Chapter Thirty-Four

This motherfucker has been in more Windows than Bill Gates

Savannah was given permission to shower and Crystal was given permission to use the toilet. They both made a show of making it seem like they were thankful to my brother, but in truth – they were just pulling his chain. They did wait until he had given them permission to go, but their grandiose obsequiousness had more to do with their sense of humor about being timed for these activities than it did to stroking his little ego.

The awkward quiet slowly built back up to giggles from the rest of us. My Aunt made no secret that Conner probably didn’t want to see or hear her on the toilet but he stood there stoically with his arms crossed.

She proceeded to prove that girls can be just as nasty as men when it comes to having to shit. “I swallowed about 17 hot dogs whole today,” she explained un-apologetically to everyone when the first explosive back-blasts began. Even she had to laugh at the sound of thunderous expulsions in the toilet bowl.

The laughter reached its crescendo when Savannah stopped washing herself and asked “Could we get a courtesy flush!”

Ted yelled down the hall-way for us to shut up and for Conner to keep us quiet. We only quieted our giggling and kept smiling at each other.

I had my hands bound behind my back now. I had managed to work my wrists behind my back in order to wipe properly. I observed to no one in particular, “It feels weird not having to get dressed to leave the house. I feel like I should be doing something but I am just standing here.”

“You could go back in the living room and ask Ted if he has something for you to do,” Conner offered. I have discovered a universal law of men is you can seldom state a problem to them they don’t feel compelled to offer you a solution or a next step.

“I could,” I said with a wry grin that implied that I would not though. I was trying to step over my own hands so that I could slip my wrists back in front of me. I didn’t even try not to expose myself at this point. Lloyd and Conner had seen all of me – and this contortion required me to step in such a way that my pussy “gap” for lack of a better term – opened up like a pita pocket.

“I am very envious of you Sis,” Conner said after the initial laughter of listening to his Aunt’s bowel movement had subsided.

“How is that?” I was confused. He was the guy with his pants on and the timer and I was the one with my wrists tied and naked.

“You got around 800 dollars today for working and all that attention. I wish I had a nice body like you and Lloyd,” he mused.

“You will,” Lloyd assured him he just had to keep working out and eating his Wheaties.

“I think genetically I am predisposed to an ectomorphic frame,” Conner shrugged at the acceptance he would probably always be small of frame.

“I don’t know about that,” Lloyd replied confidentially. He didn’t say anything more, even though we waited for him to. He really didn’t know about “that” and that is all he had to say about it - I giggled.

Conner warned Savannah she had about a minute left and she needed to dry herself off.

“Hold your dick for a minute,” she forgot to call him sir and she challenged his authority to time her all in one second. “O.J. and them can wait just one minute if they have too. They won’t leave us behind. They are too excited to make us go through whatever little game they have in store for us at the mall.”

Crystal couldn’t quite get her wrists behind her in order to wipe. “Okay – who is going to take one for the team here and wipe me in back?” she wiped her front with toilet paper.

There were no takers “Come on – I don’t want to air-dry like this guys,” Crystal repeated her request.

Conner asked if he could do it.

My Aunt stood up slightly bent at the knees– she was tall, even without heels and Conner came up to about mid-boob on her. Her body was very voluptuous and curvy, and to scale it had perfect symmetry. It was just bigger, and her ass and tits jutted out more pronounced than most women.

“All yours champ,” she turned around for him. She also forgot to say Sir or perhaps it was intentionally.

“Really?” he ripped off some toilet paper and stood there looking at her ass.

“For fuck’s sake,” my Aunt was impatient with him. She rested forward with her hands on the counter and told him, “Don’t finger me – just wipe my butt, please Sir?”

Conner seemed nervous and I felt bad for him. “Would you like me to do it, Sir?”

I was probably a better choice for having to wipe her and I realized this might be one of the first time’s Conner ever touches a woman in her most private and intimate of areas.

Conner rabidly told me ‘NO’ and then moved forward to put one hand on her ass cheeks to pull her apart slightly.

“It’s not going to bite, Sir,” Crystal seemed to be regretting letting him have a look under her hood as well.

Conner was nervous and he was also as hard as a rock in his jeans. He held the tissue with two fingers and slid gingerly between my Aunt’s ass cheeks like he was spreading peanut-butter on a sandwich with a butter knife.

“Donger!!” Savannah didn’t shriek in terror the way I might, as she wrapped her knuckles angrily against the window. The blonde-haired, middle aged man was peeping in our window and half of his head was visible in the bathroom window.

“Get the fuck out of here Donger!” Crystal yelled at the window while my brother wiped her ass. It had taken him three tissues, but now he had grown in confidence enough to dab and wipe her.

“Technically,” Conner insisted that they were supposed to call him Sir.

