Chapter Nineteen

If turds could fly they would be called burds

When lunch was over I was stuffed, but I also realized – I was over-embarrassed.

You know how when you feel over-tired you can't actually sleep? I think I came up with a new condition; where you are so embarrassed and humiliated, but because you don't have time to stop or think – you just carry on and power through it.

We had seven cars waiting for us and honking as well as a small crowd once the lunch was over. The cars that had to wait for very long became impatient and drove off and the crowd thinned out after the initial spectacle of our feeding was over – but there was now a buzz about us in the trailer park.

We spent the rest of the afternoon with very little break between washing. I could go into detail about each one – but it was all sort of a blur. The people's faces, the type of car, their personality, all different each time; but the format of the wash began to take a very familiar pattern:

The Introduction:

We would gleefully walk up and welcome the customer and admire their car. We would work into the conversation that we were on punishment and had to wash cars all day and that the profit was going to be used to pay the bills. We were always careful to make sure we explained that the water bill, phone bill, electricity and rent were all due – because I was told that occasionally a big spender might want to take care of one of those bills.

Since generous big-spenders were very rare in the Buckman – they would probably run in the same circle; and we wanted to keep our story as straight as possible if they compared notes.

The music was playing loud and we jumped around a lot – which only helped to get us noticed by other people who were driving into the trailer park.

We would offer to wash their car for the 'cost of materials' and a tip. Odd-Jobs had been right that keeping the price low got more customers interested and we were doing more of a volume business. He would rather 5 people leave because they were waiting too long than us wait for a few perverts with the money to pay more. His theory being they would probably come back later; and he was right.

The Compliment:

They would say something about how hot we were or comment on the lunch.

“If I had been there I would have dunked the hot dog in mustard and made you lick it off,” the Customer might say.

“If wishes were horses, then we would all be stepping in horse shit, Sir,” Savannah would be sassy and would bring them back to reality that they weren’t here or didn’t think to do it when they had a chance..

We would follow the rules – but as reluctantly as we could get away with. That way they saw that rules were being followed, but barely.

She was always constant in her role as a sassy little bitch. I tried different roles - the most popular were the naïve little rich girl who was just visiting, or the aloof and stuck-up little rich girl who was just visiting.

I think the fact that I was from some other world that many of them didn’t envy that they saw me as so different from them that they wanted to bring me down to their level. They thought rich people were stuck up and put on airs.

A customer, or as we called them behind their backs a “Trick”, asked me a question. He said, “You sure were wet when that guy used that hot dog and fed your cousin with it.”

I giggled and splashed him with water, “Now you are wet too, you big pervert!”

He accepted my response without another word!

My family was hardly rich by the standards of my old neighborhood – we were firmly middle-America, but by Buckman standards we lived in a mansion. Savannah would introduce me as being from “Cherry Lawn Estates where they have country clubs and golf courses.”

I don’t think anyone here had any interest in ever going to a country or a golf club, but I would say, “Yeah and I miss it too – I sure wish I didn’t have to live in this shit-hole.”

A person who lives here can say it is a shit-hole – but you better not be from a fancy-sounding ritzy place and say it is – that is all I can say about that.

The Brattitude:

While washing their car, we would slip in backwards insults-about how either they or their car looked. We would complain to our Aunt that we were tired or wanted to take a break. We would say that the bikini we had on was TOO small and she would say, ‘You should have thought about that before you snuck out in a diaper the night before.’

We were establishing that we were out here to pay the piper, but chafing at the bit – that we would not learn our lesson this way.

In Cherry Lawn Estates I assume people would probably call the police if they saw girls parading around like this to wash cars or cavorting at our community pool. Here the women looked on with scorn or envy; and the men agreed that the punishment fit the crime – and may not have gone far enough.

“That’s fine - this doesn’t bother me, Ma’am,” we’d pretend and splash each other/play-fighting as if we were really not learning a lesson; but were willing to patronize her and go along and complete the punishment.

The Sales Pitch:

My Aunt would get the trick to put lotion on her back or flirt with them. She tried to sneak off for ‘Premium wash jobs’; but there was simply too many customers for her to be gone long. She adjusted to that constant stimulation by alternating between the over-sexed and flirtatious but lazy MILF, to a woman who was in over-her head with bills and teenage girls who couldn’t be controlled.

