WHICH WITCH? by Joe Doe LADY EMILY IS FASCINATED BY TALES OF HOW THE WITCHFINDER STRIPS YOUNG NOBLEWOMEN TO SEARCH FOR THE FABLED "WITCHES MARK." SHE BOLDLY WRITES HIM A LETTER ASKING FOR THE JUICY DETAILS. "I wanted to thank you for taking the time to answer my letter, kind sir," the beautiful young noblewoman said. "I know the Witchfinder General is a busy man, and I never expected him to take the time to visit my estate in person." The beautiful Lady Emily waved her maid forward and signaled her to begin serving tea. Although scarcely twenty when her father died and left her the estate, Lady Emily was an accomplished hostess, and was very much at home in her elegant parlor. In a time when most women were scarcely the equals of men, she had proven herself even more unmerciful in business than her father. The whole town hated her, but her power was unchallenged. Lady Emily was a woman of science, not superstition, and she viewed a visit from the Witchfinder as a harmless diversion. She knew the Witchfinder relished stripping young noblewomen naked and subjecting them to all manner of indignities. Although she would never admit it, she secretly found the stories thrilling. And, of course. there was always the chance that the corrupt Witchfinder would be willing to subject one of her many rivals to a shameful and humiliating probe! The Witchfinder relaxed in the large chair and sipped his tea. "It is not a problem, Lady Emily," he replied evenly. "It is unusual to discover a refined young lady such as yourself so interested in the specific techniques of my profession. Most young ladies find my practices rather disquieting, and. indeed. most shudder at the mention of my name. I've never met a woman bold enough to write me a letter such as the one you sent. I was surprised at so many...detailed questions about what I do." "Still, I appreciate your coming out of your way to see me, sir," Lady Emily said, stirring the sugar into her tea. "It was not at all inconvenient visiting your estate," he replied, suavely. "Indeed, I have some pressing business in this area." "Business, sir?" she said, startled. "What sort of business?" "We will return to that subject later, begging your ladyship's pardon," the Witchfinder replied. "Right now I would like to respond to your letter." He took the document out of his jacket pocket and reviewed it. "You seemed particularly interested in the methods I use to search for a 'Witch's Mark.'" The Witchfinder paused and sipped his tea. He enjoyed lecturing about his strip searches, particularly with a woman as fetching as Lady Emily. "As you know, the Witch's Mark is often a small freckle or blemish on a witch's body. Sometimes it is even invisible. All witches have one; it is where the Devil laid his finger upon her to seal their pact. It is therefore necessary to catalog and examine all marks on the body of any suspected witch, and indeed, to study every inch of her exposed flesh with the utmost care." "Exposed flesh? You mean the hands and face?" Lady Emily asked, feigning innocence. "I'm afraid the examination is much more thorough than that, my lady. Since you must examine all of the skin, you must expose all of the woman's flesh, for a COMPLETE review." He sighed and sipped his tea. "Regrettably, this requires the victim -- I mean the accused -- to remove her clothing...." He smiled and looked directly at Lady Emily. "ALL of her clothing." "That must be dreadfully humiliating!" "Well, for a common girl like your maid here, it would be humiliating enough. But I tend to specialize in witchcraft involving pretty young noblewoman such as yourself. For a lady of breeding to be stripped naked like a common harlot, especially in the presence of a large crowd of interested males, is shameful beyond words. A visit from me is the most mortifying experience a young aristocratic lady can have. "Of course, there are other differences between noblewomen and serving wenches," the Witchfinder went on. "Suppose I were to accuse your maid here. She is very beautiful, in a common sort of way, but she has few enemies and is not well known in the area. I could probably conduct the examination in the town hall, and be assured that there was room enough for all who wished to attend." Lady Emily smiled at her blushing maid, who was shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot. Stripping her maid stark naked in the town hall had never occurred to Lady Emily. (But it was a delightful thought.) "On the other hand, if I were to examine a well-bred young woman such as yourself, the crowd would be too large for any building," he averred. "Indeed, I've already talked to the Sheriff, and he has agreed that, if a beautiful young noblewoman such as yourself were accused, I would conduct my examination in the town square, where one and all could watch the proceedings." Lady Emily's maid interrupted. "Would you really strip Lady Emily absolutely naked?" the maid asked eagerly. "Absolutely BUTT-naked?" Emily shot her maid an angry glance. How dare she interject herself into the conversation! But the maid ignored her lady's glare, obviously delighted that the subject of the