Author: Bulgroz the Third
Title: The Adjusters #21 - Happy Birthday
Keywords: MF, mc
Posted: October 3, 2011
Edited: October 3, 2011




			  The Adjusters #21


			    Happy Birthday


The singing was awful, off-key, earbleed inducing--the way it often
was. Jackson yelling to the top of his lungs was simply par for the
course. Still, Daniel thought it was sweet. Grossly embarrassing, but
sweet. The waitresses carried a small cake, joining in the
revelry. Patrons around the restaurant were split between those who
laughed earnestly, those who ignored studiously, and those who scorned
openly. Next to him, Cindy was singing softly, her voice clearest
among the friends at the table, her "Happy Birthday to You!" sounding
like raindrops in a lake. Daniel wondered if she had ever sung on
stage, and tabled the question for later.

He looked around the booth as the waitresses left. Cindy was sitting
next to him, looking lovely as usually. Jackson and Kyra were sitting
opposite, their hands clasped together underneath the table. Remnants
of their dinner were strewn before them, and wine was still flowing
freely. They were on their third bottle. And now they had a small cake
to share. A tablet computer was leaning against the wall of the booth,
running a video conference application through which the smiling face
of Radhu could be seen. Radhu had loaned out the tablet to
Daniel--part of a remote learning project he was doing with a doctoral
student in the Department of Education--so that he could participate
in the festivities without leaving his apartment, something he had not
done in more than four months now.

Daniel felt a dissociation come over him; for a second, he was outside
the bubble, listening in, watching everyone at the table quibble over
which slice of the cake they cared about. He flashed to a similar
scene a year earlier, another dinner for his birthday, this time at
Serena's place--Jenn, Radhu, Serena, and him, the three musketeers. In
less than a year, everything had changed. Jenn--don't think about it,
he chided, she's gone. Radhu was still around, and had not really
changed aside from his physical withdrawal from the outside world. And
Serena...

He had left her a few messages, inviting her to this small dinner
celebration, but she had not returned his calls or his text
messages. All of which had become fairly typical of Serena this
semester. In those rare times when he could pin her down for a drink
or even just a quick chat, she kept talking about how incredibly busy
the year was turning out to be, between her classes, her work at the
paper, her interviews for post-graduation, as well as her continuing
investigative reporting of the New American Deal Association, the
organization that she had discovered had been involved with the
abduction of her friend Marjorie Duquesne the previous semester. All
of which made her absences reasonable and understandable, but he
missed his friend nonetheless.

He looked over at Cindy, who was sharing a joke with Kyra. In many
ways, Cindy had come to play the role that Serena had played for
years--friend, sounding board, confidante. After the kiss they had
shared at the party back in February--already a month and a half
ago--she had respected his wish and did not push any sort of romantic
involvement. She had kept her distances, at least emotionally. But
they had continued hanging out together.

For one thing, she was helping him with his senior project,
Mind-Control Techniques in the Political Forum, in which he wanted to
explore, as he stated in a proposal to his undergraduate advisor,
"electorate manipulation through mind-control technologies, from
linguistic manipulation to pharmaceutical methods." His advisor had
approved the project, once he was convinced that Daniel was not simply
going to write a fifty-pages review of The Manchurian Candidate. For
Daniel, this project was an excuse to investigate the possibility that
indeed foul play had been involved in--well, the events of a few
months ago. And the research had been going well. With Cindy, and
helped by Radhu's eclectic knowledge base and contacts in the online
world, they were looking at the feasibility of curtailing will power
via drugs, neuro-linguistic programming, neuro-cortical stimulation,
subliminal channeling, and hypnotic repatterning, to name but a few of
the more interesting approaches that had been advocated in the
literature. So far, nothing had yielded a workable technique.

It went beyond work, though. With Radhu holed up, Serena unavailable,
and Jenn--don't think about it!--well, he felt alone. He had not
realized how isolated he had become. His circle of close friends was
small, had always been. But he was not keen on a solitary life, not
for long stretches at a time. He liked having someone with whom to
hang out, share moments, talk. And being with Cindy felt natural. So
whether he wanted to or not, he had grown to genuinely enjoy the
company of the short blonde with her sunny disposition and her almost
otherworldly positive spin on practically everything.

Looking back at Daniel as if she had sensed he was thinking about her,
Cindy eyed him curiously. He shook his head, smiled. She smiled back,
somewhat nervously, before downing her glass of wine and refilling it
again. She had been drinking a lot, he had noticed, something she did
not usually do.

Before he could ponder her behavior further, Cindy piped up. "Gifts!"
she said, before reaching down under the table for her bag.

Daniel shook his head. "There's no need for that."

Cindy emerged with a package wrapped with Christmas paper. "Of course
there is. It's your birthday. Here. Happy Birthday!" She saw him eye
the wrapping paper. "Yeah, that. It's all I had on hand..."

Daniel shook his head. He unwrapped the package and pulled out a book.

"Very twentieth century. Actually, no, wait..."

It was an old book, a nice edition, leather bound and gilt decorated,
with green silk markers and red-stained edges. He turned to the title
page. Jean-Jacques Rousseau. The Reveries of the Solitary Walker.

"Wow," he said. "That's incredibly nice."

"Glad you like. I was thinking of getting you the latest Eco--I heard
great things about it--but Serena told me you're more into nonfiction
and philosophy."

"Yeah," he said, turning the book over to admire the spine. "Jenn was
the one big on fiction."

Saying her name out loud broke the spell. Jenn. His fiancee. Or,
actually, ex-fiancee. Two months since he had last seen her, after she
had told him--at first by proxy, through that detective he had hired
to find her, and then through a handwritten letter slipped into his
mailbox--that they were through and had returned his engagement
ring. He had been in shock. And then she had left with Biff, heading
off somewhere in the Caribbean, and as far as he knew, neither had
come back. He had toyed with the idea of following them, toyed with it
seriously, but he never put the plan into action. Those first few
weeks had been a cycle of anger, resolve, and depression--anger at the
situation, at Biff, at Jenn; resolve to discover exactly what had
happened, how Biff had managed to wrench her away from him; depression
at the futility of it all. For those few weeks, he had clung to the
hope that somehow all of these events were explained by something
other than Jenn leaving him because she wanted to, and had focused all
of his efforts on finding some sort of vindication in the research
with Cindy.

Radhu had been worried, had forced Daniel to accept his invitation to
come sleep on his couch for a few nights. Serena had found some time
in her crazy schedule to drop by and try to distract him and cheer
him up. She had come right out and suggested he just go out there and
get himself a pretty little thing to fuck--just sex, release,
venting. A very Serena thing to advocate. She had even said that if
it were not for the fact that they had hung out so much these last
few years that he was like a brother to her, she would fuck him
herself, right then and there. Daniel had looked at her, remembering
very clearly what her body looked and felt like the one time they had
hooked up at that party long ago in his freshman year, before Jenn,
before everything, and he had smiled joylessly. While he did miss the
sex, Daniel had told her, it was really the closeness and comfort
that he craved. Serena had merely rolled her eyes.

He regained a measure of sanity following his mother's phone call. She
had contacted him after having been alerted by whatever sixth sense
mothers had for such things, and when Daniel had explained to her what
had happened, she had offered to take a break from her busy life--she
was head surgeon at a major hospital in Chicago--to come visit. Daniel
had thanked her, profusely, and had told her that that was not
necessary, but that he would find a way to visit her before the end of
the school year. The call had been inspired, and Daniel did not put it
past his mother to have been completely aware of its effect on her
son. After all, she had lost her husband--Daniel's father--after only
a few years of marriage, and had survived and kept going despite the
pain. There was a lesson there, clearly.

