The Family Feud III

Chapter Thirty-Six
“How much is that doggie in the window?”

STAR COUNT:
WENDY: 39
Get out of jail cards: 1
WHORE: 2,3,1,0,0
JAMIE: 47
Get out of jail cards: 1
WHORE: 4,3,1,0,0

If the world was perfect, it wouldn't be.

Yogi Berra

It was a sunny Saturday afternoon. The kind families look forward to for picnicking, boating and backyard barbeques.

The Taylor family pulled into the Pet-smart parking lot. The Taylor men seated comfortably in the front of Bill’s truck and the Taylor women on all fours in the back. Bill and Chris had chosen outfits suitable to display their sluts, short skirts and half-shirts with high heels.

“Sorry to interrupt your conversation back here, did you want me to wait until you finish?” Bill asked mockingly as he opened the gate to the back of his truck to let the girls out.

“No Sir, Sorry” Wendy and Jamie had been having one of their long introspective mother-daughter conversations. They quickly cut it short and followed Bill and Chris into the pet store.

Bill had come to the closest Petsmart, which just so happened to be in the shopping center closest to their home.

“Oh look honey, the Olive Garden.” Bill said patronizing his wife as he pointed out the restaurant she had dinner at the night before.

“Yes Sir, it is” Wendy wasn’t sure how to respond to her husband’s mocking, but in retrospect her answer sounded a little passive aggressive and implied “So what?”

She steeled herself for the slap to the ass that never came. Bill was in a grand mood today and nothing was getting him down. He still had at least a week of training his wife and daughter and things had progressed better than he could have anticipated. He had the little twat Cathy Griffin out of his hair and later today he would be showing off his beauties at the pool party.

He hadn’t gotten anything directly out of ‘date night’ and he didn’t get a thrill out of what Jamie did at the football game last night. He was determined today would be HIS day.

He had set up an all new custom gaming rig with a super-fast wireless router and he even had an iPAD. He wasn’t sure what he’d do with it, but it was his now and he’d probably play with it after he bored of playing with his wife and daughter. Which as it stood right now, they were still his favorite toys of all!

The Petsmart sells all sorts of supplies for fish, birds, dogs, cats, you name it. It is half the size of any grocery store and bright and cheerful employees are always ready to ask you if you needed help. It was just the perfect place to start out the morning’s humiliations.

“Ask that woman where the dog cages are, Cow Tits.” Bill knew the dog cages were probably in the area marked “Dog Cages” in the very back but he wanted to let his wife know that was one of the requirements.

Wendy complied and the store employee barely gave her a backwards glance at how she was dressed. She informed her where the dog cages were and went about her duties. The pudgy woman had to be in her early fifties with short dark hair in the customary blue smock that all Pet-smart employees were issued.

Bill felt a little denied by the lack of shock from the employee. He wanted an experience funnier, and more interesting like he had at the Best Buy when the girls were dancing to X-box Kinect and flashing shots on digital cameras under their skirts.

“Ask her if she can help us with the cages.” Bill instructed his wife and the employee followed them to the back wall where all manner of cages were.

“Hypothetically, What size cage would you say could fit two people?” Bill asked the employee.

She looked at him strangely and said, “Two people or two dogs?”

“Let’s say they are both, people and dogs.” Bill smirked at his inside joke as he looked directly at his wife.

“The biggest CRATE we have is 52’ inches, Sir.” The employee said with emphasis that they were called ‘crates’ instead of cages.

“Wow, where is Buford when I need him?” Bill asked rhetorically. “Anything else you can tell me about the crate?”

The employee didn’t seem to understand him. She shifted uncomfortably and shrugged as if waiting for a more specific question. She had obviously perfected the ideal balance between showing the least amount of interest while still appearing moderately helpful to the customer long ago as she demonstrated her mastery of that expression now.

“Okay, whatever, thanks.” Bill abruptly dismissed the employee and told his wife to pull down one of the 52 inch cages.

“Do you think you and your whore daughter can fit into one, or should I buy two to be on the safe side?” Bill asked her.