“He’s looking in our fucking window!” Savannah held her hands over her boobs out of habit. She had spent all day having them stared at, but someone violating our space in the home was not cool.

Ted walked down the hall-way to check on us, “Let him look and be respectful to him.”

He stood in the doorway and waved at Donger who raised his head back and smiled a very broad smile.

“This motherfucker has been in more Windows than Bill motherfucking Gates,” Ted took a sip of beer and looked at us in disbelief. “They aren’t even shaved and you are in here rubbing up on Crystal’s ass?”

“Sorry Sir,” Conner explained quickly about her being bound and unable to wipe. Then he said that that had been precisely enough time to shower and go to the bathroom and that he hadn’t had a chance to do either because he was doing what he was told to do.

“Assholes, I am surrounded by Assholes,” Ted threw his hands up in the air and stalked off to the living room. “You’ve got five fucking minutes and he should be here.”

Donger continued to peek his head into the window and watch us. We waved at him and this made him blush and pop his head back out of the window like a turtle into his shell.

He has an almost child-like look on his face when he is staring into the window of happiness.

I don’t think he expected to see all of us showering together. Then again – maybe the rumors were flying over the Buckman and that is precisely why he came to our window at this time of day.

Savannah flipped him the bird mouthing silently, “Ted didn’t say we couldn’t flip him off.”

Crystal thanked my brother for wiping her ass and told him he was “just playing now. Go ahead and flush and I’ll take that shower.”

My Aunt jumped in to the dirty shower while it was still running. She shivered and shook her tits immediately in the ice-cold water. I think this may have been one of the first times Crystal was last to shower – or because she gets up so late in the day normally she has never noticed.

“Okay,” Savannah sat on the bowl and warned us that she wasn’t going to hold back and that if Conner had to watch, then she was going to make him watch. She parted her legs and pissed forcefully into the bowl. “That is how you fucking do it,” she shamelessly said she had to piss like a race-horse and when done bounced off the toilet; and as her wrists were not bound, effortless wiped herself.

“No Conner sir,” she told him in no uncertain terms, “Sorry to say - You aren’t wiping my ass for me.” Savannah grinned and threw her toilet tissue into the toilet before flushing with a devilish grin, dumping even colder water on her mother in the shower and causing her to yowl.

Even Donger laughed.

Donger has been described as a cross between Terry Bradshaw, the Coaches assistant on Coach and Hulk Hogan. He is tan, in his early 40s, and has long strands of blonde hair down to his back but is balding in the center of his head. He is fairly muscular and has a very broad face.

He is both a flasher who streaks around the trailer park and a Peeping Tom. I was told that there are actually several in the park and some who only flash and some who only peep. This is so common place here that people do not actually call the police, but they will chase him off and some will even shoot at him.

He is apparently mostly harmless but knowing he had been in the window was creepy. He had been watching me while I was showering and going to the bathroom before we noticed he was there.

Ted apologized to Conner when we came out of the bathroom into the living room. He did it right in front of everyone and he was serious.

“Conner,” he said, “I realize you were just doing what you were told and you did your level best – considering what you are working with it is a miracle they are done on time.” He grinned at us.

Then he agreed that Conner was absolutely right, we didn’t have enough time to shave, but tonight when we got home we would.

“I didn’t mean to undermine you,” he offered and added that he understood why he had to wipe his wife’s ass. “She’ll be sitting on my lap in O.J.’s Cadillac and I don’t want her butt stains all over my nice new white corduroys!”

Ted smiled and pointed to a new pair of pants he had bought the day before. They were incredibly out of style and ugly to the point that they stood out as a monumental lapse in judgment fashion-wise. They were perfect for Ted.

“So does this mean you don’t think I am an asshole, Sir?” Conner asked because Ted had walked away in anger calling him one.

“No,” Ted smiled, “You are still an asshole but then so am I.” He tossled Conner’s short red hair and they both grinned.

I wondered where Maw-Maw slept when she was here. She hadn’t left and yet I don’t think she moved from the couch more than a few times if any. I think she might have been over-staying her welcome if Crystal had been allowed to complain.

She was very proud of Ted for apologizing and admitting his mistakes. She also seemed to be very supportive of Ted’s plan to discipline us. She said she would work on some things to show him when he got home and had a notebook of her own.

She pulled me in close right before we left and told me an observation. “I’ve seen you becoming a malapert little twat like your cousin Savannah. I hope you understand that this adjustment is for your own benefit. I know that you are basically a good girl Ellen, but you are walking a dangerous path and picking up vile influences and nasty habits. I want you to think about that tonight.”

I answered “Yes, Ma’am” and I would think about what she said on the way to the mall.

Malapert - Impudently bold in speech or manner; saucy. An impudent, saucy person. Boldly disrespectful to a person of higher standing. This word is gender neutral, so it's equally applicable to both male and female.

