Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
 Title: Raising My Precious Alicia
Author: Airimis
Keywords: Mg, pedo, cons, inc, seduction,
Summary: A father explains his side of the story as he raises his
daughter in a life where sex is a normal way of life.  This contains years
0 to 14.
Warning: This piece contains adult material and sexual contact between
an adult and a minor.  If you have any problems with this, DO NOT READ
THIS! This FICTIONAL story is for entertainment only.  Anyone considering
any actions like this in real life should seek professional help.  Children
are precious and need to remain that way.

   Chapter One - The Present

   Alicia walks in the room in her light blue camisole and white panties
on. This is normal sleep wear for the fourteen-year-old, but in most houses
it would be taboo for a parent to let her walk around the house in this. 
Her long blonde hair is dry from her shower and brushed as she climbs into
my recliner with me.

   I think I hear my recliner groan as her weight is added to mine.  When
we cuddle or mess around, we usually do it on the couch.  I sit in the
recliner when I'm not in the mood to do much.  You'd think that with an
alluring young girl walking around like this, I would be at half mast all
the time, but over the years I have learned to have a tactical advantage
over the girl.

   I put my arm around her and she snuggles in close to me.  Her hand goes
down the bulge in my shorts and starts caressing the outline of my member.
Her fingers feel like silk stroking me, but I show no change as I run my
fingers through her soft hair and continue to watch television.  It's
almost her bedtime and scenes like this are very common.

   "Will you give it to me?" Alicia asks tentatively after a few moments of
trying to massage me above my clothes.

   I shake my head keeping my eyes on the television.  It's not that I'm
not turned on.  Having a teenager with a beautiful young body ask for sex
is a dream come true, but it was all about the game of it.

   "Please Daddy.  You can do whatever you want," she pleads.  "I'll make
sure it's good for you." she begs and I look at her blue eyes screaming
with lust.

   Okay, for the record, I am the worse parent ever!  I know that and have
come to terms with it.  I have no illusions that someday karma or God or
whatever balancing force there is in the universe is going to send me to
hell or the equivalent.

   I am the worst kind of monster.  I'm the one that you don't see.  I'm
the Dad who attends all the school functions and his daughter loves more
than anything.  She doesn't feel abused, depressed, or sad.  She is my
willing sex slave and loves every moment of it.  She is a very happy child
and feels special connection to me.  She thinks that other girls who don't
have this with their dads are the neglected ones and will never truly know
the love of their fathers.  She believes that she was put on this earth to
make me happy in every way possible.  She believes that sex is wonderful
and would do anything to have it with me.

   Also, I am her best friend.  From the time she could talk, she has been
telling me everything.  I can tell you who her friends were at preschool,
what kids were mean to her, which teachers smell weird at her school and
the secrets to picking outfits that only girls know.  She talks openly with
me and has always considered me to be her best friend that she can come to
with anything.  I would like to think that we would have been this close
without any sexual contact, but my friends who have kids don't seem to
share the bond that I have with my precious Alicia.

   The fathers that come home drunk and rape their daughters are obvious
monsters.  The ones who beat their wives and terrorize their families
through violence are horrific, but I believe I'm worse.  I control her,
have sex with her at my whim, and she thanks me for it.  I have no doubt
I'm a monster, but I'll explain how things got this way.

   While I was growing up, I had a good life.  I had good parents.  I'm not
the kind of person who blames everything in life on their childhood or when
they didn't win the championship game or whatnot.  My little sister, Trish,
and I were raised well.  My parents were well off, but we weren't rich or
anything.

   Trish was two years younger than I, but always full of drama.  She
always had to be the main attraction.  When I would get anything or any
kind of attention, she would do whatever she could to get the focus on her.
When I joined the marching band in school and my parents started coming to
the rehearsals and performances, she joined the dance squad so that they
would have to go to them as well.  She would throw a tantrum if they ever
picked me over her for anything.

   This created a wedge between us.  I wasn't really in competition for our
parents' attention, but she was, and would do whatever she could to keep
the focus on her.  She started going out of her way to make me look bad
whenever she could and when that didn't work, she would get attention from
anyone who would give it to her.

   She started going out with the lower end of the male gene pool just
because they would put up with her crap.  She was with several abusive
boyfriends and quickly found that drugs were fun as well.  From then on,
the bond between us as siblings was severed.

   I didn't understand it fully until I took some college classes on
behavior disorders and psychology.  I knew it was too late to really help
my sister, but I did feel bad after learning about disorders.  I came to
terms that she was going to be who she chose to be even if it was someone
hooked on drugs and with whoever would give her the attention she craved. I
felt sorry for her, but I knew there was nothing I could do.



   Our parents died in a car accident when I was twenty-two.  It was
horrible, but we each have our own ways of dealing with it.  My sister's
way of dealing with it was to get pregnant.  I had hope that she was going
to take a life turn to the good.  Maybe having a child and the death of our
parents would be the kick in the pants for her to mature and settle down.

   No such luck.  I started talking to her for the first time in years and
tried to keep her clean during the pregnancy.  She even stayed at my house
for most of it.  Come to find out, it was only because the guy (or guys in
her case) that she was sleeping with tossed her out because he was claiming
it wasn't his.  She didn't have access to drugs because they were all
supplied to her by her boyfriends.  I put up with her stealing a little
cash here and there in the house, but I knew she was doing it.  I had some
to spare, but it made her think she was getting away with something so I
let her.

   She had a beautiful baby girl that I was so in love with from the moment
I first saw her.  To celebrate, Trish went out to get high on meth and pain
pills leaving her daughter in the hospital.  I kicked myself for being so
stupid to think that she would change.  I brought Alicia home from the
hospital to a nursery room that I had already prepared for her at my house.
I had planned to let my sister stay there until she got on her feet, but I
found out immediately that she would rather be high with her boyfriends
than be a mother.

   From that point on, I hated her.  I had always thought I would love her
no matter what she did or bad choices that she made, but I drew the line at
walking away from her daughter.  I made some calls and because I was a
blood relative the paperwork was surprisingly easy.  Three weeks later when
she turned up under the disguise of seeing her daughter and she asked me
for money.  She had been stealing money from me for months so I knew it was
coming.  This time I had an offer for her.

   I offered her five hundred dollars to sign over all parental rights to
her child to me.  She did so without hesitation.  She even made a smart ass
comment as she was leaving about that I was a sucker and that she wouldn't
take the baby back no matter how much I paid her.

   From then on, I didn't consider myself to have a sister.  I couldn't
process how she had grown into such a horrible human being who didn't care
about herself, me, or Alicia.  So I chose not to worry one more moment
about her and instead devote every ounce of energy to making sure that
Alicia never turned out like her.

   The last I heard of Trish she had went to Chicago with one of her
friends, but that was about ten years ago now.

   Chapter 2 - New Parent Issues

   Now I was thrust into being a mom and dad by myself.  I had several
girlfriends over the years, but college and work had taken their toll on my
relationships and at that point I was single and had a good job.  Due to my
parents passing, the life insurance had landed me a decent sized bank
account.  While my sister had partied and squandered her half on drugs,
booze, and sex, I invested mine and after a few years, those investments
paid off well.

   I was able to take some time off work and do some work from home.  Sleep
was another matter all together.  Alicia was a horrible sleeper.  She would
cry all the time.  I was desperate to find a way to calm her so that she
would sleep through the night.  I would get only a few hours at a time. 
After three weeks I was getting ready to pull my hair out.  The doctors had
checked her and said there wasn't anything wrong.  When I would hold her,
she would be fine, but as soon as I laid her down, she wouldn't be long
before she was crying again.  I would let her cry; I sang to her, I did
everything I could think of.  I was considering drugging her to sleep with
baby Benadryl, when I came across something....different....on the
internet.

   It was something I had never considered, but being a new parent and at
my wits end for sleep, I was willing to try anything.  I had read that
stroking that outside of the baby's vaginal area had a calming effect on
girls.  Now it wasn't fingering them, or any penetration, but the warm
rubbing of the area could cause micro orgasms for a baby and help them
relax.

   I didn't care at this point, and with how I had seen my sister with
drugs, I didn't want to go with the pharmaceutical answer unless absolutely
necessary.  The first time I tried it, she calmed at once and I could see
her eyes focus on me as I did it.  In about ten minutes she was so calm
that she drifted off to sleep as I barely ran my finger along the outside
of her tiny slit.

   And no, I did not get sexually aroused by it in any way.  I thought the
entire idea was insane, but it worked like magic.  It was my first night of
solid five hours of rest in weeks.  It didn't take long until that was the
routine before putting her down to sleep and she wouldn't sleep without it.
There was something about it that made her calm and she would always be
looking at me with those beautiful blue big blue eyes.

   After she grew up a little bit, she refused to sleep in her own bed and
insisted she slept with me.  I had a huge bed and it was big enough for
both of us so I didn't mind her cuddling up to me as I drifted off to
sleep. Sometimes she would be restless and she would pull off her diaper
and place my hand between her legs indicating that she wanted to be petted.
I did it out of habit.  Every once in a while I would have a sexual
thought, but I always kept it to myself.  I never once penetrated her or
touched her out of lust.  She had the same calm look to her each time I did
it.  She would look at me with those angel eyes and a warm smile as I
touched her.  I knew what I was doing was wrong, but she was so content
when I did it.  I figured I would put a stop to it later, but make her
happy for now.

