Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
 Story codes: mf, inc, reluc, viol, caution

   Jessie had already started wiping down the booths at the deli for the
night and was filling the saltshakers when two of Sean's friends showed up
at the store.  Not just two of his friends, Casey and Charlie.

   "Guys, I'm tired, I'm starving, I need to get home," she warned, not
bothering to point out the newly clean tables.

   "We're just here to hang out," said Casey, as if she should have known.
Sean was going to show up soon to give her a ride home, and the two of
them...  well, whenever they showed up they said they were just waiting for
Sean.

   "Grab a mop then," she said.

   They took off their coats and threw them on the front table.

   "Take off your coats, guys, stay a while."

   "I heard you're getting the high grade in English by 7 points," Charlie
said in a smarmy tone.

   "Fuckin a.  Who told you that, Sean?"

   "Simkin was telling us all about it."

   "How thoughtful," Jessie said, reaching for her lighter.  No reason even
to bother complaining about Mrs.  Simkin and her weird idea that Jessie was
her protege.  They would never pay any mind.

   "Shit, you can smoke in here?"

   "Yeah, we just have to be over by the tables."

   "Is it just you tonight?"

   "What does it look like?"

   "Good, then give us everything you got in the register," said Charlie.

   "You are such a funny guy, Charlie, did anyone ever tell you that?" said
Jessie, making sure not to show a reaction.

   Casey laughed drily at Charlie.

   "Fuckers," she thought.  Though maybe Casey wasn't that bad.  No, he was
so much worse.  They followed her over to the table and sat down at the
booth with her, Charlie next to her and Casey across from them.

   "You going to prom?"

   "Um, no."

   "Why not?" he said, faking concern.  "Can I see your lighter for a
minute?"

   "You have all my lighters.  I'm not into dances.  And no one's into me.
Makes it kinda boring."

   "Maybe if you would talk to people more," said Casey, pulling a pack of
matches from the edge of his box of Marlboro Lights.

   "Yeah, cuz that's worked real well so far."

   She realized that wasn't quite the right thing to say.

   "Hey, Jessie, dear, could I please get a coke?"

   "Fine."

   "Can I get one too, please, Jessie?"

   "Fine.  Let's all have one.  Fuck it.  Glasses are next to the machine."

   They looked at her.

   "What?  I'm smoking."

   Was that going too far?  Damn, it was still at least half an hour before
Sean was done with practice.

   "Give me a minute," she capitulated.

   Casey and Charlie started talking to eachother about Sean's new (used)
truck he managed to buy cheap from his boss at the shop.

   Jessie finished her cig, put it out in the already clean ashtray, and
got the drinks.  She finished her coke and wiped down everything again
except the booth where Casey and Charlie were sitting, and did the mopping.
That would have to be good enough for tonight.  Then she went to work in
back.

   There was stuff that still needed to be put in the freezers.  And there
was all kinds of prep work to do.  Plus she had to make sandwiches for her
and Sean.  Shit, why had she put it off for so long?

   She had all the containers out of the fridge and on the counter in the
prep area when she felt arms around her squeezing her.

   "Fucking Charlie.  What the fuck are you doing?"

   He laughed.  "What are you doing?  Stealing from work?"

   "No," she said instinctively.  "What the hell?  Get the fuck out of
here."

   "Who's going to be the one to finally warm you up, huh?"

   "Ugh," said Jessie, and writhed in an attempt to avoid his mouth as he
planted a kiss on her cheek.  "Casey, get in here, what the fuck is your
stupid friend tryna do to me?" she yelled.  She felt something cold between
her legs.  He'd managed to get his hand down there and the skin on his
fingers was thick she could barely tell what they were.  She tried to
scream and couldn't.  He removed his hand lightning quick just before Casey
walked in.

   "Aw, is this guy giving you shit?"

   The more she said, the more they would both think they could get away
with.  "Yeah, you guys can't be back here.  Sean doesn't like it either,
you might wanna know."

   "Did you ever tell him about us, hon?"

   "Fuck you.  Casey, don't listen to this guy, he's out of his mind. 
Guys, really, get out of here."

   "C'mon Case, let's go.  This bitch is no fun."

