CHAPTER FIFTY

Reader’s Note: These are EXCERPTS from Joanne Swift’s Journal for October 12^th (Wednesday).

Joanne has just finished an extremely long masturbation session.

I felt like I had played with myself for hours – I had even put clamps on my nipples like Tom liked to do. It wasn’t that it turned me on to be in pain, but the feeling was so familiar, reminding me of my husband, that I enjoyed the discomfort caused by the biting, squeezing sensation of tight clamps.

My pussy was well worn out when I was finished, and I lay exhausted on 400-count Egyptian cotton sheets in our bed before I noticed Mort Goldman standing in the corner of my bedroom.

“What are you doing?” I shrieked.

“Mistress told me to come with you?” Mort had stood uncomfortably, watching me writhe naked until I satisfied myself at least a half a dozen times, and I hadn’t even noticed. I was shocked, and while I knew he was harmless, I felt guilty that I had been so self-absorbed I didn’t notice the man in my bedroom.

I got up and washed my hands in the sink without hiding my nudity around the little man.

“You sure do have a lot of whips and chains...” Mort offered his observation meekly. I barely even registered his attempt at conversation and ignored him while I dried my hands. I know that’s disrespectful, but Mort has a way of blending into the background. And after the intense self-gratification I just gave myself, it was all I could do to pay attention if even my husband had walked through the door at that moment ready to fuck.

“Do you think Mistress Rachel will use things like that on me?” I heard him mumble his question.

“If you don’t want to serve your sister…” I suggested that he simply stand up to her. My response was more curt than I had intended. “She’s already going to make you reveal everything to your wife, and then she has nothing on you,” I didn’t mean to sound harsh but my mind was anywhere but on his situation. I was perturbed he had spied on me- or perhaps I was just angry with myself that I felt very little shame about the fact he had- as I got dressed in my smock. He made it very easy to look down on him – because he seemed to revel in his smallness.

“I always wondered if you were naked under those,” he observed of the simple sarong-style robe I wrapped myself up in. It fit my form quite well and yet covered me in all the correct places so that I could have very little on while still blending in. I wore this style of apron so often that no one seemed to realize it was little more than a loose wrap.

“You’ve seen me undress many times,” I said, shooting him an annoyed glance while I made myself presentable and fixed my hair in the mirror.

“I just want to see how far she’ll go with me,” Mort offered, answering my earlier question excitedly. “I knew she’d spend my money and take advantage of me, but I expected bupkes in exchange. I didn’t think she’d take over my life as a dominatrix.”

“You know,” I spun on my heel and bluntly told Mort, “you sound selfish when you say that. You want to serve and submit, but only for what you get out of it – for the thrill. You think that’s all there is to submission?”

“Why do it if you don’t get anything out of it?” Mort blinked like a timid mouse that was frightened for its life.

He had a point – was I so different in my submission to Tom? I’ve been receiving discipline and learning to please him, but at the same time I’ve been taking pleasure from it. I knew that my outburst was probably transference on my part.

I was probably a little envious of my daughter as well. She seemed to have embraced her submission so openly and completely. She’d been pushed to extremes I would never have considered and not only accepted them, she welcomed them.

If she hadn’t been doing it with such a self-satisfied smirk on her face, this may have been much easier. If she had been grunting, groaning, complaining and reluctant, I could even feel pity for her.

I don’t think she wanted that to happen, and there was a part of me that was enjoying it, and a part of me that felt very guilty about how this was all turning out. I think I envied how Taylor could stop questioning and just be a font of pleasure and amusement.

“I’m sorry, Mort,” I apologized to him for snapping at him.

“That’s okay, Ma’am – I’m supposed to get used to never being apologized to again by a woman.” My neighbor smiled. I had almost forgotten his sister had left me in charge of him while she went out.

“Let’s go check on things downstairs.” I adjusted my smock and prepared to go see if Taylor had been picked up by Mr. Vulgus yet. I half expected Hope Miller to be there already and Donny to be furious that his sister was exposed to his crush when she came over for tutoring. I knew this was a big deal to him and hurried to the door.

“May I masturbate, Ma’am?” Mort asked me almost casually. The request struck me as odd at first.

“No,” I replied. I knew he thought of me as a powerful mistress like his sister – and I came across that way to him at times – but I really preferred my own submission to someone powerful like my husband. “In the future, you will not make such vulgar requests. I will let you know when you may play with your dingus. It is a dingus, isn’t it?” I asked as I reached for the doorknob to my bedroom.

“It is if you say so, Ma’am,” Mort agreed obediently, and walked a pace behind me as we entered the hallway and started down the stairs.

