Chapter Forty-Two

42 – The Ultimate Chapter on Life, the Universe, and Everything

Or The Improbability of Driving Miss Daisy

“She felt that her whole life was some kind of dream and she sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.”

― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Ted was hustling us out of the trailer so quickly that I thought he was going to forget to let us get dressed.

He didn’t forget.

He chose not to let us.

“For a second nothing happened, and for another second nothing continued to happen,” my brother was standing with us and quoting some obscure movie or book reference while we were waiting for Ted and Daisy to get organized,.

I smiled at Conner and he smiled back at me. We would get through this together and his silent gaze assured me he needed my support as much as I needed his.

“Can you fuckers stop eyeballing each other? We have things to do and no fucking time!” Ted interrupted the moment. I wasn’t sure what was going on in Conner’s head, but I would be sure to try to talk to him today at the car wash. It felt good that he smiled at me though –like we were in this together and he was really on my side.

I didn’t want Daisy to take his 5% because it wasn’t just HIS money – it was OUR family’s money. He could have bought an IPAD or a Light saber or something the night before at the mall, but I knew he was putting aside his earnings for mom and dad, just like I was trying to do!

Ted led us outside completely naked without the butt plugs in our asses. “This cannot be happening? Mom, aren’t you going to say SOMETHING?” Savannah demanded and pointed out the bindings around our boobs were REALLY uncomfortable.

Crystal nodded that she would. “You have to respect your step-father,” Crystal’s words weren’t what Savannah meant by saying something, “if he thinks we don’t need clothes then we don’t. You will have to get used to being uncomfortable. You used your boobs as two tickets to any place you want to go and anything you want and now they are being used against you – tough titty until Sunday, Ma’am!”

Daisy walked past my Aunt and snorted, “You surprised me by being such a good sport about losing the bet with Ted. I think it’s for the best you let him take control of you and make decisions for your kids’ welfare as well. I already love your attitude change this morning – no more sass from your ASS!” she slapped my aunt’s butt once out of the trailer.

“Yes Mistress, thank you!” Crystal accepted the slap with only the tiniest flinch.

“Ooh la-la!” Daisy smiled, “Mistress? I like that.”

I SOO wanted to slap the condescending look right off Daisy’s face. We had to put up with it at the pool from men and women who punished us – but she had such a look of entitlement and self-satisfaction I would have agreed to bitch training for another full week if I could just smack the snot out of her.

I’ve never hurt a fly and I used to be the girl that avoided stepping on a crack so I didn’t break my mother’s back – yet now I was wishing to back-up a dump-truck full of cow manure and just drop it on this woman’s head. The Buckman had really changed my attitude quickly.

Savannah and Lloyd could not believe their Mom was taking Daisy’s crap so willingly and to be honest – neither could I!

“Well you are one of the bosses of me now, Mistress!” Crystal sounded excited her sister-in-law would be making decisions for her – this was so not what I expected.

Daisy rubbed my Aunt’s nose in it a little more before she said goodbye to her kids through the screen door. Bill told her he would watch them. She ignored him and told them to ‘mind Maw-Maw’ and followed us out the door with an impish grin on her face – I think because she knew they probably wouldn’t.

“I am free,” she laughed, saying how it was such a burden to be a good mom and take care of those kids “But you wouldn’t know what that’s like would you, Crystal?”

“No, ma’am” Crystal didn’t blink or grit her teeth. She dutifully replied as we stood in the morning air completely naked in the tiny yard while the dog’s barked.

“Conner did you remember to feed Zeus and Ares?” Ted asked as my brother carried out the stereo and things Ted wanted to bring with us to the pool. We would have helped but our hands were still bound behind our back and we also had food caked on our faces.

“You didn’t tell me to do it, Sir,” Conner answered defensively but volunteered to come back and get them fed later today.

“I shouldn’t have to tell you to keep up on things,” Ted was impatiently, “That’s why I need my sister in this,” He didn’t mention that his own sister had not written on Lloyd’s ass as she had been instructed to do twice.

“Whoa,” O.J. was by himself in the cart “I don’t want your sister down at the car wash – no offense Daisy, but this isn’t a Gaylord production.”

Ted initially demanded that his sister help out.

“No,” O.J replied without hesitation.

Ted then asked if his sister could help out and we’d work out a deal to get her compensated.

“No,” O.J replied holding firm to his original position.

Ted came closer and pleaded “Look – I promised her and her kids they could try it out today – if they do not work out then they have to go.”

“No,” O.J stubbornly refused to consider it. I was actually liking this; and the way Daisy’s face looked after each rejection was increasingly sad and that delighted me.

“We aren’t altering our deal,” O.J. insisted that we get going now.

“I am altering our deal,” Conner imitated the booming voice of a breathless Darth Vader, “pray I don’t alter it any further.”

“The kid will give up his money,” Ted flicked his thumb over his shoulder at Conner, adding skeptically that he really would, “Or I will give up half of mine.”

O.J. relented and told Ted he would discuss it on the way to the pool. He told Ted, Daisy, and Conner to get in the cart and smiled at us, “There isn’t enough room for you in the cart today – you girls are going to get a little exercise this morning.”

He removed four long, black, thick, rubber bungee cords from the back of the cart and attached them to our collars.

Savannah was about to say “You cannot be fucking serious” when O.J started up the cart and started rolling forward – leaving us no choice but to briskly jog behind the cart.

“We are doing a little road-work this morning,” he yelled over his shoulder at us, “I would have you wave at your adoring fans but you are a little tied up this morning I can see.”

We didn’t have on a stitch of clothing, as we began our morning jog through the Buckman, other than the collars with the little plastic dicks and butts dangling around our necks.

