Crimson Review #019 This website contains mature and possibly sexual themes and links. If such writing is likely to offend you, or if it is illegal for you to read such writings, please find somewhere more appropriate to play |
"Everything about you is so F.I.N.E. fine ..." +----------------------------------------------------------------------- The missives below are merely opinions, publicly stated, but only opinions. Dragons may be immortal, but they are not infallible. Read the stories for yourself, and form your own opinions. Then, let the author know what you thought. Celeste's blowjob principle isn't smoke in the wind. - Crimson Dragon ([email protected]) /~Crimson_Dragon http://members.tripod.com/~Dragon_Of_Crimson Review Archives: /~Crimson_Reviews Thanks to Denny for checking over the reviews for obvious bungles, though ultimately any errors herein are mine and mine alone. +----------------------------------------------------------------------- Story Summary: +----------------------------------------------------------------------- Fugue -- anais ninja (MF mast rom) [10,10,10,10] Mrs. Steven Rudy -- Dryad (flash) [9,9,10,10] An Angel -- Patience Bryce (MF public) [5,6,3,3] Jacob, I Have Loved -- Molly Coddle (M/F, anal, rom, light dom) [9,9,8,8] The Taste of You -- Bluepen (Poems) [10,10,n/a,10] ROCOCO CLUB -- Spiller (Fm/Ff) [7,9,4,5] Valentine Visit -- Ray1031 (MF, Rom, Cons?) [10,9,8,9] Chocolate Covered Cherries: A Valentine Story -- Desdmona (MF cheat anal) [10,10,10,10] The Case of the Chocolate Covered Cherries -- Souvie (no sex, humor, flash fic) [10,Who Cares?,10,10] Reviews: +----------------------------------------------------------------------- Fugue -- anais ninja (MF mast rom) Story: http://assm.asstr.org/Year2003/40792 Author's Site: /~anais_ninja/ He's three thousand miles from her, away on a business trip. She understands, though she misses him terribly. Sipping at her Chardonnay, her hands begin to wander. She's three thousand miles from him, left home while he must face dreary business meetings. He misses her terribly. Sipping at his scotch from the mini-bar, his hands begin to wander. It isn't a simple thing to maintain the beautiful symmetry that anais has attempted here. Well, not and prevent it from sounding like a story told twice. Anais somehow holds this together, showing us two lives forced apart. But still somehow together. Tickled the romantic in me. Very nicely done, anais. Technical : 10 Eros : 10 Character/Plot : 10 Crimson : 10 +----------------------------------------------------------------------- Mrs. Steven Rudy -- Dryad (flash) Story: /~Dryad/mrsrudy.html http://assm.asstr.org/Year2003/40832 Author's Site: /~Dryad/ She's driving when the song makes its appearance on the radio. She sits in stunned silence, as she realises its messages and impact upon her life. Her husband is off somewhere, Mexico, Florida, St. Maarten, who knows ... with his short skirted assistant. [ {But she never thought led anywhere.} She smiled wistfully. ] Not sure what that sentence is supposed to be. Maybe a dropped 'it'? So, then, what exactly is Mrs. Stephen Rudy going to do? You'll have to read this story to find out. Technical : 9 Eros : 9 Character/Plot : 10 Crimson : 10 +----------------------------------------------------------------------- An Angel -- Patience Bryce (MF public) Story: http://assm.asstr.org/Year2003/40760 Our protagonist is surreptitiously checking out the ladies at a local pool. There is a wide variety of girls around, all scantily clad in bikinis and one-piece swimsuits. But one girl catches his eye, tantalisingly hidden in the deep end of the pool. Her eyes, her hair, though, capture his attention. When she asks him to help her adjust her top, he, of course, obliges. Then off to the deep end they go, to have an illicit semi-public coupling before the pool lights brighten the world. [ women in their various swimsuits. Some of the women {of course} were more attractive to his eyes {then} others. What a variety, young slender women in their teeny bright colored {bikini's}, older ... ] "of course" is a parenthetical expression here, and should probably be offset by commas. "then" might be better as "than", considering that they don't mean the same thing. If this were a one time error, I would assume it was a simple typo. But alas, it permeates the text. "bikini's" ... um, what are they possessing? And all this in the first paragraph. Sigh. [ ... check out every female there, front and back. He was always trying to find that {one special one} to especially keep track of, and maybe even ... ] Department of Redundancy Department. [ ... The sun had been making its decent from the sky, but ... ] "decent" is an adjective, right? I believe "descent" is more the noun that was desired here. They don't mean the same thing. Patience describes the dialogue, what little there is, in the text of the story. If the characters are talking, show us with quotes. It's far more effective than: She said that she thought she liked him. He said the same thing back. Overall, the characters are shallow, and the plot and consistency nearly non-existent. It works as a descriptive fantasy, and I'm pretty sure that's what Patience was trying for here. More for the stroke folks that like the idea of sex underwater where the participants might get caught. But that's really all there is to the story. Technical : 5 Eros : 6 Character/Plot : 3 Crimson : 3 +----------------------------------------------------------------------- Jacob, I Have Loved -- Molly Coddle (M/F, anal, rom, light dom) Story: http://assm.asstr.org/Year2003/40833 Jacob leads Zoe into the bedroom where he sits her down. Slowly, he plays with her, caressing, and preparing her for the anal sex yet to come. Now, according to the preface, this is the first story that Molly has shared with us. And it is a remarkably well written tale technically. There were a few issues, mostly in formatting: [ and then he let go of my body and sat down on the bed next {tome}. ] The story isn't particularly deep -- this is a description of a sexual encounter, and not much more than that. Now, having said that, what makes the story unusual is that we do get deeply into Zoe's head. I did like the anticipation, and the tension that Molly presented here. That gives the story an edge over most stroke stories, even while I would have liked to know the characters a little better or to understand her tension, or desire for it, in a depth beyond sexual activity. But such things come from experience, and since this is a first story, I think it is exceptionally well written. Now, as most of you know, I'm not a huge anal sex fiction fan. I can take it or leave it. Hmmm. I can see the perverts already making connections. The story, people. Concentrate. Despite this, I really did like the story far more than I expected to. Molly is very good at sexual description (but honestly, did Jacob have to say "Daddy" in third person quite so much ...), without falling too far into over-description. And the glimpses inside Molly's heroine's head were very much appreciated and helped hold the piece together. Nicely done, Molly. I look forward to reading your next piece. Technical : 9 Eros : 9 Character/Plot : 7 Crimson : 8 +----------------------------------------------------------------------- The Taste of You -- Bluepen (Poem) (and Longing (Poem)) Poems: http://assm.asstr.org/Year2003/40788 http://assm.asstr.org/Year2003/40786 Other works: http://assm.asstr.org/cgi-bin/field_search.cgi?search=bluepen43%40 |
© Copyright 2002-2008 - Crimson Dragon
All rights reserved
This site and its content are protected by copyright statutes. Please enjoy the reviews here freely, but permission in writing is required before redistributing any of the contents of this site or parts thereof. The author may be contacted via e-mail at [email protected] with questions, requests or comments.
You are visitor # since April 2003