Much more surprising was the call he received from Carole Hansen,
Jenn's mother. She had sounded distraught on the phone, both worried
about him, and worried about her daughter. She had told him that Jenn
had called her to inform her of what had happened and to let her know
that she would be gone for a while, but she had not elaborated on the
details. Daniel had found himself in the admittedly odd position of
defending Jenn's actions to her mother. He liked Carole, and had not
wanted her to worry. Carole had told him how she went to complain to
the police and they said that there was nothing they could do since
Jenn had left willingly. Daniel and Carole had talked a long time, and
by the end of the conversation Daniel had managed to convince her that
Jenn had likely freaked out because of the upcoming wedding and
perhaps nursed a fear of commitment, something for which Carole had
wasted no time feeling responsible.

And now it was a month later, and life had gone on, and a new routine
had evolved, and somehow pain had muted into a dull ache, and he had
started to contemplate the possibility of life without her. He still
did not like thinking about her if he could help it, but he could do
it with an onslaught of emotions. And while he still had this deep
rooted feeling that Biff was somehow involved, the more time passed,
the more this feeling started to feel like a dream, a house of cards
he had built to distract himself from the truth, a truth that everyone
around him kept telling him he had to accept before he went off the
deep end. And the truth was that Jenn was gone, and he was still here,
and life asked to be lived.

It's not giving up, he kept telling himself, it's just accepting the
facts. And when those facts change, I'll change along with them. It
almost worked.

Cindy was looking at him, and he realized that he had remained silent
for longer than expected. He smiled warmly. "This is wonderful,
Cin. Thanks!" He leaned over and kissed her, softly, on the
lips. Daniel heard Kyra giggle.

Cindy blushed slightly--not the reaction Daniel had expected--and
reached for her glass of wine.

Just then someone pulled a chair up at the end of the booth near
Daniel. "My god--I'm sorry I'm so late!" Serena dropped down on the
chair and leaned over to kiss him. "Happy birthday! Hope I didn't miss
too much."

"You're just in time for cake."

"Goodie! Oh, thank you--" she said to the waitress who had just
dropped a drinks menu before her.

"Hello Serena," said Radhu's voice through the tablet.

"Rad? That's new. I see you found a way to join us."

"Indeed. At the very least, as long as the battery survives. May I
say, Serena, that you look positively ravishing this evening."

"Well thank you, kind sir!"

"You okay?" asked Daniel.

"Yeah. Interview ran longer than expected."

Daniel raised an eyebrow and smiled--she was wearing a form-fitting
sleeveless shirt showing a generous amount of cleavage, and a short
and tight skirt that exposed her shapely legs. A tall pair of heels
completed the picture. "That interviewer must have had a good time."

Serena looked down, and pulled her skirt down slightly. "Well,
sometimes it helps when you flash a bit of leg, you know? Loosens
their tongue."

"I bet it does."

"So what were you guys up to when I crashed the party?"

Jackson replied. "We had reached the gift phase. Hi Serena."

Daniel lifted his book. "Rousseau."

"Very nice. Didn't know you read French."

"I don't. Translation."

"Slacker," replied Serena, perusing the drinks menu.

"As for me," added Jackson, "here." He pushed a small envelope across
the table. Daniel pulled out a gift certificate.

"Shroedinger's Games--nice! Thanks."

"Wasn't quite sure what you wanted, so I went with generic but
fun. Obviously."

"Well, I'm glad I did not come unequipped then," piped in Serena. She
pulled a box out of a bag she had laid at her feet without Daniel
noticing. "Happy birthday, Daniel!"

Intrigued, Daniel opened the package. His breath caught when he saw
what was inside. He looked up at Serena. "How did you...? Where did
you find...?"

"Took some work. Lots of work, actually. But I managed to find someone
willing to sell me his."

Daniel looked at her, a troubled expression on his face. He tried to
camouflage by teasing her. "Flashing some legs helped there too, no
doubt?"

"Actually, he was a dirty old bastard. He wanted to fondle my tits and
then I had to blow him."

Daniel was not sure she was not telling the truth at that. He shook
his head. "I don't know what to say, Ser. I really don't."

Kyra's eyes volleyed between Daniel and Serena, her curiosity
peaked. "So what is it?"

Daniel paused before pulling a small-scale car model out of the
box. It was a red racing car, maybe eight inches long, in perfect
condition.

"Nice," said Kyra.

"What is it? Ferrari?" asked Jackson.

Daniel shook his head. "This is a Maserati 250F, a perfect
reproduction of the car Stirling Moss drove to win the Monaco Grand
Prix in 1956."

"Wow," said Jackson, "I didn't peg you as a racing guy."

"I'm not, not really. But... but my father was. He had this huge
collection of models, and this was one of his prized cars. I broke it
back... back when I was young." He could not continue. He remembered
so well how he had felt that day, seeing the pieces of the car scuttle
across the floor after he had dropped it while showing it off to some
of his friends that had dropped by house.

Serena picked up exactly where he had left off. She had been one of
those friends. "I remember that day. Your mother was furious. I don't
think I'd ever seen an adult so angry before that."

"That she was." His father's collection was one of the few things that
she had left of him, and she had protected it like a hawk would its
progeny. She had remained angry for almost a week after the incident.

"This means a lot, Ser. Thanks."

"Don't mention it."

He hugged her. At that moment, Daniel felt bad about the distance that
he had let grow between them over the last few months.

"Things are going to calm down some for you by the end of the
semester, yes?" He asked her. "I'm worried you're pushing too hard."

Serena shrugged. "I'll survive."

There was a pause in the conversation, everyone at the table falling
silent. Then Kyra broke the silence. "Huh, I have something for you
too, Daniel."

She reached under the table and pulled out a large wrapped
rectangle. He ripped off the paper carefully. It was a painting--an
alpine scene, showing a valley between two tall mountains, the one on
the left rocky and strewn with lichen, the one on the right blanketed
in snow and a monument to quiescence. A pair of mountain goats were
caught sauntering up the slopes of the rocky outcrop, as if unwilling
to disturb the whiteness the snowy ledge. In the background, the
mountain range continued, majestic, unperturbed. aloof.

"Kyra... it's... it's beautiful."

Everyone at the table agreed. Kyra flushed, pride mixing in with not a
little bit of embarrassment. "It's nothing," she said.

"How did you know?"

"Cin. She told me you liked mountains. And I was looking for something
to paint, and I wanted to do something for you because--well, because
of the rough patch you're going through--so something soothing,
rejuvenating, replenishing. It's not much, but it's honest. Plus, it's
a nice change from drawing cutouts of body parts."

"Wow... this is so incredibly sweet. Thanks! Jackson, kiss your
girlfriend for me."

"With pleasure!" And Jackson leaned over to kiss Kyra's rosy lips, and
lingered there long enough for Kyra to gently hit his shoulder to get
him to stop.

"Jackson! There are people around!" she half-laughed, half-frowned.

"That's what makes it fun, no?"

Kyra blushed furiously.

Meanwhile, Daniel had turned the painting around to show Radhu through
the tablet.

Serena was getting impatient at the waitress for not stopping to take
her drink order, and excused herself to go and try to find her or
anyone willing to serve her something. Her heels clacked on the
restaurant floor as she hurried down the aisle.

"So Kyra, when are you going to decide to expose some of your work?"
Cindy asked.

"I don't know. I don't think it's very good. I doubt a gallery'd be
interested."

"Oh come on, it's great. People love it. I'm sure you could start
small."

"Maybe. I don't know. I gotta say, I kind of like just painting for
myself for fun--or for friends."

"There's a University-wide little expo every spring where they
showcase artwork from students and faculty," mused Daniel. "Maybe you
could put up a couple of pieces. Anonymously. So as to not compromise
your artistic integrity."

"You think I'm silly, don't you?"

"No. But I think you have talent, and you should parade it."

"I second that," chimed Jackson.

"Third," added Cindy.

"I would fourth if not for the fact that it would sound utterly
redundant," said Radhu, from the tablet. Behind him, something
beeped. He made a face, and he disappeared from the frame,
momentarily. He was frowning when he returned.

"Everything okay there, Rad?" asked Daniel.

"Yes, everything is under control.  I do find myself having to
investigate a recent development. I will see you later, yes? Are you
still expecting to visit me later this evening?"

"That's the plan."