   When she was five, she was still asking me to massage her baby-slit on a
regular basis.  She was a happy five-year-old.  I had her in day care for a
while.  She was just starting kindergarten when we had a talk and I told
her it had to stop.  She cried like I had just taken her best friend away.
She had sobbed and seemed depressed for two days before I gave in when she
came to my bed naked.  She begged me to rub her slit and make her feel
better.  She had tears in her eyes and pulled my hand down to her pouty
hairless lips.

   "Please Daddy," she begged.  "I'm sorry if I was bad.  I'll be better,"
she cried.  She kneeled on the bed above my hand and pulled it up to just
feel the brush of my fingertips on her puffy lips.

   I explained that some people would say it was bad for me to touch her
this way.  She swore on the life of SpongeBob that she would never tell
anyone.  She would do anything if only I would continue to massage her at
night.  I cursed myself because I knew that I had started this and gave in.

   That night I took it a step farther.  Another reason that I had wanted
to call it all off was the fact that I was more often getting aroused by
touching her.  Up until this point, I had never made her do anything or
made her pleasure me.  I had always worn shorts to bed.  I might go to bed
with a hard-on or wait for her to drift off to sleep and masturbate quietly
beside her.

   This night, I had her lay her back against me.  He legs spread naturally
to me as my hand slowly traveled down her stomach to her hairless waiting
lips.  I began stroking her slit from the top to the small valley that was
her undeveloped vaginal entrance.  Considering how sensitive she has always
been and that her body reacted quickly to my touch and started lubricating
immediately.

   I figured she would be a squirter when she got older, but for now, her
juices had wonderful properties of being very slippery and had an aroma
that was intoxicating.  In moments, the room would smell of her innocents.
I have no other word to describe it and there really is no way to convey it
fully.  If you had to have a smell that would cause men instant hard-ons,
she would be it.  It was unmistakable.  I learned to love that smell and
detect it from her anytime she got aroused over the years, even when she
was fully clothed.

   I started to concentrate my effort on the small nub that was her
clitoris.  Usually I would just stroke her and rub my fingers along the
outside.  It would get her turned on.  She would enjoy the good feelings
and relax until she fell asleep.  Tonight, I wanted to see how much
enjoyment I could actually cause her.

   I felt her tense as she continued to get worked up from the attention my
finger was giving her clit.  "Daddy," she said as her breathing got faster.

   "Yes, Baby?" I said as if nothing was different.  "Do you want me to
stop?"

   "No, Daddy," she said unsure.  After a few more minutes of heavy
breathing on her part, she arched her back and her legs shot out in
different directions.  "Aaaaaieeee!  Oh, Daddy!" she cried through her
first orgasm.  She was sopping wet and her little clit was throbbing as I
slowly stroked it while she came down from her climax.

   I was grinning from ear to ear.  My shorts could barely contain my own
sexual organ and I could see a spot of pre-cum on the front of them.  I
didn't know how young a girl could be before she could orgasm, but I was
happy to be able to cause her pleasure.

   She took deep breaths as I wiped away the sweat from her fore head. 
"Thank you, Daddy," she whispered as she rolled over to me spent from her
first orgasm.  "I won't ever tell," she said as she drifted to sleep with a
smile on her face.

   Chapter 3 - Rules

   I knew that I was in for trouble the next night when she came to my
bedroom asking for more of the same.  She eagerly looked forward to me
masturbating her every night.  For the most part, I delivered and gave her
at least one orgasm a night for years.

   There were a few guidelines that I had to work on with her to make sure
that I didn't go to jail or worse.  The first rule was that this was our
secret.  I told her that some people did this just like we did, but it
wasn't proper in society to talk about it or come out with it.  If it was
ever found out, then we would be separated and she would never see me again
(which was true for the most part).  This also meant that if ever she or I
had company over, that we couldn't do any sexual stuff.

   The second rule came into place when I heard her casually ask across the
breakfast table if I was going to give her sex that night.  Now when she
said the word "sex" at this time, she had no idea what real sex was.  She
had never touched my penis or anyone else's that I knew of.  I was just
bringing her to orgasm almost every night before she slept.  She would
complain that she couldn't sleep if I didn't and keep waking me up until I
did.  But she referred to it as "sex" for the first time and I knew that if
she slipped and said that in front of someone, there would be too many
questions about how a five year old even knew the word sex, let alone what
part of the body that it involved.  So we decided that the actual word
"sex" was off limits.  With that, over the years I taught her that much of
the terminology wasn't supposed to be said, either.  That way it would
minimize accidently referring to "My Daddy is diddling me" or "I play with
my pussy all the time." It paid off in the long run.

   The third was that there was a time and place for it.  I could tell
through the day that she would be aroused.  I caught her from time to time
trying to touch herself or she would move my hand to her lap under the
disguise of holding my hand.  I could feel her press my hand onto her
crotch above her clothes.  I figured that this would get us caught
eventually, so I had to put a stop to it unless we were totally alone.  For
her to touch herself anywhere other than the privacy of our home was
punishable.

   I had caught her absentmindedly rubbing herself at the movie theatre
once and had to pull her hands away.  It wasn't even the motion that caught
my attention, but I could smell her arousal from the seat beside her
because I knew the scent so well.  She wasn't uncovered or anything, but
she had her little hand beneath her skirt just enjoying Toy Story like any
other kid.  I drilled it into her that doing anything in public would have
bad consequences.

   That night, because of she wanted to argue that she wasn't doing
anything wrong at the movie theatre; I decided to send her to bed without
masturbating her.  I just gave her a hug and kiss like I did every night
and sent her to bed.  She was wearing her long night shirt as normal
without underwear.  She waited for me to tell her how and where I wanted
her so that I could touch her, and I simply told her no, that since she had
broken one of my rules that I didn't want to make her cum tonight.

   I could see the tears well up in her as she realized I really wasn't
going to touch her baby pussy tonight.  I told her to go to bed and she
reluctantly obeyed.  I felt a little bad.  It was cruel to get her so use
to her nightly orgasms and then deny her a release.  I went to her room
about fifteen minutes later.

   I found her furiously rubbing her slit and writhing on her bed.  I could
tell she was close, but getting frustrated.  I did something then without
thinking that had major ramifications in years to come.  I casually stood
in the door and she looked over at me with her finger shaking against her
little clit.

   I was still a little mad about having the argument with her earlier and
wanted my punishment to really sink in.  I casually remarked, "It's not
going to work like that.  I have to do it to really make you cum.  You can
try and you might even be able to make a fake orgasm, but I have to be the
one to give you a real one."

   I could see the need in her eyes as she let out a groan of frustration.
I casually walked a few steps out of view in the hallway and listened.  I
heard her try for another minute, maybe two more and then a huge sigh of
frustration and she started to cry as she was denied.

   I could barely contain myself.  It had worked.  As long as I buried that
idea deep in her head, she wouldn't be trying to masturbate herself, and
she would have to come to me for release.  I had the ultimate punishment to
hold over her head, at least for a while.  I wasn't casual with this
punishment, either.  It wasn't like if she got a bad grade on a test I
would tell her she would have to go without.  The only reasons I would use
this punishment was for a sexual offense.  If she slipped and accidently
refer to sex or if I caught her rubbing herself in public.

   And it did work.  She confessed to me years later that she had tried
many times to make herself orgasm and never could.  She told me that I was
the only one who ever made her feel that way.  I never told her about the
Jedi mind trick that was responsible for it.  It turned me on to no end
that she came to me night after night craving the orgasm that she could
have done herself if I hadn't stopped her the first time.

   Chapter 4 - Alicia Five to Eight

   My next development with her was in at her kindergarten Christmas party.
I mentioned that I was the kind of Dad that attended all the school
functions and I did then as well.  I loved her and she loved me.  Every
night, she just loved me to do other things for her as well.

   Things were going well until they all opened their presents that they
had gotten each other.  One of the boys in her class had gotten something
better than her.  I can't even remember what it was, but she was upset that
all the other kids were talking about his present and wanting to play with
it.  It wasn't an issue until her best friend joined the crowd around the
boy in her class and I saw the look that she gave her friend.

   My mouth dropped open as I saw my sister so clearly in her.  It was like
Trish was miniaturized.  My cute little girl, without knowing her mother,
had the same jealous look about her that I had seen when I was growing up.
That bothered me a lot.

   I saw that the anger in her eyes when her friend wanted to play with the
little boy and I couldn't stop myself.  I pulled her out into the hallway
and had to remind myself that I was talking to Alicia and not Trish.  I
told her that she wasn't to be mad at her friend or the other boy.  She
should be happy for them that they were happy and it wasn't all about her.

   I could see that she didn't understand all of it, but knew that I was
serious about something so she went with it.  She went in and was back to
being only precious Alicia again.

