Chapter Eighty-Three

One Day You Shall Be Free At Last – Until then, keep shaking them titties

I had walked enough times between Glory Hill and Seminole to know that the way Ted was taking us wasn’t the one we normally took. I had also had enough torment and misfortune this past week than to think he was using a short-cut.

We snaked along several roads while it was still daylight with the boom-box belting out classic rock. Ted was having a grand time directing us which way to march while singing “Boom-shock-a-locka, boom-shock-a-locka, turn LOAFED.” when he wanted us to turn left onto the next street.

Ted mostly whipped our butts with his terrible fishing pole and told us to keep our knees high –but there were a few times he would offer commands like “Sluts, eyes LOAFED!” and all of us naturally turned our heads to the left to see a stunned old man in a house-coat watering his lawn. His jaw dropped in shocked amazement as we marched right past.

I was surprised when Ted suddenly ordered my brother to turn off the boom box that was blasting out his favorite tunes. I almost missed the loud music. Even though it was like a huge advertisement to come see the spectacle outside – the quiet, punctuated by angry yelling or laughter of strangers, was far worse.

Kids would run or ride their bicycles alongside of us until Ted finally scared them off or they came to the end of their street. The people of the Buckman tended to stick to certain streets they felt they belonged on and a lot of them were separated by ethnicity – Mexicans and black people.

Ted told us, “Be happy. I am taking you this way – introducing you to some new customers. You have soaked all the white ones. Beaners and darkies don’t have much use for the swimming pool – but they might tomorrow!”

We were turning on to a street that was obviously for black people. It was now obvious to me why they cut off the classic rock that was jamming on the stereo. Even the ever-present Boogey moved on rather than follow us down this street. He shouted something about “shaking your asses and loving every minute of it” before driving away.

I immediately saw two black guys in white wife-beater tank tops with their hands in their pockets watching our naked pony-show with big smiles on their face. They had black doo-rags on their heads and watched us with a mixture of “WTF?” and pleasant surprise.

That was until a heavy-set black woman came running out of her trailer brandishing a curtain rod. “Jerome, you better get your black-ass back in the god-damned house and stop watching these crazy, white women!” she shrieked.

When he told her to watch herself and ignored her she literally began beating him with the curtain rod. We didn’t stop or slow down but I don’t think the man won that fight, even though he was much bigger than she was.

There was an old wino sipping on a bottle of liquor in front of a mailbox. He was missing a lot of teeth as he looked up at us and smiled. “Praise Jesus, you done answered my prayers!” he mused.

His eyes were bright but he looked so old he could barely move from the spot he had been slumped in all day. He didn’t seemed surprised or shocked that six naked women and two naked men were marching in front of a golf-cart.

I smiled at him. I should have been humiliated and embarrassed but a lot of people had seen me naked at this point. I was pleased for the ones who just laughed and saw it as a funny spectacle. Compared to the other kind who made lewd remarks or yelled and even threw stuff at us – guys like him were a blessing. We’d be passing him and marching out of his life soon – so I thought I might as well wink and give him a smile.

“Whoa, ponies!! Take a break,” Ted stopped us right in front of the man’s trailer.

“Willy? Willy Johnson?” Ted asked with a look of recognition.

“Yes, I believe that tharr is Ted Gaylord,” Willy stood up and dusted himself off. He slurped his lips as he spoke as if trying to suck up the last bit of cheap wine from his last swallow and presented his hand to Ted.

“Willy, you sure have fallen a long ways since the last time I saw you!” Ted didn’t take Willy’s hand and it was fairly obvious as he let it linger extended in his direction.

“Just a temporary setback,” Willy promised. “Things will pick up at the car lot and we’ll be BACK in business – don’t you worry about that!”

“That car lot closed down over fifteen years ago, Willy,” Ted shielded his eyes from the setting sun and regarded the man with a look of pity on his face.

“I am just on a temporary hiatus, Ted,” Willy over-pronounced the word hiatus, adding, “I’ve got some very important bidness deals, and some promising financial backings for my operation- you want a job? You come to old Willy – remember, I did give you your first job, Ted Gaylord! Yes , I did!” he laughed.