"Perfect. I will therefore see you later. And please do not forget the
tablet. Happy birthday once more. Radhu out."

"Bye." Everyone waved.

Kyra turned to Cindy. "So, Cindy, have you figured out what you were
going to do after leaving here? You're still graduating, aren't you?"

"Kindda. I've applied a few places, but I'm really looking at grad
schools. I just got a few acceptances this week, so it's really a
matter of choosing."

"Where?"

"Oh, nowhere, really."

"Come on, spill it."

"Stanford. Princeton. Columbia."

"Holy fuck," piped Jackson. "That's some high-class list there. What
did you do, suck off the deans to get in?"

Cindy smiled patiently. "Wish it were that easy. No, no--I did it the
hard way."

"What for, master's, or doctorate?" asked Daniel.

"Doctorate. Probably economics, although the interaction with game
theory and computer science is also intriguing."

Daniel nodded, lifted his glass. "Well, kudos. To smarts and beauty!"

"Cheers!"

"Where's Serena?" asked Daniel, after the toast. He turned around,
looking for her.

He saw her further down the aisle, by the wall, speaking to a young
man. With her heels, she was as tall as he was. He had a hand on her
arm. She was looking at him, her head tilted, her chest thrust out,
one leg forward pressing against the man's own. He was running a hand
up and down the side of her body, finally settling down on her thigh,
after having raised the hem of her short skirt even higher. Serena
seemed not to mind, and in fact leaned forward to offer her lips to
the young man, who accepted them eagerly, and they enlaced and kissed
in their corner of the restaurant. The young man pulled Serena close
against him, the hand on her thigh now squarely on her ass, pushing
her groin against his.

"Looks like she made a friend," commented Kyra, who had leaned out
into the aisle to catch the action.

"Yeah, that was fast," said Daniel. He knew his friend did not waste
time making romantic connections--or breaking them, for that
matter--but this was fast even for her. Unless the young man was her
current flame and Daniel simply had not kept up with Serena's love
life.

"Hey, isn't that Nathan from your frat?" Kyra was asking Jackson.

Jackson made a face, and took a moment to answer. "Looks like him, for
sure." He smiled nervously. "I didn't know he knew Serena."

The kissing couple, after breaking their enlace, headed to the exit of
the restaurant, arms wrapped around each other's waists. The birthday
party watched them go.

"Did she really take off like that, ditching us?" asked Daniel.

"Looks like," replied Cindy, reaching for her wine.

Daniel frowned. Serena had always been abrupt and could be downright
rude in pursuit of a story, but she usually did not treat her friends
that callously, not for a boy. That the boy in question was a member
of Delta Iota Kappa was not overlooked. He eyed Jackson,
speculatively.

"You okay?" whispered Cindy.

He nodded. "Yeah." He felt her eyes on him, but was suddenly too tired
to deal anymore. "Just feeling a bit out of it. Give me a minute to
recharge." He picked up his book and opened it up. I am now alone on
earth, no longer having any brother, neighbor, friend, or society
other than myself. The most sociable and the most loving of humans has
been proscribed from society by a unanimous agreement. In the
refinements of their hatred, they have sought the torment which would
be cruelest to my sensitive soul and have violently broken all the
ties which attached me to them. I would have loved men in spite of
themselves. Only by ceasing to be humane, have they been able to slip
away from my affection.

He did not pay much attention to the discussion around the
table--Cindy, Jackson, and Kyra were arguing about the university plan
to build a new set of dorms further out on West Campus--and thumbed
mindlessly through the book. The waitress stopped by and the check was
settled.

"You guys up for going to grab a drink somewhere?" finally asked
Cindy. She looked at Daniel. "Our treat, birthday boy." Jackson and
Kyra nodded.

They were about to leave when a beautiful blonde in a tall pair of
boots and jeans so tight they looked painted on approached them. "Hey
guys, I just wanted to drop this off for you before you left." She
distributed four postcard-sized thick and glossy announcements. Daniel
glanced at it. It was a typical university announcement card, the
likes of which he had seen countless times on tables all over campus
proclaiming upcoming shows and special events. This one showed a
montage of several feminine body parts--mostly legs and
asses--surrounding the well-known logo of The Spirited Flesh, the
popular local strip club. "The Spring Amateur Show," advertised the
card, "Saturday April 10 @ 9PM."

"You guys definitely have to come," said the blonde, making sure to
make eye contact with each of them, but lingering especially on Daniel
and Jackson. "It's going to be huge. Lots of sexy girls putting on a
show." She looked at Cindy and Kyra. "You two should consider entering
the competition. Trust me, your boyfriends will love it." She glanced
meaningfully at Kyra. "And you--redheads are usually a huge
hit. Especially one put together like you are." To make sure her
meaning was not misunderstood, she let her gaze travel down and back
up Kyra's tight body, making the redhead blush. "See you there," she
grinned, strolling down the aisle to approach the next booth.

"She's right you know," teased Jackson, earning himself a punch in the
shoulder.

They left the restaurant and found a bar to continue the birthday
celebration. Serena never came back.


				* * *


A few hours later, Daniel and Cindy were walking back towards her
dormitory--Daniel walking her home. Spring always brought a few random
attacks on students, mostly coming from young disenfranchised from the
rural community around North Alexandria that felt left out of the live
of the University, a consequence of the not uncommon Town and Gown
tension in college towns the world over. Nothing too dangerous,
usually: a few muggings, a few instances of harassment falling well
short of sexual assault. But Daniel would have felt odd letting Cindy
walk alone. She had laughed at that, pointing out she more often than
not walked alone without any sort of problem. He had simply retorted
that she was tipsy enough to make the situation different this
time. She had giggled at that before admitting that she had indeed
drunk too much, and that she appreciated his company. And then she had
leaned over conspiratorially and opened her purse. "Although look what
I have."

He had peered inside. "Is that...?"

She had nodded. "Yup. A taser. Courtesy of my father. One of those few
times when... well, when he spared a thought for me." She had made a
face, but had not elaborated, and Daniel had not pressed.

They were silent now, walking slowly in the cool air of the night,
Cindy with her arm under his, leaning against him. Daniel relished the
silence, a welcome respite from the noise and celebration of the
evening. It had been fun, he recognized. Amazing how one's world could
change in a short year.

Cindy seemed content to just walk with him. While she was not as
nervous as she had appeared earlier in the evening, he could still
feel tension from her, hiding under her giggling intoxicated state.

He stole a glance at the blonde. She looked good in the short cocktail
dress that she had donned for the occasion--she rarely dressed up, she
had explained. Good looking, and sweet. While her daily persona seemed
calculated to make everyone think she was a blonde airhead, Daniel had
come to know the quiet almost shy girl underneath the mask.

He was not ready for a new relationship--had no interest in starting
over again. Cindy was a friend, and that was that. He thought back to
that discussion with Serena--why did she leave so suddenly earlier
this evening?--where she advised him to just find someone to have sex
with and work out some tension. She had even suggested Cindy, said the
girl would not mind at all. Daniel had grunted noncommittally in
response. He had an inkling that Cindy liked him--her flirting the
previous semester had been rather intense at times--but since Jenn
left, she had not made a move, even when he was arguably
vulnerable. Instead, she had stood by him and was a friend. Why would
he jeopardize that? Stability. He realized he craved stability.

"What are you thinking?" she asked, softly.

With a start, he saw that they had reached the steps leading to the
entrance of her building. "Do you ever wish things to be the way they
were when you were a kid. I'm thinking, what? Ten? Eleven? Before all
of this drama? Before the teenage years? Before time started
accelerating like nuts?"

Cindy looked at him, a smile that looked bitter on her face. "Back to
ten or eleven? Not really, no."

"I had this pal, Tim, called him Timmy. We used to just hang out, ride
our bikes, listen to some music. Life was good then."

Cindy squeezed his hand. "It's not that bad, now."

Daniel did not reply.

Cindy climbed up on the first step and turned around to face him.

"So we're here," she said, to flesh out the silence. Her nervousness
seemed to have returned.