Wendy had the perfect opportunity to bring up checking to make sure the credit card had enough available balance after his recent shopping sprees in this question. She swallowed uneasily and said, “I think we could probably fit, Sir?” instead.

“Do we need the kind that has a padlock on it, so we can crate them when we leave the house?” Chris smirked.

“You know that’s not a half bad idea. We could leave newspaper down for them. I don’t think they sell cages with locks on them though. Dogs don’t generally lift the handles off their cage.”

“Well, Lassie might have.” Chris joked before adding “Is this in case Jamie gets suspended?”

“No, actually I have been planning to come here to get some things before you guys came up with your cunt stunt last night. I did a little checking and a lot of rubber chew toys, dog bowls, leashes and cages are much cheaper here than they would be at the adult store.”

“That was pretty fun going there last night. We should go back again.” Chris smiled while holding a conversation with his father that completely ignored the girls.

“Yeah, I was thinking a Taylor Family movie night next week.” Bill put his hands on his hips and looked at his wife struggling to hold the massive box the dog crate came in. “Would you like an opportunity to earn your stars and letters next week?”

“Yes Sir, an opportunity every day.” Wendy wasn’t kidding. The sooner she dug in and completed the agreement, the sooner the ordeal would be over.

“What about right now, can you think of a good dare for you and Ass Face to complete that is quick and might amuse me?”

Wendy preferred the guys coming up with their own dares. That way she was surprised and didn’t feel as culpable for what she was doing. She saw a sign, ‘Sign your disobedient dog up for discipline training - In-store sessions with just you, your dog, and the trainer.’. “You could sign us up for obedience training, Sir?” she guessed.

“Not a bad idea, not a bad idea.” Bill repeated as he rubbed his chin in thought. He didn’t see how her idea would work, but he decided it was best to look magnanimous as if considering it anyway. “Ass Face, what about you? Got anything? Remember we can reward you for being creative in ways you can amuse us.”

“It seemed like you were trying to make us look like sluts to that woman who was trying to help us. You could invite her back and we could ask her questions about the cage and dog treats. The goal would be to see who can ask the most daring questions without the woman actually leaving in disgust.” Jamie answered her father.

“Sort of like Jenga, except seeing who can stack the most humiliating answer on top of the last one. When the pile collapses you lose?” Chris was delighted by that idea.

Jamie smiled at her brother that he understood the game. “Yes, sort of like the way we’ve been doing for Mrs. Waxerman’s visits!”

Bill had never played Jenga but he had seen it on an episode of Friends or something. It is a party game where small wooden blocks are stacked up and a player takes one block from the bottom and places it precariously on the top. This is repeated until it falls over and someone yells “Jenga!”

Her father soberly reminded her. “And you’ll be doing humiliation Jenga when you visit her to mow her grass after we get home!!”

“Yes Sir” Jamie acknowledged him and looked at the floor. The game they played with Mrs. Waxerman also usually had painful consequences, like her patented Waxerman Tabasco Colonic ™. She wasn’t even sure she should be laughing at the reaction they got from the old woman. She seemed like a busy body gossip with a country upbringing who claimed to hate gossip but would sit right there and get you to tell her more. Her reactions had been hilarious but in the back of Jamie’s mind she felt a little guilty maybe they would give the old know-it-all a heart attack through shock.

“Your idea sounds fun… It sounds fun, but do you have something more cock sucky, as in showing your ass or licking some nuts?” Bill asked.

There weren’t any male employees on the floor and there were very few customers. It was still early morning and the store had only recently opened. “Unless they suck the dog’s nuts who are up for adoption, they’d have to lick ours.” Chris answered his father with amusement.

Chris’s off-color joke caused Jamie to wince and involuntarily do her ducklip response she is expressly forbidden to do. The lemony face she makes where she puckers her lips when she hears something weird or disgusting .

“Oh nice, Bestiality grosses you out, Sis?” Chris was pleased because he knew she was in for another punishment. The duck lip expression was specifically forbidden in the Taylor household.