   I couldn't believe the traits I hated in my sister just flashed through
my daughter.  I know that they say certain things are passed down, but I
wasn't going to let her turn out that way.  From then on, I watched for
signs in her and did my best to squash them anytime they were apparent.  I
know that Alicia didn't understand when I would get onto her about little
stuff like being mad that she wasn't in first place, but I believed it
would be in her best interest.

   Over the years, I seemed to have taught her not to be jealous of others
getting attention with one exception: me.

   That was one that I couldn't seem to make a dent it.  Starting at
kindergarten, whenever any of the other kids would get my attention, she
would have issues.  Kids aren't wired like adults.  Sometimes they don't
know why they are doing stuff.  They don't even realize what is causing
them issues, but they know that something isn't right.  How do you teach an
only child how to share their parent's attention?  I'll let you know if I
ever figure that one out (and I'll be rich selling the book on Amazon as
well).

   In years to come, anyone (child or girlfriend) who got some of my
attention was instantly her enemy.  She learned to hide it decently for a
while, but eventually she would slip and I would catch it.

   I feel in that way, I really have failed her.  I tried so hard for her
not to turn into Trish and in that way, but she did.  For that reason, I am
glad that I don't have any other children so far.

   But, back to Alicia's childhood:

   At eight, she was still sleeping with me.  I would masturbate her and
she would curl up with me and go to sleep peacefully.  By this time, I was
good at it and knew what she liked.

   Occasionally, I would have her in different positions.  Her being on her
back wasn't bad, but I experimented a little to see if there were things
that she liked better.

   We were wrestling one night in the bed tickling each other when I had
gotten her over my lap and her night shirt rose up showing her cute little
bottom.  I put one hand between her thighs and her legs opened on their own
to me.  I started stroking the outside of her still hairless slit and she
stopped her attempts to tickle me.  In moments, I heard her moan.  I had
her cumming multiple orgasms in no time.  She rotated her pelvis naturally
and ended up grinding on my hard member beneath her.

   Most nights, she would end up sitting on my lap in some fashion.  I
never had to ask her to spread her legs for me.  One night she thought she
would tease me by closing her legs to me while we were watching television
on the couch.  I immediately stopped touching her and went back to idly
stroking her hair and watching television.  After seeing that I wasn't
going to continue to attempt to touch her, she popped her legs wide apart.
I still didn't go for the bait.  She then pulled my hand down between her
legs for me to continue and I smiled at her to let her know that I was only
teasing her.



   One night, during summer vacation, I thought she was asleep.  We lay in
bed and she had already been taken care of for the night.  I was in bed
with her just a few feet away from me.  Television had been boring and I
was particularly aroused.  Usually, I would find a way to masturbate at
least every other day.  I loved to make her climax and had grown to fight
my own hormones as well.  I never got tired of listening to her moans of
ecstasy and watching her cute little toes curl for her big ones.  It had
been good for her that night.  She had three major orgasms before I slowed
down on her.  She was growing in stamina.  I had no idea what a woman's
maximum could be, or if there was even a limit to it in adults.  A good
night for her at this point was three and she would be asleep shortly
afterward.  I thought she was firmly asleep when I turned the television
off, checked to see if she was asleep, and then removed my member from my
shorts and started stroking it.

   I will say, at this point, yes, I was very attracted to the tiny blonde
sleeping beside me, but no, I had not made her pleasure me in any way.  I
had not touched her against her will or used her for my own enjoyment. 
Anytime I had seen or touched her, I filed every detail away in my brain to
be used for a later masturbation session alone.  I would concentrate on
giving her the pleasure that she wanted and not my own desires.  She was my
precious Alicia and I wouldn't chance losing control and accidently hurting
her.

   I don't know how long I had been stroking hard dick in the dim light of
my lamp.  I had my eyes closed when I suddenly felt soft fingers touch my
leg.  I froze and my eyes snapped open to see my small eight-year-old girl
with her hand reaching to touch my dick.

   She didn't look up at my face, but I could see her wide blue eyes glued
to my swollen member standing up away from my body.  I actually hadn't
planned on this, but I probably should have with as much as I had already
done with her.

   She gently pulled my hand off of my dick as she sat up to get closer to
look at it.  "Daddy?" she said.

   I resisted the urge to pull the covers over me and hide my nakedness. 
It wasn't that I was embarrassed, but my pleasure had always been private.
We shared her pleasure, but I kept mine hidden from her.  I never wanted to
lose control even for a second and risk touching her in a way that would
hurt her.  "Yes, Baby," I answered.

   "Do you....cum....  like I do?" she asked.  I knew why she hesitated on
the word.  It was one of our off limit words that was punishable, but on
this occasion I let it slide.

   I decided that now that she was seeing me, there really wasn't a good
reason to lie to her.  "Yes.  Guys do orgasm similar to girls, but instead
of rubbing inside of you, it's done by rubbing like this." With that, I
wrapped my hand around my dick and stroked it several times from base to
tip slowly for her.  "Also, we squeeze it around the tip some."

   Her eyes were wide soaking up all this information.

   I explained testicles and how a man's cum shoots out when he does orgasm
to her.  I didn't stroke myself much other than to stay hard for her.  I
figured that my chance to orgasm had gone, but at least she would get some
answers.

   "Can I try to make you feel good?" she asked.  She was using words that
we used in place of orgasm and cum this time.  I knew exactly what she
meant by it.

   "I don't think that would be such a great idea, Baby," I said actually
concerned for her.  As much as my sex drive cried out yes, I was thinking
that this had to be one of the worst ideas up until this point.

   Her face turned to me for the first time since she had seen my penis on
display.  "Please Daddy," she said with pleading eyes.  "I want to do this
for you.  You do it for me every night.  Please let me try."

   What little resolve I did have crumbled and I cursed myself once more
for not having more will power against an eight-year-old and my raging
hormones.  I guided her hands around my hard cock and showed her how to
stroke me up and down.

   That night, she didn't make me orgasm.  I let her try for a bit and she
really put some effort into it.  After her arms seemed to get tired, I took
over and let her watch.  I finished myself and let her see the streams of
gooey white seed fly into the air landing on my stomach.

   After that night, she started getting obsessed with my cock and my
orgasms.  I denied her at first.  I had good self control, but after a week
of her begging to watch me again, I let her.

   Then our routine changed.  She asked to see me so often that I started
to forgo with clothing for sleep all together.  When I did sleep naked, she
did as well.  We would wear night clothing around the house before bed, but
shed it before climbing into bed.  Most of the time, she would try to
masturbate me for a while.  I would then take over to speed the process up
and she would watch me orgasm.  Then I would turn my attention to her and
make her cum several times before we would both go to sleep happy with each
other.

   She started reaching over and holding my dick while she climaxed.  I
could feel the energy and waves of pleasure from her when she would hold
and stroke my member.  There is no better turn on than having a young girl
hold and squeeze your dick as she hits her height of pleasure.  Then she
would stroke me softly until she fell asleep.  There were years that she
would fall asleep with her hand around my dick.  I don't know how to
describe it, but she wanted to touch it.  She knew it gave me pleasure and
that was enough for her.

   A month after the discovering of my dick, she actually made me orgasm
without help.  She was so proud and kept smiling even though she had her
little face above my dick when the first stream shot out and a small glob
of it landed on her chin.  During any of our sessions, I was still very
careful with her.  I might brush my hand over her flat chest and the small
puffy mounds that would one day become breasts.  I would run the smooth
curves of her legs, but I wouldn't touch her mound or vaginal lips when she
would try make me orgasm.

   I had the fear that I might hurt her in a moment of lust or accidently
press at her vaginal entrance that I had dreamed about so much.  I had no
idea if I would really take her cherry some day, but I let my mind play
with the idea.  I had no intentions of having intercourse with her.  That
was going to be saved for her and the one that she chose to give to:
hopefully a successful young man on their wedding night that treated her
like a princess.

   Chapter 5 - Dating

   This became common place practice at my house.  Sometimes in the middle
of a Saturday or Sunday, she might come to me wanting me to pleasure her,
but mostly it stayed to night time.

   I also had a few other things that got to be common place.

   Her bedroom was off limits to sex.  She had a bed in there, her toys, a
television, and all her stuff, but I made it clear that I wouldn't do
anything sexual in there.  I imagined an invisible shield at her door. 
That idea I learned from the research about sex and psychology.  I wanted
her to be happy.  She needed security and I figured her room should be
somewhere that she knew that nothing could happen in.  And with that being
said, she probably chose to sleep in her bed twice a year.  Those two times
were usually my choice because I might have been under the weather and
didn't want to give it to her, or I was working late and had a babysitter
there.  She didn't seem to understand why I wouldn't touch her on her bed,
but she accepted it.

   The other idea that she understood was the impression that I gave her
that I didn't need sexual release.  I never forced it on her or coerced
her, even though she got very good at taking care of me.  She did it
because she wanted to and wanted me to be proud of her.  I told her over
and over that she didn't have to do it if she didn't want to and that I
would be proud of her either way, but she was insistent on taking care of
my needs.