hypothetical strip search was now Lady Emily, and that the venue had shifted to the village square. The Witchfinder sighed, as if it were the most regrettable duty imaginable. "Unfortunately, her ladyship would be stripped as naked as the day she was born." "Naked as a newborn!" the maid chuckled softly, obviously relishing the idea. "And in the town square! In front of EVERYONE!" She furrowed her brow in mock sympathy and looked at her mistress with an expression of false pity. "That would be simply DREADFUL, my lady!" the maid said, feigning sympathy. Then she smiled at her mistress...and winked! Lady Emily glared at her serving girl with anger. "You are EXCUSED, girl," she said, harshly. The maid, ignoring Lady Emily, turned to question the Witchfinder. "So do you think her ladyship would draw a large crowd, gentle sir?" the maid asked, her eyes bright with anticipation. She looked Lady Emily up and down, appraisingly. "I've attended her ladyship in the bath, and she is ripe and curvy, especially stark naked. I expect that she would draw an enormous crowd and that there would be quite a few pleased to see her get hers," "You forget your place, girl," Lady Emily hissed. "I order you to leave at once!" The Witchfinder chuckled along with the maid, despite Lady Emily's outburst. "When a particularly beautiful young noblewoman is accused, I'm afraid it brings out the worst in people," he noted, sadly. "All of the most shrewish women and lustful men are sure to get front row seats. Base types revel in the young woman's humiliation and call out the most dreadful assessments of her naked anatomy. People of the lower social classes love to see a beautiful member of upper classes debased and humiliated, and their eagerness lends a regrettably festive mood to the examination." "The woman is forced to expose herself totally to the crowd, but of course special attention is paid to the breasts and buttocks, as well as the area between the legs. It is in these most private regions that Satan likes to lurk, and the crowd is usually all too eager to make sure that the wretched woman is displayed fully and well." The Witchfinder paused and sipped his tea, while Lady Emily blushed beet red. She was also starting to feel a certain dampness between her legs.... He then continued his lecture. "Of course, the young woman finds her so-called 'friends' to be of no help whatsoever. Spurned suitors are delighted to finally be able to see for free what they could not buy through marriage. And her rivals enjoy her humiliation and usually make arrangements to make sure the procedure is as degrading as possible." He turned from the maid and spoke again to Lady Emily. "For example, I believe you know Lady Horner?" Lady Emily stiffened at the mention of her hated neighbor's name. Lady Emily had been involved in numerous land disputes with Lady Horner...and romantic disputes, besides. Emily was much more wealthy and beautiful than Lady Horner and had always defeated her rival both in the courtroom and in affairs of the heart. She had even given her rival a nickname, "Lady Horny," which had stuck, much to Emily's delight and Lady Horner's rage. The Witchfinder continued his lecture. "Lady Horner has arranged for a large examination table with straps to be placed on the huge block in the public square. The table is quite flexible, and it can be adjusted so that any portion of the witch's anatomy is visible to the crowd." "Lady Horner was also kind enough to pay a special honorarium fee, in return for which I agreed to leave the witch naked in the town stocks for a week, while I consider the evidence against her. The accused will be bent at the waist, with her bare bottom in the air and her feet spread shamefully apart. I did explain that, in this position, the witch would be helpless to evade indecent fingers and other assaults by the town ruffians, but Lady Horner felt it was a risk that she was willing to take in order to see justice done." "I hear it's not a sin to bugger a woman, if the woman is a witch!" the maid said, her voice trembling with excitement. "Yes, it is true that anal and oral pleasures are encouraged, since the purpose is the punishment and humiliation of the witch. Be sure to remind me to tell the crowd, girl, in case I forget." The maid grinned and nodded. Lady Emily had no doubt that the shameful announcement would be remembered. Lady Emily swallowed. She had fantasies about the Witchfinder, but the talk of Lady Horner and a week in the stocks made her uncomfortable. She was usually in charge in all situations, but now she suddenly felt very small and alone. She shifted in her seat, nervously stirring her tea. There was something about the way the Witchfinder's commanding manner and the way he looked at her.... It was almost as if he were stripping her with his eyes. And the look her usually humble maid was giving her was totally unnerving. "Which witch...I mean...which young woman of this village...stands accused?" Lady Emily asked, a slight tremor in her voice. The Witchfinder ignored her query and continued. "Lady Horner is a determined woman, and I am glad she is not MY enemy. She even