pop looked as if he were going to have a heart attack. Tessie's face broke out into an embarrassed grin, complete with dripping sperm. It looked like she had been eating soft ice cream. Mom let out a muffled 'Agggh!' and fled back into the house.'
"I looked at Pop and then at Tessie. For a second, I felt a bit of compassion for them, but only briefly. "The fat's in the fire, now,' I said.
"Tessie looked at me brazenly, wiped her dripping chin with one arm, and flounced off to the house. Pop got shakily to his feet and attempted to put his pajama pants back on, falling on his ass, twice, in the process. It had finally happened ... what he had feared all these years. And I wasn't the one responsible. He came over to me and buried his head in my shoulder. 'Oh, Doris, what in God's name are we going to do now?' He was sobbing like a little boy. I was almost moved to pity, if I had had any for him! But I hadn't. The only reason I tried to keep Mom from going into the garage was to protect her, certainly not the other two! I pushed Pop from me and he sank to the floor, blubbering.
"The house was strangely quiet the next few days. Tessie packed the next morning and took a cab to the airport. Mom stayed in her room all day, reading the Bible. Pop went to work and didn't get home till almost midnight, and when he came in, he was so drunk that he staggered. He went immediately to Mom's room and whispered through the door, 'Betsy, forgive me, I didn't mean it. It will never happen again. Please let me in . ... Oh, God, forgive this innocent sinner. I didn't know what I was doing. ... It was all her fault ... Tessie's. Honest, Betsy ... please ... please ... please!! '
"Nothing but silence from Mom's room.
"Suddenly Pop turned and faced me. 'You,' he said. 'It's your fault that all this happened. You little depraved whore, you debauched bitch, it is all your fault. Do you hear me? All your fault!' He lunged at me and began beating me with both fists. One fist landed smack on my mouth. I felt several teeth break and I think my jaw cracked. I was frightened. I had done nothing except try to keep Mom from finding out. I had no feeling of guilt whatsoever. I think Pop would have killed me had not Mom come from her room and heaved her Bible and caught Pop on the back of the head. It was a rather heavy one, not the motel type you and I are familiar with.
"That had a traumatic effect on Pop. He never hit me again-unless I deserved it. Life was hell around the house for the next few months. For a short time I even became 'anti-sex.' It just wasn't worth the bother. I guess if I were a guy, knocking off a piece whenever I wanted to, and then either tossing the chick out of the car or turning over and going to sleep (it's all the same for the chick, you know), it might have been all right. I thought about Sheila. I couldn't figure out why I was so attracted to her. I knew I was not a les. I enjoyed a stiff rod too much for that, but yet, the memory of Sheila's tongue in my snatch . ... Boy, that was something.
"Mom was getting worse all the time. We finally called the doctor, and after he had examined her he told us that he could find nothing organically wrong with her, it was just that she had no longer any desire to live and was just wasting away. He suggested a sanatorium, but Pop would not even think of such a thing. He was drunk most of the time and had taken a leave of absence from the factory. He just laid around the house all day soaking up cheap wine by the gallon and half gallon and pacing back and forth in front of Mom's room. Mom only came out of her room when he was out of the house.
"But all of Pop's drive was sexual. I could tell as days went by-he would get hornier and hornier. Tessie wasn't here to suck him off, but she wrote to him three or four times a week, and whatever was in those letters sure turned him on. I was getting pretty horny myself by then. Most of my friends were out of town for the summer, so I couldn't ball around with them. It began to look like Pop was my only outlet, and he didn't seem the least bit interested anymore. Even when he firmly protested before, I knew deep down inside that the sonuvabitch was relishing the 'ravishing' of pore li'l ol' me. I had to figure some way to turn him on. After all, you can't get fucked very well by a soft dick.
"Then, one day, luck beckoned to me. I had been cleaning house and had walked into the bathroom to hang up fresh towels when I surprised Pop in the process of acute masturbation. He stood there, holding up a picture and pulling away at his rod with great vigor. I circled around behind him and glanced over his shoulder. It was a picture of Tessie, dear Aunt Tessie, and in the nude. She must have taken the picture herself, as she was lying on a bed with her legs spread apart and her cunt wide open. In her left hand she was holding a cord, which obviously was attached to the shutter of the camera. In her right hand, she was holding a glass of what looked like champagne. She looked very sexy. It must have driven my old man wild.
"I stooped down and moved around in front of him. His eyes were closed tightly now; he was so intent on the picture and what he was doing that he never noticed me at all-not until I kissed the head of his dick passionately. I thought he would come right then and there.