   When Alicia was ten and I started seeing Rachel, a girl that I had met
online.  Rachel was very nice and we had met for dinner a few times. 
Alicia didn't seem to like her, even though Rachel was a nice person and
tried to include my ten year old on several outings.  Alicia would put
herself between us and tried to make sure that I was holding her hand
rather than Rachel's.  I saw the little details, but mostly I started to
get irritated at Alicia.  She would get upset with me when I would put my
arm around Rachel or flirt with her in almost any way.  At this point,
Rachel and I were just dating and had not slept together or even shared a
passionate kiss.

   One night after spending the day with Rachel and she had gone, Alicia
came into the living room, naked, and put herself across my lap in my
recliner.  Now, around the house without underwear was acceptable, but
walking around naked in the house usually wasn't.  She spread her legs and
pulled my hand forcefully to her slit.

   I was surprised at this new development and mood in her.  Usually when
she wanted this she was calm and sensual.  This night she was aggressive
and didn't look happy at all.  I asked her what was wrong as I massaged the
outer lips of her familiar pre-teen sex.

   "Are you falling in love with Rachel?" she asked and I could see her
face full of worry.

   "Well, I know that I like Rachel and she seems like a nice person," I
thought about how to word it properly as my middle finger slid down around
her entrance to get a little bit of her natural lubrication and then I ran
my finger the length of her slit.  "I am not in love with her, but someday,
if things go well, I could be." I didn't know which way she wanted this to
go.  "Why?  What do you think of her?"

   I know I had only been out on three dates with Rachel, but two of them
had been day trips and I brought Alicia along.  We spent one day at the zoo
and the other we went ice skating as a group.  I realized I should have
asked Alicia what she had thought of Rachel after the first trip.

   "I don't like you going out with her," she responded as she relaxed in
my arms and I felt her clit start to swell under my soft touch.  "If you
have her, then you won't need me anymore."

   I was shocked at her reasoning.  "Alicia, I will always need you.  I
will always love you.  You're my Angel."

   She smiled at the encouragement or it could have been that she was
getting closer to her orgasm.  I told you that I had learned exactly how to
push her buttons.  By then it was just a habit to be efficient at it.  "But
she can give you sex and I can't," she said reaching over and gripping the
bulge in my shorts.

   I didn't know where she learned the proper use of the word sex and
intercourse, but that was a question to be asked later when she wasn't so
concerned about her future.  "What makes you think that is what I want?"

   She looked at me with one of those `get real' looks.  "Come on, Dad.  I
know what's supposed to happen during sex.  You're hard every night.  I
know.  I take care of you." And that part was true.  My Alicia did take
care of me whenever she noticed my dick standing up for her.

   "Alicia, no matter what you may think or what we do, I will always need
you in my life.  It doesn't matter if we mess around or if we never touch
each other again.  I'll still love you." I told her whole heartedly.

   She smiled teasingly.  "Please don't ever stop touching me.  I love it
when you do it," and at that moment, I began pressing fast against her
clit. She arched her back and could barely finish her sentence before she
climaxed.

   The next night, I called Rachel and told her that I had a lovely time
with her, but we wouldn't be able to keep dating.  I told her the truth,
mostly anyway.  I told her that Alicia was my priority and she just wasn't
ready for me to start dating.  Rachel wished me well and hoped that Alicia
didn't harbor resentment toward her.  I didn't hear or see much of Rachel
after that.  There were a few emails here or there, but I hope she found a
nice guy to be with.

   In my mind, I knew that I had allowed Alicia to come between us and she
had done exactly like my sister had done in her life, but she was my
everything.  If it meant giving up dating until she was old enough to
understand things, then I would do that.

   Chapter 6 - Alicia at Twelve

   When Alicia was twelve, she discovered the joys of the internet.  That
isn't entirely accurate.  She had been playing on the internet and
computers since she was three, but discovered porn on the internet at
twelve.  That one really was my fault.  I had a hidden stash of porn on the
computer.  I had no idea that she had learned to access it and had been
watching it for a month before I caught her.

   I never considered myself a pedophile.  I didn't look at kids that way.
I wasn't attracted to children or Alicia's friends and classmates.  The
only one I ever had any pull toward was Alicia.  She was my precious one
and I felt nothing to any other child.

   To convince myself that I wasn't a pedophile, I made sure to keep a
healthy supply of normal porn on the computer and watch it from time to
time while Alicia was out of the house.  I was still attracted to adult
women, even though I knew that dating and actually sleeping with them would
have to wait until Alicia could handle another woman in my life.  So porn
was an alternative.

   The way I found out that she had been watching porn on the internet was
another story.

   We were in my bed and she was stroking my member.  By now, she was good
at it and didn't tire at all.  I had my hand on her leg and was rubbing her
thigh.  That was as much as I trusted myself to do.  Her chest had been
developing and she had breasts that suck out like half oranges at the time
tipped with cute nipples that turned bright red when teased.

   "Daddy, if I asked you to stay still, would you let me try something?"
she asked with a lustful smile.

   "That depends.  What do you want to do?" I said knowing that lately she
had been trying new things to try to excite me.

   She gave me no warning.  She pulled her long golden hair, which was down
past her shoulders back and leaned down close to my member.  She wrapped
her lips around the head of my dick and I could feel her tongue dancing
around the tip.

   I sucked in a breath feeling the incredible new pleasure.  I saw her
eyes look up at me and the corners of her mouth come up in a slight smile
from my reaction.  She held me there for a few moments and then started
bobbing her head slightly up and down my member.

   I am not overly big or long.  I would say I was average from what little
I've seen and heard of from other guys.  I wouldn't make it in the porn
industry or anything.

   She had no trouble taking my dick in her mouth and she could take most
of it in her mouth when she went down deeply on it.  She kept me that way
for several minutes as she brought me closer and closer to my peak.

   "I'm going to cum soon.  You need to stop," I whispered to her as I
moaned from the wonderful feelings that she gave me.

   She stopped just long enough to whisper to me.  "No, I want this," and
devoured my cock once more.

   I couldn't hold back any longer.  I remember one hand being on the bed
and the other that was on her leg had moved and was kneading her breast and
pulling lightly on her nipple.  My precious Alicia sucked and began
swallowing my seed for the first time.  She didn't hesitate or gag.  There
were four good shots of semen and she didn't lose a drop.  It was the
hardest that orgasm that I think I have had up until that point.  She
sucked on my member until it softened in her mouth and then she come off of
it and continued to massage it with her hand as she leaned up to my face.

   I looked at her in wonder.  Her face was a glow with pride and
affection. I guess the amazement shown on my face because she was
practically beaming as she lied against me.

   "And that's just the beginning," she whispered as she let me settle down
from the powerful experience.

   I didn't know what she meant by it and if I had been in my right mind, I
would have picked up on what she said.  That night, I was too amazed to
start asking questions.  I should have been asking myself where she had
learned to do that or what she had meant by her statement.  Instead, I
wanted to reward her for her effort.

   That night, I put her on her back with her legs spread wide before me.
She was already very wet.  I surprised her by leaning down and tasting her
for the first time.  When my tongue played across her clit, she screamed in
ecstasy.  I had never gone down on her before that.  I knew her scent and
had thought about what she might taste like, but I was completely wrong. 
She had a sweet taste that I could have spent all night on.  I licked the
full length of her and stopped to nibble and suck on her clit each time I
came across it.  She had her fingers tangled in my hair, pulling me harder
into her.  She hit her first orgasm in minutes and I milked it for all that
I could.

   Then, I did something that was out of character for me.  To this day, I
still believe I was wrong for it.  I slid my tongue down to her tight
entrance.  I don't know if it was because the taste was so much sweeter
there or if somehow that night she had sparked more of a reaction from my
body than I could take.  I pressed my tongue into her shallow entrance.  It
was so tight that I actually felt her muscles contract on my tongue and
squeeze it.  I heard her gasp as the new sensation hit her and she arched
her back.

   I'm not sure, but I could have sworn that I felt the resistance of her
hymen on the tip of my tongue.  I swirled around inside her with the tip of
my tongue and I heard her moan once again.  I pressed my face tight against
her trying to see if I had actually made contact with her barrier again.  I
heard her moan and climax.  She tightened around my tongue as her muscles
spasmed.

   My eyes snapped open in panic as I realized what I was doing!  I was
pushing her cherry!  I had to catch my breath.  I licked back up to her
clit and tried to look like everything was fine.  I carried her down from
her powerful ride as I slid up next to her and used my hand to massage the
last ebbs of waves of pleasure to her.

   She slid up next to me and I could feel her mood change.  I saw the
trickle of tears as she held me close.  At first, a wave of guilt flooded
me.  I believed that I had caused her pain and that was something that I
swore I would never do.  I knew that we would have to talk about it.

   "I'm sorry," I told her knowing that I had been in the wrong to even get
close to her virginity.

   She looked at me stunned.  "Daddy, I'm not sad," she said even though
tears were on her face.  "It was the most wonderful feeling that I've ever
felt," she said and I felt fifty pounds of guilt evaporate from my chest.