“Oh my god this is crazy,” I kept repeating to myself. “What am I doing here? I am stark naked and running through a trailer park with three other naked people? Oh my god!!”

A week ago I was caught walking through the trailer park in just a bra and panties and thought I would nearly die from embarrassment. I was now completely naked with my boobs bouncing, my butt jiggling and my body completely exposed – and I would be SO thankful for just a bra and panties.

I would gladly have got down on my hands and knees and thank O.J. for them – I am sure he would have made me do it anyway!

The first person to see us was an older man taking his trash out and instead of freaking out or calling the law he yelled, “Yay – streakers! It’s about fucking time!” then he danced a little jig and sang “Boogity Boogity – oh yes, they call them the streak!”

I smiled at him as we jogged slowly passed – what else could I do? He watched my tits and ass bounce with a delighted grin, until his wife yelled for him to come back inside.

Boogie’s van was on us by the time we made it down Glory Hill Street. “I overslept!” he apologized from his van that he missed a few hundred yards of our jog. O.J. didn’t acknowledge his horn or yelling, but he kept looking over his shoulder and smiling and winking.

Boogie was normally delighted to see us come to and from the pool and always managed to be there when we did. I think today he was nearing sensory overload as he followed the four of us jogging nude, as if this were perfectly acceptable. His custom-painted conversion van following us honking, only added to the spectacle and made us seem like a small parade.

We were running slow enough that none of us were out of breath and we were able to talk.

“What the fuck is wrong with you this morning,” Savannah asked her mother. We were all wondering the same thing.

“Nothing Ma’am,” Crystal replied submissively – even though she didn’t have to call her daughter Ma’am according to any of the rules.

“You seem like one of the fucking pod-people,” Savannah observed and asked, “Did he roofie you or something? I know Ted can’t fuck you THAT silly.”

“Ted and I had a talk last night and he decided it was best if I were to remain in training, Ma’am,” My Aunt spoke of Ted with a deep reverence as if he were the wisest man on Earth.

“I have been a life-long bitch who is stubborn, lazy, vain and selfish and I want to set a good example for you both,” She explained “submitting to my man and being as sexy as I can for him, and working hard to please him the way a good woman would do” Crystal sounded like she was in a dream on another world – a slutty world.

“You cannot bullshit a bullshitter,” Savannah demanded this could not be real. I was shocked that my Aunt wanted to turn her life around. Crystal pretending to be something for money was no surprise but doing this just to be a good person and role model? I couldn’t buy it. I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt but I was skeptical – where did my Aunt go and who was this new woman that took her place?

“I am not bullshitting, Ma’am,” Crystal answered without the slightest trace of sarcasm.

“Yes, you fucking ARE!” Savannah nudged Lloyd to agree with her “Lloyd - tell her to stop lying!”

Ted was grinning and looking over his shoulder at us, “More flapping those tits and asses and less flapping those gums, ladies! This little fun-run is to do more than work off those calories and keep you looking good! It’s to show you off and generate some early morning business!”

“Yes Master,” Crystal obediently answered Ted.

Savannah shook her head in disbelief but none of us had any choice but to run behind the golf-cart as it putt-putted its way through the long, narrow, open streets of the Buckman.

I was thankful when we had to do twists and turns down the curvy streets after a few early morning honks and cheers.

Crystal nodded at them and put her chin up as if running naked with her hands tied behind her back was her sole purpose in life.

“There is Kung-Fu Dave,” Ted pointed out the local would-be trailer park super-hero and his sister and asked O.J. if he would swerve to hit him. Odd-Jobs laughed and called him a ‘useful idiot’ and only waved at him.

“Ted, Ted!” Kung-Fu Dave tried to get Ted’s attention, by hollering his name as if Ted would pay attention to him but just hadn’t heard or seen him standing in his green cape out by the street. He followed us with his sister jogging right next to us at our pace, asking him to reconsider his offer from the night before and join forces with him.

“She can wash the cars and be a good little bitch!” was the next to last thing I heard him say, as both he and his sister started huffing and puffing and bending over to catch their breath after thirty or so paces. “We’ve got to quit smoking,” was the very last thing I heard him say as we left him behind.

“Some fucking Superhero, huh?” Savannah offered sarcastically to the four of us, but she was obviously trying to get a comment from her mother. “He couldn’t save his own ass at a butt-fucking contest.”

They clearly had to see we were NAKED and being hustled through the trailer park and yet his sister still wanted to participate? She stood there with her mouth half-hanging open with a stupid look on her face but she had to know she’d have to do this too? She didn’t care? Was she just greedy or an idiot? – both.

“He seems cute, Ma’am,” Crystal answered submissively “I will get punished for talking to you if Ted finds out I am disobedient, but I’d let Kung-Fu Dave butt-fuck me if Ted told me to do it.”

I swallowed at the mental image of that geeky guy banging my sexy Aunt and her allowing it without any say in the matter, because Ted told her to.

Savannah was treating this run like a dare of sorts. She had a tenacious look on her face that she was going to do whatever her mom would do.

Lloyd had a goofy expression on his face like he was quietly finding this thing totally hilarious. His muscled calves and back flexing each time he took a long stride and his dick flopping between his legs as he kept time with us.

My Aunt was running with her chin up, tits out, shoulders back as if she were proud of herself and excited to let the entire trailer park have a look at her naked body.

I could barely look up because every time I did – I saw some new person staring at us and I wanted desperately to cover myself but my hands were still bound behind my back. I had no choice – run straight ahead and follow the cart.

“The three ups,” O.J. reminded us from the driver’s seat of his cart “Show up, Keep up and shut up!”