“Where’s your sister?” I asked Donny. He was busy sprucing himself up in the upstairs bathroom. He’d cut himself while shaving the few hairs that grew out of his chin and had acne cream on his face. I nearly choked from the cloud of Axe body spray that enveloped his body.

“Scotty already took her to babysit. We gave her an enema, punished her – although one ass cheek is redder than the other – and fed her,” he stated confidently while staring at himself in the mirror.

“You look fine,” I assured him and asked if his sister shaved before they left as well.

“What? Hope coming over is just casual,” my son lied to me. I knew he was freaking out inside and I was excited for him. He added, “Yes, she shaved and thanked Mr. Vulgus when he came to pick her up. She even reminded him that she had to run home naked tonight when she got to the housing community.”

“You don’t think we’re being too hard on her?” I asked Donny. The casual way he had explicitly spelled out his sister’s discipline and accepted it made me think he didn’t, but hearing it said out loud, it definitely sounded intense.

“Mom? Can you get out of here and let me get ready please?” He shut the bathroom door on me and dismissed my question.

I smiled at Mort and told him to follow me downstairs. I needed to prepare some food for Donny, Hope, and Janie, since I’d be going to the Olive Garden to see if the security guard was going to hold me to his deal. I was nervous about it as I prepared the food, and Mort stood there awkwardly watching me without saying anything.

I had barely started putting together some snacks and dinner when I heard Sandor barking at the door excitedly. He usually alerted us when someone was walking up the sidewalk, but this time he was particularly excited. I tried to hush him and get him in his crate so that I could answer the door, but it took extra effort for me to get the dog to finally relent and get in his crate. I’m sure Mort would have been much easier to convince then Sandor at that point.

I didn’t even get a chance to answer the door when Donny came running down the stairs to get it. It was Hope Miller and her younger brother Darrell. The beautiful blonde cheerleader graciously waited for Donny to invite her in and greeted us as well as Sandor.

Sandor wouldn’t stop barking and yipping from within his crate.

“I have that effect on dogs,” the vivacious cheerleader said with a broad all-American girl smile.

I could tell from Mort and Donny’s faces that she had a similar effect on men, too. The high school senior was certainly a perfect 10 in every sense of the word. She introduced her brother and told me she was here to get some tutoring from Donny for a big physics test.

“Yes, I’m aware.” I smiled at the girl as she showed me her books, almost as if proof.

Donny glared at me as if I were blowing things by being ‘uncool’, so I took his silent hint and excused myself. “I’ll be going out to eat tonight, so I’ll be leaving some food for you both.”

“Oh, hahah, well, I hope you left a lot! I’m hungry!” the bright and cheery girl mused as she rubbed her flat tummy. She was really a ray of sunshine, and her attitude was so bubbly I couldn’t help but feel put at ease. “Are you sure you can trust some teenagers not to get into shenanigans while you’re gone?” she joked.

Donny repeated his glare at me as if begging for me not to answer at all. I understood his worry that I would be ‘uncool’ and mess up his chances. I told her that I trusted my son completely.

“Maybe it isn’t your son you should be worry about.” Hope’s charming smile told me she was clearly kidding and having a laugh, but at the same time I didn’t want to embarrass my son further by joking around with his crush.

“It was nice meeting you and your husband,” Hope called after me as Mort and I walked into the kitchen.

“This is our neighbor,” I started to explain, but before I could answer her Donny had whisked Hope and Darrell upstairs and out of earshot.

It didn’t take me long to finish preparing the food. “What do you think I should wear tonight?” I asked Mort.

“What does one normally wear to a gang bang, Ma’am?” Mort answered. He had stood off to the side while I prepared the food.

“I don’t think it’s going to be a gang bang, is it?” I was mortified that it may very well be. The security guard had given me very little understanding of what he expected other than he planned to have some friends at the same place he took me this morning behind Olive Garden. He was essentially blackmailing me to meet him there again or else he’d reveal my dirty little secrets to everyone, that I had been there earlier today and what I’d done.

Mort was about to answer when Hope came into the kitchen with a smirk on her face to tell me something. “I don’t know if you know this, but your daughter is upstairs naked,” she chuckled.

My eyes grew wide with surprise. Donny had clearly told me Taylor was already babysitting.

The girl clearly didn’t see it as anything to be concerned about – something trivial and no big deal.

“My daughter’s babysitting,” I stuttered in response.

Hope reminded me with a twinkle in her blue eyes that I had two daughters, and I instantly realized she meant Janie. I was beside myself over how this could be.

“I am so, so sorry! Why is she naked?” I started upstairs and Mort followed.

“I don’t know,” Hope laughed, adding that it was probably a phase. “I wasn’t offended or anything by it. I just thought you should be aware because there’s a boy up there with her.”