“I am SO sorry, Sir!” Jamie was genuinely apologetic as she admitted, “You can’t turn on a computer without knowing about women with horses and stuff, but I mean that’s so extreme. I hope you were kidding, right?” Jamie was starting to have a mild panic attack as her mind raced ahead to the idea of what her Dad may want her to do next week if she has to live outside.

Bill chuckled, “Don’t panic sweet-meat. You don’t have to suck dog dicks in Petsmart.” He didn’t make any attempt to lower his voice, but there wasn’t anyone close by either. The aisles nearby were long storehouses of every kind of dog food, dog toy and dog chew known to man.

Jamie sighed an exasperated relief.

“You do however get an infraction for the duck lips. Now since we are at green alert in a public setting, I’ll have to check the old Taylor slide rule of what the appropriate punishment should be.” Bill pantomimed pressing buttons on an invisible handheld computer and said, “Ah, it says here that you will face away from me and get ten swats on your ass.”

Green alert was the families ‘natural’ state in the progression from yellow to red they were to become more discrete and circumspect about their protocol and discipline. Bill had made distinctions about public and private green alert

protocols, but having just introduced these new concepts he made sure to remind them at every opportunity what they meant. He felt the repetition would reinforce his structured discipline and he was right, it was working.

Bill waited for his daughter to react, which was apprehension but not complete dread. She accepted his decision without questioning it. He wondered how many other fathers of teenage girls could say the same with a sense of satisfaction.

“From both myself and your wonderful Brother who is taking time out of his day to make sure you have the supplies you need to be educated as a proper slut and productive member of society. So you will thank us afterwards.”

“Right here in the store, Sir?” Jamie was starting to look more suitably frightened. She wasn’t afraid of the twenty swats, but she was of being exposed and Bill would take that reaction.

“There isn’t anyone here, we are the only customers. You can take them now, or you can wait and I will administer them on your bare fat ass when that fellow, Brad is it? Brad Jenkins comes by.” Bill could tell by the surprised look on his daughter’s face that she was shocked he knew about her crush.

Jamie wasn’t sure what to say, she looked at her mom for guidance.

“Don’t look at that fat cow to tell you what to do. Don’t you think you should be punished when you make ugly faces that you were forbidden to make? How else will you learn?” Bill asked his daughter patiently.

“Yes Sir, I do. I just don’t want to go to jail.”

“You went topless in front of the entire high school last night; this is an empty store; what the hell is the difference?” Bill asked frustrated.

“It was dark and I had on latex paint, but I understand Sir.” She faced away from her father, lifted her skirt to bear her ass for whoever would punish her first. The girls were expected to ask for punishment when they are disobedient. “Please punish me for making duck lips, in a way that will remind me not to keep making the same mistakes, Sir.”

Bill and Chris had not given the girls an opportunity to put on chastity belts this morning. They were still getting used to the new rules that had been laid down the night before. It had actually just slipped their mind until they loaded them into the truck.

Bill hadn’t completely changed inside of a week but he was getting better at adapting to things and planning ahead. He had decided in times when they have to wear bikinis, or it wouldn’t make sense for them to wear the chastity belts they would have certain protections that simulated what the chastity belt would provide. He wouldn’t finger his daughter or make her sit on a cucumber or anything like that.

However, he was fully intent on it if he offered her the chastity belt and she refused it. That had seemed like a good compromise to him as he evolved his rules.

Bill waited as Chris delivered ten firm ass-jiggling swats to his sister’s ass. She counted out every one of them and thanked him while she held her denim mini skirt up so her ass was a good target. Chris delighted in her discomfort “Ah, I just love the change in the shades of the ass. It’s like the change of summer to fall, turning pink, orange and then beet red.”

When it was Bill’s turn he added, “Yellow or Purple works too.” as he laid ten swats into his daughter’s already reddened ass cheeks.

The woman who had helped them to the dog crates earlier surprised them by walking around the corner just as Bill was finishing. “Can I help you?” she said while implying quite the opposite.

“Can you teach my daughter not to make that duck lip expression?”

The sales woman smiled politely, but said nothing.