" 'Oh, no, Doris-please!' He did not sound very convincing. He let his hand drop from his stiff dick and I let my lips slide down its length. 'Not here, Doris, not here,' he said hoarsely. 'Let's go out to the storeroom.'
"I agreed. I was so horny, I think I would have enjoyed even a straight fuck, even from him!
"Taking a clean, fresh towel with me, I followed him out to the yard. I observed that his rod was so hard that he had trouble walking normally. The garage door always opened with a loud squeak. Pop was careful, but it still squeaked as we entered and shut it behind us. I had my clothes off in a jiffy and was lying on the mattress by the time he had completely disrobed.
"As he started to climb on top of me, I said, 'Eat me, Pop, suck my cunt the way that you used to.' When he balked, I countered with, 'Eat me, or zap! I call Mom, and I will tell her that you are raping me!'
"He whimpered and in a shaky voice said, 'All right, Doris, you win-again.'
"He bent down to me and inserted his rough, wine-smelly tongue into my moist crack. I started to get excited. He continued lapping me for another ten minutes or so, and then I told him to stop and put his rod into me good, because I was more than ready. He moved into position and shoved it home! It felt wonderful-just like old times. As soon as he entered I achieved a massive orgasm. I grunted and groaned and swivel-hipped him to a feverish pitch and still he wouldn't come. Oh God, how I wanted, after all this time, to feel that sterile sperm of his gush into me. I was writhing with pleasure when he gave one gigantic lunge and shot his whole wad! It felt sooooooo great. I hadn't had anyone come inside me for months. I'm not on the pill, 'cause I never needed it with Pop. Most strangers, I make them use rubbers or pull out, just prior to ejaculation.
"I reached a beautiful orgasm and was just beginning to relax and enjoy the divine aftereffects, when a slight noise caused me to open my eyes. Even before I did that, I knew just exactly what I was going to see. It was Mom-and in a flash she swung high and brought a steel rake, prongs down, crashing into Pop's naked and sweaty back! He screamed and fell off me. Ten holes in his back started squirting blood at the same time. Mom looked at me, like she didn't know me, and muttered something about Tess. Then she put the rake back on the nail that it always hung from and walked slowly back into the house.
"I looked at Pop. He was out like a light, but still breathing, and though the wounds looked terrible and lots of blood was in sight, I knew that he was not too badly injured.
"I ran into the house after Mom. She had locked herself in her room. She would not open the door in spite of my begging her to. I ran outside and back into the storeroom. Pop was coming to. I helped him to his feet and we ran back into the house. But by the time he had smashed the door in, it was too late. Mom was stretched out on the bed. She was still warm. An empty bottle, that exuded a familiar but oddly elusive odor was there, beside her. By the time the ambulance arrived, she was pronounced dead. I was sick with grief. I always felt that Mom loved me about as much as she loved Pop, which wasn't much, but, still, she was my mother, and though we hardly ever saw eye-to-eye on many subjects, she was-well-still my mother.
"Aunt Tess came, of course, to the funeral. She was a great comfort to Pop, that was for sure. I overheard them talking about going away together for a while. I was furious. I would not allow that to happen. No matter how lily-livered he was, he was my father, and I'd be damned in hell forever before I would allow her to take him away from me. That night I sat up late trying to figure out what to do. I decided that I would fix them both. I went into the bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet and withdrew Pop's straightedge razor from its case. I opened it. Its shiny, sharp blade glistened in the light. I crept down the hall and into Pop's bedroom. Just as I figured ... she was in bed with him. I pulled the sheets down from their bodies. Both were totally nude. Pop was lying on his back. His rod looked like a white snake, lying there in the moonlight. I picked it up by its head. It was lifeless and flaccid. I raised my arm, just like it had a sabre in it, and prepared to swing down and finish off that erring tool of his. I glanced at Aunt Tessie . ... She was staring at me with eyes filled with terror. I started my downward swing and she screamed and threw up an arm, which blocked my attempt to sever that cock from its worthless owner. Tess's scream awoke Pop, and with a well-placed kick to my abdomen, he knocked me across the room. The razor went flying from my grip and landed in a corner of the room. I fell to the floor and hysterically started to sob.
"I faintly overheard the conversation that took place over the next few minutes. I think Pop was telling Tessie about the whole situation that had been going on for the last few years. I also remember hearing Aunt Tessie pick up the phone and ask for the police.