I have given details about our day to day life, including even how we were powerless to make a flasher stop watching us while we did the most intimate of things in front of each other, because this was to-date the most adventurous and surreal part of my life. I want you to feel like you have the same smells, sensations and visualize how life was here. I tend not to skip anything that might be relevant for purposes of the story. I want you to feel like you babysat me from the V.I.P. section at the pool during the day.

However, the trip to town was pretty much as it happened on Monday evening.

The big difference was I had to ride naked with my hands bound behind my back. We had been hustled outside in broad-daylight at 5:30 PM and loaded into Junior’s spiffy new white Cadillac. I need to stress that it is not that no one noticed we were naked. We were clearly noticed; and I think people were now waiting, watching from their windows or porches, and taking bets as to what we would do when we came out of the trailer.

I don’t understand the mentality of someone who sits outside their house on lawn chairs in the yard all of the time but they do it a lot at the Buckman. I would imagine that sitting inside and watching TV or working on the computer would be more enjoyable, but a lot of these people have neither so they chose to sit outside. Maybe they get off on watching the antics of the people.

Savannah waved at one of the men sitting on his patio drinking beer with a big smile on her face, but under her breath said with her sassy, southern accent, “Ya big pervert!”

We were packed in tightly and this time I had to sit naked on Ryan’s lap. That was awkward considering his lukewarm kiss and the possible expectation I was as smitten with him as he seemed to be with me.

Ted told corny jokes and farted while he girl-watched as we rode through the Buckman. Ted had his notebook with him and he would periodically start writing something down or even sketch something into the book. This was where he was making his plan and he was very tight-lipped about it only saying, “You’ll see soon enough!”

Savannah was the only girl who was allowed to wear clothes to the mall. Ted had picked them out. They consisted of a slight denim skirt, high heels and a tube top. She sat on Lloyd’s lap and wise-cracked the whole way about him having to be naked.

Lloyd good naturedly took it and dished out his own jokes as well. His often-blind enthusiasm actually made this a lot more bearable. I think to Lloyd, this was all a huge joke or a game and he didn’t look the least bit nervous. My cousin had the body of a young, rock god and a handsome face; so I think he could get away with a lot more silliness that would have just been seen as disturbing if a scrawny nerd like my little brother would have embraced what we were doing.

Crystal had it worse than the rest of us because Ted insisted on riding with the window rolled half-way down with my Aunt on his lap and visible to other cars. They couldn’t be sure she was topless because the windows were darkly tinted, but there were a few who honked at us and cheered. She joked to Ted, “If we get pulled over though, then YOU are sucking their dick to get us out of the ticket.”

Nelly Jr. was sandwiched into the back between Savannah and I; and I think he enjoyed being between two older, white girls because he said something to that affect. He called it a “reverse Oreo” – “Two white girls on the outside and a creamy chocolate center!”

O.J. drove and kept quiet for most of the ride while the radio played old country songs. I have to admit – a part of me found it kind of thrilling to be in a car completely naked while others wore clothes. I know I should have been humiliated; but there was something taboo and exciting about the fact our windows were jet black and no one could see me. I had never imagined riding in a car naked – it seemed so over the top and outrageous.

Another part of me was thinking about what would happen when we got to the mall and how it felt to be sitting on Ryan’s lap in the nude. I once had secret thoughts he might be a boyfriend; but now I ignored him while he put his arms around my belly and probably day-dreamed of another kiss with me – the persistant bulge in his jeans confirmed as much.

I didn’t have the heart to tell him I was not interested. Crystal had warned me when this started “Don’t let them fall in love with you” but she had curiously added “But, Make them fall in love with you”. I wasn’t exactly sure what she meant by that but at the moment I was regretting Ryan falling in love (or lust) with me.

The family seemed to function through their dysfunction with humor. It was one of the underlying themes that the darker and bleaker some things may be to accept – the greater the chance one of them would joke about it.

Our first stop was not the mall. It was on one of the side-street alley-ways in the old downtown area. It was a run-down block with stores that were once vibrant and busy with activity, but were now boarded up and forgotten.

The sun doesn’t set until well after 7PM in the summertime and it was well lit outside. Ryan whispered reassuringly “Be strong” and I thanked him and offered him a wintry smile in exchange.

Three of us were naked in the car and when we stopped Ted announced, “Everybody out!”

I looked at Savannah but she was already stepping out of the car on the other side. Nelly Jr. was pushing me to get out on my side. “Sir?” I asked in a panic for an explanation.

“There isn’t anyone out here but bums and they could use a little amusement,” Ted answered me dismissively, holding up the clothes he had chosen for us to wear.

Crystal was the first to reach for hers but he pulled them out of the way, “Not so fast.”

He explained he wanted us to kneel on the sidewalk and give thanks for the clothes we were about to receive.