The four of us were in much better shape. Crystal kept pace with the rest of us and we jogged in time with the cart’s consistent speed. O.J. would periodically offer some advice about wiggling our asses more or running with our knees up and trying to keep the same cadence with each other.

Crystal tried to do everything he said even if the rest of us were incapable or unwilling to run at the same pace. I day-dreamed we were a pony-cart and had been harnessed up in tandem with one another to pull the cart instead of running behind it – two by two.

A fine coat of sweat was glistening off my Aunt’s body and she didn’t complain or huff once and we were already half-way to the pool. I kind of missed her wisecracks because the humor helped me to deal with the impossible situation. Savannah would occasionally complain but her and her mother going back and forth made it kind of funny and bearable.

“I wonder if Ted is going to make us wash cars in the nude today?” I thought out loud. “I thought O.J. told him it was better if we had a little something on and they had something left to reveal?”

“Ted will tell you when you need to know, Ma’am” Crystal answered my question. “I am anxious to return my butt plug to my ass and wish he had bought a larger one because I have such a big, nasty, asshole to fill.”

There was a trace of sarcasm in Crystal’s voice this time – like when she just pretended to be submissive with an element of subtle defiance that was almost undetectable.

“You are fucking putting me on?” Savannah KNEW her mother was playing a practical joke on us and demanded she let her in on it.

“No Ma’am,” Crystal matched pace step for step with her daughter, “I think it’s good discipline. I am a three-hole slut for Ted. He taught me that I need to be less stingy with my booty and, because it is the most sensitive part of my body, it can be used to motivate me more than even my expensive, angry-tits.”

O.J. reminded us to keep high-stepping as we ran, “Knees UP bitches!”

Crystal answered him, “Yes Master,” with a broad smile and lifted her legs higher as she ran – which caused her ass and tits to jiggle more. She paid absolutely no attention to the people who saw us running and their cat-calls, jeers, or whistles, other than to smile at them.

O.J. was presumably talking to Ted about Daisy’s inclusion and didn’t seem overly fond of the idea yet. I couldn’t hear him, but I could tell from Daisy’s face that she wasn’t too happy. She was sitting in the back seat and she would occasionally tug our bungee cords to jerk us forward out of synch with the others out of meanness. Crystal smiled back at her and accepted every cruelty with the grace of a good party-host who didn’t mind that you just accidentally spilled wine on their white carpet.

Savannah stopped asking her mom if she was serious during the run but continued to make wise-cracks for Lloyd and I to enjoy. “I wish I could scratch my ass,” she jokingly asked Lloyd if he would run backwards and bend his knees enough. “The itch is right on the bottom of my left ass cheek!”

She would make sassy jokes to some of the stunned people who were at the mail box and saw us running in front of Boogie’s van. “Pick your jaw off the ground, Gramma,” she laughed at one old lady “Ain’t you never heard of jogging before?”

Her humor made this entire embarrassing run so much easier and I wished Crystal would snap out of the submissive fog that seemed to cloud her good judgment. She had become a Stepford Wife, who obediently thought her man was always right and her place was to do whatever he told her.

I wondered if Crystal’s attitude wasn’t for the best. I had time to think and thinking about someone else would sometimes be better than reminding myself that I am completely naked without a stitch of clothing, with my hands tied behind my back and willingly jogging behind a golf-cart in front of hundreds of trailers. If my parents came home right now and saw me – I would literally have no explanation of any kind to offer for what I was doing.

Aunt Crystal was all the things she had said and more – vindictive, lazy, selfish, vain. She hadn’t been allowed to be those things while she was under Ted’s thumb and she was making money for the house. My Aunt had to submit to Ted’s instruction according to the terms of the bet and she might as well embrace them – if she has to do them anyway.

I had been influenced by her and Savannah to be abrasive and sassy while doing the discipline. We would comply, but on our own terms and with a little bit of sarcasm, but now I questioned if Crystal’s new cooperative attitude wasn’t the right attitude to have anyway.

I had at times embraced it. When the stakes were high on the first day, when Junior made us spank each other, I talked as nasty and submissively as I could. I absorbed that punishment at the bathroom for losing my clothes, only to find out the guys were just testing my willingness to accept it at the end.

“If you do not tell me you are joking right now,” Savannah made a last ditch attempt to get her mother to come clean with her on what kind of grift she was playing, threatening, “then I am going to haul ass back to the trailer as soon as they untie me.”

“MASTER!” Crystal yelled to get Ted and O.J.’s attention, “I just want to inform you that my slutty, little daughter wants to misbehave and shirk her education. She says as soon as you untie us she’ll run for the trailer.”

Wow – My Aunt told on Savannah. Savannah’s face went pale and she looked like she was in shock. The two of them had always been ‘partners in crime’ since Savannah was really little. They had told me about how they scammed guys into thinking they were her dad so she could get extra child support. “If you pay me $200 a month, I won’t take you to court!” She would tell the guy to give it to her under the table and Savannah would make him feel guilty with a big hug and shout “DADDY!!”

They would get free lunch at restaurants, work grifts on returns in stores to return items they had already worn for more than they were worth once the sale was over. This betrayal was entirely new to Savannah; and she looked as stunned and confused as one of the old ladies who saw us running by in the nude behind a golf-cart.

The entire humiliating ordeal was almost over – and then our DAY of humiliation could begin – wow, it just dawned on me that the run to the pool had started things off with such an explosively, grueling, and naked experience – I could only imagine what our day was going to be like.

They had run us here just to generate buzz. This spectacle was designed to get people talking about us so they would come see us at the pool. I realized that I would probably have to run home this way and back every day until Sunday and it was only Thursday now!!

Ted and O.J. smiled as they rode in the cart. They didn’t have a trace of remorse about parading us through the park completely naked and no one was likely to call the police and tell them we were flashing. I would need to learn to accept that this is just how it is going to be!