"I've been here in the hospital for quite some time now. The prognosis is that I am 'psychotic' and need constant and extensive treatment. It isn't so bad here. Food is all right, I guess. We get movies, twice weekly and then there is Edna, she is in the bed next to me. She isn't pretty. She isn't young, but, her tongue sure fits in my groove real nice."
Doris C-is completely homicidal as well as being afflicted with the aforementioned psychotic disorders. It is doubtful that she can ever be totally cured. Only in her relationship with Sheila did she show any tenderness and compassion. The love-hatred that she felt towards her father finally drove her over the brink. Doris is hopelessly insane now. Whether the mental disorders were inherent or manifested through the acute disappointment in her father, Clarence, we have as yet to find out. Luckily, the castration she had planned for her father never was accomplished, but, in a way, she has achieved a "victory." Clarence, traumatized into impotence, finally "cracked up" and is an inmate of the same institution that his daughter is confined in. This is a tragic case where criminal and victim are both suffering the tortures of the damned. Of course, the question that rises in our minds at this moment is: Who really is the criminal, and who really is the victim?
CHAPTER FIVE
A Tale of Two Fathers
"I hope you realize-if I'm not being too impertinent-that I am here, and telling you all of this under protest, and only as a favor to an old and dear friend, one whom I trust implicitly. She seems to think that all you have to do is wave Freud, Adler, and Jung at me and all will be well. I, for one, can't accept that, and if I did, I sure as hell wouldn't be here. You see, there is nothing that I want changed. I'm perfectly happy as I am, and if I am living in the blackest of mortal sins, why-let them make the most of it, and to hell with them.
"I'm more than just content, I'm fairly ecstatic, and if there is any better way to live, I don't want to even know about it. As I said, I am very happy. I wouldn't change my life for anyone or anything else. And believe me, you'll be the last one to convince me any differently. Heaven can wait, because I've got heaven right here. If after I die and go to hell (if there really is such a place) I, for one, will go there willingly, for, to paraphrase another old saying, 'I have spent my time in heaven, so who cares if I go to hell.'
"I'm sorry that I sound hostile. If it weren't for Campy's tears and pleadings, I could certainly think of a million other places I would prefer to be, other than here, babbling into this stupid microphone. But, since I am here, I might as well get it over with.
"I refuse to start with my formative years, because I can remember no instances of being attacked by a 'Raggedy Andy' doll running rapaciously rampant, or being fingered suggestively by a leering old man who desired more than the dime I held in my hot little hand in order to purchase a lime popsicle.
"My mother died when I was ten, and the house was run more or less haphazardly by a succession of housekeepers until I grew up and took over. I think I have succeeded in running a cleaner, warmer, better adjusted home than you can find anywhere. I have kept my father happy and also kept him from succumbing to the faded lures of any bush-league adventuress that might want to marry him for want of home and 24-karat hearth. Oh no!
"Now, by no means has he been unhappy. Believe me when I say that my dear father had been cheered considerably in the companionship department, and therefore couldn't possibly have any complaints about anything. Especially about being neglected.
"Let me explain how the whole delightful thing got started. It started, not once upon a time, but once upon an old friendship, and upon a few rounds of hot-buttered rum served before a cheerful fire on a cold, snowy, winter's night.
"Nat-I'll call him that, Nat, just for propriety's sake-was paying us one of his extended visits. Of course, as usual, he brought along his only daughter, whom I shall call Jean for these purposes. They're just about the nicest people in the world. I am not exaggerating when I use the tired cliche, "beautiful people,' for they truly are. Nat and my father have a lot in common, just as Jean and I have. Nat lost his wife only a year after my mother passed on, and like Father, he never remarried. He and Father went to college together, competed in the same sports and activities.
"Nat is a handsome man, strong, and attractively gray. His daughter Jean is my opposite in coloring, but almost the same in stature. She is an ash blonde and has the palest blue eyes imaginable. Real cornflower eyes, with long, silken lashes, Jean is almost a year younger than I am, and she is about an inch shorter. Her weight is the same as mine, give or take a few ounces. The reason I am bothering to tell you all these physical descriptions is that they are very important to the story I am telling you.
"My own father is like me in looks, although much taller and wider, and extremely masculine, whereas, as you can see, I am totally feminine. His hair is just now becoming the 'salt-and-pepper' that women find so attractive. He swims, plays golf, rides horseback as well as indulges in gym workouts in order to keep in top-notch shape. Nat is similar also, and for the same reasons.