I left her in the kitchen as I raced upstairs trying to get my head around what I’d just been told. I knew Janie had grown increasingly interested in her sister’s discipline, but I didn’t expect her to be upstairs naked.

Janie can be very trusting, and I placed blame on Jamal for probably talking her into it on the grounds he’d already seen her sister and she should be just as honest as Taylor, or some malarkey like that.

I rounded the corner of the hallway and dashed towards Janie’s bedroom. Donny and Darrell were standing in the doorway, and it looked like Donny was frustrated and trying to convince his sister to get dressed when I ran in.

I was surprised to see Janie’s lithe young naked body completely exposed. Her hands were behind her head with her fingers interlaced and her legs apart. She had her mouth slightly open and pink plastic clothespins from one of her dress hangers attached to her budding, puffy, strawberry-colored nipples.

I wanted to believe that she had been blackmailed or tricked but the smile on her face and the stance she had while she posed told me she was enjoying the attention.

“What on earth are you doing?” I demanded of Jamal who was sitting on her bed, smiling and staring at her.

I was awash not with shame – even though it was probably warranted that my daughter was standing there naked in front of boys like that. I was awash with guilt – the thought that I had put something into Janie’s head like this without her having the capability to understand what she was doing.

Janie answered without looking directly at me. “Negotiating to be my Master, Ma’am.”

“Your Master? He isn’t your Master!” I demanded she get dressed that instant.

“He isn’t, but you won’t train me and I’ve been unruly, prideful, naughty, and disruptive. I want to be trained, and Master Jamal said he would oblige if I begged him properly, Ma’am!”

“Did not,” Jamal adamantly refuted Janie’s accusation, and I believed him. He clarified that she had asked if she would beg him, would he accept her into discipline.

“Yeah, but you said, sir!” Janie answered defensively – now with a look of sour panic spreading across her face that she was being called out for orchestrating this entire thing.

I knew she had no problem with her sister’s discipline, but I was really shocked that she wanted it for herself. The signs were all there, now that I thought about it. She’d been such a good sport about being a helper that I simply didn’t want to believe my little Janie could want or need discipline. Taylor was night to Janie’s bright and sunny day!

Janie could be a mischievous joker, but she seldom meant anything negative or harsh out of her put-downs. And she usually only responded with put-downs when one of her brothers or Taylor had started the exchange. I didn’t see how she could need anything remotely as intense as Taylor, and I was shocked that she was standing fully naked in front of these boys.

“You put some clothes on right now and that’s an order!” I responded angrily. Janie looked dejected, but at the moment I didn’t care how she felt about that. I was more concerned with Donny’s look of resentment toward me that I had messed up his special evening with Hope.

Clearly, even though he delighted in his sister’s torment – he definitely didn’t want Hope to find out about it. I am sure he saw me as partly responsible for what his sister’s behavior right now. I could definitely understand that. Hope was a nice girl with a sense of humor about all of this and had laughed it off – but I knew if she rebuffed his advances he’d probably blame me for spoiling his chances.

I whispered an apology to him, and that seemed to calm him down, even though he glared at Janie.

“I know you didn’t put her up to this, Mom,” Donny whispered back, and took my arm.

“Keep an eye on your sister,” I whispered to him.

Janie stomped around angrily, putting on some skimpy shorts without panties or bra.

“Fine, if you want to be bossed around…” I told her that I would be taking charge, but she would follow my rules and not the same ones I had for Taylor.

“What are the rules, Ma’am?” Janie looked up at me excitedly as she pulled her shirt over her head.

“Your brother’s in charge until I get back! He’s your Master, just like he’s Taylor’s, until then.” I said that for Jamal’s benefit before politely asking him to leave.

Donny looked pleased with my confidence in him. I still hadn’t heard his rules for his sister, but given the circumstances, that I would be stepping out, I really didn’t have anyone else to put in charge. “I’ll go over the rules with you when I get back from my dinner. Until then you behave and do your homework. Your brother is entertaining some guests, so just stay out of their way until they’re finished.”

I walked Jamal downstairs. Darrell and Donny followed behind me to retrieve Hope. I wanted to tell Donny not be too harsh on his little sister, but I would have to find the right time when the others weren’t around.

I stormed back downstairs into the kitchen only to find that Hope was drinking a nice cold glass of milk she had poured herself.

Almond milk.

I nearly fell over with bewilderment as the girl smiled and downed half the glass.

I wanted to grab it from her – at least before Donny could see that she was smacking her lips.

“What’s the matter? Should I not have drank your milk?” Hope looked concerned when she saw that I was furious.

“Oh no, well actually you shouldn’t,” I started to fumble my words.

“It doesn’t taste like almond milk, but it does taste familiar.” The cheerleader smiled at me as she set the glass down.