An awkward pause followed. The disaffected employee arched an eyebrow but failed to register shock or outrage. She stood there as if to imply, “You’ve had your fun, now go.”

Wendy was the first to break the silence. “I am sorry you had to see that, Ma’am. My husband had to discipline my daughter for inappropriate behavior.” She offered cautiously.

The heavy-set middle aged employee only shrugged passively, “If you’ve picked out the crate you want, do you want me to bring that to the cash register for you?” she said in an ambivalent tone like she could care less.

“No, but thank you for the kind offer, Ma’am. I think my husband and son may want to pick out some collars for us. Can you direct us to them?” Wendy answered by instinct.

The woman pointed to the collars which were only a few feet away from the girls as if that should have been obvious. The Dog aisle had been purposely placed in the center of the store and stocked with almost everything a pet owner could need.

Jamie assumed her mom was doing the humiliation Jenga game she had mentioned earlier. That would have shocked her a little if she hadn’t voluntarily set herself up to be punished in front of the Pooper Snooper boys earlier by playing along with Chris. She had said “Shit” which the boys expected them to be punished for, even though it wasn’t a word they would be punished for ordinarily, they were actually expected to say it.

“Do you think this pink collar would fit me, Sir?” Jamie played along too. She held up a much larger pink dog collar with rhinestones to her neck and turned to address her brother.

“Hmmm, do you think it would be comfortable if you are outside all day?” Chris answered with a smirk. He wasn’t sure what was going on but he liked it.

“Should it be comfortable, Sir?” Jamie asked him, before looking at the disinterested store associate and asking if she minded if she tried it on.

The associate shrugged and Jamie looked back at her father and Chris for permission to remove the nappy cat collar that she had worn since her education began. It had been through a lot of punishment with her and was already falling apart. She felt a strangeness as she unclicked the familiar neck ribbon and took it off, as if a weight had been lifted off of her but at the same time, a security blanket had been pulled from her.

She modeled the new thicker collar for her father and brother and they approved.

Wendy piped up less cautiously than before but still in a reserved manner “Would you like me to have a matching one, Sir?” she reached for another of the pink leather collars.

“I don’t know, do you think Jerry would like it?” Bill said without any reservation. The employee wasn’t reacting but she was getting off on the girl’s reactions and couldn’t hide her prideful smile.

“What about Steve, Sir?” Wendy said as she unclasped her own worn out collar and put on the thicker pink one.

“I thought I told you, but maybe you forgot. Jerry will be your handler from now on, Steve is out. I had a long conversation with him after he dropped you off for a date with his son. It seems you left without giving him a proper goodbye?”

Wendy remembered things a lot differently. Sheldon had led her away as Jerry began bickering with his wife. It was obvious to her that he had felt betrayed after putting all his life and love into his ex-wife and she was now with a guy he felt inadequate to compete with.

“I am so Sorry, Sir. That was completely thoughtless of me. I should have waited to thank Jerry properly. I am so glad I have you to remind me not to be so completely insensitive and uncaring about others.” Wendy’s unexpected playing along delighted both Bill and Chris. It came as a much bigger surprise when she turned to the sales associate and asked if she minded if her husband punished her, “If he doesn’t do it right now while it’s fresh on his mind, it may not sink in and I’ll keep making that same mistake, Ma’am”

The woman sighed and looked around – the store was empty of other customers and employees. “I don’t know”. Her answer was neither approving nor disapproving the request.

Wendy took that for a yes, and faced away from her husband while thanking her as if she had given permission to go ahead. She lifted her skirt and displayed her well striped and well-rounded ass for her son and Bill. “Please punish me for my thoughtlessness, Sir.”

Bill obliged cheerfully, as did Chris. They laid into Wendy’s ass much harder and with a much more satisfying slap than they had Jamie and she counted out each one as they did. Jamie made a polite apologetic face to the employee who remained with a disapproving but generally uncaring look.

“You are going to also ask Jerry to punish you first thing Monday morning, because it was him who you offended, do you understand?” Bill asked while pulling his wife’s hair for affect as she let her skirt drop.