"We are. So, we're till meeting tomorrow to work on our project,
right?"

"I'm there if you are."

"Perfect. Well, I should thank you for a very nice evening. I had
fun." He leaned over to kiss her. He had not known that he would do it
until he was doing it. Their lips touched, pressed, melted into each
other. Cindy's lips were soft, insistent, yielding. And then they
parted, and her tongue sneaked out to lick over his own lips, teasing
him. Cindy moved closer to Daniel, her body now pressing into his. He
put a hand down her back. He could feel her breasts on his
chest. Unbidden, the image of a naked Cindy--breasts exposed, perfect
legs straddling his lap, tight ass resting on his groin, grinding onto
his dick and riding him slowly while little whimpers of pleasure
escaped her throat--rose in his mind. It came as a shock. He wanted
her. So much for all those resolutions, he marveled. She's a friend,
his internal voice mocked, why would I jeopardize that? And what about
Jenn? He pulled out of the kiss.

Before he could say anything, Cindy spoke with a tremor in her
voice. "Would you like to come up?"

"It's probably not a good idea. Besides, your roommate probably has
plans--"

"She's away for the next few days. Field trip." She paused. "Come on,
just a nightcap. I promise--promise--I'll behave. Besides, I have
something for you."

Daniel pondered, then gave in, the way he knew he would. Stupid,
stupid, stupid, he thought. "Do you have tea?"

"I'm sure we'll find something."

She signed him in, and brought him up to her room. It was one of the
large dormitory rooms that the University reserved for the most
academically accomplished students: central living room and
kitchenette attached to two separate bedrooms. Except for its size, it
had the look and feel of dorm rooms everywhere, including distinct and
vaguely clashing decorating styles.

"Preferences as to the kind of tea?" asked Cindy, headed to the
kitchenette

"Huh, not really. Green if you have some, otherwise, any kind of
herbal. A bit late for caffeine for me." He sat on the futon couch, a
comfortable affair overloaded with pillows. On the coffee table before
him, magazines were piled up, from Cosmopolitan to Discovery, along
with at least one French philosophical magazine. And several old
paperbacks: he spotted Robots of Dawn, Stranger in a Strange Land, The
Martian Chronicles, Tarnsman of Gor.

"Green tea," said Cindy from the kitchenette. "Melinda's got some
here. She went on a health kick last year--didn't last but we
inherited all this weird food. And green tea. Ah, there it is. I
didn't know you drank that."

"It's a new thing. Melinda--your roommate right? What's she studying?"

"Yeah, Melinda. If you ask me, she really studies old timey sci-fi,
and puts up a front about studying robotics. Probably just so that she
can say she programmed Asimov's three laws into her robots."

"Asimov's laws, huh?"

"Spend enough time with my roomie and it's crazy what you pick up."

"So this is geek central, then."

Cindy came back to the couch carrying a tray with a tea pot, a mug,
and large glass. "That dig would be a lot more effective on me if I
hadn't already seen your friend Radhu."

Daniel flinched. "Touche. You're not having tea?"

"Nope." She pointed to the glass filled with a transparent liquid in
which a lime wedge was floating. "Gin and tonic."

She sat down next to him. While he poured himself some tea, she downed
nearly all of her drink in a few swallows. Before he could comment on
it, she handed him an envelope. "Your second gift," she said, a
nervous giggle on her lips.

He looked at her. "Cin, you didn't have to. Your first gift was
already way too generous."

"This is different. This is... just open it. I..." She fidgeted as he
took the envelope.

"Cin, what's with you tonight?"

"Nothing! Nothing. Just... I'll be right back, okay? Just open it."

She nearly ran to one of the bedroom doors, leaving Daniel to wonder
what was going on with her. He looked at the envelope. It was the size
of a birthday card. He opened it, pulling out what was indeed a
card. He smiled at the joke setup on the cover, and opened the card. A
small folded piece of paper fell out. All around the joke punchline on
the card--You're lucky I didn't think it was your barf-day! Ha!
Ha!--Cindy had scribbled a message. Daniel--you have made the last few
months incredible. I don't think you could ever know why, or just how
much. You are simply wonderful, and I feel privileged to have you
close. Thank you for your patience and understanding. You have been an
amazing friend. Use the attached at your convenience. Love, Cindy.

He was confused. Patience? Understanding? He picked the folded piece
of paper. Inside, seven simple words. Good for one blow job, anytime,
anywhere. It was signed Cindy. He stared at the piece of paper a long
time, conflicting emotions fighting it out in his chest. The first was
an overpowering feeling of lust. He had been aroused by her kiss only
minutes earlier, and now the vision of Cindy on her knees worshipping
him lovingly, her blonde hair bobbing, lips stretched out around his
dick, tongue dancing around its head, her mouth sloppily bobbing up
and down--would she take the lead, sucking him aggressively, hungrily,
or would she want him to be in charge, letting her mouth be a
receptacle for his desire?

Underneath this flash of lust was the stark reminder of what he had
lost. And the accompanying pain. This paper in his hands. Good for one
blow job, anytime, anywhere. It could not be a coincidence, could it?
It was too much like that board game that he and Jenn had played the
previous semester--What is thy Bidding, my Master?--during which she
gave him essentially carte blanche to explore his control
fantasies. He had learned a lot about himself, a lot about Jenn, and
the two of them, he liked to think, had grown closer after the
experience. Until Jenn left, of course. And now this. The universe
mocking him.

While Daniel rode the wave of his feelings, Cindy returned. "I was too
freaked out to be in the room when you opened it," she said, her voice
small, anxious.

She had swapped her dress for a thigh-length large tee shirt, blue
with a large decal of Minnie Mouse on the front looking very happy to
be nestled between a firm pair of breasts. Cindy's marvelous legs were
exposed--and while she was not showing less skin than she had in the
short dress she had worn earlier, it seemed even more revelatory
now. That her small feet were bare--her toenails were lacquered pink,
he registered absently--made her look even more vulnerable. Looking
back up, another memory blossomed in his mind. When Jenn had her
nightshirt on she usually went pantiless, something he had taken
advantage of many a night. His face tightened at the memory. This was
indeed incredibly stupid. I should leave.

Looking worried about the expression on his face, Cindy slowly made
her way to sit next to him. She had a new drink in her hands, and
sampled it, eyeing him nervously.

"Cin, what is this?" He lifted the paper. He was trying to keep his
voice even.

"Your second gift."

"I got that part, thank you. But why that particular gift?"

Cindy giggled, her smile flattering. "Doesn't every guy in the world
like blow jobs?" She leaned back, her body language a mixture of
casual and defying, and she drank some more.

"That's not what I mean. Why a card like that?"

"It was a just an idea..."

"Don't give me that. You know exactly what I mean. So I repeat, why a
card like that?" He stared at her, hard. She looked back at him for a
beat, before averting his eyes. He could see her jaw clench, then
relax. She sighed, took another sip of her drink.

"Serena... Serena told me."

Great, he thought. "Told you what?"

"About the game, the game you were playing last semester, with... with
Jenn and stuff, and she said how much fun you had, and it sounded like
a cool idea, and I just..." She took another mouthful of her
drink. Her hand was shaking. "I just thought you might enjoy it. Keep
you distracted a bit. And maybe we could have some fun together." Her
voice was growing small.

Were he to have been paying attention, Daniel would have seen that
Cindy was breaking down--the happy-go-lucky girl with a permanent
smile on her face was slowly losing her assurance and her
self-control, and seemed on the verge of tears. But he was getting too
upset himself to notice any of that. "Have some fun together? Is that
it? That's what you were thinking about? Some fun? How could you?"

"If you don't like it--"

He took a deep breath. "It's not a question of liking it or not. Look,
leaving aside the fact that that was something personal that you had
no business knowing--that's probably something that I'm gonna have to
settle with Serena and her big mouth--you have no idea, okay? You have
no idea what this does, what this means, what this leads to!" His
voice was rising. He was shaking the piece of paper between them like
an over-the-top attorney in a David Kelley production.