The trick might also want to make us exercise or do something dirty – but my Aunt stuck to the same sales pitch she had with Shawn. That was just a tease to get them to take some money out of their wallet.

Once we wound up a guy enough – it was a very easy proposition to get on the subject of what they thought Crystal should do. In almost every case the guys answered that we needed an attitude adjustment and almost every time they were willing to pay ten bucks to give it to us.

Odd-Jobs had made the example that we had to be like the dunk-tank clown at a county fair. We had to be likeable enough that people wanted to sit and listen to our bullshit, priced low enough they wanted to take a shot – and give them the satisfaction of dunking us every now and then.

We’d act surprised and angry that we had to put up with the indignation, but after the fourth or fifth time – I was almost too eager to get it over with.

The Punishment:

We were spanked in the men’s bathroom, we were spanked in the backseat of cars, we were spanked over their knees at the pool deck and we were spanked bending over and putting our hands flat on the hood of the car.

We were paddled with the back of the car wash brush, the flat of their hands and even once with a phone book. We had to take down our bottoms and bare our asses a lot, but sometimes they didn’t even ask us to take down our bottoms because they were so small anyway. I will say this much -we showed our naked butt-cracks more times than we didn’t.

I would sometimes pretend that I was willing to get punished, only if they helped with the bills because we needed a home; and that would help seal the deal.

We had the odd finger jab in our butts or pussy – but for the most part – each man knew that he was being watched by Crystal and felt there was only so much he could get away with. It got to the point that I preferred the public punishment right in front of everyone, to the ones in the backseats of their car.

Each time we got a spanking – other customers would watch with googly eyes and inquire about what was happening and why we were behaving this way.

Crystal would tell them to get their car washed and she would make us tell them why we were on punishment.

Once we did, she would explain how the last punishment had clearly not taken hold. The men would often take this as a challenge to one-up the guy they just saw punish us and offer the money out of their own pocket to take a turn.

Then we would cycle and repeat this pattern like a smooth and efficient operation. The customers were almost exclusively men that ranged in age from teenagers to very, very old men. We subtly changed the format of this game – but the end result was the same – they walked away satisfied they had got one over on us; and we had their money.

We had rednecks, Mexicans, black guys, and everything in between come up and inquire about the car wash, but most of our tricks were white men. We had one guy who rode his bike up when he heard the rumor we were there and just paid to punish us – without the pretense of the car wash at all.

The questions and comments were often pretty routine, but I remember one old man tell Crystal he had a son that used to be unruly like this but he was now serving overseas.

“Oh, in the Marines?” Crystal asked with a hopeful tone that he would impart some wisdom on her about how to keep her girls in line.

“Nope.” The old man answered the same when she asked if it was the Army, Navy, Air Force, Coast Guard or National Guard.

“He is serving 10-20 for running drugs over in Istanbul,” the old man took a puff of his pipe as if he was proud and then spent twenty dollars to spank both of our bare bottoms with the flat of his hand.

He was a nice old man and I felt a little bad when Savannah told him he hit like her grandmother. That would be my grandmother too! He spent another ten dollars to try and prove her wrong; and Savannah was nice enough to yelp and pretend it stung much worse the second time around.

The key was to leave them satisfied enough they didn’t mind parting with their money, but give them a reason to keep spending it. They needed a sense of satisfaction once we had teased them enough.

My brother and Conner teased us, “Have fun getting your butts paddled.” They were off to some new worksite for Odd-jobs – having added chemicals to the pool to help burn off the remaining goop and gunk.

I waved and teased right back, “Have fun cleaning out the next septic tank or digging ditches then,” while Savannah and I splashed around in the sudsy water.

Odd-Job’s nephew Ryan was on the golf-cart and overheard me. He smiled at me and waved. His dark hair was well-groomed and cut short, and he had the look of another ‘rich kid’ from a ritzy area like I did; but he also seemed relatable – at least to me.

He exclaimed about what a courageous thing I was doing and how he had admired me earlier which made me think. I didn’t want to pat myself on the back here too much, about how noble this was – let’s be honest, I was engaging in a dirty-little game for cash and trading on my sexuality.