“Yes Sir.”

“Do you people even have a Dog?” the employee asked skeptically.

“We have three house pets, the other one is Roscoe and he is in his dog house back home.” Bill explained.

“Sir, do you think that Dog house would be big enough for me?”

“Why, did you want to try one out here and see if we need a larger one?”

“Do we have time, Sir? I know you want to get us home so you can apply our corrections and then prepare us for the pool party?” Jamie’s answer made Bill and Chris’s smiles even wider. They looked at the employee and back at Jamie and nodded.

“Do you want me to join her, so she can see what it’s like with Roscoe in the dog house, Sir?” Wendy offered now sounding more playful.

Bill had yet to register that the girls were playing humiliation Jenga for his benefit, but he was already making a mental note that they were earning letters if not stars with their behavior. He pointed to the back wall where the prefabricated doghouses were stacked up and the girls sauntered over with the employee standing right behind them.

“Get in Mom, get comfortable. If you ever have a sick day, you can spend the afternoon with Roscoe too.”

Wendy smiled at her son and answered, “I don’t think your father is ever going to permit a sick day, he likes the change in attitude when I get home from work.” as she and her and daughter bent down on all fours to enter one of the display doghouses.

“Can you turn around in there?” Bill asked with his hands on his knees watching his two girls squirm around together inside the dog house.

“I think so, if Mom’s ass wasn’t so big!” Jamie’s toothy grin could be seen even in the dark recess of the back of the doghouse.

“Hey, that’s not nice! Ass Face.” Wendy gave her daughter a friendly slap as the two turned to poke their heads back out like a double-headed turtle emerging from its shell.

“I liked you better the other way, with your giant asses sticking out.” Chris fist bumped his dad before saying, “Hey mom, go fetch.” He threw a plastic rubber dog toy he had picked up in the aisle and his mom dutifully ran after it on all fours to get it with her teeth before bringing it back to him.

“Good, but slow.” He looked at the employee who was now raising her eyebrows. Her previous sullen expression being replaced by a mixture of “W”, “T” and “F” with emphasis on the “F”.

He patted his mom on the head as he threw the same toy a little bit harder for Jamie. She leapt out of the doghouse determined to one-up her mom in this friendly game of humiliation Jenga, bounding hand over foot on all fours towards the red rubber bone that went tumbling down the tiled store aisle.

The metaphorical Jenga board was wobbling and teetering to near collapse. They could all see the store employee had tolerated them with a look like, “You’d really discipline your wife and daughter in a pet store?” expression. She had run the “dis” gamut from disinterest, to disbelief, to disgust. She would soon be finding it “disturbing” and if there was a word for ‘dis-get-thrown-out-of-Petsmart-and-told-never-to-come-back’ they may have saw that too.

Chris was just asking the sales lady if he could make dog tags with ‘Ass Face’ and ‘Cow Tits’ and their address and phone number on them. “In case, they get lost someone might bring them home.” as he heard a noise. The electronic door to the store swished open and a small bell intoned that they could hear all the way in the back of the store because it was so quiet.

Jamie was bent on both knees with her mouth wide open playfully clutching at the rubber bone. It had been designed for snouted mouths not the petite and precious lips of a former high school cheerleader. She couldn’t quite get hold of it. She was turning her head to look back at her parents and brother and say “Gross, mom you got spit all over it” and ask permission to pick it up with her fingers when she heard the door swish open.

The dog aisle they were in just so happened to give a perfect view of who was walking in the store. That meant if they could see the door, whoever was at the door could see her. They would have a perfect opportunity to catch Jamie red-handed on all fours vainly attempting to pick up the rubber bone.

Jamie would have even continued with her game of fetch. It was a store in her neighborhood and it was likely someone she knew might even be the customer, but she was lost in the game. She was already embarrassing herself for this store clerk to amuse her dad and brother. She may as well add one more customer.

She had just managed after several attempts to get the red rubber dog bone in her mouth, but she let it fall out and clatter on the highly polished store floor when she realized who was walking in the store.