“You sure did, Willy,” Ted was being patronizing but in a reassuring way. “Your financial deals wouldn’t happen to be a couple of scratcher tickets to win some money, would they?”

“Now Ted!” Willy was fully standing up now and looking us over like we were actually prized steeds as he feigned indignation at the mere suggestion. “I did win over thirty-five dollars the other day though on one of them.”

“You spent it on more scratchers and some cheap whiskey, did ya?” Ted chuckled.

“Investments! Ted, Investments!” Willy promised. “You remember I was the one who said to invest in Jacobi farm before anyone else. You remember I told you what would happen though?”

“Ted, we don’t have time for you two to catch up,” Odd-Jobs reminded him.

“Hey Willy, I’ve got places to go and people to be, so they are telling me we need to skedaddle now – you keep hanging in there!”

“Hey now, hey now,” Willy stalled them to stay longer “You can’t just walk up to old Willy with all these naked white women and not tell Willy what y’all are doing? What IS this shit, Ted?”

“Well, Willy,” Ted wasn’t ready to go just yet – especially for a chance to gloat with what appeared to be an old mentor of his. “It’s like this,” he stepped off the golf cart.

“Oh shit, here we go again,” Odd-Jobs sighed.

“Just be a minute, O.J.” Ted promised.

“This here is my wife Crystal,” Ted introduced Willy to her.

“Pleasure to meet you, I’d shake your hand but you seem to be a little uh..tied up,” Willy made an obvious joke about our hands being bound to the wood slung across our back.

“You can shake one of her titties if you’d like then,” Ted offered and Willy didn’t hesitate to grab one of my Aunt’s fake tits and give it a shake.

“I am not really his wife, I am more like a sex-slave and live in girlfriend, Sir; but it sure is a pleasure to meet you,” Crystal was back to her sassy self but she graciously humored the dirty old black man.

“Crystal Danville, I’ve heard all about you – yesssir – you sure do have a fine set of perfect titties on you. I sure wish I knew you back in the day. Yes sir. You should have come around the car lot with all your little friends. Old Willy would take you for a ride – yes I would.”

Next Ted brought him to Daisy who was standing beside Crystal, “This here is my sister Daisy Gaylord – you remember her don’t you?”

“Jesus Christ, you sure have grown, but mmmhmmm, red beans and rice did you right honey child! You were always wearing those TIGHT denim shorts back in the day – Whoot there it is! Look at Whoot-there-it-is” Willy seemed excited to see her and grabbed one of her big tits to shake it without asking, “Well damn, you sure are a little milky- aren’t you!”

“Yes Sir,” Daisy answered him very bitterly and without any other acknowledgement.

“Don’t mind her,” Ted explained. “Her ass is just chapped because she got in trouble for stealing from us. This one here is Cricket and...” Ted was going to pass Cricket with simply that introduction all together, but Willy stopped him.

“Well, aren’t you a pretty one,” Willy grinned and touched one of her saggy boobs. “I like egg-drop titties like this –very natural!”

“Thank you Sir!” Cricket purred with pleasure over the compliment.

“I think I know you from somewhere, don’t I?” Willy tried to recall but was obviously having trouble.

“I would think so, Sir! Gee whiz, it was only two months ago. You fucked me for a frozen burrito and a pack of cigarettes.”

“That was you? Down behind the Pump-N-Stump Dumpster?” Willy managed the complicated alliteration of the sentence perfectly revealing a nearly toothless grin. “Your brother was pretending to be Stuperman or something, wasn’t he?”

“Superman, Sir! My brother has a speech impediment,” she explained rather plainly “He is special.”

“We are all special in god’s eyes,” the old man smiled and moved on to Delilah without needing Ted to introduce him.

“Well aren’t you just as fresh as a hickory blossom? You make Willy’s dick hard, did you know that? What’s your name, sweetness?”

“I can see that, Sir,” I could see it too – Willy’s dick was hard and his pants were heavily stained from cum and piss. “I am Delilah Waxerman, Sir – but most people call me Jezebel.”