"When Nat comes to visit us, we all drink a bit. We sing and dance and tell all the latest dirty jokes (within good taste), and generally enjoy our company to the fullest. This particular visit started out no different than a dozen others, but its culmination was quite the opposite. One particular night, Father and Nat drank a little more than usual. I suppose Jean and I were guilty of that, too.
"The men were playing the 'nostalgia game' and it got too deep a grip on them. They were sorrowing, and telling each other how lonely it was living in a household without a woman. Not that their homes were not run well, they said, casting sidelong glances at us, but, daughters did not take the place of wives.
"Jean protested, and, of course, so did I. After all, we both really exerted ourselves to meet every need. The men apologized, and another round of rum was served. The rum was having an effect on all of us, but Jean and I felt something else was moving within us. Later on Jean confessed to me that what was bothering her was exactly what was bothering me. We both dreaded the thought of a strange woman coming into our fathers' lives and usurping our rightful positions in the household.
"We tried to joke our fathers out of their pensive mood, and put wild music on the stereo player, but nothing seemed to work very well. I went over and sat on Father's lap. I was-let me see-eighteen years old then, and not much has changed for me physically since then. So, I guess, I was quite a weight on poor Daddy, but he certainly didn't seem to mind very much. I kept his glass filled and told him a story a shade bluer than I had ever told in his presence before. He shot me a quick glance and then looked into his glass and said something inane to Nat, who was laughing like hell.
"Nat said, 'Our little girls aren't little girls anymore, chum. They are full-grown young women, inside and out. We're just lucky some young punk with a Rolls hasn't stolen both of them away from us. Did it ever occur to you, ol' buddy, what a waste it's going to be, letting some ungrateful kid grab all that? I mean,' his voice was thick and slurring, 'I mean, take a good look at that ravishing beauty you have perched on your lap. She's well stacked, ol' buddy, and she's got the kind of look in her eye that pulls me in behind her when she walks. And, speaking of a walk, Helen has movements going for her that you seldom see anywhere anymore.'
"Father kind of sat up, and I felt him move under me. He had one eye half closed, squinting almost drunkenly over at Jean, who was perched on the arm of her father's chair. 'Speak for yourself, Nat. I mean, look at your Jean. Her legs alone are enough to make me wish I were twenty, no-ten, no, dammit-five years younger. And she's not missing anything upstairs, either.'
"There was a sudden quiet, a funny kind of odd embarrassment, as if all of us suspected that things had gone a bit too far. I broke the silence. 'Another drink for anyone? And let's continue the compliments; I love them.'
" 'Yeah,' Jean chirped in, and I could have kissed her, 'tell me some more about how sexy I am, Larry.' At this remark, Nat only lifted an eyebrow, and when I brought him a refill, I gave Jean a long and searching look that she understood. Then I tugged Nat up out of his comfortable chair and made him dance with me. Across the room, Jean was dancing with my father, and we were using their kind of music, the slow, sensuous melodies that make you want to dance, oh, so close together, holding each other very tightly. Rock stuff may be great for turning on grass with,' but give me music that puts a man's body up tight against mine.
"I was stimulated by Nat, and snuggled up close to him. When we danced by a table lamp, I reached out and flicked it off. I put my head into the hollow of his shoulder and let my breath flutter warmly against his neck. I had made up my mind to seduce him, and the rum was burning wickedly inside me, urging me on. I moved my leg between his legs as we danced and allowed my fingers to play with the hair on the back of his neck as I shoved my breasts up tight against him. From his breathing, I could tell that he knew what was going on-and was liking it.
"We danced by where Father and Jean were rocking back and forth. They really weren't dancing, they were just moving in place. I smiled at her, nodding approval, and received the same acknowledgement in return.
"I had steered Nat to the foot of the stairs by the time the record had changed. He hesitated, glancing back at his daughter and his oldest friend, locked in each other's arms and forgetting to dance. I put my lips up to his ear. 'Why not, Nat? As you've said, we're all grown-up now, inside and out. I'd very much like you to take me to bed-right now, please, in the guest room.'
"His breath caught in his throat. The alcohol racing through his blood helped us along, blocking any inhibitions he may have had about his one and only daughter being about to be laid by my father. It also pushed him up the stairs with me.