insisted that I shave the accused witch's...nether regions...so that the public exam may be more thorough. Of course, I doubt that Lady Horner will regret the added humiliation of having her hated rival appear with her privates bare and smooth!" Lady Emily felt her hands began to tremble, and she almost spilled her tea. She looked over at her maid, who was standing there and smiling down at her. Once again, she dismissed the girl curtly, but the Witchfinder cut her off. "I'd like your maid to stay, Lady Emily. Your serving girl has been very helpful to me, as have Lady Horner and several other men and woman in the community. For example, your maid told me that you punished her bare bottom with a thick leather strap, and she suggested that the strap might be useful when we tie the accused witch down over the punishment block in the square and begin our interrogation." He paused and smiled at Lady Emily. "Would you mind if we borrowed the razor strap?" he asked. "I...suppose...not," Lady Emily said with hesitation. "But I'm sure the pain and shame of a bare bottom strapping, particularly a strapping in the town square, would hardly be appropriate if the woman you were thinking of were of noble birth," she said, hopefully. From behind her, Lady Emily heard her maid's voice. "A fresh dose of strap oil on her bare, sassy bottom cheeks is just the thing to loosen a fine lady's tongue. And I've been oiling and polishing the strap all week, so that it will hug every curve and burn like the very devil on her ladyship's fine, pampered arse!" "Loosen the tongue is an appropriate choice of words, in this case," the Witchfinder explained. "After the punishment, but before the week in the stocks, I usually meet with the witch alone in her cell. She kneels before me, and we conduct what I like to call the "oral examination." I usually require the accused witch to prove her submission through an act of oral debasement, which is quite unlady-like." He sighed and shook his head. "It is regrettably necessary that she provide me with oral pleasure, to prove her absolute submission to my authority. She must swallow her pride, and whatever other nectar I choose to give her. To be sure, I take no pleasure in this. It is simply my duty." He continued. "In addition, with the woman I have in mind, several of the town officials have also asked to participate in oral examinations, and there are by my count at least twenty men she will need to service in this disgraceful way. But what better way for a proud young woman to show submission to the authority of the men of the village? "Lady Horner's husband is on the list," he added. "I believe he courted you, did he not?" Lady Emily grimaced. The thought of kneeling in front of her rival's husband was not a pleasant one. Lord Horner had indeed courted Lady Emily desperately, and she had deliberately humiliated him. She finally threw him away and gave him to her rival like an old used-up bone that she was tired of chewing on. Of course, Lady Horner now had a man to stand behind, and Lady Emily knew that, in the legal system, that sometimes made all the difference. "Your maid suggested that, given the accused witch's notoriety, we arrange a special cart for carrying her to the town square. It is an open cart, with an iron bar running over the top." The shackles will hang from the overhead cross beam, so that the witch will be transported through the streets dangling from the bar, with her arms over her head and her toes barely brushing the floor of the cart." "You left out the best part, sir," the maid interjected. "She'll be taken through the streets naked -- NAKED AS A JAYBIRD! And she'll be exposed, front and back, for everyone to see, with her hands over her head." The maid stretched her arms until her fingers nearly touched the ceiling and she was standing on her toes. "I bet her jugs and juicy arse jiggle and squirm deliciously as the cart goes over the cobblestones. She'll be buck naked, and swinging in the breeze. And of course she'll be shaved, so everyone will get to see her juicy slit and pretty pussy lips, too." Lady Emily swallowed hard, shuddering at the vulgar image conjured up by her maid. Such a terrible thing was impossible. Wasn't it? "It is indecent for my maid to devise such a fiendish humiliation for a lady of quality," Lady Emily said, trying to regain her composure. She glared at her maid. "I can assure you that, when the strap is returned, I will deal with her at once!" Her maid returned her stare, apparently unafraid, which unnerved her even more. Usually the mere mention of the strap made all of her servants tremble in terror. But now it was Lady Emily who was afraid of the strap. "What will happen to the witch, after her week in the stocks is up?" Lady Emily asked reluctantly. The Witchfinder replied as if the answer were boring. "When she is found guilty, as she certainly will be, she would normally be burned or hanged. In this case, however, Lady Horner has suggested that the accused witch be stripped of everything, and put to work on her estate as a common serving girl. The witch will be allowed to redeem herself, through hard labor