I think his approving look and smile did more to humiliate me in a different way than I wanted to admit. If he had been crude and laughed, the same way as pretty much everybody else in the Buckman did, I might not have thought about it so much. The fact that he saw what I was doing as something noble and worthy of his respect – made me embarrassed and ashamed in a different way than just showing my butthole to strangers did.

I felt like his approval and support was being given to me under false pretenses. He should at least say, “You should know better than to cavort around like this for money.” or maybe if he had said nothing at all.

His nodding and encouraging smile – made me more aware that what we were doing out here really was embarrassing.

Odd-Jobs or SS would ride by once an hour to check on us in the golf-cart –and how much money we were making. My brother and Conner weren’t always with them and they never stopped as long as we looked busy. They were just keeping an eye on us and making sure we knew they were. They wanted us to keep working cars and trucks like a production line.

Savannah seemed to thrive with the attention and the popularity this game of ours brought her. She became more confident after each trick paid his money to her mom for the privilege of punishing her.

There was one guy that Savannah later called a “Fucking white knight” once he was gone. He had told Crystal that she was being too harsh on us and offered to let Savannah and I come live with him instead. “You fucking pervert! I am only 16 years old? You want me to leave my momma and live with you?”

He paid ten bucks to Crystal essentially as an apology for even bringing it up once she had said that and didn’t punish us at all.

“Jackpot!” Crystal announced after he left and hid away money in the coffee can - sticking a little inside her bathing suit for safe-keeping after the paying customers were out of earshot. She had been told by Odd-jobs that he was going to let us keep every dime today – but she was just taking precautions.

The girls seemed to like the honest perverts much better who wanted to see tits and asses and watch them jiggle than they did someone who was a “White Knight”. I didn’t always understand their terminology or way of thinking and I asked for clarification. They called preening and dancing around for attention “sweet titty cheesecake” and they implied that any guy who protested it too much was ‘just a liar’.

The day had flown by and we were tired. We had sun and suds all afternoon and our butts were starting to get sore from the dozen or so spankings we had each received.

The cars were starting to slow down and a lull had set in where they started to become far more infrequent. Crystal told me that around 5 it would pick up but she was going to ask Odd-Jobs if we could knock off now and get ready to go to the mall like he had promised when he came back around.

Fifteen minutes later his golf-cart came wheeling around the corner of a white double-wide trailer. The trailers in the very front of the Buckman were all double-wide and far more expensive looking than most of them– I was told this was the premium space because people didn’t have as far to drive. It was also close to the community center and that was probably valuable years ago when the pool was fully operational.

All three of us waved him down and hopped up and down the way we had been flagging down potential customers. SS was sitting in the passenger seat and Ryan was in the back. My brother and Lloyd were hanging off the back. They were both shirtless and covered in mud, dried cement, paint, and looked exhausted.

I smiled at Lloyd and Conner because even though I had been run through the ringer – they looked like they had been worked hard themselves in a completely different way.

“You are up off your ass and jumping up and down,” Odd-Jobs parked his cart right next to us and observed of Crystal, “You must want something.”

“I just wanted to say hello and thank you for this opportunity is all,” Crystal lied sweetly.

“What is it you want?” Odd-Jobs wasn’t buying it and wanted Crystal to just come to the point.

“I was just thinking you could let us knock off early because there isn’t going to be a lot of cars until people start getting off work around 5pm.” Crystal asked him as sweetly as she could – without acknowledging he was right that she had been trying to butter him up.

“Sure,” Odd-Jobs told us. “You’ve done a fantastic job today!”

“Hell’s yeah!” Savannah promptly kicked over the dirty bucket of suds water and let out a hallelujah like sound of joy that she was done for the day. My Aunt began to pack up and since I hadn’t brought anything – I went over to collect the boom box.

“That will just be half of what you made today then,” Odd-Jobs announced after letting us start packing up.

“What?” Crystal turned on her heel to challenge him “You told us we keep everything we make today! I knew you were going to fuck us around!”

“That is if you finish out the day,” SS crossed his arms. SS spoke very quietly and seldomly – his deep and imposing voice stopped Crystal in her tracks.

“I thought you sluts wanted to earn today,” Odd-jobs explained that he was evaluating this as a long term business opportunity. “You have two choices – you can make things interesting for the next two hours and milk as much money as you can out of this thing to the very end, or you can stop now and give me half of your earnings and we are done.”

