AN UNSTATED UNDERSTANDING by Joe Whatever "Even with colonial rulers as wise and just as the British, it is natural that these little rebellions should occur every now and then," the emir said. "I am happy that we could negotiate the return of the city to British control without any further disorder." "Indeed," the colonel replied, as he pushed the papers across the desk to the emir. "I think these...unstated understandings between the army and the locals are the core of the Empire." He lit a black cigar. "Naturally I will expect all of the leaders of the rebellion to be turned over, and the British prisoners released," he continued. "My troops will assume control of the city immediately." "As you wish," the emir replied as he signed the papers. "A pity though -- we had a most amusing spectacle planned for lunch." "A spectacle?" "Well, naturally a great deal of the rebel resentment is directed toward your females, since they are so much more outspoken then our women," the emir explained. "And there is one young woman in particular, a Miss Davis, who has offended nearly everyone in the city. And yet, sadly, since her father is a member of your Parliament, she is exempt from justice." "I'm familiar with Miss Davis," the colonel said, tightly. "She threw a drink in my face at the Embassy party last month." "She is fortunate that you are here now. The self-styled 'Revolutionary Tribunal' had sentenced her to a rather shameful and ignominious punishment," the emir said, with a sly smile. "How shameful? And how ignominious?" the colonel asked, his interest clearly piqued. "She was to be taken to the market place and stripped naked for 30 strokes of the strap...and then made to give oral pleasure to ten rebel soldiers selected at random, through a lottery. A rather bitter drink for such a proud young lady," he added with a laugh. "Seeing a haughty little bitch like Miss Davis brought to heel would have had an wonderful calming effect on local resentments." He sighed. "But it is out of the question now," he said, wistfully. "Immediately after you sign the arrangement, Miss Davis will be freed, and your troops will reclaim the city." The colonel's pen hovered over the paper as he considered the matter. After a long and thoughtful pause, he put the pen down. "I'm afraid that I left my ceremonial pen in my other uniform," he said. "Perhaps we should sign the treaty after lunch." "Indeed," the emir said. "We can eat at the marketplace. I have a nicely discreet vantage point from which we can enjoy the pre-luncheon entertainment unobserved." Edited by C. Lakewood