“My Father who art in heaven - blessed be the clothes,” Crystal got on one knee with her ass jiggling as if to placate him and begged, “Now please Ted! We are playing your game but Jesus fucking Christ – this is a little over-dramatic don’t you think?”

“No one will see your precious fake-ass tits,” Ted shook his head. “You were walking around with them out at the fucking Buckman. You think they are too good for this part of town? You better remember to call me Sir when you talk, or I’ll put you over my knee and spank your ass right here and now before we continue!”

No one answered him or challenged his statement. Lloyd, Crystal, and I kneeled before Ted and he insisted we sit up straight with our thighs off our calves. My hands were bound behind me still and it was very uncomfortable to kneel this way.

“Savannah,” he addressed her, “You won the perfect asshole competition so you don’t have to do this, but I want you to watch and learn because you will still be under discipline just like my other little bitches when they get dressed!”

When Ted wasn’t looking, Savannah stuck her tongue out at me with a mixture of playfulness and the look only a spoiled brat can give when they received something you wanted and you don’t have it.

“Now what are you?” Ted asked us and waited for an answer. We weren’t sure what he was expecting to hear. He chided us for not anticipating and told us the answer he was expecting was “little bitches.”

He asked again and we gave him the answer he was seeking in relative unison. There wasn’t a single soul stirring on this street but us, however I knew at any moment a car could come whizzing past or someone might happen along.

I know this sounds silly, but I felt more comfortable being naked at the entrance to the Buckman. I felt even more comfortable once we got to the trailer and I could be inside. There was something that made me feel insulated from the outside world in those places.

This was a new environment and it was scary. The town was small by anyone’s standards. It consisted of four corner blocks around a courthouse building in the center. The mall and J-mart were slightly outside of the town proper. The “downtown” as it is called was once a thriving center of commerce. The buildings were all made of the same red-brick and reminiscent of a much older architectural style from the 1940s. They were mostly boarded up now and abandoned. Ice-cream malt-shoppes and places that sold sewing machines only, had fallen out of favor with the public and been replaced by the big-box stores.

“Now my little bitches,” Ted spoke to us like a general addressing his troops before the big battle. “You may be wondering what is in this little notebook.” Ted held up his green loose-leaf notebook. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to know what was in the book but thought it probably wasn’t going to end up being favorable to us girls.

“All in good time my little bitches,” he used that word again and tried to seem mysterious. He ended up sounding a little pretentious and I think even he realized that. He started talking a little more normally, “I am going to have a naughty and a nice list. Right now Savannah is on my fucking nice list, but you do NOT want to get on my naughty list.”

I was surprised the others went along with this. I went along with it because Crystal and Lloyd were down on their knees, but I wanted to get up and run away rather than line up naked on a dirty mostly-deserted street.

Ted held up our money. There were several hundred dollars for each of us. “You earned this today because you let me run shit. This is your money and you can spend it tonight. I won’t touch it– but until Sunday night you are my bitch. I will be making New Years’ resolutions for you starting right now because I know how to improve your attitudes.”

I could almost hear Savannah’s eye-rolls from where I was kneeling.

“You can pretend you don’t need it. You can tell yourself that you’ve been pretending to be snotty-bitches who need discipline but the truth is – you REALLY do need it. We are going to work on bringing the fantasy we are selling closer to reality tonight. I have brought some clothes for you to wear.”

Ted indicated a box marked “Bitches” and told us that depending on how well we begged – is how well we would be dressed. We would lose or gain clothing privileges according to how well we acted. “You need to convince me that you are my bitch and willing to let me teach you to behave like good little sluts, because well behaved Ladies and Gentlemen is out of your reach.”

He started with Crystal on the left. “Oh great and wise Ted, my master, and teacher! Please accept me as your little bitch. I am before you naked and unafraid. I ask that you offer me clothes so that I can be appropriately taught the values and right from wrong under you, Sir!”

Ted waited for her to add more and then looked displeased. He threw a thin pair of panties and a bra at her knees and told Conner to cut her bindings so that she could put them on. I could hear her gasp in surprise that it was not good enough. She was also provided some simple heels.

It was my turn now. I wasn’t sure how to beg for my clothes. I thought my Aunt’s begging would have sufficed in the car-wash with a trick and it seemed heart-felt and considerate. I decided to try to over-act the part and see what that got me.

I thrust myself forward onto Ted’s white corduroy pants and cried out, “Please Ted. My mother and father would never discipline me this severely even though I desperately needed it. They wanted to pay me off with fancy clothes; and I now agree that all I really need is the disgusting clothes of a whore to teach me to value the privileges I once had in so much abundance I never appreciated them. Oh Please Ted, I will be a good girl tonight. When you meet my mom and dad will you tell them I have behaved and not given you very much trouble?”