"You're upset--"

"No kidding I'm upset! Do you know what happened? Did you bother
asking more about it? Did you spend even a second wondering if this
was a good idea, or did you just want to have some fun so much that
everything else was minor and not to be bothered with?"

Cindy was shirking before his anger, looking even more anxious, and
worried. "I don't understand--"

Daniel clenched his teeth. "You wanna know what happened? What
happened with that game you mentioned? That game where we had so much
fun Jenn and I?" He realized he was shaking in anger and self-disgust,
but he could not stop himself. "It was all my fault, you see--it was
all me! All me! I've caused this, all of this!" He made a sweeping
gesture. "Did Serena tell you about that day in the Arts Quad--fuck,
you were there!--how I gave her a stupid card and told her go and
flirt with Jackson. I don't even know why I fuckin' did it--I've been
asking myself that question since that day, since the minute when that
fuckhead Biff tried to put the move on Jenn in that field and then
threatened to rape her. All because I sent her out there, all because
I gave her that card, all because I played that stupid game!" He was
almost screaming at that point, and forced himself to settle down and
breathe.

Cindy was looking at him with wide eyes, face aghast, mouth open.

That's the crux, isn't it, he told himself in a cool internal
voice. It has nothing to do with her. She doesn't know. She was there,
but she doesn't know. But now she does. It's all my fault. I caused
it. All of it. Dear God. He felt exhausted, suddenly, his anger spent.

"Oh my God--Dan, I'm so sorry! Had I known... Oh my God! I'm such an
idiot!"

"No, you're not." His voice was tired, slow. "Selfish, maybe, but not
an idiot. How could you have known?" He looked at her. "You've been a
good friend this last month, Cin. And against my better judgment, I
let you be one. And clearly that was a mistake. It was all a plot,
wasn't it? A ploy to... what? Seduce me? Ah! Look at me, I'm
complaining because a girl maneuvered to get into my pants. I guess
that's what all those women mean when they say they feel used, right?
Can't believe I'd get to say that myself." He shook his head, a
grimace on his face. "I have to go."

"Please don't!" cried out Cindy, putting her hand on his arm. "I'm
sorry!"

"Cin, just let me go."

"Don't!" Her voice was panicky. "I take it back, I take it all back!
Don't go! Please!" There were tears in her eyes. She was shaking. She
collapsed back on the couch, grabbing her head in her hands, her eyes
squeezed shut. Her hands turned into fists, and she started to bang
them against her temples, hard, groaning all the while. "Idiot! Fuck
up! Such a fuck up! What were you thinking?" Her voice shook with her
blows. "You couldn't help yourself, could you? Stupid! Stupid!
Stupid!" She was hitting herself so hard that Daniel, all of his own
anger dissipated, had to intervene. He grabbed her hands and pushed
them down. She was strong and was resisting.

"Cin--hey, it's okay. I mean, look, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... You
took me by surprise, I was shocked, a bit hurt, but it's all better
now, okay? I'm not going anywhere, okay? I'm staying with you until we
figure this out."

Cindy opened her eyes and looked at him, tears streaming down her
face. He almost took a step back at what he saw there, pain, rage,
hatred. "You don't understand! I'm an idiot, an idiot! I knew it was a
bad idea! But I did it! I was so envious, I wanted it so bad, I needed
it so bad, so I went and did it and now it's all gone bad and you're
angry and you hate me and you're gonna leave and I'll never see you
again and and and--" Her tears were flowing freely now, and they were
stuffing her nose and she could not breathe any longer and and to take
deep lungfuls of air through her mouth. She had stopped struggling,
and so Daniel reached for a nearby box of tissue to hand to her,
wondering just what was happening. Had he not been the one angry not a
moment earlier? Now that was all but forgotten.

"Cin, I'm not angry, not anymore, and I won't leave--well, yeah,
eventually, you know, to go sleep, but you'll see me again. Cin,
you're kindda starting to freak me out here--"

At that point, Cindy let out a huge sob, and like a damn bursting she
wailed and sobbed and before he knew it he was cradling her in his
arms, her head in his chest, his hands on her back, rubbing softly,
while she cried harder than he had ever seen anyone cry, huge sobs
wracking her back and making her clench her fists into his
back. Whatever was happening, it had to go much deeper than just
reacting to his own outburst.

He let Cindy cry for as long as she needed, until her sobs gave way to
whimpers that themselves gave way to sniffling and labored
breathing. After a while, she reached for a handful of tissue and blew
her nose. Her breathing slowly returned to normal, and she just leaned
against Daniel. She shivered.

When she spoke again, her voice sounded drained of life. "I asked
Serena a few days ago about what you might enjoy for your
birthday. She laughed and said a good lay. I questioned her further,
and that's when she told me about the game you played with Jenn. I'm
sorry, I shouldn't have pushed her to tell me. But when she told me, I
just became insanely jealous. I mean, I knew you loved Jenn--that was
clear as the eyes on your face--and I wanted someone to love me like
that too, but that, what she told me, it just dug deep. It was exactly
the kind of thing I've craved ever since... well, ever since Farid
dumped me." She let the sentence hang in the air, as if it answered
every question Daniel might have had. It did nothing of the sort.

"Who's Farid," he asked softly.

Cindy snorted. "Who's Farid, he asks." She shook her head. "Just the
best and worst thing that ever happened to me. Where do I start?" She
blew her nose again, then leaned back on the couch, her shoulders
slumped.

"How about at the beginning?" asked Daniel, still speaking softly.

"I think I'll need another drink for that one."

"And I think you've had quite enough for the evening, young lady."

She smiled, a small smile that felt forced more than anything
else. "Then how about some of that tea, then?"

He poured her a mup, which she took gratefully, letting her hands warm
up against its sides.

"I guess it started midway through my first year of high school," she
said. Her voice was monotone, almost a drone. "I met this boy. He was
older, a senior. Farid. Cute, pretty smart, and a classic bad boy. He
didn't use drugs or stuff like that, but I'm pretty sure he stole
cars. And he drove this old bike, a real beauty. Anyways, he took a
liking to me. I was a little nerdy girl, pretty much a cliche--big
glasses, no sense of dress, only thing missing were the braces, thank
God! But Farid saw something in me, and pursued me. Not that it took a
lot of pursuing. He took me out to a movie, then to some dinner, then
brought me over to his place. He lived alone in a small apartment. And
there we fucked. I didn't want to. Well, I did, but didn't want
to. It's complicated. But he took my virginity. On his bed. It was the
best day of my life."

She looked in the distance, a dreamy look on her face. Then she looked
back down at her legs, nervously tugging the hem of her nightshirt
down.

"I was broken when I met him," she said after a long silence that
Daniel had not dared interrupt. "Still am, in fact. See, I had made
out with guys before him, but I discovered I had this... block. I
could kiss and stuff, but as soon as things would get too far... well,
I'd freak out. Start fighting back, pushing the guy away. Even though
I might have wanted it originally, I just... yeah, freaked out. Don't
know why. I've been to therapists, and none of them could really
explain it either. Oh, they have theories about this and that and
trauma and protecting my inner self and something about the death of
my mother--" She paused, closed her eyes, took a deep breath. The mug
in her hand was shaking slightly.

"Point is," she continued, "Farid didn't care. Or cared so much it
didn't let it stop him. When I started freaking out that first time we
made out, he just ignore me and kept going, and while I tried to fight
him off he just thrust inside of me, and then it was like he had
unleashed a monster. I fucked him like there was no tomorrow. And that
happened over and over again. We'd make out, I'd freak out, tried to
fight him off, and he'd just take me, and push me through that wall
inside and he'd find that sex-hungry girl on the other side. He's the
only guy I ever met that could do that, push me through that wall. And
that girl on the other side, well, she would have done anything for
that boy. Anything.