“Mom got all of the girls in the house on a special diet,” Donny quickly explained with another glare at me as he guided the cheerleader out of the kitchen. “She can be a little possessive about it.”

“Oh, trust me, my mom and I can be the same way, can’t we Darrell?” Hope said as her brother nodded in agreement. “Everything okay with Janie?” she asked me before leaving.

“I don’t think she’ll trouble you again. I really don’t know what got into her. I’m so sorry you two had to see that!”

“I am definitely not sorry!” Darrell smirked.

“You’re such a perv,” Hope said, slapping her younger brother on the shoulder and apologizing for him. “It’s totally understandable – she was probably taking selfies for Snapchat or something?”

“Something like that,” I answered. I told Donny before he left that he was in charge, but not to be too strict on his sister. “If she gets out of hand again, just text me.” I made sure he understood what I was implying before he left. I didn’t want him to start treating her just like Taylor, even though I think that Janie wanted that more than anything.

The thing to understand about my youngest is that she wants something more than anything at least five times a week. A real pony; a Build-a-Bear pony; a Build-A-Bear bear; a dollhouse; a video game; a Polaroid camera to take retro pictures; a new pair of shoes; a scooter she’ll probably never ride; and on and on the list of things she absolutely must have goes. Her father and I would have spoiled her tremendously if we had given her even a fraction of the things she said she wants more than anything.

The good news about this is she rarely hangs on to these longings and usually forgets long before the next birthday or gift-giving holiday she ever said she wanted such a thing. She moves on quickly from obsession to a new must-have compulsion, like a squirrel in a peanut factory.

“Wow, I never thought I’d see your youngest daughter naked up close like that, Ma’am,” Mort said once we were alone in the kitchen.

He implied he may have peeped on her at one time or another. I didn’t make an issue of it.

“I forgot you were even up there with me,” I replied.

“I hear that all the time,” Mort chuckled in his self-deprecating manner.

“I didn’t see that coming.” I told him that I was shocked that Janie would want to be disciplined that way.

“Why? You’ve made it sound like this wonderfully attractive idea. It’s a panacea for Taylor’s angry, prideful, snotty, aggressive ways, and it teaches humility, patience, and being considerate for other people’s needs,” Mort observed.

“So you think that’s why she wants to do it?” I asked him while taking out a coffee mug but pouring a little wine in it. I often did that when I was stressed-out.

“I should know what teenage girls want?” Mort laughed at the thought he understood her, but added that she probably also saw it as glamourous. “She doesn’t see the hard work or the pain – she only sees the attention and accolades that Taylor gets for being a good girl.”

“Glamorous? Is that how you see submission?” I asked sipping my wine. “Did your sister not make it clear to you that your submission to her will involve humiliation, degradation, and verbal abuse?”

“Yes Ma’am, and I asked her what was the catch?” Mort chuckled at his own deadpan response as if it were a joke, before adding that he knew from watching me it was a two-sided coin. “Some of it is going to involve breaking down barriers; and, if it wasn’t unpleasant, it would be doing what you wanted to do anyway. I assure you, I don’t like paying retail or giving away my money on frivolity, and today I spent a lot more than I wanted to. But I think it taught me more than if I drank all the cum in that milk carton.”

I grinned at him and said he would need to try to find out.

“Hey, I don’t want to drink all your milk when we work so hard to top it off for you,” he chuckled. “Do you want to bring it with you so you can spit the cum into it when you finish sucking off the security guard and his friends, Ma’am?”

Mort’s question was so calm and casual, as if asking me what kind of sandwich I wanted at the nearby deli.

At that moment, the door opened and Hope walked in again. I thought she may have heard me and I almost spit out my wine.

“Wine in the coffee mug? My mom does the same thing,” Hope said. She apologized for not putting away the milk and picked up the half-glass she had sitting on the counter. “I am so thankful for your son Donny. He’s so gifted in physics and math. I don’t know what I would do without him. I really do apologize about earlier.”

“You have nothing to apologize for,” I said, smiling at her and feeling a little guilty I was letting her drink milk that had cum floating in it. The comment she made about it tasting familiar and the fact she looked so attractive made me believe this probably wasn’t her first taste.

“When my brother gawked at your daughter upstairs and said those comments about her... I’ll deal with him when I get home,” she promised.

“Oh, no need.” I shrugged that it was perfectly understandable.

“What was that all about anyway? I’ve noticed your other daughter has been acting strangely at school too. I don’t mean that in a bad way. I mean she seems to be smiling and actually nice lately.”

“Yeah, we’re trying to improve her attitude,” I admitted with a smirk.

“It must be in the milk, then?” Hope took a long sip of the milk – she was clearly joking.

“You never know, it may just be,” I chuckled back.