at menial work." Lady Emily gasped. A common serving girl! On Lady Horner's estate! He continued. "Lady Horner would naturally take control of the witch's former servants, lands, and money, and would be granted the accused witch's hereditary title, as recompense for her trouble. Of course, if the witch is disrespectful or tried to run away, Lady Horner could turn her over to the local authorities for execution of the original sentence." He smiled coldly. "Lady Horner has been generous enough to offer the local magistrates and myself substantial payment in exchange for our assistance in securing clear title. "Unfortunately, as the lowliest servant on the estate, the witch will not only have to face the abuse of the mistress, but also the abuse of her former servants. In the case of a fine lady such as yourself, that wouldn't be a concern, since I'm sure you've always treated everyone in your employ with tenderness and compassion." Lady Emily glanced over at her maid, who was rubbing her bottom and smiling at her like the cat that had just swallowed the canary. As the senior maid, she was empowered to use the strap on the junior serving girls, and Lady Emily had no doubt that she would exercise her authority with vigor. Lady Emily signaled for more tea, but her hands were shaking too much for her to hold the cup and saucer, much to her maid's obvious amusement. "It is just as well," the Witchfinder said, taking the cup and saucer from her hands. "I think your serving girl should go now. It is almost time for us to leave." The maid, who had ignored her mistress's repeated orders to leave, immediately exited the room. "Where are we going?" Lady Emily asked. "To the town square, Lady Emily," the Witchfinder replied. "Your maid and serving staff were VERY helpful in my investigations, and so they will be accompanying us as well. I'm sure they wouldn't want to miss the festivities in the village." He stood up and began stroking Lady Emily's long beautiful hair. "All of your servants say that you're the most desirable woman in England, and I have to agree. Indeed, all of them say that your beauty is quite...what was the word they used?" He paused and took out his notebook, trying to find the exact word. "Ah yes!" he said, smiling as he found the right word. "'Bewitching.' Every single man and woman said that they found your looks quite 'bewitching,' almost as if your beauty was a result of magic." He smiled at Lady Emily knowingly. She began to panic. "I don't have any magical powers!" she said, desperately. "I don't want to go to the town square!" The Witchfinder took Lady Emily's wrist and led her to door. His grip was not cruel, but it was firm, and she followed as if in a daze. He whispered in her ear. "Surely you want me to answer all of your questions about how I search for the 'Witch's Mark,' don't you?" And with each question, he took her a step closer to the door. "Whether I will strip the bitch bare naked? "Whether I will make her bend and touch her toes? "Whether I will make her spread her legs? "Whether I will check her inside and out?" "Who gets to watch? "Who gets to touch? "What shameful things the crowd will yell, when I show them how excited the witch's wet, steamy pussy is? "Whether I probe her tight, brown bottom hole? "Whether I make her swallow every drop? The Witchfinder opened the front door. "You cannot miss my little show in the town square," he continued. "I am going to answer ALL of your ladyship's questions. There is quite a crowd gathered already, from what I understand. Good news travels fast." When Lady Emily walked out the front door, she found all of her servants assembled in front of the house, smiling at her. Apparently everyone was looking forward to the festival in the town square. In front of the house was the horrible cart, with cuffs dangling mockingly from the iron cross beam. Her maid was right. Any woman hanging from that beam would have no way of hiding her charms. Immediately behind the cart, seated in a beautiful open carriage, was Lady Horner and her simpering husband. In her hands, Lady Horner held the notorious, shiny razor strap. It had been polished lovingly, and to perfection, and it glistened evilly in the sun. Lady Horner said nothing, but the smile on her face and the gleeful look in her eyes spoke volumes. Lady Emily started to walk towards the carriage, but one of her stable boys blocked her way. "This is YOUR carriage, my lady," he said, with a sly grin, pointing to the humiliating cart with the ominously empty cuffs. TINK! TINK! TINK! Lady Emily turned and saw her maid clicking a straight razor against a small bowl filled with water. Lady Emily thought of asking to be shaved in the house, but the cruel look in her maid's eyes told her that the request would be refused. Slowly the proud young noblewoman untied her bodice's drawstring and began to loosen the top of her dress, trying to ignore the whispers and smiles from the crowd. She looked anxiously at the cuffs that were swaying gently in the breeze, just waiting for a pair of delicate wrists. There was no doubt about "which witch" they were waiting for. Edited by C. Lakewood