   Charlie walked out of the kitchen, jolting open the swinging door.

   Casey looked at her for a second, then followed.

   "He acts like it's my fault Charlie does those things.  Who is he
jealous of?  All of us," thought Jessie.  "That kid follows Charlie around
like he's a dog."

   She finished making the sandwiches and slipped them in her backpack
behind the counter.  She peaked over to the tables when she did it. 
Charlie was looking back at her.  She pretended not to notice, not wanting
to tip him off that what she was doing wasn't normal, and to give him the
satisfaction of a reaction, and took her backpack into the restroom to go
change out of her work clothes.

   As soon as she was in the stall, she heard the outer door open.

   "Give me some and I won't tell them you're stealing," he said
flippantly.

   "You know what?  You're in the fucking women's bathroom.  I'll tell them
how you are."

   "My father's best friends with Jim, you know that."

   Jim was the owner.  "Yeah, and maybe Jim's got more sense than to listen
to you over me."

   "Has he figured out how you are messing with the books to get away with
it?"

   "Ooh, wow, you're a fucking genius Charlie.  I should suck your dick
right now." She stood on the toilet to scope him out, threw a shoe at him
and missed.

   "You bitch, you threw a shoe at me."

   Jessie tried to hide her fear.  "Um, you deserved it." She yelled for
Casey, even knowing he wouldn't be able to hear all the way to the back and
through the doors, not with the fucking music he was playing out there on
the jukebox.  Knob.

   "I'm not gonna leave."

   "I'll just wait for Sean."

   "You'll lose your job.  You guys won't get no more free dinners."

   "Why are you doing this?"

   "Because you're a cold, stuck up bitch.  You think you're better than
me? Remember when you were little I used to come over to see Sean and you'd
always be looking at me.  Remember what we did that one time?"

   This was getting serious.  "Don't panic," she thought.  "You mean what
YOU did.  Yeah, it was pretty unattractive."

   "You calling my 8-inch dick unattractive?"

   "No, your 8-second ride."

   "Fuck you, bitch."

   He walked over to the stall and kicked at the door.  Jessie felt a lump
in her throat.  First she was just stunned, then started to cry.

   "I'll tell Sean about that.  He'll cut your dick off and hang it from
the mirror of his truck."

   "Go ahead and tell him.  I'm sure he would love to know.  You guys might
have a little lovers' quarrel."

   He crouched and looked under the door.

   "You're not actually going to--" The bottom was high enough.

   She grabbed her backpack, opened the door and attempted to kick him in
the crotch.  She got him, too.  She was halfway out the door when he
grabbed her backpack.  The evidence.  She grappled with him and he pulled
her back in.  The door slammed shut again.  She screamed in pain from the
way he grabbed her wrists and twisted her arms.  She was crying again.  He
threw her backpack across the room and it hit the inside wall and slid to
the floor.

   Then, before she could react, he turned and slammed her against the
wall. Her head hit the marble.  She was able to push him away.  He lifted
her and threw her on the marble counter.  She felt unable to move or speak.
He slapped her.  Worked his cold hand up her thigh again and into her.  He
was so strong she was afraid to struggle or he would hurt her inside.

   He pulled his hand out violently and started to kiss her.  Her head was
slammed against the wall.  She saw him struggling with his other hand.  She
could have kicked him again, but for a second she thought of Jim, and Sean.

   She shivered as her skirt fell back against her thighs and she felt him
force herself into her.  There were more tears.  His hands were on her
hips, pushing her onto him.  She felt nauseous.  He was slamming her so
hard she was barely touching the countertop.

   "You think you're better than me, bitch?  You think you and your fucking
all-star brother are better than me, you brown-nose bitch?  You're both
still afraid of your daddy giving you a beating.  You just love your
brother so much, don't you?  And he protects his little sister.  But it's
me you like, isn't it?"

   She felt herself relax.

   "That's right, get wet.  You can't get enough of this, can you?" His
voice was getting shakier.  "You love this." He kissed her again without
stopping.  His mouth made its way from her mouth to her neck.

   She tried making a little sound to see how he would react.  He didn't
say anything.  She tightened her thighs around him.

   "Yeah?" he asked, in a shaky whisper.