“Waxerman?” Willy staggered slightly as if he had vertigo and might fall over “I used to date a pretty Vicki Waxerman, but that was long time ago – it was pretty taboo back then. She was a nasty one that one,” Willy chuckled. “Any relation?”

“That would be my Aunt sir, and we are both nasty,” Delilah assured him, “naughty and nasty.”

“She was a preacher’s daughter though. He found out I was with her and I never saw her since. You tell her old Willy says hello, won’t you now?” Willy shook her boob goodbye and stepped behind her to Savannah.

“I’d know this pretty petunia anywhere,” Willy grabbed her boobs in his hands and gave them a loving squeeze.

“Hey Willy, Sir,” Savannah’s voice indicated she knew he would recognize her and was just waiting for him to grab her tits so she could get it over with.

“I remember you used to get old Willy to buy you beer out behind Pump-N-Stump,” Willy looked her up and down, “and you sure did fill out. You were just a bean pole back then! All blonde hair, giggles, knobby knees and elbows!”

“Yep, I sure did Willy, Sir,” Savannah endured his leers with a patient but obviously unenthusiastic grimace.

“You need to grow you some hair on that pussy though,” Willy smiled and looked around as if he was telling a joke and wanted to see who was nearby “You look like a giant, sexy, baby!”

Willy’s procession came to me next and he looked me up and down with a look of admiration. “Now who is this one Teddy?”

“That is my niece,” Ted introduced me as, “A rich bitch from Cherry Lawn named Ellen.”

“Aren’t you going to shake my tits like all the others, Sir?” I asked him. I wasn’t excited to let him put his grubby hands on me, but I assumed it was a rite of passage and I might as well get it over with so he could move on to the two guys behind me and we could leave. We were getting all sorts of stares and looks in this neighborhood and none of it looked positive – in fact, I thought we might even be in danger as people silently talked amongst themselves and stared at us.

“No, I figure maybe you could give old Willy a loan instead?” he promised I would double my investment in six month.

“That’s okay sir, I am trying to save up to move out of here,” I answered truthfully.

“Well, in that case,” Willy licked his chapped lips and sucked them while grabbing my tits as if he was entitled to one free grab.

He clearly didn’t want to see Lloyd or Ryan when he realized they were guys “Now Ted, It begs the question – can I have one of these white women of yours?”

“No Willy, you can’t,” Ted laughed at the obvious way Willy had asked him.

“Why not? You have so many!” Willy had a kind of practiced comic timing in how he talked that made you want to laugh along with him.

“Willy, we really have to go,” Ted said goodbye to his friend and started to get back on the golf-cart.

“Ted, Ted, let me holler at’cha, let me holler! Just a minute,” Willy did have the mark of a good salesman because he wasn’t finished trying to get something out of Ted. “Could I just sniff this one’s pussy? Just to smell the smell of a good, tight, young pussy?” I didn’t expect something so vulgar coming from a man who seemed so sweet and funny.

“Sure, Willy, but just until I get loaded up on the cart here,” Ted chuckled.

I couldn’t see him because I was facing forward but I prayed it wouldn’t be me. “Don’t let it be me, don’t let it be me.”

I opened my eyes and there was Willy’s toothless countenance staring up at me. “Don’t act so surprised, Darling! You have a pretty pussy, let me just have a little sniff of what you have between your legs,” Willy tried to sweet talk me. He became very lucid as he inhaled my crotch as if the smell of my so often-abused pussy was enough to drive all his troubles away and it was pure spring mountain air.

“I LOVE the smell of young pussy in the mornin’,” Willy proclaimed, like my pink slit was a prize rose bush adding an enthusiastic, “and afternoon, night and the next mornin’ too!”

I was half-mortified to have this old, dirty bum smelling my bared pussy and half embarrassed for him that he was making such a big deal about bending down and taking a long look.

He breathed me in heavily and with a surprisingly erudite and cultured expression on his face commented with a wry expression, “Enchanting.”

I didn’t have much choice in the matter – whether he used persuasion and sweet talk or not, I was going to have to share my most intimate spot with whoever Ted wanted to let sniff it. I raised one leg and he bent down and breathed me in, “That is nice, oh that there is nice, right there.”