Ted seemed impressed and I was flattered. I was also pleased to see my Aunt give me the stink-eye that I was receiving a short denim-skirt and blouse similar to the one my cousin had on with matching shoes. The top was sheer enough that my nipples would be very visible through the light-blue material.

“We finally going to see Michael after this long? I figured he run off,” Ted seemed surprised my dad wasn’t two states away by now. I wanted to bite his leg instead of caress it the way I was when he put down my father. I mean the possibility of him just seeing how bad the family had it – losing our house, their jobs, their 401k, and then walking or running away from us at our greatest time of need? That just seemed impossible.

“We are supposed to run by and pick them up from the motel they have been staying at in town.”

I could feel Conner cutting my ties from behind my back and I thanked him once I had the use of my hands again. It felt good to be able to move my wrists around. I have to admit – I did take for granted everything you can do when your hands are free that you are only aware of when they are not.

“You are going to behave just like you are in front of Michael and Patricia aren’t you? You made the bet!” Ted wanted clarification while I put my clothes on.

Technically – I had made NO bet. I had participated in a bet knowing that Crystal had made the stakes to include me behaving around Ted. I had been a good sport about behaving this way for money to help the family, but now he had the ability to rub my nose in it with my mom and dad.

“I lost the bet that my Aunt made with you Sir,” I clarified politely, “and I know that you would not make me behave shamefully in front of my parents if I am a good girl tonight and agree to be educated at the car-wash everyday under your tutelage. I ask that you have mercy and not anger my parents with the sordid details of our day!”

I was choosing my words carefully and it came across as if I were talking a bit snooty.

I could hear Savannah complain quietly that what I was calling “Whore clothes” was actually her school clothes.

“I like that,” Ted told me he wanted me to keep talking “That way.” He didn’t define what “That way” actually was and moved on to Lloyd.

Lloyd was on his knees and smiling at Ted. “You know I appreciate this and I don’t know what else to tell you Sir.”

Ted smiled down at Lloyd, “I don’t want you getting erections tonight. Stand up.”

Lloyd sprung up where he was standing and Conner cut his wrist strap off while Ted asked him to elaborate on what he appreciates and why he is willing to continue with this.

“If I am being completely honest, Sir” Lloyd told him as his wrists were released from the ties that bound them, “I kind of enjoy it - It’s funny.”

Ted threw a skimpy short denim skirt that belonged to Savannah and a powder-blue tank top on the ground in front of Lloyd. He had a wig and lipstick for him to put along with some ladies shoes.

“You think it’s funny being my bitch?” Ted asked for a piece of duct-tape and O.J. peeled some off the roll he kept on his workman’s belt. “Put this on your cock – tape it between your legs!”

“Look,” Lloyd smiled after he taped his flaccid cock to his leg, “A mangina!”

“Stop showing off your mangina,” Ted seemed disappointed he had not broken Lloyd’s spirit and instructed him to get dressed.

“What is my name for this, Sir?” Lloyd asked while he was dressing.

“What do you mean?” Ted questioned.

“If someone asks me my name am I supposed to say it’s Lloyd, Sir?” Lloyd asked with an enthusiasm I would not have expected from anyone else.

He was trying to get into the shoes but they barely fit him and he would struggle with those all night. I should also mention so you can visualize, a very athletic male with broad shoulders in a skimpy top has a tendency to still walk like a man.

“I guess you could go by Lloydessa,” Ted considered for a moment.

Savannah was the next to offer a suggestion of “Lloydina!”

Crystal grinned and threw out, “Lloydia or maybe Llydia then?”

It was my brother Conner who said, “What about Lola?”

Ted slapped him on the back and settled for Lola. “Son, your new name is Lola!”

Lloyd (now Lola) thanked my brother and kissed him on the cheek with his recent red-lipsticked lips.

Conner wiped his cheek with disgust, but they both smiled at each other that the name was chosen.

“Look at me,” Lola pranced around in the shoes that were too small for him, “I am a pretty girl!”

“Well Lola,” Ted hustled my cousin and the rest of us into the only store that was still open. He reminded us to be on our best behavior and told us to follow his lead around the store.

There was a big marijuana leaf prominently displayed above the words “Tobacco Store.”

A bell rang as we entered what looked like a quaint, rustic store from the outside. It might have sold books or candles at one time, but now it was clearly used to sell glass water-bongs and things to consume marijuana.

“Welcome to the Metro Adult Megastore Outlet – may I interest you in some E-cigarettes?” the young man behind the counter looked completely stoned but spoke like he wasn’t. He had a “Phish” t-shirt on and a tie-dye style Rastafarian cap.

He alluded to some plastic-eye-dropper bottles against the wall and some cigar-shaped electronic cigarettes.

“No, we don’t need any of that weed shit, we are here to buy some stuff in the adult section.”