"And because of that, Farid owned me. For two years, he could do
whatever he wanted to me. I was a virgin when I met him--afterwards,
there was nothing I hadn't done. For two years, I did everything he
asked me to do, everything. I just surrendered myself. Once in a
while, the wall would rise up again and I'd freak out and try to push
him away but when that happened he just grab me and fuck me and push
me through my wall again, finding a slut ready to do anything for him
with a smile on her face and joy in her heart. Making him happy was
the single most important thing in my life."

Daniel frowned. That sounded crazy. "When you say you did everything
he asked you to do, you mean...?"

"I mean exactly what you think I mean. I fucked whenever and whomever
he told me to fuck.  He taught me everything--how to fuck, how to
suck, how to turn a man on, how to turn a woman on. He got me to wear
dresses and skirts all the time, with boots or heels, anything to show
off my legs. He loved it when we were out and men would stare at me,
wanting me, and always made sure I'd encourage them. He told me to
flash them whenever I could, and I did. And I loved it, to be desired
and objectified like that. And it's not hard to understand why--" She
stopped herself, shook her head. "My junior year, he made me stop by
his place every morning on my way to school to wake him up with a blow
job. Sometimes he'd come in my hair and made me go to class like that,
with his junk stiffening on my head.

"And he'd bring me to parties, and have me change into some lingerie
and parade around all evening, and guys would hit on me and I'd have
to tell them to go see Farid and ask him if he would let them have me
and more often than not Farid would say yes and offer my mouth or my
pussy to the guy to use as he pleased--never my ass, Farid kept it for
himself--and I loved it, I loved it all, loved how he would order me
around, never raising his voice, in his calm tone of his, just looking
at me, saying 'get on your knees and flip up your dress' or 'unbutton
your shirt and let that man see your tits--I want you to look at him
in the eyes while you make your nipples hard.' I get wet just thinking
about it; I can almost hear his voice still." Tears had started
streaming down her face again, and she was kneading her hands together
on her lap.

"Once in a while, he'd punish me--maybe I didn't obey his request fast
enough, or I wore underwear when he had told me not to, or just
because he felt like it. Then he'd put me in this chastity belt--I kid
you not--and he'd keep it on for weeks at a time, doing his best to
turn me on and keep me aroused but without release, all the while he
used my mouth and my breasts for his pleasure. After two weeks I'd be
insane with lust, begging him to let me come, promising to do anything
he wanted--and he'd smile and tell me I'd do anything he wanted
anyways. I'd jump and shiver every time someone touched me, at school,
on the bus. And then finally he'd let me out and I'd rub myself
against him and just like that I'd explode, telling him I loved him,
I'd always love him, as I practically peed on his leg." She dropped
her face into her hands as she sobbed anew.

Daniel, not knowing what to say, reached his arm around her shoulders
and pulled her close, and she sobbed against him for a few minutes. He
did not know what to think.

"I loved him," Cindy said eventually, once her sobs had faded. "I know
I shouldn't have, but I did. I hated some of the stuff he made me do,
but at the same time, I loved it all. I can't explain it. It was just
so... easy to be with him. To just let myself go and do as he said. To
never have to make another decision, to never be responsible for
anything. The good girl, the sane girl in me rebelled at that--maybe
that's what the wall was, good sense--but the little girl inside
craved it like a candy.

"After my high school prom, Farid dumped me. Told me to go, that I was
too bright to spend the rest of my life with a bum like him. That I
would go on to bigger and better things. Save the world, stuff like
that. I protested, pleaded, fought. He never relented. He said that
his decision was final, that he never wanted to see me again, that if
I kept on hounding him he would sell me to a friend of his that kept a
kennel and that he'd turn me into the resident fluffer bitch.

"I was heartbroken. I zombied my way through the last month of summer,
then moved here and tried to move on with my life. And have been
mostly successful. But there's this big chunk missing, right here--"
she touched her sternum, "and I don't know how to fix it." She started
crying again.

Daniel tried to console her once more, holding her close, rubbing her
back. He was dazed, all thoughts of his earlier upset gone. He was
bewildered by the picture Cindy had just painted, and just could not
reconcile it with the image of the girl he thought he knew. Of course,
he knew that there was more depth to her than she let on, little
glimpses of which she sprung on him here and there, such as the
doctoral applications earlier that evening. But nothing had prepared
him for what she had told him.

"It's okay, Cin. You're okay. I'm not going anywhere. Look, I know
it's hard to lose someone. But you'll get over it, you'll see." Even
to his own ears it sounded lame. The same sort of crap they had fed
him when Jenn left.

"You don't understand! I'm broken. I haven't been with a guy for four
years now, except for--" She grunted, then took a deep breath. "I've
got this psychological block and because of it I just can't... I just
can't have sex. And you know what that leads to on most dates? An epic
fizzle. But I want to do it, I really do. I just need a man to push me
hard enough, to not take no for an answer, a man that will possess me
completely, body and soul. Like Farid did." Tears were streaming down
her face again. She pressed closer against Daniel, turning her head to
drop her face into his neck. "I miss him so much," she whispered,
wrapping her arms around Daniel. He hugged her back.

Cindy, in one smooth motion, flipped her legs over his and pulled
herself onto his lap, squeezing him even closer. She was crying
softly, her head on his shoulder. He tried to comfort her as best as
he could, aware of the warmth of her body against his, of how thin her
nightshirt was. Her ass was pressing right into his crotch, and her
breasts into his chest.

"That's why," continued Cindy, her voice low, "when Serena told me
about your little game, I went nuts. Jenn had told her pretty much
everything, you see, and Serena just repeated it to me. Don't be mad
at her, please. I begged her for it, and told her that I was asking in
order to better please you. She wanted to help. She told me how you
were there in the Arts Quad and how you told Jenn to go and flirt with
Jackson, just like that, all cool and collected, all 'go and make him
hard and make him want you,' and it was so exactly what Farid would
have done that it made me all wet." She breathed hard onto his neck,
edging her face closer. "It still makes me wet."

"Had it been me," she continued, "had it been me that you had ordered
to go and flirt with Jackson, I'd have done it. I'd have walked up to
him, slowly, swinging my hips wide, walking with that gait that told
boys that I've got one thing on my mind and I know exactly where to
get it, and I'd have walked right up to him, and he would have turned
towards me with those big baby blues of his and they would have
traveled up and down my body and before he could have said a thing I
would have grabbed his hand and put it on my tit, like this--" and she
did just that, taking hold of Daniel's hand and lifting it up between
their bodies, and pressing it on her breast, firm and full and with a
hard small nipple that Daniel could feel through the nightshirt, and
he was about to protest when Cindy moved on his lap, "and then I'd
have stepped up to him and I'd have kissed him before he could say a
thing," and just like that she slid her lips onto Daniel's and kissed
him hard, fierce, hot, her hand over his over her breast pressing
harder as her tongue slipped through his lips.

Daniel knew he should have resisted. Cindy was intoxicated, emotional,
vulnerable--probably unable to make any kind of decision right
then. But he was himself overwhelmed by the physical and emotional
tensions in the room. And she felt so good in his arms, and it had
been a long time that he had not felt someone close, and her lips were
so soft, and her weight was so pleasant on his lap.

When she finally let him go, she kept her forehead pressed against
his, breathing hard. Her eyes were closed. She was still lost in her
fantasy. "I'd have brought him down with me, onto the grass, lying
down on top of him, and as I kissed him he would have run his hands
down my body, making me squirm, then he'd have lifted my little skirt
and pawed by behind through my panties, and I'd have moaned in his
mouth and started shifting my hips to rub my crotch against his dick
and his dick would have been so hard against me I'm sure, and I'd have
been so wet too that I'd have soaked his jeans with my juices. I'd
have made him so hard that he'd be whimpering in need. And then--" her
voice dropped, and she pressed her ass hard against Daniel's cock, and
rubbed it back and forth. Daniel's hand unwittingly dropped to her leg
and the feel of the smooth skin of her thigh under his fingers was
like an electric shock.