   "Yeah."

   She sat up and put her arms around his neck.

   He stopped.  "Do you want me?"

   "Yes."

   "Say it."

   "I want you."

   He started again, slowly.  "It's me."

   "You're the only one."

   "I'm the best."

   "You're the best."

   He started fucking her at full force again.  She felt him quiver and
there was a hot throbbing inside her.

   It set her off; she dug her nails into him and squealed.

   She kissed his neck.  They didn't move for a second.  She started to
feel cold again.

   "Get out of here," she said.  "Sean's going to be here."

   He held her and looked into her eyes with a smirk.  "All right. 
Remember, though, you're really mine." He fumbled with his clothes, zipped
up, and left.

   Jessie collected her backpack and her shoe.  Nothing to do now but go
back to the business at hand.  Back in the stall, she stood and strained to
force his goo out of her again.  She was hurting.  She was 16, tiny,
skinny, but resilient.  She was all right.  She wouldn't have said no to a
drink, though.  She changed out of her waitress's uniform, came out of the
stall to wash herself up in the sink, and put on jeans with the sweater she
had been wearing over her uniform.  Looked at her self in the mirror.  It
was still the same Jessie.  She had a lot more life in her than this, she
told herself.  Someday she was going to get the fuck out of here and have a
life.

   The three of them were waiting at the booth when she came out again.

   Sean didn't look pleased.

   Jessie sat next to him in the truck, while the others squeezed in back
behind the seats.  Once they had been dropped off at a house where some
freshman girl was having a party, he asked her if they had given her any
trouble.

   "Just the usual, you know," she said nonchalantly.

   "Good.  If either one of those fuckers ever touches you, they know
they're dead.  And if anyone else messes with you, you tell me.  Do you
promise?"

   "Yes."

   "Say you promise."

   "I promise."

   "Good.  Keep your mind on your schoolwork."

   They stopped in the parking lot of WalMart and ate their sandwiches. 
Neither one of them mentioned how hungry they were.  In fact, there was no
conversation, as usual.  Their meals were a silent communion.

   When they got back home, Dad was already passed out on the couch, or
almost.  He was deliriously yelling at the wall.  Sean took the bottle out
of his lolling hand and set it on the table.  Then he went out and split
wood.  Jessie went to the upstairs bathroom and watched him through the
window as he lined the logs up and split them.  "Strong as an ox," she
thought, and cried a little more.  She looked in the nearly empty medicine
cabinet and found a couple of Dad's pills sitting on the bottom shelf,
which she promptly washed down by drinking tap water out of her hand.  She
undressed an inspected the bruises.  Not bad.  She never did bruise easily.
She would be wearing long sleeves for a while anyhow.  Then she stepped
into a hot shower and listened to the water.  For a little while, it felt
like she was in a trance.

   It took a lot of work to keep going.

   She made the bed in the front bedroom with the dormers, carefully
layering the many wool blankets.  She heard Sean kick open the creaky door
downstairs and went down to help with the firewood.  They threw a few more
logs on the fire and went upstairs.  In the bedroom, Sean took off his coat
and threw off his layers of clothes.  He was still sweating from working
outside.  She kissed his shoulders from behind as he sat on the edge of the
bed taking off his boots.

   "I already took my shower."

   "Why did you do that?"

   "I have my period."

   "Already?"

   "Shit, that's what I said." He'd been keeping track for four years now,
paying more attention to it than she practically did.  But sometimes it was
irregular.

   "You going to be warm enough in here alone?"

   "Yeah, don't worry."

   She climbed into bed and this time listened to the water from the other
room.  She felt her eyes getting moist again.

   Sean came back a few minutes later and climbed into bed with her.  "Did
you need any help with your homework?" she asked him.  "Taken care of," he
said.

   They curled into their usual positions, with his arms around her.  He
held her in a strong embrace and kissed her.

   "Are you alright?  You seem faraway tonight."

   "I'm fine.  I'm tired.  I love you, Sean.  I love you so much."

   "I love you, Jess."

   "We're going to get eachother out of here."

   He squeezed her hand.  "That's right, babe."
   Another day over with.  Another Maine winter almost through.