Chapter Thirty-Three

A guy who shaves his legs and arms –probably shaves his vagina too.

The kiss was the absolute most..

The most average of kisses!

Ryan slipped a little tongue on my lips and held me tight but there was no magic, no explosive fireworks, no ringing of the bell.

I was coated in sweat and soapy-suds from working outside all day and hadn’t been allowed fresh deodorant in a while, but he held me tightly like he truly wanted me.

The problem was – I no longer wanted him. His kiss was sloppy and reminded me of a fish. I’ve had very few kisses and almost any of them happened here in the Buckman – but this ranked as the most ‘meh’.

It was simply boring and bland; and what made it most disappointing was – I had wanted to like this boy.

The crowd had shot their load watching Lloyd’s stunt and many of them were dispersing but new people were showing up. We had at least a dozen people still standing around.

Lloyd had a new fanbase of “Cougars” in their 40’s and 50’s who were waiting their turn to “Reward” him for finishing his stunt so effortlessly – at five dollars a kiss.

I heard someone tease us, “Ooh, the rich kids are falling in love!”

I wanted the kiss to be over. Ryan held it a little longer than it should have and when he broke the kiss – he sighed with pleasure and looked up at me like I had just given him the most cherished moment of his life.

“My first kiss!” he looked like he was floating on cloud nine. I smiled sweetly back at him but I felt nothing but pity for him that it had been with me.

Ted reminded him he would put it on his Uncle’s account.

“Put it in on your Uncle’s account?” O.J. challenged Ted, “Isn’t that what you always used to say?”

“Hey,” Ted was smiling, offering O.J. his share of the money, “I plan to have a nephew want to put things on my account one day soon!”

“Really?” O.J. sounded surprised at Ted’s sudden generosity.

“No,” Ted admitted. “Fuck that kid. He can get his own fucking Nintendo or whatever the fuck it is he wants.”

“It looks like you’ve gone off script here,” O.J. changed the subject back to business “What’s with the kissing booth?”

Ted answered, “That actually doesn’t sound like a bad idea but let me tell you about the Tub of Learning and how it works.”

I noticed out of my peripheral vision that my Aunt and Savannah were both engaged in kissing someone.

The Riggins brothers had pulled up in their big black monster truck. Tim was holding Savannah tightly and she had one leg lifted up and back as he held her in his arms.

Billy Riggins was holding my Aunt in his arms. She was still naked and had her arms and legs bound with the piggy tail, but the piggy nose had been removed. She had her massive tits pressed against the light flannel shirt he was wearing with no sleeves.

We all watched the girls give the two handsome teenagers their money’s worth on that kiss.

“We’ll nix the kissing booth idea,” Ted declared as a wave of jealousy washed over him. I don’t think he was as jealous of Crystal kissing Billy Riggins as he was humiliated from other people watching her openly enjoy it right in front of him.

“I like the idea,” O.J. said at the same time Ted said he would abandon the idea. “You have that Gaylord entrepreneur spirit. Senior is proud of you.”

“Senior knows about this?” Ted asked excitedly. I could only assume if Junior was top-dog in the trailer park and Ted’s Uncle, then Senior must be Junior’s father.

“I assume so,” O.J. shrugged. “Senior knows about everything that happens in the Buckman doesn’t he?”

I was given a short history of the Buckman from the Leaner at one point during the day. I don’t know how much to believe but the story goes like this:

In the 1950s and 1960s this area was booming. There was a quarry pit because there was so much construction. The Bitterman brothers were local land developers and they speculated heavily on land in this region.

Senior was a business partner and executive who initially started the Buckman as temporary homes for construction workers. He built a theme park, hotels, restaurants and the town pretty much sprang up around that.

The Buckman was eventually going to be torn down and replaced with permanent homes for his workers but that project got canceled when the expected Interstate never came this way as he had been told. He had been acting on inside information from his employer and when they found out – they let him invest heavily and ruined him financially.