"Of course, it wasn't only the alcohol. I was on fire, myself, and my excitement was certainly shared by Nat. I was trembling so hard by the time I reached the guest room that I had trouble opening the door. Before entering, I took one last look down the stairs. As I glanced, I saw the very last lamp go out in the living room below. I shook all over, trying to imagine what my handsome father was doing to the immaculate and divinely blonde Jean. I saw in my mind's eye, my father sitting down on the couch with her, saw him holding her close and kissing her, saw his hand coming up to caress her breast, saw her skirt sliding up above her knee until the frilly, lacy bottoms of her panties showed against the golden flesh. 'Nat,' I said, whirling to him, 'oh, Nat.'
"He was very gentle. He placed me upon the bed and neither of us felt awkward about getting undressed; once we were naked, however, I wanted the light out. There was just a slight touch of lasciviousness about it, a sneaky lust that made it all the more tantalizing. He came to me in the dark, just as my father was coming to the golden girl in the dark below. I felt the smooth warmth of his body against my leg, so I lifted it so he could be even closer to me. His lips found mine, and I parted them for him, opened them to the gusty breathing and the probing tongue that slipped into my mouth and threatened to fill it with all its swollen maleness. He started to sweat, and the musky smell pouring from his body, blending with the expensive cologne, made the blood race through my veins even faster. My groin was on fire, and only one thing could put that fire out.
"His hands were now at my tender aching breasts. They were gentle as they caressed my throbbing nipples, but no less tender than his seeking mouth as he took my rounded flesh into that cavity. His teeth, ever so lightly, scraped my nipples as he teasingly nibbled at them. Nat was a master at the art of making love. He took time, paced himself beautifully, and performed on me like Paganini performed on a violin. A genius at instrumentality. He petted and caressed me, his mouth paying homage to my breasts, my shoulders, my neck, and the underpaid of my arms. His hands moved deftly, with the sureness of long and successful experience. He made me feel positively adored. By now I was giving way at practically every pore.
"I put down my own hand and found his penis. The size, the obvious power of it, surprised me. I was anything but a virgin, but my experience had been confined to just two boys at school, and they couldn't compete with what Nat had, even if you'd've put them both together. I began stroking him and fondling him, and when the sweeping urge was about to tear me apart, I guided him into me and slipped my cupped hand around his testicles. It was a slow and sweet wonder. His beautiful penis plunged into me, in what seemed to be slow motion, and I felt the lips and walls of my vagina respond with the same slow sensuous movement. I felt like we were making love underwater, with those slow, graceful movements of an underwater ballet. The head of his penis penetrated my innermost being, where no penis, especially the high-school variety, had ever penetrated before. I writhed, I groveled, I squirmed in the enjoyment of his maleness.
"Suddenly, like a sledgehammer-no, an air-hammer-he surged into me. I felt the swelling movement of head and shaft. I could imagine the millions and millions of microscopic spermatozoa, united like a massive army, invading me with just one cause, one battle to win-the conquering of my passion-filled valley of love.
"He was forcing himself deeper and deeper into my welcoming vagina. I felt the tip of his penis battering away at the entrance of my womb. I was dizzy with delight and rapture. His penis was working like a trip-hammer. I felt my whole body reach out to him. I no longer had arms, legs, torso, neck, head-I was one vast vagina, pleading to be filled.
"I bit his lips, I ground my teeth against his and ran my tongue deep into his mouth. I crushed my breasts against his heavy, hairy chest and wiggled, shook, quivered, lifted. 'Go,' I hissed at him, 'go! Dig me, drive me, bash me, smash me! Take me apart, split me wide open, bury it deep, deep, deeper! Deeper, oh! deeper ... puh-leeze!' And he did. 'Come, darling, come, come, come, now, now, now! ! ! ' And he did. The hot sperm burst forth from his burning penis. He came three times at once, like a machine gun. It hammered into me. I cried, I clawed, I screamed with ecstasy. He pushed even harder, like he had another load ready to surge into me. I almost passed out with the delight of my great and rending orgasm. Suddenly the whole world hushed. Nat and I were alone, spinning in space, and then, like a falling leaf, we slowly began our descent back to earth and reality. "That was lovely,' I said.
" 'Darling,' Nat whispered huskily into my ear. 'Darling Helen. I have wanted you for years, and now I have you. I want to love every inch of you, my darling, darling Helen. I want to make you scream with joy and cry with joy and laugh with joy. I want to love your legs, your belly, your dimpled butt. I want to love every part of you. I want to do everything that can be done to you.'