“Yah, Mush!” O.J. laughed like Santa-Claus in his sleigh as we neared the Buckman Recreation Center on Seminole.

“On Donger, On Dicks-In, On Titty Dancer, and ..” Ted tried to play along shouting what Santa-Claus might call his dirty reindeer, but he couldn’t think of another name.

“Clits-in, Sir?” Crystal offered helpfully and moved her head in my direction once we stopped. She had her hands bound behind her back or else she probably would have pointed to me. She obviously meant I had ‘chicken lips’ and my clit disappeared inside my slit.

She stood there with her chest heaving as she controlled her breathing and rested once the cart stopped.

“Don’t try to be helpful, bitch” Ted dismissed my Aunt’s suggestion and then turned around “I mean BE helpful, but don’t – you know what I mean!”

“Yes Master,” Crystal answered him as pliant and servile as I could imagine anyone being, “If I need to know what you mean – I am sure you will tell me.”

“Damn right Skippy,” Ted agreed and then hopped out to survey his new accommodations.

“It took all night but we got it up,” O.J. said of the small stand he built next to the sidewalk.

“That is what she said!” Ted answered jokingly but O.J. wasn’t amused.

O.J. showed us his latest addition to the pool area. It was only about 9:30 a.m., so there was almost no one at the pool at this time of the morning; but there was a steady stream of traffic of people who actually worked jobs. In a trailer park of well over a thousand trailers – one might have expected a lot more cars; but suffice to say it was brisk and they noticed us and honked, but no one stayed. They had to get to their work.

The first thing we noticed was a small portable booth, about the size of a horse pulled behind a truck, that had been painted in bright colors.

“We got this from Senior’s Amusement park and refurbished it,” O.J. was very proud of his handiwork. He pressed a button, turned a key and then pulled hard on a handle and the side opened up to reveal the booth inside.

It instantly reminded me of something designed to house carnies at the county-fair selling 3 darts for a dollar to pop balloons. It was painted garishly like a circus fun-house and attracted attention, and once opened it was perfect for 2-3 people to sit inside in the shade.

“Does it have air-conditioning?” Daisy asked skeptically.

O.J. ignored her question and showed us what it did have. It was painted up as a KISSING BOOTH with the words ‘Hugs are free (first one) – Kisses 5 dollars – everything else negotiable’.

There was a sign under that ‘Kisses 4 dollars before 10 a.m and after 4 P.M’.

The signs reminded me of a food cart with a menu of all the items you could order, along with paintings of some of the more savory or delicious features you’d find at the county fair – deep fried Oreos and Italian sausage, except in this case it was our misery and humiliation.

There was an official looking sign on the wall with prices of other things as well.

Feed The Bitches – Feeding Time 11:30 a.m to Noon: Five dollars donation:

--1 Hot dog (with mayo or mustard 1 dollar extra) – girls supply the buns!

-Carrot (an orange cock painted like a carrot pointing erect next to it)

-Handful of grapes (and a painting of two grapes hanging like balls)

-Banana

Milk shot- 1 dollar!

“Tea Service” 10 dollars with Polaroid.

I wasn’t familiar with Tea-Service, but I had a feeling it wasn’t going to involve sitting down with china and having a tea-party. I did feel a bit like Alice in Wonderland and that everyone here might be mad.

If Daisy and Ted where the Queen and King of Hearts, then O.J. was certainly the Mad Hatter who organized the entire tea party.

There was another sign that had prices to “Sit in the V.I.P” and to rent super-soakers alongside of three orange nerf-style water-rifles that seemed designed to obliterate an opponent and not just drench them in a powerful spray of water.

Make my niece show you what she does at home with the garden hose for five dollars” – 5 dollars

Painted on a side wall on a blue background in red paint, next to a mural that looked unsurprisingly exactly like a sexy Savannah. Her painting was a sexy blonde in a skimpy rebel flag thong with her ass facing out and looking over her shoulder while she touched her finger to her mouth demurely.

“Damn!” Savannah seemed impressed as she stared up at a 10 foot tall representation of herself. “My eyes are really that fucking blue?” she was fascinated. “The eyes seem to follow me no matter which way I go!”

On the far right side was room for more rules, and there were astral rockets and moons painted on the side like it was taken right from the midway, and somewhere a Himalaya or Graviton were missing the base-boards that lead up to the ride!

The rules and the garish cart made things look almost professional and like this is how it was supposed to be. I have to admit I was worried about all of these rules and they confused me. I think they weren’t intended to explain everything as much as they were to interest someone into just coming over and taking a look.

More Rules were listed:

10 dollars a pull from the “Tub o’ learning” next to a painting of a clear plastic tub with scraps of paper in it.

Body Writing 5-10 dollars depending on body part and words. Along with a naked ass and the word’s “World’s Greatest Mom” JUST like was painted on my Aunt- complete with the red O.

ABSOLUTELY NO CELL PHONE PICTURES – unless in the V.I.P section and then the words “Buy a polaroid it will last longer” 10$ with Tea and 5 dollars without! (group shots extra!) next to a floating Kodak polaroid camera that seemed to be trapped in celestial space between Jupiter and a rocket ship.

There was a sign on the back of the cart facing the pool that read:

“POOL RULES”

1. No pee in our pool!

2. No poop in our pool!

3. No diapers/babies in our pool!

4. No horseplay!

5. No rough-housing

6. Swim at own risk – no lifeguard

7. Do not stick dick in water jets

8. Do not pee in our pool (AGAIN!)

9. Keep splashing to a minimum

10. Know how to swim BEFORE you get in.
    
    
    

“The pool officially opens today so this is going to work out good,” O.J. mused.