Savannah didn’t bother to answer him. She bent over and began filling the suds bucket up again. She already knew her mom wasn’t going to give up half the earnings they made.

“I don’t ever want to hear you say you think I am dishonest, or you thought I would fuck you over – is that understood Crystal?” Odd-Jobs realized when we started putting our stuff back in place that we had made our choice to stay.

“Yes it is, I am sorry,” Crystal didn’t return his gaze. She could be contrary and opinionated, but she acquiesced to him on this.

“Sorry doesn’t cut it,” Odd-jobs told her that everywhere he went today people were talking about the girls up at the pool. As news spread that the pool would soon be open again for swimming - the timing had been perfect for gossip to spread about us. He told us people were speculating about why we need all this money and how desperate you must be. They are having a good time talking their talk and we are set to make even more money tomorrow.

“We can milk this gravy train for as long as it pays out. If you undermine me loud enough right in front of people and say things like you just did then this entire job is at risk – you get that?”

“Preach on preacher man,” Crystal grinned and joked. Humor was far and away my aunt’s number one way of easing the tension and trying to offer a little levity when she was in a stressful position.

“I want you to answer with ‘Yes Sir’,” Odd-Jobs wasn’t smiling back.

“Oh god,” Crystal rolled her eyes, but when she saw he was serious she quickly said “Yes Sir.” It meant nothing to her to show respect any more than it had to Savannah to tack on the Sir to the guys we worked for today. She would patronize him if he wanted to be patronized.

“Not good enough,” Odd-Jobs told us. “The three of you get up against the wall of the community center with your asses facing the entrance of the park. Put your palms flat against the wall and keep your legs apart. I want your noses and tits pressed against the wall for fifteen minutes or until a car stops.”

“The game was I am the rule-maker who has to punish the girls but isn’t doing a good job of it,” Crystal explained without moving towards the community building. It was only twenty feet from the sidewalk that we were standing on and parallel to the front entrance of the park.

“And for the next fifteen minutes you are in time-out until you learn who is really the rule-maker in this game,” Odd-Jobs told her in no-uncertain terms. He instructed SS to go get her coffee can full of money and start counting out his cut if she didn’t get to where she needed to be with a quickness.

My Aunt huffed indignantly, but wasted no time walking straight to the wall. She told us to come on and get this over with.

My Aunt put her hands high above her head and leaned against the wall with her legs as far apart as she could manage them. She was going to stand in the most exaggerated pose as possible – to prove she wasn’t afraid of this consequence. She poked her ass out behind her and stuck it out while keeping her tits firmly pressed against the wall.

“Like this SIR?” Crystal looked over her shoulder at Odd-Jobs who wasn’t watching the three of us get into position.

“No, your nose is supposed to be against the wall – do it right and the time can start,” Odd-Jobs didn’t look up at my Aunt, but somehow he knew she wasn’t doing it right.

I stood with my legs shoulder-width apart and pressed my nose and tits to the wall while leaning against the flat of my hands just like I had been instructed. I wasn’t going to press the issue by trying to over-exaggerate the position or do less than instructed – I think that is my nature.

A thought ran through my mind, “What if my dad were on his way home after all these days he has been gone and this was the first thing he saw when he entered the Buckman?”

My dad had always told me when I was little that I had a “ski-nose” because it was sloped and pointy. He would run his finger along the bridge and pretend it was someone launching themselves off a ski-ramp. I suppose the fact it was pressed against the wall may have been subconsciously why I thought of my father.

I pushed my nose against the wall harder, as if that were somehow hiding my face. I had all day for the thought my father would see us out here to cross my mind, but now that things were slow and we weren’t moving around is when my brain chose to paint the mental image of him being so disappointed in me – or freaking out. I wasn’t sure what he’d do, but I doubt he would have acted the way Ryan did – with approval. Ryan’s approval came with an implied, “I would never do anything like that – but it’s cool that you will.”

“Hey Mom, I...” Lloyd was about to make a funny or snarky comment by the tone of his voice but his mother stopped him before he could finish.

“I don’t want to hear it right now Lloyd!” She had played the boss all day and had not counted on having to taste the medicine she had been dishing out to us. It really wasn’t bad compared to everything I had done so far. I had done jumping jacks while my tits literally bounced out of the swimming suit I had on and pulled my bottoms down around my ankles to let a man spank my butt in broad daylight at the community pool – this was easy.