" 'Do it,' I said, 'and show me what you would wish me to do to you in return. I want to make you happy and completely satisfied. I want to make you just as happy as my father is hopefully making your Jean feel right now.' He stiffened for a minute. 'Don't be silly,' I said. 'Wouldn't you prefer your good friend to make love to her, than some goofy kid who didn't know what it is all about? After all,' I added reassuringly, 'your daughter Jean is a beautiful, sexy, delightful woman. My father is a decent, handsome, trustworthy man. Just think how wonderfully lucky she is.'
" 'You're right,' he said. 'And I hope that he is getting the same glorious thrills from my daughter that I'm getting from his.'
" T am sure that he is,' I replied. 'Isn't this the most perfect of arrangements, Nat? Isn't this just wonderful for all of us? We can share, we can make love, and it is all the more lovely because we are doing it for each other, because we are good, loyal, and old, old friends. Jean is meeting my father's needs, just as you are meeting mine. Isn't it just heavenly?'
" 'Yes,' he said, and we talked while our bodies remained blended. We discoursed on sex and its various manifestations. Nat confessed to me that he had always had an 'unfatherly' attachment towards his daughter. I told him that he wasn't a rarity, that I, too, had been drawn sexually to my own father, and that for a long time I was ashamed of myself for thinking such things, but, with my maturity, I found out that such urgings are sometimes quite normal, though society in general frowns on such practices.
"We kissed each other again, and both of us felt the rumbling of another urging, but it was too soon, so we amused ourselves in other ways. After a while we copulated again, and it was as magical as the first time, and, in some ways, even sweeter, because we knew each other so much better the second time around. Then, for a long while, we slept peacefully, gently locked in each other's arms.
"The morning was a bit awkward. Father and Jean had gone into his room for the night, and she had come downstairs first. We stared at each other a trifle antagonistically, a shade jealously. Then I said, 'Hi-let's get a good breakfast for the old bears. I think they need it-at least, to regain their strength.'
"Jean laughed. 'Yes, I guess they probably will. Come on, dear, we'll fix it together.'
"Over breakfast, we began to exchange confidences, as we'd always done in the past, and I felt even closer to Jean than I ever had before. She was something more than a friend, a sister, a wife, a mother, or even a lover. I told her so. The men were late in coming down, so we sipped our coffee and whispered of our great fortune, of our wonderful lovers.
" 'Larry is tremendous,' she said. 'He's so much more of a man than-well, than the boys I've slept with before. I mean, he gets down into me and loves me so hard and so long-I wish it could last forever.'
"I nodded. "That's how I feel about Nat, your father. He's so big, you know, but yet-he's so very gentle, and experienced. Tell me, Jean-'
" 'Yes, Helen-anything.'
" 'Is my father-is he big, or--? '
" 'Long,' she said. 'Not so big, it seems, but very firm. And he can reach in so deeply into-'
" 'Hey!' I said. 'Your father told me he's always been secretly drawn to you. And I have always secretly wanted to-'
" 'Let's,' she murmured, a step ahead of me. "Tonight, after we-after I get through balling Larry, I'll slip out of bed and go into the bath.'
" 'I'll meet you in the bathroom,' I said.
" 'Do you keep the light out?'
" 'Yes,' I answered. 'It'll be perfect this way. If they feel strange about fucking their own daughters, they can pretend they didn't know.' I never was more excited in my whole life.
"Our fathers came downstairs, freshly shaved and showered, looking great, and also trying very hard to pretend that nothing so unusual had happened the night before. After a few minutes, the tension left them and they relaxed. In fact, they seemed like men twenty years younger-in love and on their honeymoon. In fact, Jean and I felt jut like a couple of brand-new brides.
"Later that morning we went swimming in the lake. As we changed, we eyed one another's bodies covertly. My father stared long at Jean's smooth golden legs, at the dimple of her stomach, and the high, full roundness of her breasts. But he also looked me over from time to time, and the expression on his face was that of a man who was seeing me nude for the first time. I saw a large bulge in Daddy's trunks, and knew that one of us had given him a big erection.
"We ate lunch in the pavilion, then drove into town for an afternoon at the cinema. We tried to hurry through the day and make it pass faster. After a delicious dinner of charcoal-broiled steaks and vintage champagne, we yawned and dispersed-to sleep, we all said. But we were all eager for a repeat of the sensuous delights that we had all experienced the preceding night. For me, there was a magical dessert waiting between the sheets, upstairs.
"Once in bed, I practically hurtled myself at Nat. I used my aching body to envelop him. My clitoris, my labia, my vulva. All my inner parts ached for the feel of Nat's penis, throbbing once again inside me. He was lying on his back, so I climbed on top of him and lowered myself down over the length of head and shaft of that marvelous piece of flesh.