“If anyone bothers to read rules,” Ted laughed.

“Or follow them,” Savannah added – but was largely ignored.

“I might have to scare them into thinking they will end up out here under your supervision,” O.J. joked back at Ted.

“Hell, I got people wanting to come out and be under MY rule voluntarily,” Ted puffed up his chest and bragged. “I was handed the keys to the kingdom, multi-million dollar deals, endorsements. Everyone wanted a piece of my shit!” he exaggerated saying he was going to start printing up T-shirts if this “one deal with Julio goes through!”

“They want to be part of it for money though,” O.J. shook his head laughing. “I may have to bring back trailer park jail!” I wasn’t sure what that was a reference to and he changed the subject. “I like rule number seven. If I had a dollar for every kid that got his dick stuck in the pool-jets I’d be a rich man.”

“You ARE a rich man,” Ted assured Odd-Jobs. O.J. wore plain work clothes and rode around in a golf-cart, but the story I heard the night before was that he was well-off and his job as a maintenance man was more of a front.

O.J. squinted with mirth twinkling in his eyes, “I wouldn’t mind being a might bit richer though. I may start charging five-dollars every time I need to come unstick somebody who stuck their dick somewhere they shouldn’t.”

“Hell,” Ted laughed at the metaphor, “That could be just about every guy in the trailer park in an unhappy marriage.”

The guys laughed at the idea there WERE happy marriages in the Buckman, but none of them ever suggested it was the men’s fault they were like that.

O.J. told my brother not to be too worried about losing out on the 5%. “I can probably use you digging ditches at least another day or so – that’s ten bucks an hour.” A pittance and really hard work compared to what he was doing for us at the pool.

My brother smiled and thanked him and said he was just glad to help. “You know this place could probably use a mini-golf,” he suggested.

“That’s another great idea,” O.J. replied but didn’t continue the conversation – turning instead to survey the rest of the booth.

In the very center of the cart there was a mural of all four of us with Ted’s floating head scolding us. The sign read “You bitches need discipline! Wash some cars”. My Aunt has big, fake tits, but her painting made her look like she was a porn star. She looked starry eyed as she drank the image in.

In the mural Lloyd was in the back behind his sister. He was lifting a beer and was dressed like a barbarian with ripped muscle popping out.

I had short black hair and my nose was stuck in the air like an elf princess. The painting made it look like I was about to complain about something, but I was sticking my rather cute looking ass out in order for it to be smacked. I had on a skimpy purple bikini and dollar signs in my eyes. There was a blinged out diamond necklace around my neck shaped like dollar signs. There was a tramp stamp painted on my back with elaborate roses and the words “$I LOVE CHERRY LAWN ESTATES$”.

It looked like “She thinks her butt don’t stinks” was painted in yellow and then lightly brushed over as if the painter decided against it – I guess I was grateful for that. I was not sure if he changed his mind because he spelled stinks with an extra S or just decided I didn’t deserve that level of debasement on this insane carnival-style booth.

Savannah’s tits and ass were perky and stuck out in the center of the mural. The painter gave her long feathered blonde hair like Farrah Fawcett in the 1970s. She was the Betty to my Veronica in this artistic version of us. We were both wearing big white roller-skates and the captions “MEALS ON WHEELS” was painted underneath us.

“Damned, you should have put more sparks flying out from under our skates,” Savannah laughed at the white sparks that had been painted under the skates – they looked like tiny stars.

I have to admit – it’s hard for a woman to say how that she is very attractive but after seeing the artists’ representation of myself I felt pretty hot! The art was exaggerating our features and made us look trashy, but it was also trashy-hot!

“Cum see the Ass Family” was the caption and it said our names next to our portrait:

FAT ASS – Crystal

SMART ASS – Savannah

DUMB ASS – Lloyd

KI$$ A$$ – Ellen

My caption replaced the S with dollar signs to imply I was some sort of rich-bitch.

For Ted it looked like the artist had painted over the word “Jack Ass” and Ted sniffed at it, but pretended it wasn’t there at all.

Right under that in big letters was the cost for car-washes.

10 dollar hand wash, 20 dollar full wax and 50 dollars Premium service. Tips gladly accepted!

“Help me train my bitches to not be bitches” captioned in white under that with a picture of Ted’s head in a top-hat with words “Ring Master” under it.

“Ring Master-baiter more like it,” Savannah chuckled under her breath.

“Sir!” Crystal turned her daughter in again for sassing, but Ted just grinned, “She is going to get hers! Top bitch – demonstrate this new comfy chair for the other bitches!” Ted undid her wrist cuffs and let her stretch her arms for a moment.

He tapped a padded wooden slab on the counter-top and Savannah defiantly laid face down flat on it, the way he told her to. The wood had been sanded, buffed, and laminated smooth; and the blue padding made it almost look comfortable.

Savannah’s head was cradled, so her neck was supported by cushion, but her head stuck out of the wooden plank. She put her arms on flat hinged boards that were attached to the main board with padded blue-wrist-cuffs. Ted secured her wrists to that and showed us how the wooden hinges could raise and lock so that her arms could be secured above her head or almost all the way down at her sides. He secured her legs using the same method and put her in spread eagle position on her stomach.

He strapped a belt around her waist and then pressed a button that released the hinge in the center of the main board so that Savannah was now essentially stood up but bent over.

“I can’t wait to make this pink little asshole talk to me today,” Ted pulled Savannah’s cheeks apart as if she were talking out of her butthole in time with his imitation of her saying “Oh Please Daddy Sir, don’t spank muh butt anymore!! I’ll be a good girl”

Savannah let him have his fun but I could almost SENSE her plotting sweet revenge on Ted for making her butt talk.