The quarry and construction jobs dried up and the Buckman remained the trailer park it was now going to always be. Senior tried for a while to make the park a retirement community and a vacation destination but there was simply not enough out here for people to want to see and the interstate made it easier to go to places like Cherry Lawn (where the real land development netted them millions).

Senior did not remain idle. He would not let his former employers ruin him.

He became a miserly slum-lord who ruled the area with an iron-fist. He had a band of bikers who did his dirty work and they ran rough-shod over the Trailer park for years. Senior expanded the Buckman into multiple nearby trailer parks and absorbed them all. He owns several other parks in the area but the Buckman is by far the largest and most notorious.

There were entire streets that people simply didn’t go down unless they wanted to get robbed.

I asked the Leaner who would want to get robbed but he hushed me and continued his story.

“The schools, the water, the electricity – nothing in this area got down without Senior’s approval. He ran big brothels and strip clubs, drugs, gun-running, chop-shops to sell auto-parts. A guy could have his car stolen on Tuesday and then buy it back at one of Senior’s dealerships on Wednesday with a fresh paint-job, a tune-up and a new vin number.”

The Leaner stopped his story there. I asked “What happened then Sir?” but the Leaner just shrugged and said he didn’t know.

“What do you mean you don’t know Sir?” I asked again but the Leaner just stared creepily at me while leaning against his garbage can.

I told that story to you right then because that is about how long Crystal and Savannah’s kisses of the Riggins lasted.

“Oh yeah, we’re keeping that idea alright Sir,” Savannah wiped her mouth and adjusted her boobs before putting her chewing gum back in.

Crystal seemed stunned after her kiss concluded. She smiled at Billy Riggins and ran her fingers through his short brown hair. She asked if he wanted another but he smiled broadly and thanked her and said he came to see Lloyd.

My Aunt's arms and legs were not immobile, but the rubber bungee cord made it impossible for her to pull her arms apart to hug him back and it hobbled her foot steps.

My aunt got dressed without asking permission or waiting for someone to remove the rubber bindings and ate her well-earned Snickers bar while watching the Riggins asses in their tight-jeans as they walked over to where Lloyd was holding court.

“Damn,” the Riggins boys teased Lloyd. They were all about the same build and age; and while Tim was certainly the most handsome of the three – they were all good looking young men.

“I know,” Lloyd had just finished kissing a woman ten years older than his mother while fully erect and dripping wet in the nude.

“Jelly!” Billy slapped him a high five of congratulations. They were thoroughly impressed with Lloyd.

Ted commented on Lloyd’s hairlessness, “A guy who shaves his legs and arms –probably shaves his vagina too.”

I think Ted secretly wished he was as cool as Lloyd and guys like the Riggins brothers saw him as cool. I don’t know how big of a secret that is – it seems pretty obvious.

There is such a dichotomy between girls and guys. Kissing strange women and being made to perform stunts for guys brought adulation from his friends. We were considered tramps to be scorned by all the women-folk, who might have been jealous of the attention we were receiving on some level.

“Can we sign up for this too?” Tim turned to ask O.J. and Ted. This brought out a fresh wave of interest from the ladies waiting their turn from Lloyd and even some fresh smiles from the guys.

“We’ve got one too many hot-dogs on display as it is out here,” Ted shook his head no.

This time O.J. agreed with him and explained, “Lloyd is on punishment and while I am sure you boys did a thing or two wrong – this is Ted’s family thing. You want your truck washed though? I’ll give you half-price if you help wash it with your shirts off.”

The Riggins agreed and my Aunt and Savannah eagerly went back to work washing – starting their truck first. They looked like they were genuinely having fun at this point and both eagerly embraced washing the truck with the shirtless young studs.

Ryan had been awkwardly standing next to me the entire time, “I’ve got to get back to work – thank you for the kiss Sir.”