"I rode up and down, up and down until the waves of my onrushing orgasm almost knocked me senseless. He shot his load into me, and, oh, how absolutely wonderful it felt. I jiggled up and down until the last bit of joy juice had shot forth into me. Nat's penis continued to stay hard for quite some time afterwards, and I thoroughly enjoyed every single moment of my sexual impalement. I could have ridden that staff all day and night.
"But I wasn't finished for the night. The best was yet to come. I lay there, next to Nat for what seemed like hours. I heard a noise in the bathroom, got up, without disturbing Nat, and went in. Jean was in there, waiting for me. She was as nude as I was. 'Good luck,' she said, and like two ships passing in the night we went to our respective fathers' beds.
"I eased into my own father's room, moving slowly in the blackness that surrounded me. Lowering myself gently into bed, I rolled close to him and felt the electric shock of my own father's unfamiliar body. His flesh seemed so strange and new. He stirred, and I became rigid. He reached out, touched my breast, and murmured, 'Darling!'
"Ah! I said to my innermost self. Ah! I said to the whirlpool of passion gathering within me. I silently shouted, as the whirlpool gathered and hurled me into the abyss of sheer erotic fantasy. I slid underneath him and helped him guide his penis into me. His penis, my point of origin. I felt magnificent. My eager vagina sucked him into me with greedy gulps. My womb ached for the pounding that I knew would soon come. I rioted under him as the paternal sperm forced its way into my aching crevice.
like waves crashing against the shore, its hot sticky countenance coated the walls of my vagina and hurled itself against the aching tip of my womb. I almost fainted with pure joy.
"I stayed with him for hours, doing things to him, using every part of my body, my legs, haunches, womb, and mouth. I reveled in becoming his mistress and lover and whore and wife and, most of all, his daughter.
"But, during all this, I never said a word out loud. I answered his endearments with my lips or my fingers or a nod of my head. I uttered no sweet names, or even a sigh, for fear of giving away my identity too flagrantly and embarrassing him. He wanted to suck my breasts, so I turned my head away and drew him to me. He nursed at me like a newborn child, and I was happy.
"It was getting close to daylight, so I felt I must leave him, much as I hated to. Jean and I passed silently in the bathroom, smiling that smile that only mutual success can convey. Success is so beautiful. If Jean was as happy as I was, then the two happiest girls in the world are the two greatest friends.
"Breakfast that morning between us was a picnic of shared secrets. Jean was just as delighted with her father's sexual prowess as I was with mine. I asked her if Nat suspected. She said she thought so, but that he would never let on. I told her that my father would play it just as cool. I also told her that she was right about him not being so big, but we also agreed that for what he lacked in quantity, he more than made up for in quality.
"It was an idyllic summer we spent. Originally, Jean and Nat had only planned to stay for a couple of days, but with the beautiful turn of events we four stayed together for the whole season. Before we knew it, we were getting ready to go back to school. We looked forward to the weekends, with renewed anticipation of what a new kind of life was awaiting us in the wings."
It is rare to run into two distinct personality types, such as Helen and Jean, with the same problem, i.e., a sexual desire of an incestuous nature. Both being daughters of wifeless men, they felt, during their formative years that they had to "replace" their absent mothers. In pursuing this bent, they became jealous and possessive. Their fathers were virile men, attractive and successful. In the girls' sexual experience, they found the fumbling of their schoolboy conquests disappointing. "They didn't match up to what we thought our fathers would be."
The constant threat of stepmothers caused each of them to strive to be a "wife-lover" to her lonely parent. Both girls had this "wish fulfillment" on their minds the night that we have just read about. What started out to be a night of "daughter-swapping," which is not any more moral-shocking to today's sexual libertarian, turned into incest by the form of pure circumstance. Two lonely, slightly drunk men, and two voluptuous and very willing daughters were thrown together in a festive and pleasant atmosphere of a secluded country estate. Whether or not the two fathers were aware of the midnight switch of their sex partners is a moot question. If they were, they didn't let on for quite awhile.
The uniqueness of this particular case is that it combines the elements of "wife-swapping" and father-daughter incest. In this, the writer has been unable to come up with a similar precedent in any previous case history ever studied. The analyst or social worker who will without a doubt be involved with one or the other of the girls, or perhaps both, in the future, should be able to produce a paper that will interest any reader of the Journal of American Psychiatry.
Our subject, Helen, now draws her narrative to a close.