Ted produced a wooden paddle and spanked a prone and helpless Savannah three times hard on the ass for demonstration purposes before Savannah could say something snarky in response. “Try to wriggle free! I’ll let you have the whole day off if you can get out,” Ted offered with an amused expression.

Savannah started to wriggle “With pay though?” and Ted agreed. It looked like for a moment she was going to weasel her way to freedom, but the more she pulled the harder it became for her and she just couldn’t squeeze her wrists small enough to get out of the heavy straps.

They let Savannah struggle while they showed us the rest of the cart. Her mother seemed completely apathetic to what had just happened – even though this is the point where she would have been expected to make a humorous comment.

“We have three of these,” O.J. pointed to another red one just like the one Savannah was in. He showed us the third orange wooden spanking seat that had been designed with similar purpose. “They work basically the same, but the orange one is a little more interesting.”

Is there no end to the resourcefulness of perverted men when money and sex are involved? They built this in one night? I was both frightened for what this all meant to me and impressed they were capable of setting it up.

Ted struck me as an ‘idea man’ – a guy who does a lot of talking and never follows through. He had been with us all night – this was the work of someone else.

He didn’t explain how it was ‘interesting’ but I knew it was not going to be pleasant. O.J. then showed us his favorite chair. “This used to be in an acupuncturists tent at the theme park but not enough people were into that new-age hippy shit,” he smirked.

“Ooh I know what this is,” Daisy interrupted and said how it would be great for her back.

Ted joked “We can put you up in it!”

She quickly shot back “Fuck you Ted – this one is for your little show. I’d do mine alone with no one looking.” As if she were too good for the one we had.

I guess I didn’t blame her – I was afraid I’d be hung upside down and immobilized and that was very scary! My nipples had blossomed and become erect and my pussy was as juicy as ever but I think it was the adrenalin of standing there naked and seeing all of these future torments and NOT that they turned me on.

I should have been complaining and refusing to use them – but I was in awe and waiting for Savannah or Lloyd or even my Aunt to say that.

O.J. stood there quietly after she interrupted waiting for her to continue. He was clearly not happy with her involvement but continued showing us his baby. “Crystal,” he volunteered my Aunt to demonstrate.

“Yes Master?” my Aunt dutifully responded like a brainless bim-bot from planet Slut.

“I like this new change,” O.J. smiled at her attitude change. “Just don’t get TOO obedient or some of these guys will think you are cured and don’t need their help being kept in line.”

“Thank you Master,” my Aunt cooed in agreement, “I think it’s for the best if I just behave myself and let you and Ted make decisions for me from now on. I am glad you like my new attitude.”

He stood her up against a long board and strapped her wrists and ankles to it quickly. Then he pushed the chair upside down and Crystal shouted “Whoaaaaa!” but maintained her stoic demeanor right after as she was flipped completely upside down.

Her tits hung down to her face and she was completely immobilized in this position.

“It’s called a hang-up,” O.J. explained as if he were teaching a lecture. “It is supposed to be inversion therapy. It’s perfectly safe and once you get the hang of it you can stay in there for about 15 minutes – just don’t overdo it at first.”

Odd-Jobs sounded compassionate, but then explained he didn’t want us to throw up all over the floor in his nice new booth. The guys really didn’t seem to care how engorged our tits were and I was afraid to ask Lloyd but I saw his balls looked swollen from the rubber band that had been around them all night – although he looked happy to be standing there naked with us like this was all some joke.

He pulled the padding to the side behind my Aunt’s ass “You have unprecedented access to the butt, tits, and pussy in this baby!”

“It has running water, and back-up batteries if the electricity goes out – about the only thing it doesn’t have is Wi-Fi,” he joked.

“What good would that fucking do?” Daisy asked crassly, “Allow Ted sit here and look at porn all day?”

Conner pointed out helpfully that with an iPhone or an iPad, and the right add-on utilities, they could take credit cards with it.

“I like how you think, son!” O.J. patted Conner on the back. Conner had started to suggest if they had a wi-fi hot-spot they could allow people to rent the use of computers but O.J ignored him to introduce the man who did all the work on the trailer.

“He worked as soon as you left to a few hours ago,” O.J. saw Catfish walking up to the pool.

“Sorry I am late – I was trying to get a little sleep before the big day. I am a carpenter and an electrician by trade,” Ted’s friend smiled proudly at his creation.

“I was just about to show them the stand-up suggestion box you made!” O.J said excitedly.

Catfish walked us over to a wooden board that was painted to look like a life-size version of Crystal in a very skimpy one piece bathing suit that barely covered her huge nipples and accented all her curves. The word “SUGGESTIONS” was written in red on her tits and there was a slot to put the notes between her boobs.

There was an explanation underneath that in smaller letters “Have an idea to help get us out of this financial mess and keep my girls’ attitudes in check? Drop it in between these tits!” and it was signed ‘TED THE RINGMASTER’.

“I didn’t get a good look at you yesterday so I tried to do my best to approximate,” he apologized to Crystal for the over-sized tits and exaggerated hips, but she smiled at him.

I scanned her face for any sign of shock or surprise. A hint that she sucked in air in surprise at yet another fresh humiliation. The entire trailer park would be passing this cheese-cake sign and seeing her face painted on the over-sized tits, but she didn’t show the least bit sign of someone who was mortified she would be associated forever with this sign.

It had been planted firmly in the ground and there was no easy way to take it down.

“You did a very good job, Sir,” she offered him kindly. “I am surprised you didn’t make the letter slot my pussy slit.”

“That is a very good idea,” Catfish rubbed his chin the way Ted often did when he was pensively considering something.