There was another section of the store that had a sign clearly marked “OVER 18 only!” and “ID REQUIRED” in red. I knew I looked young but clearly the guy behind the counter would never think Conner was of age to be in here. I felt like it should be against the law for anyone – especially us to even be around all these pipes and paraphernalia.

“I assure you Sir,” the man behind the counter challenged Ted, “This store only sells products for the consumption of tobacco and e-liquids to the appropriately aged people.”

Ted held up a canister that is used for making whip-crème and some nitrous oxide canisters to go into it that he found on a display nearby. “This is for smoking tobacco?”

“Okay sir,” the man said in a very unaffected voice, “That is another thing we sell here that is used in the making of cakes and cake-related products. We sell that as well as adult novelty items and video rentals in the other half of the store.”

“What about the bongs over your head that have a picture of Bob Marley’s face on them? Those are for smoking tobacco?” Ted insisted the man just admit he sold things you could smoke weed in. “Look at those grinders over there with the Grateful Dead logo on them? Those are to take the seeds out of your tobacco are they?”

“I am sorry Sir,” the man said, “Because you have said the word bong, I am no longer allowed to sell you anything. You are free to look, but you cannot buy anything.”

“What the fuck!” Ted insisted the man change his mind. “I’ve got to outfit my little crew of bitches here.”

“You aren’t allowed to bring prostitutes back to the back booths either Sir,” the man said, as if this was a routine request and the rules were well known.

“These are not prostitutes! This is my wife, daughter, son and niece! I am just here to get some things for them.”

“I am sorry Sir, I cannot sell you anything. The correct word is water pipe. We do not know the word you just said or use it in this store,” He nodded without the slightest trace of impatience. I could tell he had a slight satisfaction in telling Ted he wouldn’t sell him anything. It was obvious the counter-guy was hinting to Ted that you can’t ask or openly say you want to use these pipes to smoke marijuana. You have to pretend you have a legitimate purpose other than that.

In a way – this is the same game that we play at the trailer park. The stoner knows what is sold here and what this is used for. The person selling it knows as well. They both mutually agree to pretend it is for another purpose and everyone wins.

“Can I buy something, Sir?” I requested sweetly of the young cashier. His conversation with Ted instantly deflated and the angry energy it was building reset.

“Are you over 18?” He asked me very plainly.

“I am, but I forgot my I.D.” I twirled slowly for him so that he wouldn’t see my face while I lied, “I don’t have any pockets, Sir,” then I told him, “I won’t be purchasing any tobacco related smoking devices though.”

“Oh that is fine then,” he told us to go on back and have a look at the other side of the store. He told us his sister was working that side of the store and she would gladly help us if we have questions.

We walked through garish beaded curtains hanging in an open door-way and we were in another store entirely. There was a long hall-way of very dark video-rooms, that each had thin red-curtains. The hall-way is what separated this half of the store from the other and you have to pass through the video-booths in order to get into the adult section.

We could hear pornos in the few where the red-curtains were drawn closed and the furious fap-fap-fappa of a man masturbating inside.

“Sounds like someone stirring up Macaroni and cheese!” Ted said and I almost doubled-over in laughter at his comic timing. He looked at me as if he hadn’t been joking and I got serious and followed him.

There were about a dozen booths completely empty. I wondered, with the internet so full of porn, who would go to places like this.

Once we passed through the beaded curtains on the other end of the hallway we entered a new store. This one was filled with latex costumes, porn DVDs, and the walls were lined with flesh-colored dildos and sex party items. The first thing I noticed was an ice-cube tray that made ice-cubes in the shape of tiny penises.

I wondered, “Who on earth would want that and why?”

Ted grabbed it and picked up a red shopping basket and began getting items and putting them in.

A girl who looked identical to the man behind the counter on the head-shop side of the store, except she had long blonde hair and softer features, welcomed us “Namaste’ and “May the muse Erato grace you!” she said with a tranquil voice.

“I don’t have time for that shit,” Ted dismissed her. “Where are the handcuffs and rubber ball gags?”

“My brother banned you from purchases – did he not?” she had obviously heard our discussion in the other half of the store.

“Fuck,” Ted sounded frustrated. “I am trying to give you a shit-ton of business and you walk around here giving me shit because I am not pretending you smoke tobacco out of a fucking six-way bong with Cheech and Chong’s fucking face on it?”

I noticed behind her counter was a lot of incense burners and books. She had a large poster dominating her space of a young woman with a joyous air, crowned with ivy, wearing boots and holding a comic mask in her hand and holding a long trumpet in her other one.

“Is this Thalia, Ma’am?” I asked her before she could respond to Ted. I think she was going to ban us from the store.

“That is Thalia the Muse who presided over comedy and idyllic poetry,” she answered me with a delight in her voice and a melody in her step – gliding towards me.

“Are there other muses?” I asked.