   I reached up and wiped her eyes.  "The why the tears, Baby?" I asked not
understanding.

   She took a breath to get a grip on herself.  "Because it was amazing! 
And I don't know how to say it, but I wanted more.  I don't understand it."

   I calmed her and stroked her golden hair as she rested and eventually
fell asleep laying on me.



   I lay awake for hours that night.  I wanted to get up and pace, get on
my tread mill and walk a few miles, or anything except lay there under the
warmth of a girl who adored me and whom I almost betrayed.  I couldn't
believe that I let myself get so close to pushing my desires on her.

   The other concept that bothered me was that even though she didn't
understand it fully, her body was craving sexual intercourse.  She came so
violently just from me barely pushing on her barrier and made her want more
to the point that it drove her to tears.  That scared me.  I knew she would
continue to want it until she achieved her goal.

   I had done some research over the years.  Considering the level of
sexual molestation that she was accustomed to, I wanted to know all there
was to know about sex on girls of a young age.  None of it was very
promising.

   And most of it didn't seem to apply to my precious Alicia, either.  She
wasn't anything like what was documented on the internet.  She wasn't
promiscuous with others.  She had a normal attraction to boys, albeit she
had no current plans for a boyfriend.  She had one when she was eleven, but
boys were still weird and the most she did was hold his hand.  She seemed
to separate what we did and what was supposed to happen in relationships.
The things we did were special between only her and me.  She didn't seem to
consider doing anything sexual with anyone else.

   She had normal friends at school, even though she seemed to be the
center of her social circle; I attributed that to her mother's influence.
She got good grades.  She was healthy and outgoing with people.  She didn't
resemble any of the cases of child molestation that I had read about or
show signs of emotional damage.

   The only thing that I could really see on her that I knew would be a
problem in the future was being over protective of me.  I didn't believe
that was a problem I would have to deal with for a while.

   I did put some effort into researching virginity, though (and it was
more than watching porn videos of it!) I had only the one sister and we
weren't close.  I had never been with a virgin before of the three serious
relationships that I had in college.  I didn't know exactly what to expect.
I silently hoped over the years that she wouldn't have a hymen and be
spared that physical pain when the time came.

   Unfortunately, in everything I found (that wasn't fictional smut) it
said that this pain couldn't be avoided.  It didn't seem to matter if it
was done fast or slow or in which setting.  I was very conflicted because I
didn't want to cause this pain to my little girl, but it was apparent that
she was going to be ready for it soon.

   Chapter 7

   The next day went as normal, but that night, she didn't even ask when we
got into bed.  She went automatically to sucking me off.  She even seemed
happy to do it.  It was like a new game to her and she wanted to know how
to make the best score possible.  I told her several times that she didn't
have to do it for me, but she insisted that she liked it.  I told her that
she didn't have to, but every part of me was reveling in having this hot
young woman wanting to suck me off at night.

   About twice a week, I would go down on her, but I never let myself get
out of control like the first night.  I would concentrate on her pleasure
and even though I could feel a little bit of her disappointment that I
didn't use my tongue to explore her entrance again.  She loved me licking
her clitoris.

   After a week, I even started moving her to different positions and in
different areas of the house.  I think her favorite was on the washer on
spin cycle.  I unbalanced the load in the washer on purpose and then set
her on top of it.  She had a curious look on her face, but then felt the
vibrations under her bottom.  My tongue was like an electric shock as I
licked her slit up and down.

   She tried to pull me into her room one night saying that she had a
position in mind by her large mirror, but I refused.  She told me that my
silly rule shouldn't matter anymore and that she wanted to do stuff in
there.  I wouldn't budge on it on the matter.

   It was almost funny what she tried next.  She slid her night shirt up a
little and teased.  "I'm already wet.  You should just come in here and
have a little taste." I could see her small mound and tuft of hair growing
on the top.  It was light blonde just like her hair and was almost
transparent.

   I know that she thought she was being seductive, but I almost laughed at
the attempt.  I hid my reaction from her.  I don't know where she had seen
or heard of a woman saying anything like that, but her impersonation lacked
a few things.

   I did tell her solidly no and told her that if she didn't let it go,
that there would be no play time that night.  That got her off the idea
fast.  It had been years since I had to threaten to withhold her
masturbation from her, but she had never forgotten the guidelines.



   A few weeks later, she started asking a lot of questions about her
virginity.  We had the "talk" about it years ago and she accepted the PG-13
version of it during the daytime.  She had never really explored much into
it until after the first night when I gave her an orgasm from inside of
her.

   It was a normal night.  We were on the couch in the dim light in the
living room.  The shades were drawn which was customary in my house.  She
was lying against me as I sat on one side of the couch.  She was reading a
book and I was watching the news.  She had her legs naturally splayed for
me and I was on gently massaging the outside of her vaginal lips.  I hadn't
dipped inside her, but it wasn't time for that just yet.  This was just the
warm up.

   I didn't initiate the intimate touching.  She just curled up with her
book and got into position, pulling up her night shirt and waited for me.
This was customary.  I knew from experience that if I didn't touch her when
she was like that she would either think that something was wrong, or take
my hand and put it on her sensitive area for me.

   "Do you want to have sex with me?" she asked out of nowhere not looking
up from her book.  I had dodged this question a few times over the years.
Most of the time, she would drop the subject.

   "I told you before, that I love you, but that will hurt badly for you. I
won't do that to you," I said as I leaned over and kissed the top of her
head affectionately.

   "But do you want to?" she asked matter-of-factly.

   I considered her for a moment.  I couldn't tell if she was really
reading her book or if she was just using it as cover to not have to look
at me.  I also considered that this lovely girl had been intimate with me
for years.  I knew every part of her life, except that she had been
sneaking around watching porn on my computer for a month.  I didn't know
what it would do, but I decided to be honest with her.  "Yes," I told her.
"I would like to be able to have sex with you, but I won't do it if it's
going to hurt you."

   "Would you if I asked you to?" This time she turned her head and I
looked into her beautiful blue eyes.

   I was still rubbing just the outside of her to stimulate her, but
nothing major so I knew that it was her talking and not her lust.  I shook
my head slowly.

   She looked down and took a hold of the hand that was touching her.  I
didn't react until I felt what she was doing.  She took my middle finger
and pressed it at her entrance sending it inside her up to the first
knuckle.

   I heard her gasp as she spread her legs wider.

   I braced my other fingers against the outside of her entrance and didn't
let her penetrate herself any further.  I felt the heat and tightness grip
my finger inside of her.  The end of my finger barely pressed upon her
hymen, but her muscles clamped down on the invader.  I resisted the urge to
jerk my hand away fearing that it could physically hurt her.

   She stopped pressing on my hand and talked carefully.  I could tell she
was in discomfort.  I had never touched her there with the exception of my
tongue just the once.  I was always scared of accidentally breaking her
hymen.  "Daddy, I want you to do this," she said slowly.  "I don't care
how, but I want it to be you.  I want to give my cherry to someone who I
know loves me rather than some random guy who will leave me after he's
done. I love you and I want it to be you."

   "Let go," I tell her very seriously.  I have almost never had to be
stern with her in any matters concerning sexual contact.  Somehow we had
separated our father-daughter life from our intimate life that we shared
with each other.  We had done a good job of not letting them mix.

   She could tell that she had crossed a line and quit pressing on my hand.
She relaxed with her hands and the muscles inside her on my finger.  I slid
it out carefully and heard her let out a breath as I did.  "Please Daddy,"
she said as she looked up at me again.  "Please do this for me."

   "I'll think about it," was all that I could tell her.

   It seemed to be enough for her at the moment.  She laid her head back
against me and waited for me to resume giving her vaginal area attention. I
rested my hand that had been giving her attention on her leg.  She had set
her book down during the ordeal and was watching my hand.

   I had no idea what was going through her head.  I did know that she was
about a half an inch from breaking her own hymen.  I knew that I had to
take her request for intercourse seriously now.  If she did something like
that again, she could hurt herself.  I didn't want that, but part of me
knew that anything sexual with her had to be made pleasurable for her.  I
wanted nothing else but happiness for her in her life.

   After a few moments of silence between us and the television still on
forgotten, she asked in a small voice, "Are you going to make me sleep in
my room tonight?"

   That was code for if I was going to deny her pleasure and kick her out
of my bed, or what really was our bed by now.  I considered it for a
moment.

   "Please don't," she said following it up.  "Even if you don't take care
of me, let me sleep in your bed and take care of you."

   I heard the emotion in her voice and the pleading with me not to be mad
at her.  "It's okay, Baby.  I'm not mad." I told her running my fingers
through her hair soothingly.  I leaned down and kiss the top of her head
once again to show her I meant it.

   She reached over to my hand on her knee and tugged gently on my pinky
back toward her special place between her legs.

   "It'll be okay," I said again and moved my hand back her mound and
started rubbing the outside of her vaginal area like I was before.  "I'll
think about it," I told her one last time.

   The rest of the night was pretty normal.  In bed, I made sure to show
her that I harbored no bad feelings for her earlier actions.  My mind was
spinning though.  It wasn't a question of if I was going to be the one to
take her virginity, but how I could do it in the best way possible for her?