“Can you put on there not to ask me for money?” Ted suggested and Catfish made a note of the request for the future.

“Did you show them the other additions?” Catfish pointed to a stack of three grapefruit sized softballs on the counter of the stall but O.J. shook his head “Not yet! We are just setting up, and that isn’t ready yet is it?”

I wasn’t sure what “That” was and I was too afraid to ask – if it had to do with softballs.

Catfish said it wasn’t and explained he had worked his ass off all night and was lucky to get this much done.

“You did a very good job,” Daisy sounded like someone who was used to workers doing what they were expected to do and was simply placating him for doing his job.

“Who the fuck is this?” Catfish wondered aloud.

“This is my sister,” Ted seemed VERY reluctant to explain to Catfish that she would be sharing the assistant manager position with him.

Crystal had been left in the inversion chair naked and was starting, after only a few minutes, to feel woozy. Ted asked her if she was okay because she sounded like she was about to “Yack” and she told him that she would remain however he liked.

“It’s not as much fun if you are going to be like this,” Ted joked and untied her and Savannah from their stations.

“So maybe that is her game?” Savannah whispered to me. “She is trying to overdo it to make Ted be nicer to her?”

I didn’t think that was what she was doing. Crystal could have been uncooperative and just stopped if she had really wanted to do that.

Ted didn’t give us time to chat – announcing we needed to get our butt plugs in because customers were starting to arrive.

“Show them the V.I.P. section,” he told Catfish. Catfish still wanted an explanation on what Daisy was doing here. He pulled out a canvas awning from the right side of the trailer and pointed out that V.I.Ps could sit in shade with the six or seven folding chairs. Then he unrolled a make-shift curtain to reveal a stage inside the booth.

The stage wasn’t big enough to stand on, but you could lay down flat or squat. “There is running water and electricity to clean up in here,” Catfish didn’t explain what that meant to us, but I was a bit worried.

Catfish pointed to one of the security cameras that were mounted on the side of the pool and a red-light was flashing. “The top V.I.P. of them all should be able to check on the stage from the comfort of his double-wide ultra-deluxe model trailer-home!”

“Uh,” O.J. laughed and clarified, “Junior’s daddy is still the TOP V.I.P. around here and we call them ‘Manufactured Homes’ now-a-days.”

Catfish grinned at him and accepted his answer adding “It was a bitch to wire it in – I worked til 5 a.m. on all of this”

“It shows,” O.J. seemed impressed but Ted said nothing about it.

“Thank you Sir!” my Aunt graciously offered her approval.

“He doesn’t care what a little cum-gobbler like you thinks,” Daisy warned my Aunt to be quiet and my Aunt agreed with her that he didn’t.

“I just didn’t want to remain silent about showing my gratitude. It’s obvious Catfish did this so we could get disciplined in full view of the community I grew up in, and my kids grew up in, and I would have sneered at him for wasting his time before Ted and you decided to start educating me on my many shortcomings, Ma’am,” Crystal’s voice was that of the perfect submissive, accepting responsibility for her behavior, and Daisy couldn’t’ argue it with her – so she let it drop.

“Ladies and Lloyd,” Ted told us, “Assume THE position,” which he explained meant grabbing our asses and bending over with our legs apart. “Daisy,” he instructed his sister to lube up our butt-plugs and insert them. My brother dutifully removed the straps from Lloyd and my wrists so I could join my Aunt and Savannah without being told.

“Lube?” Daisy sounded un-impressed and scrunched up her nose “Isn’t that too good for this lot of trailer trash?”

“Just do what I tell you,” Ted dismissed her petulant whining and pointed out she hadn’t written world’s best son either.

“I will, I will,” Daisy shrugged “Jesus, you would think this is fucking life or death or rocket science. People aren’t going to understand all these rules and shit or read everything anyway. I think you’ve gone way over-board here!”

Ted looked angry with her but explained, “It is like one of those carts at the fair that show all the food and ways you can order it. You don’t have to read everything – just see what you like and pick that,” he rubbed his chin and considered the garish, over-the-top, sex-booth with pride. “I think it’s great – a lot of action and movement, you did a great job Catfish!”

“So my cut is 5% of the profit now, right?” Catfish asked point blank.

“I told you HALF of what I make,” Ted had promised him 5% but was trying to wordsmith it in case he had to give his 5% to his sister.

“The deal was 5% off the top,” Catfish sounded skeptical. He jingled some keys in his pocket as if he were going to lock up the trailer and take it away some place.

Ted told him not to get his panties in a knot. “You will get your 5%,” Ted explained that his sister was going to take Conner’s 5%, but that he was going to give us a chance to let Conner keep his money, and that he’d work it out with Catfish somehow.

“I know how your “somehows” end up being an I.O.U,” Catfish sounded skeptical adding, “That Gaylord family name isn’t a credit card anymore.”

It was at that moment Daisy was squirting goop on our buttplugs and planting them all the way up our asses “I thought these were going to be much bigger,” she mused as she pushed mine up my butt. “I am sure these girls have had bigger things in their asses.”

She apologized to Lloyd before she inserted hers but he told her “Fair is fair – do what you gotta do!”

She laughed at my Aunt nefariously before inserting the thumb-sized plug up her ass; but failed to get a rise out of my Aunt other than a, “Thank you Mistress! Push it in as far as you can so it doesn’t drop out please? I am not allowed to touch it myself without permission.”

Savannah held up her middle finger and Daisy told her, “You are going to wish you had been nice to me!”

“We’ll see, Ma’am,” Savannah responded with a false sweetness that was oozing snark – snarkacasm.

“Ellen,” Daisy told me she hoped we’d be good friends by the time this is all over “I am sure you want to, don’t you?” as she worked the latex-coated thumb plug into my rectum.