I don’t know if it was the fact we weren’t getting paid for it, but I would venture a guess it had more to do with Crystal’s pride. She had been washing cars on a different day and had no problem flashing; and barely protested having to be inspected nude for the money she might be holding out on. I think today she had started to believe she really was the rule maker and she did not like the dressing down she was getting.

She was dropping 10 pegs of self-esteem and dignity, while Savannah and I were actually getting a little bit of a break – all things considered.

The fact that Lloyd was about to say something that was most likely making fun of the position she was in only added insult to injury and she didn’t want to hear it.

Odd-Jobs did.

“That is no way to talk to your betters,” Odd-Jobs told her to apologize. “While you have time on the wall you are going to show respect to everyone – including customers who might want the girls to wash their cars.”

I couldn’t hear my Aunt whisper something to herself but if I had to guess it was a colorful set of cuss-words that I may have had to go on google to look up the meaning of.

“I am sorry Lloyd Sir, I have had a long day of working. What were you about to tell me, please?” Crystal had proven to be an excellent actress and her honey-tone was dripping with sweetness and consideration. If you didn’t know she was completely disingenuous about what she just said – it would have sounded like a genuine apology.

Odd-Jobs did know.

“Lloyd, were you about to make fun of your mom being up against the wall like that?” O.J asked.

“Hell No, I was just going to say that if turds could fly they would be called burds.” I believed Lloyd had just thought of a funny joke to tell and was blurting it out. I had cut the music off on the boom-box when we thought we were done for the day and he was just cutting up during the awkward silence.

“Don’t you feel like an asshole now, Crystal?” O.J asked my Aunt.

She paused before answering, “Yes Sir, I do.”

“Lloyd hand me those O-ring rubber bands,” I couldn’t see O.J talking, but I knew he was asking my cousin for something off the golf-cart. I heard him walk over to my Aunt and tell her, “You can put these on for the duration of today. It might be a constant reminder to watch your tongue and think before you speak.”

My aunt paused but didn’t put up any resistance, “Yes Sir, thank you.”

Savannah stifled a giggle that I don’t think Odd-Jobs heard and if he had – then he overlooked it.

I didn’t have enough peripheral vision to see what was going on, but in interest of exposition I will tell you that my Aunt pulled her tits out of her one piece swimsuit and rolled two tiny, black rubber gaskets on each of her nipples.

She cooed with the same honeyed voice she had used earlier to deliver her apology.

I don’t think she enjoyed baring her breasts and then rolling on the rubber bands as instructed. “These feel good and they make my nipples jut out a little – I like it, sir.”

I think she just wanted a tiny victory over Odd-Jobs, who was trying to make her time on the wall as unpleasant and as uncomfortable as he could.

“Do you have a tinier set for Savannah and Ellen, sir?” my Aunt was graciously asking for us to have to put them on as well. “Would you like me to leave my tits out for the remainder of my time on the wall, Sir?”

“Yes we do,” Odd-Jobs sounded a little stifled by my Aunt’s agreeableness, “and yes you can.”

Odd-jobs had applied a little oil to two tiny black rubber bands that he handed me. “These should fit- try them on,” he waited for me to pull my bikini top to the side and roll them on my bare nipples. They only pinched a little – and I have to admit the swelling feeling wasn’t as unpleasant as I thought.

When it was Savannah’s turn I think Odd-jobs felt a little cheated by the fact that not only had none of us complained or fought him – we all left our tops pulled to the side so that the flesh of our rapidly-swelling and engorged nipples directly touched the brick of the community center.

“These certainly seem to be doing the trick,” O.J. ascribed our willingness to behave to the O-rings, but in my case I was just doing what my Aunt was doing. I was pretty sure she was actually robbing him of the joy of seeing her whine and beg since she knew she was going to have to endure it one way or another.

We quietly stood against the wall for what felt like thirty minutes, but I was told was only five minutes.

I listened to the sounds of my brother and cousin policing the pool area and doing some work – but I didn’t dare turn my head to see what O.J, SS, and his nephew were doing.

Then with my nose still stuck to the wall I heard a vehicle pull up to the sidewalk and O.J. announce “Ladies, we have a customer!”