   Chapter 8

   That weekend, Alicia asked me to take her shopping.  In most ways,
Alicia is a normal girl.  On this occasion she was different.  Instead of
wanting to go by the book or music store, she wanted to go to Victoria
Secret.  I asked her if she wanted me to come in with her, but she said
that she didn't want me to feel uncomfortable in there.  I took that as
code for me to wait, so I found a bench outside the doors as she went in.

   I get bored easily and didn't think to bring a book or something to pass
the time, so I searched for a way to keep myself occupied.  The answer came
from the bench behind me.  A woman in her late twenties was sitting rubbing
her feet.  She had several bags with her from various stores, but I didn't
see anything out of the ordinary.  She was pretty and looked like she had a
long day.

   "Is everything okay?" I asked giving her a smile from behind.

   "Yeah," she said after looking me over.  I watched her do a quick survey
of me before she decided I was harmless enough to talk to.

   She had black hair and very cute smile.  She had dark brown eyes that
matched well with her tanned skin.  She didn't appear to be athletic, but
she wasn't chubby, either.

   "If you don't mind, I know my way around a foot or two.  Do you mind if
I give it a shot?" I asked gesturing to the foot that she was rubbing.

   She thought about it for a moment and then decided that I could be worth
a few minutes and a foot massage.  I moved to bench beside her and she
offered her foot to me.  I was careful with her and turned on the charm.  I
massaged her foot and found out that she was breaking in new shoes and had
been on her feet all morning shopping.

   We talked about various things and she let her guard down for the most
part.  I told her that my daughter was inside the store, but at the age
where she wanted privacy to shop for underwear.

   Thinking about it, I didn't know exactly why she wanted privacy at the
time.  I didn't brazenly walk in on her showering or changing.  Our play
time at night for the most part was in her pajamas and usually ended up
with us completely nude.  She couldn't have been hiding her body from me. I
should have assumed that she was hiding the clothing instead.

   The woman's name was Janet and she seemed sweet.  She was single.  I hid
my smile when I heard that.  After a little bit of me rubbing her foot, she
offered me the other one to work on.  I gave her a slow massage to relax
her feet.  Even her feet were nice and attractive.  I had her closing her
eyes from time to time enjoying the nice treatment.  While I rubbed on her,
information started pouring out of her.  I learned that she was recently
divorced with no children, even though she had wanted them.  She had just
moved to the area with the intent of getting her life back on track.  She
worked as a nurse and was excited about meeting people in the area.  I gave
her my Facebook information, but told her that I wasn't that social.  I
warned her that my work and my daughter took up almost all of my life.

   I didn't tell her that I had grown distant with most of my male friends
because I didn't want them around Alicia.  I was afraid that they would be
able to sense something off about her.

   "Daddy," an annoyed Alicia said standing a few feet away with two bags
of Victoria's secrets hidden in them.  "I want to go," she snapped.

   I gave her a stern look telling her that she was not the boss here. 
"How about you have a seat for a minute," I said and she understood this
wasn't a question.

   She came over to the bench and put her bags down and almost sat on my
lap.  She wrapped her arms around my waist.  "Thank you, Daddy, for
bringing me here." She was back to my sweet girl, but I felt that she
didn't remove her arms from my waist.  I knew what she was doing.  She was
claiming me in front of Janet.

   Janet chucked as she saw it.  "I'm going to have to go," she said
slipping on her shoes that had done the damage to her feet.  "I'll talk to
you later," she said as she smiled and walked away.

   I watched her go as Alicia waited by my side.  She seemed to relax after
Janet left, but looked concerned when she saw me watch her leave.  For just
a moment, I saw Janet look back and we both smiled.  That's when I knew
that I would definitely hear from her again.

   I turned my attention to my daughter.  "Did you find everything you
wanted?" I asked.

   "Yes, but I have one more stop if you'll let me," she said biting her
bottom lip.

   Our mall was one of the big two story ones.  It had almost anything you
would expect in them.

   I worked on computers and a major communication company at the time. 
(No, I cannot disclose it because if any of this gets out, I'm sure they
would be in line to sue me because they don't want their good name
associated with someone like me.) But they treated me well and I did have a
good income and could work on a flexible schedule.  Some of my work was
linked to my home computer so that allowed me the freedom to be a single
parent and still have a career.

   Alicia received and allowance every week.  She was actually very good
with math, figures, and money.  She had her money budgeted out for the
stuff that she wanted and had even learned the joy of online shopping and
free shipping by the time she was eleven.

   What can I say?  I guess they teach this stuff in elementary school or
something now.

   She asked for an advance on her allowance and because she was always
good with money, I gave it to her and a little more.  She rarely went and
splurged on herself so I enjoyed watching her when she did.  Mostly she was
a typical girl about it and bought clothes.

   This time, though, she walked me to one of those Goth stores in the mall
that have the darker themes going on.  I knew the shop, but hadn't been in
one for years.  Apparently things change with time as I quickly found out.
I let her roam about while I wandered around in there.  To my surprise, the
entire back half of the store was a light version of a sex shop!  It
probably was probably pushing the limits of allowing people under eighteen
in there.  They had everything from novelty key chains, dildos, body
lotions, to a limited selection of videos.

   I wasn't embarrassed about any of it, but I tried to show a lack of
interest as well.  I was in there with my twelve-year-old daughter.  Who
goes shopping for sex toys with their daughter and isn't a pervert?

   I looked around and before I knew it, I heard her call from the counter
where the clerk was already ringing up her purchase.  Before I could get
close enough to get a clear view, the clerk who couldn't have been older
than eighteen or nineteen had Alicia's stuff in a black bag that I couldn't
see through.  The female clerk smiled at Alicia and told her to have a nice
day.  I got a weird look from her as she tried to figure out what to make
of me.

   I detected a whiff of Alicia's arousal, even though she was dressed in
jeans and light blue T-shirt.  It probably was only enough for me to be
able to pick up on, but it was there as she lingered at the counter.  She
must have had some pretty interesting thoughts to make her wet in the
store.

   I didn't let the clerk's reaction get to me and we left the store.  "So
what did you buy?" I asked curiously.

   "I'll show you later," she teased as we headed for the mall exit.



   My curiosity was driving me crazy as the evening went by and she hadn't
hinted to what she had in mind.  I let her have her fun.  We got take out
and she asked if we could go to my room as soon as it got dark.

   She asked me to undress and lay on the bed as she left and went to her
room.  I figured I'd play her game and see where it went.  I was under the
sheet when she came back in the room in a beautiful white see through top.
It supported her small breasts and I could see her areolas and nipples
clearly through.  In the center, it was held together by a single bow and
the fabric parted down the middle and her navel was exposed as the thin
material parted on both sides of it.  Her panties were sheer and matching.
I could clearly see her slit.

   I think I was drooling and I had to make an effort to close my mouth
because she was stunning.  She posed for me and even turned around slowly
so I could take in the entire image of her.  Her panties were small in the
back revealing her firm ass.  The white only accentuated her perfect legs
and fair skin.  There was the tiniest flare of her hips that I'm sure would
develop as she matured.

   I had seen her naked since she was a baby.  But for one of the first
times that I can remember, I looked at her as a sexy young woman.  It could
have been a combination of the sexy outfit, her long blonde hair that was
curled at the ends, and the light makeup that she was wearing, but she was
beautiful.  She no longer appeared to be my twelve-year-old little girl.

   She came toward me with a confidence of a woman beyond her years.  She
crawled up on my bed and kissed my lips passionately as a lover would.  The
kiss felt like it made my heart explode.  Her lips were small and delicate,
but she used them to make mine submit.

   Out of all the messed up stuff that I had done to her, I did not kiss
her on the lips like this, ever!  I would kiss her on the forehead, the
cheek, her hand when she would scrape her knuckles on her bike, but never
had I kissed her on the lips like this.  It was another privilege that I
was trying to reserve for her future husband.  I had kissed her neck on
occasion and sucked her at her breasts to help make her orgasm, but I had
been careful not to kiss her on the lips.

   Now that I had tasted what her lips on mine, I knew that I had chosen
wrong.  She poured her heart into our shared kiss and I naturally brought
my hand up and running my fingers over her neck as we shared this one
perfect moment together.  We kissed for a few more moments that stretched
into the most perfect seconds of my life.  If ever there were a perfect
moment of happiness in a person's life: that would have been mine.

   I felt her hands travel my chest and pull the sheet off me.  I didn't
even notice, but my dick was standing tall and proud.  "Daddy," she said
pulling back slightly from me.  "I need it."

   "Yes, Baby," I said as she sat on the bed only inches from me.  "I'll
take care of you."

   "No," she said suddenly shaking her head.  "I need it," she said and I
could see that the hunger in her eyes.  She wasn't asking for me to
pleasure her like normal.  "I need you to do it," she added looking as if
she would break if I refused her.