“Why you got one of those cords between your legs? Feel good like that do it?” Willy asked as he sucked the air from out of my pussy with his mouth – without putting his lips directly on my lips.

“No sir, actually it chafes and rubs me – it is very uncomfortable,” I admitted truthfully. The cords that wrapped between my legs were clinching my clit while very much making me constantly aware of my nakedness and the discomfort of having my body tied to the others.

“Ted!” Willy seemed like he was chewing something in his mouth as he spoke, “These girls don’t want all these ropes between their legs. It don’t feel good, take them off right now.”

“Tell him what you did to deserve this, Ellen,” Ted wanted me to grift one last time and I had told this story a number of times – so it was fairly easy to embellish upon the theme. I was surprised how easy it was to lie and almost believe it myself.

“We are all here because we are liars, manipulators and lazy. We spent all our rent and electric money on expensive things we didn’t need, and Daisy even stole from the rest of us – so Ted is teaching us a lesson in being humble, sir,” at least I thought I was good at lying.

He looked at me and quite seriously shook his head not understanding “Hell, I was spending my babies milk money on booze before your momma was probably born – that ain’t no reason to fret.”

“I can’t speak for nobody else but me,” Delilah offered when Willy seemed unconvinced of our motives. “I am a debauched girl whose sinful ways have led men astray from the path of salvation and my behavior is indecent. My step daddy left me here to expose me for what I am. It is a simple tenet of Christian morality that sin must be expiated through penance. All that was touched by sin must be purified through penitence. Following this principle the impure body contributed to sin and therefore must be punished. The impure thoughts that drove them must be cleansed through submission and those who are cruel tormentors to us receive absolution for their punishments, offer us to earn the forgiveness and learn the lessons of the truly wicked female.”

Willy seemed much more convinced and chuckled “You are definitely Vicki Waxerman’s kin folk. She always did use a word worth about three-fitty when a nickel would do.” He shook his head in disbelief, “White people these days do the craziest things but don’t stop on my account – I just like watching those sexy white asses.”

It was at that point I heard the familiar sound of a screen door slamming and then the voice of an elderly black woman, “Oh no, nuh-uh, honey child! What kind of monkey bidness do we have hurr on my front door step, Willy Johnson?”

“It’s just Teddy and Daisy Gaylord and a whole mess of naked white women, Mrs. Johnson,” Willy’s tone reminded me of a child who wanted to sound innocent of all wrong doing when caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

Mrs. Johnson stood about 5 feet tall and dressed in a simple pink paisley house coat with flip flops, but she cast a very tall and imposing shadow because even Odd-Jobs seemed unwilling to upset her.

“Hello Mrs. Johnson,” Odd-Jobs tipped his hat to the woman respectfully.

“Oliver Orenthal Jacobi,” I hadn’t heard anyone dare to call Odd-Jobs by his first name, but she could. “I should have known you would be messed up in a despicable operation like this.” She shook her head slowly back and forth in disgust. “You know I have grand-babies in that trailer hurr and you all walking around with your bidness hanging out in broad daylight?”

“I totally understand, Ma’am,” Odd-Jobs tone remained respectful although slightly patronizing, “I told Ted here that we should just dress them in bikinis instead of giving it all away, but he seemed to feel we should march the girls through the park naked to teach them a lesson and drum up some business. The girls get people interested this way and they come see them at the Seminole Community Center pool.”

“Bidness?” Mrs. Johnson seemed to suddenly pivot from disgust to interest at the mention of money, “What bidness you doing? Doh’ to Doh’ Ho’ Sho?”

Odd-Jobs chuckled and told her that might be an idea.

“How much y’all make today?” Mrs. Johnson clarified skeptically while her eyes narrowed suspiciously, “and don’t add in promises to pay and I.O.Us, neever!”

“Over ten thousand dollars, Ma’am,” Odd-Jobs made no secret to her of what we were doing and that surprised me as well.

I could tell from Mrs. Johnson’s silence that she may have been thinking of something disparaging to say, but apparently that sum impressed her and she was no longer upset. “You all selling a little skin on the weekend – it takes skin to win,” she finally commented supportively. Then she grabbed Willy by the ear and told him, “Come on.”