“There were nine daughters of Zeus who became muses,  Clio (History), Urania (Astronomy), Melpomene (Tragedy), Thalia (Comedy), Terpsichore (Dance), Calliope (Epic Poetry), Erato (Love Poetry), Polyhymnia (Songs to the Gods), Euterpe (Lyric Poetry).”

“But you like Thalia the best of them all?” I asked.

“She shows me that in tragedy, to find comedy; and in comedy – there is always tragedy. YOU are free to purchase anything in the store – but HE may not,” she glided back to her counter to read her books and let us have free reign of the store.

Ted thanked me quietly when no one was looking. I was actually very flattered by that.

The rest of us roamed the store looking at the curious items to be found in a sex-boutique.

There were sexy corsets that laced up in the back and satin panties. There were sex DVDs with titles like “Butt Bangers 2” and “Midget Porn Ranch” that were extremely graphic. I felt like I should not be in here.

Signs on the wall clearly said ID was required for purchase and I couldn’t help but feel guilty I had lied.

“This looks nice,” Crystal held up a sexy negligee that barely covered anything on her body. I was surprised the woman behind the counter said nothing about my Aunt’s wearing a white lace bra and thong, and assumed that even an adult-store might have a dress code. My Aunt didn’t look entirely out of place with her cleavage on display and with the skimpy panties she might have passed for a mannequin.

“You can buy it for turning me on in the bedroom, baby!” Ted darted his tongue out between his fingers graphically and added, “But I am here to get some things that we need for tomorrow! Half of this shit I am going to get cheaper at the pet store and hardware store.” He made no secret of his disdain for the store and its customer service now that they banned him from buying anything.

Crystal set the lingerie down and walked around more to browse.

Ryan found his way over to where I was standing. I pretended to be measuring the relative value of the different lubes and gels that heated and cooled the body.

“So,” he said.

I cringed because I had no response to that, that did not sound snarky and sarcastic – Snarkastic. A word I had to invent for pretty much everything Savannah says.

“Did you not like the kiss? You’ve been dodging me since this morning.”

“I have not Sir!” I protested sweetly – but now that I thought about it he was right. I explained, “I have no privacy and you know exactly where I am at all times. I think I couldn’t dodge you even if I wanted too.”

“You do want to though,” Ryan looked sweetly at me, “don’t you?”

“Ryan you are a nice guy,” I told him. I could see him wince when I said that. I meant it in the best way possible, but he must have heard it before and it stung. “I don’t mean it like that,” that only caused him to shrink a bit more from me as I recognized he could take that as an insult.

“I am just,” I held my hands up to my body, “having to go through bitch training right now and with all the money issues my family is facing – this is not a good time to meet anyone new.”

“It’s not you,” he chuckled while he predicted the next thing I would say, “it’s me, right?”

“I don’t know what to tell you,” I whispered back to him while pretending to look at penis-shaped coffee mugs with breast-shaped milk dispensers.

“You can call me Sir from now on for starters,” he warned, as he turned and sulked away without looking at me again. He would not make eye-contact in the store at all. I felt like I must have broken his heart, but I would remember to call him Sir if that made him happy. He was just angry at me, but I thought it was for the best I not lie to him.

“Ted you would look great in these ass-less chaps, Sir!” Savannah held up a pair of leather Cowboy chaps with the butt on display and laughed. She was just teasing him.

“Oh yeah?” Ted mused “Let me see how they look on you.”

“I was just teasing Sir,” Savannah put them back on the rack, but Ted wasn’t. He looked at her and she looked at the woman behind the counter who offered no protest.

“Where is the changing room, Ma’am?” Savannah asked when she realized Ted was serious.

“It is just us in here – you can put them on right here,” Ted insisted. Savannah looked at the woman behind the counter to see what she’d say. “You didn’t have a problem flashing your ass at guys all day!”

She sighed and unsnapped her skirt to wriggle out of the tiny garment between rows of porno DVD and VHS tapes on the shelves.

“Bend at the waist when you are undressing,” Ted was standing over her and asked her mother, “That is what you taught her isn’t it? It’s more pleasing to men?”

Crystal had no choice but to answer “Yes Sir.” She had in fact told us both that signature move to give men the full view of our asses, and even to wait a moment to let them follow us back up with their eye.

Savannah didn’t really have a problem with this as much as she did being made to do it in the store. She bent over slowly and pulled her skirt down around her ankles before stepping out of it. She held the ass-less chaps up to her and said, “I am a little bit taller than you – you are about 5’4” aren’t you Sir?” as she put them on for him.

Ted bristled at the remark and shouted he was “5’8”.

Savannah shrugged as if it were the same thing and then modeled the pants for him.

“You are my little ass expert,” Ted called Conner over to where he was standing to look at Savannah from behind. “How does that look to you?”

Conner took his time drinking in Savannah’s ass while she impatiently tapped her foot. “I think it’s nice but I’d rather her wear something with lift, to make her butt stick out and up and to keep her ass cheeks separated.”