He looked at his sneakers as if I had just slapped him across the face. I kissed his cheek more out of pity that I might have hurt his feelings. He was a nice boy and whispered in his ear “I mean it – thank you, Sir. Are you coming to the mall with us tonight?”

He nodded he would and I joined my cousin and aunt splish-sploshing in the hose while the Riggins sprayed us down.

The rest of the afternoon went by quickly and was a bit of a blur. We did a few more challenges out of the barrel which were often very painfully humiliating and in some cases impossible. Ted was still tweaking the ideas that were in the barrel –adding and removing scraps of paper.

I ended up kissing about six more men before the day was over as well. Lloyd had found a niche in the kissing game – he spent most of his time doing it. Savannah and Crystal had voiced their support for kissing initially but the guys willing to pay for kisses after the first few were not exactly Casanova experts in the field of kissing.

Their breath smelled bad. I could taste the turkey and mayo sandwich a man had eaten and another man’s breath smelled so much of beer that I could barely open my mouth.

They usually expected me to explore their mouth with my tongue and I shuddered twice when I discovered the acrylic where their false-teeth ends and their real gums begin.

I would always smile afterwards and say “I’ve got to get back to work – thank you for the kiss Sir.”

The kisses were mediocre at best and disgusting at worst – but they weren’t that bad. The men would hug us close and try to cop a feel but that too was really not as bad once I had learned to expect it. I think what was disappointing to me was the very first kiss with Ryan had gone so poorly.

I wondered if I just kissed like a fish as well and maybe that is why he couldn’t impress me with his passion. I thought perhaps since it was his first kiss ever – maybe he just didn’t know how to do it and decided to chalk it up to inexperience.

I resigned myself to ask Ted to “make” me kiss Ryan while we were at the mall later that evening and give him another chance to redeem himself with me. I wanted to like Ryan but the more I thought about his kiss the more I could only see him as a good friend and that disappointed me for some reason that I could not quite put my finger on.

I think I wanted him to be the white knight from my familiar former-settings. He was from a different part of town but he was from the same demographic of people as me and he was HERE in the Buckman with me. He also LIKED me. Those things, when added up together, seemed like the formula to my mind for why we should probably date.

Then again – why would he date me after he saw the things I had to do? And heard the things I had to pretend I did to deserve this punishment.

I thought about that all the way home in the back of the golf-cart. Crystal, Savannah, Lloyd and I were all huddled together with our bare-asses hanging out the cart on our knees. Boogie was cheering and following us in his van.

Ted had stuffed our own swimsuits and underwear in our mouths to gag us all the way home. “I’ve heard enough of you and just want some silence. We’ll get this money split up and you’ll have thirty minutes to shit, shave, shower. I’ll pick out what you are going to wear at the mall!” Ted insisted.

Once we pulled up to the trailer on Glory Hill we were told we could go inside. It was broad day-light and if this was any other place than the Buckman we might have caused a scene launching our naked bodies out of the back of the golf-cart with our mouths full of our suits and our wrists tied together with plastic ties.

O.J. told me before letting me go inside that, “I have some bad news for you.” I immediately worried it was about something that may have happened to my father.

“You have to be on your best behavior at the mall because I am picking your mom and dad up on the way home from town. If you don’t want to be seen like this then you will have to behave your little ass off.”

He honked his tiny golf-cart horn at me, waved in the most jovial manner and left me standing next to the small trailer-park road in the nude with a bikini in my mouth and my wrists tied together as if that were the most normal thing in the world.

I was so stunned. My father was coming home – NOW? Why did it have to be now? Sunday would be so much better or better yet – MONDAY! I missed him and wondered what had happened to him, and I would have LOVED to talk to him on the phone – but he was going to eventually see me like this!

Even if I was a perfect little slut to delight Ted at the mall it would only postpone the inevitable. My mom and dad would learn what I’ve been doing all day – kissing men for money, letting them finger my bottom, spanking me, being judged in the ‘Best Asshole’ contest, and all number of wicked little games.