"And then I'd have told him to go talk to you, to go ask you if he
could have me, take me, fuck me--for a fee, for a favor, just for a
thank you--and if you'd have said yes I'd have done it too, I'd have
fucked him, sucked him, done anything you'd wanted me to do with
him. I'd have made you hot! I'd have made you proud of me! Please!"
Tears were once more flowing down her face, and she was kissing his
cheeks and his lips and his eyelids, saying "please!" over and over
again, swaying her ass on his lap.

"Cindy--"

"Please! I'll make it so good! The best you ever had! Just take me!
Take me! Please, just take me! I'll fight, I'll scream, I'll scratch,
but just take me--right here on the floor. Rip off my panties, gag me
with them, tie me up, and then just shove into me as hard as you can
and rip me apart! Please!" She sobbed, her words becoming difficult to
understand, as Daniel tried to soothe her. "Please!" she cried, "Just
take me. I need it. Please!" She collapsed in his arms, sobbing
without restraint.

Daniel's mind was whirring like a out-of-control engine, trying to
comprehend all that he had learned and how to deal with the poor girl
cradled in his arms. It was as if a levee had broken deep in her mind,
and everything that had been kept at bay had come pouring out. He had
to navigate this carefully. He had not intention of forcing himself
onto her, and certainly not now, not in the state she was in. But an
out and out rejection might well crush her. And he did not want to see
her crushed. He cared about her. What to do? Cindy was now quiet in
his arms, her head on his shoulder, her body inert. His shirt was
drenched with her tears. She had cried herself out.

"Cin, listen to me. I'm sorry, but I can't force myself on you the way
you want. I just can't. It would not be right. Yes," he said before
she could articulate the obvious objection, "even if that's what you
want, deep inside. I can't know that, not in the state you're in."

Cindy breathed deeply against him, then pulled back without looking
him in the eye. Her voice was flat, empty, exhausted. "I understand. I
told you, I was an idiot. How could you want me? I mean, look at me,
I'm a wreck, a useless shell. I've got nothing to offer anyone. No
wonder Farid left me--he knew the truth. I'm worthless. I'm nothing."

Daniel shook his head. "Now you're being an idiot. You're not
worthless. Far from it. And all I said was that I wouldn't force
myself on you..."

Cindy finally looked at him, confused. She had picked up on the lilt
at the end of his sentence. "Then, what...?"

"Cindy, please stand up."

She looked at him, hesitant. He had the distinct impression that she
had reached a point where thinking was physically difficult.

He rolled his eyes, a smile on his face. "For someone that
wants--begs--to be told what to do, you don't really obey orders
quickly, do you?"

"What...?"

"Just do it. Please stand up."

She did. Daniel looked at her, letting his eyes roam down her
body. She was beautiful--different from Jenn, certainly, but beautiful
still. Her nightshirt hugged her body, and her breasts were pulling it
taut. He let his eyes glide over her legs, smooth and soft and
flawless. He felt a stirring of guilt, thinking about Jenn, but he
pushed it out of his mind. In a weird way, Cindy needed him right now,
and perhaps he needed her in return.

When he looked back up, Cindy's eyes were boring into his. Her face
was still wet from her tears, her eyes red, but she no longer looked
sad. She looked--expectant. As if she was holding her breath waiting
to see what he would do next.

Daniel smiled at her, and after a moment she smiled back, a hesitant
smile.

"Good," he said, nodding to the floor, "now, please lie down."

After another hesitation, Cindy did. There was enough room next to the
coffee table for her to stretch out, and she did. Her nightshirt
pulled up with the movement, and revealed a thin pair of white lacy
panties happily nestled where her thighs met.

Daniel stood. Cindy kept her gaze fixed on him, without saying a
word. He was not even sure she was still breathing. He knelt at her
feet. She did not move. When he put his hands on her ankles, she
gasped softly. When he gripped those ankles and used them to lift and
spread her legs, she let out a deep breath. He felt her tense up. If
he was wrong about this, he thought, she would start fighting back
soon. He hoped he was not.

"Tell me, this psychological block of yours--does it only kick in when
a man tries to have sex with you?"

"Pretty much."

"Penetration?"

"That, and blow jobs too. So yeah, I guess, penetrations."

"Fingers?"

She had to think about that one. "No..."

"That's what I was hoping for."

He ran his hands up her legs, marveling at the smoothness of her
skin. When his palms were on her thighs--the flesh soft and tight--he
lay down between her legs, his face a few inches from her crotch. Not
only were her panties wet--he could see a spot forming on the flimsy
material--but he could smell her from where he was, a honeydew
fragrance that made him hungry.

He ran his hands further up and slipped them under her ass, cupping
her cheeks, and pulling her up. Cindy gasped. "Dan, what are you
doing?"

"You really gotta ask?"

He landed a soft kiss through her panties, making her shiver. He could
feel the bumps of her pussy lips through the material, and could taste
her juices. He kissed her again, and again, pressing lightly every
time, and was rewarded by a moan, and an effort on Cindy's part to
push her hips up and seek a deeper contact.

"Ooooh! You... you really shouldn't..."

Daniel lifted his head, and admired the view from where he was,
staring up at her upper body with her nightshirt rucked up, exposing
her stomach but still covering her breasts, two soft mounds of flesh
tenting the cotton.

"Nonsense. It's my birthday, isn't it? Please push your panties
aside." It was not an order, just a request, and Cindy let out another
soft moan and sneaked a hand between her legs and delicately, with two
small fingers, pulled aside the thin material covering her pussy.

Daniel took just a few seconds to admire the beautiful pussy in front
of him, its blood-engorged lips dripping with arousal and a trimmed
patch of blonde fur just above it, before he closed in and ran his
tongue in one long lick up from the bottom of her slit up to the hard
knob of her clit. Cindy's breath caught, and her pelvis jerked in a
long spasm.

Daniel gave three more long licks in exactly the same fashion,
eliciting exactly the same reaction, relishing the fresh new taste, an
overly sweet taste, with almost no musky kick--not unpleasant at all,
just unexpected. He plunged his tongue deep into Cindy's pussy, trying
to reach in as far as he would go, licking and thrusting inside, his
lips smashed against her own lips. She seemed to enjoy it, and her
free hand--the one not holding her panties out--came to rest on top of
his head, pressing down softly, and Daniel took it as
encouragement. He redoubled his efforts, licking and sucking with wild
abandon, enjoying the feel of Cindy's thighs sometimes pressing on the
sides of his head when sensations were too strong for the petite
blonde.

After several minutes, Daniel lifted his head to breathe, and Cindy
took advantage of the pause to quickly slip off her panties, who were
well on their way to ruin anyways. She then sprawled back on the
floor, her beautiful legs spread wide, and Daniel admired shamelessly
the spectacle of her legs meeting together with a pussy shiny with his
saliva and her own copious juices. Cindy's eyes were closed, her lips
partly open, and one of her hands was playing with one of her breasts
through her shirt, kneading it softly, small movements of her hips
betraying her high state of arousal.

Daniel lubed his fingers on the juices leaking down from her pussy and
smoothly slipped two inside the warm and welcoming slit. A silky
tightness greeted him as he pushed two fingers as deep as they would
go, to the background music of Cindy soft groans. Her pussy sucked his
fingers in, and Daniel could not help wonder how it might feel to sink
his cock insider her.

He pulled his fingers out slowly, his eyes trained on Cindy's hand
still grabbing her breast, and shoved them in harder. Once more and
then he dove down and wrapped his lips around her hard clit and
sucked. Cindy stiffened, her hands reflexively grabbed his head, and
then she lifted her legs and held them up, with a hand behind each
knee to provide him better access.

He sucked her clit hard, rhythmically, almost violently, as he pumped
two finger in and out of her. Juices were streaming steadily down, and
Daniel wondered how Cindy would react were he to slide in a finger
inside her thoroughly lubricated anus. She might not even notice given
her current state. Then again, it may be enough to send her over the
edge.

Instead, he added a third finger to the two already pumping in and out
of Cindy's pussy, forcing her to open up wider, which she did with a
groan that shifted quickly back into the soft moaning she had been
continually emitting. Her breathing was rapid, and her legs were
starting to shake, whether due to excitement or fatigue he could not
tell. He just concentrated on bringing her to orgasm.