   My mind went into overdrive.  I had thought about so many ways to
minimize the pain of her first time.  I had thought about making her soak
in warm water first.  I had thought about giving her pain pills to lessen
the pain.  My first reflex was to tell her no.  I desired her more than
anything, but I would put everything I wanted aside if it meant hurting
her. The only reason that I was considering it now was her begging for the
one thing that I had not given her over the years.

   She could see the indecisiveness on my face as I processed it.  "Please
Daddy.  I will do anything you ask.  But I need you to do this and I'm
going crazy trying to wait." She brought her hand up to my face with a look
fearful of rejection.

   "It's going to hurt," I said softly still trying to talk myself out of
it.

   She nodded.  "I know, but I'll be okay.  I won't be okay if I go out of
my mind needing you," she said.

   I thought it over but didn't like my own conclusion.  I resigned myself
to do this for her.  My dick didn't seem to like the idea of this either,
because it had deflated some as well.  If I was going to do this though, it
needed to be her choice and her moment.  I finally nodded and to her.

   "How do you want me, Daddy?" she said as she looked so innocent in her
white outfit.  She couldn't have chosen a more perfect outfit.

   In my mind, it represented her innocents.  She was pure, at least in a
virgin way and her only want was to give it to me.  "No, this is up to
you," I told her cupping my hand to the side of her face.  "I'll do it, but
you get to choose how."

   She smiled sweetly like she already had something picked out.  I should
have known that she had put a lot of thought into this.  She had picked out
an outfit to try to seduce me with and made a big production of our first
kiss.  Why wouldn't she have thought it all the way through?

   Alicia got up and took my hand.  She led me out of the bedroom to the
hallway.  I thought for a moment that we were heading to the living room
where we spent so many nights on the overstuffed couch or my recliner that
we had abused so many times.  I would have let her use any room in the
house, as long as it was what she wanted for her first time.

   She reached over and opened her bedroom door.  I stopped, still holding
her hand.  Her pretty light blue themed room looked out at me.  Her room
had never been intimidating to me.  I was in there for normal stuff, but I
had always made sure that any sexual stuff was done outside of the room. 
Now the room matched her exactly.  The room was for her innocents, just
like the outfit.

   She turned and looked back at me with her blue eyes.  "Daddy, I've
dreamed about this night since I was seven and saw you touching yourself.
I've spent so many nights dreaming of what it would feel like to finally
give this to you." She stepped through the threshold of the door and gently
made me put one foot in front of the other until I was inside.

   Her shades were drawn tight.  She walked over and turned on her lava
lamp and night light.  Then she turned the main light out and we were
bathed in the two dim lights coming from each side of her bed.

   I resisted the last urge that I had to walk out of the room and insist
on another room.  This needed to be her choice.

   She took my hand and I sat down on the bed with her.  I was still naked
and her comforter felt cool and soft against my skin.  I'm sure that she
had a similar experience sitting in front of me.

   "Are you sure that you want to do this in here?" I asked her unsure. 
Her room was the last place that she had a childhood in the house.  It was
the one place that she didn't have any memories of me touching her or
sexual transgression.  It was the one place that I intended to give her
complete security.

   "Yes, Daddy," she said with confidence.  She rubbed her hand over the
flat part of the bed.  "This bed is like me: a virgin.  I want tonight to
be when that to ends."

   "Turn down the sheets," I said getting up and walking out of the room. I
retrieved a towel from the hall closet.  Walking back into her room wasn't
as hard, but I felt like I was betraying her with each step toward her.

   When I came back in, she was laying on her back on just the bottom
sheet. Her head was propped up on her light blue pillow and her matching
bottom sheet accentuated her clothing and soft skin.  Part of me wished she
would have spent more of her childhood in here on this bed instead of mine.


   "If you want to stop, I don't care at what point we're at, you tell me
and we'll stop," I told her as she raised her hips to allow me to slide the
towel under her.  "I won't be mad or disappointed.  I love you and you
don't have to do this if you don't want to." I wanted her to call the
entire ordeal off.

   "I'm sure," she said confidently.  A look of excitement filled her eyes
as I slid her panties down her soft legs.

   "I love you so much," I said as I leaned down and kissed her lips once
again.  I let my hand travel up between her legs.  They immediately parted
to my touch.  I worked my way down her neck as I had when I had pleasured
her.  I let my kisses travel down to her chest as my fingers started
working their magic on her interior lips and I would pass her clit.

   Each time I would pass it, she would raise her hips slightly to prolong
the contact with her sensitive nub.  It was growing from my attention and
was probably large for a girl her age.  She was already very wet.

   Somewhere in my mind, it had connected the dots and sent the message to
my member that it was going to have a virgin shortly and without even
noticing, I was rock hard.  She knew it at the same moment that I did when
she felt it brush along her leg.

   She was rocking her hips rhythmically with my strokes.  I let my finger
slide down to her entrance and I tested it gently.  It was tight, but I was
able to get my first knuckle in and a little more before I found her hymen.
My prayer that it had disappeared magically had apparently gone unanswered.

   She bit her bottom lip feeling the new sensation inside her.  "Yes," she
said.  "That's where I want you," She leaned forward and placed her lips on
mine once again, but this time in lustful passion.  "I'm ready," she told
me and her eyes said that she was telling the truth.

   I knelt between her wide stretched legs.  Her slit gapped open
glistening pink peeked out beautify from the inside folds.  I removed my
finger from inside her and guided the swollen head of my dick up and down
her slit, covering it with her moisture.  After three passes, it was
glistening in the low light as well.  It looked impossibly big when put
next to her small entrance.

   I hesitated again as I started to line up the head with her entrance
until she moved her hips upward to try to move it in.  My dick was still
solid despite my apprehension.  I had dreamed about taking her this way for
years.  I just never thought it would happen while she was this young.

   "Daddy," she said as she reached down and took my hand.  "I need you to
promise me something."

   I paused with the head at her entrance.  I could the crown of it on the
tip.  "Anything," I told her looking up into her sweet face.  I was torn
now between wanting her and wanting her to tell me to stop.  Whatever she
said, I would do though.

   "When you do it, don't stop," she said as I saw a look of nervousness on
her face for the first time since we started.  Surely she felt the
slightest pressure at her entrance as well.  "I want you to cum in me. 
Don't stop until you do, no matter what.  This is what I want for my first
time."

   I didn't answer her.  I knew I couldn't give her an honest answer.  I
would stop at her slightest request.  As much as I lusted after her, I
loved her.  She was my precious one.  I had never any intentions of
anything going this far.

   I gave a slight nod and reached down and started rubbing on her clit
again.  This time I was intending to drive her crazy.  I teased it as only
I knew how.  In seconds a moan escaped her lips.

   I leaned forward by an inch and the head of my dick disappeared inside
of her.  She inhaled a huge gulp of air feeling the new sensation.  I saw
the look on her face and felt her spread her legs wider.  I kept up the
assault on her clit and took my hand that was guiding my member up to her
breast.  I started to put every effort into making filling her so full of
pleasure, that just maybe her first real sex wouldn't be a horrible one.  I
let her virgin entrance adjust to the size of me as I manipulated her body.
It responded quickly and I felt her relax.

   I was playing with her nipple and squeezed it gently as I slid forward
another half inch.  Her reaction this time was slight, but I felt the
resistance inside of her.  I knew this was the last moment of her sexual
innocents.  She reached down and interlocked her fingers with my hand on
her chest.  Her voice was in a half moan, but she locked eyes with me and
nodded.

   I pressed into her, incredibly slow.  I watched her face as I felt her
hymen give way inside of her.  The pressure was off the end of my dick and
it slid into her.  She was still impossibly tight.  I felt her muscles
along the lining of her entrance spasm from the invasion in her very young
pussy.

   I heard her whimper but she held her mouth shut to mute the sounds of
pain.  I saw tears well in her eyes.  Her face, of what was lust and
passion just thirty seconds ago was suddenly my precious little girl again.
I almost tore out of her and ran from the room.  I looked down and saw that
my dick was buried almost three quarters into her little pussy.  It looked
so incredibly tight and felt as if a vice was squeezing it because it was
still gripping it.  I could see the smallest drop of pink run down the
curve of her to the towel.

   In that moment, I realized I was the monster that I had become.  Maybe
everything up to this point, I could rationalize away to myself.  I could
tell myself that all the other stuff that we had done so far she had
wanted. I could even make myself believe that she enjoyed all of it, no
matter how perverse.  She had always come to me asking greedily for more.
But this was something that she couldn't have imagined.  Her virginity was
something that she couldn't have had the concept of at her young age.  This
was on me.  This guilt was mine.  I had done this to her.

   I guess I hesitated too long.  My dick was still in her, but I wasn't
moving.  I was stroking her clit, but I'm sure that it didn't compare to
the feeling of being stretched from inside of her.

   "Daddy," she said breaking me out of my thoughts.  I saw her take a deep
breath relaxing her legs.  "I'm okay," she said and tried to smile.  "But
if you don't fuck me, I won't be," she warned.

   I started with slow and even strokes.  I leaned down over her body and
she pulled me close to her.  I was careful not to put my weight on her, but
I kept the strokes, that were probably only strokes of a few inches at
most, even.