Savannah made a ‘harumph’ sound in disagreement and absent-mindedly put a finger under each ass-cheek to give her perfect ass a little lift. I couldn’t see the flaw that my brother did – but I really wasn’t looking.

“Do you have anything like that?” Ted asked the woman behind the counter. You would think a person working in a store would be shocked and dismayed by this question but the hippie-girl took it as if it were the most routine question.

“We do, but I won’t sell it to you,” she answered him coyly.

“What if I wanted to buy it for my cousin?” Conner was quick on the uptake and it was now fairly obvious the hippy cashier was enjoying herself at Ted’s annoyance for being excluded from shopping when no one else was.

“You can either use those elastic garters” she pointed to some elastic garters, “with straps that could be worn like crotch-less panties, or if you really want something effective – then the butt plugs on the wall would do.”

Up to this point Ted had been walking around the store shaking his head saying how we would go to Home Depot and buy clamps or the Pet store to buy things, because he said the store was too expensive and we could just make whatever we needed. He was just here to get ideas and buy a few things to sell at the pool tomorrow.

Then he saw the plugs and changed his mind. He called all four of us over and made us look at the wall. There were shiny-metal plugs, small rubber butt plugs, the kind you can attach to a wall and back into plugs, there were red-ones shaped like the Pope and Jesus even!

Ted found four that he thought would be perfect for us. “Don’t worry,” he assured us “This is coming out of my money, as a gift to you!” He quickly caveated that with, “Until we were done with bitch-training.” then he wanted them back clean! – for what reason, I was afraid to ask.

The matching butt-plugs were made of an amber-colored rubber and were shaped like a thumb. “This is Uncle Ted’s thumb up your ass telling you to keep your mind on your work and what you are learning.”

He kept hinting that “Uncle Ted’s thumb up our ass will be shocking but it’s worth it!” and that they were small but would pack a punch.

He insisted we put them in RIGHT now. Savannah laughed at the size of the thumb and asked out loud if it was also the size of Ted’s penis, but she quieted down when she saw he wasn’t amused. Ted wasn’t above spanking or swatting us immediately when he heard us forget to say Sir or if we rolled our eyes too much. I don’t think the pain scared Savannah as much as it bothered her to be brought down a peg by him.

The woman behind the counter coughed. “Should I have them go into the changing room?” he asked.

“One of you needs to pay for them,” she insisted impatiently. Ted sent me to the cashier with money to pay for the plugs that we’d soon be putting up our asses. She asked “Would you like to buy some anal-lube? Buy two tubs and get the third free!”

Ted scoffed at first saying spit and elbow grease would work just fine and then thought about it “You know what – go ahead and get them!” he was flush with cash and feeling like the big spender.

She ignored Ted’s request to buy the lube and waited for me to answer her. “Yes Ma’am, we’d like to get three tubs of the anal lube.”

I felt my knees buckle when I heard my own voice say that out loud. She rang me up and I brought the change back to Ted. Once the purchase was finalized the woman informed us that the butt-plugs came with a small tube of gel specifically designed for it.

Ted asked for his money back on the three large tubs of sex-gel we had bought – far more than we’d ever need.

“No refunds,” she announced with her nose in the air.

Ted bristled at her insistence but would not let her defeat him. He said we’d find “some use for it – maybe sell it by the handful.” He insisted we open the gel that came with the plugs and coat the butt plugs, but made it sound like he was doing us a solid favor.

The anal-lube smelled like coconut oil and was white and creamy. Crystal warmed it up in her hands before applying it liberally to the butt-plug. I did the same as my Aunt. Savannah used way more lube than she probably needed.

“You better save that shit,” Ted instructed her to conserve and not waste the lube.

“You gonna stick this up YOUR ass, Sir?” Savannah’s nostrils flared as she defiantly jabbed the plug up her ass right in front of him.

“How long do we have to wear these, Sir?” Crystal finished lubing hers up with her hand like a professional. She had her panties pulled to the side so she could slip it in with no problem. It popped right into place and the 2 inches on either side slid up the cleft of her butt-crack in either direction.

“You have to wear them all the time until Sunday. You can take them out when given permission to shit and fart. I am going to set times. You get supervised breaks, once before bed and when you wake up and you will go at 1pm and 4PM at the pool. If you need any other times to go, tough titty – you can beg for special spermission to drop a deuce.”

Ted told Lloyd and me to pull our skirts all the way down to our ankles so he could make sure we didn’t put them in half-way. “You will be checked at random and if you have farted them out half-way, then you will be punished and lose clothing privileges.”

I had lubed up the “Ted’s Thumb” sized butt plug and had it against my asshole when the little bell-rung in the store to alert to a new customer.

“Oh shit!” I said out loud – instead of thinking it.