“I just want to say bye-bye to Teddy here and maybe talk to him about investing some of that money – I could double that in a day! You need to come holler at your boy Willy!” he promised Ted.

“Willy Johnson!” she demanded “You want to see a titty – then you can see one inside this trailer.”

She yanked down the elastic band of her house coat from around her neck to reveal a dark brown breast that sagged almost identically to Crickets chest. Her nipple was as red as a cherry on top of the black skin. Mrs. Johnson smiled at me knowingly when she flashed her husband briefly before pulling her top back up and insisting Willy, “Come on, I’ve got collards, ox-tail, and red velvet cake for supper and you don’t need to be messing around here watching these pretty little things. You ain’t got no money – just talk.”

She did turn to Ted and ask, “You have room for another girl up there? I got a niece who is looking for work!”

“I’m actually thinking about adding some more girls – if they don’t work out, I will let you know.” Odd-Jobs promised.

“Oliver Orenthal Jacobi, for as long as I be knowing you,” Mrs. Johnson had a deeply southern accent, “you be promising you will let me know. I am fifty-seven years old and...”

“Sixty-seven years old,” Willy corrected her with a smile and she smoothly removed one flip flop while continuing to talk and hit him with it “upside his fool head”.

“Fifty seven years old,” she insisted, “and you ain’t never let me know – now if you ain’t start letting me know soon, then when you gonna do it?”

“I tried to get you to come work for me at the farm when it was running all those years ago!” Odd-Jobs chuckled.

“I am a Christian woman and I wasn’t about to mess around with whatever shady shenanigans and goings on you had happening up there!” she declared.

“Then why you want your niece to come work for me, Mrs. Johnson?” Odd-Jobs laughed.

“She nasty,” there was something so dead-pan and yet honest about how Mrs. Johnson answered him that I laughed out loud. I was surprised I was the only one to utter a peep.

“That’s how I like ‘em,” Willy insisted, and for his trouble he was popped with his wife’s flip flop again. He seemed to be rather used to that and took it without complaint.

I had to wonder why they had hired Cricket but didn’t even consider Mrs. Johnson’s niece for a job. I suspected maybe they didn’t want a black girl in the group. I didn’t have time to give it a lot of thought.

The Johnsons’ stood out of the way and let Ted start up his golf cart for us to leave while Willy waved, “Remember in the immortal words of Doctor Martin Loofah Kang, One day, you will be free at last, free at last, good god ALMIGHTY – until then keep them titties shaking.”

I heard sassy Savannah quip, “Free? We can’t make no money that way!” but if Willy heard her – he ignored my cousin’s joke.

Willy hollered as we started marching “Let Freedom Rang! Don’t default on your promissory note White America – bring out those white girls and let them play! Oh lord, have mercy!”

“You better git your white asses off this street before darkness because y’all don’t belong on this road!” Mrs. Johnson’s warning was belligerent but tempered with concern. She repeated, “Some people got grand-babies running around, don’t need to see this mess neever! Y’all take care now and don’t catch cold running around with your asses hanging out.”

Ted waved to her and then motioned us to continue marching with his whip and began counting out cadence. He started singing as we strutted forward, “There she was just a-walkin' down the street,” I wasn’t sure what he expected to hear but after a slap across the back with his cane pole the others started answering him back.

“Singing Do-Wah diddy, diddy-dum, diddy doo!” I wasn’t sure what that was from but I pretended to sing along while we marched away from the old man who was shouting.

“She look good,” Ted sung out loudly in rhythm with our marching to the end of this street.

“She looked fine,” Crystal, Lloyd, Ryan and even Cricket sang loudest in response.

“And I nearly lost my mine!” Ted smiled as he sang the words, slightly mispronounced, “Before I knew it she was walkin' next to me - sangin'..”

“Do-Wah diddy, diddy-dum, diddy doo!” this time we were all in better harmony. It sounded like a fun song and it took my mind off the fact that there were at least a dozen black people staring at us like we were the devil themselves marching through their street.

“Holdin' my hand just as natural as can be!” Ted lost interest in singing shortly after that but I have to admit it was one of the more singular memorable moments of the long march home.