My mind raced with what he would think and what he would DO if he found out. He might rage and destroy the trailer and Ted, as if this was all his idea. I had volunteered to do this; and what happens when he learns that?

If I had been blackmailed or coerced against my will – at least I could claim innocence but I had been a willing participant and even enjoyed this at times. I certainly looked forward to my share of the money which I learned was about 800 dollars.

I was WISHING I had been blackmailed. That is a very surreal thought to have. It would make my reasons for doing this so much easier and less like I might just deserve the cum-uppance I’ve been getting.

I wondered if my father would instantly put a stop to it. A part of me thought he might just be so livid with me that he insisted I keep at it! That sounded absurd. My father is a very reasonable man and he would never support what we were doing – I just worry too much.

Then again – wasn’t it justified? If he is the reasonable man in all of this and he thinks its absolutely wrong – then wasn’t he going to just knock down the entire house of cards and probably never look at me the same way again?

I walked to the door of the trailer and had to struggle with the door. Nelly Jr. and Maw-Maw were waiting for us when we came inside. We were allowed to remove our gags and fold them neatly.

Ted had also given us permission to unroll the black rubber-rings from our nipples. “Thank god,” Savannah said, but I had forgotten they were even on there.

Until I had rolled mine off – oh it felt glorious. There was a feeling of such inescapable ecstasy that spread from my nipples to my brain and back to all parts of my body through my nervous system. I think even my armpits throbbed with joy. I thought I would orgasm right on the carpet and I shook a little bit as the blood returned to my engorged nipples.

“Damn Ellen,” Savannah teased me, “Nelly Jr.’s right here – you might want to save that for in private.”

“There is no private any longer here,” Ted insisted much more seriously while cutting Savannah’s wrist bindings with a knife. “You won the best asshole contest so you don’t have to keep your wrists bound for the ride up there.”

“Ted,” Crystal had her hands clasped together as if in prayer by the bindings “Sir” she continued. “You did a great job out there today – a really good one. We are all proud of you and we were really good sports about it all. I am not even mad that you kind of tricked me with that bet,” I had a feeling she was lying about not being mad and Ted probably suspected that too.

“Don’t forget though that this is just an act to make some money we’ve wanted for a long time. We’ll do what you say at the home – but you don’t need to be such a hard-ass on us here – nobody is watching- let’s save this for the audience.”

Ted considered her for a moment.

“Yeah you are the ring-master out there,” Savannah joked, “Just the ring master-bater in here.”

“Do you want your hands tied back up?” he shot back at her and she quickly stopped joking. We all were a little nervous – even Lloyd looked less oblivious than usual.

“You tell me to stop half-assing and scheming,” Ted cracked open a beer “Now you tell me when I get serious and stop being lazy about something that I cannot do it?”

“I didn’t quite say that Sir,” Crystal answered him submissively –searching for the words to explain.

“The rules at home aren’t hard to follow,” he shook his head at her and held up one grubby finger “One – I am the boss” he belched and added with his second finger, “Two- any questions?” then he dropped his first finger leaving only his middle finger upraised to add “Fuck you!”

“That’s the part I don’t understand, Sir,” oh why-oh-why-oh-why had I just opened my mouth and asked a question. I think Ted and Crystal would have worked this out but a detail had been bothering me all day today.

It was already out there and all eyes were on me.

“If this is to really be Bitch Training and there is structure and disciplines – then there are rules, defined rules.”

I explained how in football they know before they even set foot on the field if they are defending or on offense and what every position can do and cannot do. They know what is too rough and what is an acceptable tackle. They hit each other hard but they do so safely. They know what to do in cases where they have a tie and they don’t play it all by ear. They don’t just have a Ted standing on the side lines making it up as he goes. He doesn’t just scribble down plays in a play book and the rest of the team doesn’t know until they draw them.

Football as analogy seemed to hit home with Ted. He listened as I made my case more passionately and with every word I said I found myself growing more confident with my point.