   I heard her start to pant.  Then she let out a loud moan and started
moving her hips with my thrusts.  "That's my girl," I said letting out a
sigh.  My only hope was that I could make her feel good enough to forget
the pain that I just caused her.

   She looked at me and all traces of pain were gone.  "It feels good now,"
she purred.  "Wow!" Then she started fucking me with all the force she
could muster.  She was still very tight, but her moisture made it possible
for my dick to slide in and out of her only by inches at a time.  After
just a few minutes of us this way, she shuttered and wrapped her arms
around me tight for a huge orgasm.

   I kept pumping my dick in and out of her through it.  My movements
didn't let her come down from it.  She went through another orgasm and then
I felt my own orgasm building.  I had doubts to if I would be able to make
it because of my emotional distress, but my hard member was not deterred
from his mission.

   She had been on birth control for almost a year now since she started
getting her periods.  I told the doctor it was to regulate her cycles, and
that was mostly true.  Since she usually slept naked with me, she had
miscounted and woke up with a stain on the bed one morning.  I guess my
subconscious knew that someday it would come to this and was taking the
precaution.

   I started lengthening my strokes until I was almost out of her and then
would push back in.  I felt my tip hit some resistance which must have been
her cervix, so I took it easy on her and didn't push in as deep as I could.
I was surprised that I had enough control for that with how I was lost in a
fiery haze of lust for her.  Everything was overwhelming: her delicate hair
that was wet with sweat from her brow, her arms around me pulling me even
tighter to her, her legs had wrapped around my waist attempting to pull me
deeper into her, he sweet smell of her arousal filling my nose and the room
for probably the first time, her soft voice moaning and with each thrust
inside her, and her tight young pussy squeezing my dick to the point that
it was almost painful, but so hot at the same time.  It was all too much
for me.

   "I'm going to cum, Baby," I warned her as my orgasm was past the point
of return.

   "Please do it," she begged.  "I love you," was the words that escaped
her lips as she felt me fill her.  I pressed three hard shots into her and
she was cumming one last time as I slowed my pace.  I gained control of my
senses.

   Alicia looked like a mess.  Her hair was matted with sweat.  I looked
down and as my member shrunk, I still pumped it in and out of her a few
times, but saw that flowing out of her as a mix of my seed and pink from
her broken hymen.  She was out of breath as if she had just run a marathon.
I started at her and could only think of how beautiful she looked.  She was
my Alicia, now more of a woman, but my precious Alicia all the same.  She
stared dreamily up at me with a smile on her face.

   Chapter 9

   I had her stay in bed while I ran a warm bath for her.  I picked her up
with the towel and all and carried her to the bath tub.  For the first time
in years, I gave her a bath.

   And no, before anyone gets the wrong idea, this was something special.
As I said before, we had a time and place for sexual contact.  I didn't
walk in on her showers.  I didn't walk in on her going to the bathroom.  I
didn't force her to walk around nude in the house.  I let her have her
privacy.

   She was exhausted at first.  I carefully undressed her.  She still
looked cute in the white top.  And I lowered her into the warm tub of
water. She didn't say anything at all.  Neither did I.  I saw her wince
when her red out lips touched the water.  They looked swollen and
irritated, but she didn't seem to be bleeding much.  The water helped her
relax and she leaned back and let me wash her.

   I slowly washed every part of her, including shampooing her hair.  I
didn't spend any extra time on her private parts.  This care wasn't done
for sexual pleasure.  During all of it, she kept her eyes on my face and
had a small affectionate smile on her face.  She'd offer me an arm when I
got to it or a leg or foot when the time came.  Her eyes stayed on me.  She
even giggled a little when I touched the bottom of her feet.

   I felt guilty because I knew what happened had changed her.  I didn't
know it what ways, but I knew that she would forever be changed.  The last
of her innocents that she had, she had given to me freely and wanted me
specifically to have it.  I knew I would cherish that and her every day of
my life.

   After I dried her, she took my hand and walked with me to my room. 
There we climbed into bed and she fell asleep in my arms.

   "Thank you, Daddy," she whispered.  "I love you."

   "I love you, Alicia," I told her.  I think I fell asleep as fast as she
did.



   The next day, I watched her and she seemed to have a little soreness,
but I gave her some pain pills for that and soon she was fine.  She was
more attached to me than ever!  It was like she couldn't stand to be away
from me.  She was positively glowing.  I didn't stop her and made an effort
to do regular stuff with her during that day.

   That night, after a long day of activities, she fell asleep in my bed
early.  I didn't touch her for the first time in a long while.  She had
just fallen asleep on her own so I let her sleep.  A few hours later, I
went to bed as well.  When I got comfortable, she cuddled up next to me and
let out a content sigh.

   I was glad that she hadn't changed that much, but I felt that she had
matured somewhat over night.

   The next night, she came to bed with me and wanted sex.  I convinced her
that we should give her time to heal, but I would do other things with her
if she wanted.  She agreed and I made her orgasm manually.  She wanted to
work on me, but I told her that I didn't feel like it.

   After three nights of the same, she looked hurt.  It wasn't her that was
the problem, it was me.  I felt guilty for enjoying something that caused
her pain.  I know that it happens with all women the first time, but that
doesn't mean I can't feel guilty for causing it.  She asked if she had done
something wrong or if she wasn't very good at sex.  I told her that it
wasn't her and that she was wonderful at sex.  I just didn't want to have
it just yet.

   The real reason was that for as wonderful as the sex was with her, it
couldn't block out the horrible memory of her whimper of pain that she made
when I took her cherry or the look of pain on her face as she looked at me
and I pushed into her.  I never wanted to take a chance of hurting her like
that again.  I had kept going because she had asked me to, but I never
wanted to cause that to her ever again.

   I didn't tell her that, of course.  I told her that we needed to take it
slow with sex and that I would still do all the things that I had done up
until that point.  She told me to prove it.  I let her touch me again and
bring me to climax.

   A week to the day of her losing her virginity had passed and I woke up
with her lying on my stomach.  I was on my back.  She was lying on the
center of me with her hands underneath her chin looking up at me as I
slowly woke up.  I looked up at her and could feel my morning wood pressed
against her.  She had done this before sometimes.  She would lay with my
dick wrapped in the warmth of her slit.  She liked the position because she
could feel me on her clit hood this way.

   "Good morning," I said looking up at her.

   "Good morning, Daddy" she said with a smile, and then I felt something
constrict around my dick.

   Oh my god.  It wasn't lying along the front of her slit.  It was in her
pussy!  My eyes snapped open.  I reached down and grabbed her hips.

   She saw my reaction and grinned wider.  She flexed again and sent an
electric current into my dick.  "What?" she said puzzled.  "This is why I
wanted to give you my cherry.  This is what I want to do with you." With
that, she pushed downward sending my hard dick further into her soft inner
folds.

   It felt wonderful and she didn't look to be in any pain or discomfort.
In fact, it was just the opposite!  She rocked back and forth and looked
like a ball of orgasmic pleasure.

   This time, with her on top, I let her have everything that she wanted.

   From then on, I wasn't afraid that making love would hurt her.  We did
it practically every night.  And just like the masturbation sessions, we
explored different ways, different rooms, and different positions to do it
in.  She liked it more than I did, I think.

   The general rules still applies.  I would let her come to me for it.  I
never went to her or told her that she must have sex with me or allow me to
touch her.

   We never made love in her room again.  Her bed wasn't a virgin anymore,
but that was all the sexual action it ever seen by my hand.  I still
refused to touch her in there despite her asking me several times.

   I caught her watching porn on the computer a little while after that. 
She confessed that it had given her the idea to try to seduce me.  She also
discovered a lot more on the internet.  I told her not to believe
everything that she saw there, but I didn't stop her from watching it if
she chose to.

   The day at the mall, she had actually picked up massaging oil and a
metal handcuffs.  She was a little embarrassed when she brought them out
one night when she dressed up for me in some lacy underwear.  I was shocked
when she wanted me to handcuff her and pretend to dominate her.  She said
that it had always been one of her fantasies, so I let her try it.  I
didn't hurt her, of course, but she liked the feeling of being restricted
when we had sex.  She would ask me to do it on rare occasions.

   I found out later, that there was a lot more to that than just harmless
fun.

   The present:

   So now I have a wonderful happy fourteen-year-old who loves me more than
anything and loves to ride my cock every night.  She matured physically
pretty fast, but I think that's my fault for introducing her to sexual
pleasure too early.  She doesn't really like any of the guys at school, at
least not at the moment.

   She's my precious Alicia and she knows that she means the world to me. I
don't date at the moment.  In the past, she has rarely had friends over to
spend the night because I won't allow her to do anything sexual when
they're here.  For some reason she has been begging for her friend to come
over and stay the night this weekend.  I'm going to let her, but I know her
well enough to know that something else is planned.

   I am thinking of making a second for this series, but I'm going to give
Alicia a break for a bit.

   Any comments or opinions can be emailed to m_19yr_old@hotmail.com .  I
appreciate any constructive opinions and if you like this story, please
check out others that I have wrote.