“We’ll see, Ma’am,” I replied with the same false-dulcitude of my cousin. Savannah high fived me while remaining bent over when Daisy turned to inform her brother that she had us ready.

“Testing,” Ted zapped Lloyd and Lloyd made a ‘yoink’ sound.

“Testing Savannah,” Ted zapped Savannah and I heard her ass buzz. “You are supposed to say something so I know it’s working,” Ted informed her.

“I didn’t know – it’s fucking working though, Sir!” Savannah answered him.

“You will know,” Ted waved his green notebook and explained he was going to go over the S.O.P. with us. He explained that stood for ‘Slut Operating Principles’ and that he was going to make sure everything seemed fair and clear for us.

“Testing Ellen’s bright little ass,” Ted thumbed my remote sending the lightest setting to buzz inside my ass.

“It worked Sir, may I stand up?” I answered, and he told me I could and that I needed to get dressed.

Ted did the same thing to my Aunt who replied “Thank you Master! I appreciate the constant reminder I am your bitch!”

“Whose pussy is that?” he pointed to my Aunt’s slit and she told him it belonged to him. My Aunt has a sultry voice that has been soaked in whiskey and cigarettes so there is a slight rasp to it – when she wants to sound sexy she can sound VERY sexy- this was one of those times.

“Whose asshole is that? He asked her and she answered patiently it was his as well.

“Your mouth, cunt and asshole belong to all of us,” he laughed. “I just own 10% of it.”

He told the three of us to get our suits on, but made my Aunt remain as she was – which she had no problem with either.

“Lloyd,” Ted told his step-son he had something special for him. He had a white-loin cloth and a black belt for him. “Today – you are going to be Conan the motherfucking Barbarian.”

Lloyd smiled and flexed his muscles while roaring a barbarian cry.

“You two cunts,” Ted assigned Savannah and I matching rebel-flag bikinis. “You wore this shit yesterday and it looked nice.” The bikinis were mostly string with very little left to the imagination, but having strode through the park completely naked I was grateful to get them on.

Conner even tied mine in the back for me. “Thank you Sir,” I told him that was an unexpected kindness and he doffed an imaginary fedora to me.

Ted threw a towel over his wife’s back and told her she could put that on for now, “You are up first in the V.I.P.”

“A towel is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have!” my brother imitated a computer playback of information, “Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta!”

Ted shook his head like he was an idiot and ignored his goofing around, “You are going to get your cold moons in the booth and up on that stage and shave your pussy and ass – everything.”

“Yes Master, thank you!” My Aunt scampered off obediently like a court-jester to her king. There was a sink and some cheap dollar store razors below the thick wooden-platform that we were supposed to sit. My Aunt was expected to shave herself in front of empty folding chairs, facing away from the entrance to the pool and towards the trailer park. I was told you couldn’t see her unless you were sitting in the V.I.P. Area, with the awning in place.

The Leaner paid Ted for the V.I.P access and walked under the curtain but leaned against a chair instead of sitting.

“Do you like it?” Ted asked him if he liked the layout and the rule system.

“I don’t understand it,” the Leaner answered quickly, “What is with all this writing?”

“See, I told you!” Daisy put her hands on her hips as she stood next to Savannah and I while we got ready for a day of being brats and washing cars.

“It’s just that it’s hard to follow. I mean – are these rules? Or are they suggestions? And can you possibly do all these things in a single day?” The Leaner seemed skeptical.

“Who says we have to do ALL of them in a day?” Ted shook his head in disbelief that he was being questioned on the effort they put into painting up the van. “You pick the shit you want to do and you do it or you shut the fuck up!” he laughed.

The Leaner sat in a chair and then leaned back, “These chairs aren’t comfortable either.”

“Then stand your ass up,” Ted had become impatient with the Leaner.

“Ooh, I am sorry – I think I hit a nerve!” The Leaner stood up and went back to leaning against his chair.

“I just don’t want to hear it,” Ted told him. “You can watch my wife shave her pussy quietly and respectfully; and if she misses even one spot – you holler at me!”

Crystal smiled at the Leaner and looked right at him while spraying a flexible hose of water on her stomach and down her chest, to put on an erotic show of shaving herself for the one guy watching her.

“What else does this thing do?” Ted asked Catfish. “Does it have that shower I asked for?”

“No, I couldn’t hook that up,” Catfish promised he could have some of the things working by tomorrow night if he has the materials and is going to get paid.

“When a true champion comes face to face with his darkest hour, he will do whatever it takes to rise above! A real man fights, and fights, and then fights some more. Because surrender is death, and death is for pussies And my ass ain’t no pussy. My ass is a fucking champion!” Ted didn’t confirm Catfish’s getting paid for the trailer and blustered his way through his response.

“Well then,” Catfish opened an ice-box full of Pabst Blue Ribbon “How about a fucking beer for a champion then?”

“Damn straight,” Ted popped the top to one and starting drinking at 9:30 in the morning.

“Hey, look at this,” Catfish saw Crystal’s stereo in the back of the golf-cart and excitedly “Did you bring this so I could hook it up?”

“Nah,” Daisy informed him that it was going to be sold.

“Let me hook this up and I can blast some serious tunes! The speakers are good to go!” Catfish asked him.

Ted had to make a decision between Catfish and Daisy. “You two are tearing me apart, Dog!” Ted said “You are both my fucking Commanders – now I have to decide between the two of your plans? On the one hand immediate cash for this piece of shit old stereo from 1988 and on the other some sweet tunes? Hook that shit up, brother!”

Catfish high fived Ted with a broad smile and had the tunes playing in no time.

This was going to be a day of hard times at the Buckman!