“Today when we did that race. We could have lost nine thousand dollars. You could have told us that you were going to bet against us. What if we had won the race? Everything we did out there today would go to pay back everyone in the trailer park. We’d been squatting and doing deep-knee-bends for the Leaner for the next ten years to pay it off!”

“Hahah,” Savannah burst out in laughter, “The Leaner! I like that. He is always leaning against something and looking at us real creepy. He sort of lurks around all the time. Leaner is a good name for him.”

She let me continue my explanation that had we coordinated the bet then we would not have taken that chance.

“So you are saying that you’d cheat at a bet and throw the results in order to make money?” Crystal asked me with skepticism that I was this level of dishonest.

When she said it like that it sounded much worse. I was trying to say that we could have eliminated possible risk by making sure everyone knew what we were doing ahead of time and now I felt guilty for having brought it up.

“You might have more Danville blood in you than I thought!” she smiled at me and pinched my nipple with her hands bound together playfully.

“So you want a playbook?” Ted sounded skeptical that such a thing was possible. “You want me to be the coach and to teach you the plays. You want me to sit here and think up every possible rule on what you can and cannot do in training. How you are to eat, shit, shave, shower, walk, talk, what you are supposed to do when you have nothing to do at all.”

He made it sound like an insurmountable amount of tedious work and thinking. I shook my head that I didn’t and wanted to explain that I just wanted clearly defined rules, so that I knew whether I’d have to suck someone’s dick or not but I didn’t want to say that out loud. I didn’t want to put it in his head that it was kind of up to him now if I had to or not. He hadn’t pushed me that far – and maybe he didn’t’ feel he could. I stammered and tried to form a cohesive response.

“That would take a lot of work,” Ted shook his head lost in thought. He wasn’t listening to me “Catfish as my assistant coach and Conner here as my water boy –quick I need a fucking pen and a god-damned notebook.”

Maw-Maw told him, “Don’t forget the 5 'P' principle -- Proper Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance.”

“I know that Maw-Maw!” he hushed her. He was normally not as dismissive of his mother. “Uncle taught me that one since I was a baby. “The Three ups – show up, keep up and shut up too!”

“Well I just thought I’d help you,” Maw-Maw sounded offended and hurt.

“Maw-Maw,” he told her, “I Love you! But you can be an asshole sometimes.”

Her belly laugh caused ripples in her stomach and she told him he could too. “I’ll help you with this while you are at the mall but you need to return my hair-curlers.”

“Maw-Maw!” Ted had a box marked “Bich training stuff” in very crude marker and in poor handwriting/spelling. He reached in and pulled out a white tray with five-inch long plastic slender pink dildos that were clearly for curling hair. “I need these for the training!”

“You didn’t let anyone stick them up their asses did you?” she took the set of curlers and began sniffing them.

“No!” Ted assured her. “Lloyd just threw some in the pool and had to fish them out with his mouth.”

“Well if its only that then,” she looked at him like such a proud mother of a spoiled son “You should buy me a new set with all that money you made today.”

“I need to invest this money. I’ve got a lot of plans thanks to Ellen here – big plans; but yeah, if I can get you hair-rollers shaped like dicks then I will.” he quipped.

“They are shaped like that aren’t they?” she seemed to just notice. They were smooth and didn’t have a head and veins on them but it was hard not to see them as anything other than 32 plastic dildos.

Ted started scratching down ideas. He ignored the rest of us because he was clearly inspired to begin writing down his ideas. “We better get some say in this too Sir,” Crystal demanded while still standing there naked.

“You can use the toilet one at a time,” Ted announced saying that one of us can be showering while the other is pissing and shitting. “The door stays open and Conner you are the lookout. I don’t want them jerking off, playing with their tits, or farting around in there. They are to get it done – O.J. is going to be here in about 20 minutes. They need to be dried off and ready to go!

“Sucks to be you, Crackers!” Nelly Jr. puffed out his cute little cheeks and returned to coloring.