Which she did, all of a sudden, her body stiffening up, her breath
catching, her legs scissoring over his back and squeezing his head
between her thighs--her crotch pushed hard into his face. Daniel could
feel her pussy walls tighten forcefully around his fingers, and he
pushed them inside as far as they would go and left them there,
enjoying the feel of her pussy spasming wildly around them, all the
while sucking hard on her throbbing clit.

Cindy peaked for a long time. Daniel did not mind. He marveled at the
difference between her orgasms and Jenn's. Jenn had always been very
vocal, unafraid to talk and scream and urge him on. Cindy had been
quiet, almost silent, except for low moans and gasps. And whereas Jenn
would come explosively, in a grand release, Cindy had reached her
plateau correspondingly gently, as if pleasure had sneaked up on
her. It was fascinating. Again, he had to make an effort to push
further thoughts of his ex-fiancee out of his mind.

Cindy urged him up by grabbing his head. He barely had time to wipe
the excess of her juices from his lips and chin before she sought his
mouth and kissed him with passion, not seeming to mind that he must
have tasted of her, wrapping her arms and legs around him to cradle
him close. She was still shaking.

When she let him go after a long kiss, she had trouble catching her
breath. "Wow," she mumbled, looking at him. "That was something. Thank
you."

"My pleasure," he replied. She was adorable.

"Oh no, definitely my pleasure this time. I'm pretty sure." She
sighed, stretched out. "You're not going to... you know, take me, are
you?" She sounded disappointed, in a lazy what-can-you-do way.

Daniel smiled, shook his head. "Not tonight, Cin. I can't do it. I
hope you understand. There's--"

"Sssh," she said, kissing him quickly on the lips, and interrupting
him. "It's okay, I understand. But keep the paper, okay? And if you
ever change your mind, just give it to me. It'll be our signal."

She kissed him again, a longer kiss that engulfed them both for a
time.


				* * *


Stepping out into the night upon leaving Cindy's dormitory, a bag
containing Kyra's painting as well as Serena's small-scale model under
his arm, Daniel pondered what had just happened, going over Cindy's
story again. In the still air of the night, it felt like an odd dream.

Working backwards from the quasi-tryst with Cindy on the floor of her
living room to the dinner back at the restaurant, he remembered that
he had promised Radhu he would call him. He did so.

"Hey Rad. Sorry it took so long to get back to you."

"Not to worry, Daniel. I trust you had a pleasant denouement to the
evening festivities?"

"Yeah, I think so. Weird, but good. The world's a strange place, my
friend."

"Sharper minds than ours have long been stating something similar,
albeit using mathematical equations to highlight just how strange the
strangeness may be."

"I'll take your word for it. So, you wanted me to call when I was
done?"

"Yes, I did." He paused. "You remember the software I have installed
to monitor cameras on campus and an a few in the city? They have
picked up something of interest."

"Really? Did you find Snowman?"

"No," added Radhu, with a slight hesitation. "You may want to come
over and see it yourself."

"Rad, is everything okay?"

"I am unsure, Daniel. I am utterly unsure."

Fifteen minutes later, Daniel was buzzing at his friend's door. "So,
what's going on?" he asked Radhu after the Indian let him in.

"Please sit down, and direct your attention to the monitor to your
right. This was flagged by my program at fifteen hundred today and
recorded automatically. I saw it when I reviewed the daily logs." He
tapped his keyboard, and the blank screen of the monitor flashed to
life, showing a scene that Daniel took a moment to place. "The Student
Center?"

Radhu nodded. "Yes. This is the feed from the camera in the north-east
corner of the main seating area. This point of the view is the most
panoramic. There is a secondary feed from a side camera that I can put
on this other monitor here."

Radhu tapped his keyboard again, and the image on the second monitor
flashed as well. The camera was aimed at one of the exits from the
center, and captured a few of the tables closest to the exit. Daniel's
jaw tensed. Biff and his crew were clustered around two tables that
had been pushed together, playing cards, the remnants of fast food
meals littered around them. There were a few girls with them, talking
and laughing, once in a while reaching over and kissing one of the
guys. There was a time stamp in the lower left corner, indicating a
bit past three o'clock in the afternoon.

Radhu pointed. "The first monitor. Exiting the coffee dispensary."

Coming out of the Starbucks tucked away in the far corner of the
Student Center, two coffees in her hands, was Jenn. But unlike how
Daniel had ever seen her in public before.

She wore a bright fuchsia dress that really was more of a long sweater
and that clung to her body like a second skin, barely reaching the
upper half of her thighs, exposing her long delectable legs down to
where they slipped into a pair of black stiletto-heeled boots. She
walked with assurance and grace, and she exuded sex. Men, and not a
few women, turned to stare at her or just track her as she walked by,
and Daniel had no difficulty understanding why, or imagining what they
were thinking. Jenn made her way through the crowd completely
oblivious to the stares, without any suggestion of self-consciousness.

Jenn glided her way to the tables where Biff and his posse were
assembled, her hips swaying suggestively, maybe due to the tall heels,
maybe out of a conscious attempt to entice. When she arrived, she
handed one of the two cups she was carrying to Biff, who stood up
before taking it, putting it down on the table, and pulling Jenn to
him.

Jenn molded her body to Biff's, holding on to him with one arm while
still holding on to her own cup, and kissed him, a long wet kiss that
offered him plenty of opportunity to run his hands down her back and
settle on her ass, which she obligingly made available by going on her
tiptoes. Everyone at their tables started cheering--that was clear,
even though the monitor did not convey sound--making a commotion that
attracted much of that part of the Center's attention.

Biff's hands were freely roaming Jenn's body, threatening to lift her
dress off, while he practically slobbered all over her face. Jenn
lifted one of her long legs, and Biff slipped one of his hands under
her thigh, under her dress, while she wrapped that leg around Biff's
waist. She let her weight rest completely in Biff's hands.

Jenn seemed completely enthralled by it all. Daniel was
astonished. This was so public, so exhibitionist, so in-your-face that
it was almost obscene. Things hardly improved when the couple stopped
their embrace. After Biff sat down on a seat, he patted his thigh and
Jenn obediently sat down astride his lap, one arm around his
shoulders, and nuzzling his neck, her long hair spilling across Biff's
back, the perfect picture of the devoted girlfriend. They were watched
carefully by several students around them, many eyeing lustfully
Jenn's lithe form and long legs, undoubtedly dreaming about what she
might feel like were she sitting on their laps. Then Biff pulled her
head back and kissed her again, and that kiss was just as long and as
passionate as their last one. Jenn was wriggling on Biff's lap, and
running her hands through his hair.

"I'm sorry, mate," said Radhu, his voice low. "I can hardly fathom how
that must feel like. But I presumed that you wanted to see this with
your own eyes."

Jenn was joking with some of the girls, swinging her legs, looking
like she was in the best spot in the world. Biff, one arm possessively
wrapped around her waist, would pull her down to him to kiss her at
regular intervals.

"It's okay, Rad. I guess that confirms it. They're together, the whole
world knows it, and even though I can't understand it, she
seems... happy."

On the monitor, Biff ran his big hand down Jenn's back, then pulled on
her hair sharply so that her head tilted back and he dove onto her
neck, kissing and licking and sucking, while Jenn laughed. Biff ran
his hands down to her ass and gripped it hard, pulling Jenn towards
him. Biff was pawing her and making a public show of it.

Daniel turned away from the monitor. "Okay, Rad, okay. I get
it. They're back. They're together. I don't need to see any more." He
sighed, shook his head. "Fuck, that hurt more than I thought it
would. We've got to figure out what's going on, Rad. What Biff did to
her."

"There's more--"

"I've seen enough, thanks. Just write the Cliffs Notes if it's
important, and tell me some other time. Right now, I think I need to
be alone."

He left, leaving Radhu to worry about his friend. Radhu called Serena
to see if she could spend some time with Daniel, to make sure he was
not alone, but the reporter never answered her phone.