"I was delirious with happiness. I now had two lovers: Nat and my own father. What girl could ask for more? Jean is happy, too. We enjoy sitting up nights and talking about our sex lives. She enjoys Larry so much. I tingle inside as she goes to great lengths in describing how he goes down on her and dips his strong, passionate tongue into her steaming vagina. Jean squirmed with delight when I told her how I introduced Nat to anal sex. She said that if her father ever suggested it to her, she would love it. In fact, she plans to ask my father if he would like to try it.
"I think our fathers know that we are switching beds during the night. They pretend they don't know what is going on, but that, of course, makes the whole thing a lot more fun. I think one night Jean and I will suggest that the four of us should pile into one bed and have a ball. I think having Nat's penis up my rectum, while Daddy is pumping my vagina full of sperm would be very satisfying.
"I don't think what we are doing is wrong at all. We all love each other very, very much. I am not the least bit jealous of Jean balling with my father, and she is delighted that I am Nat's sex-partner. Sex isn't our whole life. Jean and I are still in school and our fathers have their respective careers. Our whole life-style is exciting, adventurous, and full. What more could anyone ask? I know most of society condemns what is called incest, but I feel no guilt about our 'togetherness.' "
CONCLUSION
In the preceding five chapters we have attempted to present varied case histories of father and daughter sexual relationships. All were motivated by different causes and circumstances. In these case histories, the author has tried to show that the happy and satisfactory outcome of an incestuous problem depends on the willingness of those involved to conquer their desires and to "trod the straight and narrow." For those who felt different and unrepentant, the future course, in most cases, proved tragic. Some of these people are sexually off the track and have no desire whatsoever to return to the degree of "normalcy" defined by medical science or society. These people will need extensive psychiatric care for quite some time to come. Either way, the proper motivation
"to straighten out" is mandatory. Both the mentally healthy and the neurotic are driven by the need to find a reason for living and a happy and peaceful way of doing it.
Sex plays an important role in every person's life. How they confront sex is a mirror image of how they confront life itself. Primitive urges often drive a parent onto the incest trail. In a normal person, the awareness of "Mother" or "Fatherhood" is strong enough to keep him or her from straying from the imaginary to the overt act of committing incest. Social and religious pressures are a great tool of the conscience. The other aspect of incest is, of course, the child's desire for the parent. The child may think that sexual adventures with one or the other parent will create a closer bond of love and acceptance. The alert parent will see these abstract urgings in their young and will take action in time to prevent an actual confrontation. Unfortunately, there are a few parents who will take advantage of such a situation. Parents who look to their children as normal extensions of their sex output are very disturbed people, indeed, and will require the services of a psychiatrist or, ultimately, law-enforcement officials.
The sexual revolution of the '60s and '70s will bring forth all types of sexual practices into the open. Themes that have been absolute taboos since Victorian times are now pretty much accepted. Though still often considered rather bizarre, they are not necessarily taken to be indecent, perverted, or criminal. Stigma is still attached to bestiality, incest, and child-molestation-as it should be-for these activities have an adverse effect on all stages of civilized society due to the adverse effect on the sometime innocent victim.
Incest is more common in rural communities than in urban. In some communities incest is a natural way of life for many families. In the cities, where education and communication is better, acts of incest are rarer and, in most cases, are committed by people with psychological disorders.
Open discussion, education, and therapy can bring the urban offender to an arrest of this aberration. In rural areas, where family life is much more close-knit, the practice of incest may go on unobserved or unreported.
Incest, of all the sexual aberrations, is the most difficult to handle because of the secrecy it is usually surrounded with. Only in cases of pregnancy are the true facts usually uncovered.
Man is a complex creature, and is the only mammal that will knowingly commit wrong. Mark Twain once observed that "God created the monkey because He was so disappointed in Man." Man is an imperfect animal, yet the only animal gifted with the freedom of choice on how he wishes to live his life. Only through education and idealism can man remove these imperfections. It will take an informed and concerned society to accomplish this. Medical science, teachers, and preachers can do just so much. Man will have to do the rest-by lifting himself by his own moral bootstraps.
BIBLIOGRAPHY
Ellis, Havelock. Psychology of Sex: A Manual for Students. New York: Emerson Books, 1964.
Fromm, Erich. The Nature of Man. New York:
Macmillan & Co., 1968. Freud, Sigmund. Three Essays on the Theory of
Sexuality. Newall, Calif.: Hogarth Press, 1953.
Davis, Maxine. Sex and the Adolescent. New York: Dial Press, 1958.
