Interesting, and thought provoking.  I was waiting for something more, but I did not really feel cheated by the ending.  I was struck by the contrast between the completely neutral, unexpected act of apparent affection from a stranger (the saleswoman) and the rather mechanical response from her husband; perhaps a touch of irony.

Desdmona
(The Fishtank)

You have a marvellous way of writing in a “foreign” setting that makes it all seem normal. This isn’t the first story you’ve written where I was struck with this idea. You managed the same thing in “Extracurricular Love”. I have limited experience with nudist communities, but it seems to me, as in every world, there are going to be people from all ends of the sexual spectrum. This is one of the ways you make the story’s setting seem so natural--a common theme of all communities, if you will. The real clincher to this sort of normalcy idea is that people are all the same, with or without clothes. Relationships stagger, couples diverge, and people are surprised into inaction by the acts of strangers.

I think it’s a misconception to believe that people who are exhibitionists are automatically into the darker areas of porn as someone before me hinted. I may consider myself free enough to show my body. It does not mean I want excrement liberally applied. Danielle shows a very real concern when she wonders what will come from her husband’s proclivities. I don’t get the impression that she wishes he would stop; only that she hopes it won’t include her.

The real beauty of this piece is the irony of a woman so self absorbed with her appearance that she’s missed the world around her completely. I think it’s easy to associate nudism with freedom, and yet, Danielle isn’t free of anything, except her clothes. The subtle irony is just extremely well done.

Eli the Bearded
(The Fishtank)

I like the shoes binding it together. She is shopping for shoes, the shoestore clerk gives her that shocking, delicious intimacy, the porn that represents the sexual stupor of her marriage is stored in a shoebox.

The universe this has been put into is very intriguing. I like how we have to figure out the norms of it on our own.

mat twassel
(The Fishtank)

Impressive!  What I think really works is the way a pedal point leaps out at the end. “... where it was expected she’d stay while Paul watched the rest of the match.”  Two steps forward, two steps back. What a funny dance the world does!

PleaseCain
(The Fishtank)

An interesting story, and sad.  I like how you’ve created mood and atmosphere without bludgeoning us over the head.  To me, her vanity suggests that she has everything down pat.  Then, the young sales girl with her sweet kiss throws a spanner in the works, and it unravels from there: her composure, her cold home, and her dissipated relationship.  I got all that out of your story, which was much more interesting than my summary here.