THE UNHAPPIEST ELF

                              by 

                           Joe Doe


STEPHANIE WITNESSES THE FATE OF A VERY UNHAPPY ELF AT THE MALL. 



"Wendy, could you get that toy off the floor?" Santa asked sweetly. 
"I don't want any of the boys or girls to trip and hurt themselves. 

"Why don't you get it yourself, tubby?" the cranky elf snapped.   

In a way, Stephanie actually felt sorry for the girl.  The mall was 
packed, and the line to see Santa was endless.  Santa's request had 
been reasonable; he hadn't picked up the toy himself because he had 
two screaming children on his lap.  But Stephanie could understand 
why the pretty young elf was at wit's end.    

Stephanie had always hated the Christmas jobs that she had when she 
was in college, and she was glad that she was going to be able to 
enjoy three glorious weeks off from her lucrative law practice. 

She didn't mind taking her nephew to the mall for his picture with 
Santa, however.  Since Stephanie's sister lived way out here, she 
had never had an opportunity to visit this mall before, and she was 
the kind of young woman who was always eager to try new things. 

In fact, however, she recognized the pretty elf with the bad temper 
from the newspaper.  That elf was a female law student who had 
launched an unsuccessful lawsuit to close the local "Hooters" last 
year on the grounds of "displaced harassment."  Her novel legal 
concept sought massive damages for the campus coeds as compensation 
for the "unsavory brain patterns" that Hooters formed in the campus 
males.     

Stephanie had read that the frivolous suit had cost the young woman 
her internship, and she suspected that the proud young feminist was 
now working at the mall to pay her tuition. 

Obviously the skimpy elf costume galled the strident feminist.  And 
Stephanie was not unsympathetic.  Even her crumby Christmas jobs 
hadn't required her to prance around in a red micro-mini with 
thigh-high green hose and garters. 

The elves' costumes were clearly designed as Christmas eye candy 
to entice the fathers to endure the endless queue to see Santa.  
It was an effective technique: Stephanie was the only adult female 
in the tortuous line. 

"My break should have been five minutes ago," the feminist elf 
snarled.  Santa scowled back, and Stephanie could tell that old 
St. Nick was quickly losing patience with his rebellious helper.   

As soon as he finished with the child on his lap, Santa dutifully 
called for a five-minute break.  The children and their parents 
groaned in misery as Santa made the announcement with a hearty 
"Ho-Ho-Ho."   

But his face changed as he turned and glared at his petulant 
helper.  To Stephanie's surprise, he grabbed the rebellious elf 
by her wrist and pulled her through the front door of the wooden 
stage set that was serving as Santa's house. 

The windows to Santa's house were far too high for any of the kids 
to see in.  But adults could see clearly, and Stephanie gasped as 
Santa sat down on his break chair and pulled the naughty elf over 
his knee.  The elf struggled, but Santa effortlessly pinned the 
20-something girl's arm behind her back and raised her short red 
skirt over her squirming hips. 

"What do you think you're doing?" the irate elf cried. 

"You've been a very naughty little girl," Santa said, sternly.  
"And, since I left my lumps of coal back at the North Pole, I'm 
going to give you a spanking instead." 

"I'll sue you for everything you're worth!" 

"Fine," he replied, tartly.  "I'm represented by the firm of 
Rudolph, Dasher, and Vixen, and I'll tell them to be expecting 
your call."  

The girl kicked her booted feet as he inserted his chubby fingers 
into the waistband of her candy cane underpants.   

The little elf's eyes went wide with panic when she surveyed the 
countless smiling faces watching her through the window.  Realizing 
that her legal defense was a bust, the quick-thinking elf decided 
to try another tack. 

"Please, Santa, let me keep my panties up," she pleaded.  "I'm 
sorry I was naughty!  Don't spank me bare!" 

But the angry Kris Kringle ignored her frantic pleas, and soon the 
candy cane panties were in a childish tangle around her knees. 

"Do you promise to be a good little girl?"  

SPANK! 

"YES, SANTA!" 

"Do you promise to be polite to all the boys and girls!”  SPANK! 

“Yes Santa!” 

“Do you promise to do what Santa tells you when we're on stage?" 

SPANK! 

"Yes, sir!" 

"And will you stop glaring at the men when they look at your legs?" 

SPANK! 

"Yes!" 

"Do you promise to change into your costume here in the house each 
morning, so that the men who've been waiting for us to open have 
something to enjoy?" 

"What?" she yelped.  "But that'll mean I'll have to strip naked!" 

SPANK!  SPANK!  SPANK! 

"Yes, Santa!" the little elf cried.  "And I'll change into my 
street clothes here, too, before I go home!" 

Stephanie looked around; the men standing in the line were looking 
at far more than just the pretty girl's legs.  The girl's cute red 
fanny was squirming lasciviously, and her kicking legs were 
revealing all of her "Christmas treats." 

The children were completely oblivious to the sounds coming out of 
Santa's house.  They were playing on the floor or chattering with 
their brothers and sisters about what they were going to say to 
Santa.  But every window in Santa's plywood house seemed to have 
dozens of adult male eyes eagerly watching the pretty elf's 
shameful ordeal. 

The smiles and snickers from the huge audience demonstrated that 
the men of the community strongly approved of Santa's management 
techniques.  Stephanie watched intently herself as the humiliated 
young woman wiggled her bare bottom in front of the leering, 
lustful audience.   

Santa chuckled as a pretty blonde elf with an impish smile entered 
the tiny house with her video camera and began recording the 
proceedings.   

Obviously the naughty, spanked elf had not endeared herself to the 
other elves in Santa's workshop! 

"Good!" he said.  "Now, if you decide to sue...."  SPANK!  "Or call 
the police...."  SPANK!  SPANK!  "We'll have plenty of evidence!" 
SPANK! SPANK! SPANK!  "Of course, in that case, I wouldn't be 
surprised if this little video ends up all over the Internet!" 

"You can count on it, Santa!" the smiling newcomer said, merrily.  

Stephanie had both spanking and exhibitionistic fantasies, but she 
had never imagined seeing the two at once.  She clenched her thighs 
together tightly as she watched the blushing elf wiggle her red 
fanny lewdly for the men.  

Stephanie was far too prim and conservative to ever act out her 
fantasies; she was a respected attorney, after all.  But that 
didn't mean that she couldn't enjoy the show.    

Besides, in this mall, no one knew who she was.

		****************************** 

The young elf who rang up Stephanie's photo purchase a few minutes 
later was a changed woman: obedient, submissive, and almost overly 
polite.   

Poor little elf!  It was hard to act superior and aloof when your 
smiling customers had just watched you get your naughty little 
fanny tanned.   

But Stephanie's mind was elsewhere.  She looked over at her nephew. 
He was sitting on the bench about 10 feet away, intently watching 
the little Christmas train go round and round, oblivious to the 
world. 

She swallowed hard and looked the embarrassed elf in the eye.  "I 
noticed a help wanted sign," Stephanie whispered.  "Could I apply 
for a job as one of Santa's elves?"



Edited by C. Lakewood