I stood looking at Conner and my cousins and Aunt as we thought about what had just happened.

“I call toilet first!” Lloyd abruptly dashed down the hallway in the nude with his hands still bound. Conner chased after Lloyd and told him he needed to get his ‘time tracking device’.

Savannah, Crystal, and I followed; I think because it seemed like we had little else choice in the matter. We could have demanded Ted free us and done what we wanted but he still had our cut of the money and we had technically agreed to this treatment. We walked down the hall to the bathroom awkwardly.

“One of you needs to get in the shower right now,” Conner demanded while checking his Nintendo DS. “Come on, come on.”

None of us wanted to do what he told us. His voice sounded so nasally and he seemed like such a worry-wort checking his hand-held gaming device as if our lives depended on precise timing.

“I’ll go,” I was the first to offer. Lloyd was farting on the toilet and laughing as I walked in.

“Don’t mind him,” Crystal looked amused as they watched Lloyd on the bowl “He’s been laughing at his own farts since he was four years old.”

I wasn’t allowed to close the shower curtain. I suppose I could have anyway – what could Conner have done? Gone and got Ted to come tell me to close it and maybe spank my ass?

I left it open and soaped myself up. I lathered my hair.

“Hey,” Savannah came to the sudden realization that I was going to use up all the hot-water, “I got next!”

Conner warned me I had only 2 minutes left and I would need to dry and get my hair combed before I could leave. It was difficult enough to shower with my wrists tied together and now I had an audience and a time limit!

“Can’t I dry while someone is in the shower, Sir?” I was skeptical we had to be that quickly timed.

“No doddling!” Conner sounded forceful and frustrated that we weren’t taking him seriously. “You get 5 minutes shower, inclusive of drying off, and 5 minutes on the toilet.”

That was that then.

I stopped the shower and stepped out of the steamy-hot water – smiling at my small victory over Savannah. “I think there is some left,” I said as I grabbed a towel and began drying off my body. I was bruised, sore, and suddenly more aware of how much I had endured today now that the water had opened up my pores.

“You bitch,” she started to walk into the bathroom to take my place in the shower.

“You’ll wait until your turn,” Conner put his arm out across her belly to stop her from crossing into the bathroom.

Savannah’s angelic blue eyes flared up like dragon fire but she smiled wistfully and said sweetly “Okay sir,” and waited her time. “If you hadn’t judged me best asshole today I might just have made you lick Lloyd’s asshole when he is done pumping turds on that porcelain throne of his.”

Lloyd was getting up and wiping his ass with toilet paper at that moment. He had to step through his arms so they were behind him so he could wipe himself. He bent over and mooned all of us “I don’t think you would have won if they saw mine.”

Savannah laughed, “You do have a pretty pink pooper, Sir.”

Conner demanded she not call Lloyd Sir. “He is one of you – you aren’t supposed to call him Sir.”

Savannah put her hands on her hips and looked at Conner in disbelief with a look of “Who do you think you are?”

“You spend all day boob-watching and staring at my asshole to the point you know it better than I do the streets of the Buckman and you are going to lecture on me what I can and cannot do?” her flippant attitude served to make my brother nervous enough to acquiesce to her.

He nodded at her and looked around nervously. I wanted to step in and defend him but I just let her play with him. The little shit had cut my 5 minutes of shower time short.

“I can call my brother turd-burglar or sir if I want too. You can’t tell me saying Sir isn’t showing respect,” she insisted.

“Let Conner be,” Crystal defended him “He is the good nephew who is going to give his Aunt a little lady-time in the bathroom to take care of a few things he probably does NOT want to see,” she rubbed under his chin.

Conner’s left leg was shaking rapidly. I know that shake – it’s the nervous leg syndrome that is your brain telling your leg you should probably get up and get the hell out of there.

Lloyd hopped in the shower while the three of them were talking. “Hey!!” Savannah stamped her foot.

“Okay – you can sit on the toilet now, Ellen,” Conner announced that my five minutes of preening and showering were up.

“I don’t actually have to go,” I told him. I hadn’t had to go all day and maybe it was because we had so little real food.

“You may not get a bathroom break at the mall,” Conner warned me, “You need to sit on the bowl for the full five minutes even if you don’t go.”

I stuck my nose up and bristled at him but he was right. I sat on the toilet and I started to feel the need to pee almost immediately but it was difficult with everyone watching me.

“Just fucking go,” Savannah impatiently folded her arms. She turned to Conner and ran her finger down his chest, “I’ll let you look right at my butthole if you give us more time.”

“Can’t,” Conner resisted my cousin’s charms without a second thought, “Besides I can see your butthole all the time. The way you stand – your cheeks don’t close all the way.”

Savannah looked behind her back as if she could see her own ass and smacked him on the shoulder.

“Heehee,” Crystal looked behind her daughter and giggled teasingly, “I never noticed that before. I guess you can’t close that box once it’s open like mine.” Crystal bounced up and down on her heels and let her ass shake.

“I can see yours too,” Conner corrected, which shut up my smiling Aunt. “When you walk the ass cheeks bounce together and then flap open, revealing it for just a few seconds, and then they bounce closed again. If you are standing still you cannot see it though.”

My Aunt took consolation in that and teased her daughter, “At least I am not ALWAYS open like you.”

“Now in the front,” Conner was about to explain whose pussy was widest and most open when the two of them protested his graphic explanation.

Ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

My piss hit the bowl and echoed in the bathroom at that exact moment.

“Oh Gawd, Ellen!” Savannah exclaimed with frustration at how intensely red I was turning and the face I was probably making of deep shame, “We all piss. It’s no fucking big deal.”

That is when the first fart happened.

– Frip –

A tiny little, almost musical, rip; that might have gone unnoticed if not for the four other people standing within a few feet of me and the vast emptiness of the low-flow toilet bowl in their trailer.

Lloyd was drying his ass by taking a towel and running it back and forth and humming to himself in the mirror. Savannah and Crystal were both teasing my brother and he was telling them to stop to no avail when it happened.

All four of them cracked up in hysterical laughter that made my ears turn red as I blushed and wished I could suck it back in.

The second fart couldn’t be contained and it was much louder and that is when the teasing began along with the laughing.

“Here Ellen sits broken hearted – five minutes to shit and only farted!” Lloyd was the first to make a rhyme.

“Holy Shit Ellen,” Savannah waved her hand in front of her nose while laughing, “You could bring tears to a fucking skunk,” and she fake gagged.

“Lloyd would you open a window and let the air from the garbage-dump next door come in please?” Crystal teased me as well.

Conner was quick to remind me I had used up half of my time and if I was going to have time to wipe I needed to finish soon.

“Guys!” I implored them to be nice, “I thought we were in this together! Be nice to me!”

I might have received more sympathy if the air passing out of my anus hadn’t erupted at that moment with a big blurp – they all giggled and laughed. Conner was especially amused. He used his Nintendo DS to take my picture because he said the look on my face was priceless.

“It was a look that combined disgust, shock, outrage, and yet at the same time derision for the rest of us.”

I didn’t know Nintendo DS could take pictures. I was hoping he was bluffing. “Don’t keep those pictures on there, Sir!”

“Why not?” Savannah laughed and reminded me that people had snapped cell phone pictures of my ass outside all afternoon.

She exposed an uncomfortable truth. I lied and said I didn’t want my mom and dad seeing the picture. That wasn’t entirely untrue – I did not want them to see it but there was more to it than that.

Savannah figured out I wasn’t telling the whole truth. “You are convinced you are going back to Cherry Lawn and you don’t want your fancy friends to see you slutting it up with your slutty cousin and Aunt isn’t that really it?”

The laughter stopped and I didn’t answer. I didn’t know what to say. I quietly wiped myself and left the bathroom with 20 seconds to spare.